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>> No. 14963 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 11:46 am
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https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/new-mums-horror-husbands-porn-12372512

>A woman has revealed her horror at discovering the full extent of her husband's 'porn addiction' after PornHub connected to Bluetooth while they were driving with their one-month-old son.

>The fed-up 24-year-old said her partner watches it almost every day and even sneaks into the bathroom early on weekends to log on while ignoring his four-month-old son crying nearby.
Expand all images.
>> No. 14964 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 11:59 am
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>>14963
Where do I buy that keyboard with the porn button?
>> No. 14965 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 12:26 pm
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6eFNRKEROw
>> No. 14966 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 12:31 pm
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Grumpy old man link for people who don't want to give the Mirror clicks: https://archive.fo/rZ6UZ
>> No. 14968 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 12:44 pm
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>>14963


> sneaks into the bathroom early on weekends to log on while ignoring his four-month-old son crying nearby

I don't know what she's complaining about, when my son was a consta-crying 4 month old I'd sneak into the fucking bathroom to drink a few cans of super-strength lager to deal with the existential dread of it all.

> he had deleted his history

> "Upon doing further digging, I found around 40+ porn videos on his history.

IN his history. Good lord, is the Mirror where they people who fail their English degrees to die? At least throw a (SIC) as the sort of sub 80 IQ cunts who read the Mirror grunt "Yeah it is fucken sick en all" in there to show that you have some kind grasp of the English Language.

Also if he'd deleted his history, or - mystery solved here lads - used incognito mode, how did "more digging" uncover "40 sites"? Did she read the world renowned "Teach yourself encrypted storage mobile data recovery in 24 hours" book that O'Reilly allegedly sell if do you the correct hand signals while standing on one leg in Waterstones?

Everything about this boils my piss and I'm off to make a cup of tea.

Sage for everything probably boiling my piss because I've not had enough tea / coke zero yet.


Sage for early morning (it's Sunday lads) uncaffeinated rage.
>> No. 14969 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 1:18 pm
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>>14968
>is the Mirror where they people who fail their English degrees to die?
>> No. 14970 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 1:32 pm
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>>14968

>IN his history.

In any case, I always wonder if snooping around your partner's Internet search history isn't the bigger breach of trust than your lad waxing his carrot now and then to Internet porn.

But that's not the most disturbing thing you can do on your partner's PC.

https://www.paraben-sticks.com/porn-detection-stick.html

It's advertised as a means against being slipped illicit pictures onto your own computer without you knowing, but we all know that this is something that will be used 99.9% by jealous girlfriends or wives.
>> No. 14971 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 2:19 pm
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>>14970
>In any case, I always wonder if snooping around your partner's Internet search history isn't the bigger breach of trust than your lad waxing his carrot now and then to Internet porn.
"Trust but verify."
>> No. 14972 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 2:33 pm
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>>14971
> "Trust but verify."

I too am old and cynical but I agree with the above statement. Honestly I couldn't give a shit about my partner watching porn or shoving horse cock dildos up her vag or whatever because it's her body but in this fast moving world of online dating you do have a reason to keep both eyes open.

Plenty of mental slags perfectly nice women will fall into bed with a man because they burnt your toast this morning and you had a strop about it and haven't got it up for a week because you're having stress issues with work where you've been working twelve hour days this week.

No fucker's a saint and no one is above temptation. Getting upset for "micro flirting" or even overt flirting in some lines of work (unless it's done deliberately under your nose) or porn is just whack-a-doodle in my opinion but you can go from hi to "aiii" to bye in under an hour these days with tinder and bumble and that.

I always trusted my wife and I was a fucking mong for doing so. Orai e vigiai - trust but verify. Even Jesus had it right.
>> No. 14973 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 3:54 pm
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>>14972
>Orai e vigiai
I thought that meant "any hole's a goal"?
>> No. 14974 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 5:46 pm
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>>14973
Google translate seems to think it's Lithuanian.
>> No. 14975 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 6:22 pm
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>>14974
Not if you select Portuguese it doesn't.
>> No. 14976 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 7:21 pm
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>>14968

>40 videos

Honestly I usually open about 30 tabs when I'm wanking, I usually don't make it through even five, but I like to have the option.

I hope my girlfriend doesn't report me to the papers.
>> No. 14977 Anonymous
6th May 2018
Sunday 7:26 pm
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>>14972

My mindset has been, for a long time, that whenever I enter into a relationship I assume it will end, and I assume I'll be cheated on. It's not so much a judgement on the women I've been out with, just a mindset I've found effective. I've only been cheated on a couple of times, but I was only surprised the very first time.

>“Do you see this glass?” he asked us. “I love this glass. It holds the water admirably. When the sun shines on it, it reflects the light beautifully. When I tap it, it has a lovely ring. Yet for me, this glass is already broken. When the wind knocks it over or my elbow knocks it off the shelf and it falls to the ground and shatters, I say, ‘Of course.’ But when I understand that this glass is already broken, every minute with it is precious.”
>> No. 14979 Anonymous
7th May 2018
Monday 12:46 am
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>>14977

>My mindset has been, for a long time, that whenever I enter into a relationship I assume it will end, and I assume I'll be cheated on

That's really not the worst approach. It may sound cynical at first glance, but in the end, being cheated on hurts the most when you've led yourself to believe that that particular person you're with would never do such a thing. Just expect that there is a real possibility that somebody will indeed cheat on you, and take it from there. Just be prepared to draw your consequences if the situation requires it.
>> No. 14981 Anonymous
7th May 2018
Monday 2:32 am
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>>14979

Exactly. I was absolutely devastated the first time it happened to me, I was probably about 18 so didn't have much to go on. A couple more girlfriends later, plus my friends experiences made me realise you just can't get too invested. It still hurts when I break up with someone so many years later, but it's not the same raw devastation I felt back then, and that's definitely a good thing.

I also learned that once they've cheated the relationship needs to be over. You can't come back from that. I'm a very sentimental person so I have to fight myself pretty hard, but walking away from a relationship is something I have done several times and I'm sure that doing it has saved me from a lot of emotional trauma.
>> No. 14983 Anonymous
7th May 2018
Monday 10:29 am
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>>14981

Probably creates a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy though don't you think?

I mean I'm kind d of exactly the same, but I think that is actually one of the reasons I fail to form real connections in the long run, and they end up feeling pushed away by my emotional distance.

Most of my relationships break down in that phase where you've been together a while and all the little things just start to rub each other the wrong way- If I wasn't so closed off based on the numerous heartbreaks when I was a younger lad maybe I'd be able to get over those rough patches, but instead I just start finding excuses to spend less time with them and they inevitably cheat or leave when I've spent the last fortnight determinedly playing computer games instead of speaking to them.

It's wierd how you can recognise your own failings while simultaneously being unable to really do much to change them really.
>> No. 14984 Anonymous
7th May 2018
Monday 1:05 pm
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>>14983

>Probably creates a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy though don't you think?

