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>> No. 12221 Anonymous
6th February 2017
Monday 6:09 pm
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Evening, lads.

I'm thinking of having a go at converting vodka into gin. Have any of you tried it?



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>> No. 12222 Anonymous
6th February 2017
Monday 7:10 pm
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Sort of. I've steeped juniper, cardamom, and cinnamon into vodka and soda and set it with agar agar for what I masterfully called gin jelly. It tasted like christmas.

Chocolate Truffles_f.jpg
>> No. 12146 Anonymous
19th November 2016
Saturday 3:33 pm
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Afternoon, lads.

I could do with some chocolate recommendations. My Dad is one of the most difficult people to buy presents for, because he doesn't really do much beyond sitting on his arse watching TV all day, so at Christmas I'll usually end up spending around £40 on my Mum whereas all he'll get is a couple of cheap DVDs and either a Toblerone, Thorntons toffee or a large bar of Cadbury's whole nut.

This year I thought I might push the boat out on the chocolate front but I'm a bit clueless, really. I've tried Hotel Chocolat and didn't think much of it. Any tips would be appreciated.

Thanks, lads.
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>> No. 12159 Anonymous
22nd November 2016
Tuesday 3:33 am
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I find myself reguarly eatting samples of soap nowdays. It just looks so tasty. :(

I honestly think there is a market for a sweet shop that sells food tha looks andt tastes like how these soaps should taste.
>> No. 12160 Anonymous
22nd November 2016
Tuesday 6:57 am
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I'd buy fudge, but I wouldn't trust someone selling chocolate at a market. They'd probably melt down chocolate from Aldi, set it in their own moulds and add a 400% mark-up.
>> No. 12213 Anonymous
3rd February 2017
Friday 7:24 pm
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But Aldi chocolate is some of the best around and it'd be worth the extra to avoid the shame of shopping in Aldi.
>> No. 12214 Anonymous
3rd February 2017
Friday 7:46 pm
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That's exactly Lush's plan though - to convince you that their products are good enough to eat. They are plugging the market you suggest, directly.
>> No. 12219 Anonymous
4th February 2017
Saturday 12:31 am
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There is palmer's coco butter moisturiser that smells obscenely like high-grade lindt chocolate. It's ridiculously pungent after you've sweat a bit and you feel uncomfortably craving chocolate.

>> No. 12161 Anonymous
29th November 2016
Tuesday 9:59 pm
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Two days ago I went cold turkey on pepsi max. I must've drunk on average at least a litre a day for the last four years. Shit can't be good for you.
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>> No. 12173 Anonymous
30th November 2016
Wednesday 3:52 pm
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I drink a lot of sugar free coke as well but unlike OP I'm not really concerned about the health effects. The issues appear to be:

a) acidity (which I believe is proven to decay teeth and upset gut flora)
b) artificial sweeteners (which aren't proven to do much of anything beyond give you a sweet tooth and make you fat, but I'm thin as a rake).
>> No. 12174 Anonymous
30th November 2016
Wednesday 4:20 pm
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Your body needs sugar. The sweetener make the body think it's getting some sugar, and when none is forthcoming you end up hungry.

FWIW, within the first few pages of Google, only one result claimed outright it was a myth, and that was the Daily Mail, so make of that what you will.
>> No. 12175 Anonymous
30th November 2016
Wednesday 7:00 pm
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> and make you fat

This has been really perplexing me. I'd put good money on my diet being one of the best amongst my peer group but I'm 83kg at 174cm and it refuses to go down.
>> No. 12176 Anonymous
30th November 2016
Wednesday 7:03 pm
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Then you're eating too much. Control the portion size.
>> No. 12177 Anonymous
30th November 2016
Wednesday 7:25 pm
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>FWIW, within the first few pages of Google, only one result claimed outright it was a myth, and that was the Daily Mail, so make of that what you will.
It's contentious and under-researched, any remotely honest reporting will reflect that.

Whatever the health effects of diet soft drinks, they aren't particularly pronounced.

>> No. 11968 Anonymous
26th March 2016
Saturday 4:35 pm
11968 Ersatz-pilaf [1]
Or plainly, rice with meat and spices. Yesterday I made something distinctly resembling the subject. But that's not why I'm here.

