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>> No. 18262 Anonymous ## Mod ##
5th March 2014
Wednesday 8:27 pm
18262 Please check the old pages for similar threads Locked Stickied
before creating a new one.
Failure to do so may result in angry shouting.

>> No. 23560 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 6:49 pm
23560 Minor angst and existential dread, Mk. I
We tend to have a lot of repeated threads here, but I also get the feeling people don't tend to post in /emo/ unless it's a big issue.

With this in mind I suggest that we have a thread for stuff that's got you down a bit and you need to get off your chest, without it being major enough to make an entire thread devoted to it. We can also use it as a go-to for minor relationship advice, work problems, social drama, and things like that.

Everyone gets down from time to time, let's put some Sisters of Mercy on and wallow together for a while.
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>> No. 25802 Anonymous
15th November 2017
Wednesday 6:19 pm
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Just play up to it. You have to own your wierd personality traits, and realise that people probably don't hate you for it. Have a bit of self deprecating banter with the people you send them to and try not to over think it all.
>> No. 25803 Anonymous
16th November 2017
Thursday 12:08 am
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If a weird obnoxious twat like Russell Brand can turn saying strange things into a knobbing tactic, then so can you.
>> No. 25804 Anonymous
16th November 2017
Thursday 5:01 pm
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Pffft! Fucking hell, I'm 23 in a month. I know that's not remotely old or anything but I swear I was 19 about 15 minutes ago. I really need to get my shit together. Football Manager considers the cut off for personal progress to be 24 and who am I to disagree?
>> No. 25806 Anonymous
20th November 2017
Monday 6:21 pm
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So I'm being chased for debt from 02 for a phone contract I fucking cancelled two years ago.

I've phoned them up and phoned the bullshit "upgrade team" third party cunts as well as the debt collectors and given them all my story. None of them reckon they can help and each of them claims it's somebody else's responsibility, not theirs.

I'm sure they all think I'm just some chancer trying to get away without paying it, but the thing is I have fucking proof I sent it back, I sent it by recorded delivery and I still have a copy of that receipt saved. But I'm going around in circles trying to get anywhere.

Do I have to bloody sue them or what? This shit's causing a big black mark on my credit file that I want rid of. It's like I've been scammed except it's by a massive company who is supposed to do things right.

(Yes I know you're going to say "go to Citizen's Advice" but it's a Monday night so I'm not going to have chance any time soon.)
>> No. 25807 Anonymous
20th November 2017
Monday 6:49 pm
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You can phone CAB, their advisors phone up and badger O2 for you once you forward them the appropriate information. I had the same problem with 3.

The Truth.jpg
>> No. 25761 Anonymous
27th October 2017
Friday 11:11 pm
25761 Father issues
Fairly sure this is for /emo/. Please only shout reasonably angrily if it is not.

I have never known nor seen my father. As a child I can only assume I asked my mother on very rare and sporadic occasions about him, with no conviction. As a young man I now wonder, and have done for while admittedly, what it would be like to meet him.

Can any lads who have had experiences of meeting their fathers for the first time during adulthood provide any advice?

P.S. I'm not 'totally fucked up man cos my dad left me innit'.
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>> No. 25767 Anonymous
29th October 2017
Sunday 9:20 am
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See, I find your story strangely unsympathetic because you really went out of your way to track someone down who did not want to be found, who had actively decided that you would be better off without him in your life. As a father yourself can you imagine the kind of self-awareness that would make a man distance himself from a child like that? Or are you only thinking about this in one direction? We're only human. Your dad knew he's not the best person in the world. You hired a PI to track him down and judge him a second time for a lifetime pennance he had already self imposed.

Food for thought though OPlad. Just think about why exactly you want to find him, what kind of hole do you imagine it will fill? On a logical level you must be well aware that it's more than likely only going to be a let down? He's just the bloke he donated some spank to your mam. He could be a junkie or he could be a millionaire, but by this point he'll never be your dad. Sorry.
>> No. 25769 Anonymous
29th October 2017
Sunday 9:42 am
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That's somewhat apparent in hindsight but it could easily have been very different.
>> No. 25770 Anonymous
29th October 2017
Sunday 3:11 pm
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So you were banking on him being a millionaire?
>> No. 25771 Anonymous
29th October 2017
Sunday 4:26 pm
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My sister has some significant baggage regarding her absent father, but I've never really understood it. What's it actually like? Would you enlighten me?
>> No. 25805 Anonymous
19th November 2017
Sunday 10:47 pm
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OP here. Thanks for the replies lads. Your posts have been illuminating. I've not gotten any contact info, but my mother has told me a few stories and helped as she can. Currently debating whether it's worth it or not. I'll probably do this for some time.

generally don't like being sociable, but I do like knowing everything I can

This very much like me. I'm not looking for anything specific, I just have the overriding need to know. Hopefully if I ever do choose to pursue him he won't turn out to be a scrotum.


