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>> No. 25856 Anonymous
5th December 2017
Tuesday 11:41 pm
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honestly lads I've no idea what to do on this.

25 yo, with a girl for the past 4 years, my first girlfriend. I do genuinely love her, but she's the only girl I've slept with. A part of me wants to leave her and go out and shag myself silly, have a bit more adventure to my life at a time where I've finally gained the skills to do it, but I can't really imagine life without her. I've proclaimed my life-long love more than once, and when saying it, I meant it. I do love her. But its a long fucking time man, forever. She certainly isn't perfect, but then who is? I've been minorly unfaithful in the past and it fucking *hurt* me afterwards, otherwise I'd settle for just cheating on her occasionally. I try and take life with a practical view or cold, depending on your sensibilities, and if you could live happily with a wife and keep your self entertained with sidechicks then isn't that really the way? This is more one-sided to "leave her" than it really is. I genuinely love the girl, I've genuinely thought happily about our future. I'm so fucking unsure. I know going out there and chasing other girls is nothing but fleeting but at the same time so is fucking life. If I'm frustrated at 25 imagine 40? I'll be wanking it in the shed for fucks sake, except I'll be fat and bald. I shouldn't make decisions drunk, I've learnt that at least, I usually feel different sober. I live with the girl, it isn't easy.
Expand all images.
>> No. 25857 Anonymous
5th December 2017
Tuesday 11:46 pm
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It's pretty normal to feel like this, all I can really say is that you're being silly, and you'll never be happier shagging random birds. You feel like you're missing out, but on what exactly? What it's like to shag someone a different shape to your missus? Who fucking cares?

If you're happy with your woman, stick with it, seriously. You'll live without knowing what it's like to tongue a stranger in a club, or have shitey tinder conversations with 20 of them. Trust me.
>> No. 25859 Anonymous
5th December 2017
Tuesday 11:54 pm
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>>25857
A part of me looks at your post and thinks "I can have both and there's no reasonable explanation as to why that'd be wrong". Is that normal too? Am I cunt for thinking this, let alone acting on it?
>> No. 25861 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 12:16 am
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>>25859

Well, most people would say cheating is bad and you'd be a bastard for doing it, and I suppose I would too, but that's not really stopped me in the past.

The thing is, you've already said that being minorly unfaithful caused you great emotional pain and presumably guilt, so I wouldn't recommend it as an avenue for you. Plenty of people can have their cake and eat it, but as you spent half the OP talking about how in love you are with your girlfriend, I cannot see that ending well for you personally.

I'm not here to say cheating is wrong, but it seems to me you'd have a very hard time living that sort of life. So it's up to you to either realise that fanny is fanny and the relationship is worth a lot more than that, or leave your girlfriend in pursuit of other women. Which, again, I can tell you from personal experience, isn't recommended.
>> No. 25862 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 12:16 am
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This is why god invented prostitutes.
>> No. 25863 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 12:31 am
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>>25861
Temporarily guilty, I didn't tell her about it. It was only minor things like necking girls in clubs. I 100% know that this relationship is more valuable than anything else, but assuming I could get over my guilt, it would be the most logical thing to do.

>>25862
True, very true...
>> No. 25864 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 12:51 am
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>>25863

Well, presuming you can get over it, I'd say you should shag a couple of prostitutes to get it out of your system. There's more brothels and other such things around than you'd think. Or take a little sex-tourism holiday.
>> No. 25865 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 2:25 am
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Would she freak out if you asked her to let you shag dutch hoe?
>> No. 25866 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 6:46 am
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Fucking hell, the prose style made me think this was written by a teenager rather than a twenty-five five year old. I guess I'm not down with the kids anymore.

Honestly, you don't sound mature enough for a long-term relationship. Grow a pair and break up with her. Don't put it off just because it'd be inconvenient and difficult for a relatively short period of time. Bite the bullet. You only think the relationship is great because it's your first and only one.
>> No. 25867 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 8:46 am
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Leave her so she can find a boyfriend who isn't a man-child.
>> No. 25868 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 1:34 pm
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That's always a tough one, the first relationship, and with the first person you've ever had sex with to boot.

Your first relationship rarely lasts "forever". Very few people go on to marry their first love. The reasons are manifold, and every first relationship fails for its own reasons.

