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>> No. 26633 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 12:23 pm
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How does everyone else do life

How do you go from having no friends to being satisfied when you move place, how do you meet people, how do you do anything

I haven't had a casual conversation with another human being for two years
Expand all images.
>> No. 26634 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 12:28 pm
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>>26633
Who would you like to speak to?
>> No. 26635 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 1:12 pm
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Hobbies lad.

It's occurred to me lately that we have a lot of these sorts of thread, and my new stock answer is going to be "start buying and painting little plastic army dudes".

You might turn your nose up at first but something like Warhammer is a productive and rewarding hobby (the modelling, collecting and painting) and connecting with other people over a common interest (joining a club or going to your local shop for a game of dudes).

The fact you're all there to fight your dudes against one another is a built in icebreaker perfect for people who struggle with socialising, which let's be honest, is about 90% of the modern population.
>> No. 26636 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 2:39 pm
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>>26635
Your heart is in the right place, but I don't think it is that good choice of hobby for achieving the goal of meeting people. There is a lot of busy work in making and painting modles. I have nothing against either of those things but if your goal is to meet people and play games suddenly that is a chore, and it is the same reason I still have 7 unbuilt tomb king chariots even though they discontiued the army years ago.

OP I recommend having a browse of this place and seeing if anything takes your fancy. https://www.meetup.com/
>> No. 26637 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 3:45 pm
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>>26636

Just an observation: Meetup tends to be vastly more useful in more populous cities. The more populous the city, the more likely it is you'll find groups you're better suited to.

Don't be discouraged if you live in a small town, though. You may just have to make your search more 'manual'. I say take anything you want to learn and just go for it. An evening class in cooking, chess, motorcycling, hot yoga, five-a-side, marathons, anything. It doesn't matter, you'll be tripping over people all the time, and generally people actively joining clubs want to make friends.

Warning: taking up motorcycling may annoy >>/101/26790 a bit, but he's a wet blanket anyway.
>> No. 26638 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 4:03 pm
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>>26636
This. If you want a sociable hobby then take up something like hockey. If you're female then you have the options of netball and roller derby.
>> No. 26639 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 5:21 pm
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>>26636

True, I just feel like it's a comfortable environment for people who likely already have shut-in tendencies. Hence posting here. I know I for one feel much more comfortable interacting with people when we're already on common ground with an established pretext for the occasion.

There are other alternatives of course. One has to choose something that tickles one's personal fancy.
>> No. 26640 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 8:54 pm
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>>26635

There are loads of board game clubs popping up these days, which satisfies the "activity to occupy socially awkward men between gaps in small talk" criteria with none of the "paying £60 for a plastic tank and spending half your evenings covering the dining table in drips of super glue" nonsense.

I'd also suggest an evening class. You're all beginners, so there's far less chance that you'll find yourself trying to inveigle your way into a well-established clique. If you pick something like cookery or a foreign language, there'll probably be a decent gender ratio.

The Quakers might be worth a go if you've got a local meeting - they offer the community of a church, but without the god bit.

Volunteering might also be a good option. Charities and community projects are crying out for volunteers at the moment. Doing something to help other people can have a really positive impact on your self-esteem.

https://do-it.org/

If you've been very isolated recently, I'd suggest setting yourself the goal of having at least one social interaction every day. Something trivial like asking a librarian to recommend a book or making small-talk at the bus stop can be surprisingly powerful in making you feel more like a part of society.
>> No. 26651 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 12:42 am
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>>26633

I know this won't be particularly helpful but maybe at least you'll feel less alone.

> How does everyone else do life

Poorly

> How do you go from having no friends to being satisfied when you move place, how do you meet people, how do you do anything

I don't. I make acquaintances, sometimes, through hobbies. It's very. very, rare that I ever see people outside the times and places of the execution of these hobbies, though.

I honestly feel like the further we get from our university age years the harder it is to make friends. Back then someone would always be holding a party at their place on any given weekend, and I'd go home with 4 o 5 or more new "friends" or phone numbers (this being back in the stone ages before smart phones). Now I'm well outside of that age group, everyone seems more or less busy with their own life, everyone's always tired, most people I knew back then aren't even in the same country any more never mind the same town, and to be honest I barely have time to meet people for a chat anyway.

Weekends are the loneliest time, weekends and the long dark 6pm - 11pm teatime of the soul, as Douglas Adams called it.

>>26635

I used to play 40k 2nd Ed and Warhammer 4th Ed when I was a nipper and there's no way I'd play the current cheese fest that it's turned into. Blood Bowl still looks fun, (more an actual game and not just a way to bleed you dry on buying new models every revision depending on what is buffed and what is nerfed each time around) but the primary games themselves just no longer appeal. The amount of fluff that is retconned each time around also really rumples my crumpets.

Sage for obvious reasons.
>> No. 26657 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 11:32 am
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>>26651
>Weekends are the loneliest time, weekends and the long dark 6pm - 11pm teatime of the soul, as Douglas Adams called it.

I really do second the "join evening classes/start doing some kind of group exercise/volunteer your time" line. As adults you really have to start carving out time for things you care about, and shared hobbies are good places to start. There's still some free forms of these first two knocking around; ParkRun groups, board games nights (they really are taking off, >>26640 has the nail right on the head), anything at your local community centre. Your local food bank always needs volunteers too, if you can take yourself outside of your own head for a bit and focus solely on the job of stock taking and package assembling for others (without crying at the numbers of people and situations necessitating food banks these days). >>26639 and everyone else expounding on this theme has it right. Bite the bullet and go outside, mate, or you can't lament that nothing is ever changing if you don't do owt.

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