Tell me something, lads. The meat part tasted awful today after I microwaved what was left from yesterday's portion. I remember at least three similar occasions when meat would taste foul after the microwave. And plenty of occasions when it wouldn't.

Why? I am at a loss here.

[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plov
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>> No. 12081 Anonymous
26th August 2016
Friday 9:14 pm
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splash some water on the leftovers before microwaving.
cover, (with another plate) and reheat slower on a lower setting.
its about all the advice that i can give re this subject. when using a microwave, you must always be prepared for some sacrifice of texture/taste/quality
>> No. 12085 Anonymous
26th August 2016
Friday 9:36 pm
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I've tried to start eating quinoa instead of rice recently. Does anyone have any tips on how to make it taste less disgusting? I like nuts, but quinoa's nuttiness is just not for me. But I tend to just serve it as a side with whatever else I'm eating. Any tips?
>> No. 12086 Anonymous
26th August 2016
Friday 11:37 pm
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It's very good with pesto. Lob in some peas (or prawns) if you're tempted, for a bowl of deeply satisfying glop.
>> No. 12087 Anonymous
27th August 2016
Saturday 12:39 am
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I'll give that a try. I just cooked some using the advice from this page:


1 spoon of Kurkuma
- 1 spoon of Curry
- 1 teaspoon of paprikapowder
- 1 teaspoon of garlic powder
- 1 teaspoon of cinnamon
- 1 teaspoon of garam massala
- 4 shredded limeleaves
- some salt & pepper to taste
- a shot of Kikkoman
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>> No. 12096 Anonymous
4th September 2016
Sunday 7:49 pm
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> splash some water on the leftovers before microwaving.
> cover, (with another plate)
Did that actually. No luck, mate.

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>> No. 12056 Anonymous
3rd August 2016
Wednesday 8:43 pm
12056 Cheap Tasty Eating
Evening cheflads.

I have gone many years without having to live alone, so for the first time I'm having to tighten my belt when it comes to things like food budgeting. Now, I'm a big boy and I have the common sense to do things like save leftovers, cook big portions and freeze them, and base my meals around cheap dried food like pasta and rice.

Trouble is my culinary repertoire is a bit limited in this regard, and I'm getting a bit sick of eating bolognese and carbonara every night. I hear lentils are a great budget staple, but fuck knows how to make nice food out of them. In addition, I've always been a devoted carnivore, and I'm finding it hard to get the amount of meat I crave without overspending or wasting anything.

Do you chaps have any ideas, or recipes that you use yourself, in order to make rich, tasty, tangy food on a limited budget?
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>> No. 12064 Anonymous
3rd August 2016
Wednesday 10:04 pm
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Have you considered providing us with your own culinary excellence, lad? In the sticky?
>> No. 12066 Anonymous
3rd August 2016
Wednesday 10:13 pm
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Soya is pretty much un-noticable in most recipes if you mix it 40/60 with beef mince. Processed food manufacturers do it all the time, partly because it's cheaper but also because it reduces the fat content.

"Nosh for Students" by Joy May is excellent for cheap, easy meals. It contains five meal plans which cost about £20 a week for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Some of the writing is a bit patronising if you're not a wet-behind-the-ears teenager, but it's a solid basis for economical cooking.

>> No. 12067 Anonymous
3rd August 2016
Wednesday 10:22 pm
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I can't see that name without having flashbacks to the 2011 riots.

>> No. 12068 Anonymous
4th August 2016
Thursday 7:45 am
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>"Nosh for Students"

But does it tell you what to do when your dad has died?
>> No. 12069 Anonymous
4th August 2016
Thursday 1:37 pm
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>> No. 12037 Anonymous
28th July 2016
Thursday 7:45 pm
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What're the best cooking shows? I'm looking for one where taste/texture/nutrient combinations are explained and such, something to tickle my aspergers caresses my intellect whilst finding interesting tips for established meals or new meal ideas.

A second thing, there's a clip I saw of a male celebrity chef cooking in Indonesia or somewhere tropical on an outdoor grill thing against a backdrop of the sea/mountains, I can't for the life of me remember what it was or what he was cooking if it rings any bells.
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>> No. 12038 Anonymous
28th July 2016
Thursday 8:09 pm
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Did you not read the weekend thread? At least 1/3 of the posters on .gs haven't had any in months, you can't expect an answer with such a distracting image.

