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|>>|| No. 8320
Based on that first half against Nigeria, football's coming home.
|>>|| No. 8322
England are about to make their fifth substitution. How does that work? I thought it was supposed to be three, plus one in extra time.
|>>|| No. 8325
Thanks. Also fair play to UEFA for still having an article from 2004 in their "news" section.
|>>|| No. 8328
That has to be the least convincing 5 - 0 I've ever seen.
Russia were poor but that Saudi side were even worse; it's going to be a massacre when they face Uruguay.
|>>|| No. 8329
They're tiny and lost 2 goals via headers. Hardly surprising really. They defended like primary school children though, unbelievable at the WC, so Russia barely worked up a sweat for there goals. One was an out and out wonder goal. It should have been 3 really, but Saudis collapsed in the final 3 minutes.
They deserved to win, regardless, but they wont beat Uruguay or Egypt unless they vastly improve their passing.
|>>|| No. 8330
So which of Tunisia and Panama is going through as second from England's group?
|>>|| No. 8331
Morocco looking good, could defo upset Portugal if they take their chances.
Watched the BBC UHD stream earlier, it was like looking through a window. Sort of unsettling until you get used to it.
|>>|| No. 8332
I think England will get out of the group this time round, from that point forward I wouldn't bet money on it.
Belgium are, historically speaking, the team which looks most like a world cup winning team according to an analysis of previous winners. They'll for sure beat England, but if team with Sterling, Kane and Alli up front in it can't beat Tunisia and Panama then there is something seriously wrong with the mentality of those players.
|>>|| No. 8333
>Belgium are, historically speaking, the team which looks most like a world cup winning team according to an analysis of previous winners.
Most accounts are saying that Roberto Martínez is doing a fairly poor job of managing them so, even with Courtois at his disposal in goal, Alderweireld, Kompany and Vertonghen in defence, De Bruyne, Dembélé and Hazard in midfield and Batshuayi and Lukaku up front, he could still cock it all up with poor decisions and tactics.
|>>|| No. 8339
>Equaled his previous 3 WC goal tally in one match.
This is lacking a bit of self-awareness, but it was a top match.
48 team World Cup's will make that a thing of the past in the group stages though.
|>>|| No. 8340
I can't even grind Fortnite 14 hours a day without having this shite forced down my throat.
|>>|| No. 8341
I never got the hours and hours of tedious "football analysis" that follows any major football event.
One team kicked the ball into the net more, the same, or fewer times than the other. I don't get this like, shoddy stats - trying to evaluate human error and the like. Does anyone find this stuff vaguely interesting? Poring over every second of the game? Or is it just for those armchair managers you overhear in any pub?
|>>|| No. 8343
Yeah, I can imagine the three-team groups might get a bit predictable. Get seeded in Pot 1 and you're effectively guaranteed a spot in the knockout stages.
|>>|| No. 8344
In what can only be described as a sudden and acute burst of senility, I have entered a sweepstakes at work for the winner and got given Spain at odds of about 15/1. If anyone could tell me if I've just pissed that £1 up the wall entirely that'd be grand, thanks.
|>>|| No. 8346
Barring the first five minutes the French really don't look like they give a shit about trying to win this match. The only way they could appear more nonchalant would be if they occasionally started shrugging and lighting up Gauloises.
|>>|| No. 8347
Spain are one of the favourites, or at least they were until they sacked their manager 2 days before the tournament started.
They have a great chance of winning the whole thing if they can put that behind them as they are more than capable, but no one expects them to win which could take the pressure off them.
Time will tell.
|>>|| No. 8348
>they were until they sacked their manager 2 days before the tournament started.
Fantastic. I'm going to put that down to their fiery and passionate Mediterranean personalities and assume I'm bagging that £25 prize pot. Next round's on me, lads.
|>>|| No. 8349
Pogba's goal might have been the most strangely underwhelming "in off the crossbar" goal I've ever seen. I don't know it was nerves about the VAR or just the general atmosphere of that match, but no one seemed arsed.
|>>|| No. 8351
The 4K stream on iPlayer is a pain in the tits. I know it is still being stress tested, but I was on the second the stream was up so well before the stream would have been full (<100,000 concurrent viewers) and the second half of France vs Australia was still juddery and the audio was out of sync.
They need to sort themselves out. Netflix can stream 4K to a toaster, ffs.
|>>|| No. 8352
It's because it was too soft for a good thwack off the bar.
France were extremely disjointed. If you watched the Spain performance and the France performance and told an unsuspecting person to guess which manager had been there about a week and which one had been there about six years they'd almost certainly guess wrong.
