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|>>|| No. 423374
New weekend thread. First weekend of the year edition.
How's it going, lads?
|>>|| No. 423375
The gym was absolutely packed yesterday and as a result I felt like I rushed my sets and I've knackered something in one of my arms.
I'm going back to going at 1am, fuck this
|>>|| No. 423376
I'm constantly bored and I don't know what to do with my free time. I want money, but no one will give me any. Luther's an okay show but it would be better if it took place 25 years into the future, just because of how outlandish all the crimes are. The replacement phone screen I took ages to install is knackered or something in my phone is.
|>>|| No. 423377
Not bad thanks. Managed to survive the first three days back at work, although the first two were quite sketchy.
Looking forward to the weekend.
|>>|| No. 423378
>I've knackered something in one of my arms
Is it wise going back to the gym before you've fully recovered?
I hope you said goodbye to your colleagues when you finished for the day.
|>>|| No. 423379
I made a point today of greeting everyone cheerily and wishing them a good weekend when they left. I was the last one to leave the office.
|>>|| No. 423380
I'm very gregarious in the office - I chat in the kitchenette, ask people about their weekend, offer to get people things from the shops and always go around saying goodbye at the end of the day.
I work from home. My girlfriend left me. She says I need professional help. I think she means I should get a secretary. With all the socialising I do at work, It's a wonder anything gets done. It's OK, Keith has everything under control. Keith is a stapler. I like Keith. Always reliable, always gets the job done. Except when he's run out of staples.
|>>|| No. 423381
Honestly, it was the loneliness that used to get to me when I worked from home; ended up finding local cafes and places to eat lunch just to get out and actually see people.
|>>|| No. 423384
I was in Aldi earlier and the man in front of me in the queue was taking pictures on his phone of the 'packing station' signs. Very strange.
|>>|| No. 423388
Eh, 2019 ain't all that bad so far. I told myself I was going to give the flat a proper good clean\sort so it sparkles with the new year but I'm still slowly working my way through and doing a half arsed job of it. The biggest obstacle is the more I do the more I notice there's other little details that need to be done so I end up sitting down and having a cup of tea rather than having to think about it. I'm not living like an animal, I just want everything to get cleaned now that I won't have the motivation to do for 12 months.
Sage politely ticked for particularly uninteresting conversation.
It was a bit jarring how when he got inside it had the exact layout of an Aldi I used to go to. You'd think the lack of independent experimentation and local adaptation would bite them in the arse.
|>>|| No. 423390
ACTUALLY WENT TO GYM TODAY
And it wasn't heaving at all, as per the norm at this time of year.
|>>|| No. 423398
It's my girlfriend's birthday coming up soon and I am dreading it. She's in her thirties and she still views birthdays the same way a child does, so she inevitably has a massive sulk due to being underwhelmed that reality doesn't match up to the expectations of the super special day she's picturing in her head and the world hasn't stopped to focus on her. This invariably starts when she opens the present from her dad (>>/job/2552 and >>/job/5948) as he'll have either got her nothing whatsoever or some really cheap tat from the likes of Primark or B&M; he walked out when she was about 6 so there will be tears over the fact he hasn't made any effort. I'll most likely get shouted at for not making enough of an effort at some point. She turns into an absolute monster on her birthday.
|>>|| No. 423400
I decided to get back into keto. It's one of those things I don't tell people in real life as plenty of people think it's a dangerous or silly fad diet type thing. That's not helped by all the Americans on the internet calling it a miracle and saying it cured their depression and all sorts.
I do feel a lot better when I do it, though, it always feels like I have more energy. It's difficult to sustain though as finding a carb free meal out in the world is a lot of faff.
|>>|| No. 423401
I've somehow never had food poisoning before, until a few days ago.
I literally cannot stop shitting lads. Every ten minutes, just shitting, shit shit shit shit shit.
This is one of the worst experiences of my life. My arsehole is sore from wiping, I've had about 4 pieces of toast in three days and also haven't left the house in three days.
What a fucking disaster, no end in sight either.
|>>|| No. 423403
Have you considered throwing her a patronisingly indulgent party? Maybe buy her a pony or summat.
|>>|| No. 423404
Last year I took her out for a trip to the theatre, with tapas thrown in, with a few other little presents. Apparently I didn't make enough of an effort because I didn't buy her a birthday card, she knows I think cards an utterly pointless waste of money and trees, plus something else about only getting one of the presents because she was convinced I'd only got it because she'd prompted me to rather than doing it off my own back (although I'd switched off at that point) so that warranted a meltdown.
She's honestly fine the rest of the year, she just has one day where all of her daddy issues boil over.
|>>|| No. 423405
Honestly sounds exhausting.
I can't tell if I'm bad at the game, but have you never just lost it and said 'do you realise how spoilt and ungrateful you're being right now?'
|>>|| No. 423406
It will never be enough effort lad, whatever the bloody hell you do.
Do consider washing your arse. I doubt you have a bidet unless you are a Esquimaux but think you could make do with some kind of a sprayer attached to a wee plastic bottle.
|>>|| No. 423407
>I can't tell if I'm bad at the game, but have you never just lost it and said 'do you realise how spoilt and ungrateful you're being right now?'
That goes one of two ways. Either it's always everyone else's fault she's a tribal Labour voter or there'll be a lengthy tirade of how much effort she goes to for other people's birthdays/Christmas and how much voluntary work she does so it'd be nice to be appreciated for once.
>It will never be enough effort lad, whatever the bloody hell you do.
I know. This year I'm doing the bare minimum because she will lose her shit regardless.
|>>|| No. 423408
At least it's all confined to one day a year and you know when it's coming. That's pretty good, all things considered.
If it makes you feel any better my missus got hammered last week and spend a solid 6 hours crying about her dead dad (who she hated)
|>>|| No. 423409
My card was declined while doing my shopping earlier. Turns out some top lads thought it would be hilarious to get me to pay for their flights to Poland so put the card over its limit.
|>>|| No. 423410
Thanks lad, will definitely hop in the shower. Does make me wonder why bidets aren't really a thing here though? They're great and I love jetwashing my arse then patting it dry.
It's why Monzo etc are great because you get an instant notification so you get none of this bullshit.
|>>|| No. 423411
It's just a shame most fintech outfits are insufferable wankers. "Why, yes, we'd be happy to take you as a customer, just sign up here and join our waiting list, or get an invite from someone already with us." That, or "yeah, these guys are great, here's my referral code to jump the queue and give me a kickback".
|>>|| No. 423412
Appreciate what you're saying, it is annoying but I'd rather them do managed onboarding than free-fall and have a TSB mark ii and all their revolutionising of the banking experience be for nought.
That said you can get golden tickets for them fairly easily by googling it and Monzo have dropped the waiting list I think as now they've got over a million people as there's no need anymore.
Disclaimer: I'm a Monzo customer and participated in their crowdfunding for the laughs. I still get my salary paid into an older bank and move across my spending but damn it's good seeing a notification on my phone before the card is back in the wallet, the idea that if I get scammed I can just open the app and press freeze card genuinely helps.
|>>|| No. 423413
They only do that to control the numbers as they're scaling up - Monzo are accepting normal applications now, the card turns up really quickly and the on boarding and application process is about as simple as it gets. Had one for ages, highly recommended.
|>>|| No. 423414
>Appreciate what you're saying, it is annoying but I'd rather them do managed onboarding than free-fall and have a TSB mark ii and all their revolutionising of the banking experience be for nought.
Because those are the only two possibilities.
|>>|| No. 423415
They limited the rate of new signups to prevent their IT and service infrastructure from keeling over. If they could scale their infrastructure faster, it would obviously be very profitable to do so. It's fairly safe to assume that the two options are in fact managed onboarding or an IT disaster.
|>>|| No. 423416
I think the chance of somebody making a purchase on your card that you aren't aware of is slim enough that being pinged for each sausage roll you buy is more of an inconvenience that a convenience.
Not used Monzo (because they required a transaction over some nontrivial amount before to activate their services), but the way Revolut has grown their app to offer targeted loans and crypto-trading, I'm happy not feeding them directly with my transactions and indirectly with all the data their app "requires" access to.
|>>|| No. 423417
You do realise other banks do this too right? I have this conversation with other luddites so I won't get dragged into it but three things:
1 - https://monzo.com/transparency/
2 - You can disable notifications for certain things, or limit it to big purchases
3 - You can turn the notifications off altogether, and just log in with your fingerprint to check.
The big selling point for me with monzo anyway wasn't the notification, it was the fact that you instantly see what you've spent your money on, none of this having a different amount in your account to what's available and wondering where 70 quid went for three days bollocks.
|>>|| No. 423419
Exactly this. Making the IT for a bank is much harder than it looks. You have no margin for error, tiny margins of cost/profit to work with, and millions of very demanding customers. Its easy to say that large parts of retail and investment banking are being automated and jobs are disappearing, as this picture of what was the worlds largest trading floor shows and the disappearance of all the branches of banks in our high streets; but the emphasis has shifted to how good your IT and systems are and that requires almost as many (highly skilled) people.
I believe that in New York, Goldman Sachs only have two stock traders. Everything else is automated.
|>>|| No. 423420
I'm with HSBC because they gave me £200 for switching.
|>>|| No. 423421
How does that work anyway? I've heard and seen offers but it has always read like a free* lunch to me.
|>>|| No. 423422
Everything their personal account and app does is exactly what I want/need in a business account, though apparently their own business offerings are 'years away' according to them.
I'm enjoying this new wave of banking and it seems to be nudging the high street banks into better, more modern solutions. It seemed to take about a decade for Halifax to sort out a banking app that wasn't just a browser that took you to their website.
|>>|| No. 423423
£150 if you switch to HSBC and:-
• Have at least £1,750 coming in each month (for 9 months).
• Have at least two direct debits or standing orders going out.
• Register for online or mobile banking.
They give you the final £50 once you've held the account for a year. Before that I was with Yorkshire Bank; I think they paid £150 for switching but their administration was so useless that I received more than that in compensation whilst I was with them.
|>>|| No. 423425
I think they should pass a law that weekends are 3 days long. Still with equivalent pay of course, maybe even more. I know the Unions talked a few months back of how it was achievable by the end of the century but I want my extra day now.
It's a mystery to me how parents manage on 5-day weeks when as a single lad I've still got bits and bobs to do on my Sunday night.
|>>|| No. 423426
>It's a mystery to me how parents manage on 5-day weeks when as a single lad I've still got bits and bobs to do on my Sunday night.
It's only really extra washing and ironing.
|>>|| No. 423428
I realise this could go in /101/ but new people have moved across the road and their two dogs bark like crazy whenever they go out. I don't think I could ever own a dog unless I was retired as it seems too cruel to leave them alone and in distress for most of the day.
A fat woman lives next to them and she's just put her bin out for tomorrow morning. It's windy as fuck and it didn't even take five minutes for it to be blown over and I can guarantee she won't go out to pick it up or all her recycling that's now strewn across the street; it usually takes her at least three days to take her empty bin back.
|>>|| No. 423429
I think I just won an argument with my slumlord. Someone had obviously tampered the front door lock and when I tried my security key, it snapped off and fell out.
Papework stipulates £30 charge if key is lost, but nowt for broken. I went to him and he handed me a replacement and asked for the money. I told him the lock was broken, obviously, since he'd replaced it, and it had fucked my key.
The fucker told me I'd broken it, I stonefaced and said the CCTV showed another resident attempting and unable to unlock the door before I got there (we were both locked out that night), and my key instantly snapping in the lock, and he backed off. Wasn't expecting it tbh but I think I've saved £30.
Little victories. Makes up for losing my book of 'things that made me smile'.
|>>|| No. 423430
>...at least three days to take her empty bin back.
Have a word with yourself, ladm7.
It's not too late, you don't have to end up like every other petty, grumpy, boring bastard that cares about other people's wheelie bin habbits.
|>>|| No. 423431
If you put your bin out when it's windy and you'd have plenty of time the following morning to put it out instead then you're a cunt.
If said bin blows over and your empty bottles of Budweiser and knock-off Absolut vodka end up down the street and you don't go out to do anything about it then you're a cunt.
If you leave your old sofa in your front garden for weeks on end, eventually getting taken away by a neighbour after it has turned wet and mouldy, because you can't be arsed to ring the council then you're a cunt.
If the entire street can regularly hear you screaming at your kids because you're too fat and lazy to get off your fat arse and speak to them then you're a cunt.
If you think it's hilarious to leave your four year old son alone in your car whilst he continually presses the horn on several occasions then you're a cunt.
If you also leave said son to play unsupervised in the street to be a feral little shitbag then you're a cunt.
If you regularly drive your Land Rover to get a McDonald's whilst you're wearing pyjamas then you're a cunt.
If it was just the bins in isolation then it wouldn't bother me too much, but it's just a regular reminder that she's an obnoxious lazy fat cunt.
|>>|| No. 423436
>If you regularly drive your Land Rover to get a McDonald's whilst you're wearing pyjamas then you're a cunt.
Oh fuck, I do this though. Is it any better if it's a Range Rover?
I just don't see why I need to change out of my comfy pants to go to a drive-through.
|>>|| No. 423439
>If you regularly drive your Land Rover to get a McDonald's whilst you're wearing pyjamas then you're a cunt.
>If you regularly get a McDonald's then you're a cunt.
>If you get a McDonald's then you're a cunt.
|>>|| No. 423440
I'm certainly not a fan of Maccies, but it does in a pinch. What's the big objection?
|>>|| No. 423441
I can get McDonald's delivered here and even I have the decency to put on some clothes to answer the door.
|>>|| No. 423449
>60% real cheese
So in essence then, it's not real cheese but a mix of cheese and cheese substitutes.
|>>|| No. 423450
I believe they use vegetable fat. I'm sure there was a segment on Inside the Factory where they said legally they don't need to even contain cheese and can be made up of coloured fats and vegetable oils.
|>>|| No. 423451
>where they said legally they don't need to even contain cheese and can be made up of coloured fats and vegetable oils.
I can understand that real actual 100% cheese is an expensive ingredient, at least when your production cost is calculated competitively down to the last penny and a slice of fake cheese on your burger will be 3p per serving instead of 5p for genuine cheese.
But they should then not be allowed to call it real cheese in any way, shape or form. Or completely take the piss by branding fake cheese as the real thing by saying it was "made with real cheese".
If what you claim is cheese was made by you from only 60 percent actual cheese and the rest you put in is God knows what, then that's not cheese. It's cheese flavoured something, but not cheese.
|>>|| No. 423452
Nobody is being misled. Everyone knows McDonald's is shit and doesn't eat there if they are interested in being healthy and eating "real" food.
|>>|| No. 423454
You're missing the point I was trying to make.
If you feel you want to make a profit selling shit food to the public, then by all means do so. But you shouldn't be allowed to advertise your shit food as either healthy or containing "real" ingredients".
There should always be an unmistakable distinction between "real" cheese and the fake stuff. And just labelling your fake stuff as "real*" with an asterisk and then saying at the bottom of your advert that "real" means 60 percent real cheeese and the rest beaks and pigs arses, then that doesn't really cut it.
|>>|| No. 423458
McDonalds (or any other burger place) is not trying to save money by using 'cheap fake cheese'. American cheese, i.e, the weird processed orange slices we're talking about, are perfect for burgers. They don't have an overpowering taste, they're easily portion-able, and most importantly, when hot their consistency is the perfect gooey texture you're after, without being so gloopy it gets everywhere.
McDonalds could put 100% genuine English farmhouse cheddar on every one of their burgers and not make any less money at all - that's the realities of the scales that company is operating on. But if you've ever stuck a lump of cheddar in your burger, you'll know that it's actually not that good an idea. It works, sure, and it tastes good, but it's either a solid lump of cheese, or you've melted it so much that you've got a mess on your hands, and you can no longer really taste the burger or any other components.
Don't get me wrong, McDonalds still cut a load of corners in the search of profit, because they're in the food industry and that's the entire game, but it doesn't make sense to fault them for using the best cheese for burgers on all their burgers.
I suspect somewhere like Five Guys or GBK would never be accused of falsely advertising their american cheese as 'real food', despite them (and most other places) utilising the same stuff.