It can, if you're not careful. For example, once, about a year after somebody broke up with me, the whole aftermath was so traumatising that it really still weighed on my ability to be with somebody new. So about a year after what had been my most painful breakup so far, I met this all around wonderful lass who was just really quite amazing in every respect, looking back. Anyway, I was still reeling from the breakup the year before, and my view on relationships in general was really much more glum than it would have needed to be. I must have given her the impression that either I wasn't interested in her enough or that I saw no future in our relationship, so she broke up with me after three months, saying that she needed to be with somebody who wasn't always so "gloom and doom". And in all fairness, she really had a point.

So in a technical sense, my idea that all relationships fail fulfilled itself. But it did to a large degree BECAUSE I was thinking that failure was inevitable.

Nowadays, I still enter a relationship thinking that it's only realistic to assume that the relationship might end again at some point. But it's something that I now keep in the very back of my head, and instead I really focus more on the person that I am with and try to enjoy the relationship. While it lasts, yes, but again, the thought that it won't last isn't something that dominates my thinking.
>> No. 14985 Anonymous
7th May 2018
Monday 6:53 pm
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>>14977

>“Do you see this glass?” he asked us. “I love this glass. It holds the water admirably. When the sun shines on it, it reflects the light beautifully. When I tap it, it has a lovely ring. Yet for me, this glass is already broken. When the wind knocks it over or my elbow knocks it off the shelf and it falls to the ground and shatters, I say, ‘Of course.’ But when I understand that this glass is already broken, every minute with it is precious.”

This will be my morning meditation for the next few weeks. Thanks lad.
>> No. 14986 Anonymous
7th May 2018
Monday 7:08 pm
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>>14977

Sounds pretty similar to the bushido approach of living as if you're already dead.
>> No. 14987 Anonymous
7th May 2018
Monday 7:45 pm
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>>14986

Freemasonry has a similar allegory, I think it's a pretty universal philosophical idea.
>> No. 14988 Anonymous
7th May 2018
Monday 11:40 pm
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Is wankingg to porn 3 times a day really shocking behavior and I've become wholly divorced from the values of decent society. Or is this a story about insecure women failing to put in the effort into keeping up their looks and then being shocked that their husband looks else where. I just can't tell anymore. But I know one of those narative is as old as time itself and humans don't seem to have changed that much.
>> No. 14989 Anonymous
7th May 2018
Monday 11:57 pm
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With my last girlfriend I remember accidentally seeing a tinder notification on her phone one morning (accidentally as she was in the shower and I was trying to turn its damn alarm off...). I never mentioned it to her but was one of many factors that fueled my insecurity which ultimately led to us breaking up. The rational part of me knows that in all likelihood it was benign but I still don't know for sure.

Would you lads had said/done anything in that position? I wanted to talk about it but couldn't think of how to bring it up without causing an argument or coming off as terribly insecure.
>> No. 14990 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 12:44 am
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>>14989

> Would you lads had said/done anything in that position? I wanted to talk about it but couldn't think of how to bring it up without causing an argument or coming off as terribly insecure.

There's no excuse for your bird having a dating / hookup app on her phone unless you're in an open relationship or she works for the company in question (or in my case pentesting the fucking piece of wank).
>> No. 14991 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 2:48 am
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>>14989

Depends on the notification, really - if she got a match or message then she was actively using it, i.e cheating on you. If it was just one of the 'hello we're still here' notifications then I might raise an eyebrow, but I could see that being her just not bothering to delete the app, to be honest I just checked my phone and it still has tinder installed despite me being in a relationship for quite some time - I don't use it, I just forgot it was there. Though I must have turned notifications off somehow.
>> No. 14992 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 9:25 am
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>>14991
>if she got a match or message then she was actively using it, i.e cheating on you.
No. You've drawn two conclusions here and neither is logical.
>> No. 14993 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 9:54 am
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>>14992

Really?

Unless people have started messaging months after they match, or somehow matching with others despite not logging in since before the relationship (possible, but hasn't happened in my long and storied tinder career - you usually match maximum two days after swiping people), then it seems pretty logical, and if she's using it actively, if she hasn't cheated, she's certainly trying to.
>> No. 14994 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 1:12 pm
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>>14989

>The rational part of me knows that in all likelihood it was benign but I still don't know for sure.

How can it be "benign" to be an active user of a dating and hookup app?

It's no more benign than being out in a club with your lass and she lets herself get chatted up by strangers buying drinks for her.

The problem with modern communication is indeed that the opportunities and temptations to even barely initiate any kind of cheating are so manifold. And you inevitably run into the moral dilemma of having to be more alert to that sort of thing, while at the same time not wanting to become your partner's GCHQ.

One of my mates lost his live-in girlfriend to an online acquaintance that she had met playing online computer games in one of the pertinent chat rooms, usually late at night when my mate was in bed or working evening shifts at a restaurant. What began casually soon turned into her chatting with the guy nearly every night on her boyfriend's computer (this was before whatsapp and smartphones), and then even going to visit him on weekends now and then, when she said she was going to her sister's, a friend's, or whatever, but really spent those weekends fucking the other guy.

My friend started digging around when he began to have a feeling that certain things about the weekends she was spending without him just weren't adding up. So he looked at his girlfriend's text messages on her phone, and sure enough, there was a lad called Dan that she had been texting with, and curiously, they were things like "I will be there in 30 minutes. Can't wait. XOXO." and these texts were sent to this Dan fellow on weekends when she was supposedly going to see her sister or an old friend in Cambridge.

Confronted with the incriminating evidence, she came clean to him that she had been cheating on him for the better part of two months, and that she was for all intents and purposes in a relationship with this Dan, and that she just hadn't had the heart to tell him.
>> No. 14995 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 1:57 pm
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>>14993
>Unless people have started messaging months after they match
You underestimate the tenacity of men.

>in my long and storied tinder career ... if she's using it actively, if she hasn't cheated, she's certainly trying to.
Ah, I see. When you're not successful with women on the app, they are just using it to feel better about themselves. But if they are already in a relationship, well, that's 100% evidence of being a cheating whore m'lud.
>> No. 14996 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 2:58 pm
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>>14995

>Ah, I see. When you're not successful with women on the app, they are just using it to feel better about themselves. But if they are already in a relationship, well, that's 100% evidence of being a cheating whore m'lud.

Those aren't mutually exclusive at all. It's only fair to uninstall it while you're in a committed relationship.
>> No. 14997 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 3:04 pm
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>>14996
That's up to you and your own perception of how relationships work. It isn't a view shared by everyone. For instance, I think that if my partner wanted to cheat on me, whether or not they have Tinder on their phone is not going to matter.
>> No. 14999 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 3:26 pm
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>>14997

This. If you mean the world to your partner and they are madly in love with you, that is to say if your relationship is healthy and in order, it's not that likely that your partner will cheat on you in the first place. It is usually when a partner feels unhappy with you or like there is something missing in your relationship that they will feel drawn to cheating on you. The abundant availability of potential people to cheat on you with really only then becomes a danger to your relationship.
>> No. 15000 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 5:54 pm
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>>14995

>Ah, I see. When you're not successful with women on the app, they are just using it to feel better about themselves. But if they are already in a relationship, well, that's 100% evidence of being a cheating whore m'lud.

