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whiteline
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>> No. 56437 Samefag
4th September 2016
Sunday 8:28 am
56437 spacer
Jim's the name.

Filling my washing machine with a hot beefy load's the game.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/married-mp-keith-vaz-tells-8763805.amp

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/keith-vaz-hid-real-identity-8763804.amp
28 posts and 4 images omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 56467 Moralfag
5th September 2016
Monday 5:40 pm
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>>56462

Since every phone on the planet got a QWERTY keyboard typing like that has been unacceptable.
>> No. 56488 Anonymous
10th September 2016
Saturday 8:32 pm
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1473535678489.jpg
564885648856488

>> No. 57666 R4GE
11th February 2017
Saturday 8:32 pm
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>John Bercow stopped the Commons being warned about police inquiries into Keith Vaz after accepting tens of thousands of pounds from the MP’s associates.

>When the Conservative MP Andrew Bridgen privately alerted the Speaker in September 2015 about allegations being made to police, Mr Bercow declined to ask Mr Vaz to quit as chairman of the influential home affairs select committee. The Speaker also stopped Mr Bridgen from telling the Commons details about the police looking into an alleged abuse of public office by Mr Vaz.

>The Speaker is traditionally returned unopposed at general elections but Jimmy Saville and some independents stood against Mr Bercow in his Buckingham seat in 2010. Ukip did so again in 2015. The Times has now discovered that most of the gifts accepted by Mr Bercow to fund his re-election campaigns came from associates of Mr Vaz.

>Of £58,000 raised for Mr Bercow’s campaigns, £41,000 came from donors who would have been familiar with Mr Vaz.

>Mr Bercow’s friendship with Mr Vaz has been looking increasingly unwise. On the day after a Sunday newspaper revealed details of Mr Vaz’s sex party, Mr Bercow called on him in the Commons to speak. The Speaker squeezed Mr Vaz’s wrist and gave him a pat on the back. Police cleared Mr Vaz of criminality over the orgy.

http://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/bercow-blocked-vaz-revelations-after-accepting-poll-donations-gbs8ndr65

The plot thickens.
>> No. 57761 Crabkiller
22nd February 2017
Wednesday 12:01 am
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bercowlips.png
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>>56437
WAYHEY
>> No. 57762 R4GE
22nd February 2017
Wednesday 12:32 am
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>>57666
>Of £58,000 raised for Mr Bercow’s campaigns, £41,000 came from donors who would have been familiar with Mr Vaz.
Well fuck me. Someone who wasn't familiar with Keith Vaz somehow ended up donating 17 grand to re-elect the Speaker. Like, how does that even happen?

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>> No. 57669 Anonymous
12th February 2017
Sunday 10:34 am
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Lads, I've been doing some serious thinking.

Why do we wee? Because your body has taken in more water than it needs. Ergo, it stands to reason that if you can limit your water intake you'll never need to wee ever again.
21 posts and 2 images omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 57752 Crabkiller
21st February 2017
Tuesday 6:14 pm
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>>57734

Theres nowhere good for a quick dinner in wakey except maybe the conservatory but even they're not that great.
>> No. 57753 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 6:18 pm
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>>57752
I've eaten in the cathedral cafe. Cheap and cheerful, if you don't mind being surrounded by pensioners.

I've been meaning to try that brazuca, too.
>> No. 57754 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 6:27 pm
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>>57752

You don't come to wakey for a posh lunch, you get on a bus up to leeds for that. You come to wakey to get hammered and throw your kebab at a taxi on argos corner.

smokehouse is pretty good if you don't mind paying a few bob
>> No. 57757 Crabkiller
21st February 2017
Tuesday 10:54 pm
57757 spacer
How many 20p coins can fit in a fanny?
>> No. 57758 Moralfag
21st February 2017
Tuesday 11:20 pm
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>>57757

About 3 billion.

whiteline
>> No. 57736 Crabkiller
19th February 2017
Sunday 11:03 pm
57736 spacer
When you hear it ...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2SrK-1L7va0
Expand all images.
>> No. 57740 Crabkiller
20th February 2017
Monday 1:38 pm
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It's from 2008 lad.
>> No. 57743 Anonymous
20th February 2017
Monday 9:22 pm
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>>57740
britfags is from 2008.
>> No. 57745 Billbob
20th February 2017
Monday 9:29 pm
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>>57743
so's your mum m8

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>> No. 57611 Anonymous
1st February 2017
Wednesday 7:18 am
57611 spacer
MADDIE MUM'S BID TO WIN BGT

Kate McCann’s Missing People Choir brings Britain’s Got Talent judges to tears with heartbreaking secret audition.