Not to mention that '60% real cheese' means exactly what it means, and isn't misleading at all if you have a handful of brain cells.
|>>|| No. 423459
>Not to mention that '60% real cheese' means exactly what it means, and isn't misleading at all if you have a handful of brain cells.
It wouldn't be difficult to start with a cheese that has a high water content, extract that water, add it to a product and legitimately claim it as being a cheese percentage.
Not that there's much water in cheese squares. Just sayin.
|>>|| No. 423460
AFAIK you couldn't do what you described, you'd have to, at the very least, label that water as 'cheese extract' or just more likely still label it as water. It'd also probably cost more to do that than it's worth anyway.
|>>|| No. 423462
Imagine my shock when I discovered upon closer inspection that my 99p cheeseburger does not contain 100% geniune aged mature Cheddar.
FWIW the 'signature' range uses real cheddar slices of a sort. Aside from The Spicy, but that one introduced Jalapenos to the menu so it's probably my favourite thing in the restaurant at the moment.
|>>|| No. 423463
>Everyone knows McDonald's is shit and doesn't eat there if they are interested in being healthy and eating "real" food.
To be fair, Maccies have done a very good job over the years of sorting themselves out. Probably due to consumer and political pressure but all the same, they're certainly one of the better places you can go for fast food.
It's a shame that for all their work they still get more more stick than Kentucky Fried Cruelty etc.
How is Five Guys anyway? I keep meaning to check it out but everytime I do I see that they're charging £7 for a burger.
|>>|| No. 423464
Five Guy's is excellent. They straddle the line between fast food and restaurant burger - good quality, but not flashy, no bullshit brie and chutney type shit.
They're certainly a bit pricey, but I don't think you'll feel ripped off. They're about as close as you can get to the sort of burger you'd make yourself at home on a griddle, which I think is really what you should be aiming for in a burger. Their whole shtick is that you can order exactly how you want it, a bit like subway does with their toppings.
They do their fries in peanut oil which is a very good thing indeed. The main issue is they do their burgers well done, which is an unfortunate necessity and not really their fault. They seem to use 80/20 ground beef so it's still juicy as fuck.
|>>|| No. 423465
The chillies they put in the burgers are raw, unpickled and the one time I went they forgot one of the toppings I paid extra for and there was far too big a queue to be able to speak to anyone about it.
|>>|| No. 423466
Like you say Maccies has only really improved for cynical reasons, but they really have improved massively. They drive a lot of farming in this country and as far as I can tell all their meat is unadulterated, you don't really need to add weird chemicals to stuff you're flash freezing anyway.
I'm not convinced there was ever secret sawdust or chemicals in their stuff. It's cheap enough to just use low welfare animals alone.
They also tend to be cleaner than your average independent restaurant as they audit themselves constantly. I don't think I've ever seen a Maccies with lower than a 5 on scores on the doors. They just have too much manpower to let the places go neglected.
|>>|| No. 423467
Yeah I can't imagine their customer service being the best, though I bet if you emailed head office or whatever you'd get a suitably groveling apology and some vouchers.
|>>|| No. 423468
McDonalds have built an international megabrand on the back of not being completely awful. I've never been served something truly inedible in McDonalds. They've never given me food poisoning. The toilets are always acceptably clean. I've never had an unreasonably long wait. On the rare occasion that they cock up my order, they sort it out immediately with an apology. When you think about it, that's a higher level of consistency than some Michelin-starred restaurants.
|>>|| No. 423469
Customer service can be a mixed bag. I recently complained to Frankie & Benny's and they replied saying they'd spoken with the restaurant in question and my version of events was mistaken, i.e. they were accusing me of lying.
|>>|| No. 423473
That consistency is the key. When you go to Maccies, it's not because you're salivating at the thought of a double cheeseburger. It's because you know it'll cost you a fiver, it'll fill you up without making you ill, and it'll taste exactly as you expect it to. Nothing more, nothing less.
With almost any other place, you always have that possibility that it's under/overcooked, something's missing, the service is poor, etc. But with a maccies, that double cheeseburger comes in five minutes no matter what, and it tastes exactly the same in Luton as it does in Glasgow.
|>>|| No. 423474
Bacon is an integral part of the order, so you order a burger, Cheeseburger or Bacon Cheeseburger. Pictured are the toppings.
|>>|| No. 423476
That's rather surprising, typically those sorts of chains will usually take the customers side even if there's no doubt at all that the customer is bullshitting, it's just better for business to never send a member of the public an email that might be construed as negative. I know this from bitter experience. Usually the only time they'll decline to take the blame is with a food poisoning complaint, for obvious reasons. Some of the bigger chains I've worked for have replied to a customer with an apology and free shit before even contacting the restaurant to verify the claims or even to check the customer even visited.
Then again, F & B are fucking shite so I'm not actually that surprised. They probably can't afford to hand out vouchers right now.
|>>|| No. 423477
The whole point is that toppings at 5 guys are free. Bacon and cheese aren't toppings and are a integral part of the order. So if you've paid for a bacon cheese burger it will say bacon cheeseburger on the receipt.
|>>|| No. 423478
Okay. So I ordered a burger and they forgot one of the main ingredients, which happened to also increase the amount I paid for it. Your quibbling over whether or not it's a topping is beside the point. It said bacon cheeseburger on the receipt, I checked.
|>>|| No. 423479
>But with a maccies, that double cheeseburger comes in five minutes no matter what, and it tastes exactly the same in Luton as it does in Glasgow.
I had one at the services near...the south somewhere, it was incredibly heavy on the mustard, I was most disappointed.
But yes, otherwise I completely agree. Maccies double cheeseburger was my fuel for about 3 years working nights, because it's consistent, quick - it doesn't taste like any cheeseburger you would make or would request at another venue, but it's £1.49 and gets the job done.
|>>|| No. 423481
Maccies is the real world equivalent of replicator food from Star Trek. People even complain about it and say it's not real.
|>>|| No. 423482
The weird thing about maccies is as a teenlad and unilad I loved it, would eat it anytime anywhere, then I sort of got used to it as a 'only if there's nothing else' (i.e. unknown place and no easy food options in sight, now I just avoid it at all costs.
I'm not even a particularly healthy eating lad, it just has no appeal to me whatsoever, it's so fucking grim.
|>>|| No. 423483
>they forgot one of the toppings I paid extra for and there was far >too big a queue to be able to speak to anyone about it.
Or you could've waited and they would replace it. They made the initial mistake, but not complaining about it is your fault.
|>>|| No. 423484
I don't have to complain. It's still their responsibility. I'm not exactly initiating legal proceedings about it, they can fuck off and so can you.l
|>>|| No. 423487
I'm a bit sad that my life has become so dull that I get invited to health and safety seminars more than I get invited to social gatherings.
The VIP Breakfast Safety Briefing in Manchester sounds like it'll be a right mental one, though
|>>|| No. 423488
It's their responsibility to give you the correct order, but I can guarantee that they didn't intentionally give you an incorrect order so the fact that you didn't go and get it fixed is entirely your own choice. They'd probably have given you a whole extra burger for free.
That you mention there was a large queue tells me it was busy so occasional mistakes are bound to happen in somewhere like a fast food kitchen. Can't be helped.
|>>|| No. 423489
And I was starving hungry, freezing cold and in a hurry to run an errand for a friend. No time to dawdle around babysitting staff to make sure they did their job. Can't be helped. Why exactly are you so eager to shift the blame here? I'm allowed to gripe about someone fucking up my order, there's nothing unfairly at stake.
|>>|| No. 423492
She's been locked in the bathroom for a while and I can hear crying. Her dad got her a really cheap looking photo frame as a present.
|>>|| No. 423496
She should realise she's not 10 years old anymore and won't get that rush of excitement I used to get when I got Lego for a birthday.
Life is shit once you grow up.
|>>|| No. 423501
My missus looks very much like Emma Stone, but gets annoyed or even offended when people tell her that. I never quite worked out why, but I think she thinks Emma Stone is a minger or something? I fancied Stone long before I ever met my girlfriend, that's for sure. I would have assumed being compared to any young hollywood actress would be a compliment, it's not like they hire uggos very often is it?
Maybe she's just sick of people saying it, I dunno. People say I look like Olly Reed, but I never get sick of that as long as I pretend they mean him in the 60s and not him on After Dark.
|>>|| No. 423502
I get told I look like a certain actor quite a lot, to the extent that a few years ago, back when I was a studying lad, I went from class to class with different teachers/fellow pupils making the comparison. I remember one day a girl in my class mentioned it to another girl who agreed, I went to a different class where a teacher mentioned it, then went to my ex's house where her family who were around for a party also mentioned it, all making the comparison from different films.
It also meant that when said actor was in a string of films, if I ended up going to the cinema to see it, somebody I was with would undoubtedly say 'he kind of reminds me of you'/'has anybody ever told you you look like [said actor]?'
Anyway the point is, like Emma Stone, media hype, sexy celebrity lists and general opinion is that they aren't half bad looking and are in fact super attractive.
It can be really embarrassing because whilst I don't think I'm ugly, I definitely don't have film star looks, and there's never really a good response, even if it is complimentary. What do you say 'oh nice, thanks?', people don't stop to think that if somebody has made the comparison you've probably heard it a million times before.
It can be scary to embrace to because for those that don't really see it or even those that do, you don't want to be seen equating yourself to somebody who is obviously very attractive. It's just not really a pleasant thing if you're a normal person.
On a weird sidenote it's not happened as often recently, yet the quality of woman I attract has massively, despite the fact you''d think people comparing you to an A-list actor with frequent occurence would have you swimming in it.
|>>|| No. 423503
It's the depersonalisation aspect. It's as though she doesn't look good on her own merits, people look at her and see someone else entirely. Birds put a lot of time and effort into their appearance, so in a way, it's really not a compliment at all, it's just lessening the value of their hard work.
For a more male example, have you ever got annoyed when you put effort into some work project or one of your hobbies, and when you show someone, they just go "Oh yeah, that's just like (thing somebody else did)"?
|>>|| No. 423505
Emma Stone is conventionally attractive, at least in my opinion, so maybe her looks don't translate very fell across sexualities.
I've gotten Mark E. Smith before I'd turned 21 though so she should count her blessings, all things considered.
|>>|| No. 423507
It's insulting and even dehumanising when people making such broad superficial and repetitive remarks about you.
>I don't see you I only see your vague similarity to an actor
|>>|| No. 423509
I suppose since it's more than a vague similarity she might feel robbed of her individuality, too.
I can't help but think I'd be well chuffed with that sort of comparison, but my self esteem is through the floor so I suppose that's to be expected.
|>>|| No. 423511
I'm addicted to PUBG mobile.
I don't like computer games these days, especially mobile ones, however this game is so addictive.
It doesn't cost anything and you can't cheat your way through because each game is about using what weapons you find as you go along.
You all parachute onto a map and it gets smaller as 100 people fight to the death. It's really addictive and somehow I keep winning the odd one too. Mental that it's free to play and they make their money from people buying outfits.
|>>|| No. 423514
For some reason my other half has started binge watching Father Brown. It's one of those harmless and mundane programmes they show on weekday afternoons after Doctors with the only highlight being whatshisface from Shameless' terrible over-acting, especially when he regularly shouts 'Padre!' at the titular character (Padwe! with his lisp.
|>>|| No. 423515
Oh, and the woman who plays Bunty is exceedingly shaggable; especially when she's wearing a tight fifties dress that accentuates her lovely knockers.
|>>|| No. 423525
It's just the Counter-Strike of the day.
Quite okay even though I don't play it myself. Still better than whatever that makes you to wank off through n levels of grind to unlock an AK or something.
Gor blimey is that XK150 in the background?
On a second glance, disregard that. Clearly something else.
|>>|| No. 423526
I'm addicted to 'Free Fire' which is an arguably crapper knock-off. Again free to play, they must make a ton with people buying outfits.
It's quite thrilling though. The only problem I have is that I keep playing until I finally win, which means it can take 10 minutes or an hour if I'm not careful. Oh, and because I started using it in Taiwan 50% is in Chinese.
I got out of gaming and consoles a while ago. So now, I can't really be bothered to buy a TV and a PS4 and copies of games I want, it seems a bit of a hassle. Very occasionally I'll play red alert online.
|>>|| No. 423536
BIN WATCH. The bin has finally been taken in, five days after bin day, because the wind blew it over and blocked her car on the driveway.
|>>|| No. 423537
In my street I reckon an old man would have wheeled it up to the front of the house on day one.
Get yerself in a cul-de-sac m8.
|>>|| No. 423539
My neighbour used to do this religiously and it annoyed me a little bit. Sure it saved me the job but doing it as soon as the binmen left almost felt like an affront to my manhood.
Is this how old men mark their territory?
|>>|| No. 423545
>Is this how old men mark their territory?
This and calling you Speedy Gonzales for driving into the street at anything faster than 5mph. Also advising you on how to do any external home repairs they catch you doing, despite it being immediately apparent that yes, Ian, I already know how to repair my fence, I'm halfway though fucking doing it already
|>>|| No. 423546
I don't know how to fix my fence and getting up earlier than an old man just so I can beat him to bringing the bins in would be a pain in the arse. I quite enjoy having old neighbours.
|>>|| No. 423547
It's just being neighbourly. If I'm home from work first then I'll take next door's bin in and if they're home first they'll take my bin in.
|>>|| No. 423554
I like mine too. They're weird, nosy bastards, but that's sort of what you want in a neighbour. There hasn't been a burglary in our street, full stop. Since the houses were built in 1988, they have remained under the watchful eyes of the curtain twitchers.
It does mean that I feel very self conscious that the attractive young lass from the flat always talks to me, as I know that at least fifteen pensioners are recording that information and will mention it to my girlfriend eventually.
|>>|| No. 423557
Been referred to a crisis house, which I believe is the nicer alternative to being put on a psychiatric ward. Not met the other residents yet but already having reservations considering one of the main therapies they're offering me is reiki.
|>>|| No. 423559
It'll be infinitely preferable to an inpatient unit. They don't send the real headbangers to crisis houses, because they're not equipped to deal with them. You'll probably have to put up with some airy-fairy nonsense, but you won't have to put up with a schizophrenic in the next room who hasn't slept in four days and won't stop yelling about Jesus. Inpatient wards are a bit of a last resort option IMO, but if you've been referred to a crisis house then it probably is the best place for you.
|>>|| No. 423567
I realise that this is straying into 'poor people shouldn't have nice things' territory, but the commoners at work are incredibly excited over the fact it's possible get a Toby Carvery delivered via Just Eat.
|>>|| No. 423569
Lots of things poor people like aren't necessarily nice, at least to respectable people, but they should be allowed to fritter their money away on such vices as they please.
|>>|| No. 423570
Should I still consider myself young and with it, or do the younger people think I'm ancient?
|>>|| No. 423575
heed my advice.png
Nah that's still young enough to be with it so long as you have a niche. Maybe not the proper early 20s stuff but honestly I'm not even sure kids these days can get understand all that noise.
Best have some money together though and plans for settling down.
|>>|| No. 423577
>Nah that's still young enough to be with it so long as you have a niche.
I don't know. 33 is an age where it's getting more and more sad if you still hang out in all the bars and clubs and get off your tits every weekend. At the very least, as you said, you should have some sort of life plan together and some serious adult goals. If you have that, you're forgiven for still doing the pub crawls now and then. Just don't expect to still be able to relate to the typical early 20s clubber.
There was a brilliant episode of How Not To Live Your Life, where Don suddenly dates a 20-year-old and very hopelessly tries to fit in with her friends.
A word of warning though - if you expect that your life is just going to be for all eternity the way it was when you were 25, just with a chronologically older you, then you will very likely hit a wall at some point. Which is then called failure to launch. It usually occurs around the age 35 mark. And the school of thought is that if you haven't settled down with a career, a family and a mortgage by then, it will never happen. Well, your bare minimum should probably be to have a steady career going at that age. As I am seeing and have seen with my friends, especially for the guys, age 35 isn't always the be all and end all to start a family.
|>>|| No. 423578
Ah shit that's going to be me. Turned 29 last year and I'm still just literally hoboing it around the world and having a laugh. No clue what I want to do and at this rate I doubt I'll see old age, but my god have I done and seen a lot, and met so many interesting people. May be worth it.
|>>|| No. 423580
Well at 29 you still have six years to dodge the failure to launch pitfall that is waiting for you in your mid-30s. That's still plenty of time to leave your overgrown boy days behind you and get serious about what goals you have in your life.
