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>> No. 25506 Anonymous
6th September 2017
Wednesday 10:57 am
25506 How do you be less boring?
Lads.

I'm a boring cunt.

I mean, this really hit me when a drunk girl shouted it at me in a club, but it's true.

I like graphic design of the 1960s and road signs. The sort of music I listen to involves polite headbanging and absolutely no dancing.

I go to societies at university to escape the crippling loneliness I feel most of the time, and any time they hold a night out I force myself to go, but I can't dance. I just freeze up; I end up stood there leaning against a wall or a pole or whatever (with my earplugs in, I struggle to hear anything when the volume is too loud, it's just like static). People will grab my arms, etc, trying to get me to dance, but I can't. I wish I could, but I can't.

I don't even like drinking any more; I used to get quite drunk on the regular but it doesn't make me any more interesting, it just amplifies the negative thoughts inside my head, and makes me feel physically like shit too -- I used to be hangover-proof but as I'm discovering that fades very quickly with age.

I tried some of the devil's lettuce (in a jurisdiction where it is legal), and I suppose like with any mood altering substance you need to be in the right frame of mind to start with or it won't end well -- it didn't, I hated it. I felt out of control and just panicked.

Is there any way out of this? Finding friends with similar interests is difficult, and the few that I do find are like me: largely dull.

What can I do? How do I force myself to enjoy dancing, going out, etc? I don't want to be the boring cunt any longer.
Expand all images.
>> No. 25507 Anonymous
6th September 2017
Wednesday 11:56 am
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>>25506

I think you are less boring than you think. You clearly have interests they just aren't 'very cool' in they don't meet whatever tick box the lowest common denominator considers cool. Fidget spinners, dabbing and uploading video that makes it look like you could flip a bottle and getting it to land on the lid first time are considered cool at the moment, don’t listen to what people think is cool, people are idiots. Do you really want to define yourself through validation of what other people think of you? That way lies way more insecurity than you could imagine.
Own the fact that you like graphic design of the 60s and road signs, don't be ashamed of it. Academia is driven forwards by people having niche obsessive interests that only a handful of people really care about. I think you have it backwards as well what makes talking about something interesting, isn’t the subject itself, it is the passion behind it and the craft in the framing of the subject, the content itself actually doesn’t matter.

I'm sure as a student not liking going out clubbing seems like a glaring omission, but give it 5 years and hardly any of your peers will be interested in 10 years they'll treat it like they can't understand why they even did it in the first place.


In terms of doing better socially I recommend a read of how to win friends and infuence people, if noting else it is a interesting read. and it might be something to talk about with other people.
>> No. 25508 Anonymous
6th September 2017
Wednesday 12:06 pm
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Are you boring, or are you the kind of person that boring people call boring?

If you don't like going out boozing and dancing, then don't do it. There are an infinite number of ways to spend your free time, most of which are vastly more interesting than standing in a darkened room full of drunkards. Volunteer at a museum, crew a yacht, help to restore a steam engine, go rambling, play board games, learn to paraglide, whatever tickles your fancy. You can have a thriving social life without ever setting foot in a nightclub.

The great thing about being a dull man is that your life is on a broadly upwards trajectory. Middle age and retirement offer myriad possibilities for people with passions and interests, but offer only tedium and decline for those who don't. Dull men don't really have middle-aged crises, because they were born middle aged. Once you've come to terms with the fact that you're not one of the cool kids, it's plain sailing all the way.
>> No. 25513 Anonymous
6th September 2017
Wednesday 7:19 pm
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>>25506
>I'm a boring cunt.
So fucking what.
Do what you enjoy doing. If you're lonely find other people who enjoy the same things as you. If you're bored, that's a completely different problem.
You don't have to define yourself according to the lowest-common-denominator shite that others your age call fun.

I'm also boring. I like bonsai and building model steam engines, I'm especially boring because I don't have a workshop or a garden to do either of these in, but I'm still happy.