It was baggage for me as a teen and does still bother me from time to time. Not terribly, for example, some cunt putting their feet on the bus seat would quickly bother me more. I think the morals attached to the issue (and my issue at hand) get at me more than anything else, especially when I habitually exhibit traits that I find distasteful in others. I find it infinitely curious and frustrating that a man could abandon his son and never try to make contact with him. I'm a coward sometimes, so I won't claim that 'I would never abandon my children like my father did me' but if I ever did I know that I would just HAVE to find about them and speak with them at some point.

I'm unsure if gender is a factor (pretty sure the differences are small, if existant). My sister had a lot of baggage/issues with her dad being absent. Difference was he was in a few pictures my mum kept and got back in touch with my sister as of seven-ish years ago.

I'm sure it's different for other people, but that's my take on it mate.

>> No. 24845 Anonymous
27th April 2017
Thursday 5:32 pm
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My life has gone downhill ever since I met a Brazilian Ju Jitsu fighter at Westfield and saw him selling copies of big tissue. It's strange but the way I remember it was that I was set for everything but at December in 2011, things became worse. Nothing mattered and I couldn't eat much as well as wondering whether the nootropics I was taking would actually end up in me being hospitalised. It becomes extraordinarily strange when I realise a lot of it was recorded on this here website, on the IRC itself. I want to understand exactly what was happening in 2012. There's some more things that happened which include kidnapping, torture and brainwashing (as well as strong secret service intimidation) but I wanted to find out exactly why my life became strange.

I remember absolutely everything as well as absolutley nothing. If you get my gist.
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>> No. 25619 Anonymous
13th September 2017
Wednesday 6:16 pm
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>> No. 25620 Anonymous
13th September 2017
Wednesday 6:16 pm
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This is hilarious.
>> No. 25621 Anonymous
13th September 2017
Wednesday 6:33 pm
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If you're talking about the same meetup I attended, I refuse to believe any MI5 recruitment front would involve the playing of 2 girls 1 cup on a widescreen projector.
>> No. 25622 Anonymous
13th September 2017
Wednesday 7:04 pm
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Ah but thats what we they want you to think!
>> No. 25789 Anonymous
11th November 2017
Saturday 10:05 pm
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What's more hilarious is how the idea of Shariah Patrols were popularised. On the night of the 2011 riots, I made a post in the huge thread we had on .gs about the activities of the YMO. purple decided to take this to parliament and they ended up having a discussion about it. Soon after, purple decided to engineer a series of youtube videos about it and then the idea took hold within the imaginations of a few billion. This only happened because of that imageboard post as purple would have otherwise left such propaganda alone.

When I really think about it, I probably would have never lived a normal life but I'm sort of satisfied when I was successfully able to promote the idea of semi autonomous regions existing within London. That in itself is some sort of recompense I suppose.

Does any moderator have the capability to show me the riots thread?

I think it's a fairly serious matter at this point.

>> No. 25772 Anonymous
2nd November 2017
Thursday 4:17 pm
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Continutation of


I sat in a meeting room by myself and cried today. The other week i went driving in a state i shouldn't have, it was the best thing I've done in months. I had a sad beer with a mate for my birthday, i had to drive a long way to go for it then left at 8am the next morning. That's the only person I've spoken to except for my mum outside work in god knows how long.

I'm setting myself a date to quit and another date to quit everything else. If nothing changes by then its over. I'm going to the doctor next week because i need to talk to someone. Sorry.
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>> No. 25773 Anonymous
2nd November 2017
Thursday 5:19 pm
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What part of the Isles do you hail from, lad?

>> No. 25754 Anonymous
22nd October 2017
Sunday 6:51 pm
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I realise I find it extremely difficult to accept praise, but any criticism no matter how thoughtless cuts extremely deep.

Why am I so skeptical of the nice things that people say, in just about any context? And why do the harsh or disrespectful interactions stay in my mind?

Occasionally I will feel good when someone I care about or admire praises me. On the other hand a stupid joke made by a stranger, or a comment from someone I barely know, has a far greater emotional impact.

It could be to do with my general beliefs about social relationships. I believe we generally become more compassionate with people we take the time to know, so subconsciously I'm often on guard against the more cruel side people show when they can get away with it. Expecting something can make it that much worse when it happens. The same belief would lead me to undervalue genuine praise from people who matter, precisely because they're closer (more likely to 'just be nice').

