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>> No. 9544 Anonymous
26th June 2013
Wednesday 10:29 pm
9544 Recipes only, no comments. Stickied

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>> No. 12387 Anonymous
26th November 2017
Sunday 8:45 pm
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The best pudding ever:-

• One sachet of chocolate mousse mixture. I recommend Green's.

• A few drops of orange extract. I recommend Sainsbury's Taste the Difference Valencian orange extract.

It's like an incredibly intense version of Terry's chocolate orange. Seriously, it's the tits.
>> No. 12388 Anonymous
26th November 2017
Sunday 9:56 pm
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>I recommend Green's
>> No. 12389 Anonymous
10th December 2017
Sunday 7:49 pm
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After a tiny bit of trial and error I think I've cracked the best vegetarian lasagna, if it can be classified as such.

• Roast peppers with a fucktonne of oil. I suggest two sweet red pointed peppers and three yellow/red/orange bell peppers.

• When you're done with the oil use it to fry five or six shallots. After they're nice and soft add in one tin of chopped tomatoes and one tin of plum tomatoes. Let them cook for a while before going at them with a masher. Add any tomato puree or salt as you see fit.

• Cook at least one big bag of spinach. When they've wilted mix in some form of soft cheese; ricotta works best but you can use any soft/cream cheese spread instead.

• Mix most of the tomato sauce with the peppers and use this for the bottom two layers of the lasagna. Use the cheesy spinach layer as the middle and the remaining tomato sauce on top.

• Top with cheese and/or breadcrumbs.

• Eat.
>> No. 12430 Anonymous
24th February 2018
Saturday 10:16 am
12430 Ultimate veggie carbonara
Step 1 - Remove stalks from a pack of mushrooms. Lightly brush them in oil, crushed garlic and black pepper. The best thing to do with them is to smoke them, which either requires living in the American Midwest, having a barbecue or either experimenting with your grill or burning something in the bottom of a wok (which you've double lined with tinfoil first) whilst having the mushrooms hovering on top on a wire rack with a lid over them.

Step 2 - Cook 500g of linguine until it is also dente.

Step 3 - Crack four eggs into a bowl and mix them together. Mix cheese, preferably pecorino or another Italian hard cheese but mature cheddar works too, until it's all thick and gloopy.

Step Four - Scoop out a cup full of the pasta water before draining it, but don't shake it completely dry.

Step Five - Mix everything back in the pan. The heat from the pan should cook the egg mixture without scrambling it. Add more cheese to taste and a little of the pasta water if it's not at the desired consistency.

>> No. 12576 Anonymous
19th August 2018
Sunday 1:41 pm
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Is cultural appropriation even possible when it comes to cooking?
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>> No. 12718 Anonymous
29th August 2018
Wednesday 11:11 pm
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You could fill all but the largest of Premiership football stadiums with the number of yearly deaths linked to being overweight. There'd be empty seats on a large sofa if you're relying on shot kids to sit on it.
>> No. 12719 Anonymous
29th August 2018
Wednesday 11:40 pm
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I prefer my units of measurements to involve double decker buses, Olympic swimming pools and Wales.
>> No. 12720 Anonymous
30th August 2018
Thursday 12:43 am
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Rigor tends to make it difficult for dead kids to sit properly.
>> No. 12721 Anonymous
30th August 2018
Thursday 1:27 am
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There's still more empathy points directed towards the dead kid sofa than the fat cunt stadium.

I don't expect anyone to call my inevitable heart attack a tragedy. It's entirely my fault, or maybe McDonald's and cocaine's fault, but still.
>> No. 12743 Anonymous
16th September 2018
Sunday 1:46 pm
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Don't you mean internet fridge groups?

>> No. 12184 Anonymous
30th December 2016
Friday 1:56 am
12184 Beef Jerky
I got one of these for christmas so I made some beef jerky.
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>> No. 12277 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 2:29 pm
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Have you tried using tamari instead of soy sauce? I have a feeling it'd work well with one of these; more umami.
>> No. 12279 Anonymous
11th April 2017
Tuesday 2:46 pm
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No. I'll have a look for it next time I'm at an Asian supermarket.
>> No. 12740 Anonymous
12th September 2018
Wednesday 9:38 pm
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I just got one to do my glut of figs. They've been going for 30 hours so far, and still have some way to go. Testing them from time to time - Mmm, warm, concentrated figgy goodness. Even if they don't dry out properly (I just quartered them), they're ridiculously nice.
Apples next, once the fig glut is cleared.
>> No. 12741 Anonymous
14th September 2018
Friday 4:27 pm
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Figs are pretty big, I hope you sliced them up first.
>> No. 12742 Anonymous
14th September 2018
Friday 4:31 pm
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>>12741 (I just quartered them)

they came out great, very happy with the results. Will be drying out all sorts of things now.As a way of smoothing out peaks of stuff from the garden, it's got a lot going for it - saves ramming the freezer full of stuff that isn't improved by freezing. Still throwing out over 200kg of duff apples a week, it's been a really shitty year for that, with the mad weather.

