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>> No. 18262 Anonymous ## Mod ##
5th March 2014
Wednesday 8:27 pm
18262 Please check the old pages for similar threads Locked Stickied
before creating a new one.
Failure to do so may result in angry shouting.
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>> No. 29363 Anonymous
2nd February 2020
Sunday 12:12 pm
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Go here if you want to talk to someone one-on-one: https://discord.gg/Nwn8b29

>> No. 23560 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 6:49 pm
23560 Minor angst and existential dread, Mk. I
We tend to have a lot of repeated threads here, but I also get the feeling people don't tend to post in /emo/ unless it's a big issue.

With this in mind I suggest that we have a thread for stuff that's got you down a bit and you need to get off your chest, without it being major enough to make an entire thread devoted to it. We can also use it as a go-to for minor relationship advice, work problems, social drama, and things like that.

Everyone gets down from time to time, let's put some Sisters of Mercy on and wallow together for a while.
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>> No. 29429 Anonymous
16th February 2020
Sunday 3:15 am
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That sounds awful. Way more than I'm dealing with, hope you are handling yourself well.

I think for me I've never faced death in this way before, I accepted the death of those of an older generation, as just a fact of life, it is like part of a story we all experiance, but this is someone a few years younger than me just blipped out probably without proper awareness of their situation, none of that overshadowing pending, or confrontation of death and coming to peace or struggling against it, just gone and it really highlights the futility and lack of meaning of it all for me. If there is a best way to move passed the pensiveness I'd love to know.
>> No. 29442 Anonymous
20th February 2020
Thursday 12:43 pm
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I feel as though, if I keep working at it nice and slowly, I'm going to come back online.
>> No. 29443 Anonymous
20th February 2020
Thursday 9:41 pm
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That's the spirit mate. Keep chipping away, Rome wasn't built in a day and all that. The longer you keep it up the easier it gets to keep it going.
>> No. 29444 Anonymous
21st February 2020
Friday 5:01 am
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If you don't want to discuss, that's fine, but I can't help but be curious about the "head trauma in his house alone". Did he fall down in the stairs, or in the shower? Something else?
>> No. 29445 Anonymous
21st February 2020
Friday 11:30 am
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No idea I'm afraid. Police found the body and that is all they said, and that it wasn't suspicious.

I suspect his parents got given a fuller picture (they were the ones who called the police also because he wasn't answering the door) but I've never spoken to them.

A friend talked to the local police about it to get confirmation I don't think they volunteered any additional information.

>> No. 29432 Anonymous
18th February 2020
Tuesday 1:52 pm
29432 Please Help
Please help lads, I feel I've lost control of my life.

I'm in a bit of a strange rut where I'm not massively happy, I have trouble focusing on things and I'm getting unfairly envious of friends and colleagues.

I have a job that I really enjoy for the most part, but sadly due to the sector, pays very badly for what I actually do. I don't feel that I have the focus, confidence or capacity in my current state to begin applying myself to other pursuits and I wouldn't even begin to know where to look.

Outside of work I do very little. My partner is a full time student (post-grad and she's older than me) so on top of doing all of the household stuff whilst she focuses on work, it also means that our household income is quite low due to her not working. This is where I get a bit jealous of others who are off doing interesting things or buying houses (I have about £20,000 saved for a deposit but cant get a mortgage on my sole income) as both of them work. I realise that it is unfair for me to feel this way, but I can't help but feel this way.

I struggle to find much enjoyment in things so other than work, domestic bits and cooking, I tend to spend a lot of my time sat drinking and watching YouTube videos/listening to music and getting all nostalgic when my partner is in bed.

Whilst not a huge drinker (only beers, not spirits) I have noticed that I have become consistent. Even if it is only two or three cans a night sometimes, I haven't had a day free or alcohol in five weeks. It hit me the other day that it could be a concerning amount. At what point is too much?

The shittier part of me losing control is a few blips I have had with escorts. Now and again I work away, and since October I have used them four times. No idea why, I didn't really enjoy the experiences, and felt awful afterwards for doing something like this against my partner. I have no idea what has come over me.

Sometimes I'm okay, sometimes I get angry and punch myself for no reason, sometimes I want to end it.
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>> No. 29433 Anonymous
18th February 2020
Tuesday 1:58 pm
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You've got depression mate. See your GP.

>> No. 29434 Anonymous
18th February 2020
Tuesday 4:17 pm
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>The shittier part of me losing control is a few blips I have had with escorts. Now and again I work away, and since October I have used them four times. No idea why, I didn't really enjoy the experiences, and felt awful afterwards for doing something like this against my partner. I have no idea what has come over me.