Then again, France are very mercurial when it comes to the Six Nations as well. Must be something in the Frog mentality.
|>>|| No. 8353
Why do they still let Messi take penalties?
|>>|| No. 8355
So ITV commentators can come up with terrible "hand of cod" puns.
|>>|| No. 8356
This Peru side are a lot better than I ever thought. Tiny tricky South Americans
|>>|| No. 8357
I reckon they'll take it if the can beat Kasper, as Denmark don't look like they can break down Peru's defence. Errikson is double marked.
|>>|| No. 8358
Croatia should have won about 5 nil, I think they'll improve as they go on.
|>>|| No. 8359
I think they could beat Argentina, who aren't anything special outside of their attack, so we could see Croatia and Iceland making it out of that group.
|>>|| No. 8361
Argentina, France, Uruguay and Germany have all been underwhelming. Spain will struggle for stability due to changing managers.
It can mean only one thing, lads. Football is actually coming home.
|>>|| No. 8362
I've seen this so much on /sp/ I'm starting to believe it all we need now is for the Swiss to beat Brazil and the prophecy is complete.
|>>|| No. 8363
The way the grouping has turned out this year works a long way in our favour. I think it's still an almost impossibly long shot for us to win, because come on, seriously. But still. It's looking like we'll make it further than we have done in a long while.
|>>|| No. 8364
>The way the grouping has turned out this year works a long way in our favour.
Really? Who's "we" here? Clearly not England, since their third round opponents are almost certainly going to be either Germany or Brazil.
|>>|| No. 8365
Germany looked poor, they've not won in 8 games now. Brazil would be a hard ask, but not an impossible one.
I say this as a Scot with no stake, so I'm not deluding myself. Nothing would chap my arse more than you lot winning another World Cup, but you could. You really could.
|>>|| No. 8366
I watched that Mexico goal on the recap. The final defender fell victim to Lozano's feint, and then he just stood there with his hands in the air while he scored. What the fuck?
|>>|| No. 8367
England won't beat Germany. At best it would be a draw, and we all know how that works out, Southgate more than most.
|>>|| No. 8368
Mate, it's the prophecy. I don't think you understand how prophecies work.
2010 - Pep wins La Liga with Barca. Spain go on to win the World Cup with a squad full of Barca players.
2014 - Pep wins the Bundesliga with Bayern. Germany go on to win the World Cup with a squad full of Bayern players.
2018 - Pep wins the Premier League with Man City. England go on to win the World Cup with a squad full of City players.
It's preordained. You can't argue with it.
|>>|| No. 8370
That was Mesut Ozil, who is decidedly not a defender. I can only assume he thought Lozano was going to hit the ground.
|>>|| No. 8371
>South Korea's coach says he made his players wear different numbered shirts in recent friendlies to confuse opponents who he says cannot tell them apart.
>Only Tottenham forward Son Heung-min and captain Ki Sung-yueng wore their usual shirts against Bolivia and Senegal earlier this month, claimed Shin Tae-yong.
>"We switched them around because we didn't want to show our opponents everything and to try and confuse them," said Tae-yong. "They might know a few of our players but it is very difficult for Westerners to distinguish between Asians and that's why we did that.
I think he realised that he'd missed with his tackle and he was pulling back so he didn't end up fouling him and giving away a penalty. That or it's just Ozil being Ozil.
|>>|| No. 8372
Did you see that ludicrous display last night?
|>>|| No. 8374
Tunisia playing like the dirty swarthy bushy eyebrowed muslemian types they are, more news at ten.
|>>|| No. 8375
It's not great.
Not sure football is coming anywhere near home lads.
|>>|| No. 8378
Well we actually bloody won. I'm not sure what this feeling is, I don't remember the last time I saw England win.
This is a moral victory. England wins world cup in the first round.
|>>|| No. 8382
Homecoming update: Japan beat Colombia. England's path through the knockout rounds slowly being cleared of real threats.
|>>|| No. 8384
Twenty years to the day, I remember being in primary school and our teacher telling us how shameful it was that the previous night English hooligans had smashed up Marseille after winning their match against Tunisia.
|>>|| No. 8385
I thought Poland would be the biggest threat in Group H and they've been dire.
It looks like we're going to actually win a knock out game for the first time since scraping past Ecuador in 2006.
|>>|| No. 8386
I think England could go all they way as long as they can avoid Iceland.
|>>|| No. 8387
The earliest England can face Iceland is the semi-finals.
They'll play either the winner or runner-up from Group H in the last 16 (Poland, Senegal, Colombia or Japan) and in the quarter finals face one of the top two teams from Groups E (Brazil, Switzerland, Costa Rica or Serbia) and F (Germany, Mexico, Sweden or South Korea).
Brazil should top their group and Germany are likely to finish second after losing to Mexico, so these two could meet each other in the last 16. That means it'd be better for England to finish second so they could avoid the victor until the final, although chances are we'd lose to whoever comes out on top between Portugal and Spain in the semis.
|>>|| No. 8389
Do you know what this World Cup is missing? A psychic animal.
|>>|| No. 8391
Croatia and Argentina have enough quality to promise something brilliant, but then a load of shitters who ruin it.
|>>|| No. 8394
Watching Argentina today was like having an out of body experience. Now I understand what it's like to watch England fans suffering.
|>>|| No. 8395
If you look outside their forwards - Messi, Dybala, Aguero, etc. - then they really have a shit squad.