With any luck, you will knock up somebody in a few years' time and then you will be forced to hold down a steady job and get a mortgage so your son or daughter will have a roof over their head.
I've seen it happen that way a few times. It's not the norm, but it kind of seems to happen a lot to lads who up to that point in their late 20s or early 30s were really just dilly-dallying about in life with no real direction and thinking life itself was just a big piss take.
|>>|| No. 423581
I strongly dislike the notion that the proper thing to do is have a sprog, have a mortgage and a salary and settle down. You haven't failed to launch if you don't do that, just launched in a different direction.
|>>|| No. 423582
You're only fooling yourself here. And hurting yourself.
There will be a time when you will be too old to start either a serious career or a family, let alone then get a mortgage. You will see all your old friends of your age who have started families, bought houses and who have decent careers going, and you will be the lonely, bitter old sod who pissed his opportunities in life up the wall when he could have seized them just like anybody.
It will most likely end up being a very lonely and depressing place for you to be in.
I only recommend the route you seem to be willing to take if you are absolutely sure you will have no regrets when you are old about not having done what everybody else has done.
|>>|| No. 423584
>if you are absolutely sure you will have no regrets when you are old about not having done what everybody else has done.
What a depressing way to think.
Also it's perfectly possible to start a career at 50 or get a wife at 70, etc. I've seen plenty examples of both. The owner of the last company I worked with didn't have a proper job until he was 38 by his own admission, and no, he wasn't rich or won the lottery or anything. The only genuine ticking clock is the kids one.
|>>|| No. 423585
I'm the same age only I went and got myself a decent career-job last year. It's pretty shit if I'm honest with you. People talk about how you'll feel bad for it when you're older but the way I figure it getting old is depressing no matter what you do and no amount of stable budgeting is going to change that.
At least you're surrounded by interesting people all day. The kind who don't feel that South Park's humour is a bit too much for them.
|>>|| No. 423586
35 on my downward trajectory to 36 here. About the only thing I've done off that list to have a stable career (which wasn't exactly hard, I've been doing it since I was 21).
Got married, was awful, currently dealing with separation and divorce. Thank whatever god is listening that I never got a mortgage I guess she'd end up with half of it.
Where do I stand in the launchpad metaphor if I've launched and then Kill the whale! Cut his throat!ed myself into a wall because the journey was so shite?
|>>|| No. 423587
At the end of the day who gives a shit what any body else thinks, just do what makes you happy and if you can't then take steps toward it. I hate this bollocks of everybody working towards some unified ideal of life..Career man, a partner and kids, mortgage etc.
If that's what you want then cool, but it doesn't suit everyone.
I honestly wonder how you have come to this conclusion.
|>>|| No. 423588
I'm well beyond my thirties, childless and unmarried. I'm reasonably well paid, but I'm a rootless freelancer who drifts from gig to gig. I don't so much have a career as a Very Particular Set of Skills. I've never really had a plan and I've never really wanted one.
I do sometimes wonder how my life might have turned out if I had taken a more "conventional" path. I think about the lives I could have led if I had made different decisions, the careers I could have tried, the women who I let slip. I sometimes get slightly pitying looks from people who think that I'm a sad old bachelor. I've also had numerous conversations with drunken, tearful family men who feel like they're serving a life sentence and are deeply envious of my freedom.
The grass is always greener, but it's important to think about the sort of life you want to live and make intentional steps towards that. A huge number of people aimlessly stumble into marriage, kids and a career because it's just what you're supposed to do; many of them bitterly regret those decisions, but it's not socially acceptable for them to talk about it. A lot of those people will tell you that you ought to be married and have kids, because they need to justify their own life decisions.
Happiness can only come from within IMO. If you think that a career and a mortgage and a leased Audi will spare you from existential angst, you're kidding yourself. Whatever you achieve in life, your final destination is still a wooden box. You're definitely going to die and it's probably going to hurt. There is no meaning other than the meaning you create for yourself.
Personally, I just want to grow old without becoming a bitter old cunt. I talk to a lot of people who are younger than me but drone on about the good old days; as far as I'm concerned, that's a kind of premature death. Today is my good new day. My hairline might have receded, my face might be a bit wrinkly, my knees might hurt for no apparent reason, but I'm older and wiser and more comfortable in my skin. I have interesting books to read and interesting people to talk to and interesting work to do. For me, that's more than I ever could have hoped for.
|>>|| No. 423590
I'm 27 and the only thing I'm aiming for out of these 3 is a stable career which is something I have as long as I stick with my current job.
I have things I want to do, places to go and maybe even take the leap and live there one day. Something which I feel would be affected by a relationship/marriage and the chain around my neck being a mortgage. I'd rather strive for the goals I want to achieve rather than "the norm". Who said it had to be that way?
I will inherit my parents how though so maybe this has caused me to feel this way, otherwise at some point I'd probably need to take out a mortgage and be stuck with it for some 30+ years
|>>|| No. 423591
Every one of us has the ability and capacity to set our own measures of success and happiness. It shouldn't, and doesn't, matter if anyone else thinks you are successful or happy - only you can make that judgement.
Basing your success on someone else's metrics makes no sense, unless you happen to share the exact same aspirations and values as that person, and you probably don't. A lot of my peers idea of success is running a restaurant, but that's something that many people would find deeply unpleasant and miserable. Plenty of folks derive happiness from conquering corpse-littered mountains in freezing temperatures - I can't think of anything further away from happiness, personally.
I don't want kids and I can tell you with great certainty my life would be much worse if I had any. Just because you enjoy parenthood doesn't mean everyone else will. I'd be miserable and anxious the entire time, and probably do a good job of fucking the poor bastards up. Yet someone wants to tell me I'll regret not having any? Come off it.
It's something that's said so often it's lost meaning, but life really is what you make of it, particularly in the modern western world where we're relatively free. Telling others how to live in any more complicated a way than "try not to be a cunt" is just pointless.
|>>|| No. 423592
DON'T LISTEN TO THEM, LADS. IT'S A TRAP. BIG CHILD ARE TRYING TO DECEIVE YOU ALL INTO HAVING KIDS. STAY VIGILANT.
|>>|| No. 423607
I like this post.
One of my best mates just topped himself. One of the various bints talking to me on facebook just tried to make me feel bad for having a bloody drink.
What is wrong with people. Live and let live.
|>>|| No. 423608
It's not just the nappies, though. Kids are a massive money pit and first time parents are pressurised into buying so much shit they don't need.
|>>|| No. 423638
Young but not that young.
Seems a bit shite age bracket to me. Here it's like sink or swim, the area of maximal amount of peer pressure applied.
Looking at it from another angle, makes for a mildly harsh character test, if you cave in to the pressure and if you make anything useful with your life.
He might be serious just as much as taking the piss out of the adult values in a tongue-in-cheek manner. I'm unsure here.
> I sometimes get slightly pitying looks from people who think that I'm a sad old bachelor.
How does one brush this stuff off decently?
I reckon that the best way is to ignore it but there's always that one annoying sod who won't back off easily.
|>>|| No. 423643
>How does one brush this stuff off decently?
If you're genuinely happy in yourself, it shouldn't even be a consideration.
If someone feels sorry for me because I don't have kids and I'm not married, then they're just being silly. My life is bliss and we didn't have to spend twenty grand on a wedding. If they don't believe that I'm happy then that's their problem.
When it comes to family, you just have to be blunt. I told my mum long ago that she'd never have any grandkids out of me, and she was probably disappointed by that but at least she doesn't ask me every ten minutes when I'm going to settle down, like my missus's mum does.
When it comes to the average person who just keeps pushing you, I think you need to turn the question back on them if it's starting to get that bad. "Why are you so convinced I'm unhappy when I've constantly assured you I'm not?"
|>>|| No. 423645
I'm rather content. Also, would prefer not to deep-dive into the discussion which would prolly follow should I turn the question back.
|>>|| No. 423647
>but there's always that one annoying sod who won't back off easily.
The question is, why doesn't he back off that easily. If you're happy about your own success in life and have your shit together to a point where other people might even envy you, then, unless you're a complete Aspie, what is the point of going around lecturing a layabout who doesn't care for it about what he has been doing wrong with his life.
My own eperience is that it tends to be people who may or may not have it all, but who are deeply unhappy about their own lives for one reason or another. So they go and pick on an easy target, a person who, as far as they are concerned, seems to lead an existence just a few notches above being a bum.
When in reality, their aggravation at you more often than not stems from the fact that you obviously chose to remain outside of the rat race, but don't necessarily seem unhappy in any way because of it. While they will drive home that night in their new BMW M5, pondering suicide as usual, because they can't take another day of their own empty existence.
|>>|| No. 423665
I've had a few calls from ex-coworkers today who have realised that the place I worked at last year has been seemingly skimming the tax from their pay.
I'm not entirely sure how you'd get away with that nowadays, but I'm looking at multiple people who, according to HRMC, haven't worked for most of 2018, despite them all working for this company during that time. Again I'm not entirely sure how that's even possible to pull off in modern times. I suppose you would just not have the employees on the books, and pay them via bank transfer while presenting them with a fluffed paycheck?
For whatever reason they didn't do this to me, which makes me feel pretty bad but also very pleased I don't have to deal with it. I'll still probably get involved out of curiosity/sympathy though.
|>>|| No. 423669
Mine's a nightmare at the moment, though I've set myself the task of spending most of my next month of turning it into a proper workshop.
Her Indoors has suggested we tear it down and get more of a summer house/outdoor office thing going on. At first I was just glad we're not married as that would have been an expensive divorce, but the more I think about it the more I fear she might be right. It'd still be very much a workshop/computer shed/wank dungeon, but it'd have windows and that.
Anyway, show us some before and afters lad.
|>>|| No. 423670
I've just got the quotes in for my proposed new shed. All came in around £80k. Might need to scale it back a bit...
|>>|| No. 423671
Fucking hell, what's it made out of? Oak and caviar?
The idea for ours would be a fair amount of decking that leads up to a fairly large shedthing with a veranda and all sorts. I can do the decking and such myself so it won't be too bad, and we already have electricity into the garden so that'll save loads. But yeah, looking at the prices of some of these bigger structures, it might actually be cheaper to build an extension on the house.
|>>|| No. 423674
Shed-of-my-dreams, 20m by 10m, with 5m lean-to, to light industrial standards. That price doesn't include groundworks, floor or fitting out.
Time to rein in my ambitions a bit. Ah well.
|>>|| No. 423676
Fucking hell, you could buy a warehouse that size for less than that.
That's what I'd quite like instead of a shed, I've looked at them before. Maybe rent or buy a farmer's spare barn or an ex-garage or something and turn it into a big weird man cave. I like the idea of it being hidden away on some back street, a place to go that isn't at the bottom of the garden is admittedly very impractical but very appealing to me.
|>>|| No. 423677
Yeah, moving from agricultural to light industrial standard multiplied the price by three. Extra insulation, sturdier beams, bigger footings. Will see if I can get closer to a sweet spot.
Buying a barn somewhere would be cheaper, but I really want this at home. I've rented places in the past, and it's just a pain, long term.
|>>|| No. 423678
Just watching a twitch stream, someone else posted the exact same text as me within seconds of me, under a username I also occasionally use. I checked and they're definitely not me accidentally double posting by some sort of glitch.
|>>|| No. 423679
I feel like I'm shit at weekends and especially during the winter. How do people find the energy for it on top of keeping the place tidy? Are the long lie-ins doing me in?
What's your secret busy-lads.
I've had this happen a few times over the years. Communities eventually take your distinctiveness as their own.
|>>|| No. 423680
I tend to try to get the odd shit done when I get back from work, most of the day has been pissed up the wall, might as well keep my weekends as free as possible.
|>>|| No. 423681
Just do it. Also, what >>423680 said.
No amount of motivation beats getting up and being done with it in an hour or something.
|>>|| No. 423682
>I feel like I'm shit at weekends and especially during the winter. How do people find the energy for it on top of keeping the place tidy? Are the long lie-ins doing me in?
For me the only thing that's ever worked is cutting down on carbs. It sounds daft or like some sort of fad, I know, but I think I tend to overeat during the winter and eating a load of whats' essentially sugar leads me to crash in the middle of the day (or just lie in bed for 14 hours). And naturally I eat more in the winter and more on the weekends, so I suffer similar issues to yourself. I've never considered myself a morning person, but when I avoid sugar and starches in my diet I find that I wake up with the sunrise and feel pretty bloody good about it.
I feel like I'm coming off like one of those mentalists who insist Atkins cured their depression or whatever, but it certainly helps me.
|>>|| No. 423683
You're not thanking a certain member of the Father Ted writing team in that stream, are you?
|>>|| No. 423684
I'm watching the Trainspotting sequel. It's actually quite decent so far, but fuck me if it isn't hitting a bit too close to home.
The plight of the middle aged wreckhead is painful to watch when you're living it and you're barely out of your twenties. I wonder if my first dealer's still alive? I fucking doubt it
|>>|| No. 423688
It turns out my daughter's got worms, so I'm going to spend the rest of the evening feeling imaginary parasites crawling in my bum.
|>>|| No. 423689
I'm still on that stream, it's been fucking surreal. Just today it's had Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, John Romero, Owen Jones and Annie Wallace (I had to google her) on. Talking to a guy in a wifebeater playing Donkey Kong. Right now they're trying to whatsapp Corbyn.
It's not exactly history in the making but it's a thing.
|>>|| No. 423692
Not him, but I suspect it's the Graham Linehan revenge stream. He got people to complain to the Lottery about a grant they'd made to a trans charity, and this lad thought he'd try and raise a few quid. Made over a thousand times his original target.
|>>|| No. 423693
It's an utterly amazing and bizarre event. If ten years ago you'd have told me to figure out how Lindsey Ellis would wind up mugging off Graham Linehan on Twitter, and why, I would have never have come up with this series of events. The lad above said it wasn't history, but I'm not so sure. It's minor history, but I feel like it says something about old and new media, and who's kept up and who hasn't.
This is further evidence for my working theory that the world went mad post-Mayan doomsday prophey too.
|>>|| No. 423694
I'm not even sure what Linehan's problem is, but as he's the only person I've ever unfollowed on twitter for being a weird preachy ignorant cunt I have to assume he's the one in the wrong.
|>>|| No. 423696
I have no idea what's going on. You might as well all be speaking in Urdu, for the amount of sense you're making.
|>>|| No. 423698
Why does he hate trannies so much? I don't really have a strong opinion one way or the other on them.
|>>|| No. 423699
There's a section of fisherpersons that think being trans is sexist because they see gender reassignment as conforming to gender norms or something. Honestly I struggle to understand the whole point as it seems like a huge leap in logic to me. There's someone else knocking about on here who can explain it better, I'm sure.
|>>|| No. 423700
He's labouring under the belief that people are indoctrinating kids into being trans, and that any little boy or girl who plays with dolls or toy soldiers respectively is going to be swept off to a gender clinic and put on puberty blockers. This isn't happening and frankly I could tolerate him as just being out of touch if he wasn't quite such a moaning bastard about it, and, more importantly to me, he hadn't gone off on one at comedian Cariad Lloyd for, in an irrevent, comedic way, calling women "menstruators" while promoting a charity fighting period poverty. Glinner, formally Graham Linehan, is so far down the rabbit hole that he assumed she was a fully paid up member of the trans illuminati and went off on one. Eventually Lloyd took leave of Twitter because of Glinner and his lot's ire. After which he released a video in which he made lots of excuses, but no apologies.
That was when he tipped over from "confused dad" into "unbearable tosser" for me personally.
Look, look upon ye heroes and weep: https://twitter.com/Glinner/status/1087335369350221825
|>>|| No. 423701
>Honestly I struggle to understand the whole point as it seems like a huge leap in logic to me
Same. It seems like an utterly nonsensical thing to get worked up about and invest time in.
|>>|| No. 423702
His entire argument on twitter is that this specific Mermaids charity is pushing drugs and procedures on kids, but everything I can find on them suggests they're just another talking charity that offers support and advice.