Here's a very boring video:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fw-7oKGI5uI
>> No. 25514 Anonymous
6th September 2017
Wednesday 8:02 pm
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>>25513
I like that video very much. Always wanted to build a steam engine. Thanks lad.
>> No. 25515 Anonymous
6th September 2017
Wednesday 8:25 pm
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>>25513

A thousand times this.

OP, don't listen or take to heart whatever drivel that vapid, drunken hag has tried to spit at you. Forge your own path and you will be happy, I promise you.
>> No. 25516 Anonymous
6th September 2017
Wednesday 9:14 pm
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I think people find me boring, but whenever I'm with someone like that I always find that the onus is on me to start the conversation and keep it flowing; otherwise they'll put no effort in and just sit there in silence bored instead.
>> No. 25522 Anonymous
6th September 2017
Wednesday 10:27 pm
25522 sorry for the long link.
lad, I like steam engines as much as the next person on here it seems. There used to be a website called Maccsteam, he made miniature steam boilers out of copper pipe. The site appears to not exist anymore but it appears that his pictures do. So in the spirit of this, I present to you a google search link.

https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=maccsteam&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjqhJ-rv5HWAhWlIMAKHeykB30QsAQIMw&biw=1920&bih=1012
>> No. 25528 Anonymous
6th September 2017
Wednesday 11:36 pm
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>>25522
https://maccmodels.co.uk/live-steam-fittings.html

Cor blimey. I thought building my own drones was cool. Thanks lad (for the bankruptcy and lost weekends).
>> No. 25576 Anonymous
9th September 2017
Saturday 5:00 pm
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Mate, do not judge yourself by what some callous slag will shout at you in a club. You're sensitive so it bothered you and led you to question whether she really had a point. This is a beautiful quality, but good fucking God if there's anything I've learned as I've gotten older it's that you cannot let yourself be swayed by the passing comments of others.

You like to belong to pretty thoughtful communities, where people probably only criticise others with very good reason.

To many people this is an alien concept, and I assure you there are a shocking number of people who will say the first thing that comes to their head. You will become an infinitely worse person if you try to heed the opinions of people like this.

Dancing. Does. Not. Make. You. Interesting. Find other ways to express yourself.
>> No. 25578 Anonymous
9th September 2017
Saturday 6:55 pm
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Ha! I just got it. The OP's image. Boring.
>> No. 25587 Anonymous
9th September 2017
Saturday 9:26 pm
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>>25528

Ah, it's not the same as it used to be.

I appreciated the old site where he made them. Photo attached.

>>25576

>>You like to belong to pretty thoughtful communities, where people probably only criticise others with very good reason.

Much like this one. The best of all image boards.
>> No. 25588 Anonymous
9th September 2017
Saturday 10:21 pm
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This thread is sounding a bit MGTOWy.
>> No. 25589 Anonymous
9th September 2017
Saturday 10:44 pm
25589 OP
Thanks for the responses, lads. I suppose I worded it somewhat wrongly - I don't want to lose the interests I have, but just like drinking beer there has to be a way to start to enjoy, or at least look like I'm enjoying dancing/clubbing/etc.

It's not that I don't necessarily have friends with weird interests, I also have a few people with whom I meet and drink in the pub with regularly (as I say, at societies -- I usually try and hide my more eccentric interests), but I usually get viewed as the "boring one" for not coming out to clubs; the few times I do convince myself it's a good idea, the situation in OP happens to me.

While I shouldn't care what people think of me, I would just like to mesh a bit better with these groups of people, who are otherwise great people, but it feels like I'm never truly a part of the group since I always go home early, never get *as* wrecked, etc.