Their first choice keeper, Romero, has spent most of the past five seasons as a bench warmer and Caballero, who was first choice after Romero pulled out, was pretty much in the same position.
Their defenders are players you've largely not heard of or they're shitters like Otamendi. They played a system of three centre backs covered by Mascherano, who is well past his peak and for the third goal he clearly gave up and stood there trying to appeal for offside than actually stop Croatia from scoring.
The rest of their midfield is in a similar position, barring Di María who didn't even get on the pitch yesterday. Players like Lamela didn't even get called up when randomers from the likes of Boca Juniors and River Plate did.
Shit players. Shit manager. Shit system. Messi actually covered less distance in the first round of matches than goalkeepers such as Lloris and Schmeichel.
|>>|| No. 8399
One thing that does concern my about Belgium v England is that Belgium do appear to have players who can pass the ball.
But can they run like a scally wag on a Brit Cops show... we will see.
|>>|| No. 8400
We don't really want to win that game, assuming we beat Panama.
|>>|| No. 8401
This. It's a good job the knockout rounds should be more favourable for us if we finish second.
|>>|| No. 8402
You pair are daft. You can't just throw in the towel for a game like this. If England have to enter the knock outs on the back of a drubbing from Belgium it could be terrible for morale, and what's bad for morale is bad for momentum, and that's hugely important in a WC. What would it say about England if we get smashed by the first big team we encounter? No, no, no, the Belgium game has to be treated like any other.
|>>|| No. 8403
Finishing second normally means a tougher route through the knockout stages, because you end up facing group winners, but right now it's looking like a lot of the big guns are going to miss out on the top spots. That means second place will have us facing the likes of Japan, Mexico and Switzerland instead of Brazil, Germany or Colombia. Playing to a draw will see England through second on goal difference without losing face, so football can come home with dignity.
|>>|| No. 8404
Germany-Sweden has turned into a real nailbiter.
|>>|| No. 8405
I'm really really fucked off they scored that last minute goal.
|>>|| No. 8407
Perchance, did thoust observe that ludicrous expose last night?
|>>|| No. 8410
Even if Belgium utterly embarass England, at least they won't be murderballing and time wasting their way to it.
|>>|| No. 8415
That damned photo doesn't mean a thing. This whole meme has gotten out of hand, he's literally just sitting down and talking with his captain. It's the Miliband eating a bacon sarnie of the WC, with people reading countless things into it without any idea of what they're actually talking about.
|>>|| No. 8417
In that case he's looking a better manager than he is a player right now.
|>>|| No. 8419
Couldn't have happened to a lazier bunch of bottlers.
The Mexican players don't know they're through yet, that will be heart warming.
|>>|| No. 8422
This is the first time since 1966 that England will have progressed further at an international tournament than Germany. Further proof, if it was needed, that football is coming home.
I genuinely can't tell if I'm still taking the piss when I say that or if I'm actually starting to believe it.
|>>|| No. 8423
Every single time Germany were knocked out in the first round they went on to start a World War the year after.
|>>|| No. 8424
>Argentina boss Jorge Sampaoli consulted Lionel Messi about substitutions mid-game as the Albiceleste overcame Nigeria to progress to the last 16 of the World Cup.
>The side were drawing and in need of a goal when an agitated Sampaoli shouted at Messi: ‘Should I bring on Kun?’
>Usually players go out for the second half with their manager’s mid-game team talk still ringing in their ears, but on Tuesday night it was Messi who delivered the speech. Sampaoli was already back in the dugout waiting for the second half to kick off while the rest of the Argentina squad huddled around Messi in the tunnel as he delivered a rousing address.
|>>|| No. 8425
Brazil top their group. England need to find a way to finish second if they want to get past the quarters.
|>>|| No. 8426
I read that Belgium are going to field a largely second-string side to avoid their key players getting injured, so it sounds like they're aiming for the same thing.
I don't think I've ever watched a match where both teams are trying to lose on purpose.
|>>|| No. 8427
Sod off, again.
Getting smash by Martinez's Bilge Pump would damage the hard work the team have done so far. Momentum and morale are more important than 3D chess with the fixtures.
I mean, we got knocked out of the Euros by who again? No one saw that coming and you'd be a mug to think there's an easy game at this stage.
|>>|| No. 8430
If you could choose between facing the winner of Mexico vs. Brazil or Sweden vs. Switzerland in the quarter finals then it's a no-brainer.
|>>|| No. 8433
Do you want to win the World Cup or do you want your arse pounded by Brazilians?
This is no different to Switzerland playing the numbers to get into Pot 1 in 2014 to avoid the big guns.
|>>|| No. 8434
WE CAN ARSE POUND THEM, right in their bumholes. Stop thinking like a loser.