If they really were all about giving HRT to twelve year olds then this would be a much more interesting discussion, but as it stands it seems like he's either lying or misrepresenting the facts just to have a good old whinge.
|>>|| No. 423703
The logic is that trans women are men invading women's spaces and trying to hijack fishing for men. Which makes some sense, and is also absurd. You can follow the logical progression even if you don't agree. The issue they take with the Mermaids charity in particular is that it helps people under 16 to transition. That makes some sense too, if we're following the same logic that teenagers and children are stupid and can't consent to various things or make certain important decisions for themselves. Although it also makes no sense because the people's parents have to be involved in that decision and they're separately worried about bad parents pushing children who wouldn't choose to into transitioning. This seems like a contradiction to the other problem but whatever.
But it gets weirder. Linehan and his twitter friends are also claiming that allowing younger people to transition is homophobic, because if you let someone switch gender then they'll no longer be gay, as well as causing them to be sterilised which is bad because it's the same as what happened to Turing, a sort of eugenics and gay erasure. In their words, it's Gamergate all over again.
|>>|| No. 423704
Wait a minute... turning a man who is attracted to men into a woman who fancies men is homophobic?
Some people have too much time on their hands.
|>>|| No. 423705
>Look, look upon ye heroes and weep:
Calling HBomb and his friends MRAs is truly fucking bizarre.
|>>|| No. 423706
>The logic is that trans women are men invading women's spaces and trying to hijack fishing for men
That doesn't really seem logical to me, unless you're under the impression that mtf trans people are literally just disguising themselves as women for political purposes, or for a laugh?
I really can't follow the logic there, to be honest. Do they think MtF people are deliberately transitioning simply to jump on the trend? I don't understand.
|>>|| No. 423707
I just mean I can understand why some people might consider trans women as men. Not that I agree, I just can understand the perspective.
The rest I really have no explanation for.
|>>|| No. 423708
>That doesn't really seem logical to me, unless you're under the impression that mtf trans people are literally just disguising themselves as women for political purposes, or for a laugh?
I think there's the fear that some men are claiming they're female to get into female spaces and perve on them. There has been a few incidences of this happening, like that bloke who managed to wangle his way into a women's prison.
|>>|| No. 423709
Oh, yeah - I understand that part, but getting from that to where we are now boggles the mind, particularly because the people we're talking about are supposed to be self-proclaimed left wing snowflake types. They're literally using the same arguments a bible belt republican would use, then tacking on "because women's rights" at the end. Utterly baffling.
|>>|| No. 423710
My take-away from it is that a lot of the time it's actually Bible Belt Republican types appropriating fisherperson arguments for their own purposes. Or at least people who grew up with Conservative, perhaps even Catholic backgrounds who think of themselves as fisherpersons.
|>>|| No. 423711
>perhaps even Catholic backgrounds
Fuck, I never thought of that. It makes a lot of sense now.
Them priests never really get their claws out of you, do they
|>>|| No. 423720
He seems to be doubling down on the whole "trans kids are just confused gay kids" angle.
I'm not an expert but aren't a majority of trans women lesbians? As in, attracted to other women? Even if that's not the case and there's more of a mixture, Glinner's position is utter nonsense. The mind boggles.
|>>|| No. 423725
Is it strange how much time and energy has been put in to discussing and debating such a minute sub-section of society?
I mean, I think that trans people should be able to live a free and fulfilling life with fair rights. it just seems like it's a strange hill to die on for many people when it only relates to maybe 0.1% of the population.
|>>|| No. 423726
It's a good example of the perils of performative fishing. Glinner has aligned himself with the TERFs - there are some famous/prolific radical fisherpersons who more or less believe that trans people are just men dressing up and muscling in on their act. You've more likelihood of hearing rational debate by a Brexiteer, MAGA, flat-earth type than you will hanging around the TERFs/trans groups online; the discourse seems very poisonous on all sides.
I'm not sure what the answer is but I know the internet definitely isn't helping. It all felt so optimistic a few years back, whereas recently I have felt quite depressed by the negative effects it is having on society.
Put another way - why did we ever think letting everyone in the world communicate with each other would be a good idea?
(ps for the avoidance of doubt, I think Glinner is a bigot)
|>>|| No. 423727
It's particularly strange as he seems to have dedicated himself to this cause, tweeting about very little else for years now. Even today, he stopped tweeting about it at 2am then resumed at 5am. It's bizarre.
With the emergence of this and the Qanon stuff and a lot of other things I'm inclined to agree. The internet isn't getting the truth out there, it's just getting whatever nonsense people get excited about very widespread. I think it's been posted about before but there are twitter accounts posting basically the same stuff as are Em, but with hundreds of thousands of followers. We're entering some very strange consensual realities.
|>>|| No. 423728
>Put another way - why did we ever think letting everyone in the world communicate with each other would be a good idea?
Normies ruined everything. The internet was at its best when it was a place to dick around and everything wasn't taken super seriously.
|>>|| No. 423729
Smartphones ruined everything.
Or the eternal September did, depending on your point of view.
|>>|| No. 423730
>The internet isn't getting the truth out there
It really isn't - over the past two years, I have felt more negative about the internet than I have over the past 30 years using it. I mean, I'm sure there's a bit of inverted snobbery there, it's all so mainstream now.
>everything wasn't taken super seriously
Exactly this - where has all the fun and silliness gone?
|>>|| No. 423731
Social media has hacked our brains.
The world has always been full of nutters who are obsessed with marginal viewpoints, but they didn't always have a platform. They used to write letters to the editor in green ink or leave angry messages on the BBC answerphone. They used to produce photocopied newsletters that circulated amongst alternative bookshops and a small group of fellow lunatics. The particularly determined ones bought a sandwich board and a megaphone or went to Speaker's Corner. We understood through context that these people were fringe weirdos and that their opinions didn't matter very much.
Social media has stripped away a lot of that context. There are a vanishingly small number of TERFs in the wild - only eight of them turned up to that protest at London Pride - but they look more numerous than they really are because they're highly active on social media. Glinner posted over 17,000 tweets in the last year, most of them related to trans issues; some of his fellow travellers are far more prolific. We'll retweet or reply to a tweet that we think is outrageous, without checking that person's timeline to see if they're just a nutter.
I think that social media lies in an awkward middle ground between "having a conversation with friends" and "shouting at strangers in the street". If a friend says something outrageous, we feel obliged to challenge them. If a stranger with a megaphone was shouting that same opinion on the high street, we'd just ignore them. It would be weird to stop and have a heated debate with a Christian evangelist, but somehow it's less weird if you do it on the internet.
I think we all need to get used to the idea that a) nutters on the internet will spend a huge amount of time advancing their mad ideas and b) paying attention to them only amplifies their audience and lends their opinions credence. We've allowed a handful of crackpots to completely distort our perception of the zeitgeist. There are just shy of eight billion people in the world, half of them are on the internet and a lot of them are absolutely fucking mental.
|>>|| No. 423732
I think the big problem is the media has taken Twitter and others to be some easy source of vox pops, but really it's the voice of a bunch of nutters. There needs to be a cultural shift where Twitter is thought of as being down at the same level as say 4chan. Both are just an unfiltered stream of random shit from a whole bunch of maladjusted people. Or I'd like to see the BBC look to 4chan for some vox pops too.
|>>|| No. 423733
Exactly this. The internet has made it easier for people with fringe viewpoints to find other fruitloops and they validate one another's opinions. This is exacerbated by the media being lazy and relying on Twitter for news, giving unwarranted credibility to what is posted there and elevating nonsense posted there to being worthy of national attention.
We're also in the age of cherry picking and conspiracy theories. The internet has made everything far more tribal and all sorts of groups, from Jeremy Corbyn fans to Tommy Robinson fans, regularly talk about how the mainstream establishment cannot be trusted. There's a lot of poor journalism out there, which these groups excel at pointing out, but that doesn't mean the bollocks they come up with is any better.
|>>|| No. 423734
This also neatly explains why Glinner and his lot are so angry about trans people - because they too are so active online, it makes it look like half the population is transitioning, whereas the number is really quite negligible. So of course the TERFs are going to think the sky is falling too.
|>>|| No. 423735
If this particular sky did fall all the way it would be ideal. We just need to get better at doing sex changes to the point they're fully reversible and people can switch just for a holiday, on a whim. Bring on the lab grown genitals. Nobody need worry about regretting their procedures or peope doing it on their behalf or anything.
|>>|| No. 423736
After his marathon 57 hour stream, Hbomberguy is being accused of embezzling a portion of the funds raised, he's told fans "that money was just resting in my account".
|>>|| No. 423740
Also, I think a lot of the issues we have today are due to the fact that news is becoming increasingly disposable. It's news pitched at people with limited attention spans.
Many people no longer properly read news articles and instead give it a quick skim before racing to the comments sections. People don't actually want to read the news and instead prefer the likes of pithy image macros which validate their pre-held beliefs but are overly simplistic and should only be taken at face value.
If you watch the news on the telly then it has noticeably moved away from "this is the news" to "this is the news and this is how it should make you feel." You've only got to look at the likes of Question Time or scientific programmes on the BBC to see how far things are being dumbed down.
We're now in the situation where everyone is in their polarised enclave and you're either with them or against them. People have lost all sense of nuance and debate so they just resort to hurling insults, but the people who are against you are evil and morally wrong so they fully deserve the abuse.
|>>|| No. 423742
I think mum let some gyspsy lads case the house over the weekend and I just scared them off. I can't think why else a black transit van would briefly show up in the morning with one bloke in it, then show up again hours later, but with two or three lads who then scarpered before I could get to the front door. I am very paranoid, but I've listened to enough Danny Brown to know how this shit works.
I know, I thought that article is a joke. They had to acknowledge it happened, but I think their thonk piece writers are split on the whole TERF thing so they played an ultra-safe one. However, I think reporting like that is willfully misleading and if that's all you knew about the stream you'd be almost totally uninformed about it.
|>>|| No. 423743
It mentions Linehan fleetingly, but the entire narrative to the article is sticking it to the alt-right and toxic cis male gamers rather than this being about the bloke who wrote Father Ted and his TERF mates. Their narrative is diametrically opposed to what has been discussed about the stream on here.
|>>|| No. 423745
The problem with the narrative is on the Guardian's head, not ours. I didn't think I'd have to say this on this website, but do googling yourself and you'll see what really happened. Again, the stream only happened because Graham Linehan complained to the lottery commission about giving the Mermaids charity a grant. That's an absolute fact, and you should be able to glean from it whether the problem was TERFS or Alt-Righters (hint : it's both, but Glinner is a TERF)
Also, this tweet they used really got to me. When the fuck has gaming ever been about 'dudebros'? Aren't we all nerds who've never seen sunlight?
|>>|| No. 423746
>The problem with the narrative is on the Guardian's head, not ours. I didn't think I'd have to say this on this website, but do googling yourself and you'll see what really happened.
Outside of the three of us, do you think most people are going to 'Google what really happened' for every event out there and conduct their own research or are they just going to accept what they've read in the paper?
|>>|| No. 423748
I'm not talking about most people, I'm talking about the lad that came on here to accuse the other two of us of being alt-right shills. I'm not trying to make a point about the wider public, I even said "I didn't think I'd have to say this on this website".
|>>|| No. 423750
I'm pretty sure he was, but even if I'm wrong I was still just talking to him, not the public at large.
|>>|| No. 423757
Mumsnet can fuck off and all. Apparently Kiwifarms of all places having a thread about HBomberguy is evidence he's bad. Kiwifarms. Fucking strange bedfellows.
|>>|| No. 423761
Yadda yadda yadda, Chris Chan, yadda yadda yadda.
Sounds like a place not even worth bothering a moment's thought over. Also, why the fuck have I received Wetherspoon News through my letterbox?
|>>|| No. 423769
>Also, why the fuck have I received Wetherspoon News through my letterbox?
I assume you must me on a list of raging alkies. That or they've just sent it to everyone in your area.
|>>|| No. 423770
>I assume you must me on a list of raging alkies.
The question is, how did britfa.gs get our addresses?
|>>|| No. 423812
> why did we ever think letting everyone in the world communicate with each other would be a good idea?
So we know what they are thinking.
|>>|| No. 423813
Is it acceptable to swear at children? I may have just called a girl in year 9/10 a daft cunt for walking into me because she was too oblivious too look where she was going.
|>>|| No. 423814
It takes two to tango, mate, but I understand how you could get frustrated by that kind of thing. I think you'd have been better off not swearing, because then whoever's wronged you can just think to themselves "wow, what a mad bastard" and never have to consider their ignorant behaviour, you big rude twat you. Also you're a fully grown bloke and she's a 14 or 15 year old girl, so you probably looked more frightening than you meant to.
|>>|| No. 423815
Thinking about it, I'm pretty sure she stepped in my way on purpose as we wouldn't have walked into one another if she'd kept in a straight line. You know what gangs of teenagers are like for being overconfident little shits. She did swear at me first, but perhaps calling her a cunt was a bit too far.
|>>|| No. 423818
I'm watching Mike Jeavons doing "a week on food beginning with A", he's having alphabetti spaghetti on aubergine. It really feels like I'm watching a documentary about a man who's suffered severe brain damage.
|>>|| No. 423819
Lindsay Ellis annoys me but I'm gradually building a massive crush on her.
|>>|| No. 423822
Christ, is she still going?
She always reminded me of a girlfriend one of my colleagues had, she would often try to correct people when they were making obviously sarcastic or irreverent jokes, like "ooh it's boiling out there!" on a very cold day, she'd say "wtf no it isn't, it's snowing" and seem really angry about it.
Maybe she was joking too, but I doubt it, she was american.
|>>|| No. 423824
She's changed a great deal from the Nostalgia Chick days, and for the better. Frankly her hard drinking and forthright attitude would seemingly make her just the kind of girl .gs would fawn* over. Check out her Hobbit documentary, it's great stuff.
*"Fawn" in this context meaning wank.
|>>|| No. 423825
Of the various YouTube media reviewers/analysts, she's definitely one of the better ones. There is the thing of the fact she's managed to ditch the smell of the Nostalgia Critic, but the dumb shit she got roped into is still around.
|>>|| No. 423841
I managed to get both HBomberguy and Shaun_Jen to respond separately to the question "would you rather have no hands or a permanent tattoo of a baby on your face?".
That's my goal for this weekend complete.
|>>|| No. 423845
I moved into a rented property last June, and when I moved in noticed that the stained glass window in the front door has a smashed panel that's held up with sticky back plastic. The panel is only about 10 cm x 5 cm, but I've noticed now it's wintry that it's letting a lot of heat escape. I notified the property managers to the problem the day I moved in, my partner emailed them after about two months to ask for it to be sorted, and I rang them three weeks ago and was told that a glazier would be in touch. But three weeks later, not heard from any glazier. I emailed about two weeks ago to follow it up, and was told the glazier was busy but to bear with them. How long is acceptable to bear with them for? It's coming up to 7 or 8 months since the problem was identified and it's still no closer to being resolved.
|>>|| No. 423846
You can get clear window film for insulation which is good in these situations - its like quite strong cling film - it is sticky at the edges, you glue it around the edge of the windows, to form like a second layer or pane, and then apply heat (from a hair dryer) which causes it to shrink slightly, and takes all the wrinkles out. Looks a lot better than it might sound, and does exactly the job you need of blocking up a leaky old window frame. I was in exactly the situation you describe, and it worked great.
Sage for /uhu/.
|>>|| No. 423848
It got better suddenly.
I woke up today feeling well rested. Haven't felt that way for a long, long time. I almost want to ask what's wrong.
Who are all these people?
|>>|| No. 423850
They're youtubers. If you're going to be rudely dismissive about it then at least be right.
|>>|| No. 423851
The early 30s lesbian couple in the flat next door will be having a birthday party today for one of them and they told me I should come over in the afternoon for cake and coffee.
Could be kind of a culture shock. I don't have much to do with them normally, besides a bit of small talk on the balcony now and then, but from what I know, most of their friends are also part of the gay community.
