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>> No. 26793 Anonymous
8th June 2018
Friday 6:24 pm
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An incredibly attractive girl joined my team at work and for some reason picked me to flirt with.

She has been following me around, when I go for a break, when I get lunch, she always comes with me.

She's made a point of trying to sit next to me all the time and making me feel like the funniest man on planet earth by laughing at literally everything I say. She's been messaging me outside of work with inside jokes and just, in general, being a relentless flirt.

I bit the bullet and asked her what she was doing at the weekend over messages and she said that she was doing absolutely nothing, so I invited her out to which she just ignored it and moved on.

She's just messaged me again now asking me to Whatsapp her and give me her number but I'm in too much of a bad mood.

Not really sure where this is going but I stepped way out of my comfort zone and got a good kicking. It's weird how much flirting she has initiated for her to turn me down.

It's kind of ruined my Friday. Thanks for reading.
Expand all images.
>> No. 26794 Anonymous
8th June 2018
Friday 6:29 pm
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Could be that she wasn't quite ready to accept an invitation just yet, but clearly she still likes you. Easier said than done, but don't overthink it.

I am a bit confused as to how someone can just gloss over a message and just continue the conversation.
>> No. 26795 Anonymous
8th June 2018
Friday 6:32 pm
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>>26794

I mean she's literally spent the day messaging me saying how she's sad I sat somewhere else and asked me to sneak out to lunch so we didn't have to invite anybody else. If it was me making half the effort I'd be more reluctant but it's basically all been her.

It basically went:

>Random topic 1
>Invite her out for drinks here

She responds to:

>Random topic 1

And then moves on from there
>> No. 26796 Anonymous
8th June 2018
Friday 7:18 pm
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>>26794

>I am a bit confused as to how someone can just gloss over a message and just continue the conversation.

A lot of people do this, it's infuriating but quite common, especially with girls you don't know all that well, they'll just completely ignore entire questions.
>> No. 26797 Anonymous
8th June 2018
Friday 7:22 pm
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>>26796

Fair enough, I stick by my original interpretation that she's probably just not ready for an invitation like that yet.

>>26795

If you like her, OP, just keep spending time with her and try not to stress about little things like this. There are infinite reasons why someone may not reply to an invite, and it's not worth speculating about.
>> No. 26798 Anonymous
8th June 2018
Friday 7:38 pm
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I'm going to go out on a limb here and say she is interested but she's playing silly buggers because of some idea about 'the chase'. Or, she just likes knowing men are into her and not responding to it to give her ego a thrill, especially when she's new in a workplace and hasn't got many mates yet.

I'd suggest carrying on talking to her, but also making it known that you've got a Tinder date. Or, just be civil but tell yourself you'll get over some girl's fickle flight of fancy very fast if you focus on other...fings. Plenty more fish in the sea and all that. Handled properly, you'll be over this by this time next week. Godpseed.
>> No. 26800 Anonymous
9th June 2018
Saturday 1:40 am
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>>26798
Yeah I guess that's not bad advice.

>Godpseed
More like god hope he seeds her amirite.
>> No. 26801 Anonymous
9th June 2018
Saturday 8:06 am
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>>26793

She sounds like a cocktease, she may not actually be interested in you at all. She mostly just wants your attention to feed her ego. The less interested you are, the more keen she'll be, and the more interested you are the more indifferent she will be. If she is really as attractive as you say, and young enough to never have got burnt, then this is a power game she is used to playing. That said nothing ventured nothing gained, if you want to pursue this don't let me talk you out of it, but proceed with caution at the risk that she is just using you.
>> No. 26802 Anonymous
9th June 2018
Saturday 8:21 am
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Thanks lads, agreed with everything.

I don't intend on pursuing it and am only being cordial to avoid looking bitter.

I made the mistake of thinking that because she was ignoring the legions of other people desperately trying to get her attention and still pining over to me all the time it might be different.