No, but the Allies didn't have our set pieces. Brazil don't even have a proper captain for goodness sake.
|>>|| No. 8435
I seem to recall that after that fixture it was the USSR that went on to win the tournament, beating Germany in the final.
|>>|| No. 8436
>WE CAN ARSE POUND THEM, right in their bumholes.
|>>|| No. 8438
>Stop thinking like a loser.
Because thinking like a winner worked so well in the Euros and in Brazil.
|>>|| No. 8439
I think you've taken my WW2 analogy too far, but given the USSR no long exists that really opens the door the England, what with the USA not qualifying... or Japan.
Those teams were paralysed by fear, they couldn't have had less confidence if you told them the pitches had been freshly cursed by a Franco-Argentine wizard.
|>>|| No. 8440
Reports are that Vardy, Cahill, Jones, Alexander-Arnold, Dier and Delph are all starting.
We're playing for 0 - 0 and to get more bookings than them in order to finish second.
|>>|| No. 8441
All they need to do is get someone sent off in injury time and job's a good'un. Just need to do it in a way that's not so obvious that FIFA would turf them both out.
|>>|| No. 8442
Japan finished their match by just playing triangles, trying not to concede or get anyone booked, though why the ref didn't book anyone for timewasting I've no idea.
First place gets Colombia and Brazil before going home, second place gets Japan and either Switzerland or Sweden, before playing a semi in the same stadium as the final, likely against Spain.
So what's it to be, lads? Win the tournament or lose to a team in yellow?
|>>|| No. 8443
>First place gets Colombia and Brazil before going home, second place gets Japan and either Switzerland or Sweden
Colombia topped their group. It's either face Colombia for a relatively easy quarter final or face Japan and most likely Brazil afterwards.
|>>|| No. 8449
Now it's 1-0. Hold on there and IT'S COMING HOME.
|>>|| No. 8451
No real shots on target and repeated aimless balls into the box that the Belgians were mopping up easily. No way that match wasn't thrown.
|>>|| No. 8452
>No real shots on target and repeated aimless balls into the box
That's what she said.
|>>|| No. 8453
>check news to see if British fans have caused any mayhem yet
>only Serbs gathered in a large group chanting "fuck USA"
So much for your over-glorified "hardcore" football fans, Anglos. Pretty disappointing. One must wonder if mayhaps all western men have been on a strict regimen of soy these past two-three decades.
|>>|| No. 8454
And there was me looking forward to a discussion about English football hooliganism, but then you had to spoil it all by spamming some shitty 4chan meme.
|>>|| No. 8455
And then I go and spoil it all by saying somethin' stupid like "soya boy".
|>>|| No. 8456
I thought about going there myself but it felt a bit passé, no offense, like.
|>>|| No. 8457
Spamming is when you post a million copies of a single message. This is not it.
Here's something I don't get, perhaps you'll indulge me: why are you Englishmen so easily irritated by and uppity about every minuscule thing? I haven't met a single Anglo in my life who wasn't like that, like a goddarn peacock with its feathers in all directions. You don't do banter. This entire site is a testament to that, you people can't go a second without some arses going off or throwing vitriol in each other's direction. Why is that? I don't mean to categorize, but that has been my experience with all Anglos so far.
Take me, for example, I rarely ever get annoyed, but even when I do more often than not I simply choose to ignore whatever irritated me and try to forget about it and continue about my day, instead of dwelling on it or giving it any thought, because giving every single negative thing, no matter how minor, the time of day just doesn't make sense, unless the point of your entire life is to get pissed at as many things in a day as possible.
|>>|| No. 8458
Our entire site is banter, it's not our fault that foreigners are incapable of it. Also fuck off.
|>>|| No. 8462
>if u dont like it
As a matter of fact I do like it here. 99% I just lurk because I know that you people don't like foreigners stinking up your board and I totally understand wanting to preserve your unique imageboard culture. I immensely enjoy reading posts on here. Not to sound like an arselicker, but your English is objectively vastly superior to what passes as "English" on most American sites. It's like mind candy.
|>>|| No. 8466
Can we just drop the whole thing? You chose a spectacularly bad time to start riling us up what with the weather and all.
Predictions everyone? I think we'll edge past Columbia, comfortably beat Sweden then get knocked out by Spain in the semis. They'll perform a perfectly choreagraphed display of synchronised diving and beat us with a penalty or two.
|>>|| No. 8467
Sure thing. It's just my autism is acting up again.
Alright, alright, I'm gone.
|>>|| No. 8470
Why are Argentina so shit? They are getting outran to every. Single. Ball.
|>>|| No. 8473
Messi and Ronaldo out on the same day.
That Uruguayan defence looks quite formidable.
|>>|| No. 8474
They parked the bus quite well for the entire second half. Portugal wasted so much possession though. Could have been 4 or 5, whereas Uruguay score was pretty representative of how they played on the counter.
