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>> No. 26086 Anonymous
29th January 2018
Monday 6:43 pm
26086 ex-offender mega whinge
Before anyone accuses me of self-pity - I don't feel sorry for myself I feel sad and frustrated
It might be interesting to read
I've been released from prison having served three years. I'm now unemployable and without any friends, living in a hostel full of criminals in a city in England. There are drugs here, im a former heavy user, and there is alcohol everywhere. I'm on a drug which stops alcohol working as im trying to quit, having wasted money.
I'm so sorry for what I did but i cannot fix it and I think it's done a lot of damage. I have no friends, none, all deleted me. Little chance of ever getting a job, and struggling to find a tenancy. There were other offences, burglaries that I did and wasnt caught for; I feel like fucking this life off and grassing myself up for everything I ever did. I've got nothing else to do and it might make some victims feel better but WOULD it? They'd prefer to CATCH the bad guy not have him give himself up because h's got nothing left to live for.. although it would be unusual, heartwarming even.. I'd get another three years, would prob run concurrent with my current license period (1/2 in, 1/2 out for the sentenced offence) Long history of mental illness, got alot better in prison.. I was never able to love myself and had constant paranoia due to conspiracies I was constantly contemplating.. Now i feel like I cannot ever have what i always wanted - warmth and love - because of what i've done..
It matters less to me now, I just want probation and the police to leave me alone. Im not going into details about the offences although I worked out why they happened and it is damn complicated, psychologically.
Anyone been in the same position?
Expand all images.
>> No. 26088 Anonymous
30th January 2018
Tuesday 7:44 am
26088 spacer
You are just contemplating punting your problems 3 years down the road, how does that help you? When you get out again you'll be in the same position, you may as well sort it all out now.
>> No. 26093 Anonymous
30th January 2018
Tuesday 10:53 pm
26093 spacer
>>26086
>I worked out why [the offences] happened and it is damn complicated, psychologically.

Assuming you are the guy the others have supposed, would you elaborate on this? .. It seems apparent that there are similar minds lurking here and it'd surely help them if you could reveal your insight of the problem.
>> No. 26095 Anonymous
31st January 2018
Wednesday 6:27 pm
26095 spacer
You say you've lost contact with people you used to know, is there no possibility of reaching out to your nearest (former) mates? Where abouts are you based?
>> No. 26096 Anonymous
1st February 2018
Thursday 4:03 am
26096 spacer
>>26093
I've deleted the off topic, try to be civil lads and use /emo/ for its intended purpose. Stop trying to be internet detectives and be internet psychologists instead.

OP, tell us about your Mother.
>> No. 26097 Anonymous
1st February 2018
Thursday 4:49 pm
26097 spacer
>>26096
>OP, tell us about your Mother.

Perhaps he should call her on his iPhone?

(A good day to you Sir!)
>> No. 26102 Anonymous
1st February 2018
Thursday 4:57 pm
26102 spacer
OP here. The reason I made this thread was that I thought I had rare valuable testimony on what it is like to be released from prison and live in the community - Daily Mail vilification and Netmums/Loose Women horrorfear don't tell us anything about "How could you DO something like that!?" which is often the response to someone hearing an offence of a sexual nature has been committed.

I have participated in offending behaviour programmes, been employed as a cleaner, and completed a bricklaying qualification; but I find myself without hope because of essentially a Probation requirement that I not lie on job applications which ask about convictions, and a police insistence that they, independantly of me, inform potential employers about my convictions.

It seems dreadful and feels punitive - I can only liken it to being gossiped about. I have no chance of work because prior to commencing employment a copper turns up and tells the manager what i went to prison for! (Really was bad.)

Likewise I am unable to live in a share-house with a woman unless the police inform them of my conviction. Which would result in them telling the other housemates and me having no friends, and them telling all their friends and me living as a pariah - as I have my whole life anyway, having been involved in other, low-level crime and seeing myself as fucking robin hood in the war on war on drugs! I feel like I may as well be back in prison.

I thought I was meant to be rehabilitated into normal society and learn to behave appropriately by being around normal people - instead it seems that the only options for housing are temporary places (NACRO) which are specifically for ex-offenders. I don't want to live around criminals anymore, they are boring, full of obvious yet deep and complex issues (alot of PD patients are in prison..) I can't learn anything from them, because none of them knew how to behave either - I envision the awkward silences, the "pretending-your-both-pretending-to-not-wonder-what-he's-in-for" moments, if I move into a ex-offender housing scheme.