What the hell are you on about? I don't understand how you got that from my post. Whether I'm successful or not has nothing to do with the reasons a woman (or man) in a relationship would be using tinder. Even if I'd never pulled a single bird on there, I'm still pretty sure I know what the app is for. Pulling.

If someone's using tinder, a dating app, they are quite likely to be looking for a date, are they not? And if they're in a relationship, what else is that but at the very least a rather strong indication they might not be faithful?

Honestly I'm struggling to understand what other reason you think there'd be for someone to be using tinder actively in while in a monogamous relationship.
>> No. 15002 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 5:57 pm
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>>14997

>>I think that if my partner wanted to cheat on me, whether or not they have Tinder on their phone is not going to matter.

That's really missing the point though isn't it - the discussion is whether an active tinder account is an indicator that your partner is unfaithful, and it absolutely is. We're not trying to say tinder is making your girlfriend cheat on you, rather that she'd be using tinder if she was cheating on you. You've just inverted the point for some reason.
>> No. 15003 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 6:19 pm
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The appropriate course of action is to confront immediately in a non-accusing way solely with the facts and none of the mad conjecture that tends to be running wild in peoples' heads when they suspect cheating that they can then use to "justify" shitty behaviour. If someone looks at my phone my relationship with that person is over, I don't care what you thought you saw or could swear you overheard. Get the fuck out of my house and never come back.
>> No. 15005 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 10:45 pm
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>>15000

This

>>15002

And this

>>15003

And you sound like a paranoid schizophrenic.

As I said before there are VERY few legitimate reasons for having tinder on your phone unless you are at least considering being unfaithful. There are possible reasons beyond those that I listed (working at tinder, having to work with the app for other reasons) but if this is any kind of real, committed, relationship then your girl obviously has some really rather worrying issues she you both needs to deal with (such as her needing more attention, you needing to pay more attention to / spoil her more, her just having a crushing inferiority complex and needing the verification of men swiping right on her (which means nothing at all beyond a man wanting to get his dick wet anyway).

In any case it's something that needs to be sorted right away. If you just leave it be you're a total spud, lad.
>> No. 15006 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 10:58 pm
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>>15003

>If someone looks at my phone my relationship with that person is over

I wouldn't quite go as far as that, but I believe in maintaining a bare minimum of privacy even within a long-term relationship. Even if you live together and spend half the day together with each other, there needs to be a place for certain personal stuff that not even your partner is privy to.

Then again, I have been officially diagnosed with schizoid personality disorder (do make yourself familiar with the distinction between schizoid and schizophrenia before commenting). A schizoid needs his privacy in a relationship like the air to breathe. Some even maintain entire secret lives that their partner won't know about. Anyway, my point is, nothing seems more horrible to me than the thought of not being allowed to have a secret world all to myself even within the closest of relationships. It's where I do my routine sanity maintenance and get the strength to deal with the world around me.

In practice, I would probably never even become involved long-term with a partner in the first place who would give me the impression during casual dating that she is a control freak. That is one of my biggest dealbreakers, up there with somebody discussing their family planning aspirations on the first date.
>> No. 15007 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 11:04 pm
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>>15005
So spying one someone isn't paranoid but not wanting to be spied on is? I've seen people do horrible, horrible things as a result of this mindset. It's literally a red alert to anyone with a modicum of self-respect.
>> No. 15008 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 12:56 am
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>>15007

Where are you getting that from his post?
>> No. 15009 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 2:08 am
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>>15008
>And you sound like a paranoid schizophrenic.

If you told someone that because they caught you going through their phone you are an abuser.
>> No. 15010 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 2:44 am
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>>15009

What are you on about lad? I'm saying he sounds like one because he'd kick someone out of his house because he found them going through his phone. Are you one too?

Are there two or three of us that are mental now? Purpz it really is time for /menk/.
>> No. 15011 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 2:49 am
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>>15006

> I have been officially diagnosed with schizoid personality disorder

I suspect I have it myself, my psychiatrist says it's too early to say but that I'm definitely not developing later stage schizophrenia (and yes I do know the different) despite the fact I've been playing Tea for the Tiller Man on loop and crying for two weeks straight. I'm just form form of (probably paranoid) bipolar. I do hit just about every single symptom on the SPD chart though, so maybe this guy just doesn't want to diagnose me.

Sage for double posting and forgetting to buy ant killer today. My desk is full of ants, and no this is not a drugs (or psychotic) hallucination) I'm just a messy fucker.
>> No. 15012 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 3:13 am
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>>15010
Why would you continue to willingly interact with someone who feels entitled to spy on you? Why am I considered mentally unwell for not desiring contact with people who demonstrably intend me harm? If someone will look through your phone they will do anything else they like to you whenever they feel like it. The only solution is to get rid and stay rid.
>> No. 15013 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 6:20 am
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>>15012

Is this what I sounded like last week before my meds kicked in, lads?

Serious, serious apologies if so.

Regards, banned 100 times Lad.
>> No. 15014 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 6:27 am
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>>15013

You were worse, but somehow your arguments still made more sense.

glad you're less mental this week anyway mate
>> No. 15015 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 11:10 am
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>>15013>>15014
No offence lads but these replies have really brought my morning down. I'm sure you two in particular are well-intentioned or whatever but I find it extremely frustrating that every time. Every fucking time. Someone will pipe up to defend abusive and controlling behaviour. It's why I will never get help. It's why I will literally die here in this room.
Very bad people who like to do very bad things rely on useful idiots like you existing in huge numbers but who cares because "she was laughing and looking at her phone so I know something's up".

Taking someone's choice out of what they do and do not share with you about their personal life is 110%, fundamentally and objectively wrong.
>> No. 15016 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 12:46 pm
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>>15011

>I suspect I have it myself,

How does it manifest itself in your romantic relationships? I'm genuinely curious, because I have been told by various ex girlfriends that I was kind of a distant person, and that they never quite managed to figure me out.

One lass even said to me when we broke up, "I've spent the last two and a half years with you, but I still feel sometimes like I don't know you at all".

Which are all pretty standard, classic schizoid telltale signs.
>> No. 15017 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 2:01 pm
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>>15015

I'm sorry to bring your morning down, especially if you are FoundTinderOnHisLassesPhoneLad.

I made no connection between >>15012 and that lad.

Also let it be known that I am neither particularly useful nor an idiot.

If you feel like someone has been abusive towards you, or has abused your trust by going through your phone, or abused your trust or your love in other ways, then perhaps make a thread where we might discuss it in a productive way rather than through rather cryptic messages on a /news/ thread about bizarre news that has spiraled now out of control.

Perhaps a /b/ thread on "The ethics of social media privacy in the digital age" or something.

Personally I get upset as hell when my missus goes through my phone because she always finds something to upset her, and it cuts the other way too. But as the old idiom goes, "eavesdroppers never hear any good of themselves", and this really is a discussion for another thread and in fact I forward motion to freeze this thread and start a Bizarre News 2.0 thread purely for the posting and very brief discussion of bad news, do I hear a second?
>> No. 15018 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 2:14 pm
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>>15017
Tbh I have been sitting here feeling miserable contemplating whether or not to make an /emo/ thread. Thanks for your concern. Its appreciated even though Im about to randomly stop replying and never come back. For the record I could never find anything on someone else's phone because I'd never look at someone else's phone. The idea that anyone would is both terrifying and enraging to me.
>> No. 15019 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 2:25 pm
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>>15016

> How does it manifest itself in your romantic relationships? I'm genuinely curious, because I have been told by various ex girlfriends that I was kind of a distant person, and that they never quite managed to figure me out.

