>>23246
Instead, why don't we just delete every single board and have a few huge threads instead. Weekend, anger, work, Left politics, nonce politics, race hate politics and international politics.

>>23247
Because huge threads break the site.

I was really craving some sweets earlier but as I walked to my local cornershop I realised the schools are still not out for the summer. My local shop is opposite a primary school you see so come 1530 its packed with children and mothers.

Fuck sake I just want to buy many times my recommended allowance of sugar in peace without being judged. When do the schools break-up lads?

I AM FUCKING DYING, MAKE IT STOP.

I've downloaded Spore for my kids, although I've decided to have a crack at it myself, but fucked if I can understand the paint system on the character creator.

I'm not sure if I hate my job or I just hate working.

>>23254
Why not both?

>>23254


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TjPhzgxe3L0

>>23251

Yesterday my mum roped me into weeding her fucking horses fields; plural. I dressed for how the weather's been for the last 4 months so predictably ended up hobbled with heatstroke.

Also I keep eating crap food and I can't stop.

>>23254
I had a massive realisation the other day. I found out what my dream is. I want to wake up everyday with absolutely nothing to do. No responsibilities what so ever. Absolutely nothing to do.

>>23258
Did you happen to see your couple's counsellor die of a heart attack during a session?

>>23258

Is it bad that sometimes I think about quitting my job and just doing hobbies I enjoy at home?

A computer,a watch, some pens and a notepad are all I need. I like learning languages, learning skills (it's great to code) and read.

My parents have practically paid off the mortgage and my baby boomer dad has tens of thousands tucked away somewhere.

I sometimes wonder what the worst that could happen is. I live at home? Enjoy my time on earth? They'd never kicked me out.

My only fear is that one day they'll die and the house will be split between me and two other siblings and I want to have enough money to buy it outright.

If I owned a house outright, how much income would I need anyway? Surely within the next 20 yrs we'll see some form of UBI and I'll literally be freed.

>>23258

Don't worry lad. When the robots take our jobs, we can finally abandon the shackles of capitalism and live in a post-scarcity socialist utopia. The only remaining fields of human endeavour will be increasingly pretentious art; and porn of the most utterly depraved, hedonistic kind.

Until then, you can always go on the dole.

>>23261

How fucked would I be as a single male in regards to accommodation if I was theoretically dole scum? Would I eventually get some sort of roof over my head and a door I could lock?

Bertrand Russell's essay on this subject is a long read, but it's well worth it:

http://harpers.org/archive/1932/10/in-praise-of-idleness/

>>23261
>>23262
Being dolescum in itself is a full time job. I have been on it, and for the amount of stress I was put through for that shitty pay, it is ridiculous.

>>23261
People have been saying that for ages now. There will always be work for the workers. The queen bee won't be a queen if the worker bees aren't workers any more.

>>23260
I think about it a lot, but my situation is a bit worse than yours, so I don't know what to do.

>>23259
I don't understand.

I want to enjoy this evening outside but some cunt's house alarm in the next street has been going off for fucking hours now.

>>23265
>People have been saying that for ages now. There will always be work for the workers. The queen bee won't be a queen if the worker bees aren't workers any more.
Who do you think the robots will be working for?

The working classes being liberated from the drudgery of work to live in a post-scarcity leisure society is an optimistic scenario, though. They could just be left to rot and die in exurban slums.

Give it to me straight lads. I'm early 20s. Am I gonna get to nob around with free money whilst robots do the shit in a world where only the hardest jobs require people who will earn lots, or am I gonna be dealing with Janet from HR telling me my email footer doesn't comply with the business accepted standard because I refuse to put a number on it.

You'd be amazed how much more work I get done now by simply removing my number off the footer. If people want to speak to me about something important, they'll email and ask for my number. The amount of cunts ringing for the sake of wasting time has drastically cut down. It's amazing.

>>23269
You and Janet will be fighting over a tin of beans in the ruins of an ASDA once are Theresa uses the bombs.