Could this also be to do with my general self-esteem, and how I've structured my self-worth?

Could it also be a general human thing, where our sensitivity to loss or threat is much greater than our appreciation of what's gained (as in 'loss aversion')?
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>> No. 25756 Anonymous
22nd October 2017
Sunday 7:06 pm
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I do dwell on criticism. I like to think I'm parsing whether the criticism has any basis, but the truth is I give it far more thought than the person who originally offered it.

I'm also very self-criticial, for what it's worth.

Yes, I do suffer from intrusive thoughts.
>> No. 25757 Anonymous
22nd October 2017
Sunday 7:27 pm
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There are a lot of things that I suspect are at work but overall it's pretty normal to feel this way. I'll list a couple and you can see what I mean:

Yes, the brain is hardwired towards noticing your faults and it is why people whose jobs involve isolated travel end up depressed. You can test this yourself by first listing all the negative things about yourself and then try writing an equal list of positive attributes - the positive will be much harder if not impossible. We can assume you're not actually an awful person just that the perspective and standards you set for yourself are unduly harsh.

Secondly, it is again natural for you to assume that others act as part of a convoluted plot (while you merely react), there is a pretty solid IR theory that this led to the Sino-Indian War if you want to see things getting massively out of hand. Obviously when you catch yourself thinking like this it is important to remember that people are just winging it through life and actual plots are quite rare - you are not, after all, the main character in other peoples lives.

At the heart of it though it sounds like you have some self-confidence issues that you could start to resolve by thinking back to some of these compliments and taking them at face value. Even when someone is giving harsh criticism it helps to remember that to simply be noticed and for someone to take the time to criticise contains a sliver of respect - as Dale Carnegie says "nobody ever kicks a dead dog".
>> No. 25758 Anonymous
22nd October 2017
Sunday 7:35 pm
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>it is why people whose jobs involve isolated travel end up depressed.
I don't follow.
>there is a pretty solid IR theory that this led to the Sino-Indian War if you want to see things getting massively out of hand
A what and a what?

(not OP)
>> No. 25759 Anonymous
22nd October 2017
Sunday 7:45 pm
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>I don't follow.

If you're trapped with your own thoughts for long periods of time you end up dwelling on all the bad things about yourself. The mind loves to play back memories of that really embarrassing thing you did that one time.

>A what and a what?

I don't see what you're stuck on. Both sides saw the others actions as part of a plot and there own as merely justified reactions in a pattern of escalation. I bring it up because people like real world examples to remember things.
>> No. 25760 Anonymous
22nd October 2017
Sunday 10:16 pm
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There's loads of useful stuff in this thread:


>> No. 25750 Anonymous
19th October 2017
Thursday 8:24 pm
25750 Success!
Well, /emo/,

I have finally made it. You may remember some of my previous threads regarding my romantic exploits, or rather the failures.

I was made homeless and put into a hostel. After much shagging about I have managed to meet a law graduate at the hostel and start a very successful relationship. Just when I was least expecting it. Beauty, intelligence and wit all in one.

It's been going a month so far...
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>> No. 25751 Anonymous
19th October 2017
Thursday 8:33 pm
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What about personal development?
>> No. 25753 Anonymous
21st October 2017
Saturday 5:34 pm
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It's actually helped me to develop and maintain emotional well-being a great deal. It's good to meet someone with such similar interests. We share a great deal of the same interests.

Pic is her...

>> No. 25741 Anonymous
18th October 2017
Wednesday 8:58 pm
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In 2010 I was er, heavily invested in the Bitcoin community. I had hundreds of bitcoins. I lost them all. Right now I feel like an absolute cunt. How do I get over this sort of regret? I can't stop thinking about it. My life right now could do with even a small fortune, let alone the millions of pounds I could have had. I just needed somewhere to vent really. Fuck.
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>> No. 25743 Anonymous
18th October 2017
Wednesday 9:24 pm
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There are many stories like this, and the best argument I've heard as consolation is this:

Keeping your bitcoins would never have been a single decision to keep them until they hit 5 grand each. It would take many separate decisions over the past 7 years when they hit £1 each, then £10, then £100 and so on.

Can you honestly say that in 2012 you would have foreseen the growth that continued for the following 5 years, and continued holding instead of cashing out then? Chances are you would have taken a much smaller windfall at some earlier point in time because it would have been the reasonable decision at that time.

Regretting your loss now is not so drastically different from everyone else who never invested but wishes that they had, because hindsight is 20/20.
>> No. 25744 Anonymous
18th October 2017
Wednesday 9:28 pm
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To expand on this slightly - would you be willing to purchase £50 worth of Bitcoins now and hold onto them for another decade, on the basis that worldwide adoption could again multiply that investment a thousandfold or more?

