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>> No. 404457 Anonymous
11th August 2016
Thursday 10:36 pm
If you want to discuss krautchan being down or the fact that you're foreign or whatever else it is you lot talk about, do it on >>/zoo/, which is our /int/ board.

You're welcome to post on our other boards but please have the good grace not to draw attention to the fact that you're not British unless it's actually relevant.
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>> No. 404465 Anonymous
12th August 2016
Friday 5:39 pm
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>> No. 404643 Anonymous
22nd August 2016
Monday 8:50 pm
404643 The .gs time capsule.
Heres an idea lads. Post any .gs related content from the last few years so we can asemble a time capsule of sorts. I've chosen a classic to start us off.
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>> No. 404790 Anonymous
24th August 2016
Wednesday 11:04 pm
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Britchan was just British tinted 4chan.. gs is just office conversation really.
>> No. 404793 Anonymous
24th August 2016
Wednesday 11:46 pm
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Just found another one
>> No. 404795 Anonymous
25th August 2016
Thursday 12:08 am
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>> No. 404799 Anonymous
25th August 2016
Thursday 11:00 am
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Sure, if you work in an office where incest, dolphin rape and noncing are the primary topics of conversation.
>> No. 404802 Anonymous
25th August 2016
Thursday 11:47 am
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The other ARE SI.

>> No. 404466 Anonymous
12th August 2016
Friday 8:44 pm
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Weekend thread? Weekend thread.

These lady weightlifters are giving me a right stonk on.
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>> No. 404797 Anonymous
25th August 2016
Thursday 3:03 am
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Like the other lads have said, get cracking on it.

Its not impossible just make sure you do a decent plan and stick with it. Read this webpage as its got some decent tips:

Yeah you need to email your supervisor and consider speaking to your doctor about stress and trouble sleeping so you have a medical reason on record -you may be able to extend the deadline so these avenues are worth chasing.

I'm writing around 15k words for the 1st to finish my MRes (its a personal goal for a draft) so you're not entirely alone. Getting your topic down could be difficult so focus on a specific area and if you run short of wordcount put into your conclusion that X,Y,Z areas have been missed due to the constraints of your research.

I wrote my undergraduate dissertation in 2 weeks and got something in the mid-60s. It damn near killed me too but working close to a deadline isn't going to fuck you too much if you do a decent amount of planning.
>> No. 404798 Anonymous
25th August 2016
Thursday 3:44 am
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There's plenty of stories in my uni area about people who've managed to complete a dissertation in a day. It's simply not possible to complete one and have a passing grade in one day. They're chatting shit. It's only possible if there's been extensive planning and all that remains is to write down it all.

I have done assignments that contain 4000+ words in a day before and got respectable marks for it. Dissertations on the other hand isn't the length that kills you it's the planning. It's when you're writing your lit review to completion and you realise that you've only written 2500 words and you think you'll never reach your target of roughly 15k at this pace. My undergrad dissertation had an issue in that I hadn't performed my primary research and due to my shite planning I had to do it two weeks before the deadline. Which meant a good chunk of my dissertation had to be complete in that time. I spent most of my time in those total of three weeks living in the library only going home to sleep.

In the end I submitted it online 15 minutes before the deadline. Luckily my uni had made it so you submit it online first and you had 3 days to print and bind two copies for physical submission. There was plenty of non-important stuff missing like acknowledgements in it too.

The fact I haven't made the progress I wanted in my Msc thesis is making me anxious even if it is in for December.
>> No. 404801 Anonymous
25th August 2016
Thursday 11:29 am
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>I have done assignments that contain 4000+ words in a day before and got respectable marks for it.

I did a fifteen-page paper in two and a half days once, from scratch without preparation.

It was for this one class/seminar, and I was supposed to give my presentation Wednesday afternoon. On Monday morning, I ran into the professor on the stairs, and he said, "Ah, it's you... well, I'm looking forward to hearing your presentation on Wednesday".

And I thought, oh shit. I thought my paper wasn't due until two weeks after that. So I skipped classes, went to the library, and spent the rest of the day there compiling sources. And then on Wednesday morning, I actually had a paper ready. I thought it was complete shit, but when I was done with my presentation, the professor leafed through my handout one more time, and then said, "Very well done. Everybody, THIS is how I want a paper done in this class!"
>> No. 404803 Anonymous
25th August 2016
Thursday 11:54 am
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Yup. I did two from scratch in 17 hours. I do not advise it, either physically or mentally, and I definitely was not celebrating with friends after handing them in, but those were two cracking dissertations.

