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>> No. 5705 Anonymous
14th April 2017
Friday 9:52 pm
/poof/5705 spacer
Anyone recommend some breathable smart shoes?

It's so my feet don't end up in a sweaty mess at day's end.
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>> No. 5706 Anonymous
14th April 2017
Friday 9:59 pm
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Anything with full-grain leather inside and out.
>> No. 5707 Anonymous
14th April 2017
Friday 10:03 pm
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Unlined suede shoes are naturally breathable. Geox make leather dress shoes with perforated rubber soles. Either way, check the weather forecast, because you're shagged if it rains.


>> No. 5883 Anonymous
6th April 2011
Wednesday 5:52 pm
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Why do a lot of people seem to rave about Nando's?

My friends think I'm a freak because I very rarely eat Subway or Nando's; as far I can tell it's just, not especially good quality, grilled chicken that has been marinated in peri-peri sauce. Am I missing something here?
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>> No. 12220 Anonymous
4th February 2017
Saturday 1:57 am
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And a bit soggy bab.
>> No. 12298 Anonymous
13th April 2017
Thursday 4:20 pm
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I had a burger from 'Spoons today and it seems they've jumped on the chip spice bandwagon. However, their 'special seasoning' tastes like your chips have had the dust and crumbs from a packet of Skips chucked on them.

Standard 'Spoons service, though. One order wrong and for the five bean chilli they could have at least stirred it so it wasn't so blatantly obvious it was microwaved.
>> No. 12299 Anonymous
13th April 2017
Thursday 6:02 pm
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It's the same stuff they season steaks with and was a staff secret long before it came on the menu.

Get a side of sour cream and some raw onions, they go great with the chips.

The five bean chilli is indeed microwaved and so is the rice. It all comes in flash frozen from the main warehouse. How did you think its cooked?
>> No. 12300 Anonymous
13th April 2017
Thursday 6:08 pm
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>How did you think its cooked?

Microwaved. Hence me saying standard 'Spoons service.
>> No. 12301 Anonymous
14th April 2017
Friday 8:58 pm
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In that case, I don't know why you've got the hump that they didn't disguise it.


>> No. 21963 Anonymous
13th October 2016
Thursday 6:27 pm
/e/21963 Murders
Recreating various crisis outside situations or not results in invisibility and speed,altering you and reality,personally affecting reality,your mind returning to the past(time travel).People who are acidic,nervous,shitty and others are being assalted,bleeding and puking acid.They're hungrily pulling and grabbing peoples sleeping genitals,thirstily turning peoples places into a hotel/outhouse and anally attacking colon cleansed people .Surrounded by the future,the past and nightlights,barking dogs,abductions,disappearances,suicides,murders,suffocations,draining energy.Being pulled towards the future or the past along with your iron coins and other materials your in contact with and surrounded by,people are disappearing,people are being replaced with clones,robots,etc,people travelling back in time are being attacked,getting into accidents or sending messages.People are travelling to the future and to the past.Aliens,people are visiting and sometimes leaving this world,which worlds and times are they from?They're stealing peoples DNA,cloning,growing and using the clones.The souls of the dead and others are travelling into other peoples bodies to be young and healthy.The things in the spectrums that have the opposite affect of the things in the spectrums that cause aging,retards,sickness,etc and there's the others in the middle.Some people know other peoples thoughts and are communicating telepathically,interuptions,influencing,scolding,interference,torturing and controlling peoples minds.People are communicating with other people through nightmares.People are using other people to say their thoughts.They're turning people into traitorous sex fiends or idiots by getting them to look at and/or sniff something or by injecting them with something,preparing them for what´s happening now and after(animalism),your suspicious,nature's,etc examples,stuck in this nest.They're waking people up again and again and people are waking up in this place and they're causing other sleeping problems and deaths,picking,poking,prodding,digging people with medical instruments.The TV creeps and others are accusing people of being criminals and others in a past life,threatening,hynotising,insulting and bothering people about what they are doing,saying and their thoughts,maybe they'll reach through the screen and your reality show from this world,concluding the experiments and cleaning the cages.
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>> No. 21986 Anonymous
19th October 2016
Wednesday 1:19 am
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Nah, it's a forced mod meme.
>> No. 21987 Anonymous
19th October 2016
Wednesday 1:27 am
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You assume incorrectly.

Yes, the mods on here have been forcing a word salad meme on multiple chans for the past 5 years. Idiot.
>> No. 21988 Anonymous
19th October 2016
Wednesday 1:46 am
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We'll know soon enough it's her because she'll start linking the britfa to a GCHQ mindwashing program run out of a secret purple shed in one of the many quiet gardens overlooking The Doughnut.
>> No. 22114 Anonymous
14th April 2017
Friday 3:38 pm
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Emily is a fucking nutter who we discovered by accident. She subsequently wove into her conspiracy which was very entertaining.
>> No. 22115 Anonymous
14th April 2017
Friday 6:15 pm
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She thinks we are life-sciences twats with microchipped penises.


>> No. 25866 Anonymous
13th April 2017
Thursday 5:56 pm
/g/25866 Iphone 7
'Evening, chaps.

