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>> No. 423374 Anonymous
4th January 2019
Friday 10:04 pm
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New weekend thread. First weekend of the year edition.

How's it going, lads?
575 posts omitted. Last 50 posts shown. Expand all images.
>> No. 424462 Anonymous
23rd February 2019
Saturday 8:28 pm
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My dishwasher has an 80C setting so I feel comfortable using it, though they do basically have to be 90% clean to go in so I usually just use it to keep glasses shiny.

My mum has the same unit and she A) fully cleans the plates before she puts them in the dishwasher, with Fairy and everything and B) runs it on 30C which is just fucking disgusting to me.

My first encounter with any sort of dishwasher was a commercial one that you just stacked completely filthy plates on a crate and it'd boil everything off them in about 30 seconds. It's a constant disappointment that home dishwashers don't even come close to that sort of performance.
>> No. 424463 Anonymous
23rd February 2019
Saturday 8:29 pm
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Clearly, they hadn't cleaned it (as I am now an expert). Every dishwasher owner knows that it needs salt every now and again, and maybe rinse-aid if you don't want streaky glasses. But its the corners/pipes/seals that I found today that were the root cause.

As I said, I have already been through this voyage of discovery with the washing machine. You do all clean your washing machines, right? If not, take out the soap drawer and start to have a look - stick your hand right down the pipes/cavities. Have a good look/wipe around the rim of the door and particularly all of the rubber seals, with some bacterial wipes. It's not good. At all. This process might upset you.
>> No. 424464 Anonymous
23rd February 2019
Saturday 8:31 pm
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Oh no, get one headshot for work and while I'm there I can get some posing done with proper lighting and that. There's always the downside that maybe those pictures will be the best I'll ever look but when else am I really going to have the excuse to get something done for the ladies?
>> No. 424468 Anonymous
23rd February 2019
Saturday 8:43 pm
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I dunno, maybe I'm imagining a different thing to you but it still feels weird - anything that looks like you paid someone else to take it seems like it'd give off a very odd vibe. Unless you look like a model of course, then it's conceivable a pro photographer wanted to take your photo.

I did have some DSLR shots in good lighting on my profile, but they looked candid enough to get away with, I think. Maybe not though as I've never got more than a shag out of tinder.
>> No. 424470 Anonymous
23rd February 2019
Saturday 9:01 pm
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I like washing the dishes, it's the most relaxing chore.
>> No. 424471 Anonymous
23rd February 2019
Saturday 9:12 pm
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Agreed. It's very zen.
>> No. 424478 Anonymous
23rd February 2019
Saturday 9:39 pm
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Running an empty wash cycle at the maximum temperature is usually enough to keep the muck to a minimum, with an occasional proper clean of the spinny doodads with a bottle brush.

Salt is only necessary if you live in the accursed parts of Britain that also suffer from furry kettles and scummy tea.
>> No. 424487 Anonymous
24th February 2019
Sunday 2:44 pm
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> Wait a minute, you have to clean dishwashers? I'm a peasant who doesn't have that kind of fancy space age labour-saving appliance, but I've always held it as an aspiration to get one one day, and be freed from the tyranny of washing up. Yet now you're telling me I will only in turn have to clean the cleaner, and I feel consumed by the ever cyclical futility of life.

Bollocks innit? And as the others already mentioned above, the dishes also have to be 90% clean anyway. So what's the bloody point?

Moaning thoroughly checked.
>> No. 424488 Anonymous
24th February 2019
Sunday 3:00 pm
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I don't recognise this at all. Plates get scraped off, pans get a soak if they're really encrusted and baked on. Everything goes in and it's run when it's full, comes out shiny. I tend to use pots-n-pans setting always, still doesn't take an unreasonable amount of time, power or water. It's a great thing. (Always had Bosch dishwashers, without any problems, even in shared houses with fuckwits).
>> No. 424489 Anonymous
24th February 2019
Sunday 4:28 pm
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Today I tried reading a book. Not for the first time or anything but it's been a good while since I did any proper reading off the toilet. Surprisingly difficult to get back into once you've lost the attention span even if I was always one to digest every sentence.