You really do need to get on it lad. Ma I advise spending a full day planning and then hit the writing?
>> No. 404804 Anonymous
25th August 2016
Thursday 1:51 pm
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I've decided to accept the late penalty of 10% so now I have to send it off by next Monday.

>> No. 364298 Anonymous
14th November 2013
Thursday 4:47 pm
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ITT: Weird dreams you've had lately.

I actually dreamed last night that I was in Australia, visiting the two blokes from the Foster's adverts in their beach hut. Sure enough, they gave me a Foster's, and I said "cheers, guys"... and then one of them said to me "oh no mayt, we don't say cheers heere. We say 'You little ripper!'"

Quite bizarre... has this dream got any deeper meaning, or have I just been watching too much telly lately?
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>> No. 404337 Anonymous
1st August 2016
Monday 12:42 pm
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Nein, that's not me.
>> No. 404758 Anonymous
24th August 2016
Wednesday 7:03 am
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For some reason Britain First had erected a monument in a local park, although it looked more like a tomb than anything. Everyone used to spit when they went past it. Jayda was in the park and they were celebrating because they'd won a seat in the council elections. I want to give her one so I agreed to help her cook the celebratory meal, which was Findus crispy pancakes and she'd been left in charge because apparently nobody else in Britain First knew how to cook them properly. We flirted but I woke up before I could give her one.
>> No. 404773 Anonymous
24th August 2016
Wednesday 7:05 pm
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>> No. 404776 Anonymous
24th August 2016
Wednesday 7:53 pm
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>> No. 404800 Anonymous
25th August 2016
Thursday 11:02 am
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You realise she only wants sex with black men?

>> No. 404746 Anonymous
23rd August 2016
Tuesday 10:58 pm
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If you were a farmer how easy would it be to kill someone and hide the body without it ever being found? There'd be an awful lot of private land to dispose it on.
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>> No. 404755 Anonymous
24th August 2016
Wednesday 12:16 am
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I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs.
>> No. 404756 Anonymous
24th August 2016
Wednesday 12:19 am
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Why is that better than feeding them to chickens?

Your best bet to dispose of a body without a trace is probably an industrial waste incinerator these days. They really just leave a pile of fine ashes.
>> No. 404757 Anonymous
24th August 2016
Wednesday 6:56 am
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My friend has chickens and she says they're utter bastards. A pigeon got in so they trapped it in the coop and took turns pecking at it until they'd taken all its feathers off. She's also been told if one of them is ever sick she must separate it from the others or they will kill it.
>> No. 404761 Anonymous
24th August 2016
Wednesday 12:20 pm
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Friends of my parents' had a farm when I was a little boy, and one day, I wanted to feed their chickens, and the farmer put a handful of chicken feed in my hand and told me to just gradually disperse it among the chickens.

As soon as the chickens realised that I had food, they started coming after me and pecking at my shins.

Kind of a scary experience when you're only six years old and chickens are still more than knee height for you. It's like being an adult and an angry swan coming after you (why do swans seem to be so easy to piss off anyway?).
>> No. 404772 Anonymous
24th August 2016
Wednesday 7:03 pm
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>(why do swans seem to be so easy to piss off anyway?).

They're nowhere near as bad as Canadian geese, the fecking immigrunts.

>> No. 404623 Anonymous
21st August 2016
Sunday 3:51 pm
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Someone kindly posted a lost item to me around a week ago. I think it was 2nd class. It's still not arrived yet.

Estimates say it should have been here by now, now I'm not sure what to do. It's not a valuable item per say, but it does contain several months worth of notes.