If you're not willing to do it now, what makes you think you would have made a different decision in 2012?
>> No. 25745 Anonymous
18th October 2017
Wednesday 9:34 pm
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There are a lot of things I'd do differently if I had a time machine. There are things that made me feel shit with regret for a good while. It's fine, it's only a smouldering core of hatred buried deep under layers of pretending to be happy. You're still gonaa make many more mistakes like that, but at least there are other decisions you made correctly. Like spending the money on drugs instead. Good man, money is evil anyway.
>> No. 25746 Anonymous
18th October 2017
Wednesday 11:24 pm
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Exactly this - just like any other forms of investment, it is difficult to cash them out when they become losing, and even more difficult to just sit tight and hold on to them when you're winning. I've done quite a bit of stock investing - life generally gets in the way. There are very few people who can afford to invest in something and then sit back for seven years without touching it. You (mostly) need to be already very rich to get into that position.
>> No. 25752 Anonymous
20th October 2017
Friday 12:29 am
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It's the old problem of not taking the long-term view when investing.

Many people think that short-term trading is a way to make considerable profits the easy way. And it seems reasonable enough, given that a) stocks can climb and fall dramatically within short spaces of time, and b) thousands of professional traders make their employers loads of money that way every day.

But the problem is that you as a retail investor have no way on Earth of predicting stock prices with any degree of recurring accuracy, and that you neither have the means to move millions in and out of stocks to influence their price action nor the inside information to know what big players will drive which stock up or down in the near future.

There are retail investors who have managed to make a fortune in the stock market, and most important of all, keep it. But they invariably bought stocks at times when they were down on their fundamentals and with a view to holding a stock for several years if necessary.

Traders just do not make money long-term. Trading tends to result in piss poor performance compared to buy-and-hold. But there are still enough people every day who "blow up" and lose their whole trading account because they think they know better.

I have made huge profits and similarly large losses with stock investments. I've got over 15 years experience. My noteworthy profits have almost without exception been through long-term investing, while almost all my losses were from trading. And I have witnessed enough people on trading web forums crash and burn because they thought they were the new Warren Buffett. When ironically, he is one of the most outspoken opponents of short-term trading.

>> No. 25732 Anonymous
12th October 2017
Thursday 9:41 am
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I hate these ghosts they never leave they just hang around inside your head no matter how long or how you try to escape them or distract yourself. Why won't they just fuck off? Just fucking go, please.
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>> No. 25733 Anonymous
12th October 2017
Thursday 12:32 pm
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What ails you, lad? Try to be more specific.
>> No. 25734 Anonymous
12th October 2017
Thursday 5:48 pm
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Bruce Lee.png
Guilt or regret?
>> No. 25735 Anonymous
12th October 2017
Thursday 5:59 pm
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>> No. 25736 Anonymous
12th October 2017
Thursday 6:16 pm
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Guilt, then.
Only you can absolve yourself of it and it's up to you how it's done. I've read the word martyr a lot recently.

Are you doing this to me?
>> No. 25737 Anonymous
12th October 2017
Thursday 7:23 pm
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Emily, your syntax has come on leaps and bounds; well done.

>> No. 25719 Anonymous
4th October 2017
Wednesday 11:40 pm
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I worry how much I love my girlfriend. I could just about take care of worrying about myself. The pain I'm set up for is immense. 5 years or 50 years down the line. My mind seems cruelly inclined to remind me of this in the sweetest most loving moments. That one day she'll fucking die, or be in pain, and I have to watch as the person I spent a lifetime bringing into myself is wrenched away. I have this for all my family members. My mother, my sister, father. I can't enjoy things. I looked into her eyes earlier on and I told her I loved her, she looked back with nothing but honesty and it made me cry, not because it was tender but because it scared me. I think I need help, what do you think?
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>> No. 25721 Anonymous
5th October 2017
Thursday 1:13 pm
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She'll probably cheat on you with some 6'4" black guy long before you have to worry about her death, lad. Chin up.