>> No. 12571 Anonymous
17th August 2018
Friday 5:57 pm
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Are there any decent cookery channels or videos online? I'd be surprised if there wasn't, but I don't know of any.
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>> No. 12730 Anonymous
2nd September 2018
Sunday 12:24 am
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His cats might be very well behaved by western standards but to the japanese those cats are practically feral

>> No. 12731 Anonymous
2nd September 2018
Sunday 1:04 am
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IRA subliminal flashes
>> No. 12734 Anonymous
2nd September 2018
Sunday 11:02 am
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Do you not know what the Indian flag looks like?
>> No. 12738 Anonymous
2nd September 2018
Sunday 6:05 pm
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Depends what you're looking for really.

Alton Brown doesn't really release on YouTube anymore but his back catalogue — and Good Eats series if you can find it — is a must-watch. Yank Heston Blumenthal with less of the pug-faced wanker snobbery.

Chef John's Foooood Wishes dot cooom is punny, technique-focused experimental cooking for the home kitchen. He's a good laugh.

Barry Lewis' My Virgin Kitchen is a bloke from Weston who used to be shit at cooking and is now quite good. Does a lot of those one-shot kitchen gadget vids too which can be entertaining.

Sorted and Jamie Oliver's channels are alright too.

For everything else (and entertainment value ramped up to 11,) I'd recommend Binging with Babish and his Basics with Babish side-series. The latter teaches you essential culinary skills in an easy to digest format. Not to say you're thick but you probably are if you're coming to us for help, let's be honest.

RIP Francis-san. It's not been the same since.
>> No. 12739 Anonymous
2nd September 2018
Sunday 6:54 pm
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Alex-French-Guy doesn't quite fall into the normal category of a cooking show, but he can be quite entertaining. There are a lot of mad and highly detailed ramblings about simple things like boiling eggs.


>> No. 12690 Anonymous
29th August 2018
Wednesday 9:46 am
12690 Time for this year's fungal infection?
The rains have fallen, the fungus is sprouting.
Can't seem to find this chap in the guides - doesn't look that appealing. Any hints?
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>> No. 12732 Anonymous
2nd September 2018
Sunday 1:32 am
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I haven't been able to find anything quite like it.

What I have been looking at to determine for the benefit of >>12725:

It is an agarics based on the gills on the hymenium (the underside of the cap).
The hymenium is "free" (it doesn't come out of the stripe).

Its annulus (around the stipe) is very odd for being quite so frilly, it is what is known as "ring".
I really can't find anything like the foot (the big arse blob the rest is coming out of).

I don't think it is a ‘destroying angle’, because it isn't pretty enough.
I don't think it is ‘the prince’ as it's cap wasn't dark enough during the early stages.
I don't think it is a ‘parasol’ as it is too white.
It looks remarkably like a false death cap but different enough from the examples that it might just be something similar if I had to commit to an answer it would be that.
>> No. 12733 Anonymous
2nd September 2018
Sunday 1:42 am
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Autist mushroom flapping
>> No. 12735 Anonymous
2nd September 2018
Sunday 11:34 am
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Parasol 1.jpg
How about
>> No. 12736 Anonymous
2nd September 2018
Sunday 11:37 am
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I'm not here looking for buttsex, btw. Just wondering if things I find while walking the dog will make a nice omelette, or kill me.
Got lots of these, f'rinstance, but they're just nice to look at, not particularly interesting for food or recreation.
>> No. 12737 Anonymous
2nd September 2018
Sunday 12:03 pm
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The stipe is different in colouration, it has that giraffe pattern on a parasol even at the early stages of developement,where as OPs mushroom doesn't.

>> No. 5883 Anonymous
6th April 2011
Wednesday 5:52 pm
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Why do a lot of people seem to rave about Nando's?