I currently own an iPhone 6, but I'm coveting an iPhone 7.
Does anybody own an iPhone 7? Would it be worth it? Are they any different from an iPhone 6?

Cheers, chaps.
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>> No. 25867 Anonymous
14th April 2017
Friday 12:24 pm
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Stick with the 6S until next year would be my view. It's not enough of an upgrade over that to justify the cost.
>> No. 25868 Anonymous
14th April 2017
Friday 12:54 pm
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Ta very much, I appreciate it.


>> No. 5456 Anonymous
4th April 2014
Friday 3:02 am
/lit/5456 Vurt
This was really good.
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>> No. 6583 Anonymous
21st March 2017
Tuesday 7:53 pm
6583 Michel Houellebecq - The Possibility of an Island
I think this book is supposed to be philosophy in the way that Camus or Kafka can be but there wasn't a great deal of that, at least not in the way they handle it. The book deals with potential eternal life in a way that doesn't seem to me to be even remotely philosophically sound. Immortality through cloning yourself and injecting some liquid from your brain into the clones that supposedly gives it your personality but not, it seems, any of your memories.

It's sort of a pessimist romance novel in a way; the characters have some ideal of love or passion that seems very important to them but also unattainable while that's not important. Perhaps it's the idea of the possibility of them that makes things worthwhile, not ever getting them?
I don't know. I enjoyed the central character's cynicism and mildly idiotic (for seemingly ironic reasons) sense of humour. Gloomy and grumpy but it never occurs to him to give up on things. Lots of sex without really being sexy. Sex is an act clearly relished, but the telling of it is quite matter-of-fact. It's very masculine French; I felt as though cigarette ash and the smell of dried red wine were billowing out of the pages as I turned them. If you have any idea what the author looks like, it's impossible not to picture the character as much the same.
He does mention Islam a few times but he's just as rudely dismissive about other religions; perhaps his work Submission is what got people really riled about his apparent Islamophobia. I had other things to say about the book but I forgot them so they're probably not important.
>> No. 6584 Anonymous
26th March 2017
Sunday 10:32 am
6584 Michel Houellebecq - The Map and the Territory
This was better, definitely scratched a philosophical itch and seemed to be saying something interesting about models, maps, children, all sorts of reproduction and their eventual decomposition, a very melancholy book by the end of it and kept thematically tight.
I did find myself becoming exasperated at the lengthy descriptions of the history of Bichon, William Morris and the lives of flies but they were there for a good reason in the end.
>> No. 6585 Anonymous
28th March 2017
Tuesday 9:21 am
6585 China Miéville - The Last Days of New Paris
I've been fairly critical of Miéville in the past but reading this I think he's finally matured as a writer. It has many of his favourite themes (anti-fascism, partisans, mech-people, urban fantasy, etc) but they're assembled cogently, the world makes "sense" and is full of interesting stuff he has clearly researched extremely thoroughly. At just over 100 pages, unlike Embassytown you don't get the sense that he's stretched out a small number of ideas needlessly for the sake of being the length of a novel.

If you're going to read anything of his, let it be this.
>> No. 6586 Anonymous
4th April 2017
Tuesday 8:28 pm
6586 John Rechy - City of Night
Some superficial similarities to Close to the Knives, but pre-AIDS so somewhat different. It's not unlike a series of character studies in segments tied together into an over-arching narrative of the narrator's own journey. Lots of very real, very lonely and insecure people. A very powerful piece of writing.

>“It’s strange that we should have to force ourselves not to love—or share, if you dont like that other word—even force ourselves not to acknowledge that love is possible. And so we make the world even more rotten than it was when we discovered its rot; justifying ourselves by saying it’s the only way: Get tough. Or be swallowed by it. And we further that original alienation. . . . And by ‘rot’ I mean only all the things that repress and forbid—the rot created by people in order to keep themselves from facing the real horror—within themselves—the coldness, the lack of understanding—. . .”
>> No. 6594 Anonymous
14th April 2017
Friday 12:46 pm
6594 Patrick Rothfuss - The Name of The Wind
Someone lent me their copy of this, recommending it.
Nope. Nopenopenope. Empty calories for the brain. An immensely dislikeable Gary Stu protagonist in a fedora and the friend zone. Fuck this book and fuck Patrick Rothfuss.


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>> No. 4122 Anonymous
5th April 2017
Wednesday 2:47 pm
>The most popular dildoes are only 4.5 - 5" in circumference.

>In a study women picked models benises 4.8 - 5" in circumference as the ideal.

>The average erect benis girth is about 4.5 - 5 ".

So you've probably got enough girth for 90% of grills. But...

>The most popular dildoes have 6 - 7" of insertable length.

>Women chose models benises about 6 - 6.5" in length as the ideal.

>The average erect benis length is about 5 - 5.5".

You probably don't have enough length for most women.
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>> No. 4135 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 9:26 pm
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Maybe those are women inches. 8 = 6 and 6 = 4 .
>> No. 4136 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 3:11 am
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Apropos of nothing much at all:

I've never talked inches (or centimeters) with any of them but I've shagged a fair few cock-wranglers and none of them ever complained about my utterly average knob (or even slagged me off as being small-knobbed during any one of a zillion heated slanging matches). Honestly, once you've bedded 4-5 30+ cock whores and they all love your average knob life gets a lot easier.