All things must come to an end. There really isn't a lot that can be done to shield oneself from it. Death is just the way of life. Then again, I've been exposed to death from quite a young age, I think all but one of my grandparents were dead by the time I was 22. You simply have to learn to accept it in the way we all do, I'm afraid.
>> No. 25722 Anonymous
5th October 2017
Thursday 6:33 pm
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>She'll probably cheat on you with some 6'4" black guy

Kindly fuck off back to 4chan, there's a good chap.
>> No. 25723 Anonymous
5th October 2017
Thursday 9:06 pm
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Isn't this one of the reasons to have pets? So you can get some practice at the crushing sadness of loss before it's your family, rather than diving in at the deep end.
Damned if I know, lost best mate at 16. Still affects me, 30 years on. All grandparents gone before I was 20 - meh, old people die (with some sadness, but not as awful, by any stretch).
A good life, and an OK death, that would do me.
>> No. 25726 Anonymous
8th October 2017
Sunday 3:53 pm
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Cupid and Psyche by Edvard Munch.jpg
Make the most of the time you will have with them. If you outlive your girlfriend at an old age you will probably, like my grandfather did, take some solace in both saving her the pain and grief that will be put on you if she was in your position, and also that you made her life full, along with your family's when they go before her. Don't try to build up on the fact that grief is inevitable. Just focus on making the most of life and remembering the good memories that you shared with them.
>> No. 25727 Anonymous
8th October 2017
Sunday 3:56 pm
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Eye in Eye by Edvard Munch.jpg
Also, there's a reason why it'll be the hardest thing to do in life if you try and only focus on the joy of life because, unfortunately, it's the only thing we can do. It's either that or we give up, which is th easiest thing to do, to not live life, and then ultimately kill ourselves. It's not all grave.

>> No. 25702 Anonymous
2nd October 2017
Monday 11:43 am
25702 "Shut the fuck up."
I've been dating this girl for a little over a month and talking for two. She's been over at my place near enough every weekend and we've quickly become accustomed to one another's presence. It's been rocky due to her being quite a "spirtual" person and leading by gut instinct in comparison to my prim and proper logical approach. Naturally with new couples a lot of the tiffs can be chalked up to miscommunication or not being aware of the hard boundaries of your significant other. Fair enough.

She's currently on the rag. We were in bed last night and we got to talking about how she wanted to have sex despite it being her time of the month. We'd already done so earlier in the day. She said she wanted to try 69ing (something I've not tried in the past due to a fairly vanilla sex life) and I explained how I wasn't really comfortable with it due to my germaphobia and not wanting to risk ingesting rotting fucking uterine lining. She went into overdrive and started running off about how I always hurt her when we had sex in her favourite position and how it risked bruising her cervix. I covered my face with my hands and interrupted her mid-diatribe with a firm but casual "shut the fuck up." The atmosphere between us changed immediately. What was a sexually heated session turned debate quickly soured into an icy silence.

"Don't tell me to shut the fuck up," she replied from somewhere in the murky darkness to my right. "I don't tell you to shut the fuck up."

I explained to her that since we had begun dating — and she had consequently become more comfortable around me — she'd started to interrupt me a lot more, often to interject with her own premature opinion or some tangentially related tidbit about a friend or family member. I also explained that she often lacked the ability to rationalise and explained to her that the health risks associated with ingesting the blood of others isn't even in the same field as cervical bruising. I don't need to go into the details but I'm sure you'll agree.

She promptly turned over and refused to talk to me until the morning where I walked her to the station and kissed her goodbye for work.

This probably seems like some silly teenlad / copypasta shite and I totally get why you'd think that but I'm currently in my mid-twenties and haven't had a stable relationship in a while due to my on again, off again relationship with depression, a faltering career (already), and general lack of self worth from abusive previous relationships.

Do the actions described above make me a toxic or controlling person, especially losing my temper so early on? Is she the one that's fucked? Does this mean we're not compatible as a couple? Have you made a similar exclamation to a significant other and if so how did it turn out?

☑ Moan because I feel like I spend more time asking you two for advice than I do sorting my own problems like a Man™.
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>> No. 25709 Anonymous
2nd October 2017
Monday 3:36 pm
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>His behaviour doesn't have an easy excuse

Sure it does; he was consumed by his disgust at the idea and spoke his mind unfiltered. Then he told her to 'shut the fuck up' because no one deserves to have to stand there quietly and be berated.

>You could argue that she should understand why he was freaking out but that expects too much from people and anyway.

That's exactly my point. You expect him to understand and accept her problems. But you aren't holding her to the same standard.

When she brings up issues that she never brought up until this point I see that as her digging around for ammo to throw back at him, but you describe it as "a legitimate sex complaint", her problem is not that she lacks understanding of him, it is that her way of dealing with being offended is to find fault in the other person and attack.

If she accepted his point about "rotting fucking uterine lining" wasn't a personal attack but badly worded decline she could have been the better person, but she isn't. Neither have good people skills.
>> No. 25710 Anonymous
2nd October 2017
Monday 5:09 pm
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I have to agree with >>25703 in that you two don't seem compatible in the long run, at least from what you've told us there. Yes you probably shouldn't have told her to shut the fuck up but she also should have understood why you didn't want to 69 while she's on her period. If anything I'd just advise that you both work on your communication skills.
>> No. 25711 Anonymous
2nd October 2017
Monday 6:08 pm
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>not wanting to risk ingesting rotting fucking uterine lining.