My friends think I'm a freak because I very rarely eat Subway or Nando's; as far I can tell it's just, not especially good quality, grilled chicken that has been marinated in peri-peri sauce. Am I missing something here?
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>> No. 12564 Anonymous
1st July 2018
Sunday 10:53 pm
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>> No. 12565 Anonymous
1st July 2018
Sunday 11:30 pm
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>> No. 12566 Anonymous
2nd July 2018
Monday 12:36 am
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>> No. 12568 Anonymous
2nd July 2018
Monday 1:55 am
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>> No. 12569 Anonymous
2nd July 2018
Monday 6:52 pm
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>> No. 12349 Anonymous
13th October 2017
Friday 3:44 pm
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Are there any other nice hot drinks that take milk? I understand how retarded that sounds but I'm starting to get sick of normal tea and coffee.
Hot chocolate is nice and all but not something I can drink all the time.
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>> No. 12542 Anonymous
30th May 2018
Wednesday 11:57 am
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I too am known to be partial to a nice bit of red bush.
>> No. 12543 Anonymous
30th May 2018
Wednesday 12:01 pm
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On a serious note, one of my colleagues has recently switched to this stuff in an effort to battle her caffeine addiction. Initially I was quite skeptical but she made me a mug of it and I was pleasantly surprised at how bearable it was. Tastes somewhere between a barley malt drink like Horlicks with some of the bitterness of coffee from the chicory. Holland & Barrett.
>> No. 12544 Anonymous
30th May 2018
Wednesday 6:58 pm
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Didn't they used to call it Mellow Birds bitd?
>> No. 12545 Anonymous
30th May 2018
Wednesday 7:22 pm
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Mellow birds bifter?
>> No. 12546 Anonymous
30th May 2018
Wednesday 8:24 pm
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Mellow Birds was (and is) just an incredibly bland instant coffee. Camp Coffee is mostly chicory, inexplicably liquid and markedly less racist than it used to be.

>> No. 12522 Anonymous
15th May 2018
Tuesday 8:55 pm
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Does anyone know what the full recipe for this roast veg recipe is? I've had a look on the Newcastle can website but didn't see it there.

It starts at 42:10



4 x Carrots
3 x red onions
3 x potatoes
4 x parsnips
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.
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>> No. 12523 Anonymous
15th May 2018
Tuesday 9:06 pm
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If it's Hugh then it probably involves wrapping a sleeping woman's hair around your cock whilst you wank off.
>> No. 12524 Anonymous
15th May 2018
Tuesday 10:57 pm
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Wanking with someone's hair just sounds weird and uncomfortable. Why can't he wank off with that person's mother's or sister's knickers instead like a normal person.
>> No. 12525 Anonymous
16th May 2018
Wednesday 1:25 am
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I don't see where he's used the potatoes. My professional assumption would be you'd roast the potato in with the other root veg, and the grated stuff at the end looks a lot like squash (or carrot) and cabbage, though celeriac and carrots would have much the same effect. He calls that bit a salad, so one would have to assume he's mixed a bit of vinegar and oil together for a classic vinaigrette dressing.
>> No. 12526 Anonymous
16th May 2018
Wednesday 9:49 am
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Let's hope, it's as delectable as Noble implies.

>> No. 12499 Anonymous
27th April 2018
Friday 8:57 pm
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There isn't a better biscuit than this. Sure, you may prefer others. Objectively though, this is the best. It's an all round work horse that doesn't disintegrate when dunked and maintains it's integrity when bitten meaning the can be eaten in bed when unwell or depressed.
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>> No. 12517 Anonymous
28th April 2018
Saturday 5:59 pm
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You may not like it, but Rich Teas are what peak performance looks like.
>> No. 12518 Anonymous
28th April 2018
Saturday 7:13 pm
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My vague understanding of the history of Western military conflict suggests the opposite; I thought simple biscuits or "hard tack" kind of things were what most armies tended to march on [in their stomachs]?

Sage for inevitably bringing our Corrigan out, I know mil-history lad can smell a boring discussion opportunity like a shark can blood in water
>> No. 12519 Anonymous
28th April 2018
Saturday 11:05 pm
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Another reason they're a terrible leisure biscuit. Rich Teas are basically council estate hard tack.
>> No. 12520 Anonymous
28th April 2018
Saturday 11:46 pm
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You can't win a war with a belly full of custard cremes, too rich, ironically.
>> No. 12521 Anonymous
29th April 2018
Sunday 12:29 am
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If I was blindfolded and someone fed me a Rich Tea, I'm not sure I could even identify it as food. They offer nothing remotely enjoyable to the palate and their very existence is a source of continuous bewilderment to me.