An audience member in London said: “Images of some of the missing people they were linked to also flashed up on the screen which had everyone in tears.


https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/2753198/kate-mccanns-missing-people-choir-brings-britains-got-talent-judges-to-tears-with-heartbreaking-secret-audition/

The performance is expected to be shown on ITV in May, marking exactly ten years since Madeleine went missing from Praia Da Luz in Portugal.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/tv/tv-news/kate-mccanns-missing-people-choir-9733959

The Missing People’s Choir is made up of families searching for lost loved ones and includes Peter Lawrence, father of Claudia Lawrence, who disappeared in York in 2009.

The choir reportedly reduced onlookers to tears during the BGT auditions with their tear-jerking song I Miss You, written by Peter Boxell, whose son Lee went missing from Sutton, south London, in 1988.
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.
6 posts and 1 image omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 57620 R4GE
2nd February 2017
Thursday 6:56 pm
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>>57618
If they lost the libel does that a tacit admission by the Portuguese courts that they think the McCann's killed her by giving her too many sedatives whilst they went off to get rat arsed?
>> No. 57621 Searchfag
3rd February 2017
Friday 4:34 am
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>>57620

Basically, yes.
>> No. 57663 YubYub
9th February 2017
Thursday 7:15 am
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>Kate and Gerry McCann 'not formally in the clear' over daughter Madeleine's disappearance

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/kate-gerry-mccann-not-totally-9782804
>> No. 57664 Are Moaty
9th February 2017
Thursday 5:01 pm
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CAN'T WAIT TO HEAR ALL OF THEIR HIT SONGS. THEIR ALBUM INCLUDES:

"STILL NOT HERE" (2001)

"STILL NOT HERE" (2002)

"STILL NOT HERE" (2003)

"STILL NOT HERE" (2004)

"STILL NOT HERE" (2005)

"STILL NOT HERE" (2006)

"B*TCH STILL AIN'T HERE" FEAT. NICKI MINAJ (2017)
>> No. 57733 Billbob
18th February 2017
Saturday 9:09 am
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>> No. 57694 Anonymous
13th February 2017
Monday 6:54 am
57694 spacer
Greetings to all the wonderful users here. Also all the rest of you commie lefty bitches.

What do you make of this?

http://thedaily.online
5 posts omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 57714 Anonymous
15th February 2017
Wednesday 8:54 pm
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>>57704
It's awful in about 24 different ways.

You can quote me on that.
>> No. 57715 Anonymous
15th February 2017
Wednesday 10:58 pm
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>>57709

I WISH I CRIED FAGS, I'D SAVE A FORTUNE.

I'M SO ALONE.
>> No. 57724 Crabkiller
17th February 2017
Friday 2:15 am
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>>57714
Tell me the 24 ways.

This should be entertaining.
>> No. 57728 Anonymous
17th February 2017
Friday 7:33 pm
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>>57724

I wouldn't give you the pleasure.
>> No. 57729 Samefag
17th February 2017
Friday 11:17 pm
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>>57728

I wouldn't give you pleasure either, m7

whiteline
>> No. 57716 Ambulancelad
16th February 2017
Thursday 4:26 am
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2sMWaH3vTEs
5 posts and 1 image omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 57722 Anonymous
16th February 2017
Thursday 11:31 pm
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>>57721
She said that having a baby wrecked her fanny and arsehole.
>> No. 57723 Anonymous
16th February 2017
Thursday 11:45 pm
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>>57721

I've poked worse.

Middle-aged women with baldy clackers just look a bit creepy. When things start to go saggy, it's all a bit "last turkey in the shop". At least leave a landing strip or something, salvage a bit of dignity.
>> No. 57725 Are Moaty
17th February 2017
Friday 11:34 am
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Let's go to the phones - call in and tell us what you think about this woman's vulva.
>> No. 57726 Paedofag
17th February 2017
Friday 12:38 pm
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>>57725
A HAIRY TWAT. A HUNGRY DEVOURING TWAT.
>> No. 57727 Anonymous
17th February 2017
Friday 3:01 pm
57727 spacer
>>57725

roaring purple vagina

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>> No. 57676 Are Moaty
12th February 2017
Sunday 12:30 pm
57676 spacer
Evil Karen Matthews has scalding peas thrown at her in chip shop attack

Hated Matthews was attacked days after telling how she feared for her life after a new drama about her vile crimes began on TV.