I assume you feel understimulated, lie the people who electrocute themselves in an otherwise empty room, and this makes life interesting. Or you want to be seen as the bad guy either by yourself or by others. Or because it gives an out from your relationship that is easier to processes than you just aren't satisfied.
>> No. 29440 Anonymous
19th February 2020
Wednesday 8:25 pm
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>Or because it gives an out from your relationship that is easier to processes than you just aren't satisfied.

How do you mean?

>> No. 29401 Anonymous
7th February 2020
Friday 3:47 am
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How comfortable do you feel opening up about your emotions?

I read something a little while back that has been playing on my mind ever since. In essence, it postulated that males generally aren't stunted emotionally as is often made out; women tend to be the 'gatekeepers' on the expression of feelings, in part because they tend to need a lot more emotional maintenence. The problem arises that men and women have different emotional needs, which means that male emotions can be largely alien to them and they can struggle to relate to it so they attribute little value to it. The end result is that men can feel very wary about exposing their true feelings and frailties around women, especially those they are romantically linked to.

The upshot of this is that men in long-term straight relationships are the ones who end up having to bottle up their emotions. They're likely to be spending less time with male friends (or even free time alone spent on hobbies) to simply let off steam and unwind; instead a lot of this time is dealing with the maintenance of dealing with their partner's emotional baggage, which I've seen dubbed as emotional labour, so tending to their own emotions constructively has to be packed away and put to one side. Sure, the woman might say that she wants her man to open up now and then but this often means in the narrow way that is acceptable to her, ideally so that it can be related to her own emotional needs and used to nourish them, whereby anything outside of this is at risk of being dismissed. Even worse, if you express the wrong emotions then she may start to think less of you and devalue your masculinity; you are expected to be her rock and for the family unit at all times.

I realise that this may come across as myopic, hopefully not like an MRA edgelord as I've feared as this isn't my intention whatsoever, but it has hit close to home ever since I read it. Perhaps that's just a reflection on the relationships I have been in more than anything else.
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>> No. 29410 Anonymous
7th February 2020
Friday 7:01 pm
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>I feel slightly snide mentioning it, but women experience about twice the rate of mental illness compared to men. If male ways of communicating and coping are so phlegmatic, why are we psychologically healthier overall than women? Why do we uncritically accept the idea that men should communicate more like women, while the inverse suggestion would be completely taboo?

The issue here is that the figure of women experiencing twice the rate of mental illness is hard to verify objectively. It's heavily influenced by differences in the self-reporting of symptoms between men and women, as well as societies pre-conceptions about mental illnesses in the genders (for example the 100-year-old prejudiced trope of diagnosing any women with the slightest nervous cough with hysteria still hasn't entirely gone away.)

If you look at the drastically higher suicide rates in men than in women, that's a good hint that diagnosed or self-reported rates of mental illness aren't the whole picture.
>> No. 29411 Anonymous
7th February 2020
Friday 7:17 pm
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>toxic masculinity

In my opinion the topic of so-called toxic masculinity shouldn't be anywhere near the discussion of male mental health. The phrase "man up" is gravely misunderstood, in my eyes; it isn't used to punish men for showing emotional fragility and is meant more as a prompt for action.

There's certainly aspects of lad culture in particular which are negative but I wouldn't say that it is significantly worse for male mental health than the way women actually treat male expressions of emotion, which itself differs from the way women have been conditioned to think they want to respond to male expressions of emotion. For example, I've had no issue with opening up about my feelings with my male mates, even if we'd never explicitly state that's what we're doing, but I've certainly been in relationships where I've had to be guarded about how I'm feeling or had to expend a fair amount of brain power contorting my emotions into a form that she'll be receptive to even if it doesn't accurately reflect what's going on in my mind, with the impression that my emotional needs are secondary to hers.
>> No. 29412 Anonymous
8th February 2020
Saturday 1:58 am
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>If you look at the drastically higher suicide rates in men than in women, that's a good hint that diagnosed or self-reported rates of mental illness aren't the whole picture.

Women are four times more likely to attempt suicide, but they're far less likely to die as a result. Make your own joke.

>> No. 29430 Anonymous
16th February 2020
Sunday 7:37 am
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I tried talking to my girlfriend last night about how I'm feeling like I have anhedonia and am just going through the motions with things, which could be a sign of depression. However, before I'd really got anywhere she immediately turned it around into "so what have I done wrong?" and made it all about her so I never had the chance to say anything of what I wanted to talk about.
>> No. 29431 Anonymous
17th February 2020
Monday 5:24 pm
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>I have anhedonia

I am of the opinion as someone who has had this, that if this isn't a result of some sort of drug withdrawl, you probably have lost sight of your own needs and wants somewhere along the way. you need a way of cutting loose, what that is for you personally I don't know, but you need to find your indulgence.

One of the things that surpised me, when I finally found the thing that I needed for me to be me and happy how profoundly unsupportive my now ex was of it.