Sorry if none of this makes sense lads, I'm pissed to fuck la.
>> No. 4137 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 11:03 am
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Have you ever measured your dick? Maybe you're bigger than you think.
>> No. 4138 Anonymous
13th April 2017
Thursday 11:19 pm
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Honestly I think that it's mainly just that (at least in my experience) women tend to care a lot less about genital aesthetics (size, shape, and so on) than men do. One lass I'd been seeing for at least a couple of months had absolutely no idea I was circumcised despite having had my penis in her mouth dozens and dozens of times. Her excuse? "I just didn't really pay that much attention". Well, thanks for that?

While I could probably build a 100% accurate full colour 3D model of every vagina I've ever been in contact with most lasses seem to lump knobs into three rough categories: Micropenis, Ouch, and Everything Else. What this means is that I think most lasses probably aren't shagging away thinking "yeah this guy is definitely packing half an inch less than that other lad", probably can't tell the difference in an inch or two anyway, and if your old chap doesn't fit into the Micropenis or Ouch categories then it's probably entirely forgettable, just another faceless shaft on the cock carousel.

Either that or I've just been hanging out on the wrong side of the tracks all my life.
>> No. 4139 Anonymous
14th April 2017
Friday 1:42 am
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FFS measure it.


>> No. 405839 Anonymous
19th October 2016
Wednesday 2:31 pm
/b/405839 Mid-week thread
Mid-week thread?

Mid-week thread.

What are you lot up to?
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>> No. 409614 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 7:28 pm
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Buses don't have shoulders.
>> No. 409615 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 7:29 pm
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Congrats lad. The problem with this country is that there aren't nearly enough stubborn buggers left any more.

My Grandad was the stubbornest bugger your were ever likely to meet (it helps that he was Scottish) and I always strive to be as stubborn (but slightly less buggery) as he was.
>> No. 409619 Anonymous
13th April 2017
Thursday 3:15 pm
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I don't know. Being stubborn is one reason why my life is such an /emo/ mess.

I might open up an emo thread one of these days to explain.
>> No. 409620 Anonymous
13th April 2017
Thursday 4:49 pm
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Do it, you'll feel better for spilling your guts.
>> No. 409621 Anonymous
13th April 2017
Thursday 5:59 pm
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98% of weight now at a friends and a trolley down to the new place to move everything over the weekend. Trolley because I don't actually live in the UK anymore.

But yeah, 75% of shit done, because I am stubborn, rather than a pussy. This has set be back 2 quid so far. 4 quid for the taxi, makes a princely total of 6 quid to move house.


>> No. 6587 Anonymous
8th April 2017
Saturday 11:01 pm
/lit/6587 Immunology
I'm looking for a book about the human immune system, could any of you lads recommend one? I'm a beginner with no formal training what so ever.
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>> No. 6589 Anonymous
9th April 2017
Sunday 3:14 am
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Who do I call if I have Djinn problem? Is there a halal equivalent of Ghostbusters?
>> No. 6590 Anonymous
9th April 2017
Sunday 7:23 am
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Immunology is a complex topic. Unless you took A-levels in chemistry and biology fairly recently, you're unlikely to learn much from a typical undergraduate immunology textbook. An introductory course in biology from Coursera or Khan Academy might be a good start; if you're really keen, you could do A-levels or an Access to HE course at your local FE college.
>> No. 6591 Anonymous
9th April 2017
Sunday 10:57 am
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Oh do piss off you idiot.
>> No. 6592 Anonymous
9th April 2017
Sunday 3:13 pm
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Immunology looks fascinating and incredibly complex. As the previous poster pointed out, if you have no formal training you're probably going to be reading gibberish. Hell, I have a Chemistry A-level and a degree in Physics (he wrote smugly) and I doubt I'd get much of what I was reading, at least at the level where I wasn't just repeating things by rote.

If you really want to study immunology, which is a highly admirable ambition, I'd recommend first studying chemistry at an adult education college then seeing what mature student courses are available. From what I understand mature students are sought after since they're genuinely pursuing a dream as opposed to wandering into x subject since they assume uni is what they should do at that age.

Either way I wish you all the best m7.
>> No. 6593 Anonymous
13th April 2017
Thursday 3:32 pm
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I'd recommend "Biology: The Science of Life" by Robert A. Wallace, if you can find it. It's just a general biology textbook, but well written and a good introduction.

After that, I have no idea. I used this one:

It will be rough going no matter what. You basically have to memorize an alphabet soup of enzymes and ligands. Worse, everything is unintuitively named because it was discovered by accident or for some reason unrelated to its function. For example, the enzyme "XP" is named after the disease it causes, Xeroderma Pigmentosa, rather than its function (DNA repair).

t. used to work in the immunology department at MIT.


