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>> No. 364298 Anonymous
14th November 2013
Thursday 4:47 pm
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ITT: Weird dreams you've had lately.

I actually dreamed last night that I was in Australia, visiting the two blokes from the Foster's adverts in their beach hut. Sure enough, they gave me a Foster's, and I said "cheers, guys"... and then one of them said to me "oh no mayt, we don't say cheers heere. We say 'You little ripper!'"

Quite bizarre... has this dream got any deeper meaning, or have I just been watching too much telly lately?
472 posts and 39 images omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 379697 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 8:02 pm
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In the gob.

>> No. 379698 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 8:12 pm
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>In the gob.

erm... technically, wouldn't that be called gobbing?
>> No. 379720 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 12:19 am
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>> No. 379727 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 1:11 am
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I had a dream about Kevin Eldon the other night too.

>> No. 379728 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 2:17 am
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He's in bloody everything!

>> No. 377938 Anonymous
4th July 2014
Friday 10:04 am
377938 WEEKEND 2.0
The other thread is reaching critical mass. Much like my stomach will be once I've consumed the huge amount of Thai Pork & Peanut Curry I plan on cooking tomorrow.

That and lying around, watching a few films, taking things easy, seeing no one.

What are you fa.gs doing?
441 posts and 24 images omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 379722 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 12:38 am
379722 spacer

The discount is still applied, it just doesn't show up on the screen. I think. I might be remembering it wrong as every time I go into a supermarket I want to kill myself and everyone else.
>> No. 379723 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 12:39 am
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If you can, order your food online. So much less hassle.
>> No. 379724 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 12:45 am
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Oh I do my proper shop online - I even started using Ocado, because even though it's always more expensive than the others, it has a thing where you press a button and it does you a basket based on what you usually buy. I just do that every single time now and order whatever shows up.

I only ever go into a brick and mortar shop to buy coffee or red bull or juice for work. And the whole process seems designed to piss me off. People standing in my way, the machines deciding they can't recognise an item, crying children, it's all just horror.
>> No. 379725 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 12:47 am
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> the machines deciding they can't recognise an item
"Unexpected item in baggage area"

Which is what I say when I try and slip it up the wrong-un to the Mrs.
>> No. 379726 Anonymous
29th July 2014
Tuesday 1:03 am
379726 spacer

That sentence encapsulates many a woman I involve in my life.

>> No. 379701 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 9:02 pm
379701 Looking through old stuff
According to the 4th May 1996 edition of The Beano, Noel Edmonds, Jeremy Beadle, Jimmy Cricket, some black bloke, and Jim Davidson were 'Jokers'.

Does anyone else keep stuff like this?
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>> No. 379702 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 9:09 pm
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Lenny be all "can you believe this honky right here", or something what a shit American comedian might say.

And I still have a large collection of Pokemon cards. I had a dream that I was in school and someone took a bunch of really good ones ;_; It was secondary too, so that was lame.
>> No. 379703 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 9:15 pm
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Plenty. I have old schoolwork from all ages, books, random tourist guff and such.
>> No. 379709 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 10:55 pm
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1996? Bloody hell. I recognise Joe King and still think of him as a 'new' strip.
>> No. 379711 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 11:15 pm
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I'd just like to say as an ex graffiti artist vandal, that the shadow on that S is fucking shocking.

>> No. 379623 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 3:19 am
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You have so much to be proud of, yo-
you know what:

...and as suddenly, I have a counter-argument of my own.
"This is what liberals are doing to European ethnicities, they want to flood us with non-whites (who're obviously of lesser biological quality)".
inb4 racist
you see, you can't even have a template-free thinking
just forget you're human, look at it from an objective perspective.
Okay okay, let's just move on, I understand the inconvenience it causes for you.
So what had I been about? Ah yes.
Also, forgive me my french ("loool?" No wait, that sounds too childish, for this board populated with mid 30 over, lonely wankers, so I'd have to appear alike and sound the same, I can't just utter "lol" like that)
I mean, English. "Forgive me my french" - is just a figure of speech, you see.
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.
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>> No. 379677 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 2:28 pm
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>> No. 379679 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 3:28 pm
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By that description, it would be the trilby that is the hat of shame. I think the septics refer to both types as fedoras.
>> No. 379682 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 4:40 pm
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Even if you were a decent bloke, I'd still have a gripe with you. To me it screams attention-seeking twat, as if your dull personality (maybe not), needs to be made up by wearing an oh-so quirky piece of headgear.

