This should be in /101/ really, it irritates me when people say they're leaving or on their way when they aren't. I don't mind people running late, I don't like being lied to.

But what if I like lying?

The problem here is that while the legal market and the domain of regular work runs on +00:00 GMT (Greenwich Mean Time) the world of drugs runs on +00:n DLT (Dealer Lean Time) and the two are entirely incompatible because they are founded on opposing perceptions of duration and existence of observable phenomena in space-time.

>>6411
A dealer is like Schroedinger's cat. Before he turns up, he is in a quantum time state, where he could be 20 seconds away from knocking on your door, or 5 hours.
Repeated observations (bugging by phone) are likely to cause the time to increase, thus changing its quantum state.

People have always joked about dealers never keeping to a schedule, but I've never, ever experienced it. I'm starting to worry that I'm so middle class even my dealers have secretaries.

>>6414
Well Tarquin, coke dealers are more likely to be hyped up and on the go. Weed dealers can't be fucked to sell the stuff and just want to sit on the sofa smoking it.

>>6414
I would love to be a dealer's secretary. I think you actually just described my dream job.

>>6414
I know one weed dealer who is so precise it's actually kind of terrifying. If I get a reply at 17:51 saying "with you in 8 mins" I'll get a missed call at 17:58:40 and then he'll pull up 17:59 on the dot. At first I thought he must be some kind of meth freak or something but he doesn't move any other substances.

Coke dealers aren't always hyped up either, I once waited for 3 hours to pick up. Apparently the cops had raided one of his safehouses or something but I didn't really buy the excuse, the dude seemed drunk as fuck and not like someone who'd just had a near miss with the popo

I only ever really knew the doley-in-a-flat variety of dealer and they were unreliable cunts, without exception.

You get good and bad with everything, really. Some of them can be perfectly nice people. You'll see the "shocked at neighbour" type stories when people get lifted and no one suspected nice old so-and-so down the street was doing mad money from drugs or bootleg goods.