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>> No. 57845 Ambulancelad
10th April 2017
Monday 4:35 pm
/iq/57845 3 guys are hiking through the woods when they find a lamp.
One of them picks it up, rubs it, and out pops a Genie.
It booms "You have finally freed me after all these years, so I'll grant each one of you 3 wishes." The first guy immediately blurts out "I want a billion dollars." POOF, he's holding a printout that shows his account balance is now in fact 1,000,000,003.50
The second man thinks for a bit, then says "I want to be the richest man alive." POOF, he's holding papers showing his net worth is now well over 100 billion.
The third guy thinks even longer about his wish, then says "I want my left arm to rotate clockwise for the rest of my life." POOF, his arm starts rotating.
The Genie tells them it's time for their second wish.
First guy says: "I want to be married to the most beautiful woman on earth." POOF, a stunning beauty wraps herself around his arm.
Second guy says "I want to be good-looking and charismatic, so I can have every girl I want." POOF, his looks change and the first guy's wife immediately starts flirting with him.
Third guy says "I want my right arm to rotate counter-clockwise until I die." POOF, now both his arms are rotating, in opposite directions.
The genie tells them to think very carefully about their third wish.
First guy does, and after a while says "I never want to become sick or injured, I want to stay healthy until I die." POOF, his complexion improves, his acne is gone and his knees don't bother him any more.
Second guy says "I never want to grow old. I want to stay 29 forever." POOF, he looks younger already.
Third guy smiles triumphantly and says "My last wish is for my head to nod back and forth." POOF, he's now nodding his head and still flailing his arms around.
The genie wishes them good luck, disappears, and the men soon go their separate ways.

Many years later they meet again and chat about how things have been going. First guy is ecstatic: "I've invested the money and multiplied it many times over, so me and my family will be among the richest of the rich pretty much forever. My wife is a freak in the sheets, and I've never gotten so much as a cold in all these years." Second guy smiles and says "Well, I built charities worldwide with a fraction of my wealth, I'm still the richest guy alive and also revered for my good deeds. I haven't aged a day since we last met, and yes, your wife is pretty wild in bed."
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>> No. 57847 R4GE
11th April 2017
Tuesday 2:05 am
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Ah brilliant. Reminds me of the jokes I used to swap as a kid. Cheers for that.
>> No. 57848 Samefag
11th April 2017
Tuesday 2:36 am
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A man goes to join an order of monks.

The head Monk says to the man "This is a silent order. You will only be allowed to speak once, every 15 years."

The man says "Ok" and so begins his time with the silent order.

15 years pass and the man is sitting in the refectory when the head monk approaches and says to the man "It has been fifteen years. What would you like to say brother?".

The man responds, "The porridge could do with a little more sugar." The head monk nods in acknowledgement and walks away.

Another 15 years pass and the head monk finds the man in the dormitory and says "Brother, it has been another 15 years. What is it that you wish to say?".

"The bed sheets are a bit thin." Replies the man. Again the head monk nods in acknowledgement.

Yet another 15 years pass and the head monk sees the man and asks "15 years have passed. Have you anything to say?".
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>> No. 57849 Samefag
11th April 2017
Tuesday 4:02 pm
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>> No. 57850 Ambulancelad
12th April 2017
Wednesday 8:36 pm
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Don't get it. Unless it's about Jews and money, in which case yawn.
>> No. 57851 Auntiefucker
12th April 2017
Wednesday 9:33 pm
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>> No. 24665 Anonymous
28th March 2017
Tuesday 7:03 pm
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Lately I've been waking up in the middle of night and feeling a strange sense of unease, the willies. I am scared of something but am unable to define what it is.

My initial assumption was nightmares but last night I could recall a normal dream when I awoke. This is annoying because I'm a grown man but find that some nights I have to switch on my bedside lamp to get back to sleep.

Google seems to come out with all sorts of things that don't seem to apply. There are no adult worries that comes to mind when I'm like this (much as I have them) and it isn't like a panic attack.

Any ideas lads? It isn't a one-time occurrence but seems to be getting more common.
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>> No. 24776 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 10:07 pm
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I should mention that making a small campfire gives you a primal sense of security that no animal will disturb. It's technically illegal in England and Wales so whilst I am emphatically and absolutely not encouraging you to make one, in my opinion anyone who could burn down and English, let alone Welsh forest at midnight deserves a Nobel prize. Though it's legal in Scotland, so I personally recommend clearing a circle in the undergrowth with your boots at least six feet across, digging a small pit then a trench leading away from it a foot or so. Cover all but the last few inches of said trench with a few twigs to make a roof and cover with soil, now you have a decent airflow for your fire from underneath. Use your knife, which you have since you're outdoors in the woods at night and not a mug, to cut a few nearby branches about 2 inches thick or so, stick them over the pit before piling on twigs, some tinder and in half an hour or so you'll have a nice cosy fire. Recommend doing this in woodland where nobody nearby with a mansion will see you. There are few things more heartwarming than roasting sausages on the end of a knife by a fire of your own making while looking at the stars on a cold, dry night while owls hoot around you. Everyone should do it at least once.

Shame becoming a Scout leader these days is like changing your name to Jimmy Saville and expecting not to get funny looks.
>> No. 24778 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 10:24 pm
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Yes mate, lighting a fire then making yourself a silhouette against it with nothing but the things in the dark you can't see coming behind you is sure to reassure people. Why not adjust your eyes to only seeing things that're really close and in one specific direction?