I've got other plans today, so I told them maybe I'd come over just for five minutes. Out of courtesy, and that.
|>>|| No. 423853
So, it now turns out that the serial cheater of the office was not only lying about their long-term partner and parent of their children not knowing about the gay affair, but that they most definitely have not stopped their serial cheating as seen by own eyes at the office drinks this Friday. It turns out the Partner is a friend of a colleague of my own other half who has reported back to me that the Partner DID know about the gay affair and actually asked to meet the Gay Lover a year and a half ago when the affair ended to be sure it had indeed finished. (By the way, said Gay Lover was also cheating on a pre-existing relationship to conduct said affair, and had just bought a house with THAT partner when Serial Cheater got their claws in and blew it all to smithereens.)
I have worked with Serial Cheater for a handful of years now and I swear the plotline gets better every six months.
|>>|| No. 423854
They're lesbians, not an uncontacted Amazonian tribe. They aren't going to force you to sing k.d. lang or disembowel you for disrespecting their shrine to Claire Balding.
|>>|| No. 423858
Good grief, what a tale - and an excellent diagram >>423855
Don't (ever) screw the crew. Shagging around at work always ends in tears and often ends with one/both parties having to leave.
|>>|| No. 423859
Everyone knows that the LGTBQ+ crew get paid a commission for how many people they convert - I understand that everyone in that community is given a weekly target.
I'm sure that >>423851 will enjoy the coffee and cake, but next week there'll be little notes, chasing phone calls and a lot of high pressure tactics to close the deal - they're impossible to resist.
|>>|| No. 423860
Well, this is true, but I've known quite a few LGBT people and they do somewhat have 'their own' culture. For instance, it's expected that you'll be a big fan of Ru Paul's Drag Race, Orange is the New Black, etc.
|>>|| No. 423861
Those are the sort of shows mostly watched by people who are pro-LGBT in the same way that people who watch The Big Bang Theory are totes into nerds :P
|>>|| No. 423862
Going over to the lesbians for coffee was quite interesting. I ended up staying for almost 45 minutes in spite of my other plans for today. It wasn't a Christopher Street Day celebration, but apart from the birthday girl's sister who was there with her husband and their little daughter, there really didn't seem to be that many straight people present. Nobody made a pass at me, I'm not sure if they were briefed beforehand that I'm straight or whatever. But I had one interesting conversation with one of their gay friends who told me he's a sound engineer. He mainly works as a roadie on live tours, but also occasionally does some DJing in a gay club in London.
I'm not sure I will hang out with my lesbian neighbours to a greater extent in the future, but just on a personal level they seem quite nice, and I naturally don't mind having nice neighbours living next door.
|>>|| No. 423863
>Nobody made a pass at me, I'm not sure if they were briefed beforehand that I'm straight or whatever.
This quote made my day. You're very confident.
|>>|| No. 423864
It's almost as if their sexual orientation isn't actually that important and they're just ordinary everyday people or something.
|>>|| No. 423868
In this case, it was Gay Lover who had to leave the workplace. Serial Cheater typically and successfully pursues a lot of colleagues or clients met through our work; they're currently on the newest one now (who is a decade their junior, and is also involved in an existing cohabiting relationship, true to form for SC), but there was a reprieve of about 18 months between this one after Gay Lover had to resign their post to escape from the atmosphere here, at work, where literally everyone knew what had happened.
I'll continue relaying this particular gossip only for as long as it annoys >>423855, or until the heat death of the universe.
|>>|| No. 423875
I can't stop laughing at the thought of you standing about going "Wow, they're just people. Weird."
|>>|| No. 423876
I'm sorry if I gave that impression, but me not normally having much to do with the gay community, naturally I was trying to take in the scene and think if I noticed anything different about a predominantly gay birthday party. No matter how absorbed you are in the idea of complete equality between straight and gay people, you can't help thinking it.
But no, they seemed like regular people, as you said. The soundengineerlad even said I should come to the gay club where he DJs some time, but that's not something I am particularly keen on.
|>>|| No. 423878
I don't think the otherlad was getting at you for being a homophobe or anything, I found it funny too, but more in a charmingly naive way, than that you expected the homos to be doing a satanic ritual or something.
Gay clubs are excellent nights out, I'd suggest they might be more fun for straight blokes than gay lads. A lot of straight women go to the more 'mainstream' ones, and typically gay blokes are good at spotting straight men anyway. Even if they're not, there's something to be said for being chatted up by handsome, well toned shirtless blokes, it's very good for the ego no matter how uninterested you are.
|>>|| No. 423879
> Even if they're not, there's something to be said for being chatted up by handsome, well toned shirtless blokes, it's very good for the ego no matter how uninterested you are.
I'm really not a homophobe, but the times something like that has happened, it made me just slightly uncomfortable, to be honest. I didn't feel threatened in my sexuality or anything like that, like some men appear to do, I just wished for that moment to be over and that I would be able to decline the offer politely.
|>>|| No. 423880
>I just wished for that moment to be over and that I would be able to decline the offer politely
I think that all straight men should visit a gay nightclub at least once, simply for this insight. A lot of lads suddenly develop a new degree of respect for women after a night out on Canal Street.
|>>|| No. 423881
>Gay clubs are excellent nights out, I'd suggest they might be more fun for straight blokes than gay lads.
Going to a gay venue by invitation is one thing, but you shouldn't go regularly of your own volition. They just aren't for straight people. They are for LGBT people to get away from straight people, and some in the community can get pretty annoyed about straight 'tourists'.
|>>|| No. 423882
>A lot of lads suddenly develop a new degree of respect for women after a night out on Canal Street.
I think we've talked about this enough in /emo/. Not every socially clueless attempt to chat a woman up against what should be noticeable reluctance is an act of disrespect against women. The ones that do regard women as fair game, well, that's indeed a problem. I've no sympathy with them. But my experience of many, many years is that a lot of lads simply haven't a clue how to talk to women, and how not to talk to them, and that that's just borne out of horrible ignorance rather than malice. And not every act of ignorance is always also an act of disrespecting somebody. Ideally, you should be switched on enough to realise that your ignorance can be construed as disrespect, but again, not everything is disrespect, intended or otherwise.
|>>|| No. 423883
It's not like I go every week, it's just something I've noticed when going out with my gay mates (or mixed company)
I don't know how anyone could get annoyed at me, I'm not taking notes and making sketches of the wildlife for my journals. I'm just there to get off my face like everyone else.
You seem pretty defensive considering the lad you replied to didn't even allude to the bloke chatting up a woman as being an inherently deliberate or disrespectful act. Just that most men have no idea what it's like to be hit on at all, let alone multiple times in one night, like most women get on a night out. It's certainly the biggest difference between the genders, and nothing really to do with whether men are 'good' at chatting women up or not, merely that they do (and are expected to, I think plenty of women would be equally very confused if they suddenly had to make the first move).
|>>|| No. 423884
>I think that all straight men should visit a gay nightclub at least once, simply for this insight. A lot of lads suddenly develop a new degree of respect for women after a night out on Canal Street.
What, because every gay man out there is trying to bum you? Plus, women at gay clubs are the worst.
|>>|| No. 423885
But that's sort of my point - it's not that they were malicious sexual predators, it's just that they hadn't realised that being chatted up by a bloke can be intimidating and awkward. It's one of many things that you aren't necessarily cognisant of unless you've been on the receiving end.
IME straight people are generally welcome as long as they don't act like tourists. A hen night or stag do can get fucked, because they'll undoubtedly treat the place like a human zoo; a small mixed-gender group that looks lively but respectable will probably get past the bouncers unless it's a very cruisey club or a fetish night.
From a purely commercial point of view, gay venues are really struggling at the moment. Rent and rates are up, people have less money to spend and Grindr has kneecapped the regular trade. A good mixed crowd is far better than no crowd at all. Straight people aren't stealing something when they go to a gay venue, they're helping to keep the lights on.
|>>|| No. 423886
>It's one of many things that you aren't necessarily cognisant of unless you've been on the receiving end.
Too true. Even as a bi guy who very definitely is interested in having sex with (some) men at (some) times I remember experiencing a lightning-bulb moment at a party when I realised a guy who knew for certain I wasn't interested in having anything to do with him was making half-hourly checks to see if I was quite wasted enough to go to bed with him. A lot of fisherpersons say it's sexist to see it through it through this lens and they probably have a point but I remember thinking "This is what my mum and sister probably have to deal with at every party. This could have been how my mum and dad got together and nobody would have said a word."
|>>|| No. 423888
A lot of straight people do weirdly think that though. Even the most unattractive of men think they're about to be bummed into madness the minute they step into a gay club.
|>>|| No. 423890
It's probably because blokes know how depressingly low our standards can get, gay or not. Ref: the lad on here who would probably shag his own mother if we posted a picture of her here.
|>>|| No. 423891
There are at least two of us who post "she'd get it" in response to every picture of a woman. I think that most men are only ever six pints and/or a six month dry spell away from having basically zero standards.
|>>|| No. 423892
I'm now picturing a gay version of Britfa.gs where people are posting comments like "He could read my news at 10, IYKWIM" under a picture of Huw Edwards.
|>>|| No. 423893
Precisely my point.
my missus is on holiday right now, how quick can you get up the A1?
|>>|| No. 423895
Really, that cliché still exists?
I think there's still nothing wrong with thinking "WOULD" at the sight of a woman you find attractive. It just generally means you have a functioning sex drive. Women are hardly better, they decide within the first 30 seconds if a lad will ever, until the end of time itself, get to shag them or not. So it's disingenuous to point at men, straight ones in particular, and say that we are slaves to our testicles. Women are just as quick, and deliberate, in deciding who has a chance at depositing the contents of his testicles inside them.
>I'm now picturing a gay version of Britfa.gs
|>>|| No. 423896
I think he would give a lovely Welsh running commentary on what he was doing to you a well. Filth.
|>>|| No. 423897
>you have a functioning sex drive
Agreed - but the situation we're talking about is basically inverted. A lot of straight men think they are going to enter a gay club and have people literally throwing themselves at them - I doubt the same men get anything like that reaction in a straight club, ever. Is it arrogance, delusion or something else? Maybe they want that to happen.
|>>|| No. 423945
I went to a gay club once, not deliberately, but I was with my girlfriend and her best friend that night and after a few drinks one of them said, how about we go and have a look inside that gay club across the street for a few minutes, just to see what it was like. So we went in, and I have to say I did get a few looks from gay lads obviously checking me out, but it was not really all that different from going to a straight/mixed club or bar and women eyeing a guy who walks in. Maybe the gay lads were just a little more overt about it than women can tend to be. And one or two lads gave us a look of derision as we were obviously tourists to them.
We ended up staying some twenty minutes. The music was some sort of Eurodance techno, I suppose that style of music is popular with many gays. Some grinding on the dance floor, and honestly a disturbing number of impeccably toned lads dancing topless. My girlfriend was completely in awe at the sight of them and told me afterwards that she had never seen so many fit blokes all in one place.
Going to that club was an... erm... educational experience, but I don't feel compelled to repeat it.
|>>|| No. 423946
>honestly a disturbing number of impeccably toned lads dancing topless.
Last time I went to a gay club most of the topless dancers were men with huge bellies.
|>>|| No. 423947
Looks like I've caught a cold. It started last night with swollen tonsils and a slightly stuffy nose and now I am nearly bedridden.
I called in sick this morning, and my boss said "Hm... I'm sorry to hear that", but with a distinct tone of "How can you get sick right now?". Big workload at the office at the moment, but I would obviously not be of much use to them in my current state. I've agreed to look over some Excel sheets that they have just e-mailed me, but looking at them now, I don't think they should rely on me to make a judgement about those spreadsheets today.
|>>|| No. 423952
My neighbours house overlooks the street's car park and as I was getting out I saw him watching porn on his telly, an Aiden Starr video, quite an old one as it was in 4:3.
Probably should tell him he forgot to close his blinds, but I won't.
|>>|| No. 423953
Properly snowing up north now, to the extent that the more rural hospitals are looking for 4x4 drivers to volunteer to ferry staff to work. In my experience most 4x4 drivers have trouble staying on the road even in the summer, but never mind. Maybe it's time to pull the Landy out of mothballs.
|>>|| No. 423956
I'm right in the middle of the South where it has all dumped today - decent six to eight inches, nothing moving on the roads. I took the car out this afternoon and saw so many people driving badly, spinning wheels and sliding all over the place. Just pull away in 2nd you fuckwits, or even better pull over to the side of the road and walk if you don't know how; it makes me so angry to see people driving like a cunt in the snow and ice when they're just not up to it.
|>>|| No. 423957
>it makes me so angry to see people driving like a cunt in the snow and ice when they're just not up to it
Agreed. I saw two people drift perilously far into roundabouts this evening. I have a notoriously heavy foot when it comes to both braking and accelerating but even I'm sensible enough to override my instincts when it's like this.
Most of the people I see driving like morons in this weather are in new, expensive cars that you really, really have to push to lose control in, yet they manage it with ease. How fucking awful must you be at driving to get an Audi Q5 Quattro to slide?
|>>|| No. 423958
If you're used to driving big, stable cars with bucketloads of grip, you can get incredibly complacent. 99.9% of the time, you can drive like an absolute cock and get away with it. When that 0.1% happens and the ESP loses it on a patch of ice, you have no idea what to do. For a lot of those drivers, that tricky roundabout might be the first time they've ever spun a wheel.
If I had my way, I'd make everyone spend a year in a Citroen AX.
|>>|| No. 423959
You make a good point.
I agree with you. I spent two winters in a mk1 MX-5, I learned a lot about driving and also got to confront my own mortality daily. It was very good for me, I miss that car. RWD in the snow is something else.
|>>|| No. 423960
I can see nine shed roofs from my back window. All of them except two are under a couple of centimetres of snow.
I know why one is, I put a radiator in there on a thermostat set to five degrees to keep some things from freezing. It's still frosted though.
The other one I can see has no ice or snow on it whatsoever. I don't know what they've got in there but it's putting out a lot of heat. I'm guessing it's just a bad fridge but I like to imagine it's a grow up.
|>>|| No. 423961
The Friday before last we were meant to get a new boiler fitted through some government scheme but the contractor has managed to completely bodge it; we had to spend last weekend with no heating, he didn't turn up a few times when he said he would (presumably because he's self-employed so was going to jobs he'd get paid for instead) and when he did finally turn up again he wasn't able to fully finish the job.
We complained to the company after that; they said they thought the job was finished and asked what his conduct had been like as they've had complaints about him before, so we mentioned about the fact he'd been quite racist whilst he was here and had made a number of other inappropriate remarks. They said they were going to suspend him before investigating him for gross misconduct, most likely sacking him off as a contractor, and that they'd tell him not to come around this morning to finish the job like he said he would because they'd do it again from scratch next week.
Anyway, he turned up this morning. He seemed quite broken when I spoke with him and he wasn't confrontational or anything like that. However, my girlfriend is absolutely having kittens. She wants to ring the police because she's convinced he knows we reported him and because he knows where we live he's going to burn the house down or something like that. I'm kind of wishing he would, to shut her up.
|>>|| No. 423962
I'm not sure if I'm on the spectrum of becoming a bit of a minimalist (or maybe this is finally just growing up?), but my life is improving exponentially through the littlest things.
I tidy my room and my living spaces instantly, whenever there's mess, little things I'd usually see as not hugely damaging, I just clean and do. Fold clothes, put them away, everything neatly in order, wipe sides, hoover regularly, wipe the window panes for dust. Everything has a neat little place and as a result I sleep better and feel less stressed, as I never get home to a messy room, it's so relaxing too knowing there's no big mess waiting for me because I've kept on top of it. Same with washing up plates, dishes, pots and pans.
I've also started just eating better. Throwing in leafy greens, swapping chocolate for a piece of fruit, watching sugar intake (there's a fuckload of sugar in everything and it's scary when I realise how much I had) and I feel a million times better.
Who knew just staying on top of stuff would bring such a positive outlook on my life? Turns out if you just do the little tasks you stop caring about the big ones because they're not even hard.
Nice to have a weekend where there's no room to tidy, ironing to do and the like because I already did it between tasks in the week.
|>>|| No. 423963
>Who knew just staying on top of stuff would bring such a positive outlook on my life? Turns out if you just do the little tasks you stop caring about the big ones because they're not even hard.