Being a serial long term monogamist I don't have a lot of exes to compare that to, I've had the same bag for life for the last twelve years now, for example. I don't think she knows me as well as my first girlfriend does, or did, or will ever.

When I'm single I miss having someone around to have lunch with and someone to watch a shitty program on iPlayer with before bed and someone to do something with at the weekends and that's it. The rest of the time I'm happy enough on the internet or in my kindle. I never got into video games but I abuse computers in other ways.

I don't really maintain friendships, I keep my thoughts and feelings to myself, and people quite often think I'm either an intimidating cunt, a moody autist or just a general shitebag because I don't maintain constant contact with people. I have friends who I've known for nigh on twenty years now and we exchange the odd email or whatsapp message every few weeks or months.

Anyway this is rambling. The concise answer is that yes my missus does "joke" (although to what level of "ha ha only serious" I don't know) that I'm only playing a twelve year long game with her turning on the different personalities depending on what I want out of her.

Other than that I tick every practically every symptom in the DSM-V (although like most menks and psychiatrists alike I preferred the DSM-IV definition of almost everything):


- Neither desires nor enjoys close relationships, including being part of a family. [I went two years without even emailing my mum.]

- Almost always chooses solitary activities. [Internet, kindle, gym, only group activities I do are Judo and that and even then I have to (legally prescribed) benzo myself up to be around other people]

- Has little, if any, interest in having sexual experiences with another person. [ I don't fit this one, or I've changed, I spent most of my life wanting to get fucked up rather than fuck, I now regret all the fanny I passed on because I passed out]

- Takes pleasure in few, if any, activities. [ Tick ]

- Lacks close friends or confidants other than first-degree relatives. [ 100% tick]

- Appears indifferent to the praise or criticism of others. [Tick]

- Shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affectivity [Totally I've had girls ask me if I'm gay before because I wasn't involved in chatting them up, I was just happier in my head than talking to some vapid bint.]

Anyway, thanks Dr, I expect my certificate of mental loonyness in the mail soon along with my council house and long term sickness benefits.

See how we've fucked up this thread? Not even I could stop myself.
>> No. 15020 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 4:50 pm
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>>15019

I see your symptoms are pretty much the same as mine. Give or take.

The weird thing is, a lot of schizoids are quite content with the way they lead their lives, and it doesn't occur to them that they are missing out on a lot of things. I am that way too.

I've just never been somebody who wanted to get involved knee deep into all the shit that normal people deal with. All the drama of friendships, numerous romantic affairs and one night stands, moving in with somebody, getting married or divorced, children with different partners, or what-have-you. I am at an age where any number of those experiences have happened to some of my friends, but somehow I just never ended up in a lot of those situations. I have always kept my distance to those things.

I have friends and I have had my share of romantic partners, but it's all sort of on a level of just sampling different experiences in life, but never opting for the full meal. You know, like somebody who only puts one small bite of something on his plate at a buffet, and then moves on to other dishes, of which he then also only puts about a spoonful on his plate.

I have come to accept myself that way, and even though my circle of friends has become smaller in recent years and I have had fewer romantic or sexual encounters, I honestly don't feel like my life is missing something. If anything, I'm kind of happy that it means I get to spend more time by myself and wandering around my own secret world inside my head.

My therapist has told me that she is concerned that I will look back one day and realise that I've wasted precious time in my life not taking on all the experiences of "regular" people, but she also thinks that in the end, I am a functioning adult, and that my schizoid tendencies just make me "a bit more peculiar than other people". She said the need to address those issues would only come into play if I myself was unhappy with my life. Which I'm not, as strange as that may seem to other people.

Also, it runs in our family on my dad's side. Several of my relatives tick all the boxes of schizoid personality disorder. I am the only one that has been diagnosed, but when I told my mum in confidence a while ago, she seemed kind of startled by it and said, "I've been thinking for years that your dad's whole family has that!".
>> No. 15021 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 8:05 pm
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>>14994
For context, we'd been dating for about 6 months at that point so it wasn't a committed long-term relationship. I knew she used a whole bunch of dating apps before we met, though we didn't meet through one. So in all likelihood it was either a random message from months ago or one of those random "hey we're still here ;)" notifications the app autogenerates every now and then to get you to interact with it.

In hindsight she wasn't a very nice person: arrogant, selfish and emotionally manipulative. But I don't believe she would be a cheater. I've dated a cheater before and the difference is that they're cowards, too scared to end a relationship when it's time to move on.

Ironically a little while after that I realised I also had Tinder still installed on my phone, so I got rid of it. I mentioned to her that I'd been through my phone and got rid of a bunch of crap I didn't use any more like Tinder and she got a bit pissy with me for still having it, with massive irony blinkers on apparently. Being somewhat conflict avoidant I decided not to escalate it into an argument by calling her double standard though.
>> No. 15022 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 8:52 pm
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>>15020

> My therapist has told me that she is concerned that I will look back one day and realise that I've wasted precious time in my life

Now we're into therapy land I'm going to confess an experience I had at cub scout camp when I was 8 and no it's not the one where I was serial bummed by the scoutmaster .

Basically I was miserable all weekend and wanted to go home, I was resentful that I'd been sent to camp, resentful to be forced to be amongst people I didn't want to be, and resentful I wasn't at home doing what I want to do.

On the final day of camp I finally forgot all that and started to just let go and enjoy myself, but by then the time was gone, the weekend over and I'd just wasted my time cutting off my own snotty nose to spite my face.

I realized, right then and there as a child of that age, that I had a very real chance of doing the same thing with my entire life; living with resentment, hate, anger, angst, apathy, denial and self-distancing and then waking up when I was 80 and realizing I'd pissed my entire life up the wall being moody just to be moody. Being a sad cunt just to be a sad cunt. "I miss the comfort in being sad" as the old song goes.

The older and older I get the more I'm convinced that this is my destiny. I have occasional moments of fleeting happiness but mainly I just feel so fucking disconnected from everything that I might as well be on venus breathing methane and strutting through the marple rain for all the connection I feel to the world of the profane.
>> No. 15023 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 9:07 pm
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>>15021

> I've dated a cheater before and the difference is that they're cowards, too scared to end a relationship when it's time to move on.

Women, much more than men, tend to stay in unhappy relationships for just as long as there's nobody else on the horizon that they can switch saddles for. And indeed some women will then maintain a secret affair at the same time that they're still for all intents and purposes together with their old partner.

One of my mates was living together with his girlfriend of nearly five years, and then one night she just sat him down and said there was something she needed to talk to him about. You see, she had joined a choir just to have something to do on her own one night every week, and she then fell in love with the choir teacher. They had been having an affair that went on for three months before she decided to tell him.