The 41-year-old gorges on £4.50 fish suppers from her local takeaway three times a week. An angry woman followed her outside and dumped the peas over her head. As they dripped on to her duffel coat the woman ranted: “You evil bitch. I’m a mother too.”

Matthews was freed from jail after serving half of an eight-year sentence. She now lives in a flat in the Home Counties, 200 miles from Dewsbury, West Yorks, where she kidnapped nine-year-old Shannon. She claims £20,000 a year in benefits and has been allowed to change her name as it appears on the Electoral Roll to keep vigilantes at bay.


http://www.dailystar.co.uk/news/latest-news/587409/Karen-Matthews-scalding-peas-chip-shop-attack-The-Moorside

Too fucking right. £20,000 of taxpayer's money so she can gorge on fish suppers three times a week. If I owned that chippy I'd forego the £13.50 of weekly sales revenue and ban her.
22 posts and 1 image omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 57708 Billbob
15th February 2017
Wednesday 4:56 pm
57708 spacer
>>57707

It would be about, tops, £100 lower than that.

She probably gets enhanced PIP, as she is agoraphobic about leaving the house for fear of attack plus [insert mental illness here]. Child benefit isn't that much in the grand scheme of things.
>> No. 57710 R4GE
15th February 2017
Wednesday 5:03 pm
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>>57707
>A private rent in that area would be, at most, £400 per month and council house rent is far lower than that

Jesus Christ.
>> No. 57711 Paedofag
15th February 2017
Wednesday 5:41 pm
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Those chips are giving me pure cravings. Peas look a bit crap, mind.
>> No. 57712 YubYub
15th February 2017
Wednesday 6:03 pm
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>>57708
>agoraphobic

I don't think she's scared of fighting.

Despite having a secret identity the tabloids keep following her, here's a Daily Star exclusive of her "splashing the cash" in poundland, and they've uncovered she works in a charity shop so she can't be agoraphobic.

>>57710
Maybe £450pcm tops. Incidentally I Bought my bedframe from a delightful shop not too far away from the moorside estate called cheap'r'us. I'm pretty sure all the staff in the back assembling the furniture were either illegal immigrants or modern day slaves.
>> No. 57713 Moralfag
15th February 2017
Wednesday 6:10 pm
57713 spacer
>>57712
I'm looking for somewhere in essex/hertfordshire (near work) and it's £400/month absolute minimum, for a room living with some polish lads.


I don't earn enough for this shit. Well, I do, but not to live and save.

whiteline
>> No. 57665 YubYub
11th February 2017
Saturday 6:08 pm
57665 spacer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3tirSGoT6c

Oldie but still good.
Expand all images.
>> No. 57667 Moralfag
11th February 2017
Saturday 9:38 pm
57667 spacer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XT-PhQ6GYmA
>> No. 57668 Auntiefucker
11th February 2017
Saturday 10:13 pm
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>>57665

Let me at em muammwuarrallashimshim billmisahh

whiteline
>> No. 57655 R4GE
8th February 2017
Wednesday 9:00 pm
57655 spacer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0k23ro8uDtk?start=71

Phwoar. They don't make kids TV like this anymore.
2 posts omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 57658 Auntiefucker
8th February 2017
Wednesday 10:23 pm
57658 spacer
>>57656
Because we didn't need two threads with this video.

Although I've forgotten how to embed YouTube videos starting at a certain time already.
>> No. 57659 Auntiefucker
8th February 2017
Wednesday 10:37 pm
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>>57657
I think, if I remember correctly, after the ginger one left the coin went to a cousin who lived on a houseboat and owned a parrot.
>> No. 57660 Moralfag
8th February 2017
Wednesday 10:40 pm
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Harmony would still get it.
>> No. 57661 Samefag
8th February 2017
Wednesday 10:47 pm
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>>57658
>Although I've forgotten how to embed YouTube videos starting at a certain time already.

Are you alright, lad? Do you want us to call someone?
>> No. 57662 Anonymous
9th February 2017
Thursday 1:34 am
57662 spacer
>>57658
[yt]0k23ro8uDtk?start=71[ /yt]

Remove the space, test it in >>/test/

whiteline
>> No. 57622 Auntiefucker
5th February 2017
Sunday 10:47 pm
57622 spacer
I want to write a shitpost haiku.

