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>> No. 82573 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 6:27 am
82573 2017 General Election polling day/results thread
Morning, lads.

As per .gs tradition, it's time for the separate polling day/results thread.

Results are expected slightly earlier than previous years as there's no local elections at the same time.
Expand all images.
>> No. 82574 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 6:48 am
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>> No. 82575 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 6:54 am
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>> No. 82576 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 6:57 am
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>> No. 82577 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 6:57 am
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>> No. 82578 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 6:58 am
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>> No. 82579 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 6:59 am
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>> No. 82580 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 7:00 am
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>> No. 82581 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 7:01 am
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>> No. 82582 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 7:19 am
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>> No. 82583 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 7:54 am
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Surprisingly dejected now that it's the day. Even already postal voted.
It's the knowledge that nice things don't happen, combined with the outside possibility of surprise. I mean, theoretically we could have an exit poll showing a Lib-Dem government and then find ourselves with an SNP-Green-UKIP coalition thanks to the nature of secret ballots and the Westminster system. But we know that won't happen even though you can't know until the results are out. It's like standing at the gallows awaiting a reprieve. Surely someone will intervene, I'm innocent you know...

In truth I regret getting into politics, but it's a Pandora's box.

*snap*
>> No. 82584 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 7:57 am
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>>82583
>It's the knowledge that nice things don't happen

The final Guardian/ICM poll predicts a 2.5% swing to the Tories, a majority just shy of 100 seats.

Facebook is already in overdrive. I've lost count of the amount of posts I've seen along the lines of "if you have even a shred of intelligence or humanity, vote Labour" so far this morning.
>> No. 82585 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 8:16 am
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>>82584
>if you have even a shred of intelligence or humanity

Why do people do this shit? I'm probably voting for Labour but insulting other people/talking down to them generally just makes them dig their heels in.
>> No. 82586 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 8:43 am
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Decision time. I've just moved out of a tight marginal seat into a safe one. Got polling cards for both.
When I signed up for the new place, I told them my old address. Am I criminal scum if I vote my old address this time? Is there now a note on the list that I've moved away?
>> No. 82587 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:04 am
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Whatever happens, we're seeing the end of neoliberalism, which is good. At the same time there s real possibility of real dolphin rape coming in.
>> No. 82588 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:33 am
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>>82583
Er, yeah, it wouldn't happen because Greens wouldn't go onto coalition with UKIP. In fact we don't believe in coalitions, we prefer confidence and supply agreements.
>> No. 82589 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:00 am
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>>82583
You just have to lower your expectations. I'm voting so that my candidate gets his deposit back.

>>82585
You should come over to the dark-side just to teach them a lesson. Nobody has to find out, it's like your on holiday by yourself and you've bonded with a cute effeminate guy who seems a bit curious.

You have to get on your flight by 2200. It's now or never.
>> No. 82590 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:15 am
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>>82587
>Whatever happens, we're seeing the end of neoliberalism
How do you deduce that?
May appears to be a continuation of neoliberalism, as opposed to some kind of fascist candidate who'd finally put an end to that nonsense even if doing so in a way that's really quite objectionable.
>> No. 82591 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:49 am
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>>82585
It's not exactly a one-sided shit flinging.
>> No. 82592 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 4:44 pm
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May to win it by 75 is my prediction.

I'm going to vote later but I've heard a few people say the polling stations have been far busier than at previous elections.
>> No. 82593 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 5:16 pm
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>>82592
Seems like they are this year, ours down the road has definitely had a higher turnout than previous years. Maybe Brexit and Trump have encouraged people to get their voice heard.
>> No. 82594 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 6:50 pm
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Muggins here only went and did a tick on the ballot paper instead of a cross. Hastily turned it into a cross, but it's so wonky it looks like someone with learning difficulties voted.
>> No. 82595 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 7:01 pm
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>>82594
As long as you've got a single mark in a single box it'll be counted.
>> No. 82596 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 7:17 pm
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>>82595