Is the guy you're talking about Rick Stein by any chance?
>> No. 12039 Anonymous
29th July 2016
Friday 12:18 am
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I don't know about cooking shows that go into that kind of detail, but I really enjoyed No Reservations and anything hosted by Keith Floyd.
>> No. 12040 Anonymous
29th July 2016
Friday 1:26 am
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Heston Blumenthal's "In Search of Perfection" is worth a look. He reverse-engineers every aspect of a popular recipe, trying to work out the best possible way of doing everything. The recipes he develops aren't remotely practical for a domestic cook, but the programme gives a tremendous insight into his thinking process.


You might also enjoy this blog:


He cooks relatively simple recipes, but with obsessive attention to detail.
>> No. 12041 Anonymous
29th July 2016
Friday 4:56 pm
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A lot of what he does is accessible to the home cook, but you need to put thought into it yourself to work out where you need to compromise.

For example, the best way you can cook steak at home is with a high heat, and turning it every 30 seconds or so. The traditional way that most chefs is to just turn it once, and the only reason that top chefs do that is because it's what people have always done.
There are a lot of little things like that you can pick up from him which really work.
>> No. 12047 Anonymous
29th July 2016
Friday 7:08 pm
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I'll check out Heston's stuff. I've never really watching cooking shows before except Kitchen Nightmares which is just good fun and not really about cooking.

I do appreciate that blog though, thanks m80.

>> No. 11335 Anonymous
3rd April 2015
Friday 10:28 pm
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have you tried this stuff lads?

the pasta is really tiny and cooks in 3 mins, and the sauce is this bright orange powered american cheese which you mix with butter and milk.

it's the ultimate comfort food

i got a box at poundland
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>> No. 12032 Anonymous
18th July 2016
Monday 10:35 pm
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>Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives

I would never tire of punching this man.
>> No. 12033 Anonymous
19th July 2016
Tuesday 2:57 am
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Who is he and why does he look like an excitable 10 year old from 2003?
>> No. 12034 Anonymous
19th July 2016
Tuesday 3:31 am
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Guy Fieri - restaurateur, TV presenter and human car crash. He is the bleakest thing in all of human existence. If you gaze long into Guy Fieri, Guy Fieri gazes into you.

>> No. 12035 Anonymous
19th July 2016
Tuesday 4:15 am
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>If you gaze long into Guy Fieri, Guy Fieri gazes into you.

That excuses his glasses I suppose.
>> No. 12036 Anonymous
19th July 2016
Tuesday 6:49 am
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I think he wears them that way to ward off tigers.

>> No. 12017 Anonymous
9th June 2016
Thursday 10:24 pm
12017 BBQ
I don't know anything about barbecues. Someone tell me some things about them and recommend one for outdoor use. Ideally I'd like to spend about £200, is this enough for a nice one or should I fork out a bit more?

What are some things I should be aware of when buying a barbecue set?
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>> No. 12020 Anonymous
10th June 2016
Friday 1:52 am
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If it's a nice day just drag cooker out in to yard.
>> No. 12021 Anonymous
10th June 2016
Friday 3:19 am
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They're totally not worth the expense.

Get one on ebay you like the look of. That's all I can say, all they are are things that dispense heat.
>> No. 12022 Anonymous
10th June 2016
Friday 10:46 am
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But I want it to look nice and last for years. I know I could get one off amazon that has good reviews but I was hoping for some insider info.
>> No. 12023 Anonymous
10th June 2016
Friday 11:36 am
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Well, for starters you haven't said if you want a gas bbq or a charcoal one. Gas is a lot less hassle but doesn't give the same smokey bbq flavour imo, it also doesn't feel as satisfying.
>> No. 12024 Anonymous
10th June 2016
Friday 5:17 pm
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You may as well cook on the hob.

When I visited my parents a few weeks ago, they insisted we lay down tin foil on the BBQ and cook on top of that. I did a double take and quickly realised they are being serious.