I'm used to walking a lot in the pitch black, it doesn't really bother me. After a while you get used to feeling where the road is going by the slope of it, but one night the same car went back and forth a few times then pulled in ahead of me where I had to walk into the woods, at around 2am. I had to creep through half a mile of woodland with no lights. The supernatural's easy, you can just make up whatever to protect yourself and feel better. Humans, though. They're unpredictable.
>> No. 24779 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 11:19 pm
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About ten years ago, I had a bit of a mental health/insomnia vicious cycle. I was too anxious to sleep and the sleep deprivation made my anxiety worse. For whatever reason, I got really into night running. I had this massive head torch that was like the headlight on a motorbike. I'd get the last train out to Stalybridge, run laps of the peaks and get the first train back in the morning.

It was a spectacularly stupid thing to do, especially during the winter. I had no spare clothing, no survival gear, no phone - just a head torch, some spare batteries and a couple of drinks bottles. Sometimes I'd stand at the top of a hill, turn off my torch and look out into the inky darkness. It was so quiet, so still, so lonely up there. I looked down at the stars below, the dirty orange constellations of street lights. I thought about all the people down there, sleeping soundly in their warm beds.

I'd hear things rustling in the gorse or see a flicker in the shadows, but there was nothing to do but keep running. With every footstep I imagined breaking my ankle, I imagined tumbling down the slope, I imagined freezing to death on that lonely hillside. Oddly, I almost felt safe up there. I was terrified, but at least I was afraid of something real. The adrenaline of fear just melted into the runner's high; fight-or-flight means nothing when you're already flying.
>> No. 24780 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 11:28 am
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It's really worth reading the Bible for some of the imagery. Those hovering eyeball monsters and dragons and wasp soldiers in Revelations are amazing.
>> No. 24781 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 7:59 pm
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True, but with a fire you have warmth, cosiness and a means to make a cuppa. Do I really need to elaborate on why having a campfire on a freezing cold night in the woods is nice? And if noises in the background are enough to give you the heeby-jeebies then man up. At worst it's a badger snuffling around.


>> No. 408833 Anonymous
3rd March 2017
Friday 7:10 pm
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I've been wondering about the age demographics on .gs as we seem to be older and more cantankerous fellows than the average imageboard circle.

I can't remember if there has been a poll done before but I'm sure we have all aged since any previous one. Would you mind answering this so we can all learn something?
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>> No. 409602 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 7:00 pm
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Ugh, I managed 4 hours sleep last night so apologies for an incomprehensible first sentence. I was comparing myself to the 19 year-old me, who likely would've proofread his post before making such an egregious error. I'll shuffle off now.
>> No. 409609 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 2:15 pm
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I am exactly 25, and I've been coming here since at least 2010. In fact some of my old posts still linger, and I cringe reading ny teenlad writings.
>> No. 409610 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 2:29 pm
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I often cringe shortly after pressing submit.
>> No. 409613 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 7:20 pm
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I often start cringing halfway through the middle of a sentence. Britfa is full of the ghosts of the hundreds of posts I could never bring myself to submit.
>> No. 409616 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 7:48 pm
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I sometimes find myself cringing before I submit a post. But then I press submit anyway because sharing is caring. Case-in-point ...


>> No. 12260 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 12:57 am
/nom/12260 Wimpy still exists
It's pretty shit.
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>> No. 12292 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 11:43 pm
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hmm, it displays fine for me on /*/ but when I click on the thread it gains an  immediately preceding it.
>> No. 12293 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 12:52 am
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Are you of the generation who understands what it's meant to be, even if your browser doesn't interpret it correctly, or are you of the generation who needs to complain that it's not perfect?
>> No. 12294 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 2:10 am
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I imagine you live in a house where the hot water cuts out about half way into filling a bath, only half the light bulbs work. And you haven't got around to fixing the upstairs toilet yet, but don't worry it can wait another 3 years it isn't going anywhere, you can just use the downstairs.

How dare the young people expect things to work the way they are supposed to, privileged little shits.
>> No. 12296 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 4:56 pm
12296 sage

>or are you of the generation who needs to complain that it's not perfect?

I felt that to be a dig at older people. In my experience, they seem to cause more fuss. But I'll lend you to this, that it's rather subjective and not really about age-defined 'generations'.
>> No. 12297 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 7:16 pm
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I don't think it's so much that we're being taken advantage of, it's more that it's fucking expensive to run a business in this country. Everything from rent, to business rates, to wages, to the cost of raw ingredients makes the sort of food they sell in the US impossible here.

Running costs for a local sarnie shop are as cheap as they get, but you're still lucky to get more than 3 wafer thin rashers of bacon on your bookers wholesale bap.


>> No. 12487 Anonymous
7th April 2017
Friday 10:36 am
/news/12487 US Bombs Assad

>The US military has launched a cruise missile attack on a Syrian airfield in response to the Assad regime’s use of chemical weapons this week, marking the first time the US has become a direct combatant against the Syrian regime.

>Though Trump lacked congressional and international authorisation for the strike, prominent US politicians immediately gave him political cover.

>For years, defense analysts have warned the US against attacking Assad without a plan for what it seeks to achieve or what a post-Assad Syria might look like.

And the Russian's are none too happy.