But I guess the underlying common theme is that people just aren't satisfied with the prospect of having one romantic partner all your life anymore. In our times, serial monogamy is the preferred model, and many people feel like they lose out if they don't at least have a few different partners before they decide to settle down with somebody.

And that's both a good thing and a bad thing. The good thing is, having had a few different relationships, you will be more aware of the kind of person you are, and of what is important to you in a romantic relationship. You gain life experience. On the other hand, my nan for example is from a small town in rural Cornwall. And in those days, you usually met your future husband some time around age 18 to 20, and then you got married soon after and stayed together for the rest of your lives. My nan was married to my granddad for 53 years before he passed on due to heart failure, and they spent nearly every single day together during that time. The approach to a relationship was much different from today, in that your concept of it was that you met one person, got married to them, and tried to make things work out with that person for better or worse. Then again, it'd be naive to think that married people didn't end up having affairs with somebody else at some point during such a marriage.

My advice to OP would be: try to figure out what it really is that puts you off about the prospect of spending the rest of your life with your current girlfriend, or at least a substantial amount of time of it. Is it just the thought that you might be missing out by just committing to that one person, or can you actually not see yourself with her at age 40, having spent around a dozen years married to each other with a mortgage and kids? Is it HER that you can't see yourself with, despite your declared love for her?

I kind of have a gut feeling that you will end up separating. Your urge to sow wild oats elsewhere looks strong enough to me that you will eventually give in to it and not look back. But whatever the future holds for you, embrace it.
>> No. 25869 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 2:08 pm
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>>25866

>You only think the relationship is great because it's your first and only one.

This is an important point. When you start out in your romantic relationship history, you've got no real frame of reference to judge the quality of your relationship by. You might find yourself in a pretty shit relationship with somebody that is worlds apart from you personality wise, but you are going to accept it, or maybe not even be aware of it at all, because you've got no idea what an actual functioning relationship is, between two people who complete each other. And the real eye opener will only come when you split up and do meet somebody who is really more up your alley.

When my first girlfriend broke up with me (indeed because we were just too different but needed two years to work that out), the very first date I had after her with somebody else, we ended up spending six hours sat in my car the whole night, literally until dawn, just talking about this, that, and the other. We spent six fucking hours in my car, parked along a country lane in the middle of nowhere, without interruption, not counting toilet breaks. I could not recall a single time that I'd spent six hours with my ex girlfriend simply talking at all. In hindsight, getting any kind of conversation going with her was a real effort compared to just sitting next to a quite random lass in my car and letting the conversation flow naturally. Here was this girl that I had only met days ago, and you really couldn't get us to shut up together.

It was that night that I realised just how poorly matched I had been with my ex. It made getting over her a great deal easiert. As for that other lass, well, we only saw each other a few more times and left it at that. We just had different ideas about what we wanted from a partner and a relationship. But that, too, is life experience. Which you don't gain from sticking it out against the odds with a first girlfriend who just isn't "the one" for you.
>> No. 25875 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 9:09 pm
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Honest opinion from someone who's ten years older than you and has been with the same lass for some 11+ years now; if I could do it all again I would do it all differently. I honestly deeply regret not playing the field and shagging around more before settling down.

Obviously I don't know if I'm just a sad cunt of if this is a case of "the grass is always greener" but it's honestly how I'd feel. I'd give my left nut to be able to rewind the clock back twelve years or so and do it all again.
>> No. 25876 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 10:05 pm
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>>25875
I think you're underestimating how important so many years of shared experiences are and how hard it is to get back on the wagon later in life.
>> No. 25878 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 10:44 pm
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>>25875
How sex is this important to other people still baffles me. Having been in a long term relationship and having had something very meaningful, meaningless sex feels exactly like what it says on the tin, completely meaningless.
>> No. 25879 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 10:49 pm
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>>25878
I think it's a cultural thing, I'll blame the Americans, for making promiscuity a high-status thing particularly for men. People want it for the idea of it, not because it's good in itself.
>> No. 25880 Anonymous
6th December 2017
Wednesday 11:52 pm
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>>25879

>People want it for the idea of it, not because it's good in itself.

There is still a difference between deciding to have only very few partners in your life, out of personal choice, and getting hitched with the first bird you've ever shagged.

I haven't been in bed with that many different women; slept with three, had juvenile gropes under the sheets without actual intercourse with two more. While my best friend was getting laid left, right and centre in our teenlad days.