Just break up for fuck sake, it's been a month, I can't imagine you've already merged your sodding bank accounts. I didn't even get a third of the way through your pointless novella and it's obvious.
>> No. 25713 Anonymous
2nd October 2017
Monday 8:40 pm
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Well this is quite a cunty /emo/ thread. Sounds like you're all on your rag. And no I don't want to lick your bloody fanny.

Anyway OP.

>Do the actions described above make me a toxic or controlling person, especially losing my temper so early on?

I don't think so personally. Telling her to shut the fuck up is a bit harsh though, especially if you've only been going out a month. I'm not surprised she then got a bit defensive.

You then continued to dig your own hole with all the stuff about her interrupting, health risks blahblahblah. For a rational person you should realise that this was silly. Of course she's going to get upset with that sort of shit, especially if she's on the rag.

>Is she the one that's fucked?

Pressuring you into doing something sexually you're not comfortable with is a bit of a cunt move but then so is telling someone to shut the fuck up and sperging out.

So I'd say you're probably both a bit fucked, everyone is really. You're both just flawed damaged human beings like we all are and it sounds like a shitty argument. It needn't be a big deal, which lead onto;
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.
>> No. 25714 Anonymous
3rd October 2017
Tuesday 10:19 am
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Listen to this man, OP. You’re not compatible, just break up and move on.

>> No. 25093 Anonymous
8th July 2017
Saturday 10:47 pm
25093 010 something nice thread
We have the whinging thread in 101 and the minor angst thread here, how about a thread for small things that have happened we're happy about?
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>> No. 25668 Anonymous
18th September 2017
Monday 11:48 pm
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>> No. 25669 Anonymous
19th September 2017
Tuesday 12:15 am
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I have three folders: 'Uncategorised', 'Misc.', and 'Everything Else'.
>> No. 25671 Anonymous
20th September 2017
Wednesday 5:23 am
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I'm going to go to the Freshers event today. I'm going to make friends. They won't even notice my odd voice or complete lack of personality. By February of next year I will be living independently and will be dating a woman who I might even marry, should I wish it, just as soon as she's seen what a fully grown-up-bloke-man I can be.

All of this and more will come to pass under the guidance of Our Goddess Eris.
>> No. 25672 Anonymous
20th September 2017
Wednesday 11:48 am
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>They won't even notice my odd voice or complete lack of personality.

That's par for the course, you're a fresher. You've all got odd voices and no personalities. Speaking as a former mature student, you're all absolutely ludicrous specimens. If you don't have a ridiculous self-imposed nickname, blue hair and some crap patter about your gap yah, then you're well above average in the "not being a bellend" stakes.

>dating a woman who I might even marry

Definitely don't do that. Settle for someone for cuffing season if you want, but get yourself back on the market in April. Don't squander your prime shagging years on the first girl who shows any sort of interest. You're surrounded by nubile and slightly naive girls who are intoxicated by independence and Yaegerbombs. Make the most of it.

>a fully grown-up-bloke-man

Ha! You will look back on your university years with a deep, profound sense of embarrassment; if you don't, you've made a terrible mistake. Students are supposed to be annoying little gobshites who cut about town in a leopard-print onesie, drink cider out of a welly boot and have cringeworthy conversations about Sartre and house music. If you don't make a complete tit of yourself, you'll miss out on most of the fun. Embrace the cringe.
>> No. 25673 Anonymous
20th September 2017
Wednesday 12:07 pm
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Good luck lad. I wouldn't rely on the Goddess to provide you with anything other than chaos though. That is more her purview. Maybe if you were planning to drop acid before going.

>> No. 25624 Anonymous
14th September 2017
Thursday 4:28 pm
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I feel like I'm having a bit of a crisis lads. Long post incoming and you'll have to forgive me if I can't quite artciulate myself as well as I would like to; my brain has been a little foggy lately.

I've had a niggling feeling for a while that I don't feel quite right, and to say I feel disatisfied with myself and my situation would be an understatement. Not that things are bad, I have it much better than a lot of people, but recent events have kicked my mind and anxiety into overgear. I'll explain as best as I can.