>> No. 12463 Anonymous
1st April 2018
Sunday 10:32 pm
12463 Cook books
Evening, lads.

What cook books do you recommend? I know you can get recipes online these days but it doesn't seem the same to me as having a proper cook book. I'm toying with getting Persiana by Sabrina Ghayour as I've heard Iranian cuisine isn't too dissimilar to Indian food, but with much less heat.
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>> No. 12464 Anonymous
1st April 2018
Sunday 11:01 pm
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I say get it, experimentation is the spice of life. If you're looking for something to give you a grounding in a lot of different home grown dishes, then The Hairy Bikers do a cookbook I like.

All their recipes were on the BBC at one point, but no longer.
>> No. 12465 Anonymous
2nd April 2018
Monday 1:21 am
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Most cookbooks end up taking space on a shelf with only a handful of recipies attempted and don't really teach the techniques and thinking behind creating tasty meals.

< This (maybe out of print) is the only book I've referred to more than a couple of times.
>> No. 12466 Anonymous
2nd April 2018
Monday 8:18 am
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Go to the works and have a hunt around.
You'll probably find something along the lines of >>12465 this one that might be good.

You get far more use out of something like that, than some flashy celebrity cookbook, or one of the many books that are quite specific (i.e. desserts, or Italian, etc.)
>> No. 12467 Anonymous
4th April 2018
Wednesday 2:06 am
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If you want Persian food then try Ottolenghi's books.

Do not attempt before really understanding the principles of cooking as outlined in >>12465.

Disclaimer: I am by all the metrics mentioned above probably a shit cook, and only mention Ottolenghi because he got me to buy pomegranate molasses and put it on vanilla ice cream and for this I feel indebted to him.
>> No. 12468 Anonymous
4th April 2018
Wednesday 6:24 am
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Why do something in 5 steps when you can do it in 45 instead?

>> No. 12431 Anonymous
20th March 2018
Tuesday 10:56 am
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What are the most bitter, widely available nonalcoholic drinks you can think of?

I love bitter flavours and want something I can sip throughout the day with an almost medicinal taste.

At the moment I drink black coffee and grapefruit juice quite regularly, but would like more choice.
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>> No. 12458 Anonymous
21st March 2018
Wednesday 9:46 pm
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How about some Marmite tea.
>> No. 12459 Anonymous
22nd March 2018
Thursday 1:34 am
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I used to like old-school Bovril though, the few times we ever had it. My nan convinced me one day that an Oxo cube was just as good.
>> No. 12460 Anonymous
22nd March 2018
Thursday 2:19 am
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My grandad maintains that the RAF ran on Bovril back in the war. He still gets hold of the cubes from somewhere.

I recently discovered that Bovril has been vegetarian for nearly 15 years. Can't say I ever noticed.
>> No. 12461 Anonymous
22nd March 2018
Thursday 2:37 am
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> My grandad maintains that the RAF ran on Bovril back in the war.

Bovril was just Officer code for methamphetamine hydrochloride.
>> No. 12462 Anonymous
22nd March 2018
Thursday 3:35 am
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>Bovril has been vegetarian for nearly 15 year

Also, Bisto. Changed our lives.

>> No. 12052 Anonymous
2nd August 2016
Tuesday 8:29 pm
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I'm reading a book by Neal Stephenson where he describes the emergence of coffee houses in England. He doesn't mention how do they prepare (steep?) their coffee though. And that is the question that bothers me a bit more than it should.

Any ideas? I tried feeding that to search engines. Got a few references to an old book but it's all that funny Old English, add being spectacularly non-specific.
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>> No. 12075 Anonymous
7th August 2016
Sunday 9:15 pm
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Learn to read annotations [1].

[1]a critical or explanatory note or body of notes added to a text.
>> No. 12076 Anonymous
7th August 2016
Sunday 9:17 pm
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It's not necessarily more bitter. A moka pot extracts more flavour from the coffee grounds than an espresso machine, so naturally bitter coffees will taste more bitter when prepared in a moka. IME you want a slightly lighter roast and a slightly coarser grind than you would use for espresso.

I think a moka is the best way to prepare coffee at home. It's not espresso, but it can produce excellent coffee with very little fuss.
>> No. 12077 Anonymous
8th August 2016
Monday 9:49 am
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By the way lad. What do you exactly mean when you mention strength? The aroma or the caffeine content?
>> No. 12402 Anonymous
25th January 2018
Thursday 9:40 pm
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I actually bought myself one. I'm satisfied; the coffee it makes is flavourful in its own way. A decent addition to a cezve and a cafetiere I already possess.