I'm about as un-promiscuous as you can imagine. And I wouldn't have it any other way. Because indeed I don't want sex to be just the meaningless physical act. And yet, I am thankful that I slept with those three women. If I met a lass now who would end up being the last person I'd ever have sex with for the rest of my life, then I would be ok with it. Both because I've had sex with other women before, and also because I wouldn't feel comfortable being with so many different women.
>> No. 25881 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 12:04 am
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>>25880
After two dozen or so I'm just left questioning my ability to build any sort of meaningful connection with another human being.
>> No. 25882 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 1:47 am
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>>25881
Same, but with zero.
>> No. 25883 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 2:36 am
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>>25876
> I think you're underestimating how important so many years of shared experiences are

Lad. How can I underestimate the importance of something if I already have it and know its importance to me? If you'd have said "you're overestimating how good life is with a new lass in your bed every week" you might have had a point. Anyway this is /emo/ so I'll curtail this potential cuntoff before it really begins.

>>25878
> How sex is this important to other people still baffles me.

Are you a eunuch?

> Having been in a long term relationship and having had something very meaningful, meaningless sex feels exactly like what it says on the tin, completely meaningless.

I've also had both, sometimes on the same day. That said I definitely feel like I would have had a happier life gorging myself on the Late Night Kebab of meaningless sex in my youth before settling for the Cheeky Nandos of a committed relationship in my thirties.

Also just because you haven't been in a relationship for ten years, does that make the sex meaningless? I've had flings of months or even weeks which I still remember very fondly.

>>25879
> People want it for the idea of it, not because it's good in itself.

Much like love itself, or for that matter, cocaine.
>> No. 25885 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 2:55 am
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>>25856

> I live with the girl, it isn't easy.

This is the real bugger. The one piece of relationship advice that I wish I'd got was "don't move in with a girl until you've been going out seriously for at least a year". Once you move in together it takes a serious amount of effort to untangle your lives and move on.
>> No. 25886 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 3:30 am
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>>25883
>Are you a eunuch?

Yeah you got me. It's not that I tend to value a deeply personal and meaningful relationship more than random hookups, no, it's that I literally have no want for sex at all.
>> No. 25887 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 6:01 am
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>>25886

This is just in-denial speak for "I couldn't get laid if my life depended on it, so I pretend I'm waiting for my soul mate while pretending to myself that life is like a shitty late-nineties romantic comedy".
>> No. 25889 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 9:53 am
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>>25883
>How can I underestimate the importance of something if I already have it and know its importance to me?
>> No. 25890 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 11:57 am
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Eh, talk to your mates about it. Neither you nor I (us?) have a proper frame of reference for whether your relationship is worth missing out on single things or whether you have just been incredibly lucky to find someone.

Personally I wouldn't chuck a 4 year relationship unless I really feel like I'm being suffocated. You've passed the third year hump so something must be working and the single life really isn't all it is cracked up to be compared to sharing your life with someone who will watch Star Trek with you.

>>25887
Pretty telling leap you just made on the other lads statement, especially for 6am on a weekday. Is something wrong?
>> No. 25891 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 12:19 pm
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>>25885

> Once you move in together it takes a serious amount of effort to untangle your lives and move on.

My brother moved in together with a lass that he had been with for two years. Their relationship started deteriorating soon after. To the point where she started shagging one of my brother's best friends behind his back. Oftentimes in their flat, in their double bed. While my brother was working late or on business trips. Imagine not only going to sleep at night with somebody who just hours earlier had sex with one of your best friends, but in your own bed to boot. My brother said in hindsight he should have suspected something when his girlfriend started changing the sheets twice a week sometimes. He even made jokes about it with her, like, "Covering your tracks so I don't find out about your secret lover, eh?". Being the cold hearted bitch that she was, she even played along with it and would counter those jokes with a grin and say, "Oh, absolutely. What do you think?"

The separation itself was pretty quick when my brother found out for real. He did start suspecting something, so he asked the woman next door to keep an eye on things whenever he was gone. But she then actually said to him, "I know this is none of my business, but that has actually been happening, I've seen the guy who comes here when you are gone".

My brother confronted his girlfriend on the spot, and then hired a lorry the following weekend and moved out all of his stuff. And once all their outstanding finances were sorted out, they never spoke again. That was five years ago, and to this day, my brother refuses any sort of contact with her at all.

