|>>|| No. 28470
I'm going to be blunt with you here ladm9. I want you to understand it's out of kindness, but the prognosis doesn't sound good, from what you've told us.
The fact she's starting to feel like you're less invested in the relationship, coupled with her existing anxiety issues, and the stress of distance on top, is not a good combination. Distance itself is enough to bring a relationship to its knees. I think perhaps what you need to ask yourself is how easy it would be to resolve the distance problem. Is it just a temporary state out of necessity, or would there still be an issue of separation after you're both finished with your course and moving on?
I don't think the age gap is really a big deal necessarily. I think generally once people have reached a certain age, they're about as "mature" as they're going to get, and it's a fallacy that you grow considerably wiser with age. You learn from mistakes and have invariably made more mistakes when you are older, but that doesn't mean someone younger is unable to relate. The core of it is, as you say, you feel like this isn't the right situation for you right now. If you're being honest with yourself, you just want to add a few more notches to your bedpost.
While I don't think the two of you are completely doomed, I don't think it would be wise to continue the relationship in its current course. Given the distance, maybe it's a good idea to suggest a break or some sort of open relationship arrangement while the two of you can't be physically together. Now, of course, I realise that if you suggest that, it has the potential to go down about as well as a sack of lead on a pool toy, but if you don't take some form of action you could well be heading for a miserable and heartbreaking split.
If you can persuade her it makes sense to temporarily put things on the back-burner until you're both in a position to make it a more real, physical relationship, you might just avoid that. In the mean time you'll get to boost your confidence and make up for some lost time. Naturally there's the risk either of you could meet someone else, and of course you have to accept that if you're going to be free to sleep with other people, so will she. But that's just the way these things go I'm afraid.
I think if you are both truly right for each other you'll overcome those things. If not, fate simply took its course.