What I need is a good commute I think or maybe I'll set fire to my washing machine and go read at the laundrette.

I find that it depends. On a Sunday afternoon when you've got something to listen to maybe but not so much when you've just got home from work and have to do last nights bastard washing.
>> No. 424492 Anonymous
24th February 2019
Sunday 5:58 pm
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>Always had Bosch dishwashers

Mine is a Bosch, too - you need to check under the rim by the door and the corners by the seals. Still disgusted.
>> No. 424506 Anonymous
25th February 2019
Monday 6:09 pm
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Fenchpostspike.net sent me the wrong size metal anchors. They don't even look the same as the ones I wanted. For these ones to work I'd have to buy a dozen bolts and jam some extra bits of wood in the huge gap that's left to try and make up for the difference in size. Fuck that.
Despite my emailing them well before 4 they still haven't got back to me so they'll send new ones tomorrow at the earliest which means they probably won't arrive until the end of the week. I was hoping to get it all done today but that's fucked now.
>> No. 424530 Anonymous
26th February 2019
Tuesday 2:49 pm
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Cut the timber down to size. Made a bit of a mess trying to get the ends into bits that will fit together but that shouldn't matter too much.
Built a prototype trellis-wall for it with the bits laying on the ground so I know how much more bamboo I need now. For the walls, anyway. It's going to be wider than it is high so the "roof" trellis will need more. Hopefully B&Q have restocked since my last visit.

Fun playing with the new circular saw. It has a laser that shows you where you're cutting which is cool but utterly useless given how sunny it is.

Fencepostspike people emailed me saying they'd put replacements in the post right away which is good of them. Looks like an overnight delivery so that's grand.
>> No. 424581 Anonymous
26th February 2019
Tuesday 11:42 pm
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You're making me feel bad for not starting my project yet.

Might have to nick the missus' van and go get the timber for my decking this week.
>> No. 424592 Anonymous
27th February 2019
Wednesday 1:04 pm
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>Interviewed someone else today who was light years ahead of her and is after slightly more than the bullshitter said she was offered but this one actually warrants that level of remuneration.

I spoke with the recruiter today. This candidate has been so scarred by her current employer, incidentally my previous employer, that she's had a long think (and a cry) before deciding that she wants to leave the entire industry for good and is instead applying for jobs as a secretary. I know her direct dial; do you think it'd be worth giving her a call and explaining that we're nothing like the company she's working for at the minute; she will be supported, she will not be placed under ridiculous amounts of pressure, she won't have to deal with [too many] cunts? It'd be such a waste if she left the industry and she could easily earn upwards of £40k in this role, nevermind if she progressed. Would it make me look like a bit of a loon?
>> No. 424598 Anonymous
27th February 2019
Wednesday 2:58 pm
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Decking sounds a lot more skill and knowledge intensive than anything I'm doing. I've never used most of these tools before so I'm just mucking about building this rickety structure.

Spent this morning figuring out how to drill the right size holes for the bolts I have without destroying the timber. Marginally successful. Bolted the arches together and screwed an extra small block of wood into the corner of each so they have a bit more support. Managed to totally smooth a screw-head out somehow, luckily it hadn't bored very far in and I could get a plier grip on it. All done in anticipation of the metal feet things arriving at roughly the same time of day as the wrong ones had arrived but they've just been sat in the depot for almost 12 hours now.