"A ballot paper on which the vote is marked –
(a) elsewhere than in the proper place, or
(b) otherwise than by means of a cross, or
(c) by more than one mark,
shall not for such reason be deemed to be void if an intention that the vote shall be for one or other of the candidates clearly appears, and the way the paper is marked does not itself identify the voter and it is not shown that he can be identified by it."

http://www.electoralcommission.org.uk/__data/assets/pdf_file/0012/87699/UKPE-doubtfuls-booklet.pdf
>> No. 82597 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 7:19 pm
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>>82573
>As per .gs tradition, it's time for the separate polling day/results thread.
No, by tradition the time for the results thread is when the polls are about to close, with some hint of the exit polls in the OP, but never mind.

>Results are expected slightly earlier than previous years as there's no local elections at the same time.
They changed the rules on this recently. It used to be that all of the ballots had to be separated and verified before any can be counted, but now as soon as a complete set of ballots have been verified they can be counted. Next time there are two elections on the same day (2018, 2019 or 2021), they will be verified separately.
>> No. 82598 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 8:43 pm
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>>82594
You can put a fuckin smiley face on it if you want mate.

I'm gonna have a fag and a shower and then go off to the count.
>> No. 82599 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 8:50 pm
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>>82598
I seem to recall someone drawing a willy in the box one time and it was counted for a vote.
>> No. 82601 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 8:59 pm
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>>82599
If it's a clear indication in favour of a candidate it's a vote.

Doubtful ones are decided by the returning officer, often with candidates agreement.
>> No. 82602 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 8:59 pm
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>>82599
Spot on.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/article/32658907/election-2015-mp-thanks-voter-for-penis-ballot-paper-mark

Rememnber, if you want to vote cock, it needs to be a massive one all over the ballot paper. (Australian sample ballot used, because there's probably some obscure law against using a British sample ballot while the polls are open or something.)
>> No. 82603 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:01 pm
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WAYHEY IT IS ELECTION RESULTS NIGHT ONE OF MY HAPPY PLACES. THERESA WILL WIN BY ABOUT 105. CORBYN WILL LOSE LOADS BUT HANG ON. TIM FARRON IS FUCKING TOAST.

I'm here all night lads.
>> No. 82604 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:02 pm
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>>82594
For the 2015 election I turned up on the wrong day at the polling station which is a community centre for the deaf. It was morning so I just assumed that all the old people really do go out in force as I waited in line for the bingo with everyone around me giving weird looks.

Anyway I get to the desk and try to tell them my details only to get a confused expression. I try to show the old man my ballot card but he just points up and in deaf speak says 'upstairs' so I go there and have explained to me by the care staff that I had come on the wrong day in between their laughter. I had to go home and have a bit of a sit down after that.

>>82596
It's a shame that we didn't get organized on this and have a ballot art thread.
>> No. 82605 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:06 pm
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>>82604
That is very amusing though. Who would you have voted for?
>> No. 82606 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:11 pm
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>>82597
>Next time there are two elections on the same day (2018, 2019 or 2021), they will be verified separately.
Slight self-correction: There are by-elections to the Scottish Parliament and several local councils today. In those areas, as soon as the ballot papers are separated, the Westminster ballots can be verified and counted independently of the others. (Annoyingly, Britain Elects has taken to referring to them as "downballot" even though that's an American thing that comes from having multiple elections on the same ballot - pic related.)
>> No. 82608 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:29 pm
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>>82603
I voted lib dem, but I still puked in my mouth a little on the way out.

>>82604
Was it your first time?
>> No. 82609 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:35 pm
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>>82604
What's deaf person bingo like?
>> No. 82611 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:52 pm
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>>82609
Probably goes on for a lot longer.
>> No. 82612 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:54 pm
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVbC0jASJYA
>> No. 82613 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:56 pm
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>>82609
Probably a bit like an NUS conference. One person speaking for a long time, not saying very much, no cheering and jazz hands instead of applause.
>> No. 82614 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:57 pm
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>>82605
>>82608
Lib Dem I think and I had voted quite a few times before but not at this polling station. I miss the coalition of chaos.