I think that was touched upon in >>418566.
|>>|| No. 423965
Thanks lad, knew I'd seen a similar thread elsewhere.
I've not, but I know the memes and on the whole tidy your room thing, he's absolutely right. Did get a laugh out of your picture though.
|>>|| No. 423966
I played at an open mic night last summer and there was this one song played that's been irking me ever since.
I didn't particularly like the song but it was catchy and I was jealous that people were singing along with the guy playing it. He was one of those "obnoxiously charming" people that annoys you with his confidence, easy-going manner, and success with the ladies but you begrudgingly like because they buy you a drink and invite you to sit at the performer's table. To be able to write catchy songs on top of all that is just too much success for one man to possess, and it's been a source of annoyance whenever that chorus popped into my head. "what you waiting for, what you waiting for, what you waiting for..."
I was in the supermarket today and I heard the fucking song over the radio. Turns out it was a wildly popular hit a few years ago and obviously wasn't written by the open mic night guy.
The people in the vegetable aisle must've thought I was a loony as I smiled and shaked my head while picking out garlic.
|>>|| No. 423967
I'm very surprised it took you that long to hear it. I'm a hermit and don't even own a television yet I hear it all the fucking time.
For what it's worth, George Ezra himself definitely is one of those obnoxiously charming cunts you describe, and some other lad at some other open mic night had the same experience as you when he started playing it, I guarantee that.
|>>|| No. 423968
I thought he'd meant Gwen Stefani. Oh well.
I'm presently sure George Ezra is the lovechild of Edd from Wheeler Dealers.
|>>|| No. 423969
Kate Silverton's choice of outfit for the News at Ten is really messing with my head. You'd have thought something that garish would be banned.
|>>|| No. 423985
Split between on which American institution to watch; Netflix's The Ted Bundy Tapes or the Super Bowl. Either way I don't think I'll be best pleased with what I'm seeing.
|>>|| No. 423986
3 hours without some kind of disgusting comment about wanting to go to bed with one of Ted's victims? A new record for this place.
|>>|| No. 423989
The neighbour lass that always talks to me has started to come out to have a smoke when I come home (her garden overlooks the parking), even at half two at night. She does flirt but I don't think she's daft enough to be making a serious play for someone who's clearly living with his long term girlfriend. She must just be lonely or something, I think most of her friends are overseas as she lived and worked in Qatar for ages. Saying that she doesn't seem to talk to my missus or anyone else.
Yes, she's fit.
|>>|| No. 423990
Chris Rock made the closest to the bone comment I've ever heard about women at a live show he taped about 15 years ago and it goes something like:
>When a guy sees someone with a nice GF he'll think "I need to find a girl like that", but women think "I want him."
And at the time I still believed in the sisterhood and thought he was being a comedy whale poacher, but now I realise how true it is. There is every chance she wants to fuck you, her being lonely may or may not be irrelevant, but the fact you have a missus is very relevant. You're immediately more desirable. I've had men poached and poached them myself. It's viscious cycle and men are the only ones who can stop it. If you fucked her, she'd might cling and if she got you in the end she would almost definitely never trust you. Stay clear.
|>>|| No. 423991
I hear you, and I'm not entirely naive to the machinations of women, though even if she does want to fuck me, she must realise that even as a practical exercise it'd be difficult to play away with the bloke who lives two doors down in the cul-de-sac. People notice in this street if the postman is late, let alone if the neighbours are shagging.
Of course if she's that bored, a bit of drama might be what she's looking for anyway, I've certainly seen that one before.
Anyway I'll have to stop washing my car in slow motion with my shirt off while drinking a diet coke in full view of her window now, I suppose.
|>>|| No. 423993
>When a guy sees someone with a nice GF he'll think "I need to find a girl like that", but women think "I want him."
It's that whole thing about women biologically investing more when creating offspring than men. A lad can afford to say "I would love to be with somebody like that someday", because in the end all he invests in his kids - up to a certain point - is his spunk. But a woman can't afford to hang around and wait until somebody "LIKE" that bloke she has set her sights on comes along again.
There is also a peer effect with these things. A lad who is already with a woman has been "tried and tested" by that woman to be husband and/or dad material. Which is something that can't be said about just a random guy who comes along and who seems nice but really hasn't proved himself in any way.
There have been psychological experiments where women were shown pictures of men surrounded by other women who were visibly admiring him, and the majority of women tested said that the men in those pictures appeared attractive to them as well. Whereas the other way round, when men were shown pictures of a woman surrounded by male admirers, they usually judged that woman's attractiveness to be only moderate, even when she was quite physically attractive.
|>>|| No. 423994
>It's that whole thing about women biologically investing more when creating offspring than men.
Does that still hold water when the lass is on birth control, though?
|>>|| No. 423995
I think women are less prone to sowing wild oats on the pill than without it. By and large though, it doesn't seem to affect that kind of thinking in women in general.
Also, some women turn into filthy deviants when they stop taking the pill, e.g. when switching to an IUD. Something about the hormones in the pill suppressing a woman's natural trace-level testosterone, which then often comes back with a vengeance when they get off the pill.
|>>|| No. 423996
It depends on the woman, but some of them are insanely competitive regardless. Most of my friends are female and some of the one-upmanship and competing over whatever they've assigned status to is completely ridiculous.
A man flirted with you? I'll have three men flirt with me!
|>>|| No. 423997
If you've ever seen a game of women's football, you will know just how competitive women can really get. It's kind of scary to watch really, as a lad.
According to Darwin, two sexual mates finding each other is a constant dance of male competition and female selection. But that's only half the story, as women also have to compete with each other for (scarce) resources. That resource might be a man who is husband and dad material, but it can also be other things. In our modern world, it also extends to a woman's professional career and competing with other women for acknowledgement and success on the job, but also such things as securing a good school for your kids.
I think male rivalry tends to be a lot more level headed and in respect of hierarchical orders that must be observed in order to climb to a position of power yourself. Women seem to be much more prepared to fight to the death over certain things and to attack existing pecking orders for personal gain and outdo female competitors.
|>>|| No. 423998
I want to find someone who's been totally deaf from birth and ask them to write some rhyming poetry.
|>>|| No. 423999
My missus is a semi-pro cyclist and I've noticed this in that world for sure. The blokes are all excellent mates, they train together, travel together, hang out together. They'll help each other set their bikes up, share parts, all that. They're competitive as soon as the starters pistol is fired, of course, but they leave it all out there on the course. If a bad enough crash happens, half the field will jump off their bikes to help. They weren't winning anyway.
The women are a different story. Constant drama, in-fighting, secrecy, and the biggest danger to a female crashed rider seems to be getting ran over by the other women. It's a bit frightening, like you say.
I think men might just be happy as long as a social order exists and is well-defined. They might all want to be the top dog, but as long as they know where they stand they seem at ease. Men are still, of course, willing to climb over bodies to succeed, but that seems to apply more to work than the rest of life. I've had very pleasant friendships with blokes despite us both gunning hard for the same position at work. There's no need to backstab when you both know the score.
Of course I'm not a woman so I might be missing some of the intricacies. But I did literally see a woman ride over another woman's arm at a Red Hook last year and I'm pretty sure it was deliberate.
|>>|| No. 424000
>Women seem to be much more prepared to fight to the death over certain things and to attack existing pecking orders for personal gain and outdo female competitors
Queen Bee Syndrome
|>>|| No. 424001
>I think male rivalry tends to be a lot more level headed and in respect of hierarchical orders that must be observed in order to climb to a position of power yourself. Women seem to be much more prepared to fight to the death over certain things and to attack existing pecking orders for personal gain and outdo female competitors.
This tends to be because the females see fewer vacancies. A man sees four senior managers, and 20 co-workers, and sees he's competing for one of four positions with 20 other people. A woman sees that only one of those senior managers is female, and sees she's competing with the 6 other women on the team for that one seat, meanwhile that one senior manager is fearing that as the "token woman" she's liable to be replaced before her time by one of those 6 women below her.
|>>|| No. 424002
I'm not sure it's all down to Sea Shepherd Conservation Society again. You tend to see the same behaviours in women-dominated work environments where there aren't many men to beat off laugh about the double entendre in your own time. And with today's equal opportunity laws, women more and more begin to reach parity in positions of power and influence in many economic sectors and industries.
What you do see when women are in positions of power is that often, they tend to rule with an iron fist more so than men. You will now say again that that's because women need to be tougher in order to not be replaced by a man and to be taken seriously by male coworkers and subordinates, but quite frankly, I consider myself an open minded, egalitarian kind of guy when it comes to men and women in the workplace, but having worked under one woman boss who was a poor man's Angela Merkel, I really much prefer working for a male boss. And coincidentally, my female coworkers at the time said the same.
Our old male boss sadly died of a heart attack aged just 54 and was replaced by a woman from outside the company. The old boss demanded all the excellent results and skill from us that we could muster, but he was willing to reach his hand out to you and meet you halfway when things weren't going right. He could tear you a new bumhole if you carelessly screwed up, but have warm words to say to you again over a pint after work. But working for the woman who replaced him was like going to a gulag every morning. Nothing escaped her attention, nobody was cut any slack, everything had to be okayed by her in minute detail and whoever questioned her authority did so at his or her own peril.
In principle, I've got nothing at all against the idea of working for a woman boss. But my own personal experience so far is that I would rather not.
|>>|| No. 424003
>I consider myself an open minded, egalitarian kind of guy when it comes to men and women in the workplace
>I really much prefer working for a male boss
|>>|| No. 424004
What I meant was that I think a woman should get to do any job she likes if she is qualified for it. She should have the same chances of reaching a position of power as anybody.
In practice though, my mileage has varied.
|>>|| No. 424006
That doesn't really explain why women in sports seem to be so much more aggressive, when they're all in female only leagues.
|>>|| No. 424007
>You tend to see the same behaviours in women-dominated work environments where there aren't many men to beat off
Well, yes. Queen bees gonna queen bee. But with more women in the workplace, their power is diluted.
>What you do see when women are in positions of power is that often, they tend to rule with an iron fist more so than men.
Nice anecdata m7.
|>>|| No. 424009
I've only had one female boss. I got on quite well with her, but most of the rest of the office hated her. She was unstable so shouting and crying wasn't uncommon; the floor below knew she was in a bad mood if they could hear her boots stomping around. A lot of the problems were her own fault because she wasn't very attentive or a great communicator. It was also noticeable when she took over recruitment that she'd go for people she thought would take her seriously and be subservient rather than on how competent they were.
However, I've worked for men who were absolute tyrants. A cunt is a cunt, regardless of what's between their legs.
|>>|| No. 424011
Really, that's what you're going with? Women are mean to other women in the workplace because of actual maritime issues, but in situations where that actual maritime issues can't exist, I'm just imagining them being mean?
|>>|| No. 424012
>However, I've worked for men who were absolute tyrants. A cunt is a cunt, regardless of what's between their legs.
That is true enough. One of my male bosses had it so bad, at some point I thought I'd either buy him an anger management session as a Christmas gift, or I would check myself into therapy. But I just ended up getting another job at a different company.
|>>|| No. 424014
I've talked about this with somebody who describes herself as a fisherperson activist and who thinks Sea Shepherd Conservation Society is always everywhere, even when you don't expect it. Even in female-dominated work environments where career opportunities are readily open to women, because according to her, these places are still few and far between and the women working there know that in the outside world, they would have to compete against men again.
Not sure I share that opinion, because it essentially absolves women from accepting responsibility for their own actions. I've also got a different female friend who has climbed the corporate ladder quite respectably, and who says she doesn't subscribe to fishing at all, and that all her career success is due to her fending for herself and having the strong and continued determination to make something of herself. She says she was never handed anything in life, and equally doesn't expect fishing to hand anything to her.
I have to say I respect her more for that than fisherpersons who always point fingers at Sea Shepherd Conservation Society.
|>>|| No. 424015
I want to go for a haircut but I just can't stop farting.
|>>|| No. 424017
I fart all the time and I suspect it's due to FODMAPs. Take a look at the list FODMAP foods and see if you notice that your farting recurs after their consumption. For instance, I'm sensitive to the carbohydrates in milk, garlic and onions.
|>>|| No. 424018
>I've also got a different female friend who has climbed the corporate ladder quite respectably, and who says she doesn't subscribe to fishing at all
|>>|| No. 424019
What makes you think it can't exist? The very fact you're talking about how they "seem more aggressive" would be evidence that it exists.
|>>|| No. 424020
>The very fact you're talking about how they "seem more aggressive" would be evidence that it exists.
Would it though?
Like I said earler, you can't just always use Sea Shepherd Conservation Society to absolve women from any kind of responsibility for their own lives.
|>>|| No. 424022
>Would it though?
Erm, yes? You do tend to need to be aggressive in competitive sport regardless of your plumbing.
|>>|| No. 424024
What's so special about AX?
Just looked it up. I like the earlier version of the interior.
Possibly. You can't override generations and generations of conditioning that easy.
|>>|| No. 424025
Read more carefully. I was replying to someone who was suggesting that women being more aggressive in sport was my perception bias, my argument is that the aggression exists and is not my perception.
|>>|| No. 424026
>What's so special about AX?
660kg wet, 70mm wide tyres and a surprisingly sorted chassis. A Peugeot 205 or a MkII Golf would do the job perfectly well, but the AX is worse in all the right ways.
|>>|| No. 424027
>I was replying to someone who was suggesting that women being more aggressive in sport was my perception bias, my argument is that the aggression exists and is not my perception.
These two things are not contradictory unless you move the goalposts to retcon your original argument.
|>>|| No. 424029
Could you explain further? One of us isn't understanding the other, though I'm not sure which at this point.
For my end I don't understand how "you are experiencing perception bias" and "no I'm not, it's really happening" can't be contradictory.
|>>|| No. 424030
>women in sports seem to be so much more aggressive
is not the same as
>the aggression exists and is not my perception
|>>|| No. 424033
I really don't understand the confusion. Someone said it was just my perception bias and I said no, I think it's actually empirically happening.
Can someone else step in here and explain which one of us is being a thick cunt? I'm willing to accept it's me but I'm going to need outside help.
|>>|| No. 424034
>Can someone else step in here and explain which one of us is being a thick cunt?
Sorry, lad. I've switched off. It's not interesting enough to follow.
|>>|| No. 424038
My point is that your observation that women are (or, at least, seem to be) more aggressive than men in the same sport is mainly down to your perceiving them to be more aggressive, which is not to say that they aren't aggressive at all, but not necessarily moreso than men.
|>>|| No. 424040
Sure. Just go watch a woman's football match and tell me I'm imagining it. The more aggressive nature of the women's game was used widely as an example of why the women's game was better to watch, during the last world cup, by the very women who play and watch the sport, so maybe they're imagining it too. I don't know how much perception there is in "women run other women over and men hop of their bikes and help" - that's literally what happens, frequently. I can tell you I'm not imagining that, or maybe I'm ignoring the men being bastards because I'm a whale poacher. That seems like a weak argument, though, and one easily turned back at yourself. For what it's worth I prefer women's crit cycling because it's faster and more exciting and the field is more open (the same two or three blokes typically get podium in the men's races, not so with the women), but if that's perception bias I should probably stop supporting them and cheer on the lads instead.
I admit that we need proper studies at hand to have a proper cunt off though.
|>>|| No. 424043
I don't know what else I can do other than list all the other sports I've had experience with and observed similar results. It's about ten in total, is that enough? I've already told you that without actual scientific studies I can't give you any more, but the same goes for your argument, too. On that point, I contend that any idea you have about women having to work harder to achieve the same position is merely your own perception bias. Don't bother giving me examples, I'll just tell you that you're looking at them wrong.
|>>|| No. 424044
IT'S CUNT-OFF O'CLOCK!!!
|>>|| No. 424045
Is it that hard to ignore them? Maybe you've had a bad day and you're trying to have a cunt-off of your own, or you're just being silly, but why don't you wind your neck in and go to bed before you get any more upset?
|>>|| No. 424050
While there is plenty of evidence that women with the same qualifications still have a harder time reaching the same hierarchical positions as men, it must be stressed that a quota system, like you see it in many countries, does not necessarily help qualified women reach those positions, and does also not necessarily improve a company's overall performance.