Great match though.
|>>|| No. 8475
I was angry as hell after the Champions League final. Ramos is an out and out thug. The eskimo world was pretty steamed broccoli too, if Twatter is anything to go by.
|>>|| No. 8476
Godin is probably the best centre back in the world and his partner in defence, Giménez, plays with him at Atlético so that's a considerable advantage over other teams.
Everyone on Twitter is a raving lunatic. It shouldn't be used as a barometer for anything.
|>>|| No. 8477
Spain have been pretty dire since their match against Portugal. Realistically, Croatia are the only obstacle between us and a World Cup final if James Rodriguez is crocked.
|>>|| No. 8479
I don't understand why so many teams stick their #1 player in goal. Seems like a negative use of their best resource.
|>>|| No. 8480
Mum, get off .gs before someone bumps an unsavoury thread.
|>>|| No. 8482
I don't normally watch football so I think there's something I've missed, but is that meant to be a joke?
|>>|| No. 8483
Spain out on penalties.
IT'S FUCKING WELL COMING HOME LADS
|>>|| No. 8485
The type of stats that make you want to throw your computer out of the window when playing Football Manager.
Little point having all that possession if you can't finish.
|>>|| No. 8486
Ask Man City. What an absolute shocker, I can't believe RASSIYA have actully gone and done it. Their goalie was really good to be fair while de Gea was suprisingly underwhelming. I think panic got to the Spaniards, they'd never expected this. They were probably planning far ahead while assuming this match would be a formality. Lesson learned: never take victory in Russia for granted.
|>>|| No. 8487
Croatia are doing their usual choke in the knockout rounds. The World Cup final is as good as ours.
|>>|| No. 8489
They're both playing really well, Croatia less so, but even so it's far better than Spain v Russia.
|>>|| No. 8490
They're choking alright. You could see it in Modric's face before that penalty he was going to bottle it.
|>>|| No. 8491
Nobody actually wants to win this game.
|>>|| No. 8493
Predict today's cupset.
Mexico or Nippon?
|>>|| No. 8494
Well if Jesus is as pants as he has been, and the defense is as shaky as it is currently for the whole ninety minutes, I'm saying Mexico. Nippon a shit, to be frank.
|>>|| No. 8495
If Mexico win, Jesus will get crucified.
What is this "coat" of which you speak?
|>>|| No. 8496
Most predictable result of the cup so far. Brazil 2-0 up in extra time, straight to the quarterfinals. Bring on the Greater East Asia Co-Prosperity Sphere v Nigel's Bane.
|>>|| No. 8500
Japan leading 2-0. Brazil in final pretty much confirmed.
|>>|| No. 8501
The problem with the Nips is that they're too short. If their average height was a little bit taller they'd have won that.
|>>|| No. 8502
I don't get it, the gasman talked to me about football, so I talked football back and he still looked at me like I told him I like to have fat birds piss on my face. I'm not cut out to be working class, I'm a complete and utter freak and not a thing I do will ever, ever change that.
Come on England.
|>>|| No. 8504
My experience with gasmen has been that they have that expression on their face 24/7.
|>>|| No. 8506
I'm so tense I almost don't want to watch. If we actually made it to the final I might bloody die.
|>>|| No. 8507
Part of me wants England to win just so the English will finally shut up about fucking 1966.
|>>|| No. 8508
I've noticed that things are really physical this year. Players are dishing out full-on rugby tackles and the referees are seemingly doing nothing. When did football become a full-contact sport?
|>>|| No. 8509
Case-in-point, Barrios has just blatantly gone for a deliberate headbutt on Henderson and somehow only gets a yellow card. Nigel Owens has ejected players from the rugby field for less than that.
|>>|| No. 8510
It's the foreigners. They're dirty players, especially the South Americans and the Arabs.
|>>|| No. 8513
If only dissent and timewasting were bookable offences, then maybe Colombia would be down to eight men by now.
|>>|| No. 8515
Lads I bet my entire rent money on England to win. You said they'd win the whole tournament so obviously this game was not in question. I'm so fucked if they lose. So fucked. Please I trusted you.
|>>|| No. 8516
God why did I bother watching. I'd given up watching England after the dire 2014 WC, but I'd got lured back in after a reasonable group stage.
|>>|| No. 8518
I can't believe all I have is contingent on a penalty shoot out. At this point it feels like a coin flip. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
|>>|| No. 8519
This is the stuff that legends are made of. I just hope they don't do any heroics.
|>>|| No. 8520
I wouldn't normally complain about England going out on penalties, but even as a (sort of) neutral, Colombia have fucking stolen this match. They've been utterly fucking disgusting, and it beggars belief that they can finish this game with all 11 still on the field.
|>>|| No. 8525
I would agree with you but they played a lot better in the last 20 minutes.
|>>|| No. 8526
I'll stop. Sorry chaps, I'm nervous as fuck.
|>>|| No. 8527
>they played a lot better in the last 20 minutes
... with a full complement of players.
|>>|| No. 8529
IT'S COMING HOME LADS
IT'S REALLY FUCKING COMING HOME
|>>|| No. 8531
WE LITERALLY CAN'T LOSE THE ENTIRE THING LADS
GET YOUR WC18 TATTOOS NOW
|>>|| No. 8535
Fuck me that was tense.