She had the perfect alibi, they always went to have sex at her choir teacher's place every Tuesday night after choir practice, and at weekends when my mate had other things to do.

Again, this went on for three months. She did eventually find the courage to tell him, but you couldn't help wondering why she let the whole thing go on for three months without coming clean to him about it, whilst my mate wasn't exactly blissfully unaware, but was still left in the dark as to what was really going on. He knew that something was up because she became increasingly distant and they almost hadn't had sex at all in those three months. But you still don't expect to be cheated on like that.
>> No. 15024 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 9:22 pm
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>>15022
Last month my son went camping with Scouts for a couple of nights on a rock climbing and abseiling trip. His soap, towel, toothbrush and anything else which had anything to do with looking clean and presentable were completely untouched. He struggled to find them but had no problem whatsoever in locating the bit of money we'd given him for the camp site shop there.
>> No. 15025 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 9:25 pm
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>>15022

>living with resentment, hate, anger, angst, apathy, denial and self-distancing and then waking up when I was 80 and realizing I'd pissed my entire life up the wall being moody just to be moody.

I, for one, expect my apathy to last into my 80s, at which point I will then probably not even care that I've pissed my life up the wall by other people's standards. What do they know.

I'm in early middle age now as it is, and I have realised that I can either moan about all the lost opportunity, or I can decide to just live with it and accept that as my life so far. Again, most of it is other people's standards as to how you should live your life.

See it this way. An old goat herder in sub-Saharan Africa will only have known the wide grassy plains around his village all his life. He will have spent his life herding goats, maybe he never even learned to read, he will have gotten married to his wife at 16 while she may or not have been only twelve at the time and have had several kids, and that will have been it. That goat herder will never have seen the world, probably never even gone on the Internet or whatever. While during the same time, a person in Britain will have flown across the world and visited dozens of exotic locations, they will have owned several cars and houses, have a big flatscreen TV in their livingroom and a summer house in the Costas together with his second wife.

So who, I ask you, has lived the more fulfilled life? The life of the person in Britain may look many times more exciting, but maybe the quiet of the vast African grasslands was exciting to our goat herder in a way that all the Western city dweller amenities never possibly could be.

You see where I am going with this. In the end, what counts isn't that you tick all the boxes of what people think you should do with, and in your life. What counts is that you yourself can look back one day and think that your life wasn't wasted. And that is something that doesn't necessarily hinge on having done all the things that everybody else seems to have done, often "just because" they were things you were expected to do.
>> No. 15026 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 9:45 pm
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>>15024
I'm a bit thick; what's your point? Your son never went rock climbing while he was there? Your son is a dirty fecker? Your son lied about the whole trip and actually went somewhere else?
>> No. 15027 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 9:49 pm
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>>15026
Scouts.
>> No. 15028 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 9:50 pm
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>>15026
>TEENAGE BOY LACKS PERSONAL HYGIENE SHOCKER
>> No. 15029 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 9:53 pm
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>>15028
So his son is a dirty fecker? OK. So what does this have to do with >>15022's post about wasting time?
>> No. 15030 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 10:01 pm
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>>15029
Scouts.
>> No. 15031 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 3:07 am
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>>15025

I'm in a bit of a rush to nip out but I just wanted to pick up on

> that doesn't necessarily hinge on having done all the things that everybody else seems to have done, often "just because" they were things you were expected to do.

I feel that a lot of what people do, from university, to marriage, to kids, to relationships, some drugs (especially alcohol, weed, cocaine, and other parrty drugs) and even oftentimes sex itself is just driven by doing whatever it is that you think that you're supposed to be doing.

I also I feel like that is something that is getting worsened as time goes on and the increasingly encroaching reach of social media drives us all to want to both A) project the most "impressive" image of ourselves possible and B) suffer the most impressive images of others and feel forced to emulate similar in a kind of feedback loop.
>> No. 15034 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 12:39 pm
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>>15031

>and the increasingly encroaching reach of social media drives us all to want to both A) project the most "impressive" image of ourselves possible and B) suffer the most impressive images of others and feel forced to emulate similar in a kind of feedback loop.

On the one hand, oneupmanship has existed for as long as humans have been around. People have always felt a need to outdo each other. Then again, you have a point in that it's so easy these days to toot your own horn over social media and present yourself as the greatest thing ever.

I was a teenlad at a time when the Internet for all intents and purposes did not exist in everyday life, and then in my early 20s, it only just started being that thing you dialled yourself into on a 56K modem via your parents' bulky beige desktop computer at home with a clunky CRT monitor on top. Mobile phones were increasingly around, but in the late 80s, they had been just ludicrously expensive status symbols for wannabe yuppie gits, and in the first half of the 90s, as a typical pupil or student, you still had no way of realistically affording one for yourself. Also, people keep forgetting these days, they were really only mobile telephones even in the late 90s. Calling somebody (or texting them) was for a long time pretty much the only thing you were able to do with them. My perception is that phone calls themselves have been falling out of fashion lately with all the other means of communication you have today on a standard smartphone.

I don't envy millennials these days who have all those social media with a good dozen platforms on the Internet where you can satisfy your inner attention whore to your heart's content and post anything from the shoes you've just bought to the poo you had today. To me it has no redeeming qualities whatsoever, and only creates noise that drowns out actual old-fashioned communication between people.

I have never had a facebook, Twitter or Instagram account, and I don't plan on ever getting one. The people I'm close to, I keep in touch with via telephone or text messages. If I want to meet new people, I can join any number of real life activities, like the cooking class I took this winter or my local Rover/MG club where I am a member. I meet people there that I can have one-on-one, face-to-face chats with in real life, and I have been able to make friends there just as some people now pretend to do online. I don't see why I would need social media in my life.
>> No. 15035 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 2:14 pm
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>>15034

> Then again, you have a point in that it's so easy these days to toot your own horn over social media and present yourself as the greatest thing ever.

It's a double edged sword, and thus a dangerous one; you are given a way to present yourself in a solely favourably light and also given only the most well curated image of the life of other people.

E.g. I only follow people I at least have some kind of irl contact with on Instagram (the only social media I use, for various reasons I shan't bother getting into here) and there are people I know who have the most awful dejected lives who look like they live like party stars on Instagram - because they spend hours posing and pouting making sure they're taking their photos in the right places, doing the right things, even if they're only there to take a photo and fuck off.

Yes, oneupmanship has existed since we were dragging the carcasses of wild whatever the fuck sheep were before they were sheep (some kind of goat?) back to our caves but the people in the nearby caves (or huts or whatever) also saw the days where you caught fuck all or where your urr-missus gave you a right bollocking for drinking all the special berry juice and not going hunting at all.

Social Media has rapidly accelerated how and expanded the ways in which we can present and be presented with only the best view of lives, which in turn leads to a massively exaggerated "the grass in always greener" syndrome.

I suppose all I'm saying is that social media is accelerating an already toxic human condition.

> If I want to meet new people, I can join any number of real life activities, like the cooking class I took this winter or my local Rover/MG club where I am a member.