I'm happy enough with life to move on.
>> No. 26803 Anonymous
9th June 2018
Saturday 9:03 am
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>She's just messaged me again now asking me to Whatsapp her and give me her number but I'm in too much of a bad mood.

Why is everyone ignoring this part? She's clearly still ripe for the dicking.

If you go and sulk and ignore her because she ignored your invitation you're never going to get far. She was probably a bit flustered over it herself.

In my workplace we sneak onto people's computer if they leave themselves logged on, and send horribly lewd messages about sexual acts to the person we reckon they fancy/fancies them. Think yourself lucky.
>> No. 26808 Anonymous
9th June 2018
Saturday 12:00 pm
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>>26803
>Why is everyone ignoring this part?

I wasn't and I don't think anyone else was it just strikes me as behaviour to keep leading him on when she thinks he is losing interest.
>> No. 26809 Anonymous
9th June 2018
Saturday 2:38 pm
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>>26808

He'd probably be wise to keep it that way to be fair. The chase is invariably better than the catch.

If the lad is working with her then the very fucking last thing he wants is to get involved with her in any serious capacity, but there's nothing more fun that having that bird you share a wire-snapping level of tension with and both know you're going to end up falling in bed if the circumstances present themselves.
>> No. 26810 Anonymous
9th June 2018
Saturday 4:21 pm
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>>26802


The beauty of this approach too, is that once she sees you stop showing interest, if she does fancy you she'll only want to shag you more. And if she doesn't fancy you she'll just move on to an easier source of attention.
>> No. 26821 Anonymous
11th June 2018
Monday 8:11 pm
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Not that any of you care, but you were right.

I played it slightly cooler today and she's been messaging me all day and AGAIN came to lunch.

She also came up to me to tell me how lovely and blue my eyes were. I just shrugged it off.

Some people really do thrive off of the attention.
>> No. 26826 Anonymous
11th June 2018
Monday 11:12 pm
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>>26821
We do care mate, we enjoy the vindication.
>> No. 26832 Anonymous
12th June 2018
Tuesday 12:35 am
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>>26821

Jesus Christ, lad. Arrange a works night out and mention it to her in passing, then nail her. You have a legitimate excuse to make awkward conversation with each oter until one of you leaves or dies after that, like God intended.
>> No. 26851 Anonymous
13th June 2018
Wednesday 11:24 pm
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>>26821 I care.
>> No. 26852 Anonymous
14th June 2018
Thursday 9:34 pm
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>>26851

Tupac cares, if don't nobody else care.
>> No. 26854 Anonymous
16th June 2018
Saturday 12:19 pm
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After your update in >>26821 I've been reminded that you work together, and that >>26809 is actually now the best advice. Don't shit where you eat etc. etc., but keep her dangling as much as she's trying to keep your dangle dingling and enjoy an absolutely outrageous few months of workplace flirtation. Then if you ever hand in your notice, finally give her the link and shag her silly. Sorted.

And obviously we care, mate. How else do we get to relive our misspent days of shagaluf youngladding about than vicariously through your posts? It's probably one of the more innocent threads /emo has ever had, quite sweet really.
>> No. 26855 Anonymous
16th June 2018
Saturday 6:45 pm
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Flattered by your kind posts lads, the saga continues.

Her level of flirting has stepped up considerably to the point where she keeps asking me to touch her hands, making jokes about how all these other lads who fancy her are always around and off handly said 'oh are you jealous?' or whatever.

She still keeps coming to lunch, but not before making me wait whilst she reapplies some make up, and even suggested going for drinks one day after work. She keeps Whatsapping me through the nights and weekends too.

She also keeps getting really close to me in the lift and leaning against the wall then ruffling her hair and has made jokes about how people probably think we are together because one time she got really close and the doors opened and a colleague saw and jumped in another lift.

Anyway, she commented again on my eyes by joking how somebody probably fancied me in the team 'because of my beautiful blue eyes'. I'm never sure how to respond to those compliments so I just laughed it off.