To make a point among all this unremarkable drivel - my brother was the first lad that his ex girlfriend had sex with. And after two and a half years of this first relationship for her, she had grown tired of just being with him and (I guess) wanted to see what other knobs are like.

You can't win, if you're the partner of somebody like that. Somewhere in the back of their head, there will always be the thought that they haven't had any other experiences. No matter how great a person you are and no matter how much they love you.
>> No. 25892 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 12:22 pm
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>>25891

Why is it more often than not the bloke that ends up moving out?
>> No. 25893 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 12:35 pm
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>>25892

I think blokes are less afraid of drawing the final consequences. And I guess that also means being the first to take the step of moving out of a shared flat.

Related to that point, women often hold on to a failing relationship until the moment that somebody else comes along that they can latch on to. By the time women actually take the leap and dump their lad for somebody new, that also means that nothing the lad will do will get her to come back. It will be set in stone by that point. Because she made the decision to leave him a whole while ago, and as far as she was concerned, it was already done, only the right moment to go through with it (i.e. meeting a new bloke) hadn't presented itself.

I was that bloke a few times. The lad that they saw as the chance to leave their old relationship behind. And I had long debates with at least two lasses like that about why they didn't play it straight with their guy much sooner. And they both said they were more afraid of being alone than they were of staying in a relationship that they no longer wanted. And that's another thing where I think blokes aren't as afraid of the consequences. Blokes find it much easier to spend some time on their own.
>> No. 25894 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 12:58 pm
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>>25887
Stellar projecting there lad.
>> No. 25896 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 4:01 pm
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>>25894

I'm not sure what you think I'm projecting but claiming to forgo "meaningless sex" because you would prefer "a deeply personal and meaningful relationship" is a bit like saying you'd rather go hungry sat outside the Fat Duck than nip into Greggs for a pasty.
>> No. 25899 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 5:21 pm
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>>25896
No mate, I'm saying casual hookups do nothing for me after experiencing something better. Sex with someone you're deeply involved with is awesome and an all around good time with a lot of room for fun exploration. The fact you can't seem to grasp the concept that some people would prefer this to impersonal (and in my experience poorer quality) sex is leading me more to agree with >>25866
>> No. 25900 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 5:41 pm
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>>25893
>Related to that point, women often hold on to a failing relationship until the moment that somebody else comes along that they can latch on to

My friend has been in a relationship exactly like this for over a decade now. She's largely with him because he's her first serious boyfriend and she doesn't want to be single. She came very close to leaving him for someone else, not that he knows anything about it, a few years back but chickened out.
>> No. 25901 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 6:41 pm
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>>25899

> I'm saying casual hookups do nothing for me after experiencing something better.

Then you are weird lad, lad. If you were to say that they pale in comparison, or just aren't as satisfying then I'd consider that an acceptable answer. To say that they do nothing for you and that you'd rather have a wank than a skank leads me to think that you're either a bit odd in the head or completely in denial.

I'm not OP, btw.
>> No. 25902 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 7:38 pm
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>>25901
I'm not him, and maybe I enjoy a wank more than average, but definitely I'd choose a wank over a skank.
Shagging the Mrs is deeply enjoyable, far more so than even the rose tinted memories of my youth.
Maybe a sweaty affair with someone I'm convinced I've fallen for would do it too, but I'm really not feeling the urge.
>> No. 25903 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 7:57 pm
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>>25902
I’m right with you.
>> No. 25904 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 8:49 pm
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>>25902
Hear hear.
>> No. 25905 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 10:43 pm
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>>25902

You seem to be conflating the idea of meaningless sex with cheating. I'm not suggesting one should look for meaningless sex ex-curricular sex whilst in a committed relationship, merely that someone who is single and prefers wanking to a meaningless shag is (in my book, at least) pretty fucking odd.
>> No. 25907 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 11:05 pm
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>>25905
Sounds like YMMV. Given a straight choice, for me, wank beats skank.
Honestly, imageboard bollocks notwithstanding, that's just the way it is. I never particularly enjoyed short term sex, it generally felt somewhere between an obligation and an absurdity. With the Mrs, it's completely different. I'd trade that for a wank, probably by 25:1, and a skank by 100:1
The only reason I brought up an affair is that that (I imagine) would be a long term thing with someone I was clearly willing to risk a lot to be with & bed.
>> No. 25909 Anonymous
7th December 2017
Thursday 11:21 pm
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>>25905
Well, count me in with >>25902, >>25903 and >>25904 in disagreeing with you. Though I suppose it depends on the definition of "skank". I literally don't think I could get it up with a prostitute, I kind of need to know I'm sleeping with someone that I like and that actually likes me - if that was "meaningless" in the sense that we both knew it wouldn't turn into a relationship that's fine.
>> No. 25911 Anonymous
8th December 2017
Friday 2:15 am
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>>25909

I chose the word "skank" because it rhymed with "wank". If it helps just insert "random lass from the tinder / 'spoons" or wherever people actually meet people these days.