Ian Wright nearly in tears, the LAD
|>>|| No. 8537
Fuck me I wouldn't want to watch one of those when I'm pushing 80, men in family have a history of weak hearts as it is.
Still, COMING HOME STATUS: ITZ
|>>|| No. 8538
Is it normal to not stop thinking about your own mortality after England win a knock-out match or am I just mentally ill?
|>>|| No. 8541
DO YOU KNOW WHAT EVERYONE WILL LIKE? IF WE PLAY THE FIRST THREE NOTES OF SEPTEMBER BY EARTH, WIND & FIRE REPEATEDLY.
|>>|| No. 8542
That cunt's got a fucking trumpet. WE PLAY CORNETS IN THIS COUNTRY, TRAITOR.
|>>|| No. 8543
One musical instrument of any kind in a sports stadium is one too many.
|>>|| No. 8545
*BANG* *BANG* *BANG*
I actually bumped into this glorious fat bastard while out shopping once, it was during our magical season when he started appearing in a few papers. He was very nice and somewhat quiet in the way that huge guys often are. It occured to me afterwards that he was probably quite sick of randoms coming up to him like I did, but he was perfectly polite. Bless him.
|>>|| No. 8546
How do they decide which set of cunts get to be the England band? What happens if two lots of guys with drums and brass instruments show up, do they fight each other to be The Band?
Do they have a band battle to see who can go DUUHHH DUUHHH DUH-DUH-DUH DUH-DUH-DUUUHHH DUHH DUHH the loudest?
|>>|| No. 8549
Fifteen thousand musical instruments of that specific kind in a sports stadium is fifteen thousand too many.
|>>|| No. 8550
...So it is literally one specific set of dudes? Fuck me, that's actually blagged my head a bit.
I always just assumed it was random overly enthusiastic pissed blokes who half remember their primary school trumpet lessons.
|>>|| No. 8551
Yep. Millions of England fans but only three people in the entire country have decided to go to Russia so they can play Rule Britannia on a loop.
|>>|| No. 8554
HE'S GOING HOME
HE'S GOING HOME
NEYMAR'S GOING HOME
|>>|| No. 8556
I think he's had a good competition, but he was a clear second to Tom Daley.
|>>|| No. 8558
Might as well bet the rent money on Sweden, then. 7/2 isn't bad odds for them to snooker us in under 90 minutes.
|>>|| No. 8559
All we have to do is win three football matches and we've won the World Cup.
Sweden won't be as easy as people make out. They bested the Netherlands and Italy just to reach the tournament and they're solid enough defensively to nullify most of our set pieces. I doubt I'm going to enjoy the game tomorrow.
|>>|| No. 8560
As much as I desperately want England to win the WC, I do not under any circumstances want Roberto Martinez to win it. That would really, really do my head in.
|>>|| No. 8561
The Neverlands are having a crisis with their national team, beating them isn't very impressive at the moment.
I still think we're going to lose tomorrow though. Prove me wrong, Kane!
|>>|| No. 8562
No offence lads, but I dread the idea of England winning the world cup. We'll never hear the end of it. Patriotic shite on an endless loop, for months.
|>>|| No. 8563
England is perhaps the only great country whose intellectuals are ashamed of their own nationality. In left-wing circles it is always felt that there is something slightly disgraceful in being an Englishman and that it is a duty to snigger at every English institution, from horse racing to suet puddings. It is a strange fact, but it is unquestionably true that almost any English intellectual would feel more ashamed of standing to attention during “God Save the King” than of stealing from a poor box.
|>>|| No. 8566
Now that we've won as many World Cups as Argentina and Uruguay, how long do you lads think it'll be before we match Italy and Germany?
|>>|| No. 8567
Is Freeview on a delay? My neighbour was cheering Maguire's goal before the corner had even been kicked on my TV. Can't watch a match like this.
|>>|| No. 8568
My thoughts exactly. It'll be spitfires, bulldogs and fat middle aged men screaming for weeks on end.
I don't want to sound like an edgy teenlad but I cannot fathom patriotism. It makes as much sense to be of being proud of your eye colour.
|>>|| No. 8572
[ ] NOT COMING HOME
[X] COMING HOME
|>>|| No. 8573
How shit was Sterling?? He played like he couldn’t be fucking arsed.
|>>|| No. 8574
The rest of his game has been fine, he just can't seem to finish for shit. I'd have Loftus-Cheek starting over him.
|>>|| No. 8577
I hope Croatia win, just because I think England v Russia would not go down well due to the current geopolitical climate.
|>>|| No. 8579
I wanted Russia to win that purely because it would be more interesting.