Anyway I was at the pub and some mates brought her up on Facebook because I don't use it and it looks like she may in fact have a boyfriend that she has conveniently NEVER mentioned in all of the time we spend chatting.

I'm not a cunt so I think that's an end to it. Sorry for the disappointing end lads.
>> No. 26856 Anonymous
16th June 2018
Saturday 7:03 pm
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>>26855
Oh and she also started asking me about how I like to have sex and the noises she makes when she does. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a tad uncomfortable though considering we were sat in the middle of work.

It's almost like the racist speaking to you on the bus, you want them to stop doing it so everybody stops looking over at you but they seem completely oblivious to how awkward they're making you feel.
>> No. 26857 Anonymous
16th June 2018
Saturday 7:19 pm
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>>26855

Oh Christ lad. Good luck.

I'm not sure how you get rid of her at this point, especially because her angle could still be pure attention, or revenge sex against her boyfriend, or somewhere in between.

I'd suggest just moving to a different city, or maybe telling her you're gay.
>> No. 26860 Anonymous
16th June 2018
Saturday 9:31 pm
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>>26857
> or maybe telling her you're gay

This. Tell her a sob story about how your boyfriend's hung like a donkey and keeps going on about wanting to find out if women's arses feel as good as mens do.

If she jumps at the chance of having her arse ripped in twain by a monster cock from hell then just marry her and get it over with. Enjoy your new life in fetish clubs watching her getting fisted by tubby bankers from Leamington Spa and pissed on by Russian hookers with thousand cock stares. By that point it'd obviously be your manifest destiny. Best to just bite the bullet. Or the pillow.
>> No. 26867 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 12:04 pm
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>>26855

You just have to learn how to play her lad.

I made a post a while back about how we have a similar young lass in my lab- She's the only "hot" girl so she likes to think she can flutter the eyelids and make cure little giggles to manipulate all the men.

What I have learned to do is feign indifference at the precise moments she's trying to work it, and turn up the flirtatious banter at the points she isn't quite expecting. It's all a game to her, after all, and what really flusters her is when somebody starts playing back. It's become my favourite time waster over the years many makes work far more appealing of a place to be.

It is important to note that although this nets me some grade A wank bank material, I wouldn't shag her if you paid me. You don't cross that line, you appreciate what you have, because the can of worms you'd be opening is simply not worth it.
>> No. 26873 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 1:04 pm
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>>26867

I agree wholeheartedly, apart from the bit that you (and everyone else on the planet) says about never shagging a co-worker. To me that is part of the fun, it's fun to have a shag buddy at work, and usually it doesn't actually end in the career ending drama most people say it does, and even when there is drama its nothing I haven't been able to handle/secretly enjoy the excitement.

I do work in a fairly fuck-friendly industry so maybe it's a disaster in other careers, but I can't say that it seems to apply in mine.

Still, your playing of your colleague is absolutely spot on.
>> No. 26877 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 3:10 pm
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>>26873

It's not really about the drama. It's more that after you actually do fuck, and the inevitably mediocre performance this kind of cock-tease tart puts in, all of the previous tension evaporates. You might have got your dick wet, but soon after that you'll find yourself yearning for the days you'd just endlessly tease each other instead. In my experience, at least.
>> No. 26879 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 3:15 pm
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>>26877

Ah yeah, I get what you mean. I agree with that, too.
>> No. 26884 Anonymous
19th June 2018
Tuesday 7:13 pm
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Ah fuck, work drinks this week.

She won't go if I don't apparently, but she wants me to ditch my car and get drunk.

Apparently I should ask somebody to stay at theres or stay at hers, but if I stay at hers 'won't people think something's going on?'

Here we go.