I hate to go full MGTOW but I've found that the women I know do a lot of choosing about what they want in life, be it carears or partners (this part to an absurd degree now thanks to online dating), and men I know get by taking what they can get to survive, and just doing the things that makes their situation 'not worse'. I bring up the comparison only because men are broad brush stroke painted as having the power in society and honestly everything I've seen suggests the oppersite, they get by on what they can get.

>> No. 29418 Anonymous
13th February 2020
Thursday 1:00 am
29418 I'm bored.
The reason for my posting isn't as serious or as dramatic as many here, and I don't mean to seek anything but advice. Essentially I am bored with my life and I don't know what to do.

Ps the Toblerone logo has a bear in it.
In a couple of months I'll be 28. I work within the technology sector, on a graduate programme (I did a post grad slightly late). I earn a decent wage - 37k, made all the better by the cost of living here, and my career prospects are pretty decent, if I apply myself. I have a long term girlfriend of 6 years who earns less but is more settled in her career. I work a 9-5. My hobbies are, in a word, 'indoor', but despite this I'm reasonably healthy.

I've been doing this for a few years now, and after struggling post uni with all sorts of setbacks and tragedy, my very loving, very worrisome parents (or mum) are all very pleased and hopeful I continue as I do.

Notably, in the past 6 months I suffered the loss of a few family members. None of which were close to me, but for some reason this led me into what was a kind of, if not actual, existential crisis. I was on a heavy dose of everything and obsessed with death. I feared the non existence of it. I've worked my way out of that now, but one thing it's made me do is re assess my current life, it's made realise this is all very boring, and that perhaps I wasn't afraid of dying but of not living.

I don't care for the corporate ladder. I don't want to spend my life in an office, I don't care about earning more than I do. I want experiences, I want to learn, I want to contribute to something meaningful and rewarding. The problem is I just don't know what to do. Where to go? My Gf is very settled, she doesn't want to do anything crazy. She listens to me understandingly and can see sense in what I'm saying but at the end of the day all she wants to do is chill on the sofa. Big plans are for another time.

I love learning. I think that is my main stat, my strength. I'm good at learning, I have a broad knowledge but not a deep knowledge of anything. I'm technical. I like the idea of working remotely. But doing what?
I think what I'm going through is almost a universal thing people in more prigiledge societies go through, perhaps even particularly at my age. But I get the impression it's a worry that people either work out of, or eventually hide away.
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>> No. 29419 Anonymous
13th February 2020
Thursday 1:18 am
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>I think what I'm going through is almost a universal thing people in more prigiledge societies go through, perhaps even particularly at my age. But I get the impression it's a worry that people either work out of, or eventually hide away.

I think you've nailed it there honestly.

If you're realistic, what are the alternatives? You're always going to have to make money somehow, so unless you find a way to become completely financially independent you're never going to be able to escape that feeling that you're missing out on some other aspects of life by sacrificing your time to work, to the god of mamon.

I think this feeling is particularly acute for those of us who have grown up watching escapist TV shows and reading wonderful things about the outer world on the internet, seeing people's travelling photos on social media and the like. This is pure conjecture, but I suspect the existential angst was much less acute for the generations before us who largely grew up, settled, and died in their hometown; in essence because they would be less painfully aware what they were missing.

I was going to say to a lad in another thread but forgot about it- I think what truly gives people contentment in life is having something to work towards. Financially stable lad thought he was happy because he'd gotten himself a good job and started working out, but that's not really true- The thing that made him feel good was the feeling of progress. His savings account is almost directly analogous to watching an EXP bar slowly fill up, the "security" and "freedom" it offers really has little to do with it.

Throughout your life up until adulthood, settling in with your partner and ending up in that steady work week routine, you've always had a goal you're progressing to. Set yourself a new one.
>> No. 29420 Anonymous
13th February 2020
Thursday 5:12 am
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Try meditating in total silence for about 15 minutes a day on the fact that you don't really have any problems.
>> No. 29421 Anonymous
13th February 2020
Thursday 7:09 am
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>I want experiences, I want to learn, I want to contribute to something meaningful and rewarding. The problem is I just don't know what to do.

>I love learning. I think that is my main stat, my strength. I'm good at learning, I have a broad knowledge but not a deep knowledge of anything. I'm technical. I like the idea of working remotely. But doing what?