> I kind of need to know I'm sleeping with someone that I like and that actually likes me - if that was "meaningless" in the sense that we both knew it wouldn't turn into a relationship that's fine.

I'm just coming from a position where having sex with someone I've known for a short period, and who I might not know for much longer, is far preferable to wanking alone like an eternal teenlad but with 4K porn instead of 320x180 videos painstakingly downloaded over dialup.

Anyway, as is par for the course, we seem way off topic.

My position is that in OPs position I would have shagged my twenties away in careless abandon and only thought about settling down in my thirties. I didn't and got settled down in my twenties and regret it.

YMMV / grass is always greener / whatever / whatever. If I could have my time over again I'd do it differently. Would I be any happier? Well, it's impossible to know.
>> No. 25912 Anonymous
8th December 2017
Friday 3:14 am
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>>25856

>I genuinely love the girl

Then don't leave her because ofa psuedo-macho "sow your oats" mentality. Have the strength to realise what you can't change, the courage to change what can be changed and the wisdom to tell the difference. You aren't going to grow as a man by shagging other women, all that will happen is you'll regret leaving her for the rest of your life.

I know, please trust me. It might go to shit, but that is a bridge you cross when you come to it. If you "have the skills" you'll still have them in any eventuality. You might get lucky and become a pre-war-esque widower on a permanent purple patch if she dies in child birth.
>> No. 25913 Anonymous
8th December 2017
Friday 4:27 am
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I wish when I was young and I got the urge to wander whilst I was in a relationship that I stuck where I was.
No other lover was ever as magical as that first one, over time my relationships and hook ups since then have felt more and more like cynical transactions. It is not that the early ones were necessarily better, just things were more meaningful to me going through the process the first time round. The relationship miles stones start feeling like a process rather than a journey of discovery the more times you do them.
I'm reminded of 'the little prince' who considers the unique flower he grows to be the most beautiful thing he has ever seen. But one day he sees a whole field of roses and it robs from the specialness of that first flower when he realises it was just a 'common rose' all along. But through self-reflection he comes to realise the value to him is not in the physical properties or what anyone else see but in the emotional investment he has put in to that flower that makes it special to him.
Being curious and eating from tree of knowledge might broaden your understanding of the world but it will get you banished from paradise to wander the wilderness. Only you can answer for yourself OP if the sacrificing what you have is worth it.
Of course this arguing so far is all built on a false dichotomy, there are infinite other options, I’m of the belief there are really as many relationship models as there are combinations of people (don’t tell tumblr that though it’ll only encourage them to try name them all), these are the ones which I can think off the top of my head as a man with poor imagination. A) talk with your partner about doing something a bit more open kinky and fruity (of which there are many options you might learn some interesting things about one another) (the upshot is even if that fails you end up single which is an outcome you sort of want anyway, bit if you don’t ask you don’t get); B) cheat, I’m not going to go into the virtues of that for you but there are probably quite a lot of people who are happy doing it; C)A bit of lateral thinking, you might just be bored and the devil makes work for idle hands - take up a hobby, or some community work, have you ever climbed up the north side of an Alp? I have, didn’t help with the relationship but at least I know that now, and I crossed that off my bucket list; D) As Jean-Paul Sartre would point out at any time you have the freedom to kill yourself. You know live fast die young, don’t fear the reaper, these sorts of problems won’t bother you at all when you cease to exist.
It is up to you OP. If you are just want someone to tell you what to do personally I’d go with the ‘stick with your wife’ fortune cookie, but your options aren’t as narrow as you think.
>> No. 25915 Anonymous
8th December 2017
Friday 11:15 am
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>>25913
>talk with your partner about doing something a bit more open kinky and fruity (of which there are many options you might learn some interesting things about one another)
This. Don't just blurt out "I WANT TO FUCK OTHER GIRLS IS THAT OK". But if she's got a submissive streak, for example, next time you've got her tied to the bedposts tell her you're off to 'Spoons to pick up a skank (thanks, >>25911) and you're going to fuck in front of her, then go take a leak and see what she says afterwards. You can play it off as dirty talk if the idea upsets her but you might find she gets off on the idea and is fine with introducing someone new into your sex life.