I want a fresh start. There are polygraphs in the pipeline. I hear there are other fuckups on this board, I have seen two posts in the past to the tune of "I feel like sex-offending, why should/shouldn't I/please help"

For god's sake don't do it, you will lose hope of hope.

Prison was a beautiful experience for me it changed my life completely and for the first time indexed and limited the meaning of my problems stemming from crime-obsession and many mental illnesses - I was a fascinating fear, gratitude-for-hate and contempt-filled frustrated mess. I learned respect and ironic humor. I am a learned guy now I think. I foresaw the problems I describe in prison and saw no way around them.

I also had allegely a psychotic break in prison but that should be a whole 'nother thread if it is welcome, if not mods delete.

Also naloxone cures compulsive masturbation.
>> No. 26103 Anonymous
1st February 2018
Thursday 5:19 pm
26103 spacer
Is there any benefit to emigrating?
>> No. 26105 Anonymous
1st February 2018
Thursday 5:30 pm
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>>26103 Unlawful on license, I can't. I want to. It is a common dream amongst more self-deluding prisoners to "get aat the country, innit" . It has even been documented and classified as an "escape" fantasy in an academic publication I had access to in prison, the Howard League https://howardleague.org/publications/ . Can't find the specific issue.

I can't visit America, Australia, or China ever now. There are others.

I intend to try to let a bedsit without disclosing my convictions to the landlord. Probation have to approve.
>> No. 26106 Anonymous
1st February 2018
Thursday 6:48 pm
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>>26102
>I have seen two posts in the past to the tune of "I feel like sex-offending, why should/shouldn't I/please help"
Really? I don't remember that.
>> No. 26107 Anonymous
1st February 2018
Thursday 9:00 pm
26107 spacer
Honestly it seems as if they just want you to become a drug dealer/re-offender.

>I can't visit Australia

The bloody irony, eh.

If I was in your position I think I'd just do some cash in hand work and hope they don't find out, although I bet even an honest tax-dodging takeaway owner is hard to come by these days.
>> No. 26108 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 1:53 am
26108 spacer
There are self-help books about coming out of the American jail system when it's near impossible to get a job.

https://www.amazon.com/Locked-but-Not-Down-Surviving/dp/1935721003

I think they say go self-employed and cleaning is one thing you can be self-employed in and prisoners have some expertise in.
>> No. 26109 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 3:23 am
26109 spacer
>>26102

My brother lives next door to a former Labour politician who got caught hitting on what he thought were underage girls in chat rooms twice. My sister-in-law found out when her hairdresser told her and I can't remember why the police found out, maybe my brother contacted the police to check, but the police came around and told them they weren't allowed to tell anyone about it and asked who told them and my sister-in-law said "It just came up in general conversation."

They put the house up for sale as they have a five-year-old daughter and my brother asked the police "What if prospective buyers have a young daughter?" and the police said "You still can't tell them."

I find the contrast interesting how the police are telling my brother he'll get in legal trouble for gossiping about his neighbour but the police are running around telling everyone what you did.
>> No. 26110 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 8:29 am
26110 spacer
>>26109

Agreed, this is deeply worrying. I wasn't aware that people who committed offences had the police following up, ready to disclose details to employers.

I don't know if I'm being gullible, here, but the OP deserves the benefit of the doubt. It seems like a certain way to make sure someone can never fully reintegrate.
>> No. 26111 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 9:53 am
26111 spacer
>>26108

Self employment is a good option for ex-offenders, because you don't have to disclose your record. OP might want to consider going to college to get a trade, then getting on Enterprise Allowance.
>> No. 26112 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 10:36 am
26112 spacer
Are these gig economy jobs any good? Probably not Uber, but being a self-employed contractor might let you do work without needing to disclose to an employer?
>> No. 26113 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 11:25 am
26113 spacer
>>26111 OP here. Cheers for the thoughts; >>26110 i'm not lying anywhere!; Thanks for the sympathy.
police and probation have to give me permission to apply for any job prior to doing so and likewise to move into a house, that for the duration of my license.