It's like those steampunk folk, very dull and tiring to be around so they try to make it up with their costumes.
>> No. 379683 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 4:48 pm
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It was originally an affectation I got when I was in a band a while back for the stage show, so I guess guilty as charged. The singer was a cross-dresser, so it was suggested I do something for image. I turned down the idea of cross dressing myself and said "erm...I'll wear a hat."

After that I just started wearing it outside the stage now and then. I like wearing it.
>> No. 379691 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 6:13 pm
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Fair enough, given the story I wouldn't think twice about it again.

>> No. 379086 Anonymous
19th July 2014
Saturday 5:04 pm
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What time of day do you class as dinner?

I want a specific window of time.
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>> No. 379678 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 2:34 pm
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To be fair to him - he's a bit hungry.
>> No. 379680 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 3:39 pm
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Careful not to mention things that irritate you here, it's worthy of a ban.

(A good day to you Sir!)
>> No. 379694 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 7:08 pm
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>> No. 379699 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 8:25 pm
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I really think posting "whoosh" should be an irritation worthy of a ban.

Moan over.
>> No. 379700 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 9:01 pm
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I had to check the thread because I thought I was losing my mind.

Quit parodying me :(

>> No. 379360 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 3:58 pm
379360 Beasts.
Share experiences of wild animal encounters. As always the more awkward and sad the annecdote, the better.
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>> No. 379463 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 5:12 pm
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Fuck the King Queen!

Speaking of wasps, a hive went after my childhood dog after he stuck his nose into their nest. Had to more or less pluck them out of his fur.
>> No. 379585 Anonymous
26th July 2014
Saturday 10:30 pm
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The same happened to me the other year with ground bees. Luckily they were all still immature and didn't sting, but as I was trying to flick them off him with a stick toy type thing some of them got on me. The brave little bastard started trying to get them off me despite being covered in them himself.
>> No. 379619 Anonymous
27th July 2014
Sunday 2:17 am
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I was in Massachusetts with my girlfriend on holiday a year ago and we came across a moose calf while checking out a monument. The mother watching from the woods wasn't amused that we approached her calf and came at us, we ran down the monument path and into a tennis court, by then it had lost interest.

While we're on the subject of wasps nests, when I was 15 there was a huge one in my uncles shed at the bottom of his garden, he dealt with it the way any sane British person would.

He slapped an adhesive roof patch on to the hole in the roof where they'd got in, sprayed foaming adhesive into the window cracks and then we threw 4 extra large enola gay smoke bombs through the shed door, ran back to the house, shut the door and then laughed as the smoke came billowing out of the gap under the shed door.

A few hours later when the smoke finally stopped we went to survey the damage, it was a massacre and everything in the shed was covered in purple smoke dust. the floor crunched with all of the fallen wasps that couldn't find an exit.
>> No. 379664 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 12:15 pm
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>>379366 >>379372
>> No. 379666 Anonymous
28th July 2014
Monday 12:39 pm
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This misleading, statistically speaking. There are far more cows knocking about than bulls. Do you have a view of "injuries caused per instance of the animal"?

Obvious sage for autism.

>> No. 379382 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 8:31 pm
379382 spacer
Is there a way for a 40+ man to fuck a 20 year old without it being creepy/Yewtree getting involved?
16 posts omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 379471 Anonymous
25th July 2014
Friday 12:15 am
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A girl once brought in a bag of cheap Cadbury Fingers she got from the market when I was in secondary school, and when I asked her why she clearly wasn't eating them she explained that they were mouldy. I, being the disbelieving little knowitall I was ("biscuits don't go mouldy! They go stale!"), decided to challenge her on this and taste one. I have never again felt the need to confirm that mould tastes exactly like it smells, but I can assure you that the taste filling your mouth is not a pleasant experience. I still don't eat Cadbury Fingers to this day.
>> No. 379473 Anonymous
25th July 2014
Friday 1:23 am
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Oh maaaaaan I miss Cadbury Fingers. I should buy it.
>> No. 379476 Anonymous
25th July 2014
Friday 12:46 pm
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The other day I got a big pack of reject Cadbury fingers from the quid shop. It must've been about 3 boxes worth in one bag.
>> No. 379477 Anonymous
25th July 2014
Friday 1:19 pm
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>> No. 379479 Anonymous
25th July 2014
Friday 3:16 pm
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Hey, get off with trying to tangle with ma' parsers!