>Under the memorandum, signed after Russia launched an air campaign in Syria in September 2015, Russia and the US had exchanged information about their flights to avoid incidents in the crowded skies over Syria — where Russia has several dozen warplanes and batteries of air-defense missiles.
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>> No. 12519 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 4:48 pm
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>saying another world leader is literally worse than Hitler.
As opposed to figuratively worse than Hitler?
>> No. 12520 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 5:03 pm
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First day on the Internet, grandad?
>> No. 12521 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 5:06 pm
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You don't see why such a vague value judgement statement is weirder to qualify with literally/figuratively, as opposed to saying "literally is Hitler" or something along those lines?
>> No. 12522 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 5:22 pm
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It's a shit internet meme. It's not supposed to make sense.
>> No. 12523 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 7:07 pm
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I'm getting really fed up of Syria to be honest.

It's getting like that shit radio station your boring normal colleagues put on at work. The one where you've already heard Human by Rag'n'Bone Man once before morning coffee, and then twice more by your afternoon fag break.

It's just all starting to sound the same.


irish man abroad.png
>> No. 409275 Anonymous
26th March 2017
Sunday 6:35 pm
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As a strong independent Irishman who don't need no imperial measurements or royal family, would I be welcome on this board?
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>> No. 409484 Anonymous
7th April 2017
Friday 10:47 am
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Only in Ireland.
>> No. 409485 Anonymous
7th April 2017
Friday 12:57 pm
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Not really.
>> No. 409570 Anonymous
8th April 2017
Saturday 10:29 pm
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>“He could drink any man under the table,” she said. But could he drink 30? “Definitely.”

>30 Pints or More a Day

>Thirty pints is a huge quantity of alcohol. But if the stories are to be believed, it’s hardly the record for a Smithfield cattleman.

>“Forty or fifty” pints would be an impressive tally in the eyes of Mick Kavanagh, who was enjoying a pint of stout over a copy of the Herald in Hynes’s.

>He’s seen it done, he says. “These would be men who died in their forties,” he said.

What to say...
>> No. 409608 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 12:41 pm
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I've known guys like this growing up in Kerry in the 80s, they could drink all day, 30 or more pints no problem. When I went back down there in my 20s they were all either dead or looked 70 at the age of 55
>> No. 409611 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 5:23 pm
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One of my dad's cousins was a bad alcoholic. Started drinking in his youth, and in his mid 50s, he was put in a care home because he was mentally unable to function on his own anmyore. He developed Alzheimer's at a relatively early age, and died of liver cancer a few years later. Sad case, really. The alcohol just destroyed his life. He was married twice in his younger years, when his alcoholism wasn't as debilitating, but both his ex wives and their children refused to keep in regular contact with him. My dad was one of the few people who stuck by him, because they had been quite close ever since they were little.


>> No. 5103 Anonymous
22nd September 2011
Thursday 9:56 pm
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>> No. 24954 Anonymous
4th February 2017
Saturday 12:18 am
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Too soon, m7.
>> No. 24971 Anonymous
7th February 2017
Tuesday 8:59 am
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Twice in the past week or so I've nearly gone into the back of cars on the M1 because they've decided that indicating means they can pull in front of me, despite the fact they were only doing about 50/60 whilst I'm doing 70 and they were barely in front of me.
>> No. 25163 Anonymous
13th March 2017
Monday 5:03 pm
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I've just had a couple of new tyres fitted on my car. I was there about 50 minutes. I think the actual work took him not even a tenth of that. The rest of the time he was on his phone chatting.
>> No. 25164 Anonymous
13th March 2017
Monday 5:33 pm
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Why did you not ask him if he's finished? It takes like 10 minutes to change two tyres, if that.

I recommend
>> No. 25256 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 4:42 pm
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I've been to visit relatives in Hull today. I'd forgotten people there do not drive in bus lanes when they're not in operation and glare at you like you're a mad undertaking maniac.


>> No. 12088 Anonymous
2nd September 2016
Friday 12:54 am
/nom/12088 Why am I adding the ingredients I'm adding? Specifically for this dish.
I added too much salt to my lemon sauce. I know that because it tastes of salt. Went about 600ml water, 400g sugar, lots of lemon zest and peel, 100 ml corn starch and then about 80g salt. I was trying to follow an amalgamation of a google recipe and the recipe on a bottle of lemon sauce I got. It seemed on point at the time but now it tastes way salty. I've been adding more water and some lemon juice but in the back of my head I know it's going to simmer away and leave the salt. So I've left it for now, will the salt condense at the bottom, or is the corn starch a binding agent of some kind?

Also, when breading chicken, I was told flour, drizzle in beaten salted egg, and then cover in breadcrumbs. This kind of works but I'm not sure why I'm doing these things. Why do I need flour and egg to make the chicken sticky enough for breadcrumbs? Why can't I just put flour, egg, and breadcrumbs in a bowl and roll it about?