On a side note I'm mildly worried that my cataloguing of this will somehow come to her attention and I'll look a twat. Do fit girls read britfa.gs?
>> No. 26885 Anonymous
19th June 2018
Tuesday 7:16 pm
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>>26884
There are no girls on the internet, lad.
>> No. 26886 Anonymous
19th June 2018
Tuesday 7:46 pm
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>>26885
There's at least one lass who posts here and she doesn't try to draw attention to herself. Much better than the fat lasses who posted on Britchan and when we had a few years back on here a few of them who tried to memeforce referring to themselves as "ladylads" even though "lassmate" is the far more logical wording.
>> No. 26887 Anonymous
19th June 2018
Tuesday 7:47 pm
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>>26884
>Do fit girls read britfa.gs?
You're confusing us with britsla.gs m8
>> No. 26888 Anonymous
20th June 2018
Wednesday 3:18 am
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>>26884
Do not, I repeat, do not ditch your car.

Why does no one seem to have enquired as to the unknown mental and physical state of her probable-boyfriend? Do you really think you can take some crazy roid-raged lad called Darren who does MMA on the weekends and used to, I don't know, drown kittens for his dad for pocket money? You're the one on britfa, mate. You know it can't end well for you.
>> No. 27233 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 5:18 pm
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Lads, the saga picked up.

She upped the flirting, spent a day talking about the thong she was wearing rubbing on her vagina and even invited me to drinks.

She makes over the line jokes with me all the time and gives me hugs, messages me through the weekend and has been for a drink after work twice with me.

The thing is whenever i try to up it a tiny bit, she seems to beat it down, however she is asking where work plan to relocate me to and is sending me jobs she could do in the area.

Can anybody explain this shit? She is like casually metnioning relocating her whole life depending on where I go next yet she won't give me a sneaky kiss in the lifts despite her initiating everything, including the incredibly detailed description of her vagina day by day, sex talk and even inviting me for a drink, twice.

I am at a loss
>> No. 27234 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 5:34 pm
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>>27233

When you say yes to a drink invitation, what happens?
>> No. 27235 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 6:38 pm
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>>27233
Nobody gives a "sneaky kiss" in the lifts.
>> No. 27236 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 6:50 pm
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>>27233

Either A) she enjoys the attention you give her, it might even turn her on, but she has no intention of shagging you. B) she expects you to go for it and you're not being 'direct' enough for her or C) she is following some weird shady woman rule or plan to wait for 'the perfect time' or some preordained amount of flirting before she rides you.

I'm afraid I can't help you figure out which one it is, but it's usually A.

Like >>27234 is alluding to, if she's unwilling to spend time with you alone at your request (ie an actual date) then she's not going to fuck you.
>> No. 27237 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 6:58 pm
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>>27234

We have been out twice just briefly after work.

The first time she seemed a little offended because I said I couldn't do the day she was suggesting, but did suggest the week after. She said it was weather dependent and criticised my lack of enthusiasm.

We went anyway, had one beer (because I'm driving), she had a wine and we chatted, flirted a little and joked our injokes and she left.

The second time she had two drinks, got a tiny, tiny, bit drunk, I had one, we chatted, flirted some more, talked about sex, talked about me moving with work, talked about her getting a job near me, she just laughed at my jokes liek she always does.

Walked me to my car, give me a hug and went home. She never leaves herself open for a kiss or anything though (i.e. head down when hugging etc), but there is minimal touching (i.e. arm grab or whatever), so I really don't know.

>>27235
Fuck - there goes the romantic dream.
>> No. 27238 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 7:00 pm
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She's a prick teasing bastard.
>> No. 27239 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 7:01 pm
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>>27236

Thanks anon, starting to unfortunately get that feeling, but she does joke about it all the time.

I.e. the other day she asked what my sex face looks like and I said I wasn't going to show her and she replied 'you may as well I'm going to see it eventually.'

We have a whole office of guys desperate for her attention, yet she stubbornly refuses to hang out or even flirt with anybody but me, so I really don't know. She could easly be suckering up thea ttention of about four other guys, but she will only exclusively come out to lunch with me, even when I'm not around she will just tell me how they all tried inviting her but she said no.

