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>I'm aware of this. I spoke with a schizoid who entered the military. He said that despite the intensity of fear he was experiencing, ultimately, his sergeant praised him for maintaining steel nerves in the face of adversity even though he was just as scared as everyone else.
If my friends and/or coworkers are to be believed, that is also one of my traits. Apart from a few occasions where I have indeed lost it, I tend to be quite calm on the outside in the face of trouble. Inside, I will shit my pants the same way as everybody when there are still mountains of work to do before impossible deadlines can be met, or when my boss has another choleric outburst and says he "will fire the lot of us" (in his otherwise endearing Glasgow accent). Which he never really means, but oh well. But I tend to appear cool as a cucumber on the outside. Which prompted my coworkers to actually give me an original "keep calm and carry on" coffee mug for my birthday one year.
>Exactly. You desire independence from your environment however the reality is that the more dependent you are on something, the more power it wields over you. If you maximise your independence from it, you also maximise your power over it.
I'm still not sold on the way you put this idea about power. For me, it's not a consideration of power. It's simply the feeling that I am most comfortable when I am left alone and not bothered. I've got friends, and I have had romantic relationships, and I enjoy both friendships and relationships as much as the next person. But I always have this feeling that I need much more breathing space than most other people I know. I will for example sometimes disappear off the face of the earth for a week or two, for all that some of my best friends will know, but then reappear out of the blue and pick up again where we left the last time we saw each other. In the past, this has alienated both some of my friends and sometimes also women that I was with, but it is the only way to be for me. Of course, you can't just do a disappearing act on a romantic partner like that, so it was more a kind of tendency to sometimes not call for two or three days but with no bad intentions whatsoever. But even that can be a tough act to follow, especially when you're with somebody who's a bit on the needy side, and who will interpret a stunt like that as a questioning of your entire relationship.
In the end, I'm past the point where being schizoid was an abnormality to me, a hindrance or an obstacle that would have kept me from living a normal life. Nowadays, I try to see the blessings of it, which are that I am both a person who tends not to crack under fear, and somebody who is independent and self sufficient enough that he doesn't necessarily need other people to enjoy himself. Oh, and of course there's my dream world imagination. To tell you the truth, I would sorely miss my imagination if somehow one day it would disappear from my psyche.