I thought it would be unfair on possible future housemates for them to be friends with me and then a woman move into the house and the police tell her, and then she tells them, and then everyone feels lied to or betrayed by me hiding my conviction from them and shocked by it and they fall out with me - I'd rather not go through that its not fair on me or them. They wouldn't understand why these two offences happened and they wouldn't want to either.
There is very little accomodation for males only and I sound "gay" when I ring to ask a landlord, lol. I claimed I want it for peace to study purposes, as if women collect in gaggles and talk noisily all night or something in my imaginary past experience.

Trying to get on the council list, there are "local connection" arguments since I havn't lived here for 2/3 of the last five years..I can get on the homeless list and be put in emergency accomodation in a month, which is likely to be a B&B, then the coppers likely turn up and tell all the women in the place. :S

Or I go NACRO - don't know when that's available nor for how long, awaiting reply emails or calls.

Thats my logic - avoid police having to disclose to members of the public via males-only accomodation (there isn't any) or living in ex-offender-specific accomodation then try to get a council flat.

How would you feel if your female housemate told you the guy in the room upstairs - imagine large share-house that strangers move into and out of sometimes - was a convicted rapist. rrrrrrrright don't think that would go down well. Least i'm not dishonest. Disclaimed: posting somewhat for attn and to be interesting; no lies told.
>> No. 26114 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 1:08 pm
26114 spacer

jean genet.jpg
261142611426114
Have you considered becoming a writer?
Sexual degeneracy, evil and crime sell quite well.
>> No. 26115 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 2:06 pm
26115 spacer
>>26114 Yeah, I've got two thousand A4 sides done already of what I can only describe as preapocalypse spy-neuropsychiatry fiction. It takes the form of a plethora of messages between intelligence agencies, gods and citizens of other planets..
The shrinks (8) thought I was making it up
>> No. 26116 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 3:18 pm
26116 spacer
>>26115
Two thousand pages of A4 is around 800,000 words, depending on handwriting size. Even if you're writing in crayon it's going to be a hell of a lot. A normal book is about 70,000 words. For reference, the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy comes in at 480,000 words. You may want to focus on editing down rather than adding to it at this point.
>> No. 26117 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 4:05 pm
26117 spacer
>>26116
Now he just needs to find a publisher that doesn't employ any women.
>> No. 26119 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 6:38 pm
26119 spacer
>>26116 its ten 80-page A4 books, the handwriting being large and there being significant gaps frequently. Maybe its 1200 sides without the gaps -
It is somewhat like Samuel Beckett's Mouth in places - you have to guess what is going on. It isn't clear. It would require extensive annotation.. it's practically a new genre.

It might be most valueful put on the internet and labelled "record of complex hallucinations over 7-8 months in a prison" .. I used to write for hours every day. There is a great, amazing spy story behind it but its quite hard to conceive.. I have thoughts to scan it in and post.
>> No. 26120 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 7:11 pm
26120 spacer
>>26119
Type it up, don't scan it. Not many people will bother to read that much handwriting.
>> No. 26121 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 8:05 pm
26121 spacer
You could call the novel "NACROS"
>> No. 26122 Anonymous
2nd February 2018
Friday 10:11 pm
26122 spacer
>>26121
Clever.
>> No. 26153 Anonymous
8th February 2018
Thursday 4:54 pm
26153 spacer
OP Here well I aired my views to my probation officer regarding how it makes it difficult to get and keep a tenancy happily if the police disclose my convictions to women I would live with. We are having a meeting with the police, hostel staff and probation so I'll see what happens there - he's now saying he was when we last met undecided as to whether disclosure was necessary, which wasn't what I understood. He seemed mildly irritable. I'll take it to his boss if need be. I'm going to end up in a NACRO house I think, I am going to see them tomorrow.
I'll see what the results of the polygraph are. I propose to lie and walk away - can't get recalled for it - since I might have breached one of the more petty license conditions.
Enjoy music https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yr3QtT2KML8
>> No. 26154 Anonymous
8th February 2018
Thursday 5:18 pm
26154 spacer
>>26153
You can force an inconclusive on it, which despite what you may have seen on Jezza Kyle is not an indication of guilt. It's easy enough if you dose caffeine high enough.