Just try something. It sounds daft and/or blindingly obvious, but figuring out what you want to do with your time is a process of trial and error. Get the course brochure for your local FE college, pick an evening class that sounds interesting and have a go. Whether you love it, hate it or just think it's kind of meh, you'll learn something about your interests and motivations that will help to guide you in a meaningful direction.
>> No. 29422 Anonymous
13th February 2020
Thursday 10:21 am
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Well start going on some holidays. Not beach crap, but places that might seem interesting or a bit different, just Easyjet destinations if you want to keep the cost down.
>> No. 29426 Anonymous
14th February 2020
Friday 3:07 am
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To elaborate from a still drunk but less bitchy perspective: the human mind has a tendency to grasp toward the future and chase flashy ephemera, ever seeking, ever grasping. It seems to me that a lot of people fall into the trap of perpetual grasping, when what they should really be doing is taking a step back and living in the eternity of the present moment (hippy-dippy language gradually making more sense the more you meditate). There's a nice Zen saying which goes something like this: "What, at this moment, is lacking?"

Try reading something from Eckhart Tolle or Michael Singer and see if their ideas make sense to you. I'm posting this while drunk so I'm far from a practicing preacher, but hopefully you can orient yourself toward a less superficial and materialistic direction.

Screenshot_2020-01-16 calcSD - Penis Size Percenti.png
>> No. 29299 Anonymous
16th January 2020
Thursday 9:44 pm
29299 https://calcsd.netlify.com/
Is this site accurate? I knew I was a bit longer than normal but I was a pencil dick.

If you're worried you're small you might not be.
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>> No. 29387 Anonymous
6th February 2020
Thursday 6:13 pm
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>Amongst the "normal vanilla folk" population generally they don't discuss or display their sex toys, you're not being judged for having them you're being judged for talking about them.

Except that's just not true. Vanilla, normal people talk about sex as much as anyone else; their values about it are simply different.

Not being into PVC and pony play is not the same thing as being an uptight prude.
>> No. 29388 Anonymous
6th February 2020
Thursday 6:24 pm
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>Vanilla, normal people talk about sex as much as anyone else; their values about it are simply different.

Normal people are just really crap at shagging. It's like someone who claims to like cooking but only knows one recipe. It's like someone who claims to like music but only owns two albums, both of which are compilations. They're not prudish, they're just boring.
>> No. 29404 Anonymous
7th February 2020
Friday 5:11 am
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Fleshlight is the trusted brand here.

Rubber fannies are good, but perhaps require a bit too much maintenance. I have no shame, but it's still a bit offputting to know you have to go to the sink to rinse the jizz out of it when you're done.
>> No. 29413 Anonymous
8th February 2020
Saturday 9:17 am
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I use mine in the bath or shower.
>> No. 29414 Anonymous
8th February 2020
Saturday 11:46 am
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I bought a couple from "your friend in Japan" and you do get what you pay for, it seems. The tenga egg things hold up surprisingly well but they're basically just the poshest of posh wanks but I'd avoid any of the novelty ones that promise more than "it's a pleasing hole".

It gets particularly annoying with toys that are closed on one end. You have to turn them inside out to clean properly and that just looks like a nasty prolapse.

>> No. 29373 Anonymous
6th February 2020
Thursday 12:44 am
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How do you fucking do it, lads? All I can see is the endless 5/2 cycle stretching out until I die (let's face it, if you're under 40 now there won't be a pension). It doesn't matter if I enjoy the job, it doesn't matter is I change job, it's just the concept of it being like this forever.

Sure, I get a few weeks a year off, but it's nothing compared to the amount of time I will spend at work.

I considered a Ph.D., but it will only delay the inevitable.

God, life is awful. Return me to the fucking void so I don't have to spend most of my waking life working so I can go on to spend most of my waking life working.
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>> No. 29398 Anonymous
7th February 2020
Friday 12:46 am
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But that's the point - we'd all like these things but they aren't realistic, so why not focus on things that are to make it a bit more manageable?

The point was 21k salary in the car at a bad point was a low, but those things helped and also led to preferable outcomes too, but you probably knew that.

There's always two types of responses to these threads: those that have some suggestions and those that just want to say how hopeless it is becuase of X,Y and Z which doesn't really provide any help.
>> No. 29399 Anonymous
7th February 2020
Friday 1:01 am
29399 OP
This is my first reply in the thread.

I don't mind my job at all - good conditions, alright pay (29k rising to 33k in a couple of years), and work I mostly enjoy, or can at least get stuck into enough to speed the 8 hours along. Still, it doesn't change the 5/2 fact.

On the frugality front, I've only just dug myself out of the debt that comes with moving in to somewhere properly for the first time, but am reliably putting away £300+ a month. Still, as has been mentioned before, at the wages I'm at now, I'll not be able to save anywhere near enough to fuck it off for any real length of time.

I also strongly disagree on the fronts of a) it being a "teenage" mindset, and b) that I should make peace with it; I think most people of all ages are dissatisfied with the system as it is (the national lottery is big for a reason), but are in too deep to change it. Kids, mortgage, etc mean you can't just fuck it off. Making space with it is accepting defeat, and I'm not ready to do that.