What's the longest you lads have been waiting around for the Royal Mail? What can I do if it doesn't arrive?
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>> No. 404632 Anonymous
21st August 2016
Sunday 6:15 pm
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Big Steve says hi. Check yo' messages.
>> No. 404633 Anonymous
21st August 2016
Sunday 6:43 pm
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>I should be compensated if it doesn't come by the end of the month
No, it'll be the sender that's entitled to compensation, not you.
>> No. 404639 Anonymous
21st August 2016
Sunday 10:03 pm
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If this is the case my mirth will be audible.
>> No. 404640 Anonymous
21st August 2016
Sunday 10:29 pm
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It was certainly the case last time I had an item I was expecting to receive go missing. IIRC they'll also want proof of posting, which means if it went into a roadside postbox then they're SOL.
>> No. 404641 Anonymous
22nd August 2016
Monday 5:19 pm
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I used to do some Western Union transfers a few years ago. I got a letter last winter saying one of the transfers was never collected and I should contact them to retrieve it. I instantly thought it was a scam but I looked into it and all the details they gave in the letter, and it checked out, so I called them and sent the details they wanted in February some time. Four months later they sent a reply email saying they needed something else, which I sent. I still haven't heard anything yet. Lazy fucks.

>> No. 404155 Anonymous
26th July 2016
Tuesday 5:48 am
404155 early morning gs
Why are you up at this hour?
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>> No. 404581 Anonymous
18th August 2016
Thursday 10:16 am
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New flat, no porn or HBO for weeks. Today the broadband lord texted around eight that all is good to go. After faffing with logins, router, maybe another filter, etc. I open the wall box to find this. Quick noncing here, please, wizards of wiring. It says NTL, which is pretty arcane. Any better way about it than haphazardly wiring up different combinations?
>> No. 404582 Anonymous
18th August 2016
Thursday 10:30 am
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That's not yours. Don't fuck with it. If you think that's the problem, call them out to fix it.
>> No. 404583 Anonymous
18th August 2016
Thursday 11:30 am
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This. Dont touch.
>> No. 404584 Anonymous
18th August 2016
Thursday 12:18 pm
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>>404583 >>404582

Cheers lads. After the red mist ebbed off, it was another plug on a random inside wall what did it. Now I know about ring-wires, my old laptop has modem testing software, and /shed/ is cleaned up a bit.
>> No. 404591 Anonymous
20th August 2016
Saturday 6:33 am
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I accidentally found the slash fiction writing account of a girl I had a bit of a crush on last year. This is amazing. I don't know why I'm so happy about it but I love it. It's very British. Characters played by American actors calling each other twats and men getting each other pregnant and the like.

>> No. 404366 Anonymous
4th August 2016
Thursday 7:57 pm
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Lads, there is a minor issue that I need help with.

My mum got a call from the council that the owner of the rented house they put her in about nine years ago sold it, and the new owner wants us out. They told her to pack her bags and fuck off in five days to another rented property 30 miles away. Basically, an eviction I suppose. Although, I thought they send you papers and give you a bit more time. They made an appointment with her tomorrow so that they can show her the house and all that.

I don't know what I am asking to be honest, but I don't know, can they tell you to fuck off within five days? Where can I get boxes to help with the moving? I looked at Big Yellow, and they all are so expensive. Do people put their clothes in the boxes too, or are they just for TVs and dinner plates? Should I call up the broadband providers and tell them about it? Are they going to charge me termination charges and whatever other charges? I work on a zero-hour contract through an agency and I'm afraid they will sack me if I ask for a few days off to help with all this. I just feel so overwhelmed. How do people manage to move around so much? What else do I need?

I'm sorry about all this lads. I don't know where else to turn.
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>> No. 404437 Anonymous
10th August 2016
Wednesday 9:29 pm
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It's hardly fundamental. If a landlord wants you out, you have to get out. You just get a longer window to do it in because you don't have the luxury of having the council organise where you'll be moving to.
>> No. 404439 Anonymous
10th August 2016
Wednesday 9:43 pm
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>If a landlord wants you out, you have to get out.
No, that's not how it works at all. A residential tenant is not subject to their landlord's whims.
>> No. 404444 Anonymous
10th August 2016
Wednesday 10:29 pm
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>It's hardly fundamental.
No, it is pretty fundamental.