How do the takeaways do lemon chicken?
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>> No. 12283 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 6:27 pm
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>I suspect a lot of chinese takeaways buy a wholesale lemon sauce or even a frozen lemon chicken, because it always seems the same.
Most cheap Chinese takeouts buy their lemon chicken, and the rest of their stuff, wholesale frozen in large quantities. Same deal with most of the dishes from cheap Indian takeouts (and with pretty much everything in any kebab shop) - which is why they all taste more or less the same as each other. Some may try and hide it by adding a few odds and ends of their own, or mixing up sauce bases etc, and if you're in London or on curry mile then it's a different story, but as a general rule if you're going with a cheap takeout in a town in Britain then all of their stuff will have come straight out of a tub, which came out of a freezer, which came from a giant wholesale conglomerate syndicated all across the UK. Very few will be carefully dusting lemon chicken by hand and leaving it to season in the back, because they can't afford the labour/time/wastage costs associated with that. You'll know the ones that are preparing their own stuff, because their prices will typically be twice as high.

(I know I'm quoting an old post, blame >>12281.)
>> No. 12284 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 7:07 pm
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Sadly true, though sometimes nicely familiar. For genuine Chinese food you either have to find a London joint with a no reservation policy filled to the gills with tattooed beardy types or keep a beady eye out for where the Chinese students at your nearest uni tend to frequent. They won't recognise or touch the stuff at most of our supposedly Chinese restaurants.

Also has anyone, anywhere, ever ordered one of the mysterious omelette dishes they have in what they call the English section of the menu? I've always been intrigued but never enough to spend money on it. Not to mention I'd probably get food poisoning.
>> No. 12285 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 7:17 pm
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My local Indian is a 10ft by 6ft extension on the side of a slightly dodgy pub, and they have a metal shed just outside they use to store their ingredients in.
I sort of find it hard to believe that they aren't just shipping everything in frozen, but it is honestly the best Indian takeaway I've ever ordered from, it's comparable to the quality of food you get if you dine-in at renowned restaurants in Birminghams balti belt. The rest of the reviews on just-eat agree with me too.
I've also seen them unloading vegetables off a van sometimes which is a good sign, even if they are sneaking in some frozen chicken when no-ones looking.

>And I've just realised the abject idiocy of describing Himalayan salt as 'sea salt'. Old habits die hard.

Well it was in the sea once.
so was my piss
>> No. 12288 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 7:46 pm
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There are exceptions. There's an Indian near me who unquestionably cook their own stuff from scratch (and it's fantastic), but they're vegetarian so there's a lot of "meat problems" there that they don't have to deal with, and that's reflected in their price. You might just have got lucky and found a place with an old Indian lass with a bindi who sweats away in the kitchen every day of the week doing it all by the recipes her mother's mother passed down. Lucky you.

>keep a beady eye out for where the Chinese students at your nearest uni tend to frequent.
Yeah, or similarly ask an Indian/Pakİstani taxi driver to drive you to where he goes for dinner, as I think someone on here tipped me off to many years ago. As a rule of thumb, if the clientele of the place you're eating in match the country represented, you're probably in for a good meal.
>> No. 12295 Anonymous
12th April 2017
Wednesday 6:09 am
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>Yeah, or similarly ask an Indian/Pakİstani taxi driver to drive you to where he goes for dinner,


When I was at uni I ended up moving into a street abutting the main drag. Of all the take-outs there were two that looked fucking shite. One a Mexican, one Turkish. But I noticed that they were rammed with Spanish and Turks respectively, every hour they were open.

Fuck me that food was goood and cheap.


>> No. 409287 Anonymous
28th March 2017
Tuesday 6:22 pm
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Well aren't you lads a bunch of wisecracking chucklefucks?

You'll never guess who I saw today? The lad from the Oak Furnitureland adverts. You know, Green the mod in real life. So I goes up to "Green" and I drop a few subtle Britfa links. You know the sort of thing, ambulancelad, bike thief, crab killer. Only he isn't picking up on these hints. Not to worry I thinks, so I try some of the more old school things with all the subtlety of a brick to the face.

"That's a fine beast, have you knotted it yet?"

Nothing. Actually, worse than nothing. He starts looking at me as if I'm some sort of fruitloop or sex pest. This lad isn't Green at all, is he? This is someone's idea of an UTTERLY HILARIOUS JOKE, isn't it? Top notch bantz, lads. Top notch. You've made me look a right fool in front of a real person.
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>> No. 409355 Anonymous
1st April 2017
Saturday 3:37 pm
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That wouldn't surprise me in the slightest.
>> No. 409386 Anonymous
2nd April 2017
Sunday 3:19 pm
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On the subject of knotting, it's more complicated than you might think. Just keep your hands clear.
>> No. 409599 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 1:37 pm
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I didn't realise that men who enjoy watching dogs fuck women actually fuck the woman afterwards, whilst she'll be full of doggy cum.

A female pensioner who was filmed having sex with dogs has been spared jail by a judge. Carol Bowditch, 64, had sex with a St Bernard, a black labrador and an Alsatian claiming later she did not realise that it was illegal.

Her activities were exposed as a result of an RAF Police investigation which centred on a man identified as organising a bizarre sex party . Owners watched their dogs having sex with women, who then had sex with the men. Details of the event were later posted on an internet forum specialising in bestiality.

"Included was an eight minute and 59 seconds video of Mrs Bowditch engaging in vaginal and oral sex with a St Bernard dog named Oscar."
>> No. 409600 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 6:05 pm
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I have no words. Except that people really are strange.