Why do you do that? I asked. "Because it's healthier and the smoke doesn't get to the meat".
Then save the bother and do it in the oven, because it'll be no different.
After some quarelling and sighs of resignation, I won and we had a normal BBQ as GOD intended. Needless to say, I had the last laugh when they admitted my cooking technique was flawless.

>> No. 11994 Anonymous
3rd May 2016
Tuesday 10:29 pm
11994 Dairy free
Evening, lads.

It looks like a family member is lactose intolerant, so I'll be using a lot more dairy free produce. Are there any dairy substitutes you can recommend? Soya milk and vegan cheese aren't very nice. I used some dairy free cheese sauce in a lasagne and, although it was like cornflour paste with Wotsits before being cooked, it turned out quite decent in the end.
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>> No. 12005 Anonymous
4th May 2016
Wednesday 7:32 am
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>lactose-free milk


(Same principle applies. Actually, I don't mind almond milk but nobody else in the household does. Soya milk is awful.)

Thanks, lad.

>Lactose intolerance is quite rare in otherwise healthy infants. Are you sure it isn't a milk protein allergy?

Not sure, to be honest. The dietician said to avoid dairy for a couple of weeks to see how that goes and she's doing less whiffy farts and her poo is looking better, as far as poo can look better.
>> No. 12006 Anonymous
4th May 2016
Wednesday 1:00 pm
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Does Lactofree really taste that different? >>12003 here, I had an ex in the past who was horrendously allergic to everything including lactose and he could consume Lactofree without turning into Violet Beauregarde so incidentally I've tasted it, and I don't remember it tasting massively dissimilar to normal cow's milk.

Anyway, let me know if you want some recipes. I made a sweet potato puree chilli the other day from Thug Kitchen, it's rather nice - and with a bit of common sense you can put meat in it wherever you like.
>> No. 12007 Anonymous
4th May 2016
Wednesday 1:18 pm
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>just a cheap tablet with each meal

Yeah I guess lactose intolerance is a piece of piss when you live in fantasy land.
>> No. 12008 Anonymous
4th May 2016
Wednesday 1:55 pm
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Lactase tablets cost less than 8p each in bulk. I think that satisfies any reasonable definition of "cheap".

>> No. 12009 Anonymous
4th May 2016
Wednesday 9:24 pm
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> (Same principle applies. Actually, I don't mind almond milk but nobody else in the household does. Soya milk is awful.)

The lactose free milk I linked isn't soy or almond milk, though. It's actual milk milk with lactase (the enzyme that breaks down lactose) added to remove the lactose. It should, in theory, taste just like milk.

>> No. 11979 Anonymous
11th April 2016
Monday 4:24 pm
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Afternoon, lads.

Thanks to raiding the reduced section at Co-op I now have 250g of ricotta and 125g of goats cheese and I'm not really sure what to do with them. I may do the ricotta with leek/spinach, mushrooms and pasta but for the goats cheese I'm stumped as I've never used it before and only ever had it on pizza.
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>> No. 11988 Anonymous
12th April 2016
Tuesday 2:06 pm
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It's from Goat Simulator, basically Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3, but with goats.
>> No. 11989 Anonymous
12th April 2016
Tuesday 2:25 pm
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They must have upgraded the graphics lately. And there was me thinking it was a stock photo of a goat.
>> No. 11990 Anonymous
12th April 2016
Tuesday 2:32 pm
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I thought you were making an irreverent joke, or maybe referencing a line from the I.T. Crowd, but no, it is a real thing.
>> No. 11991 Anonymous
12th April 2016
Tuesday 2:39 pm
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It's actually a pretty fun game for one of those "I am bored and want to play something for 30 minutes to fill the empty void in my life" moments. Sage for /e/ shit on /nom/
>> No. 11992 Anonymous
12th April 2016
Tuesday 3:05 pm
11992 spacer
It is. THPS3/GTA/Shaun the Sheep crossover.

Further sage.

>> No. 11977 Anonymous
31st March 2016
Thursday 9:09 pm
11977 Bake off creme de la creme
Don't know what the cheflads have to say but I really enjoyed the first episode, bit of an eye opener into the standards and expectations in the pastry chef world for a lowly pleb like me.

I particularly savoured the French fellow shitting on everyone and telling them they're shit.

ARE LADS are sending a team in the next episode looking forward to them giving the froggy cunt one in the eye if he gets lippy.