On the other hand, if the revolution comes tomorrow I'll just be doing a different 5/2, even the most utopian of fully automated gay space luxury communism will require a generation if not more of both the loss of individualism and hard fucking work.

There's no escape from it, and I can see why people take the one in seventeen million chance in the lottery because the appeal is so strong.

Realistically, I'll probably end up taking as much unpaid leave on top of my paid leave as I can per year, and seeing if I can work 9-hour shifts and take every other Friday off.

On the acid front: maybe. I don't think I would ever be in the right mindspace.
>> No. 29400 Anonymous
7th February 2020
Friday 1:30 am
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The dream is to get a job where you can work from home. Once you have one of them you can basically fuck off anywhere your passport will get you in and work from anywhere with an internet connection. I think that's about as close to freedom as any of us will find in this lifetime.

Most jobs of that type are probably freelance gigs; programming and writing, although journalism (which is currently dying in the clickbait gutter) used to be an option - maybe it still is some countries.

I can't name any other professions like this off the top of my head but there have to be a few, maybe try checking out some of those "digital nomad" websites and see if anyone who lives that "lifestyle" (Christ, I hate that word) works in an area that you can maybe shimmy yourself into.
>> No. 29403 Anonymous
7th February 2020
Friday 5:06 am
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I don't mind my job, in fact I enjoy it, and it's almost a hobby itself, but even when I had a more taxing one, my interests outside of work kept me from topping myself.

If you have something you're truly excited to go home and do, work seems trivial.
>> No. 29415 Anonymous
8th February 2020
Saturday 8:30 pm
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This is really depressing. I feel like I have no control over my life since last summer. I need to reset.

>> No. 29163 Anonymous
1st January 2020
Wednesday 8:49 pm
29163 How to thicken helmet skin?
I want to thicken the skin of my helmet to reduce the sensitivity of my benin. I've been circumcised which has helped to reduce sensitivity a bit but I want to reduce it more.

Would soaking it in surgical spirit every day help? Would it increase my chances of getting dick cancer or something?

What about rubbing it with sandpaper for a few minutes every day?
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>> No. 29347 Anonymous
28th January 2020
Tuesday 8:49 am
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>> No. 29348 Anonymous
28th January 2020
Tuesday 8:59 am
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Unless we address whatever underlying psychological problems are at play, here, I'd say this /emo/ thread is counterproductive.
>> No. 29349 Anonymous
28th January 2020
Tuesday 9:33 am
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>I could last for ages inside a real minge (if I ever get one).

What's the point now that you can't even feel it?
>> No. 29350 Anonymous
28th January 2020
Tuesday 9:51 am
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Don't be silly, of course I can feel it. It's just less sensitive now.
>> No. 29390 Anonymous
6th February 2020
Thursday 6:38 pm
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I've got bad news for you mate. Lasting for a long time in sex has fuck all to do with the physical sensation. You could have a cock made out of wood and she's still going to make a moaning whimper that'll have you spaffing yourself inside out like a 14 year old on his first time.

>> No. 29320 Anonymous
20th January 2020
Monday 3:39 am
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Just had a row with my mum like two days ago. Spoke to her about some shit from when I was at infants school. Being literally forced to play kiss-chase. Girls following me into the toilet out of "curiosity". This is stuff she knew about and told me I'd wish was still happening in 10 years, 25 years later and I've still never willingly taken my clothes off in front of anyone, I don't brush my teeth and I don't bathe because I learned to make myself as undesirable as possible. "This is why you'll never get a grandchild from me mum, etc" was a bit harsh but ffs.

The conversation turned to my dad beating me like an animal and stopping me from wearing glasses because "opticians is all liars". She didn't divorce him. Even back then she would have won in court if he actually got up and explained his actual beliefs about how glasses are a scam and he doesn't want his 6-year-old to wear them.

She goes quiet. Tries to change the subject. I don't let her. I explicitly tell her I forgive her for not being able to protect me but I can't stand it if she's still trying to rewrite history. She politely excuses herself and hangs up. I sit up drinking for two days and two nights.

In another two days I will get a vague "Are you feeling better today?" call/text. If I mention the previous conversation in any way she will disappear again for another few days. I'm sick of it.
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>> No. 29322 Anonymous
20th January 2020
Monday 6:49 am
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Mate, a lot of parents from our generation were incredibly unhealthy and clueless, your case seems exceptionally so. For your mother, it is probably coming across as re-traumatising. This is how they work; fall out, forget about it, try again a few days later and keep their head in the sand.

It doesn’t really matter how safe you make it for her (forgiveness, etc.) because she does not want to go there. It’s like trying to get someone that hates France to go to France— even if you promise fried breakfasts and brits as far as the eye can see, most won’t go.