>>23265
I'd be the first to demand that the only condition for claiming unemployment benefit should be that you are unemployed, but the basics really aren't that difficult. You apply for jobs, you record that you applied for jobs, and then you show that record to your advisor when you sign on. Given the amount of free time we have as dolescum it's a piece of piss to satisfy those requirements. I know I found it difficult but then I am a fuckup in general and Tory Britain makes no concessions for people like me, but the average person shouldn't be struggling.

Unless of course you're referring to all that extra bullshit they have nowadays under the Work Programme, because that's just a whole other kettle of fuckery.

>>23271
>the basics really aren't that difficult
>I know I found it difficult
Hmm...

>>23268

Yeah, it's basically a coin toss as to which way it will go. As the working classes are made obsolete by robots, the rich will no doubt try and protect their position and the current Order Of Things.

The problem is they'll soon realise that robots don't buy very many flat screens, or Will Smith DVDs, or novelty cat mugs, or generally make a good foundation for an economy based on vapid consumerism. Then it'll all start to fall apart and they will wonder what the fuck went wrong.

That's when the forgotten, hungry masses of the sub-proletariat will strike, sensing the weakness at the heart of an establishment that by then, can no longer be sold in propaganda as "on their side" like it is in today's era. Hopefully they will have the sheer strength of numbers to achieve a revolution, and restore humanity to a path of egalitarianism and progress.

It's more likely to be a hybrid of the two. They'll let the proletariat masses starve and reduce the population of the earth to about a hundredth of what it is at present. Then it'll just as inevitably all fall apart and there will be a revolution amongst the elites themselves, humanity will achieve its goal of utopian space-faring egalitarianism, but the downside is that every human alive to see this golden age is the descendant of 21st century bourgeoisie scum.

>>23272
Boy it sure is easy to take things out of context eh.

>>23273
Oh Seamus.

>>23275
Is this a reference to something?

Speaking of queen bees, there's been a spider building wispy fucking cobwebs in the corner of my living room for months and I can only assume it's a she because she moves so fucking fast and I haven't seen any other spiders around in the house since she moved in. She's clearly established a pecking order and she's not letting go for love nor money. For the past 3 hours since I got home from work she's been hanging out in the corner between her skirting board when her lair is and the entrance to the kitchen, just far enough out that I feel worried she'll scuttle over my feet whenever I want to make a cuppa. She's gone back a few times when I've moved the door or stamped on the ground but she kept coming back out so now I'm not messing. I've already evicted her a few months ago out the back door but somehow she's come back in and now she's just there, not fucking moving, on my carpet. Taunting me with the fact she doesn't pay rent and my arachnophobia makes me unwilling to go near the hole in the skirting board that's her digs.

I've named her Felicia. Fuck you, Felicia.

>>23258
>>23260
Well what would you do if you had a million pounds?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4lmW2tZP2kU

Figure out what gives your life meaning and do that. You can just about support yourself by working part-time so maybe you could do some OU courses, write Haikus or just read and read.

I turned down a lucrative career a few years back and stayed in academia to do research. While I worry about money and things I can honestly say that I'm happy which is allot better than when I was 20 considering suicide because it all seemed so pointless to go on.

>>23265
>The queen bee won't be a queen if the worker bees aren't workers any more.

This analogy always upsets me. Bees do not work that way.

I get that this is beside the point and largely I agree with your post but this is /101/. Humans are not eusocial insects and ultimately our understanding of bee society tells us more about ourselves than it does explain them.

>>23278

>You can just about support yourself by working part-time

I'm sorry lad, but although you think you are writing a helpful and upbeat post, you are sadly working almost entirely within the realms of fantasy.

Not even 50 posts and we have a cunt off.

>>23273
What if instead things largely just follow the pattern set by the industrial revolution and every other technological revolution before.