About a week or so ago I found out that my dad might be losing his job. The decision is about a year away, there's a good chance that he won't, and even if he does, my parents own the house, have savings etc, so this would hopefully hold them over until he gets something else (he is 59 though and it's the North East so the job market isnt exactly great). I feel confident in him. This doesn't stop me from worrying however - I've always been a worrier. Now, some of this worry is for the obvious reason that I am concerned about my parents. But secondly, it really threw me back because it felt as though a pillar was crumbling. My dad has worked this job since before I was born, it's what I have always known. All the stability and privision is because of that, all the nice things me and my sister had were becuase of that. I'm sure loads of people change jobs (I've had a bunch already), so I don't why this is having such an impact. Since he told me about the situation, my mind has been racing with childhood memories and guilt, I really can't explain why. It does however, feel that my younger years are closing in, one constant I have always known may be coming to an end.

The second thing that happened is that my very good (perhaps best) friend just got engaged and asked me to be best man. Now I'm very happy for them both and it was even because of me they met, so its kind of crazy seeing the whole thing from start to finish. But this also knocked me back - my friends are getting married. Again, I'm happy for them, they are a great couple. It just blows my mind that the guy I met when I was 18 is now getting married. I was speaking to my parents about it and they assumed that me and my girlfriend would be next, as though they wouldn't find it odd, as though I'm at that age already. The concept of physically aging doesn't really bother me, I've never been a looker and I've been losing my hair since 22, but to be considered the age for things such as this and that I should begin settling down blows my mind a little. This all probably sounds quite standard to a lot of people here, that I'm scared of growing up. I get that. But I am struggling with it, and combined with what I mentioned in the paragraph above, I've barely slept all week as silly as it sounds.

A third point is my girlfriend. I do like her and probably do love her, I certainly care about it. But, can't help feel that long term we really aren't suited to one another. The other night something happened that not only confirmed this but also frightened me. Sex has always been a bit of a hot topic with us. Other than when we first got together, my desire for it has been quite low, certainly much lower than hers (I'm not sure why, I don't really masturbate much either, other than to help me sleep). This causes frequent arguments becase I don't always want to have sex, to points where she can get quite nasty. This has always bugged me, as if it were the other way around and I was getting so angry because she wouldn't sleep with me I can't imagine all of the names that would be thrown at me! Anyway, the other night I was concerned with what my dad had just told me and I really wasn't in the mood, so, she gets upset and angry as usual. This time however, she gets more confrontational and complains that I'm just lying in bed (I just wanted to try and sleep at this point), eventually, she grabs a knife from the kitchen and holds it against her wrists so that I would react. This honestly frighened me, and I had the worst panic attack I can remember having as a result. It was unexpected and it was a mean thing to do just to get a reaction out of me. Ever since then, I feel that I have been mentally detatched.

Lastly, I still get that teenage urge of selling my things in a panic and moving to another country (an old, sort of friend got a work visa for Canada and I feel jealous to be honest). I've had a bunch of different jobs (even a proper, sort of respectable grad job at one point, but fuck wearing a tie and shirt and sitting at a desk 9 - 5). At the moment, I get by (cover expenses and save a little) working a bunch of different jobs in the arts and I've decided to have a go getting a video production business off the ground, nothing special right now just some freelance editing gigs to test the water. The thing is, I'm 26 and as mentioned above, I feel like everyone is waiting for me to get a proper full time job and settle down. Conversely, I feel as though I'm waiting for my life to start getting exciting and interesting.

The above has been a bit of a messy post, but like I said my head has been all over lately. I apologise for spelling and grammatical errors, or if it doesn't make sense.

I just want to chat to some of you guys about it, any insight or advice would be greatly appreciated. Constructive advice especially, I've tried counselling in the past a few times and it was pointless, it didn't give me any sense of what to do next.
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>> No. 25635 Anonymous
14th September 2017
Thursday 8:18 pm
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>It's the kind of behaviour that can quickly escalate into something much more sinister.
Like what? Taking uncomfortably long and hot showers?

My girlfriend once nonchalantly told me that she cut herself because of me. I told her to cut her wrists if she really means it. She hasn't said anything as stupid as that since.
>> No. 25653 Anonymous
17th September 2017
Sunday 9:40 pm
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Sorry lads, I've been working away this weekend so I've just seen the responses. Very much appreciate all the advice though.

Aren't they all?

I've calmed down a fair bit since then regarding my dad, especially since having a chat with him. Worst case, I can help him find something when the time comes or at least put him a CV together, applying for jobs is a fair bit different than it was 30 odd years ago.

I think my anxiety did steep from seeing him having a vulnerability. Despite my age, I still sort of see my dad as a bloke who can just get on with anything and have it sorted, him being in a predicament seems so odd to me.

I'm not envious that my friends are getting married, I think it's a bit of a risk these days, it's just the idea of them moving on and settling down - I want to do the opposite, I know that 26 isn't old but it doesn't feel young either. It's easy to disregard what people think of you, but it's hard to not give a fuck sometimes.