More generally, and importantly, communicate with her that you're bored in the bedroom, because you clearly are, or you wouldn't be thinking seriously of cheating on her. If she cares about you then that's something you should both be able to work on. Listen to her boundaries and respect them, and be prepared to indulge her kinks as well, even if they're not really your thing.
>> No. 25916 Anonymous
8th December 2017
Friday 2:36 pm
25916 OP
I have to genuinely thank you lot for some excellent advice in here. I've looked at things in ways I wouldn't have considered if not for this thread and I've been mulling it all around for a few days.

For any one interested, I have decided to honestly voice my concerns. Not in a stupid way, but tactfully. I'm not going to outright say "I want to fuck other girls", but express that (like her, by the way) she is my first relationship. The only girl I've had sex with, and unfortunately now I'm a little bit more experienced I feel my sex life is quite stale, so my idea is it would be good to try new things, go on a bit of sexual self-discovery *with* her. I do feel she could put more effort in, and I am going to tell her that if she sees a future with me then its important that she appreciates that and works to change it. If she doesn't seem to appreciate that then it will be indicative of someone quite selfish, and not someone I'd be willing to ultimately settle with anyway, and I will voice that with her too but again, nicer. I'm willing to go down this route because I love her, and our relationship aside from sexually is amazing, I don't want to throw that away until I have at least tried to work out this issue with her. If she values the relationship she will want to work on it too, if not, then I guess the predicament has been decided for me.
>> No. 25917 Anonymous
8th December 2017
Friday 3:07 pm
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>>25912

> Have the strength to realise what you can't change, the courage to change what can be changed and the wisdom to tell the difference.

He's having relationship problems not alcohol problems.
>> No. 25918 Anonymous
8th December 2017
Friday 3:22 pm
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>>25916
>If she doesn't seem to appreciate that then it will be indicative of someone quite selfish, and not someone I'd be willing to ultimately settle with anyway, and I will voice that with her too but again, nicer.
1. How do you not know if she's selfish or not at this point
2. Don't say that second part it's just emotional blackmail
>> No. 25919 Anonymous
8th December 2017
Friday 5:14 pm
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>>25916
It all sounds a bit too overt if you ask me. Yes frank honesty is marvelous but, you do actually want her to stick around and do what you want.

Simply suggest new things in the bedroom that you've read up on and would enjoy. Take the initiative and remember that if she's a bit of a prude you've got to break her in slowly otherwise she can and will kick unless she's completely spineless. None of this ultimatum following a hurtful comment on her skills business, that will just end in tears. None of that 'I'm the victim here' because it's the definition of unattractive.

It's like putting it in a birds virgin arse, you start slow and patient with a pinky to get her comfortable and break that mental barrier before slowing moving more and more extreme until shes shoving cola bottles up her arse while on the phone to you...Then you find out that you've created a monster and it escalates until she leaves YOU for being too prudish.

I'm rambling here but when I read this stuff I can't help but see every mistake I've ever made playing out again.
>> No. 25920 Anonymous
8th December 2017
Friday 5:30 pm
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>>25919
>It's like putting it in a birds virgin arse, you start slow and patient with a pinky to get her comfortable and break that mental barrier before slowing moving more and more extreme until shes shoving cola bottles up her arse while on the phone to you

Rim them. Trust me, the way to get women round to anal is to use your tongue rather than your fingers. If you slobber it up good and proper it means you don't need to use any additional lube, either.
>> No. 25921 Anonymous
8th December 2017
Friday 5:43 pm
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>>25918
This. Honestly OP, not trying to be a dick or anything but you don't seem that mature emotionally. What she wants too matters as well, perhaps there's areas she thinks you could be putting more effort in. By all means talk about it, communication is good, but communicate well.
>> No. 25922 Anonymous
8th December 2017
Friday 5:54 pm
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>>25920

I feel like rimming is higher up on the scale then your garden variety anal. If someone was put off by the idea they might never kiss you again.

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