Hopefully they'll arrive before dark and I can get them stood up this evening; rain's coming and I don't want to be working in the wet.
>> No. 424600 Anonymous
27th February 2019
Wednesday 3:11 pm
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Truly good people can be difficult to find nowadays. Why not give it a shot.
>> No. 424601 Anonymous
27th February 2019
Wednesday 4:25 pm
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I'll do it.
>> No. 424602 Anonymous
27th February 2019
Wednesday 5:09 pm
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No, that seems reasonable. I've been headhunted in that manner before a couple of times. If she's a good candidate it's worth a go. Just don't come on too strong.
>> No. 424603 Anonymous
27th February 2019
Wednesday 5:18 pm
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Yes. She has something to sell, but so do you. As with anything you buy or sell, appearing too keen only hurts your chances of getting a good deal for yourself.
>> No. 424606 Anonymous
27th February 2019
Wednesday 5:44 pm
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I gave her a call this afternoon, we chatted for about a quarter of an hour and she seemed very appreciative of it. She knows her mind is in a very negative place right now because of her current employer so I just reassured her from experience that not all companies are like that and not to worry too much about the learning curve of starting at somewhere new. She said she'll be in touch again once she's had the chance to clear her head and mull over what direction she wants to take her career next, so I told her there's no rush or pressure to make a decision and to come back to us completely on her own time.
>> No. 424607 Anonymous
27th February 2019
Wednesday 5:54 pm
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I'll be honest lad, you barely know her, and while she might seem like the perfect candidate I think the fact she's having a breakdown over it should show you she's a bit lacking in strength of character.

I'm not saying this is a weakness in her as a person, but just think on, do you want to put her in place and invest in her when she's clearly unsure of herself and might simply bail on you a couple of years down the line?

If she were a lad would you feel the same way or would you have written him off already as being a bit wet?
>> No. 424608 Anonymous
27th February 2019
Wednesday 6:02 pm
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I know the job she's doing and it is soul destroying; if she wasn't mentally drained and jaded I'd be worried. I still know people who work there, albeit in different departments to hers, and they've all had positive things to say about her.
>> No. 424622 Anonymous
27th February 2019
Wednesday 11:04 pm
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I worked for a consultant firm once. If you want soul destroying, go and be a consultant for a while. It's quite often hire and fire, and up or out. You were given six months to prove yourself, and if you didn't show an exceptional learning curve and exponential progress, you were out. Their mode of recruitment was to hire around five new consultants every quarter, of which the bottom two were let go almost indiscriminately after those six months. You were told this as early as your second job interview, and it created an atmosphere of mistrust among you and your coworkers who were hired at the same time as you, to the point that it was everybody against everybody. Our bosses believed that this would make us perform better as individual employees, but in reality, it created a climate of fear. Very little emphasis was put on team spirit, and it showed. It was really every man for himself.

I held on for nine months, and then left voluntarily the day after my third quarterly evaluation. I was just fucking tired of working for a firm that had a complete throwaway mentality with its employees.
>> No. 424628 Anonymous
28th February 2019
Thursday 4:19 pm
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Rolled about five doners from all the leftovers I found in my fridge this morning. Turned out to be suprisingly okay, tasty and filling.
Otherwise, a pretty bland day off, clouded by lots of shite happening at work and that place being shaky and unstable again.
Still quite glad it's a day off.
>> No. 424647 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 1:48 pm
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I can't imagine my life without work from home Fridays these days.

It's amazing how time spent not making small talk in the office or commuting can save you loads of time and tasks at the weekend and they don't feel any effort either because you'd be at work anyway.

Hoovering, ironing, nice decent lunch, bed sheets changed, bit of a tidy, gym at lunch, all done.
>> No. 424648 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 5:10 pm
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I've spent my friday getting into cuntoffs on a different website and it's been mostly fine, but I've hit a weird sort of roadblock.

The discussion was about whether or not twitch streamers who encourage, or openly tolerate, their chat to do dodgy things - like set off a text to speech in a library of a bomb threat, call the police to the streamers location, stuff like that - should be held responsible for these actions alongside the viewer who did the deed.

In the course of the argument I made an analogy comparing it to a bloke who is willingly surrounded by a swarm of bees, and keeps walking into public buildings where the bees all sting everyone, then acting surprised and annoyed each time the bees do it.