As for the lass, I probably should. Deep down I sort of feel that I'll see it to the end and suffer the misery instead of nipping it in the bud. Other than the incident I mentioned previously, things are fine with us, so it makes it very difficult.

Regarding Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, I like it in theory, I tried it, and it did nothing for me. Neither did regular counselling and couples counselling felt like a bigger waste of time - couldn't help but feel the bloke was trying to pin all of the problems on me.
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>> No. 25655 Anonymous
17th September 2017
Sunday 10:59 pm
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>Despite my age, I still sort of see my dad as a bloke who can just get on with anything and have it sorted, him being in a predicament seems so odd to me.
If you're 26 then yeah, it's certainly time you started seeing your dad as a regular human being with flaws and all, not an infallible font of ability and security.

>Other than the incident I mentioned previously, things are fine with us
She grabbed a knife and threatened to cut her wrists because you wouldn't have sex with her, and you mentioned she has been "quite nasty" about your sex life in the past. Try and put yourself in the shoes of people reading this. Imagine a friend told you that, what would your reaction be? I'm as loathe as the other posters here to trot out the usual "dump the crazy bitch" rhetoric, but that is seriously worrying behaviour and at the very least you two need to sit down and talk it out. Communicate your concerns, and make sure you let her do the same. Try and listen.

Good luck mate, hope it all works out, especially that video production business you mentioned; even if you're just thinking seriously about getting that sort of thing off the ground then you're ahead of most of your peers in terms of ambition and maturity.
>> No. 25657 Anonymous
18th September 2017
Monday 12:15 am
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> I feel that my situation would be improved if I just had the balls to be honest with myself

There you go, thats a great start. Look in the mirror - take responsibility for your own life, it's all your fault. I find this to be the most liberating idea, because if you take responsibility for something, you can fix it.

Dump the mad bitch.
>> No. 25658 Anonymous
18th September 2017
Monday 10:11 am
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>which is a highly treatable problem

...if you can get treatment for it. I've been waiting about a year now.

>> No. 25506 Anonymous
6th September 2017
Wednesday 10:57 am
25506 How do you be less boring?

I'm a boring cunt.

I mean, this really hit me when a drunk girl shouted it at me in a club, but it's true.

I like graphic design of the 1960s and road signs. The sort of music I listen to involves polite headbanging and absolutely no dancing.

I go to societies at university to escape the crippling loneliness I feel most of the time, and any time they hold a night out I force myself to go, but I can't dance. I just freeze up; I end up stood there leaning against a wall or a pole or whatever (with my earplugs in, I struggle to hear anything when the volume is too loud, it's just like static). People will grab my arms, etc, trying to get me to dance, but I can't. I wish I could, but I can't.

I don't even like drinking any more; I used to get quite drunk on the regular but it doesn't make me any more interesting, it just amplifies the negative thoughts inside my head, and makes me feel physically like shit too -- I used to be hangover-proof but as I'm discovering that fades very quickly with age.

I tried some of the devil's lettuce (in a jurisdiction where it is legal), and I suppose like with any mood altering substance you need to be in the right frame of mind to start with or it won't end well -- it didn't, I hated it. I felt out of control and just panicked.

Is there any way out of this? Finding friends with similar interests is difficult, and the few that I do find are like me: largely dull.
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>> No. 25642 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 8:53 pm
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If you don't have the licensing rights to a piece of music then you cannot play it in a public place. That's the law. Otherwise artists (or rather, their labels) don't receive their due royalties for their work.

To keep things simple the vast majority of recording artists and subcontract the business of music licensing to the Performing Right Society, or PRS For Music Ltd. They collect a standard fee from you, and then you can play Radio 2 as much as you like in your pub.
>> No. 25643 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 9:10 pm
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Shame torrenting hasn't killed the music industry.
>> No. 25644 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 9:42 pm
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As long as people are willing to nosh another person off just so that they will maybe possibly might consider asking someone else if the maybe possibly could listen to the first 10 seconds of their song, there will always be a music industry.
>> No. 25645 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 9:57 pm
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The industry is a shitshow, but I'll defend PRS to the death. Major, independent or unsigned, PRS fight to make sure that musicians get paid. For struggling artists at the bottom of the ladder, those quarterly cheques are often the only thing keeping the wolf from the door.
>> No. 25647 Anonymous
16th September 2017
Saturday 2:27 pm
25647 OP
Well this took an interesting turn.

I wear invisible earplugs to places like this as I have sensitive hearing anyway. They aren't the bright orange sticky-outy ones, so no-one can tell unless they stare into my ear.

If I don't wear them, I have to ask people to repeat things past the point of what they said being relevant.

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