Alternatively, if you spend some time in the run up meditating you can beat it. Pathological liars can beat it pretty consistently, they create a headspace unaffected by the anxiety of telling lies, i.e. the consequences of being caught, and can convince themselves of an alternative truth like "I didn't take drugs, it was a dream." as the only way to truly beat a lie detector without coaching is to believe what you're saying.
>> No. 26155 Anonymous
8th February 2018
Thursday 6:31 pm
26155 spacer
>>26154
I'm going for the fox cubs method:
Get three starving fox cubs and place them under my shirt, then put a coat on over the shirt and zip it up, and tighten the string around the base of the coat to hold them in.
The fox cubs are starved prior to this happening and I have to keep a straight face as they eat their way up through my abdomen, consuming my organs until they get to my heart.

Seriously, I considered phenazepam/alprazolam but I think they might pre-test for benzos. I can only get recalled if I admit something - if I lie and they detect it and I admit to no license breaches, they can't do anything. They use the test to pressure offenders to tell the truth.
>> No. 26158 Anonymous
9th February 2018
Friday 8:58 am
26158 spacer
I had no idea we used polygraphs in this country. I'm glad to hear you can't be convicted for failing a lie detector test, as they're utter bullshit.

I've heard you can be in the US, though it may just be the same as here - used to pressure you. Either way pretty fucking sinister and not that far away from implying false witnesses etc.
>> No. 26159 Anonymous
9th February 2018
Friday 2:31 pm
26159 spacer
>>26158 Polygraph evidence is not admissible in court so it cannot be used to convict. However it can be used to inform the judgements of a probation officer as to risk and what topics to explore in questioning an offender in weekly or fortnightly interviews. They only use them for classified-as High or Very High risk sex offenders in Britain at present.
The psychiatrist who saw me most recently told probation it was ok to proceed - shame that I underplayed my "Hallucinations" in order to make sure I wasn't sectioned!
It is irrelevant I just need to bear in mind where i stand. But who are they to demand the truth from me!? They aren't my friends and they don't trust me!

I have a theory that the more perfect our systems of monitoring and supervision the less the offenders within them feel like they can earn trust and reintegrate... Society generally would argue that the lack of trust is because of the initial offence, however. One ends up meeting prisoners who feel that they have nothing to leave prison for and don't care if they go back. Those without families or hope of jobs.

https://insidetime.org/there-is-no-rehabilitation-for-sex-offenders/

This article captures the sense of pointlessness he feels. Some offenders do groups and courses for years with hope of rehab and so forth at the end. I had a friend who got a fourteen-year sentence, which he deserved. I worry that he'll be lonely and feel pointless when he gets out. He was a competent engineer.

Prison makes you a masochist, and manic when you are in a good mood. Eyes slightly bulging from focusing too hard on something simple, the happy prisoner shuffles around his cell to the kettle singing to himself in his head, preparing for the daily cell-deep-clean and to watch television later. You have to enjoy the pain of boredom and guilt in order to survive.

I've applied today to Framework housing. Houses all over the place!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b4wDSF17JPY
>> No. 26160 Anonymous
9th February 2018
Friday 8:21 pm
26160 spacer
>>26155
Where have I read this before? There's some story in my memory I can't remember the origins of about someone who hides an animal cub in their clothes and has to pretend there's nothing there while it eats their insides until they fall down dead.
>> No. 26161 Anonymous
10th February 2018
Saturday 12:45 am
26161 spacer
>>26160
Not him, but there's something torture/killing thingy I had heard of involving an upturned bucket on the chest with a rat or weasle or something in, and perhaps it's heated until it just burrows into down.
>> No. 26162 Anonymous
10th February 2018
Saturday 2:18 pm
26162 spacer
>>26161
Think there's a model of this at York Dungeons. Caged rat on a man's chest, with a hot coal on top of the cage.
>> No. 26163 Anonymous
10th February 2018
Saturday 8:00 pm
26163 spacer
>>26162
I remember seeing this when I was there nearly 20 years ago. I bet it's still the same model.
>> No. 26164 Anonymous
11th February 2018
Sunday 4:09 pm
26164 spacer
>>26160 Horrible Histories! The Viking book I guess
>> No. 26180 Anonymous
14th February 2018
Wednesday 11:17 am
26180 spacer
>>26086 No, I have not been in that position and I do believe that if you offer yourself up for these things then it will probably make them feel better about it but you have to be wary that they might not believe you.
Nice picture. Bluebell woods are lovely.
>> No. 26186 Anonymous
27th February 2018
Tuesday 8:43 pm
26186 spacer
OP here;
passed the polygraph.
Awaiting instruction as to accomodation; NACRO full and waiting times not given, assumed long. The council told me even if I made it onto their list which I only might, an organisation would be very unlikely to offer me a council tenancy due to my convictions. I'm unaware whether that is legal discrimination, either way it can't be proven. All my "local connection" area's housing stock is owned by private associations.