Oh, and incidentally before I wrote 'strange' my autocorrect suggested the words 'nuts', 'awesome' and 'off'. Which one is more accurate?
>> No. 409603 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 7:02 pm
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Fair play to her, I wouldn't have the nerve.


>> No. 12184 Anonymous
30th December 2016
Friday 1:56 am
/nom/12184 Beef Jerky
I got one of these for christmas so I made some beef jerky.
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>> No. 12273 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 1:28 pm
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Any idea how much power these things use?
>> No. 12275 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 1:48 pm
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The one pictured is rated at 600W, which is about 1/3rd of a regular kettle, if you're worried about it overloading your wiring. It won't be at that constantly, probably just at the start of the cycle, but let's assume it's a constant 600W just for starters: at ~12p/kWh that'd work out at ~70p per ten hours (rough maths), but I'd imagine it'd be about a tenth of that if it decreases the wattage as much as I'd expect it to. In other words, fuck all.
>> No. 12276 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 2:11 pm
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Yeah the instruction booklet says the cost of running it starts at about 3p an hour or something.

Good timing, I just started another load today. A butcher just opened up in my local corner shop and they were happy to slice the meat for me, so I have 8 plate sized pieces of beef on the go, rather than the chips I shaved off frozen bits of whatever was cheapest at Sainsburies.

Similar marinade, more maggi wurze than soy sauce and no chillies, but I dry-fried the szechuan peppers before grinding them up, it's a lot more powdery.
>> No. 12277 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 2:29 pm
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Have you tried using tamari instead of soy sauce? I have a feeling it'd work well with one of these; more umami.
>> No. 12279 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 2:46 pm
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No. I'll have a look for it next time I'm at an Asian supermarket.


>> ID: e51004 No. 14147 Anonymous
9th April 2017
Sunday 5:17 pm

ID: e51004
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Could we have one of those 'reverse-reply' features for posts? So we can see who's replied to the post, rather than just who is replying. I don't know what to call it.
It's be much easier to keep track of conversations in some of those longer threads.
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>> ID: d80efc No. 14156 Anonymous
10th April 2017
Monday 10:35 pm

ID: d80efc
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Perhaps a collapsible table then? Something which will conceal the ugliness until interrogated. Like a Martian hiding a psychic mutant resistant leader on their belly.
>> ID: ec74d0 No. 14157 Anonymous
10th April 2017
Monday 11:06 pm

ID: ec74d0
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That's posters, I don't have access to how many people are lurking.
I don't feel strongly about it one way or another, but it's not really my call anyway. These other minor chans seem to be having minor spam conniptions to lure in more posters but it's not like there's some untapped mass of people suited to this environment just waiting to find it.
>> ID: f1e43d No. 14159 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 12:04 am

ID: f1e43d
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I always thought there was a quasi philosophical reason for not advertising this place, but I'd not be adverse to it. But honestly we'd probably just annoy people, by 'inviting' them here with ads, then immediately banning them for their grammar.
>> ID: 7aac8f No. 14160 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 1:54 pm

ID: 7aac8f
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>run a small scale advertising campaign?
" the number one destination for all you arse-pissers and auntie-fuckers out there"

We could see if 0891 50 50 50 is available these days and then put it up on the porn channels on Sky that nobody watches any more.

I should work in advertising.
>> ID: 7aac8f No. 14161 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 1:59 pm

ID: 7aac8f
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Occasionally someone makes a post on 4chan saying "go abroad and bring something back" with links to foreign chans, this one among them.

They don't last long.


>> No. 3825 Anonymous
2nd April 2017
Sunday 8:44 pm
/mph/3825 worst drivers
Who do you think the worst drivers on the road are?
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>> No. 3831 Anonymous
2nd April 2017
Sunday 10:08 pm
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What the fuck is a 'Vauxhaul'?
>> No. 3832 Anonymous
2nd April 2017
Sunday 11:38 pm
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African women, certainly.
>> No. 3833 Anonymous
4th April 2017
Tuesday 3:30 pm
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The worst drivers drive me round the bend. Sage for shit joke.
>> No. 3834 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 12:11 am
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The old joke about BMW drivers not using their indicators seems to be true, and I seem to get tailgated by Audis and white van men a lot.

The taxi drivers in West Yorkshire are aggressively bad drivers, and drive right up your arse too, especially at night.

As for stereotyping, mid thirties asian women drive like they're playing a turn based strategy game, mid fifties white women have terrible road rage while failing to follow basic rules of the road (I've seen my mother shout at someone for swerving because she cut them off) and old men tend to drive like they're 20 but have lost the reaction time.
>> No. 3835 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 1:37 pm
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>white van men
Having driven a white van in an old job, let me tell you, when you're in someone else's vehicle, on their petrol, with a big fucking motor under the hood, it's bloody tempting to floor it, especially if you're on a tight deadline. I managed to resist it for the most part, but the pressure might've got to me if I'd been on a commission.

I'll throw in a vote for mums with young kids. It's alright dear, you stop right there at the exit of Tesco to lecture your progeny at length - we'll all just sit and wait.


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