I can’t imagine the weight of my mother’s guilt about what I endured, and I feel like even admitting that it was all her fault would destroy her. Uninspiring as it is, it’s been more fruitful for me to accept that she isn’t going to change and to stop forcing it.

I’m sure mine will never change and I’m not putting my affairs on hold waiting for her.
>> No. 29323 Anonymous
20th January 2020
Monday 7:29 am
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>It’s like trying to get someone that hates France to go to France— even if you promise fried breakfasts and brits as far as the eye can see, most won’t go.
>> No. 29324 Anonymous
20th January 2020
Monday 7:36 am
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I thought it was a good analogy.
>> No. 29325 Anonymous
20th January 2020
Monday 7:59 am
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It's a reasonable analogy to be coming up with at ten to seven in the morning I'll grant.
>> No. 29326 Anonymous
20th January 2020
Monday 12:13 pm
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I have seen some courtroom trials. Common criminals tend to be proud of their crimes, or to tell some bullcrap story. Child abusers and abusive parents, instead, deny their crimes with the utmost vehemence. When presented with solid proofs, they usually pretend to faint or to have an heart attack, only to be taken to the hospital and having their sentence read to them later. Later, they claim that they were set up and that the proofs did not exist or were falsified.

Memory is a survival tool, not just a recording. If some of your memories will imply that you are a total piece of shit that deserves to be flayed alive, you will delete those memories. On the contrary, painful memories of abuse will never be forgotten: imagine to eat some yellow and red round berry, and spending all the night with horrible stomach cramps. Forgetting about that berry is NOT conductive to survival. Remembering that kind of berries and the cramps IS conductive to survival, since you will never eat thoe berries again.

On a personal note, my mother was more or less like OP's mom. She spent several months vomiting and shitting black clumps before going to the doctors. They found a mandarin sized tumor in her bowels, and they spent a couple of years torturing her with useless therapies and cutting away pieces of her before she died. Maybe she wanted to die, maybe she felt that she deserved to suffer. I will never know. No one of her sons ever went to visit her.

>> No. 29296 Anonymous
16th January 2020
Thursday 8:22 pm
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Evening. It's been 6 months. She's always late. Arrange to meet at a tube station, she arrives 30 minutes late.
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>> No. 29297 Anonymous
16th January 2020
Thursday 8:27 pm
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Some people are just like that. It's an odd one because everyone is annoyed by it, but still sort of treat it as a quirk of personality rather than seeing it as both rude and incompetent, like it is. But these people never change.

We have one in our friend group, and basically we tell her we're meeting half an hour earlier than we are, because then she'll likely only hold us up by five or ten minutes rather than forty.
>> No. 29298 Anonymous
16th January 2020
Thursday 9:26 pm
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One time I snapped at my lass fairly loudly in Nando's. Her work was 2 mins walk away, and her shift started in 10 mins. The queue went all the way to the door.

I literally couldn't fathom how she could be so blase about signing up to be 20 minutes late to work, it genuinely fucked me off, even though the place was fairly relaxed but she was *always* late and I didn't even know the managers but I was just pissed off for some reason, she was fine with it.

Personally not fussed if someone is late, as long as they tell me. Left the house half hour after intended? No biggie, you let me know and I know I now have 30 mins spare to doss about or amuse myself. Keep me waiting? I turn into a fucking ogre. Don't like that about myself but it's just so fucking disrespectful that I can't keep a handle on it. Much better at calming down now but there's always the initial super stern text before getting over myself.

I've genuinely told her off before when she tells me she's meeting someone else and starts faffing about or letting herself get distracted. Straight up "This is incredibly disrespectful" and tangents thereof. Not sure if that helped or just made me look like a prick. Her friends seemed understanding of it, but hearing her say 'Well none of my friends are bothered by this' just led me to launch into "They're just too polite to say, you're literally wasting their time". But she's very free spirited and I'm essentially Stalin without the balls, so my reactions are definitely relatively extreme as well.

I'm still late for a lot of events, but at least managed to get it together for work when a friend of a friend gave me a job on the condition I was there 15 minutes early every shift for 3 months. That helped me a lot.

Anyway, have you talked about it? Does she keep you informed if she suspects she'll be late? What areas/with who does she display this behaviour with, and are there any areas where she's always on time/early/prompt?

My girlfriend has made huge leaps in improving communication, she's apologetic if she doesn't keep me informed (not in like, a terrified way, but just simply acknowledging it and saying sorry goes a huge way to making you feel valued).

Basically, if she can't be on time, and you value her enough for the other aspects of her personality to make up for it, then what she *can* do is keep you informed. That should really help your self worth and prevent resentment.
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>> No. 29138 Anonymous
21st December 2019
Saturday 10:08 pm
29138 Old man sack smell
I'm almost 40 and I've noticed that my ball sack is developing a smell like cheesy wotsits. Even after i shower it's still there.