We'll retrain the hunters to farm crops and make primitive pornography. Redundant farmers and sabot makers will be retrained to forge steel and make pornographic photographs etc. etc.

>>23279
I manage it. Its a bit shit not being able to go down the pub but plenty of jobs use the label 'part-time' if you find you need to work 30-35 hour weeks.

Your mileage may vary I guess.

>>23282
Then they're labelling them wrong. Anything over 30 hours is classified as full-time.

>>23281

But it can't be turtles all the way down. Problem is there are really a shockingly small amount of actual jobs out there, and once a big one gets taken out, you are dealing with an influx of people who used to work in one industry flooding every other.

When I say there's a shockingly small amount of jobs, that's the crux of the matter. Of course there's millions of people employed in a myriad of roles, but huge numbers of them basically do the same thing. Imagine how many truck drivers there are in the world, taxi drivers, pilots, etc- As soon as we have workable self-driving vehicles, those vast swathes of people are permanently out of work, and the job of "move stuff/people from point A to point B", no matter what fancy flavour of that job, is made obsolete. Those people have to retrain, but the pool of available things that need to be done just gets smaller and smaller as more of those things get automated.

We're already well on the way there. Look what has happened to the economy thanks to China, India etc replacing all our previous low-skill jobs. Just imagine how fucked we are when they figure out how to automate "sit at a desk and look busy".

>>23278
"I dunno, I'll probably just invest it."
"Ooh, calm down."
"Oh I'm sorry, did I say invest it? I meant 'be cool and piss it all away'."

>>23281

If we continue to find new jobs, no problem. If the jobs start drying up, then we need to completely reinvent the economy or risk a collapse of society. We can't just assume that the status quo will continue and hope for the best, we need to start planning now.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Technological_unemployment#21st_century

>>23281
>What if instead things largely just follow the pattern set by the industrial revolution and every other technological revolution before.

Martin Ford's Rise of The Robots has a good section on this. To summarise, there are in fact very solid indications that "the pattern" has broken down. Technological revolutions have ceased to bring the benefits that they used to: the link between productivity and median wages has collapsed, long term economic inactivity is on the rise, after every recession it is taking longer and longer for the jobs wiped out to return (and when they do they're worse jobs, and we see an increase in the share of part time workers, contributing to the polarisation of incomes).

Education and training was the answer to "where do the displaced workers go?" in the past. But recent innovations in technology, however, have brought machine intelligence on in leaps and bounds, meaning that that's an approach that's running out of usefulness. There is no special rule that means that computers made of flesh will always have a privileged place in the economy over those made of silicon.

>>23287

Unless the computers made of silicon develop AI complex enough to develop consumerism, the ones made of flesh will always be necessary. There is no economy if nobody's there (or more to the point, nobody can afford) to exchange money for goods and services. That's where the turning point will happen.

The "economy" itself is just a rational system of self organisation, it's a haphazard way for us humans, crippled by ideas like free will and lacking the ability to communicate as a telepathic hivemind, to roughly co-ordinate our actions. This wouldn't be a problem if the robots replaced us entirely, robots have wi-fi and cold logic.

Anyway I'm rambling. The economy can keep on spiralling upwards for a while, with an ever shrinking pool of rich people using their ever more advanced technology to make, buy and sell each other ever fancier holographic speedboats and diamond-encrusted cybernetic limbs or whatever it is; but capitalism is nonetheless destined to eat itself.

The accumulation of wealth will always eventually reach a critical mass where the system itself stops working.

Was I indoctrinated as some kind of proper hardcore Marxist as a kid without realising?

>>23288

And even if the robots DO develop the AI in order to simulate economic activity, how long until THEY start building robots to automate things again because they realised how bullshit it is having to spend their days working for the man, thereby inadvertently bringing about the collapse of their artificially intelligent economy?