You sound like a much more functional human being than I am. I do not make friends and haven't really since university age, point blank. I think I'm at an age where even people who I meet at group activities (of which I do few) also have real life commitments outside those groups (jobs, relationships, marriages, kids) which prevent them from meeting up (or even being interested in doing so) outside of those group events.

I am currently trying to remedy this by setting up first dates with university age unattached (21-25-29) lasses which I'm sure will, if nothing else, provide you all with some much needed hilarity in one thread or another around here.
>> No. 15037 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 3:05 pm
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>>15035

>and there are people I know who have the most awful dejected lives who look like they live like party stars on Instagram - because they spend hours posing and pouting making sure they're taking their photos in the right places, doing the right things, even if they're only there to take a photo and fuck off.

That is certainly true. Much like celebrities to whose lifestyles a lot of us aspire to, as do incidentally a lot of those Instagram wannabes, you ever only see excerpts from a person's life. You don't get to witness their bad moments (except for the abhorrent calamity of somebody serving them a lukewarm moccacino at their favourite hipster café, cue a pointless Twitter rant about the incident). You don't get to see days when they are told by their boss that they are useless deadweights who will face redundancy if they don't get their arse up. You don't witness moments when their boyfriend - or girlfriend - tells them that they are the biggest fucking bore in bed they've ever been with. No, you are presented a perfect picture of somebody who leads a spotless life where everything is just hunky dory.

As a tangent, it's also one reason why many women especially are unhappy with their quite ordinary lives. Women in particular are much more susceptible to believing the perfect pictures of other people's lives that they see in the media. And then feeling inferior because they are made to believe that their own lives don't measure up.

I've never been unhappy with my life because I was never an aristocratic millionaire male supermodel football player movie star with more money than I could ever spend and more hot romantic affairs than I had fingers and toes. I know quite well that that's a fantasy world that isn't attainable for the other 99.9 percent. But women seem to be much more ready to believe that what they read in the tabloids or see on Made in Chelsea can serve as some sort of gauge for their own success in life.
>> No. 15038 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 4:15 pm
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>>15037

I'm not going to quote the rest of your post because I agree with all of it and I really think we're on exactly the same page here. People project "perfect" views of their quite ordinary lives and susceptible people (and I'll admit that I have been prone to being susceptible myself) can feel some kind of depression / dejection/ general misery because we're not living up to this great lifestyle everyone else seems to be.

> I've never been unhappy with my life because I was never an aristocratic millionaire male supermodel football player movie star with more money than I could ever spend and more hot romantic affairs than I had fingers and toes. I know quite well that that's a fantasy world that isn't attainable for the other 99.9 percent. But women seem to be much more ready to believe that what they read in the tabloids or see on Made in Chelsea can serve as some sort of gauge for their own success in life.

I will counter this with the most edgy teenlad thing a middle age man can counter anything with, a quote from fight club (the novel):

“We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off.”
>> No. 15040 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 5:37 pm
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>>15038

Very well put, including your apt Fight Club quote there.

It's not unimportant to note that that movie came out nearly 20 years ago, the novel being a few years older than that. Not so much has changed since the mid-90s, and you could probably just swap out "We've all been raised on television..." with "We've all been raised on social media...".

I would very much like to see a sequel to Fight Club, or rather a reimagined version that sets the film's manhood in crisis theme against the backdrop of the social media revolution of the last ten years.
>> No. 15065 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 7:59 pm
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>>15040

An irc friend and I used to imagine an updated Withnail and I with mentions of tinder and Reddit ("You get upvotes, why don't I get any upvotes?", "My manager hasn't got me a tinder match in weeks, bastard must have died").

Of course in order to avoid ruining both films they'd have to explore similar themes while having completely different plots and characters that are not simply cut outs from a roman à clef.

For example, Will Self's Dorian did a fantastic job or re-imagining The picture of Dorian Grey in the age of AIDS and Ecstasy without it being in any way the same book.

Simply renaming Tyler Durden "Taylor Burton" and having him say "you are not your tinder match count, you are not your instagram photos, you are not your goddamn reddit upvote count" would just ruin everything for everyone (with an IQ over 80 anyway, unless you did it as a fucking comedy).
>> No. 15066 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 8:37 pm
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>> No. 15067 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 8:51 pm
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>>15065

> "you are not your tinder match count, you are not your instagram photos, you are not your goddamn reddit upvote count"

That is actually a pretty true and clever line though. Perfect for a generation of wandering smartphone zombies who would rather hit a lamppost head on than look up from their screen for the tiniest of moments.

On my flight back from Gran Canaria last year, there was actually an early 20something lass sitting about four rows in front of me (a bit the dolled up type, loads of makeup, long painted nails, white leather coat, possibly vaguely Russian), and while we were sitting there waiting for the plane to taxi and take off, she was incessantly taking selfies of herself in her seat. Holding her phone in the air and photographing herself at kind of a downward angle, which meant everyone in the ten rows behind her witnessed her taking what must have been twenty different pictures all in a row, each time inspecting every picture closely and for some reason deciding she wasn't happy with it and proceeding to take another one almost exactly like it.

It was only after some rude but quite hilarious comments from a chap in the row behind me (imagine a North London working class accent) that she stopped.
>> No. 15069 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 8:58 pm
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>>15067
Thanks for leaving out the chap's hilarious comments.
>> No. 15070 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 9:08 pm
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>>15067
How dare she take photographs of herself! Thank goodness there was some hero there to stop it.
>> No. 15071 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 9:08 pm
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>>15069

Well the girl was visibly fiddling with her hair a whole lot, running her fingers through it the whole time, and the lad said something like, "That's not how you get jizz out of your hair, you have to comb it out" ... or something like that... I was only listening with one ear while reading my newspaper.

I then asked the lad next to me what the chap behind us had just said when I became aware of the aghast laughs of the other people around us, but he refused to repeat it.
>> No. 15075 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 9:43 pm
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>>15065

Fight Club was also the first recorded occurrence of the concept of (special) snowflakes.

It'd be interesting to see how they would deal with that in a reimagining of the original Fight Club, now that we live in a world of special snowflakes and safe spaces.
>> No. 15078 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 10:10 pm
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>>15075

It was a somewhat prophetic book in a lot of ways, and holds up well as contemporary fiction considering that it was written twenty-two years ago.

As >>15040 cleverly points out, you could swap out a few words, use cellphones rather than land lines, and you'd have a film (or a novel) that could be happening right here in 2018 rather than 1996.

Certain pieces of work are very much of their time while others manage to almost skirt culture and focus upon humanity, which itself never really changes. I think that Fight Club is one of those novels.
>> No. 15083 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 12:31 am
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>>15078

>you could swap out a few words, use cellphones rather than land lines, and you'd have a film (or a novel) that could be happening right here in 2018 rather than 1996. 