>>82609
Surprisingly popular but you need a special ticket to play so I never got to see how they called out the numbers. They managed to fill out a big hall anyway so I guess deaf people all live in close proximity of one-another which is expected but at the same time was unnoticeable when I was living there.

It must be a unique micro-culture. I should learn sign language one of these days and see how they get on.
>> No. 82615 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 9:58 pm
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It's weird seeing Dimbleby's legs. They're proportionately very slender.
>> No. 82616 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:00 pm
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Main BBC programme picture appears to be fucked.

Exit poll:
CON 314
LAB 266
SNP 34
LD 14
>> No. 82617 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:01 pm
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>>82616
Don't forget that one Green seat for the COALITION OF CHAOS.
>> No. 82618 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:06 pm
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>>82616 (self-bump)
The question here will be whether Labour are making gains in Scotland or whether the Tories are on the treadmill.

The more interesting part is that if that number is accurate, the "progressive alliance" is completely off the table, and the Tories might scrape a majority if both unionist parties in NI back them. Assuming Sinn Fein win 4 and with the Speaker out of the way, the target is 324.
>> No. 82619 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:06 pm
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>>82617

AVE FUCKING SATANA!
>> No. 82620 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:06 pm
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>>82612
Fuck me I forgot how hilarious all those forced digs at Corbyn were.
>> No. 82621 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:16 pm
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOT AGAIN
>> No. 82623 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:22 pm
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>>82573
Exit poll meltdown is almost too good a bit of the story to be true. Let us look carefully at 3am.
>> No. 82624 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:23 pm
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Reminder: Brexit negotiations formally open in 11 days' time. Government formation in 2010 took 5 days. The tighter the margins, the bigger the deals that will have to be made and the longer they may take.

Given the deep divisions between the parties, there's a Tory Death Zone at 310-320. Above this, and the unionist parties in NI will do it. Below this, and a rainbow alliance (whether coalition or confidence-and-supply) will do it. Within the Death Zone, both sides will have trouble forming a stable government.
>> No. 82625 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:28 pm
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Alright, cracking open a bottle of wine or two(three) and settling in for the night. Here we go lads.
>> No. 82628 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:30 pm
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>>82624
Oh god we're going to have another election in the Autumn.


ARGHRGHRGHRGHEG!@2121212
>> No. 82629 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:32 pm
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Make the girl dance.
>> No. 82630 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:36 pm
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>>82628
I guess it's true what the Tories said about Labour taking us back to the past. Corbyn's gonna party like it's 1974.
>> No. 82631 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:44 pm
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>>82624
>Reminder: Brexit negotiations formally open in 11 days' time.

Can't we postpone it? I just assumed Theresa May picked a date so close to the general election as cynical opportunism by thinking it would focus people into voting for her.
>> No. 82632 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:44 pm
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The exit poll value at 314 for the Conservatives includes around a dozen very close 50/50 calls against the SNP.

Best get the traditional election night Chinese ordered before they close (again).
>> No. 82635 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:55 pm
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IT IS BOLLOCKS
>> No. 82636 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:56 pm
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>>82631
It was the other lot that picked that date, and AFAIK it's not been definitely confirmed on our end. Earlier this year they were talking up "not until at least June", so presumably she picked the date of the election to get in before that. I would expect that if there is uncertainty, we would not confirm that date but would indeed postpone, though no idea for how long. We certainly couldn't start if there was the prospect of another election. That would be a real dick move on the part of May for both sides, since it throws the opposition in at the deep end and leaves the EU in the position of the people they're negotiating with changing halfway through.
>> No. 82637 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 10:56 pm
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>>82632
>around a dozen very close 50/50 calls against the SNP.