Fucking make it stop lads, how far down does it go

>>23288
>Unless the computers made of silicon develop AI complex enough to develop consumerism, the ones made of flesh will always be necessary. There is no economy if nobody's there (or more to the point, nobody can afford) to exchange money for goods and services.
Yeah, that's reminiscent of the old story about the American union boss Walter Reuther being shown around a new automated factory by Henry Ford II:

>“Walter, how are you going to get those robots to pay your union dues,” gibed the boss of Ford Motor Company. Without skipping a beat, Reuther replied, “Henry, how are you going to get them to buy your cars?”

The thing is, what you actually need is demand. You don't necessarily need it to come from workers spending their wages.

>>23288
And no, you're not a hardcore Marxist. The argument you present has come up in the pages of the FT, the Economist, and other decidely non-Marxist publications, and has been brought up by the likes of the right wing economist Laurence Kotlikoff, the venture capitalist Albert Wenger, etc. etc.

>>23288

"The system" doesn't have a purpose, so it can't be said to fail. As you say, it's an emergent product of market forces. If the market determines that there should be a gratuitously wealthy tech elite and a vast underclass, that's what we're stuck with unless there's a revolution. I'm sure that the robots who take all our jobs will efficiently suppress any uprising. In a war between guerrilla fighters and self-aware Predator drones, I'm betting on the drones.

I'm not optimistic about the future.

https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/power-toothpaste-the-first-caffeinated-toothpaste/#/

This exists.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7Ok8UOJ7fY

Here I am, sat in thirty degree heat, and I don't even have a 9/10 Asian bird that does anal to comfort me. I would just bed in for a siesta but I'm supposed to be on a conference call which nobody appears to have set up.

>>23295
I agree about it being too hot to be working. If I was outdoors it wouldn't be too bad but instead I'm stuck at a desk trying to even start focusing when humidity has turned me into a clammy monster. I've done NOTHING today so why did I even try.

The Asian lass can piss off, far too hot for that. Let me at least have a nice dip in a swimming pool and maybe a cold beer.

>>23296

>The Asian lass can piss off

It's not about actually doing the bumsex, it's that she's there for you even for bumsex.

I just had an argument with the missus for going in a hot bath on a day like this. Is it just me that thinks that is fucking mental and a one way ticket to brain damage?

Today's word of the day is "immolation".

>>23298
I had one. Don't see the issue relly, feels exactly the same as a hot bath any other day of the week.

>>23300

We used to do portmanteau of the week.

I can't think of a good one based on your post though. This annoys me.

>>23302
Immogration, the BNP's new policy.

I cut some skinny jeans in half yesterday because the only other shorts I own are from when I was a fatty-fatty-fat-fat. Anyway, I fell asleep for about an hour earlier and the button fell off them.

Also they make me look a bit like a Bavarian rent boy.

Alex Turner and Miles Kane have become an unbearable parody of everything they were against.

It's hard to believe that the lad who penned 'Fake tales of San Francisco' is dancing around with fake tan on in throw back 70s America 'rock n roll' videos trying to be as edgy and as 'look at me I take drugs and do rock music' as possible alongside miles Kane, also the lad who penned 'don't forget who you are' about his beloved home of Liverpool and working clubs.

The Last Shadow Puppets were fantastic, what they've just released is absolute, cringe inducing garbage.

It annoys me how hard these two are trying to be something their not and it annoys me how shit two insanely talented gents are being because they're aiming for a certain image, that will never work for them.

>>23305

Meant to attach this image too, which even if the music video were to be a parody, would still be unbearable. I feel like they're attempting to paint their attempt for a new image as a bit of an overdone joke whilst secretly being a bit serious. Like when somebody is nervous about changing their hairstyle or your mate turns up at the pub wearing a pink blazer jacket hoping it sinks into part of his style unnoticed, but just incase he gets called out he always has his 'it's just a bit of a laugh I'm obviously not serious' excuse to hand.

>>23306
>Like when somebody is nervous about changing their hairstyle
I've been meaning to ask. Do people maintain their hair styles? As in, go to the barbers and ask for the same cut as they had last time?
I've always had varying haircuts because I don't pay attention to what the last one I had was called and just give the barber either vague directions or tell them to do whatever they think would work best.