Is this a normal part of getting older?
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>> No. 29271 Anonymous
11th January 2020
Saturday 11:01 pm
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Can you try it with Deep Heat and compare the experience?
>> No. 29272 Anonymous
11th January 2020
Saturday 11:05 pm
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I'll have a look and see if I've got some tomorrow.
>> No. 29274 Anonymous
12th January 2020
Sunday 9:01 am
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I've got Tiger Balm and Vick's Rub but no Deep Heat.
>> No. 29275 Anonymous
12th January 2020
Sunday 10:47 am
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Try the Tiger Balm.
>> No. 29276 Anonymous
12th January 2020
Sunday 11:17 am
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I'll try both, goddamn.

>> No. 29115 Anonymous
11th December 2019
Wednesday 6:57 pm
29115 Last two fights I've been in have left me feeling emasculated
Aight lads. tldr; was in a position to win 2 seperate fights, odds in my favour, and bitched out both times.

I'm a 6' skinnyfit guy in my late 20's, no formal fighting experience, who has generally dealt with their childhood anger issues and now smokes a lot of weed. This has left me generally placid and kind of slow to anger.

Fight 1

I was heading along a bridge after a night out, had just smoked a joint that my mate had to roll for me, as I couldn't do it standing up. This is extremely rare. Suffice to say I was quite fucked.

3 radgies heading my way on the side of the pavement, two girls and a guy. The lad was slightly taller than me and quite lanky. They started shouting at me, I took my earphones out and they were proper having a go and walking purposefully towards me. I backed off a bit and then the guy charged me.

He was about 10 metres away, so I had time to think. I was still quite confused. I waited til he got close as he was clearly going for a high punch, and then ducked, picked him up at the waist, and threw him over the barrier into the road. The girls then kind of ran towards me and started pushing me, and I just ignored the guy on the floor, ran across the other side, and started jogging down the bridge and rang the police.

I was on the phone to them, one girl caught me up and held me by the collar and told me not to call the police. I should have nutted her. She was maybe 16 though, but I feel I should have nutted her. I pushed her away and jogged again, but it gave the lad time to catch up. I did the exact same move again, but onto the pavement this time and much weaker. Both the girls grabbed me, he came over and punched me in the face.

I was sparked for a second, but still just confused. Ran again, eventually some driver pulled over and opened the door and I got in.
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>> No. 29244 Anonymous
11th January 2020
Saturday 9:49 am
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>>29240 Do an SIA Door Supervisor course

Strangely tempting, despite not ever expecting to do doors...

"The SIA are due to launch a new specification on 1st April 2020. As a result this is likely to become a 7 day training course. Further dates and the additional cost will be advertised once they have finalised there position."

7 days? crumbs...
>> No. 29245 Anonymous
11th January 2020
Saturday 1:07 pm
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I think they’re adding CCTV operation and advanced physical intervention to the course, as It licenses you for frontline close protection of individuals as well as manned guarding, i.e. clubs or factories. Not 100% sure on that, but when I did it it was 5 days.

You get distance learning material before the course starts, I went into it with a lot of notes already at hand. The exams are piss easy.
>> No. 29257 Anonymous
11th January 2020
Saturday 2:02 pm
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OP, I hear you. You can drive yourself nuts with what-ifs, especially the ones where you think "was I assertive enough" or where you feel like you didn't defend some line that shouldn't be crossed.

But I'm not sure there is a lesson to be learned from your scenarios, you handled yourself about as well as anyone could hope to in really strange and unexpected circumstances. You literally threw a lad and got away in a car relatively unscathed, and you called the police on an abusive person without anyone getting really hurt.

Maybe you were just listening to your gut instinct? It could be you subconsciously knew that the lanky boy didn't have a knife and was just out for a fight, and the other one didn't actually pose much of a threat to your girlfriend beyond being a cunt.

Honestly, you sound like someone that's probably been in fights before (reading to the end of your post just confirmed this). Over time you do develop some sense of who is genuinely out to cause you harm or if it's just something stupid getting out of hand. Of course getting punched or shoved is harmful, but it could be that you have a thick skin for physical pain and it just doesn't register for you the way you'd expect it to.

I agree with you, though, it's really hard to gauge proportional reactions and you're standing by a sound principle of self-preservation and protecting people you care about, especially when you've had horrible experiences or were in a lot of fights in the past, but there's not necessarily shame in not feeling angry when this happens. Rage is extremely unpleasant, at least for me, something that's also (at least a little bit) based in fear. It might be worth examining why you didn't feel fear? Could it just be there wasn't much to be afraid of? You said yourself, you felt more confused than threatened.