I rate our chances a lot better against Croatia now, their squad will have been really drained from that while ours was a leisurely game. And the fact they had to struggle so hard against a Russian side not exactly dripping in quality bodes well.
|>>|| No. 8580
Remember lads, for dinner Sunday week, set a place for football.
|>>|| No. 8582
Your mum's a madlib.
Anyway, the lad saying we shouldn't have rested players against Belgium was clearly talking shite. All four semi-finalists rested players during their final group match and having fresher legs has paid off.
|>>|| No. 8587
They were smoking behind the bike sheds instead of attending Camera Class.
|>>|| No. 8590
BRB, rice packing in progress. This level of mania cannot possibly end well.
|>>|| No. 8591
I quite like the salty responses, but that's about it. We are truly fucked if it actually comes home. Billions in
improvements damage on the horizon.
Still, it's not as bad as this, which I'm not going to embed: 1NID2BQhMss
|>>|| No. 8593
This is a very self-centred post, but all these celebrations are bumming me out because I'm too much of a sperg to be a part of them. Not that I want to smash up an Ikea or anything, but, you get me.
|>>|| No. 8597
I don't think I'd like to face France or Belgium in the final.
|>>|| No. 8598
Either would stomp us. I'm almost hoping Croatia would go on and win it. Not really, but still.
|>>|| No. 8600
Disagree, I think France will win the whole thing but we'd take Belgium if they go through and we magically manage not to choke and lose to Croatia.
|>>|| No. 8602
France were immense defensively. Nothing for Harry Kane to worry about, mind.
|>>|| No. 8603
France in the final. Getting scared now lads, I don't think I could cope with losing the World Cup to France.
|>>|| No. 8604
I'd rather France win than see Bobby Martinez lifting the World Cup.
|>>|| No. 8606
Poor Thierry Henry. I imagine he will be gutted.
(Think it might be coming home lads)
|>>|| No. 8607
Courtois has had a full blown teary in his post-match interview. He's criticised France for playing anti-football and would rather have lost to Brazil because they dare to play football and might actually be better than them. He's criticised the referee, saying he doesn't know where they found him and he favoured the French. He's also doubted whether it was wise to finish top of their group as he'd have preferred to have been in the half of the bracket England ended up in with weaker opposition.
|>>|| No. 8608
KFC advert from South Africa, inspired by Neymar.
|>>|| No. 8609
Are you lads excited for the England match on Sunday?
|>>|| No. 8613
There's a women in the flat opposite me watching the football, and it sounds like she's on the verge of an orgasm.
|>>|| No. 8617
The status of football, vis a vis England and home:
[ ] COMING
|>>|| No. 8623
IT'S BUGGERED OFF
IT'S BUGGERED OFF
FOOTBALL'S BUGGERED OFF
|>>|| No. 8624
Viz Top Tip: Always bet against your team when they're 1-0 up, so if the other team turn things around and bum rape you at least you have some money to go out on the lash and have a curry and glass anyone in a red shirt and that.
|>>|| No. 8625
It's a crying shame.
I was really looking forward to see England get beaten by France.
Still, good luck to Croatia. They're probably the least evil of the Former Yugoslav Republics.
|>>|| No. 8626
There's the women's World Cup next year. That'll be worth a chuckle or two.
|>>|| No. 8627
Well lads, we beat Brazil, Germany, Argentina etc. And we can be proud. We didn't embarrass ourselves, we just lost a game of football.
|>>|| No. 8628
Does this make every major metropolitan centre in the UK more or less likely to get smashed to pieces? Looking forward to seeing Belgium again, honestly, great bunch of lads. Southgate's hopefully in this for the long haul and a lot of these faces will be in the squad for a while yet, Vardy not being a World Cup winner is a travesty, mind you.
Please don't make me go on my rant about why people who don't like women's footie are plebs who don't like football at all, I'm just not in the mood.
|>>|| No. 8629
I really didn't think I'd actually be this sad.
My entire life fell apart over the last few years and I truly hit rock bottom. I wasn't suicidal exactly but definitely woke up every day in 2017 wishing I hadn't. I've done everything I could to turn things around this year and was starting to feel like the stars were aligning or something.
Oh well. Serves me right for having a glimmer of hope. At least I have my personal progress. Whinge for whingy blogposting.
|>>|| No. 8630
Let's be honest, lads. Being English, we crave disappointment. Just imagine if we'd have won, and the dent it would have made on our national psyche.
We've had a spell of heat and it's turned all our heads funny, but at least normal service will be resuming shortly. There's a big fuckoff storm on its way and England have been knocked out of the world cup.