The Norwegians, who were trailblazers of female quotas in boardrooms, have dubbed them "golden skirts", a term that describes that certain women, regardless of their qualification and aptitude, now get to move up into top executive positions simply because there aren't enough women to fill the government-mandated quota of 40 percent.
You will rightly say that old boys clubs have promoted members of their own caste into positions that they didn't deserve for centuries. And I know from own experience, as a lad mind you, how frustrating it is when you know you are 100 percent qualified for a vacancy higher up in your company but then a name is pulled out of a hat by them, of somebody who knows diddly squat about that kind of work, and he gets the job before you even get an interview.
But surely then it can't be in the interest of a company's performance when somebody gets to climb the ranks simply because she is a woman and there aren't enough woman executives to fill the quota. And also, many female executives will then have to live with the suspicion that they don't deserve to be where they are but just got lucky.
I think the answer isn't to set more or less rigid quotas. But to establish a culture of equal opportunity for equal qualification. If men shouldn't get to enjoy advantages simply because of their gender, then I don't see what makes it right for women.
|>>|| No. 424054
There are two years missing from that timeline. I can't help but think the 1991 cut-off might be carefully selected too.
|>>|| No. 424057
The 2011 winner for Best Picture was The Artist, which was a silent film. The 2002 winner was Chicago; I don't know why that's missing. In the process of removing those films, they seem to have buggered up the dates for everything else.
|>>|| No. 424060
Empirical evidence that women haven't got anything to talk about that's worth listening to!
|>>|| No. 424061
I don't really see how one film that bucks the trend (if it even does, I'm not familiar with it) would ruin the narrative. One 'woman film' out of 25 doesn't really ruin the point, does it?
|>>|| No. 424063
>The 2011 winner for Best Picture was The Artist, which was a silent film.
In other words, a film in which the men didn't have any more words than the women.
>The 2002 winner was Chicago; I don't know why that's missing.
It's more-or-less a direct transfer of the stage show, which is definitely female-heavy. Also, the 1990 winner was Driving Miss Daisy, where I assume Jessica Tandy's performance contributes heavily to the line count. I can't help but think it would have been better to include these two to show both how drastic the trend is and how it's not an impossibility to make an Oscar winner where women get decent lines.
|>>|| No. 424084
I could do with picking your brains, lads.
I interviewed someone this afternoon and she seemed lovely and that she would fit right in; the interview was around two hours long, most of it incredibly off-topic, and it could have easily gone on longer if it wasn't time to leave for the day. However, when it got to the technical aspect of the interview a number of her answers were way off. She is qualified but she has a few gaps in her knowledge from simply not doing those areas of the role in her current job and also because she's had a year off on maternity leave and when she came back she was shunted into doing something else, which is why she wants to leave, so she's a little rusty. She isn't on a right lot at the minute, either.
The issue is that I have a terrible habit of wanting to see the best in people when they're not up to scratch.
|>>|| No. 424085
Can you trust yourself to get rid during a probation period?
Interview is never enough to be sure on, imho.
|>>|| No. 424086
Everyone has gaps in their knowledge. You can hardly fault someone for not having experience that their current employer doesn't offer. Admittedly, when I'm missing something because of this, it's typically part of the reason I'm leaving my employer.
How confident are you that she'd be able to fill her gaps stop giggling at the back in a timely fashion? Are there any regulatory issues that would make that a definite no?
|>>|| No. 424087
If you think she might be the best candidate, bring her back in for a practical work test. Take a real task that will require technical skills and work through it with her. Look at her skills, but also look at how she copes with mistakes. That should give you a better idea of whether she's just rusty or a clueless blagger. The key thing to look for is how quickly she picks things up - you can get a fast learner up to speed fairly painlessly, even if they've got big gaps in their knowledge base.
|>>|| No. 424088
Yes. Interviews aren't enough but we throw enough technical questions at them to be able to weed out the chancers and rank incompetents. This one seems like extenuating circumstances.
I don't make the job offer. There is a second interview with my boss where he sizes them up, but this is usually him signing off on whomever I've put in front of him; I've only ever known him not offer a job to one person he's interviewed and that's across the entire company rather than just my team.
I think a crash course could get her up to speed on the most glaring ones, which I could do with running for some of our trainees anyway. She sounds like she has the right mindset about learning things she doesn't know.
What she does have in her favour is that she seems to have good practical experience in dealing with the people management aspect of the job rather than just having the know how.
>the best candidate
We're not actively looking at the moment; this was a speculative CV. We have plans to start looking for a couple of people later on in the year but past experience has shown this to be a mixed bag based entirely on who happens to be looking for a job at the time; the quality of candidates can vary significantly.
Based on her CV on paper, she's presently on around £10k less, possibly even £15k, than she could get elsewhere and I don't think she realises this.
|>>|| No. 424089
>Based on her CV on paper, she's presently on around £10k less, possibly even £15k, than she could get elsewhere and I don't think she realises this.
I'm a generous recruiter but this is all starting to sound a little off to me. Technical questions are there precisely to stop people charming themselves into a job and by your own admission she's been very charming.
As you're not the final boss in this I suggest letting her through all the same but making a note. You may well have a diamond in the rough but there's risk involved.
|>>|| No. 424090
Technical questions also have a nasty habit of filtering out people who are really good at what they do, but who perform badly under interview conditions. If you Google "technical interview", you'll find all sorts of advice, books and even coaching services on how to seem competent in an interview. Writing interview questions that really assess on-the-job competence is much harder than most people think, which is why I recommend a practical assessment based on a real work task.
|>>|| No. 424091
That rather depends on the questions. I've been in too many interviews where the "technical" questions were little more than a trivia quiz. If your test is whether people happen to know definitions they can find on Google, you're doing it wrong. A good technical question is one that doesn't depend on "gotchas", and focuses on application over knowledge.
|>>|| No. 424092
Eh, the way I normally do it is I ask them to do a presentation on a particular task. Yeah, there is a fair chance they can just google but then again if they're doing self-research to arrive at the right answers then that isn't such an issue compared to the genuinely competent who crack under pressure.
This is a two stream process. If you can give all the answers without people skills or if you have the people skills but no idea then you equally have a problem.
|>>|| No. 424093
>Technical questions also have a nasty habit of filtering out people who are really good at what they do, but who perform badly under interview conditions.
I think it still depends on the kind of position that they apply for. For a service engineer who spends every day visiting customers to fix problems that they have with your company's products, you need somebody who has very good people skills. But if you are looking for a boffin in a lab somewhere who really just runs test sequences all day and doesn't deal with more than the same four people during a typical workday, I would say a lack of social skills is forgiven if they display firm and relevant technical knowledge during the interview.
That said, the dad of one of my friends was a service engineer for a manufacturer of printing presses, whose job it was to coordinate and oversee troubleshooting and regular maintenance of printing presses that their customers had bought. And on a personal level, I can only say he was quite an arsehole. He had dismal people skills, something that my friend always admitted quite freely. Which makes it seem like kind of a mystery how he was able to more or less hold the same position at his company for over 30 years until he retired.
|>>|| No. 424095
>hold the same position at his company for over 30 years until he retired
I think this is the answer to your question. Those jobs don't really exist any more in the modern workplace. Somebody staying in the same position for years on end would be a red flag to most employers.
|>>|| No. 424096
I wouldn't say doing the same job for 30 years was a career dead end back then. If you were good at what you were doing and were a valued employee of your company, then it was no oddity at all to have been the senior/lead service engineer for many years.
Also though, when I said that he was doing the same job for 30 years, what I meant by "more or less the same position" was that he was in that same line of work during that time. When I first met my friend, he said his dad was the regional lead service engineer for their company. But presumably, he will have climbed up the ranks when he first started at the company, and will have ended up being the regional lead service engineer only after a few years on the job.
>Somebody staying in the same position for years on end would be a red flag to most employers.
If it's an entry-level shit job, then yes, you are probably right. But companies also still value long standing on the job experience in your field. Somebody who has been working a senior position for ten years and during that time has more or less been doing the same things, new developments in that industry notwithstanding, then you've got somebody who knows all the ins and outs of it and can be a valuable asset for a new employer by virtue of his wealth of practical experience.
Employers invariably like to find a hair in the soup during an interview. They know that somebody who was a lead service engineer for ten to fifteen years comes with a considerable price tag attached to him, and while they will probably take great interest in you, they also don't want to pay that kind of salary. So your advantage of many years of experience suddenly becomes a negative and you are accused of never having evolved as an employee.
Having your cake and eating it, and all that.
|>>|| No. 424097
I cleaned out my shed today. Mostly it was just stuff the previous tenants left behind and I thought might come in useful one day, but it hasn't so I just chucked it. Filled up two 240L wheelie bins with junk and one with recycling.
It's a good feeling.
There looks to be some sort of fluffy white mycelium coming in one corner where damp's coming in under some old wallpaper/plastic I've since removed. Will it die on its own now I've exposed it to the air or should I spray it down with something?
|>>|| No. 424098
>Will it die on its own now I've exposed it to the air or should I spray it down with something?
I would treat it with chlorine bleach, because even if you let it dry out now, that does not mean that the mycelium will die. Mycelium can normally tolerate drought for a long time and will then spring back to life the next time it gets damp.
Sodium hypochlorite is very effective against fungi, it should manage to kill off all of it. Afterwards though, you are going to have to air out the shed thoroughly, because the gases that form when the bleach evaporates are quite seriously harmful to a person, especially in a confined space like a garden shed.
The best way to do it is probably to spray it on first, and then after ten minutes or so clean the area with a moist sponge and warm water.
|>>|| No. 424100
I was thinking of chucking down some salt to help it dry out. Found some fungicide spray in a cupboard so I'll go at it with that then let the shed air. Cheers.
|>>|| No. 424101
>I was thinking of chucking down some salt to help it dry out.
You would probably be better off achieving that with a blow dryer.
But do use the fungicide, or indeed chlorine bleach. If you don't mind the inside of your shed smelling like a swimming pool for a few months.
|>>|| No. 424103
I've been selling my car 'collection' off and if the chap who's coming round tomorrow buys the Range Rover, I'll be down to one road legal car, a Micra I bought off my grandad's mate when I was 18.
Despite the Range being the most expensive one, I have no attachment to it and will be glad to see it gone. The cheaper but more interesting cars I've said goodbye to were far more painful. They're cars I either brought back from the dead, saved from scrapyards, or were otherwise fun and interesting classics that I'm glad I got to experience, and I'm glad I kept alive for someone else to experience, but it's still a bit sad to let them go. I've held on to a couple of projects but the majority have gone.
The plan is to use all the money (and the savings from driving a Micra around instead of running a Range rover and 6 different bangers) to order a GT-R in cash. It still won't happen for months maybe a year, most likely, but I can't fucking wait.
|>>|| No. 424104
>I have a hot air gun somewhere, I might get that out.
And we will keep following the irrelevant news thread in /news/ for a story about a shed owner setting his shed on fire.
|>>|| No. 424105
Any shed owner who hasn't set fire to their shed at least once isn't doing it properly.
Side question: As someone living in a rented 1-bed apartment in a tower block, how do I get myself a shed? I'm told that on allotments you're expected to use the patch for growing things, which I don't really want to get involved in. Were I in a 2-bed, I'd just I'd use the spare room as a workshop, but around here that adds around £400 a month to the rent.
|>>|| No. 424107
You could still have your kitchen double as a workshop. There is fundamentally no huge difference between using your kitchen counter to cut leek and onions, or to drill a hole in a piece of wood.
You'll only get away with that sort of thing as a bachelor, mind. When I still lived with my ex, I once committed the crime of leaving a quart of engine oil on the kitchen counter over night, right next to the jars with cooking spices. I was not hearing the end of it the next day.
|>>|| No. 424109
K11. The K10s were a bit before my time, sadly.
The K11 was practically a Bentley compared to the base model Saxos and Corsas my mates were getting around the same time - I was certainly the only teenager I knew whose car had electric windows, 'sport' suspension (read: too stiff) AND parking sensors. Incredible luxury.
It's still fun to chuck around, now.
|>>|| No. 424110
If property prices are expensive in your area, it's going to be expensive no matter how you slice it. A lock-up garage or a storage unit is probably your best option if you need a private space.
If you just need somewhere to work on small projects, I'd suggest looking up hackspaces or men's sheds in your area. You don't have the luxury of lots of storage space, but they're usually equipped with a decent selection of power tools and many hackspaces also have CNC equipment.
|>>|| No. 424113
>Police release images of £6k fishing gear stolen from Swindon shed
That's a lot of fishing gear. I'm an avid angler myself and own a whole assortment of rods, reels, and various other fishing tools and implements, but even if I had to buy all of it new again, it would cost me no more than about £1,500. And even that would be pushing it.
Then again, when you start out with the hobby of fishing, you have no idea that before long, you will end up owning half a dozen different rods, each one for a particular purpose. But you come to realise the value of having separate rods for trout fishing (not a word filter!) and surfcasting. So somebody splashing out on £6K worth of equipment certainly shows commitment to the hobby, but I can see how it creeps up on you, one new rod and reel at a time.
|>>|| No. 424114
> men's sheds in your area.
I want to see someone with talent make this into a faux pop-up ad.
|>>|| No. 424115
I don't know how we manage to have an expert on every feasible subject or hobby posting here, but I love that we do.
|>>|| No. 424116
I'm not sure if we do, beyond cars, computing and fishing.
Actually, have we got a resident wood turner?
|>>|| No. 424117
I have a friend whose dad is really into wood turning. Maybe I can get him to start posting on here.
|>>|| No. 424119
We also have cheflad, electrical engineering lad, a bloke on here told me a load about boats once, there's a couple of musicians/music tech types, there's at least two HAM lads, I'm pretty sure we had an astrophotographer at one point, and I'm pretty good at remembering britfa.gs posts, I suppose.
|>>|| No. 424120
His posts are always fun, he is one of the most fun to talk to people on here.
|>>|| No. 424121
For what it's worth, I might be documenting my vegetable and possibly bonsai growing adventures here this year.
I've got no decent south facing windows here though, so currently looking at getting a 40w-ish LED growlight for propagating, and maybe a slightly more powerful one for growing chillis in the spare room.
|>>|| No. 424122
Don't we have two cheflads? I'm sure there's one who shagged his manager and one who hasn't.
|>>|| No. 424123
>bonsai growing adventures
I thought the whole point of bonsai trees was that they don't grow?
|>>|| No. 424125
Gutted that I'm not even one of the cool kids.
Investment bankers are
posters people here too you know. Maybe I've been hiding my light under a bushel for too long.
|>>|| No. 424126
Honestly I was going to post about getting solid financial advice from here, but I wasn't sure how to word it without sounding glib.
|>>|| No. 424129
I think that would be a bad idea. Secretly I think at least half of us are women and the other half would be completely ruined by that idea. We're living in a matriarchal society, but that doesn't fit the prevailing narrative.
|>>|| No. 424133
I'm the others, I also wrote evey post in this thread that wasn't you 2 and that one other guy.
|>>|| No. 424134
We do have two, or did have.
I'm the manager shagging one, I can't believe that's still remembered. That must have been six or seven years ago.
|>>|| No. 424135
That's usually me, I'm a chartered financial planner. Don't trust the investment banker; he's a crook and should be too busy off his tits on coke to post here if he was doing his job properly.
Yep. If I remember correctly it was either on top of a desk or kitchen appliance. I can recall things here that happened 9/10 years ago clearly but not things that happened 9/10 days ago, although everything blurs into one. Time is meaningless here.
|>>|| No. 424136
Doesn't have to include gender, just jobs/professions.
Then we can guess which engineers are female and which nurses are male.
|>>|| No. 424137
Lets keep it that way. If people want to talk about their jobs and interests that is fine, but seeing as we've had several self confessed LARPers over the years it'll probably skew heavily towards Astronaut.
|>>|| No. 424145
I have a theory that eight or nine years ago many posters lied about their jobs being more impressive than they were because they were young and aspiring, but now are playing down how impressive their jobs actually are because they're older and don't want to seem like they're boasting/making it up, or are in too specific a job to mention explicitly lest they are immediately googled.
Why would I say that? I dunno. I'm just some bloke
|>>|| No. 424146
Fucks sake, /x/ lad, I didn't even get a proper look at them - why delete? I was almost certainly going to do a detailed review.
|>>|| No. 424152
> or are in too specific a job to mention explicitly lest they are immediately googled.