>If a landlord wants you out, you have to get out.
No, that's not really true. As a licensee, if your licensor wants you out, you have to get out. As a tenant, if your landlord wants you out, and you're out of any fixed period or the landlord has grounds to evict you (from the list specified in statute) and they've served notice in the prescribed form and the prescribed period has elapsed, only then do you have to get out. It's very possible to be in a situation where the landlord wants you out but can't legally get you out.
>> No. 404585 Anonymous
18th August 2016
Thursday 9:56 pm
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Can a tenant change the locks to the property?
>> No. 404586 Anonymous
18th August 2016
Thursday 11:13 pm
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Yes. A tenancy is a limited transfer of ownership, and the general right to "quiet enjoyment" of one's own property applies. A tenancy agreement may not necessarily be able to prevent anyone changing the locks, but it is entirely allowed for it to say that the tenant has to provide a copy of the new key to the landlord (or agent).

>> No. 402260 Anonymous
3rd June 2016
Friday 11:27 am
402260 Weekend thread.
Got anything planned? Going away?

Tonight I'm having a quiet one in with pizza, wine, weed and an escort. I'm in my 40s and divorced.
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>> No. 404550 Anonymous
16th August 2016
Tuesday 2:16 pm
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My downstairs neighbour was on holiday when I moved in, so we hadn't met yet. Turns out she's quite hot- so naturally, I had to make things as awkward as possible at the soonest opportunity.

"Oh you just moved in upstairs? Pleased to meet you, bla bla, it's a nice day, you're welcome to use the garden area out back by the way."

"Oh cool, thanks, but I'm a creature of darkness. You might see me out there, but only to bask in the moonlight. And look through your window. While you're asleep."
>> No. 404567 Anonymous
17th August 2016
Wednesday 9:30 pm
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I took a shit on a plate to see how it would look.
>> No. 404568 Anonymous
17th August 2016
Wednesday 9:31 pm
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You couldn't just look at it in the bog?
>> No. 404570 Anonymous
17th August 2016
Wednesday 9:45 pm
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I wanted to see how it would look on a plate.
>> No. 404580 Anonymous
18th August 2016
Thursday 2:34 am
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Is that verbatim or are you just imagining how she interpreted it?

>> No. 404564 Anonymous
17th August 2016
Wednesday 9:24 pm
404564 websites
I need some new websites lamt8des. I've find myself using the internet a lot more this summer with a new laptop, after a couple of years using it rarely and briefly. I seem to be cycling through the same 8-10 websites and blogs, and googling random interests or youtubing/searching putlocker for documentaries or boxsets. So I ask you to link your frequented webpages, so I can broaden my e-horizons and learn how to argue that gravity doesn't exist and we all live on a flat earth. Thanks in advance.
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>> No. 404566 Anonymous
17th August 2016
Wednesday 9:28 pm
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>> No. 404569 Anonymous
17th August 2016
Wednesday 9:32 pm
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Deja vu, have we had a thread like this before? Was it someone requesting news aggregators or something?
>> No. 404571 Anonymous
17th August 2016
Wednesday 10:05 pm
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I started that. It was specifically for RSS news feeds. It may be pertinent for this thread, though: >>/news/10177

>> No. 404544 Anonymous
16th August 2016
Tuesday 11:09 am
404544 Posties
Lads, if I went to a post office and asked them to print something would they?
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>> No. 404548 Anonymous
16th August 2016
Tuesday 11:59 am
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Libraries are your best bet. You could try the Post Office, worth a shot I suppose, but you could very well be wasting your time there.
>> No. 404552 Anonymous
16th August 2016
Tuesday 4:10 pm
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They have photocopiers but i don't know any that print. They're missing a trick there.
>> No. 404553 Anonymous
16th August 2016
Tuesday 6:47 pm
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There's a slim chance that someone might have had the smart idea of fitting modern photocopiers which can print from USB sticks, but that might be a bit too much to hope for.
>> No. 404554 Anonymous
16th August 2016
Tuesday 6:50 pm
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Train stations would be another good one.
>> No. 404556 Anonymous
16th August 2016
Tuesday 8:09 pm
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I'd say Library first and then an internet cafe.

>> No. 404482 Anonymous
13th August 2016
Saturday 3:56 pm
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Lads, youtube are a bunch of cunts. Their copyright claims process is ass backwards.

I uploaded a piece of music I had written that day to my youtube channel, and before I had even hit publish it had a copyright claim against it by some company called "adrev", with a song title that when googled brought up no such song. I tried uploading it again to be sure and the same thing happened. Yep, obviously a bot, and one that has access to youtube videos BEFORE they are published. Wtf?