It's the dependable, reliable normality we need in a topsy turvy year.
|>>|| No. 8631
Come on, mate, chin up. England spent many of the previous tournaments high off their own farts got absolutely nowhere, but this time they worked hard, had a good time and gave the whole country a hell of a ride. Obviously it would have been nice to win the whole thing apropo of nothing, but we've gotten far closer than anyone thought.
Basically, winning is very gauche and Saturday's kick about with those big, lanky, Belgian lads will be a lovely time for all.
|>>|| No. 8632
I love these mental gymnastics to try and retain some dignity. We didn't play Brazil, Germany, or Argentina. So we didn't actually beat any of them, and then we lost to Croatia, a country of 4 million people that is barely older than its players.
|>>|| No. 8633
>retain some dignity
Clear off, mate. Go whinge in the comments section of your newspaper of choice, they're usually bizarrely hysterical when it comes to footie. England played well for the majority of their minutes, the overwhelming majority. Basically every group had two shitter teams no one had any hopes for, the difference this time is England wasn't one of them. Player for player we aren't really much better Croatia, arguably their midfield puts them beyond us in fact, so while this wasn't some Escape to Victory-esque feelgood story, painting this as a embarrassing national pantsing is silly. If you want to see that go watch Brazil 2014 and France 2016.
|>>|| No. 8634
IT'S COMING HOME
IT'S COMING HOME
THIRD IS COMING HOME
Let's get our own back against what is pretty much a non-country.
|>>|| No. 8635
>pretty much a non-country
Please don't say this, even as a joke, it makes me grind my teeth involuntarily.
|>>|| No. 8636
To be fair it really is just half France and half Netherlands, but more racist and full of boring paedofiles.
|>>|| No. 8638
Did you see that ludicrous display last night?
Anyway, it just goes to show really, we've gone for years putting all our hopes on big-knob mangers like Eriksson, and teams full of twats like Beckham and Rooney. Now we're back to a squad full of "inexperienced" players who actually understand what teamwork means and we have our best performance in decades.
|>>|| No. 8639
It's a shame they ran out of ideas. It worked in the first half because they couldn't cope with the pace but in the second half they began to tire, Croatia started pressing forward and bossing the midfield and Lovren actually remembered he was a defender.
If Kane had squared that ball to Sterling it could have been an entirely different story.
|>>|| No. 8640
I assume you're taking the piss. I don't think the Kingdom of Croatia had a national football team.
|>>|| No. 8642
That has nothing to do with what you posted in >>8632 and you know it. Croatia is a fine old real country - unlike, say, Belgium. No one had a national football team in the fifteen hundreds. You fucking mong.
|>>|| No. 8643
It has everything to do with it and you're just slow. The Croats and the region have a long-standing ethnic and geographical identity, yes - like most places in the world - but the nation-state is very young, and a country which experiences a lot of political and social upheaval, such as those in 20th Century Eastern Europe, aren't able to devote as much time or resources to the development of sports or the necessary infrastructure thereof as more stable countries. England on the other hand has been the same nation in every competition for the last hundred years. I suggest you think about the impact of 1966 on the English national psyche and how Croatians at the time had to instead be satisfied with their Olympic gold under the flag of Yugoslavia.
|>>|| No. 8645
England out, irrelevant cunt-off and its started raining, complete normalcy has been restored. Oh well, we’ll always the Spartak shoutout...
|>>|| No. 8646
Come on now lad, people play football all over the world. Even if you want to go all 20th century "bla bla Yugoslavia", the same people have been playing the same game for as long as we have. The fact that they do it under a different flag now means SFA. We might as well be discussing how Russia have done so well to build a team out of the ruins of the USSR you utter fucking ponce.
|>>|| No. 8651
Too right, load of old bollocks.
How are we doing in the tennis?
|>>|| No. 8652
Jamie Murray is in the mixed doubles final and Jack Draper is in the junior singles final.
|>>|| No. 8656
This is some serious bullshit refereeing.
|>>|| No. 8657
Refball has begun, France are being France and the ref is Argentinian. Croatia are fucked unless they pull something magical out of the half-time team talk.
I fucking hate the way France play so much, it's so shit to watch as a neutral. No one likes cheats except the Chinese.
|>>|| No. 8658
Lloris is far too slow for shenanigans like that.
I didn't bring a coat, but I'm taking this one.
|>>|| No. 8659
Really not arsed who won, but France are pretty drab to watch,, weirdly.
|>>|| No. 8660
Croatia were robbed in the first half, but France were determined to silence the critics who would have called them cheaters.
I mean, they are, but they also have Mbappe and he opened up the Croatian defence quite well.
|>>|| No. 8661
Does a losing finalist always get the Golden Ball? It's some kind of poison chalice.
|>>|| No. 8662
France have been drab all tournament. They stifle the opposition and rely on the likes of Pogba, Griezmann and Mbappe for a moment of quality.
Griezmann's celebration gets on my tits.
|>>|| No. 8664
At least England don't leave empty-handed. Kane bagged the Golden Boot.
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