I'd also be really concerned about the fantasy violence elsewhere. Your issues with anger are still certainly there, even if it's a slow burn. It sounds like you've harnessed your anger in such a way that your idea of handling physical situations is to get pretty brutal about it. I honestly can't tell you whether this is right or wrong, it's an ugly grey area you shouldn't have to find yourself navigating. Try to think, though, what was the ideal outcome? It probably doesn't end with soccer kicking an abusive stranger or headbutting a young girl.

Again, I get it, you want to believe you have it in you to get nasty if a situation really called for it -- but it's worth considering that the times you describe, where you very clearly didn't, were the times things de-escalated with minimal harm to everyone.

More broadly, I'd also ask you to think about what kind of life you're leading and what kind of environment you're in where these things happen. Are you into nightclubs or other places where this drama normally takes off? If you know you're prone to either escalate these situations rapidly by throwing punches, or get annoyed with yourself when you don't, then could it be better to just remove yourself entirely from them?
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>> No. 29261 Anonymous
11th January 2020
Saturday 4:19 pm
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> What would you have done in the first event? If you already had the guy on the ground and he was attacking you for no reason?

The biggest no-no when you've got someone on the ground is to keep hitting them and the worst possible thing you can do is get up and put the boot in.

Essentially, when the lad charged you the second time after you already have taken him down once I would have taken him down harder, as opposed to more gently the way you did. The law is quite specific about someone clonking their bonce after you've punched them in the face, but there is almost no way to prove intent if someone charges you and during the scuffle you both fall to the ground and he cracks his coconut - as long as you haven't been physically aggressive, i.e. punched him in the face.

Sage because all of this is pretty silly and we shouldn't go around with pre-prepared plans to inflict injury onto others in our heads all the time.
>> No. 29273 Anonymous
12th January 2020
Sunday 12:07 am
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Testosterone drops drastically around your late 20s. You're just chilling out.

>> No. 28846 Anonymous
24th August 2019
Saturday 10:06 am
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Has anyone here managed to cure their hard-flaccid?

I'm nearly 40 and I've had this since i was about 12. I think it was caused by bad masturbation technique in which I'd tense up my kegel muscles to achieve quicker orgasm.

Is it too late to cure now?
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>> No. 28877 Anonymous
26th August 2019
Monday 11:40 am
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Yesterday I bought eggs for the first time in ages and i think it's because of this thread.
>> No. 28879 Anonymous
26th August 2019
Monday 4:21 pm
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Big Egg shilling on .gs, m8. What a world.
>> No. 28880 Anonymous
26th August 2019
Monday 6:57 pm
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Big Egg shelling
>> No. 29014 Anonymous
18th October 2019
Friday 1:16 pm
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>> No. 29270 Anonymous
11th January 2020
Saturday 10:14 pm
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This daily workout should help open up the pelvic area.

>> No. 29205 Anonymous
9th January 2020
Thursday 11:41 pm
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In your experience, do most women prefer getting licked or fucked?

t. not very experienced
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>> No. 29234 Anonymous
10th January 2020
Friday 10:26 pm
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>> No. 29235 Anonymous
10th January 2020
Friday 10:44 pm
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Look, I get it. I get the anus is sensitive, and I get that the rectum can be tighter than a fanny, and I get that stimulating the prostate is pleasurable (apparently). But it's still the HOLE WHERE SHIT COMES OUT. How do people get past that? Or god forbid actually have coprophilia.
>> No. 29236 Anonymous
10th January 2020
Friday 11:41 pm
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Fetlife, 12-step groups, psychiatric outpatient services.


Just wash your bum m8. Have you seen/smelled/tasted some of the disgusting effluent that comes out of fannies?
>> No. 29238 Anonymous
11th January 2020
Saturday 12:27 am
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Oh mate. Get the soap out, get in the shower, go to fucking town with your fingers. Enema with soapy water for good measure beforehand, but then yeah just clean that fucker out several times over. It's not like shit is secreted from the pores of your sphincter.

Then when she sits on your face it's like you can lick anything, it's fantastic. Wouldn't do ass to mouth, but just the outside and an inch or so inside? Yeah, sign me up.

And look for fetish communities or get lucky. Somehow every girl I've dated has been bloody kinky, possibly because I'm fucking weird and anyone willing to sign up has underlying issues. So yeah, try being a bizarre cunt too.

Be warned, don't expect hookups unless you're super fucking fit and charming, and even then the girls on there who want to hook up are usually pretty uninspiring. Think of it as a new group of friends who you may well end up getting intimate with.
>> No. 29239 Anonymous
11th January 2020
Saturday 1:31 am
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Most vaginal discharge is pretty fucking minging when you think about it, but I doubt that stops you. And you can't enema all the mucus out of a fanny.

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