It can be a balancing act between being specific about your line of work and becoming googleable.
Is "googleable" a word?
For the most part though, I doubt you will be able to google somebody based on them specifically posting here that they are something like a foreign commodities manager for an investment bank, just to pull a job description out of thin air here. I think people are often far too paranoid about these things. If you post your whole CV here or vital parts of it, then yes, somebody with too much time on their hands could make the effort to cross check it against LinkedIn profiles. But why would you do that.
|>>|| No. 424153
>But why would you do that.
>too much time on their hands
I don't know if you've noticed, but there are some nutters on the internet, many of whom seem to have an abundance of free time and remarkable investigative skills. There's no great harm in concealing some essential details, just in case one of the mods goes full Emily.
|>>|| No. 424154
Honestly, I misplaced an apostrophe and was appalled at myself and had to go for a walk.
|>>|| No. 424155
I know what you're saying, and you're probably right. I'm often conscious of people linking my posts together, I've talked about the industry I'm in, mentioned specific companies, and I've also talked about the stuff I like and the town I grew up in and the cars I drive etc. Not all in the same post, but someone with an eye for writing styles could feasibly work it out. This is the exact reason I don't post this shit with a username on some other forum, but because of the freedom we have here it always plays on my mind.
I do know what you're saying, though I confess I don't know how many foreign commodities managers for investment banks there are knocking about, I assume it's a number big enough to make it hard to figure you out. But my old job title was development chef for a UK restaurant group - there's only about 30 of those in the country. I'm not really saying I'm paranoid that someone could google me, more just aware I've probably made it easier than I would like. I don't want to end up as piemaster 2.0, there are a lot of embarrassing pictures of me proudly stood next to plates of pasta and that floating around out there, despite my protestations.
I've said too much.
|>>|| No. 424156
> but there are some nutters on the internet, many of whom seem to have an abundance of free time and remarkable investigative skills.
True, there are always cunts like that. It's like it's a trophy hunt for them, the prize being that they will have exposed somebody's identity. And for what.
It's indeed one reason why you should always maintain a healthy dose of vagueness with the things you divulge online about yourself, or change details when you feel that those details could otherwise identify you.
Personally, beyond my participation in web forums dealing with a wide range of hobbies, interests and pursuits, I try not to leave any kind of data trail at all. I've got no facebook profile, no youtube channel, I don't even have a LinkedIn profile, and I'm not on twitter, Instagram or Tinder either. Both my mobile and landline phones are ex-directory and have been for over ten years.
One of my mates jokingly said to me the other day that it's as if I'm in a witness protection programme. He then paused for a second and I couldn't quite tell if he was being serious when he raised his eyebrows and said, "You're really not, are you?".
|>>|| No. 424157
I recently got someone's CV, he'd sent it to a hacking group mailing list to have people check it over from him. Obviously he very carefully went through the document and altered or redacted anything personally identifiable, just going by his online handle. So far, so sensible. Only, he'd sent it from his university email address, which meant both his anonymous and real facebook accounts could be linked together, as well as finding anything else you'd care to look for.
Probably just don't post your CV around anywhere.
|>>|| No. 424158
The only things I ever post about under my own name are to do with my work, where anyone else bothering to look will likely know who I am anyway, or at the very least be wanting to hire me. It wasn't a deliberate decision, I just never thought there was any point in hiding my name while talking on an industry-specific forum or posting pictures of easily identifiable and unique work - and the industry is insular as fuck anyway.
Anyone googling me essentially will find nothing but supplemental CV material. I do wonder if that just makes me look odd, but probably not.
|>>|| No. 424159
What ever happened with that lad who got himself a skips worth of out of date mash from the nut-house anyway? And that lass who was escorting and offered us a discount?
|>>|| No. 424163
I believe the instant mash was very, very short dated.
I bet he was shot and killed in a mash deal that went horribly wrong.
|>>|| No. 424164
I'd like to know about both of those things, too.
I felt like I gave mashlad a pretty solid business plan, involving a trendy mash stall. I also think I asked about the discount for the escortlass. I could probably swing full price these days. It'd be fun to shag someone from here, I think, though I'm not sure why I think that.
|>>|| No. 424165
We have at least one schizophrenic lad who used to pester green and stalk a female IRC user. It's not a good idea.
|>>|| No. 424166
>We have at least one schizophrenic lad
Shouldn't he count double then?
I'll get my coat.
|>>|| No. 424168
That one then. Let's get us a few multiplepersonalitylads and -lasses, and we'll rightfully be able to say that we are frequented by fifty different posters.
|>>|| No. 424169
How do you know that Purps and I aren't just your alters and the Sentry isn't just a cruel joke?
|>>|| No. 424172
Not exactly, they just have more rigorous diagnostic criteria now so if you were expressing symptoms of multiple personalities you would be diagnosed with Schizotypal Personality Disorder and/or Disassociative Personality Disorder.
It's just an antiquated name for a condition not fully understood at the time, like Autism; formerly mental retardation.
|>>|| No. 424173
I think the misconception is that it's literally a Jekyll-and-Hyde thing. In reality, it's more like distinct different sets of personality traits between which patients with dissociative identity disorder tend to switch more or less freely and which can in that sense be understood as multiple personalities.
|>>|| No. 424174
I got an email asking me to confirm my email for a new Gumtree account. I haven't signed up for one myself, so someone else is trying to use my email, but I don't know what their end game is. What do they gain from me signing up for Gumtree?
|>>|| No. 424175
I signed up for Gumtree just this weekend, I don't think I used your email, but if I did I'm sorry I must have been terribly confused.
Also it's amazing how many people stick their exact address on their while advertising hundreds of pounds of whatever they're shifting, you can almost see it through their window on Google Maps half the time.
|>>|| No. 424180
Lads, someone just tried to use my email to sign up for YourMumTree. I don't know what their game is.
|>>|| No. 424181
I signed up for YourMumTree just this weekend, I don't think I used your email, but if I did I'm sorry I must have been terribly confused.
|>>|| No. 424184
We also have at least two guys who do "cyber" or as we prefer to call it "infosec".
We're definitely an eclectic bunch.
|>>|| No. 424185
I know a lass who documents her movements daily on Instagram stories while bopping about on the metro selling stuff that probably fell off a lorry.
She was utterly taken aback when someone finally mugged her for all the gear she was lugging from station to station to meet with customers.
No I'm really taking about things like bluetooth speakers and that, not drugs.
|>>|| No. 424187
I'm a long term doley, the kind the Mail and Sun would love to pick up as SCROUNGER TEKKIIN YOUR MONEY!
|>>|| No. 424188
Anyone who calls infosec cyber is a pretender and should be avoided at all costs. It's a modern-day bozo bit.
|>>|| No. 424189
>on the metro
British or otherwise?
Because I'd not even take my wallet on the Metro here. Someone managed to steal half a mile of overhead cables during the day a few years back.
|>>|| No. 424190
The Metro is a weird thing. On one level, it's like something from a utopian public information film from the 1960s about how people will travel in the future. On another, it's a dystopian nightmare full of pissheads and junkies. I suppose the same thing happened to tower blocks.
It also slightly annoys me that the on-board announcements are in a southern accent. It'd be so much nicer if the voice was someone's nana saying "alreet pet, yer wonna gerrof here fer Pelaw".
|>>|| No. 424191
I've got a cold, so I'm going to have the day off work. I always feel like a bit of a fraud when I'm not really ill, but if I don't recuperate I'm only going to feel more run down and I'll end up spreading my germs.
Taking paracetamol with caffeine in was a mistake.
|>>|| No. 424194
>It also slightly annoys me that the on-board announcements are in a southern accent
I remember at one point they had a thing where they'd play a celebrity saying 'stand clear of the doors please' and you'd have to guess who it was to win something - I think that was it, I was very young. And the driver used to do the stop announcements so they were inherently geordie then too.
They don't even say 'stand clear of the doors please' anymore, it just beeps at you. And it's expensive as fuck, it used to be 25p for an adult, or 50p even in my day. Now it's about a fiver to get to the airport, it's cheaper to drive. AND the new tickets look shite.
Also, the entire rolling stock has never been replaced, it's all the same trains that were built in 1978. I'm sure it's a bit of a Ship of Theseus job but it's still a good way for old grumpy cunts like me to complain that nobody cares about The North. We don't even have a proper motorway man
|>>|| No. 424196
That's a lie, whenever I go on the M1 there is a sign that says The North, so you do.
|>>|| No. 424197
It's hard to tell if you're having me on or not, such is the ignorance of southeners. The M1 stops at Leeds.
Once you get far enough north you don't even get three lanes.
|>>|| No. 424198
Wastelands of Norfolk reporting in.
Stop yer whining or we'll send a million tractors with trailers full of root vegetables up there.
I understand that we do have some dual carriageways, but they were recent upgrades. And they're not where the traaactors go. Still, unless you're a complete gimp, overtaking works fine.
|>>|| No. 424201
The weather is absolutely awful here.
It was merciful enough to stop pissing when I had to go for a bit of shopping. Well, thanks for that.
|>>|| No. 424215
Lads, I'm in a pickle.
I've got the opportunity to pork a long-lusted after ex, who lives abroad and I happen to be in the country on a family holiday. Meanwhile, back home, I'm now on the 3rd date of a girl I'm actually developing feelings christ alive for.
I've not shagged in around 3 years so this pork-and-out situation is somewhat tempting. However, I feel this is definitely within the realm of cheating, despite the lack of any real titles.
Do I do it and say nothing, or take the high road and call the thing off?
sorry for the emo, I don't feel it's worthy of a whole thread.
Happy Valentines lads.
|>>|| No. 424216
Don't do it. Always err on the side of the lass you have feelings for. People kick themselves for quite a while if they miss out on a good shag, they kick themselves for the rest of their lives if they fuck up something that might have been true love.
|>>|| No. 424219
Depends. Do you (and does she) consider yourselves a couple? A lot of people, me included, would likely assume if you were just in the dating phase that you're not exclusive yet, and might well be dating others, or indeed, banging your ex on holiday.
If this is the case then I'd say you're morally fine, but the very fact you're asking does suggest you'd end up feeling guilty about it.
|>>|| No. 424221
Let's say you end up marrying this girl. One night when you're reading in bed you say "oh, haha, funny thing I just remembered, between our third and forth dates I slept with my ex who was briefly back in the country". How would she react?
|>>|| No. 424227
I fucked a few people around the same time I met my missus and we hadn’t gotten together despite being on a couple of dates, I just told the other lasses I had met someone and they backed off because they were casual.
Judge how likely that is, then decide. Maybe even tell your ex in person after a few drinks you’ve started dating a lass and it’s nothing serious, but if it does get serious she might get upset, but that you’ve thought about hooking up for a while and you’re conflicted. Your ex will then either say “I’m not going to tell anyone.” or “Yeah, maybe best we don’t.” Either way, your ex will respect your honesty and your new bird will never need to know.
|>>|| No. 424230
I have no mental energy to do anything. I missed 70% of uni this week, missed two of my three shifts of paid work, I've got plenty of books and games to read/play in all the time I've got to myself, but have no motivation to engage with them. I guess it's because my depression has got worse again, but I just hate how I've basically spent an entire week laying awake in bed doing fuck all.
|>>|| No. 424231
I've done similar things before, and let me tell you, sex with an ex is never really, truly as good as you hope it will be. It simply doesn't live up to that ex-lust in your head- That's rose tinted and optimistic at best. If you have better options on the table, stick to knocking one out over the nudes you still have saved.
Conversely, If you're in a dry spell and she's the only one available, knock yourself out. You can have a perfect fuck buddy in an ex, where you both understand instinctively that it's borne purely out of the need to get your rocks off, and actually get on better because you don't have to live up to the idea of being partners.
But like I said, you have to remember to temper your expectations; if it's a particular part of the chemistry together you miss, it's going to have changed, if it's a particular act or dynamic, you'll find it weird and off-putting slipping back in to those old shoes. Be forewarned.
|>>|| No. 424232
I've never personally had sex with an ex, and so far it was both because the opportunity just never presented itself after the breakups that I went through, and because I believe some doors shouldn't be opened. Unless the breakup was a complete misunderstanding and both parties still care a great deal about each other, I can only say that going by what I have witnessed with a lot of my friends over the years, it is not worth it. Probably any halfway attractive seeming otherlass will turn out to be a more fulfilling shag and with less remorse afterwards than your ex. The only healthy direction in which to travel in life is forward. If you and your significant other broke up, then there is probably a good reason you did, and whatever drove you apart will almost always linger, and it will certainly not just go away by having a casual bonk together for old times sake.
I once ended up in the sack with somebody new just ten days after my then-ex dumped me. And while it was way too early for me to have any degree of emotional detachment from my ex that would have made shagging that new lass an exceedingly good idea, I ended up asking myself later, "Would you really rather go back and have sex with your ex - or instead see where things can go with this quite attractive new girl?".
|>>|| No. 424233
The kind of ex sex people normally have- The thing where you see each other a few weeks after and end up in bed... That's unhealthy.
The kind of ex sex I've had, which is where it's a year or two since you broke up and are both, for all intents and purposes, over it, that has the potential to be fine. That's where you can end up in the fuck buddy situation like I described, with the caveat that it's only really like to even happen if you simply don't have any better options.
|>>|| No. 424234
I've gone back to visit my parents for the weekend. In the past half an hour or so my Dad has already moaned about eskimos, Eastern Europeans and various other foreigners who should go back to their own country if they don't like it here.
|>>|| No. 424237
>The kind of ex sex I've had, which is where it's a year or two since you broke up and are both, for all intents and purposes, over it, that has the potential to be fine.
You still have to be in the right frame of mind about it. People can change greatly within the course of just two years, especially when they are still young.
It's like that Thomas Wolfe novel, You Can't Go Home Again. It's unfortunately mainly 650 pages of tedium, so I'm decidedly not saying go and read it to get the point, but its bottom line message is solid, and it's that whatever you think you can just come home or go back to, after a time of absence, may really no longer exist at all. And there probably won't even be somebody waiting for you with open arms. At least they won't be the person you used to know.
If none of that applies to you and you really just want to have a bonk with somebody you used to date, yes, I suppose there's a good chance you won't do yourself any emotional damage. But I think it's easy to fool yourself regardless.
|>>|| No. 424239
Steady on lad. We're talking about shagging your ex, not getting back with your ex. It's pretty easy to separate the two situations when the emotional dust of whatever happened between you has settled; and if you struggle to, that should tell you that it absolutely has not and you should stay well away.
Are you the kind of lad who falls in love with every girl who noshes him off, perchance?
|>>|| No. 424240
>Are you the kind of lad who falls in love with every girl who noshes him off, perchance?
No, but I am this lad >>424224 and the generous quantity of flu medication that I have taken tonight has kind of made me a bit loopy it seems. Apologies. And self sage for crossposting.
|>>|| No. 424246
Oh god, the manflu has been everywhere this week - I have almost just recovered suffering terribly from it, as is most people at work, this week: it's bad lads, ensure all your affairs are in order, is my advice.
|>>|| No. 424248
Seconding this. I don't even know how it manages it but I'm not the only one who has suddenly found themselves unable to speak from chocking on phlegm at the exact moment you're in an important conversation.
Medical science needs to get its act together and cure this already.
|>>|| No. 424249
Shit I have to leave the house for the first time in a week, should I just fashion some sort of HAZMAT suit?
|>>|| No. 424254
> the manflu
I reject the concept of it. I'm usually a good sport about my colds and flus even when I am bedridden. I don't complain excessively about being sick, and I don't act like I am going to die. I suffer in silence and see it for what it is, i.e. a few days of unpleasantless during which you feel like shit. That's about it.
|>>|| No. 424256
Do you identify as male?
There is clearly something wrong with you. Seek professional help.
|>>|| No. 424259
>Do you identify as male?
Yes, I identify as male. I just don't subscribe to the idea that the man flu is more than somebody's imagination. Maybe thinking makes it so, but I've always been more a "get on with it" kind of person who doesn't really whine much about these things.
Cite studies to the contrary all you want, I've personally never bought into it.