It's very odd.
>> No. 27240 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 7:02 pm
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>>27239
Take her for an actual date, not a drink.
>> No. 27241 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 7:12 pm
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>>27239

Ask her on a date. A proper one, not an after work drink, a proper 'let's go out' date. she might just be waiting for you to be 'serious' about the whole thing, or she just likes have a work buddy to make eyes at her. You'll only know if you treat her like any other woman you're trying to shag, i.e a real date.
>> No. 27242 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 8:49 pm
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>>27240
>>27241

Thanks lads, will do. I'm starting to have a sneaky suspicion I might be a back up for her whilst she sees somebody else, or is firming me up before she makes a jump or something.

She talks as if she's Single, but I didn't reply to her Whatsapp earlier today and she's just sent me a picture saying 'I've curled my hair because I'm going out!' with one of those cute emojis -I wonder what her game is.
>> No. 27243 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 10:24 pm
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If she was doing this with everyone I'd say she was just one of "those" girls but if she has latched onto you specifically it's possible she might be in a toxic relationship of some kind and has identified you (maybe even subconsciously) as being the kind, caring, rescuer type. Like maybe the sort of guy who would stress about the mixed-signals she's sending you and ask for help on an anonymous imageboard instead of seeing it as just an unrelated series of near-chances at getting your end away.

If her self-esteem has been crushed she might feel the need to use overtly sexual behaviour to grab your attention because she has been convinced she doesn't "deserve" the basic human decency of help derived in another way. Her blowing hot and cold could be because she feels safe with you only to get her legs kicked out from under her by an angry text or even because she still loves this other guy just as she's ready to take the plunge. If he's older, and perhaps in a relationship already, it could explain why she's so vague about whether or not she's actually available or not even in a more general sense.

In my experience actual teases are flighty, they don't focus on just the one guy specifically for more than a few hours at a time (at a push).
>> No. 27244 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 10:34 pm
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>>27242

>I'm starting to have a sneaky suspicion I might be a back up for her whilst she sees somebody else, or is firming me up before she makes a jump or something.


I hadn't even considered that, as I read your posts I just assumed you'd know if she was seeing someone, but now that you've said it, I'm pretty sure you're right. I've seen this happen a couple of times to me, one was in a shite marriage and it was all very understandable that she wanted someone who evidently she saw as the total opposite of her angry stressy husband, and the other was just obviously looking to find a replacement boyfriend before she let go of the one she was fed up with. The former worked out better than the latter, surprisingly.

Anyway, get her into a situation where you can both be a bit more open (read: drunk) with each other and I think the answer to 'what the fuck is her game' will become clear no matter what it is.

I'm praying to the god of wet dicks for you anyway mate.
>> No. 27245 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 10:47 pm
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>>27239
>I.e. the other day she asked what my sex face looks like and I said I wasn't going to show her and she replied 'you may as well I'm going to see it eventually.'

I've never had a woman flirt with me so brazenly, so I just have to say if this ever happened to me my desk would be immediately catapulted across the room. To be honest I dunno how you are managing to keep your cool OP.
>> No. 27246 Anonymous
28th July 2018
Saturday 10:50 pm
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>>27245

>To be honest I dunno how you are managing to keep your cool OP.

I have to concur, he sounds like he's fairly smooth. I'm imagining OP as some sort of office cubicle James Bond.
>> No. 27261 Anonymous
3rd August 2018
Friday 11:05 pm
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Thank you for all your excellent input lads, things have progressed well since i took some advice from here , but if I told you all how the next bits unfolded it'd probably sound like I'm making it up.
>> No. 27262 Anonymous
3rd August 2018
Friday 11:21 pm
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>>27261
Is that preferable to leaving us hanging?
>> No. 27263 Anonymous
3rd August 2018
Friday 11:21 pm
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>>27261

Oh come on lad, it's friday, treat us to some juicy gossip.