>> No. 379389 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 9:01 pm
379389 What if.......
Not wishing to start a chaos theory cluster duck, but what seemingly minor moments or choices in your life do you think changed your life in a big way?

Not agreeing to "go out" with the fittest girl in my year when I was 11 because I thought it was a trick due to my suspicious mind and lack of self worth. Lindsey Foster if you are reading this I wanked hard over you for the rest of school and you are probably responsible for 50% of my teenlad semen output of the 80's.

Not going to Sandhurst in favour of something I though would be more fun and a longer term investment, but which resulted in various injuries, pointless languages and and aversion to hills and rucksacks.

Not telling her I loved her often enough.
11 posts omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 379454 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 4:19 pm
379454 spacer
It happened to me and I did exactly the same thing.
>> No. 379464 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 6:07 pm
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Cowards. You should have said yes to her advances, and if it turns out to be a joke, you should have stripped her naked and poured honey all over her, and beat her senseless.
>> No. 379470 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 11:01 pm
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What purpose does the honey serve?
>> No. 379472 Anonymous
25th July 2014
Friday 1:07 am
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It makes the revenge taste sweeter.
>> No. 379474 Anonymous
25th July 2014
Friday 10:53 am
379474 spacer
Top marks, that boy, top marks.

>> No. 378148 Anonymous
6th July 2014
Sunday 1:31 pm
378148 Russian impressions of British night life
Two Russian men from Latvia talk abot the typical British nightlife in Manchester.


Press the captions button for English subtitles.

154 posts and 5 images omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 379452 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 4:13 pm
379452 spacer
What are you doing here? You're not on the daily mail comment section any more, lad.
>> No. 379453 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 4:14 pm
379453 spacer

There is anecdotal evidence to suggest that hydration is a key factor in the progress of ketamine bladder syndrome, by diluting the concentration of ketamine metabolites in urine. KBS may be self-reinforcing - the damaged bladder becomes inflexible and reduces in capacity leading to frequent urination, which may discourage users from drinking water or mislead them as to their level of hydration.
>> No. 379455 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 4:19 pm
379455 spacer

I may be being thick here, but of the two papers you link I could only get full access to one of them (the one from the Hong Kong Medical Journal) and it clearly states under "Possible Mechanisms" that "The underlying pathophysiological mechanism for the destruction of the urinary tract by ketamine is unknown". Ergo it may not be Ketamine itself causing the damage.

The other paper (http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21314885) is clearly working with recreational Ketamine users. In other words they may not be using very pure Ketamine. They also don't seem to postulate any potential mechanisms of causation.

If it's not Ketamine itself causing the damage then what might it be? Well some ideas that come to mind are a new preservative agent being used that has some unknown toxicity that we're unaware of, bi-products from clandestine manufacture, research chemical analogues of Ketamine with unknown safety profiles such as MXE being sold as Ketamine or at least used to cut it, or even lifestyle (chronic dehydration, chronic malnutrition).

KBS is a fairly new phenomena. Chronic Ketamine abuse isn't.
>> No. 379459 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 4:39 pm
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The BJUI study ("Recreational Ketamine: from pleasure to pain") references primary in-vitro research.

Some publicly accessible papers on animal studies:

>> No. 379460 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 4:40 pm
379460 spacer

Nice one lad, I will chase those up.

>> No. 379348 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 9:09 am
379348 ISP Blocks
I've read, that every fifth Website in Britain is blocked by ISP's. This can't be true?
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>> No. 379404 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 11:34 pm
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Are you completely sure about that? It seems the report only deals with new customers and not existing customers. But more crucially there doesn't seem to be any population sizes given that would allow you to extrapolate an overall percentage from the four supplied by individual ISPs.
>> No. 379406 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 11:48 pm
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My mistake. I looked up ISP market share, did the maths and the actual opt-in percentage is 11.6%. Obviously this only represents the proportion of new customers who have been offered the filter.