I was given the option to "share revenue" with these adrev cunts, which I rightly disputed. I am now waiting 30 days to hear back. Here's the fucked bit though. When I filed the dispute, youtube said my dispute claim was being sent to the copyright holder to see if it was valid or not.

So my claim, that this music I had written the same day as I uploaded it was mine, is being sent to the cunts who set up a bot to try and shyster poor unknown youtubers into giving them half their money! And if they disagree with my claim I will get a copyright strike! Three of those and the channel is shut down.

I am frankly, mad beyond words. I'll keep this thread updated with the results when I get them, but in the meantime has any of you ever come across this before? What did you do?
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>> No. 404539 Anonymous
15th August 2016
Monday 10:02 pm
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Not a word. Incontinent?
>> No. 404540 Anonymous
15th August 2016
Monday 10:06 pm
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Inca hate?
>> No. 404541 Anonymous
15th August 2016
Monday 10:33 pm
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Incohent, not incoherent.
>> No. 404542 Anonymous
15th August 2016
Monday 11:08 pm
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>> No. 404543 Anonymous
16th August 2016
Tuesday 2:01 am
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InshThe Great White Whale, brother.

>> No. 404503 Anonymous
14th August 2016
Sunday 12:29 am
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Some midget from TV died today, as did 157499 other people. RIP in pease
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>> No. 404506 Anonymous
14th August 2016
Sunday 9:28 am
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I could've done that. I can walk straight. I can bleep.
>> No. 404508 Anonymous
14th August 2016
Sunday 1:19 pm
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And any drunken cunt can shout the words to bohemian rhapsody, but that does not make them the next Freddie Mercury.
>> No. 404509 Anonymous
14th August 2016
Sunday 1:50 pm
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To be fair, there's a world of difference between cracking out a passable BoRhap and what was basically sitting in a tin can and fiddling with the lid every now and then.
>> No. 404510 Anonymous
14th August 2016
Sunday 2:23 pm
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You're right of course, I'd love to defend his performance as unique and multifaceted, simply on the principle that all art is unique and multifaceted, but it is as you describe and no audience is able to tell the difference between the actor in costume and a puppet.
>> No. 404511 Anonymous
14th August 2016
Sunday 2:37 pm
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This. Not everyone can do Freddie justice, but R2D2 could convincingly be portrayed by any volunteer at an Olympic opening ceremony.

>> No. 404414 Anonymous
9th August 2016
Tuesday 3:26 pm
404414 Existentialism and Brain Farts.
I thought we could have a bit of an existential sounding board thread where we could share and vent the carnival that goes on in all our heads sometimes.

I was reading a news paper article about the murder of a "popular" shopkeeper and how tragic it was. Does the fact he was popular make him more or less entitled to have his death described as tragic compared to say, a cantankerous old scrot who bursts children's footballs? Both would have been murdered. Both would have had to suffer the pain and fear of dying.

I suppose the impact one has on the local community would separate them, the fact that the shopkeeper was popular implies he had a thriving business within the community, whereas the Old Scrot was, perhaps, a pariah or a black sheep of sorts.

The way we compartmentalise death interests me greatly, but that's not what this thread is about. Air your own mental diarrhoea, lets get deep .gs.
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>> No. 404459 Anonymous
12th August 2016
Friday 12:26 am
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Anything like that is impossible at least until we understand the nature of consciousness, and in terms of the span of human technological advancement we've just about managed to stop banging rocks together. So you'll grow older and weaker and eventually die and that's just something we all have to come to terms with.
>> No. 404460 Anonymous
12th August 2016
Friday 6:58 am
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It does strike me as amazing sometimes that we manage to get anything done at all, when you consider how high maintenance the human body is. A constant supply of water, food, 1/3 of your time alive sleeping, and that's not even counting the stuff you need to actually feel good.
>> No. 404461 Anonymous
12th August 2016
Friday 7:07 am
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If your finger could travel through time and the rest of you couldn't, you'd just have a finger that would fall off and disappear and you'd be left with a little stub forever.
>> No. 404462 Anonymous
12th August 2016
Friday 9:27 am
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I don't know about you but all of me is travelling through time.
>> No. 404468 Anonymous
12th August 2016
Friday 9:31 pm
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I don't mind death. What I want is freedom from my body, for my mind to be anywhere it wants and have access to all the information on the net.

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