I thought that was a reasonably solid parallel and even hopefully a bit of a humorous image, but two different people responded to this that it's a terrible analogy that doesn't make sense because bees don't have free will and twitch viewers can't physically, actually sting someone through a screen etc. So now I've found myself fifteen thousand miles away from the actual argument in a debate about the nature of bees and what an analogy is or isn't.

I won't pretend it hasn't annoyed me, it's incredibly frustrating as I feel like they're either deliberately misunderstanding or thick enough to be confusing an analogy with a direct comparison.

So, sanity check, lads - is it unreasonable of me to expect someone reading that idea to implicitly understand that the bees are indeed an entirely exchangeable literary device, and that the nature of their sentience and logistics when compared to the humans should really not have to be spelled out?

I feel like I'm either being trolled 2 tears or I'm actually shit at analogies - I'm no longer sure.
>> No. 424649 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 5:13 pm
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Fucking hell, lads. We're now even having second-hand cunt-offs.
>> No. 424650 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 5:16 pm
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I did actually think "I need to ask the cunt off experts about this one".

We're just so much better at it than the rest of the internet.
>> No. 424651 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 5:19 pm
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It sounds like they're derailing the conversation by nitpicking your analogy instead of engaging with the point.
>> No. 424653 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 5:35 pm
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That's what I felt like too, it's pretty frustrating, not least because it's just boring when someone does that, I was enjoying talking about the actual subject, I don't want to have to switch over to explaining to them what an analogy is.

One of the blokes said "if the bees are sentient you might as well just call them a crowd of people" which makes me think that either maybe he actually really doesn't understand, or he's fucking hilarious and has successfully suckered me in.
>> No. 424654 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 6:17 pm
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If it's multiple people then maybe it's a mixture of all the above, who knows.
>> No. 424655 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 6:44 pm
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You might find this article useful. It sets out a hierarchy of argument, ranging from 0 (irrelevant insults) to 6 (refuting the core argument).


Really though, that whole argument just smacks of a lack of research. It doesn't particularly matter whether you think they should be held responsible, because incitement is a criminal offence - encouraging people to break the law is illegal, regardless of whether they actually go on to do it. The easiest way to settle an argument (rather than win it) is to just make a concise case based on reasonable evidence, cite your sources and leave it at that. You probably won't persuade the person you're arguing with, you won't persuade any fanatics, but most reasonable bystanders will take away the impression that a reasonable and thoughtful person is being yelled at by an idiot and draw their own conclusions.

>> No. 424656 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 7:00 pm
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>incitement is a criminal offence

Indeed, but none of these guys are going on stream and going "alright guys let's start calling the cops on me" or anything - they're just out in the world with a camera and a speaker connected to donations. That's the argument, whether that should be counted as incitement or not. I'm sure that they're still probably breaking some sort of law by having a bluetooth speaker blaring out a racist meme song on a bus, though. It's not really worth arguing as these lads are definitely cunts and won't last on any platform for much longer anyway.

As for the bee lad (one of them, the other one gave up I think), I eventually talked him round when he made the mistake of admitting that he understood that an analogy could either be literal or figurative. It was fairly satisfying but not really as the vitriol ran out ages ago.

That's a cracking article though, thank you.
>> No. 424657 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 7:09 pm
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cursed image.jpg
>incitement is a criminal offence

Where is the line drawn exactly? I remember having a copy of Steal This Book at one time and while you could argue the title was just cheekiness, it was completely upfront in its shoplifting advice.

My fellow poshos and I at school used to steal upmarket sandwiches from M&S and give them to the homeless. What larks!
>> No. 424658 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 7:15 pm
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Does incitement ever apply to petty theft? I don't know, but I feel like nobody has ever been charged for telling someone else to go and nick them some pick and mix, or anything like that.