>> No. 379415 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 4:19 am
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>> No. 379419 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 8:15 am
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I'm not sure I understand that image...
>> No. 379423 Anonymous
24th July 2014
Thursday 1:21 pm
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GRIS shows it's from a trial or investigation into someone in the future uploading videos over Tor. I guess he's trying to use anime to awkwardly imply we can use Tor to get around the block.

>> No. 378896 Anonymous
16th July 2014
Wednesday 7:58 pm
378896 Childhood assumptions
Tell me about things you believed in as a child that seem ridiculous now.

I thought the number of testicles in your nutsack increased with age.

I thought babies came out your Jap's eye.
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>> No. 379344 Anonymous
22nd July 2014
Tuesday 10:59 pm
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>I'm fairly sure that the idea of a vagina being an inside-out penis was thoroughly debunked as horseshit.

Correct but as >>379339 points out the head of the Clitoris is basically a miniature glans. If (adult) women take certain androgenic steroids the clitoris will grow and swell until it looks essentially like a miniature penis.

Go watch some of the porn of the ex WWF star Chyna if you want to see this, no she wasn't a man and had an op, she turned her clit into a mini knob through steroid abuse. .

In certain countries and places this is actually a thing (or has been). A few years ago there were girls in Rio de Janeiro who were taking steroids specifically in order to bloat their clits up For all I know it may still be a thing . I wish I was making this up.
>> No. 379345 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 12:25 am
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>> No. 379346 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 12:54 am
379346 spacer
Oh lord I wish I hadn't explored that site.
>> No. 379347 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 12:59 am
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Join the club.
>> No. 379351 Anonymous
23rd July 2014
Wednesday 11:13 am
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this. is. disturbing.

I had a girlfriend once with a somewhat larger clitoris. But still in no way as big as this.

Why would you want to do that??

>> No. 372024 Anonymous
27th February 2014
Thursday 11:12 am
372024 Fuckery in the Ukraine
So this is how its done;

I always thought those games where fire damage units do fuck all to tanks was kinda accurate
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>> No. 379288 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 7:59 pm
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Of course I actually paid it.
>> No. 379297 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 10:25 pm
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Of course?

I live in the US and I've never paid a medical bill.
>> No. 379298 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 10:35 pm
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You do realise we're talking about someone who didn't have any insurance? Try and keep up seppo.
>> No. 379299 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 10:55 pm
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I don't have insurance. Also fuck off.
>> No. 379301 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 11:45 pm
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Ooh handbags. Check the mouth on her.

>> No. 379275 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 6:49 pm
379275 shit
/b/ sent me off to Britain to collect a trophy, so give me something to bring back.

(A good day to you Sir!)
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>> No. 379277 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 6:54 pm
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Here, now fuck off and tell the rest of your ilk to post in /iq/ or /zoo/. /iq/ for British dependencies, protectorates and commonwealth, /zoo/ for the rest of the world.
>> No. 379282 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 7:19 pm
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>dependencies, protectorates and commonwealth

The thought of Falklandslad made me chortle.

"It's 5 degrees, windy and raining lads."
>> No. 379287 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 7:50 pm
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Goodness, that sounds lovely.
>> No. 379289 Anonymous
21st July 2014
Monday 8:01 pm
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"Sat out in the rain with a pint knitting union jack waistcoats for the penguins".

>> No. 378779 Anonymous
13th July 2014
Sunday 1:27 pm
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Lads. How, if at all, has .gs influenced you in the real world?

Do you find yourself saying ladm8, or arguing about who the third poster is perhaps?
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>> No. 379155 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 1:11 am
379155 spacer

How can I contact The Sun?

The fastest way is to call our journalists on 0845 086 3000 (from outside the UK dial 0044 207 782 4104).

NoScript says no way.

.gs. Your mission is to contact a Sun hack with a fabricated story and be published. Extra points for being an immigrant importer/ rebel fighter / dubious porn downloader called purple.
>> No. 379156 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 1:15 am
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>> No. 379157 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 1:23 am
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Six million bonus points if your story involves Neil Kinnock making a disgraceful outburst.
>> No. 379158 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 2:23 am
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If it's not illegal to lie to journalists, then I think I've found a new hobby.
>> No. 379160 Anonymous
20th July 2014
Sunday 2:39 am
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If it is then you should tell the police to start watching the daily politics and question time for some easy collars.

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