I would even go as far as saying that themes of alter egos and imagined parallel dream worlds are even more relevant today than they were 22 years ago.
>> No. 15086 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 12:21 pm
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>>15075

Apparently, a (Bollywood?) remake of Fight Club has been done, but it earned quite poor reviews.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0456413/
>> No. 15092 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 6:14 pm
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I remember seeing this on acrobat.
>> No. 15093 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 6:18 pm
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>>15075

I thought the concept of "snowflake" now is more about how fragile these people seem to be, not uniqueness.
>> No. 15094 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 6:19 pm
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>>15092

That wordfilter seems a bit random. I'd read that and think Adobe Acrobat? A PDF?
>> No. 15095 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 6:23 pm
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https://www.esquire.com/entertainment/books/news/a52667/chuck-palahniuk-snowflake-alt-right-origin/

>In the 1970s snowflake was a disparaging term for a white man or for a black man who was seen as acting white. It was also used as a slang term for cocaine. But before either of those it was used for a time with a very particular political meaning. In Missouri in the early 1860s, a "Snowflake" was a person who was opposed to the abolition of slavery—the implication of the name being that such people valued white people over black people. The Snowflakes hoped slavery would survive the country's civil war, and were contrasted with two other groups.
>> No. 15096 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 6:31 pm
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>>15092

https://www.esquire.com/entertainment/books/news/a52550/chuck-palahniuk-alt-right-snowflake-fight-club/

Apparently Palahniuk approves of calling liberals snowflakes, so that doesn't sound like a gay guy mocking fragile masculinity. He seems like someone who just happens to be gay and doesn't base his identity around it in a huge way.
>> No. 15098 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 7:19 pm
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>>15093

I think "special snowflake" (sic) really refers to people who are objectively really every bit like the rest of the population, but they have led themselves to believe that just like two snowflakes under the microscope aren't the same, they too are different from everybody else. In ways that are really minute to the more rational observer, but to the snowflake person concerned, it will appear like they are worlds apart from everybody else. And that is then overamplified and used as justification for being treated differently from everybody.

But I guess the understanding of more right wing and FOX News leaning people has become that "snowflake" refers to a quality that is somewhere between expecting special treatment and being just all around delicate and incapable of dealing with criticism and contrasting opinion.

Which is then also where safe spaces admittedly do come in, because safe spaces are centered around the notion that everybody deserves a (physical) space where their preconceived ideas and beliefs aren't challenged, and where everything that is not in line with those ideas and beliefs is regarded as an existential threat to that person and is deemed as having no right to exist.

I have to say I loathe right wing propaganda and FOX News and that whole microcosm, but I think that special snowflakes and their quite questionable expectation of safe spaces is a real thing, and something that will not change society for the better.

People need to be exposed to contrasting ideas. They need to be exposed to criticism, even hurtful criticism. Because that's the only way you will learn to be a robust, functioning adult who isn't going to break down crying everytime things don't go their way. The world isn't a nice place. It's hostile, it's competitive, peopl don't always like you. Some even hate you. There will be setbacks, and you can fail miserably in this world, with nobody else to pick you back up.

It's ok if you can't deal with that as a ten year old. But if you want to call yourself a true adult, then eventually you are going to have to learn those fundamental lessons.
>> No. 15110 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 11:56 pm
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>>15098

I'm not saying that's wrong but it seems mildly contradictory that the definition of a special snowflake is someone who thinks he is a special snowflake but is not.
>> No. 15111 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 12:03 am
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It's always struck me how these alternative subcultures, especially in the modern Internet echo chamber context, seem to provide cover for absolute nutters.

I mean any rational person can see immediately what an utterly, stupendously barmy idea it is to bad drag queens from gay pride. But somewhere, somehow, there's a legitimate mentalist with enough support to push it through. I'm obviously assuming a lot here, but I just can't fathom it being anything other than the kind of person who is seriously and obviously unhinged, with a chip the size of Devon on their shoulder, but uses the inherent tolerance and inclusiveness of the LGBTQAIMAOLMSN community to deflect any attention over it.

I think that's a big part of why the whole identity politics gig is becoming so divisive these days. When your main shtick is defending people from prejudice you're going to end up inadvertently shielding a lot of outright head cases too.
>> No. 15112 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 12:10 am
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>>15110

I'm reasonably sure that is, in fact, the point.
>> No. 15113 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 12:20 am
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>>15111

I think the route of the problem is that the underlying philosophy it is built on the premises, that the status quo is always wrong and that feelings are a type of truth that can't be invalidated, and a type of truth that over rides facts and logic, because facts and logic can be very hurtful and unkind. When you have that as the core premise you are really handing the keys of the asylum over to the inmates on day one.
>> No. 15114 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 1:30 am
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>>15112

- Snowflake:

>I'm special. I'm not like everybody else. I deserve special and preferential treatment.


- everybody else:

>Sod off and realise already that you're just like everybody, feckin snowflake.
>> No. 15115 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 6:39 am
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>>15111
>the modern Internet echo chamber

Are we an echo chamber?
>> No. 15116 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 7:00 am
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>>15115

I don't think we are. There's definitely not a consensus here on many issues, from race, to politics, to biscuits, as evidenced by the frequent debates/cunt-offs. There's an argument to be made that the mods are all roughly aligned in their views and that directs discussion somewhat, as we do tend to ban the more forceful opinions on race and such, though I do believe we try to keep the floor open to everyone who can be measured in their arguments on either side of a great many issues.

There are certain imageboards that thrive on creating an insular, tribal community, there are boards dedicated to paedos, who comfort each other and protest their actions as innocent or welcome. There are chans and forums dedicated to creating communities of white supremacists, who reinforce each other's prejudices with stories of other races being bastard criminals and such, and of course there's the famous incels, born from places like 4chan, characterising themselves as basement dwellers and such, consoling each other that they're not alone, only serving to sink people further into dysfunction.

I like to think we avoid all of that. Perhaps we're an echo chamber for the mundane reality of British life, maybe our strong views on tea and sheds might be seen as insular to those who prefer coffee and garages. But fuck them, because they're the enemy, and it's us against them.
>> No. 15120 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 7:41 am
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>>15116
>those who prefer coffee and garages

No prizes for guessing what I'm doing on this Saturday morning. I'll show myself the exit, lads.
>> No. 15121 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 8:17 am
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>>15120
I bet it was a cheeky garage-wank.
>> No. 15122 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 8:20 am
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>>15121

Or a coffee wank.
>> No. 15123 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 8:36 am
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>>15122
No, that was me.
>> No. 15124 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 8:42 am
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Let me guess. Coffee-Mate is actually spunk and one of you is going to weave a vivid tale of how people are actually creaming their coffee with the ejaculate of some minor celebrity, like Noel Edmonds.
>> No. 15125 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 8:47 am
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And it's no longer Noel's House Party, it's Noel's Bukkake Party and instead of Crinkly Bottom they're all ejaculating into a Coffee-Mate container whilst Noel watches on with a delirious grin on his face whilst uttering sweet nothings.

I bet one of you is going to post something like that. You know what? You lads make me fucking sick. You're depraved.
>> No. 15126 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 8:50 am
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>>15125
I'm sure that's too depraved even for Jim'll paint it.
>> No. 15127 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 12:44 pm
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>>15125

> You know what? You lads make me fucking sick. You're depraved.

You are doing it to yourself. Nobody else uttered these nonsensical ideas but you.
>> No. 15128 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 1:08 pm
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>>15127

I think that might have been his joke, M25.
>> No. 15129 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 4:52 pm
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>>15116
>There's definitely not a consensus here on many issues ... as evidenced by the frequent debates/cunt-offs
That isn't what consensus means. Consensus is general agreement, and there is that, even if there are a couple of contrasting opinions here and there.