>> No. 10669 Anonymous
26th June 2014
Thursday 12:20 am
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I found the tumblr spiritual equivalent of .gs.
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>> No. 11949 Anonymous
10th March 2016
Thursday 11:59 pm
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That is absolutely tremendous.
>> No. 11950 Anonymous
11th March 2016
Friday 12:13 pm
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I could probably sumit some of my kitchen disasters there.
>> No. 11951 Anonymous
11th March 2016
Friday 2:22 pm
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It's a pretty well-known blog which has been in the press a number of times over the years and has had a compilation book published. I don't think the relatively meagre traffic this site could provide makes it a great marketing opportunity.
>> No. 11952 Anonymous
11th March 2016
Friday 4:51 pm
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Stop talking yourself down purps.
>> No. 11972 Anonymous
26th March 2016
Saturday 7:59 pm
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I am stunned by how close to home some of these posts hit.

>> No. 11921 Anonymous
4th January 2016
Monday 8:47 pm
11921 Eyeties
Right, one of the cheflads here with a bit of homework to do. Though it might be a bit of a scandalous confession here, my roots are deeply in french cooking, that's what I do, and it's what I know.

A friend of mine wants some help with his Italian venture, and I'm suddenly very conscious I just don't know that much about it. Yes, I know a fair few italian styles and techniques, but I don't have a full sense of the culture like I do with traditional french stuff.

So, I'm asking you, dear britfa.gs, to chuck me a list of books, recipe or otherwise, that can help me swot up and get a broad feel for the style, so I'm not completely out of my depth and trying to make spaghetti bourguignon or something.
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>> No. 11922 Anonymous
5th January 2016
Tuesday 7:09 am
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>> No. 11923 Anonymous
5th January 2016
Tuesday 7:57 am
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Good luck but pretty much every restaurant is doomed to fail pretty fast.
>> No. 11924 Anonymous
5th January 2016
Tuesday 2:31 pm
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I like that, though to be honest that's all stuff I knew already, which is sort of reassuring. I've been up all night researching now, and it's pretty clear that italian cooking is a state of mind more than a set of rules. I like it.


Thanks lad. I didn't know restaurants were a volatile business. I'll keep an eye out.
>> No. 11925 Anonymous
5th January 2016
Tuesday 3:51 pm
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There's no need for sarcasm, for individuals it's a huge investment and often a poor one and that should be at the forefront of anyone's mind when undertaking it.
>> No. 11926 Anonymous
6th January 2016
Wednesday 1:30 pm
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Sorry, it's just like telling a rally driver he moght crash, anyone who does it for a living is well aware.

Anyway, I don't have a financial stake in it, I'm just there to guide his team to glory, or shutting in six months, we'll see.

>> No. 11805 Anonymous
20th September 2015
Sunday 9:10 am
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Lads, it's that wonderful time of year again.

Aldi and Lidl are stocking stollen and lebkuchen.

It won't be long until it's time for the annual posting of Gotta Be Andrew on /iq/.
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>> No. 11844 Anonymous
26th October 2015
Monday 12:42 am
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I prefer vodka margarine.

>> No. 11845 Anonymous
26th October 2015
Monday 11:12 am
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Bloody hell, chaps. It's only eight more weeks until Christmas. Better start planning on ram-raiding Iceland for vol au vents before all the other bastards get the chance.
>> No. 11846 Anonymous
26th October 2015
Monday 9:35 pm
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Eight weeks is still 8/52, or around 15.4%, which is not a negligible chunk of year you're dismissing, there.
>> No. 11847 Anonymous
26th October 2015
Monday 9:42 pm
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It is nevertheless a pretty busy time for shopping. In the city where I used to live, pretty much all the way through December the queues to get into the main Tesco backed up onto the main road and tailed back some considerable distance. Where I now live now, the queues near Morrisons at rush hour are pretty nasty, and combined with the Asda across the road causes tailbacks upwards of a mile in early December.
>> No. 11895 Anonymous
12th December 2015
Saturday 3:52 pm
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Aldi's Christmas tree pretzels are lovely. It's just a shame there's little other reason to go there, although they have clementines on special buy so I got a 2kg box for £2.

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