>>25588
Only to you, lad.
>> No. 25591 Anonymous
10th September 2017
Sunday 12:25 am
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>>25588

Do you think promoting self confidence and encouraging hobbies is somehow A)pejorative and B)gender specific?
>> No. 25592 Anonymous
10th September 2017
Sunday 1:14 am
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>>25591
Why have you labelled them A) and B)?
>> No. 25594 Anonymous
10th September 2017
Sunday 1:42 am
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>>25592

Because:
Firstly I want too
B) why not
iii) it highlights them as separate points to be addressed independently.
4) it's a habit I've fallen into from meetings.
>> No. 25598 Anonymous
10th September 2017
Sunday 4:19 am
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>>25589

Nobody will give a shit by your third year. The appeal of boozy madlads fades fairly rapidly when bank balances start running low and finals and theses are looming. Boring turns to reassuringly level-headed when things get tough. If you're so determined, there's nothing to it but to pretend - imagine you're an actor playing the part of someone who likes dancing and drinking.
>> No. 25599 Anonymous
10th September 2017
Sunday 10:19 am
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Thing I can't really understand is that OP is getting depressed about the fact he can't dance. Are lads actually expected to dance nowadays? When I was a teenager going out to clubs, dancing was actively discouraged unless you were already wankered. Dancing sober meant you were some kind of poof.

You're not boring because you can't dance. You're supposed to stand in a circle with your mates taking the piss out of each other. The alcohol is the primary focus of a Night Out, everything else is just a pretence to stop people realising we have a deeply embedded national drinking problem.

Even if you can't be arsed with going out, what's wrong with inviting some of your more interesting/nerdy classmates round your digs and getting a couple of crates of Stella in? The most fun I've had with a bunch of students was getting sloshed and playing a game of Warhammer in character as Grey Seer Thanquol. That's not exactly normie behaviour now is it.
>> No. 25600 Anonymous
10th September 2017
Sunday 1:00 pm
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>>25599
>You're supposed to stand in a circle with your mates taking the piss out of each other
In a club? good luck hearing anything.
>> No. 25602 Anonymous
11th September 2017
Monday 9:47 pm
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>>25600

You lean over and yell directly in each other's ears.

Christ what is wrong with the youth of today. I mean you're used to just fucking snapchatting each other anyway right?
>> No. 25603 Anonymous
12th September 2017
Tuesday 1:28 am
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>>25602
I can't speak for all youth of today but I tend to avoid any environment where you have to shout to be heard by someone standing next to you, exposure to which health guidelines will tell you causes permanent hearing loss.

If you want to stand in a circle with your mates taking the piss out of each other what's become so unpopular about the pub?
>> No. 25604 Anonymous
12th September 2017
Tuesday 1:38 am
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>>25603
You can hear each other in the pub.
>> No. 25605 Anonymous
12th September 2017
Tuesday 2:14 am
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>>25599

Girls like dancing. It really doesn't matter if you're 'good' at it (not entirely sure what constitutes good nightclub dancing anyway). I've never found going out to clubs very interesting, but the old dance like nobody's watching thing does work. I've made friends and girlfriends by being a tit on the dance floor in my uni days. I kind of thought that was the whole point. It seems very depressing to stand around in a circle trying to have a conversation in a club.
>> No. 25606 Anonymous
12th September 2017
Tuesday 9:12 pm
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>>25605
Exactly it - almost nobody is actually good at it, the idea is simply to have a good time. Embrace your inner tit.
>> No. 25607 Anonymous
13th September 2017
Wednesday 1:58 am
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>>25606

"Dancing like a tit" or "embracing your inner tit" sounds like something Mad For It lads would have done while 'aving it large before coming home to watch reruns of TFI Friday in the nineties.

Personally I like to embrace my inner lad who just had four pills and a gram of coke. I do this by having four pills and a gram of coke. I have literally seen predatory women physically repulsed by the shear existential horror of my mad gurning visage as I whirl across the dance floor like a chemical dervish dragged helpless behind the riptide slipstream of infinite possibilities.
>> No. 25627 Anonymous
14th September 2017
Thursday 6:13 pm
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>>25603

>I can't speak for all youth of today but I tend to avoid any environment where you have to shout to be heard by someone standing next to you, exposure to which health guidelines will tell you causes permanent hearing loss.

I can't tell if you are intentionally and ironically proving my point, or not.

I mean if this is the sort of thinking OP does then no wonder people think he's boring. Dancing is the least of his worries.

Also, if my memory is right (may not be) then most pubs still tend to play obnoxiously loud and shit music all night on a Friday and Saturday. Something about the lack of communication making people drink more. Incidentally, this is how I ended up taking up smoking.