Not all beans taste remarkably well in it though. Coffee made from the last batch of beans I'd milled tasted bland; brewing the grounds in a cezve produced a noticeably better result.
>> No. 12570 Anonymous
4th August 2018
Saturday 1:23 pm
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This thingy - exactly like the one on the picture - turned out to be a bit more finicky than its steel counterpart. The latter is straightforward, the aluminium one has caused me some grief. I can't reliably catch the moment when enough is enough. Several times I've steamed my coffee into a way too bitter substance.

>> No. 4633 Anonymous
1st August 2010
Sunday 2:24 pm
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Look at this fucking thing, /nom/. Gaze upon it.

Fucking yum.

(It's five or six inches in diameter, in case the scale isn't obvious.)
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>> No. 12380 Anonymous
29th October 2017
Sunday 7:25 am
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No sign of any colouration when I cut or otherwise mangled them.
Went in an omlette. Was nice.
You're right that it's not worth a trip out to find them - but, when out walking the dog, I'm not going to turn them down.
>> No. 12381 Anonymous
30th October 2017
Monday 12:17 am
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>a punnet of perfectly good agaricus mushrooms can be had for just over a quid at Lidl's.
They taste nothing like as nice as wild mushrooms. You do need to be careful with agarics, though, agreed.
>> No. 12382 Anonymous
30th October 2017
Monday 12:32 am
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>They taste nothing like as nice as wild mushrooms.

Again, weigh your options. Mediocre tasting but guaranteed safe to eat supermarket agarics, or a wild card from the woods that could give you the shits or put you six feet under.
>> No. 12383 Anonymous
30th October 2017
Monday 1:46 am
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To be honest, if you don't know the differences between a death cap and a horse mushroom then you shouldn't even be thinking of eating wild mushrooms. Yes, you need to be careful, and I've written most of the scare posts in this thread. With respect, though, there's a point beyond which being careful is simply depriving yourself of a tasty meal. Avoiding horse and field mushrooms comes under that for me. (In this case, it's not particularly hard to stay safe from a dodgy belly, and certainly not hard to avoid an agonising death - just follow the identification guidelines, don't ever eat juvenile agarics, etc.)

Or you can limit yourself to finding good bolete patches, like you/the other lad in here, even if they are a 20+ mile drive away. I'm not meaning to be snarky, that's a valid choice, and if I had the option, at this point I'd probably avoid gilled mushrooms too.
>> No. 12384 Anonymous
30th October 2017
Monday 5:19 pm
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To me, as far as wild mushrooms, boletes just taste better. Personal opinion. I could probably tell a Destroying Angel or otherwise unsafe to eat mushroom from an edible agaricus, but I just like boletes better.

Also, I just love being in the woods by myself out in the middle of nowhere. I love the peace and tranquility in a patch of forest where you know there isn't a single soul around for a few miles. And if you have to drive 20 miles to find a patch with good boletes, then that makes it all the more an exciting event. Your basket (hopefully) full of boletes will be well earned when you drive home again.

>> No. 12365 Anonymous
16th October 2017
Monday 11:22 am
12365 Sweet Chestnuts
I've never tried collecting these and roasting them and eating them until last night. I enjoyed it! So much free, delicious food out there. The only thing was that I found getting the good stuff out of the shells a little annoying. Is there a better way of preparing them that makes them easier to eat? The guy at the park whose kids gave me their chestnuts told me that boiling them for fifteen minutes and then frying them is a good way to cook them. I might try that next, I'll post how I get along with it.
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>> No. 12369 Anonymous
16th October 2017
Monday 4:44 pm
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You lot know you can buy food these days, you don't just have to eat what you find down the park.
>> No. 12370 Anonymous
16th October 2017
Monday 4:55 pm
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Next you'll be telling me you don't go bramble picking.
>> No. 12371 Anonymous
16th October 2017
Monday 7:32 pm
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Can you believe black berries are still about? Not in bloom obviously, but a few stragglers here and there. I was going to eat one today but decided against it when I tried to pick it and it slopped off the stalk.
>> No. 12373 Anonymous
16th October 2017
Monday 7:48 pm
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Conkers can paralyse you. You want sweet, not horse chestnuts. Sweet chestnuts come in the impossibly spiky pods.
>> No. 12374 Anonymous
16th October 2017
Monday 8:09 pm
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How hard are you throwing them!?

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