If the Tories cling on I'm blaming Nicola Sturgeon for banging on and on about a second Indyref.
>> No. 82639 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:03 pm
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>>82628
Look on the bright side, with our government paralysed we don't have to worry about any new laws being made. No chance of us getting embroiled in any foreign adventures either.

At last we'll have a chance to relax and get on with our lives without worrying about invading Iran or whatever else is just around the corner in these interesting times we're living in. The news can just be about the weather.
>> No. 82640 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:10 pm
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Makes a bit of a mockery of STRONG AND STABLE doesn't it?
>> No. 82641 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:15 pm
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>>82639
How many eggs can she fit in her fanny?
>> No. 82642 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:15 pm
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Looks like Newcastle has beaten Sunderland to the punch. Newcastle Central swing to Labour of 2%, Houghton & Sunderland South swing to Conservative of 3.5%. In both cases, more favourable to the Tories than the exit poll expected. Turnout looks to be a few points higher in both seats.

Given Theresa's fascination with STRONG AND STABLE in the face of the facts, she could well be coming out tomorrow morning with a majority of 10-20 declaring MASSIVE MANDATE.
>> No. 82644 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:31 pm
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Sat here on the Tyskie.

I fucking love Election Nights.
>> No. 82646 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:32 pm
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Ew, Labour HQ are having Dominos.
>> No. 82647 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:34 pm
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Rumours that Amber Rudd has been ousted in Hastings.
>> No. 82649 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:37 pm
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dem yoofs increasing the turnout
>> No. 82652 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:39 pm
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>>82649
Thats ARE JEZ doing his bit.
>> No. 82653 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:40 pm
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>>82646
I count 42 pizzas. That has to be at least £250 even with special offers.
>> No. 82655 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:40 pm
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>>82653
Hopefully they have done it on a credit card with air miles.
>> No. 82656 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:42 pm
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>>82653
Is that declarable expenditure?
>> No. 82657 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:43 pm
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God I'd love to spaff over Priti Patel.
>> No. 82658 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:47 pm
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>>82616
That SNP figure is bollocks isn't it?

Got a very sicky feeling though. Again, the bastards always want to give you hope.
(Actually, weirdly, I'm a Scottish Nat, but I'm very sick for Corbyn - or maybe just sick of May. Scottish politics has been so goddamn dull...)

Hope the Lib-Dems stay fucked in Scotland. Really do not like Jo Swinson.

>>82624
Death zone is very tempting. I've a strong feeling of an upcoming recession that makes me weary of the political risks of actually taking power. (Although at the same time, there's that worry that if we get a Heath-Stays-On, voters just flock to the Conservatives again in our 1979...)


Ach fuck this you know the coo will be back in with a majority by tomorrow morning.

>>82642
Even though I really do not want a majority, Tories returned with the exact same seat count would be a lark.
>> No. 82659 Anonymous
8th June 2017
Thursday 11:55 pm
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Ruth Davidson for next Tory leader if Corbyn is the next PM.
>> No. 82660 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 12:04 am
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At midnight, Labour lead 4-1. David Dimbleby struggling to count at this point. "Three results, four results, no, five results so far."
>> No. 82661 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 12:06 am
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It's 20fucking17 and the BBC's election results page still doesn't fucking auto-update. I thought they had a load of hipster web devs working for them these days.
>> No. 82662 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 12:11 am
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These turnouts are looking pretty high lads, think that bodes well for ARE JEZ
>> No. 82663 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 12:11 am
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I had a look at the newspaper headlines when I was in the shop earlier on. Our press really isn't worth the paper it's printed on these days. Sooner the internet puts them out of business, the better.

Voted for the Coalition of Chaos myself. Sounds pretty badass.
>> No. 82665 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 12:30 am
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Reports that Gordon is tight and Wee Eck is at risk. I'm calling it now: If it happens, headlines of "Smoked Salmond" all round.
>> No. 82666 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 12:39 am
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Ben Gummer, architect of the Conservative manifesto, tipped to lose his seat in Ipswich.