It's possible I'll be in the probation hostel for like, a year? And then move into god knows where. I'm left unable to plan anything, with 55 GBP per week to waste or save.

Maybe i'll save and go private, TYVM for your time.

I feel like becoming Ray Mears and going to live in the wild and eat rabbit and pheasant until I run out of money. Has anyone done this?
Hope thread was interesting.
>> No. 26187 Anonymous
27th February 2018
Tuesday 9:18 pm
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>>26164
Ah it must be, I loved those books as a kid.
>> No. 26190 Anonymous
27th February 2018
Tuesday 11:41 pm
26190 spacer
>>26186 I considered many years ago to wander the country via the YMCA hostels. I met a few people who do that as there are quite a few. and you get to wander about a bit.
>> No. 26191 Anonymous
1st March 2018
Thursday 10:50 am
26191 spacer
>>26190 I think there are a lot of druggies and alcoholics there. There are also fit chicks apparently
>> No. 26192 Anonymous
1st March 2018
Thursday 10:51 am
26192 spacer
>>26190 sounds like a fun idea
>> No. 26407 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 5:27 pm
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>>26190OP Here well my council the only one to which I have a local connection, turned me down due to my convictions. The YMCA also turned me down. There is another hostel full of druggies in my city, which I am staying away from because it is meant to be hectic and horrible, a hell of druggies prison leavers and prostitutes. I have applied to two ex-offender hostels, one in my city and one in another. If they fail i'l be waiting for NACRO for 6/7 months. Sage
>> No. 26410 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 8:32 pm
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>>26160
Room 101 torture in 1984.
>> No. 26413 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 9:03 pm
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>>26410
That's almost exactly nothing like what I described. Nothing even happens in the story.
>> No. 26415 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 10:45 pm
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>>26407
NACRO are very good people, I did some work for them a long time ago. Lad, you're a sex offender who is out on license and as you've admitted in the OP, a history of other kinds of offences that you didn't get caught for. I am sure there is a background to this on why you have behaved the way you did, but what you're going through now is part of the punishment for those offences - it didn't stop the minute you left the prison gates - it will carry on for the next 10 years until the conviction(s) are spent. You don't get to choose when this ends.

I'm sorry to sound so harsh - I don't know how else to put it. NACRO are very good people, who have real experience dealing with others in the kind of situation you are in. They will help - but don't expect it to be a fucking picnic.
>> No. 26417 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 11:24 pm
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I can sympathise with OP as I know of a similar story where somebody was convicted of rape. As unbelievable as it sounds, it was a case of mistaken identity, where the guy and his wife were staying at friends of theirs for the weekend. They were all attending a wedding just down the street together, and then in the middle of the night when that guy faltered home completely off his tits and managed to let himself in, he took a wrong turn upstairs and landed in his friend's bedroom, where his friend's wife was sleeping. Crucially, in his drunken state, he didn't bother to turn on the lights, and just got in his friend's bed and started touching his friend's sleeping wife and apparently also began to penetrate her. She naturally woke up screaming and the guy realised his mistake. But the damage was done, and she wasn't going to let him off with a slap in the face. She filed rape charges and the poor lad was actually convicted and did two and a half years in prison. It was found that he was indeed quite drunk, which is why he only got two and a half years, but that he wasn't too drunk to not have noticed that the woman in the bed wasn't his wife before attempting to penetrate her. The woman was unrelenting, she wasn't going to have any of it that it was just an honest mistake, and kept saying that her goal was to see him behind bars, so that is what then happened.

Anyway, the guy lost everything. His wife, kids, the house, his career. Up until that point, he was just an average guy with no criminal record. He had a nine to five desk job and all the other markings of an average everyday bloke. But doing time for rape ruined him. When he got out, no company would hire him in his old line of work, possible employers told him if it was up to them they wouldn't mind, but that workplace anti-sexual harrassment regulations would make hiring a convicted rapist almost impossible to defend.