OP, have you considered starting smoking? That's where you find all the most interesting people.
>> No. 25628 Anonymous
14th September 2017
Thursday 6:49 pm
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>>25627
> have you considered starting smoking

This is great advice - one of the best things about smoking is meeting and gossiping with people on fag breaks - it's the hardest bit of it to give up.
>> No. 25633 Anonymous
14th September 2017
Thursday 7:52 pm
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>>25627

Hearing loss is no joke. I used to play guitar for a living, which left me with moderate hearing loss and severe tinnitus. Put your fingers in your ears and whistle as loudly as you can - that's what I hear all the time.

>Also, if my memory is right (may not be) then most pubs still tend to play obnoxiously loud and shit music all night on a Friday and Saturday.

In the trade, they call it "vertical drinking". Crank the music up so people can't hear, take out most of the chairs and tables so people have to stand with their drink in hand. Wetherspoons and Sam Smith's pubs have a strict no-music policy, which I can only applaud them for.
>> No. 25634 Anonymous
14th September 2017
Thursday 8:02 pm
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>>25633

>Hearing loss is no joke. I used to play guitar for a living, which left me with moderate hearing loss and severe tinnitus.

I'm only a weekend warrior myself, but you're daft for not having worn earplugs lad. No offense.
>> No. 25636 Anonymous
14th September 2017
Thursday 9:11 pm
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>>25607
No it's just about not caring what other people think and having fun. Don't think there is anything we have to over-analyse about enjoying dancing, whatever your skill level is.
>> No. 25637 Anonymous
14th September 2017
Thursday 11:16 pm
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>>25634

In those days, nobody knew any better.
>> No. 25638 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 7:23 pm
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>>25633
> Wetherspoons and Sam Smith's pubs have a strict no-music policy, which I can only applaud them for.

I've always been given to understand that this because music licenses cost too much, not due to any real desire to increase national conversation levels. Then again, the only people I've ever seen in a 'spoons who weren't stone facedly drinking in a state of utter silence and metaphysical solipsism were the staff and a few groups of students getting loaded up for a night out.
>> No. 25639 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 8:40 pm
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>>25638
What? So I can't play my collection of music in a pub I run? Or a youtube playlist?
>> No. 25640 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 8:41 pm
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>>25639
No.
>> No. 25641 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 8:48 pm
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>>25639
Strictly speaking, not without a PRS license, no. They even go after companies that play music in the office. I worked somewhere where we actually got the license, just so we could legally play Sonos in the office on a Friday.

https://www.prsformusic.com/licences/playing-music-at-work
>> No. 25642 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 8:53 pm
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>>25639
If you don't have the licensing rights to a piece of music then you cannot play it in a public place. That's the law. Otherwise artists (or rather, their labels) don't receive their due royalties for their work.

To keep things simple the vast majority of recording artists and subcontract the business of music licensing to the Performing Right Society, or PRS For Music Ltd. They collect a standard fee from you, and then you can play Radio 2 as much as you like in your pub.
>> No. 25643 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 9:10 pm
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Shame torrenting hasn't killed the music industry.
>> No. 25644 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 9:42 pm
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>>25643

As long as people are willing to nosh another person off just so that they will maybe possibly might consider asking someone else if the maybe possibly could listen to the first 10 seconds of their song, there will always be a music industry.
>> No. 25645 Anonymous
15th September 2017
Friday 9:57 pm
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>>25644

The industry is a shitshow, but I'll defend PRS to the death. Major, independent or unsigned, PRS fight to make sure that musicians get paid. For struggling artists at the bottom of the ladder, those quarterly cheques are often the only thing keeping the wolf from the door.
>> No. 25647 Anonymous
16th September 2017
Saturday 2:27 pm
25647 OP
Well this took an interesting turn.

I wear invisible earplugs to places like this as I have sensitive hearing anyway. They aren't the bright orange sticky-outy ones, so no-one can tell unless they stare into my ear.

If I don't wear them, I have to ask people to repeat things past the point of what they said being relevant.

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