YouTube suggestions
Unreliable judgements
Fuck Gordon Ramsey
23 posts omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 57646 Moralfag
7th February 2017
Tuesday 12:04 pm
57646 spacer
>>57645
Don't get so het up
it's called enjambment, okay?
there aren't any rules
>> No. 57649 YubYub
7th February 2017
Tuesday 4:43 pm
57649 spacer
>>57646
ENJAMBMENT, U WOT?
FILTHY GAIJIN ENGLISH MUCK
WE'LL HAVE NONE OF THAT
>> No. 57650 Billbob
7th February 2017
Tuesday 6:59 pm
57650 spacer
>>57646

5, 7, 5, m8
Try and get around that one
Since you're an 'ard cunt
>> No. 57653 Searchfag
8th February 2017
Wednesday 2:17 pm
57653 spacer
>>57649
Did you forget that
you're writing in English, mate?
English is Gaijin
>> No. 57654 Anonymous
8th February 2017
Wednesday 3:01 pm
57654 spacer
>>57653
We are British m8
Fuck off back where you came from
Filthy foreign scum

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>> No. 57651 YubYub
8th February 2017
Wednesday 1:31 pm
57651 spacer
CYCLING: NOT EVEN ONCE.
Expand all images.
>> No. 57652 Crabkiller
8th February 2017
Wednesday 1:34 pm
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>> No. 57647 Paedofag
7th February 2017
Tuesday 12:35 pm
57647 spacer
KERNEL SANDERS HAS LET HIMSELF GO
Expand all images.
>> No. 57648 Anonymous
7th February 2017
Tuesday 2:12 pm
57648 spacer
its finger lickin good, something about chicken, er forget it

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>> No. 57147 Moralfag
15th November 2016
Tuesday 6:02 pm
57147 spacer
>Comedian Rory McGrath appeared in court today accused of stalking a married woman for 14 months.

>The 60-year-old star is alleged to have harassed the victim despite complaints from the woman, her husband and the police, a court heard.

>His alleged stalking is said to include sending the woman electronic messages and approaching her in the street. He is also said to have approached the woman and her husband in public and sent letters to the victim's husband, it was said.

>Prosecutor Anthea Harris said: 'It is a stalking offence which continued over a 14-month period, there are a number of aggravating features, these are features which are deliberate and show evidence of pre-planning.' She added: 'The tenure (of the allegations) is striking and distasteful.'

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3938326/Comedian-Rory-McGrath-appears-court-accused-stalking-married-woman-14-months.html

It's been a while since we've had a celebrity nutter. Think jlc was the last.
37 posts and 2 images omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 57608 YubYub
29th January 2017
Sunday 8:10 am
57608 spacer
>>57605
Asian babes? Last time I saw chubby in something he was moaning about muzzas.
>> No. 57609 Paedofag
29th January 2017
Sunday 2:06 pm
57609 spacer
>>57608
That's the joke.
>> No. 57610 R4GE
29th January 2017
Sunday 11:14 pm
57610 spacer
>> a Xmas gift for his (then) wife. He said just choose a stocking filler, so I got her a wooden leg.
>> No. 57616 Billbob
1st February 2017
Wednesday 8:17 pm
57616 spacer
If we're still on about tenuous links to famous people then my dad has been glared at by both Eric Pollard from emmerdale and peter Levy off look north.
>> No. 57617 Anonymous
1st February 2017
Wednesday 10:50 pm
57617 spacer
>>57616Well done, I have no idea who you're on about.

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>> No. 57596 Crabkiller
28th January 2017
Saturday 9:03 pm
57596 SITH LORD LIVES MATTER
DARTH VADER IN HIS WANK MACHINE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOhUQCXMHdU
1 post omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 57598 Ambulancelad
28th January 2017
Saturday 9:27 pm
57598 spacer
>>57597
I could never get into the third series of League of Gentlemen, even though the first two are one of my favourite comedies and I used to watch them (plus the Live at Drury Lane show) all the time on VHS.

For me it's like Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull or any Shrek film after the second one, i.e. I pretend it doesn't exist.
>> No. 57599 R4GE
28th January 2017
Saturday 9:48 pm
57599 spacer
>>57598

>I COULD NEVER GET INTO THE THIRD SERIES OF LEAGUE OF GENTLEMEN

not even the bit where ross shags pauline?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QBuD9LLAOMI
>> No. 57602 Auntiefucker
28th January 2017
Saturday 10:51 pm
57602 spacer
>>57598
I find them easier to watch because they dropped the laugh track.
>> No. 57606 Anonymous
29th January 2017
Sunday 12:24 am
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>>57602

"Easier" is a very subjective term when it comes to watching The League of Gentlemen.
>> No. 57607 Moralfag
29th January 2017
Sunday 1:36 am
57607 spacer
>>57599

i tried wanking to the vid but i had to keep pressing rewind after every 2 shaft pumps

gave up

whiteline
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