I dispute your idea that other imageboards create 'insular communities' that 'reinforce each other's prejudices' in a way that .gs doesn't.

Look at this thread for instance. There's 'general agreement' all over it, ironically even on the point that "people need to be exposed to contrasting ideas".

Look at this point:
>any rational person can see immediately what an utterly, stupendously barmy idea it is to bad drag queens from gay pride
That's a pretty strong opinion. Apparently "any rational person" should take this view. But no-one here has disagreed with it. And if they did, apparently they are a "legitimate mentalist", "seriously and obviously unhinged".

And yet
>I do believe we try to keep the floor open to everyone who can be measured in their arguments on either side of a great many issues

OK...
>> No. 15131 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 1:36 am
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>>15129

Perhaps you're right. It's hard to tell from the inside, sometimes, and I've been on this website since the start. I'll preface this by saying that perhaps I'm too close to the 'hive mind' of the board to realise it's an echo chamber.

I don't know if the fact that everyone seems to agree about the drag queen thing is evidence that we don't allow for other's opinions - only one man proclaimed an alternative viewpoint as legitimately mental. I'd welcome a conflicting view, especially from someone closer to the issue than us, because echo chamber or not, a thread full of people nodding their heads at each other is boring.

Just because people have strong opinions, that doesn't mean other opinions aren't allowed. They may be argued with, but that's sort of the point. If everyone just stated their opinion and everyone else just said "well done on your opinion" then that's a useless forum, really.

Just to clarify, when I said

>I do believe we try to keep the floor open to everyone who can be measured in their arguments on either side of a great many issues

I was still talking about the moderation. Everyone's free to say something like the bloke you're quoting, without the censoring hand of moderation. Perhaps it's the word 'measured' that I used that's the problem, as I accept your example isn't particularly measured, so I take that word back, but everything else stands.
>> No. 15133 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 4:51 pm
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>>15131
>I'd welcome a conflicting view, especially from someone closer to the issue than us
Sure, so would I, but I imagine the kind of person who would really disagree with the board's consensus on the drag queen thing would be put off engaging in the first place by being branded a seriously unhinged mentalist.

And you might call that sensitivity or generalising, but I wonder how many posters here bother to engage with social justice types after their views were branded racist or misogynistic or the like by only one or two of them? They'd probably think there was no point doing that either. So they'd come to .gs and complain about it instead.

I appreciate you were talking about the moderation, but so-called echo chambers don't begin and end with moderation.
>> No. 15134 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 5:27 pm
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I think this board in particular has much more of a monoculture than most other (bigger) imageboards.

If we just take The Other Place for an example, you see wildly different communities developing around the different boards. There's crossover of course, but a majority of the boards will tell someone to fuck off for pouting /pol/ shite, and even furries, the internet equivalent of the Jewish diaspora, have found themselves a little niche to settle in.

Here, it's more like we just have a handful of Guardian readers and a handful of Mail readers who ocasionally clash.
>> No. 15135 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 11:51 pm
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>>15131
> only one man proclaimed an alternative viewpoint as legitimately mental.

Did you just assume their gender???
>> No. 15138 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 2:23 pm
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>>15135
See what I'm talking about? You openly wonder why no-one wants to come and discuss trans issues and then you have cunts like this who think the whole thing is one big laugh.
>> No. 15139 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 2:28 pm
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>>15138

If you really cared about progressive thinking you wouldn't use micro aggressions like feminine gendered swear words you concern trolling shitlord.
>> No. 15140 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 2:50 pm
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>>15139
Lampooning SJW logic is so tiresome.
>> No. 15141 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 3:24 pm
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>>15138


What are we supposed to do? If he was banned for being offensive then there'd still be no discussion.

Like it or not, internet discussion includes this sort of absolutism. It's certainly not board wide, and as you can see nobody is stopping you or anyone else from disagreeing with it.
>> No. 15142 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 5:21 pm
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>>15141

For the record, the poster of >>15135 does not care in any way about gender issues, is not an absolutist, is a cunt (but for other reasons) but found it immensely funny that >>15131 didn't think, in the midst of such a discussion, to simply use the word "person" instead of "man" and pointed it out in the "funniest" way they could think of at that point.

There sure are a lot of Touchy Tracies out there on this board these last couple of weeks.
>> No. 15143 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 5:45 pm
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>>15142
>There sure are a lot of Touchy Tracies out there on this board these last couple of weeks.

Probably their time of the month.
>> No. 15144 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 5:46 pm
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>>15140

Only because it's so easily done.

Lad of the original "properly unhinged mentalist" post here. I feel I should clarify, I only used terms like that because I was struggling to otherwise express the concept of someone with legitimate mental health/personality disorders but just sort of gets a pass, and maybe considered a bit of an arsehole at times. The function of the LGBTQ etc community to protect people from legitimate and real everyday prejudice is totally admirable.

But it's particularly susceptible to extremists in an ironic kind of way. The trouble is, once you start on down the line of reasoning behind the social justice concept (and just left wing thought in general) it's very easy to get carried away, because there practically is no logical end point. Now, I'm the kind of lad who had a political awakening earlier than most. I spent a good few years banging on about how we should all live in a communist utopia by now to all my mates, who just wanted to get hammered and probably found me very tiresome, but now they're the ones sat on Facebook reposting half-baked Marxism from acrobat. I think there's a firebrand phase most people go through when they start thinking about all this stuff for themselves.

The feedback loop created by our current system of social establishments just causes a lot of issues, basically. It no longer accommodates moderation, and what used to be called "common sense" in the bad old days where everyone smoked and beat non-cis folk to death in the street for a laugh.
>> No. 15146 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 6:07 pm
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>>15141
Have you even been reading the discussion above? We've explicitly been saying it's not about moderation.
>> No. 15149 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 6:16 pm
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>>15146

Right, so then we're just taking individual statements in single posts to be the litmus test of the board? Were actively having an argument with both sides present here, I fail to see the monoculture. Otherwise you (or whoever said it above) is just unhappy someone is disagreeing with them in strong terms. Which sounds like a you want an echo chamber, just one that agrees with you.
>> No. 15150 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 6:27 pm
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>>15149
Curse you for revealing my evil plan! I thought no-one would work out that pointing out that hackneyed jokes at the expense of people who hold particular views will discourage them posting here is actually an attempt to fashion the board to my dastardly whims.
>> No. 15151 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 6:44 pm
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>>15150

You seem to have avoided addressing my post in any real way. Again, you're quite welcome to post what you like here, but a poor argument will be pounced upon on this site no matter what opinion it represents.
>> No. 15154 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 11:30 pm
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>>15151
Funny that, because you've consistently avoided addressing my overarching point.
>> No. 15156 Anonymous
15th May 2018
Tuesday 12:14 am
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>>15154

What exactly did I miss?
>> No. 15158 Anonymous
15th May 2018
Tuesday 1:23 am
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>>15156
That anyone who isn't a white cis male is a legit mentalist.

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