Did she suck you off under your desk?
>> No. 27264 Anonymous
3rd August 2018
Friday 11:26 pm
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>>27261
Tell us or you will forever be decried as an utter bastard. You owe us m8.

We just want to know it's gone well for you lad.
>> No. 27265 Anonymous
3rd August 2018
Friday 11:39 pm
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>>27261
Oh she absolutely noshed you off in the stationery cupboard didn't she

Back of the net
>> No. 27284 Anonymous
18th August 2018
Saturday 9:43 am
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Sorry for the delay in the updates lad, I kept meaning to come home one day and give you all an update but you know how it is, get home after a long day of work and collapse.

I'm a little hazy on the exact timeline, but one day (probably the day I posted that) she started asking me if i had a big dick, I asked why she asked and she said because she could see I had a substantial bulge in my pants. It was quite a weird conversation and led to us talking about how well I'd fit inside her.

A few days pass and she tells me that she hasn't kissed me because she didn't want to cross a line you can't go back on at work, but would like to.

As things progress and the mutual attraction is made clear she tells me about how she likes me and she's wanted to kiss me for months.

Some friends visited her for a night out and she told her best friends about me and how I'm really good looking, the funniest person she's ever known and super intelligent. I have to say, in all the smuggest feelings I've felt in life, the smugness radiating from a hot girl telling her friends about me is quite a nice one.

So time has passed, she says a few more things about how she's sorry she was hesitant but she's not normally like that until it came to me and she's invited me to stay at hers next week.

That's it really, whether I actually go is another story but turns out she was into me all along but she just felt I wasn't reciprocating strongly enough.
>> No. 27285 Anonymous
18th August 2018
Saturday 9:47 am
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>>27284
In short: nothing has happened yet but something might happen in the future.
>> No. 27286 Anonymous
18th August 2018
Saturday 9:55 am
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>>27284
That's fucking weird. Your first post was about how you invited her out and she turned you down. And she's claiming you were the one giving out mixed signals?
>> No. 27287 Anonymous
18th August 2018
Saturday 9:55 am
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>>27285
Sorry if you feel let down anon.

I thought, personally, it was quite a substantial output. We'e been on dates, admitted feelings, done lots of kissing and she's admitted she is into me via commenting on me having a supposedly big dick (that's the part I worried sounded made up).

And now I have the opportunity to bang when she's back off holiday. Thought it was better than nothing.
>> No. 27288 Anonymous
18th August 2018
Saturday 9:56 am
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>>27286

I raised it and she said it was a genuine mistake if I did ask or wasn't very clear because she would have jumped the chance.

She never said I give mixed signals, just that she was doing a lot of the pushy work and I was only reciprocating weakly and not initiating |(Largely because I was intimidated by her appearance)
>> No. 27289 Anonymous
18th August 2018
Saturday 10:01 am
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>>27288
Well then I guess it's all been a hil-AR-ious misunderstanding. You can tell your grandchildren about it.
>> No. 27290 Anonymous
18th August 2018
Saturday 10:09 am
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>>27289
Gonna be honest, this one has gone over my head.
>> No. 27296 Anonymous
24th August 2018
Friday 10:32 pm
27296 spacer
I fucked her.
>> No. 27301 Anonymous
24th August 2018
Friday 11:02 pm
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>>27296

Well done fella, good fuck? Was she pleased with your cum face and dick size?
>> No. 27302 Anonymous
25th August 2018
Saturday 12:02 am
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>>27296

Well done lad.

I look forward to the thread in couple of years time where you agonise over whether you'll have to leave your job when you dump her.
>> No. 27303 Anonymous
25th August 2018
Saturday 12:17 am
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>>27296
We need the sordid details.
>> No. 27306 Anonymous
25th August 2018
Saturday 8:33 am
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>>27296
GREAT SUCCESS

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