They tell you you've paid your debt to society when you get out. But the ugly truth seems to be that for certain crimes, you never stop paying.

I have loads of sympathy for OP. I can only say that I value an ex convict as a human being just as much as I value the next guy, as long as that ex convict is a reformed individual who now really wants to get his shit together and commit no more crimes. All the best for you, OP, I'm sure getting back into society is pretty fucking difficult where you are at right now. But don't give up.
>> No. 26418 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 11:34 pm
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>>26417
>Crucially, in his drunken state, he didn't bother to turn on the lights, and just got in his friend's bed and started touching his friend's sleeping wife and apparently also began to penetrate her.

I don't want to sully your otherwise supportive post - but that is still rape, even if it was his own wife.
>> No. 26419 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 11:55 pm
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>>26417

>it was a case of mistaken identity

Very easy to say that, mind.
>> No. 26420 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 11:57 pm
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>>26418

Well he did spend two and a half years in prison because the court also found that it was rape, despite his very drunken state.

I don't know; maybe his own wife didn't mind all that much being penetrated in her sleep and so he thought it was going to be ok, since he firmly believed it was his own wife he was doing it to in the dark in that bedroom and off his tits. Who knows.

He tried to argue his point in court that the whole thing was really just a very, very bad and unfortunate mistake. But his friend's wife wasn't having any of it, and if the victim says she felt she was being raped, then that's very usually the end of it.
>> No. 26421 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 11:58 pm
26421 spacer
>>26413
Oh, I thought you meant the thing about the rats being forced to eat through someone, the story about hiding a fox cub in clothing comes from sparta
http://www.mainlesson.com/display.php?author=guerber&book=greeks&story=boy
>> No. 26422 Anonymous
29th March 2018
Thursday 12:06 am
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>>26420
It's a very emotive subject - I am prepared to believe there are grey areas in rape, and that there are women who lie/change their minds, or who cry rape to fuck peoples lives up - all of those are a matter of record in the courts.

Leave aside whether he regularly penetrated his wife while she was asleep and maybe she was perfectly fine with that, I cannot even slightly imagine being so drunk that I didn't realise the bird I was naked in bed with wasn't my wife, let alone fuck her.

I have great sympathy for people who deal with the consequences of these kinds of offences for many years after, like your mate and the OP, you'd have to have a heart of stone not to - I believe in rehabilitation, genuinely. But many times when you hear stories like your m8 I can't help but feel he a) knew what he was doing at the time and b) is trying to rewrite history to deal with it and isn't actually rehabilitated.
>> No. 26424 Anonymous
29th March 2018
Thursday 12:21 am
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>>26422

Well you can't help feeling that something about it seems a bit dodgy. If it was me in that situation, you would really have to put me in bed with somebody who was a complete doppelganger of my own girlfriend.

On the other hand, during my wild days, one of my female friends really got so pissed at a party once that she actually started frenching a random lad in the crowd, who, granted, did look slightly like her actual boyfriend. It was only when my girlfriend tapped her on the shoulder and said "What the fuck are you doing?" that she realised that that wasn't her boyfriend. I was there and witnessed the whole thing, it blew my mind, but it actually happened.

And again, getting back to my friend, the court half accepted that he was not as fully aware of his own actions as a sober person should have been in that situation, hence only two and a half years. But it ruled that it couldn't just let him off, because his actions still did constitute rape.
>> No. 26425 Anonymous
29th March 2018
Thursday 12:23 am
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>>26420

>I don't know; maybe his own wife didn't mind all that much being penetrated in her sleep and so he thought it was going to be ok,

That's a fair assumption, you do have certain relaxed boundaries when it comes to relationships. I know my missus wouldn't think it was sexual assault if I tried to wake her up with a bit of a poke, and vice versa, it's just something you establish over the years together. I'm sure in this chaps case, had he been drunkenly trying to bang his actual wife, the worst he could have expected was her telling him to piss off.

I apologise for further speculation, but....I think I'd notice if I got into bed with the wrong woman, even if I was plastered and it was dark? We're talking about the woman he's been intimately familiar with for years, how would you not notice?
>> No. 26428 Anonymous
29th March 2018
Thursday 5:45 pm
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Thing is, there is a level of drunk where you can do very out of character things. I think it has to be over the line where you're so drunk you literally don't remember things, because when you think about it, you're practically acting unconsciously at that point. I'm fairly sure we've all been in that state at some point in our lives, and if not, you either have a very high alcohol tolerance or haven't had very many good nights out.

