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>> No. 26471 Anonymous
3rd April 2018
Tuesday 6:46 pm
26471 Armchair me, lads
So, my relationship with my partner is pretty solid. We're going on a few years together now, and have supported each other through sticky shit like job loss and things. For the most part our relationship is very loving, and we have a lot of mutual friends who are great people who I also enjoy hanging out with - even the 'girlfriends' whose main interests seems to be awful pop music and talking too much tend to be alright at the end of the day. However, I maintain that we should maintain SOME friends who are separate and don't know both of us massively well, specifically in the situation that IF we ever break up, we'll both need friendship circles there to support us who don't know the other party. That and it's just healthy to have people who know you outside of your relationship, imo. Makes you more interesting to be around and lessens the likelihood of you becoming one of those sad sacks with a shared FB account. I don't intend on breaking up with her, but I've been open with my reasons for not wanting to hang out with ALL of her fucking friends. Essentially, I think I love her too much to leave her without any support if a meteor does ever hit one of us or something, and having been through the loss of friendship circles due to a long-term relationship breaking down before I know how awkward it can get.

How can I best phrase this so that she doesn't pout at me when I encourage her to hang out with her mates but decline the invite for me to come too?
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>> No. 26472 Anonymous
3rd April 2018
Tuesday 6:54 pm
26472 spacer
Don't ever mention the "in case we break up" bit ever again. It's sensible and pragmatic, but it's fuel for any underlying insecurities. It's much easier to frame these sorts of things in a semi-romantic light, focusing on the aspects that will make your relationship stronger.

I'd make the case that you should both have your own friends and your own hobbies, because you'll be more interesting to each other. If you do everything together, you've got nothing to talk about. You don't want to become one of those miserable couples you see in restaurants who are just sick of the sight of each other. Keeping some parts of your life separate makes the time you spend together more special. Absence makes the heart grow fonder etc.
>> No. 26478 Anonymous
4th April 2018
Wednesday 1:35 am
26478 spacer
This is solid advice, but all I'm seeing is more tropes and that bit from Gone Girl.

Aw, hell.

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