Former ELP keyboard player and next MP for Boston and Skegness, Paul Nuttall, not likely to win in Boston and Skegness.
>> No. 82667 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 12:44 am
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>>82666
He wont mind. He's been signed up for the next series of Top Gear.
>> No. 82668 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 12:47 am
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>00:30: We have run the numbers on Kettering, and once again, YouGov's hung parliament model is holding up very well. It is actually slightly understating Labour. It now looks as if, if the exit poll is wrong, it is understating Labour's gains.

http://www.newstatesman.com/politics/june2017/2017/06/new-statesman-general-election-liveblog
>> No. 82669 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 12:53 am
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Tories fail to gain Darlington, which according to the RO held their election on the 8th of May. Swing to the Conservatives smaller than Donald Trump's hands.
>> No. 82670 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 1:00 am
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Labour may well exceed what these exit polls have been predicting here lads
>> No. 82671 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 1:00 am
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15 results declared.
13 Kippers on the ballot.
12 have lost their deposits.
>> No. 82672 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 1:15 am
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Tories take massive SNP vote in Rutherglen & Hamilton West, Labour take it through the middle by 265.
>> No. 82673 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 1:34 am
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>>82670
The Yougov model that had Tories on 302, Labour on 269 is holding up very well so far.
>> No. 82674 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 1:43 am
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>>82673
Labour making decent gains though
>> No. 82675 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 1:55 am
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This crushing of the saboteurs doesn't seem to be going too well.
>> No. 82676 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 1:59 am
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16% swing to the Tories in Angus. 10k SNP majority overturned.
>> No. 82678 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:06 am
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Well this is getting interesting isn't it lads.

Whichever way it goes, it looks like May is doomed, which can only a be good thing wherever you stand politically.

And all those Blairite cunts who slated Are Jez have been definitively, how should I put it... Fucking TOLD.
>> No. 82679 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:08 am
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>>82678
>And all those Blairite cunts who slated Are Jez have been definitively, how should I put it... Fucking TOLD.
Yep, definitely a result of Corbyn's genius. Absolutely nothing to do with May being useless in the late stages.
>> No. 82680 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:11 am
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>>82679
Yeah I'm sure the increased labour-voting youth turnout will have had nothing to do with it.
>> No. 82681 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:11 am
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>>82679
Yet when I say Blair's main victory was John Major making a tit of himself...
>> No. 82682 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:16 am
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Fuck me, lads. I'm glued to the screen. I wanted to be in bed two hours ago.
>> No. 82683 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:17 am
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>>82680
Current swing from Tory to Labour: 0.9%. Massive shift innit. Given how she's handled this election, he should be crushing it.

>>82681
... people quite rightly point out that you're full of shit, citing the vote totals as evidence.
>> No. 82684 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:19 am
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>>82683
You mean the vote totals showing that turnout was already at a postwar low? 🤔
>> No. 82685 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:21 am
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Angus Robertson out.
(Well that's a bugger.)
>> No. 82686 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:24 am
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>>82684
Yes, those ones that show that in the face of a substantial drop in turnout Labour still gained two million votes on a 10% swing. That's not victory by default, it's a clear decisive result.
>> No. 82687 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:27 am
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So Scotland is going to prop up the Tories this time?

Jesus fuck.
>> No. 82688 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:27 am
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>>82686
I've never claimed it wasn't decisive. The thrust of it is that the swing was caused by the Tories being shit more than Labour's own appeal. (With the cascading effect of inevitability, etc, etc.)

Or basically just John Smith's alleged "Oppositions don't win elections, Government's lose them" outlook. (Even if the opposition can control the margins.)
>> No. 82689 Anonymous
9th June 2017
Friday 2:28 am
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>>82687
Might make it my mission to emigrate. We're a pretty loathesome place.
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