For instance, I'm reliably informed I've nearly been arrested for getting in a scrap once, but that's the furthest thing from what I would do normally, I'm a massive pussy really. I have literally no memory of it- The last thing I do remember on that particular night is waiting to get in a place and knocking over an entire line of that temporary steel fencing they use form queues out of. I don't remember how I got home. I could have done anything.
>> No. 26432 Anonymous
30th March 2018
Friday 2:45 pm
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>>26417

Mistake or not, a lass woke up realising she was being raped (by someone she knew and trusted!), so it's really not unfair he got convicted of rape. She was raped. Probably still going to wake up in the night screaming for a few years at least.

Incidentally if he'd been an unemployed weirdo, would that have made him seem more like a rapist to you? Do you think people who work office jobs are less likely to, or incapable of, rape? Your post reads very angry at a woman who's main fault seems to have been being angry about waking up getting raped, why shouldn't she want to see him in prison? I mean, I'm saying it a lot, but he literally raped her..
>> No. 26433 Anonymous
30th March 2018
Friday 3:11 pm
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You would think that sex offenders have the most difficulty settling back into a normal life after prison. But really, I don't think there's any offence that you went to prison for that will make it easy for your to rebuild your life after you get out.

If you were in prison for theft or fraud or any crimes in connection with money, I doubt any company will think you would be a trustworthy employee. You probably won't even get a job at Burger King where you would get to handle the till.

And I don't think it looks much better with violent crimes like assault, manslaughter or even murder. As far as most people will be concerned, you proved that you have it in you to hurt another person so badly that you were sent to prison for it.

I honestly believe that people can change, that they can get their act together and that they can leave their past behind and become a valuable member of society no matter what they did. The hardest part for OP will probably be to get a foot in the door somewhere, but I think once somebody is prepared to take a leap of faith like that with you, there is a realistic possibility that you will be reintegrated into society as a valuable member of it.

Never give up, OP.
>> No. 26434 Anonymous
30th March 2018
Friday 3:57 pm
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>>26433

In my experience most violent offenders do get jobs quite easily, honestly I think people find that someone capable of assault makes a good leader.
>> No. 26435 Anonymous
30th March 2018
Friday 4:01 pm
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>>26433
There are lots of jobs where the employer isn't entitled to request a DBS check, with Burger King squarely in that category.
>> No. 26436 Anonymous
30th March 2018
Friday 5:13 pm
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>>26424

My mum left one of those women's magazines in the bathroom years ago and there was a story about a new bride whose husband's identical twin brother got into bed with her in the dark and she only noticed because he had scars on his hands. They must have been bumpy scars.

There was also an agony aunt column where this girl's boyfriend's and his twin brother asked her to have a threesome. The agony aunt said these men were very dangerous and she must immediately dump him but I thought it sounded kind of hot. I'd at least be appreciative of being offered a chance to do something hardly anyone got to experience, even if I ended up saying thanks but no thanks.
>> No. 26437 Anonymous
30th March 2018
Friday 5:14 pm
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>>26425

You can expect me to rip your head off if you wake me up for anything, also, morning breath.
>> No. 26438 Anonymous
30th March 2018
Friday 5:16 pm
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>>26435

You'd have to fib on the application form where it asks if you have any convictions.
>> No. 26439 Anonymous
30th March 2018
Friday 6:31 pm
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>>26436

>There was also an agony aunt column where this girl's boyfriend's and his twin brother asked her to have a threesome. The agony aunt said these men were very dangerous and she must immediately dump him but I thought it sounded kind of hot.


One caveat there; what if a threesome like that ends with the woman getting pregnant? How do you establish who's the dad if they're identical twins? Or really in any scenario where you have sex with your identical twin brother's partner.
>> No. 26440 Anonymous
30th March 2018
Friday 7:08 pm
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>>26439
>Or really in any scenario where you have sex with your identical twin brother's partner.

The perfect crime
>> No. 26441 Anonymous
30th March 2018
Friday 7:21 pm
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>>26439
>How do you establish who's the dad if they're identical twins?
You could use a (more thorough than usual) DNA test.

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