With the book it really turns into an interesting question, I think it'd be a pretty reasonable thing to say that if a book shop is stocking the title then it's their own fault rather than anyone else's.
>> No. 424659 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 7:29 pm
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>Where is the line drawn exactly?

Mens rea. If I jokingly say "someone should give Chris Grayling a smack on the bum and send him to bed without supper", I don't really intend for anyone to slap the arse of the Secretary of State for Transport and it's highly unlikely that anyone would actually follow my suggestion. I said that someone should commit a crime, but I didn't actually mean it and it's clear to any reasonable person that I didn't.

If a gangster tells his underlings that "someone should have a quiet word" with one of his rivals and that guy is found three days later in a shallow grave, there's probably a case for incitement even though he didn't explicitly instruct or encourage someone to commit a crime. His hired muscle knew what he meant, he knew that they knew, so an offence took place; the question is whether a prosecution can prove it.

The definition is narrower in the US because of the First Amendment; incitement in the general sense is protected speech ("you should go out and shoplift to stick it to the corporations"), but it becomes criminal if it incites "imminent lawless action" ("you should go into that shop over there and steal a lump of brie"). "Steal This Book" is right on the borderline in US law, but I don't think anyone cared enough to go for a prosecution; it's definitely illegal over here and publishers have been prosecuted for less.
>> No. 424660 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 8:30 pm
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>Does incitement ever apply to petty theft?

Yes, although you'd be unlikely to be prosecuted unless it was part of some kind of organised campaign.

The kids who hang about outside off-licenses asking people to buy booze for them are committing an offence.
>> No. 424661 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 11:12 pm
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I need to write a biopic about Bernard Montgomery and convince Michael Sheen to star ASAP. He's so perfect for it I had to check his IMDB page to make sure he hadn't already played the role. And frankly I think we're due another WW2 epic, I guess there was Dunkirk, but I haven't seen that so it doesn't count, and other than that there was Fury, which really wasn't an "epic" in the traditional sense of the word because you spend half the film looking at some mud through a letter box.

All I need is a £200,000 advance on the script and something just shy of a quarter-of-a-billion dollars US budget wise. I think this could be a really fun project for the whole site.
>> No. 424662 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 11:45 pm
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This is the most perfect comedy sketch of all time. FITE ME.

>> No. 424663 Anonymous
1st March 2019
Friday 11:58 pm
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Aren't comedy sketches meant to be funny? That's not a patch on Going for an English from Goodness Gracious Me.
>> No. 424664 Anonymous
2nd March 2019
Saturday 7:02 am
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Sorry m8 but that didn't even illicit a laugh from me.

The best Big Train sketch is workplace wanking, at least.
>> No. 424666 Anonymous
2nd March 2019
Saturday 8:54 am
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I think the world needs a good Jack Churchill film.
>> No. 424733 Anonymous
5th March 2019
Tuesday 1:09 pm
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Are people from around Wakefield weird or do other people do things like having brown sauce on dumplings or eating stew on pancakes?
>> No. 424745 Anonymous
5th March 2019
Tuesday 5:58 pm
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Where did you see that?
>> No. 424746 Anonymous
5th March 2019
Tuesday 6:05 pm
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Around Wakefield.
>> No. 424758 Anonymous
6th March 2019
Wednesday 7:23 pm
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Can we do something about there being a midweek thread and two separate weekend threads?

I was sceptical about the need to break a general 'how's your week going' thread into week and weekend, but three just seems too much.
>> No. 424759 Anonymous
6th March 2019
Wednesday 7:32 pm
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Stop using this weekend thread and post in the new weekend thread? Only on weekends, obviously.
>> No. 424760 Anonymous
6th March 2019
Wednesday 7:32 pm
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You've bumped the old one, for a start.

ATTN ALL: please continue your slandering of Wakefield etc in the new Bangers and Mash weekend thread. As you were.
>> No. 424761 Anonymous
6th March 2019
Wednesday 7:35 pm
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He seems a bit one note, if you'll excuse the pun.

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