>>23307

I've been thinking about having a major shake up of my hair for a while but

a) what if it looks shit?
b) How do I know what to ask for? I don't know what to ask for as it is as the same lady has cut my hair for over 20 years, I just sit down and it happens.

This is the only place it's comfortable. Sat on a camping chair, outside, at 23:20. Fuck me. It also appears my phone has adaptive ISO on the rolling shutter. Interesting.

>>23309
There's a screenshot button on your computer; you don't need to take a photograph of it.

>>23310
The picture wasn't just of the laptop.

>>23310
He wanted to include his pussy.

>>23309
I see OkCupid.

>>23314
I am chronically lonely.

>>23317
OkCupid is rife with weirdos with daddy issues, "full-time mums" and other undesirables. Anyone worth your time is on Tinder or something similar. Do yourself a favour and leave it.

>>23319
My experience with tinder has hardly been dissimilar although I admit OKCupid is far worse for it. The only difference seems to be the volume of students but they all tend to be of a sort you'd do well to avoid.

You find keepers by leaving the house. Take all this electronic dating shite and bin it.

>>23320
To be fair, tinder was what allowed me to meet my current missus, we've been together for a solid year.

The premise is very simple; you match with the clear agreement you both find each other attractive (or not physically repugnant), and you can quickly organise a date. My rule was this; I started a conversation with "Hello!", always the same - if she was too good to respond to such an innocuous opener within a few day - fuck it, dropped. I never ever messaged twice, meaning, if I asked a question, and I was left hanging, and for a day or more, then I moved on.
There was nothing more desperate than trying to be an angsty shit - my gf also corroborated this and confirmed she found lads being belligerent extremely unattractive when she was on it.

OkCupid is another game altogether - you have to invest time in building a profile which is a complete waste of time. There is a false notion that this will create conversation material, but it always has and will boil down to attractiveness. I've met lasses on their with terrible pictures but great profiles. Pictures that looked as if they smeared Vaseline over a web-cam from 2001 - I gave them the benefit of the doubt and still agreed for a date. It comes to no surprise then that upon meeting them, they made my stomach drop. To be fair, I'm no model but this was taking the piss. I never did bail, and we had a semi-enjoyable evening, but as soon as they got back on the bus I hastily deleted their numbers and never responded to their messages.

>>23324
there not their...

It's this heat I swear...

>>23324
>I hastily deleted their numbers and never responded to their messages.
That's cold. Why couldn't you just text them something along the lines of "I had a really nice time with you but I'm afraid I didn't feel a spark, sorry".

>>23326
Ok I lied, I did reply to a few along those lines, but the fact of the matter of was that the date was it - no more fannying about.

>>23324
>My rule was this; I started a conversation with "Hello!", always the same

I detest people who try to open a conversation with a lazy line like this. Okay, I reply with 'hello'. Your move master conversationalist.

Either make an observation/relevant question or hoof off. Women are the worst for this and it carries with it an expectation that its all my job which is not what I look for in a partner.

>>23319

My dream woman is a BBW with weird hair, a dry wit and utterly depraved sexual appetites. I have a fantastic time on OkCupid.

>>23332
It's clear you've never bothered to use Tinder or how to carry a conversation m90.

Hello is simple, hello is not presumptuous, hello can be followed by a simple "Hi, how are you?" which leads to a conversation.

How the fuck am I supposed to tailor every greeting to everyone I meet? Are you that desperate and unconfident in your looks/personality that you need to make some hilarious quips about nothing to seem "quirky" and interesting? Get over yourself, Hello is what you get, and if you're above that, then kindly fuck off.

>>23336
Your supposed to look over their profile at least once before you decide to message. Expressing an interest in other people is a must even if its just making chit-chat about the dogs.

Fucking kids playing on the street because their parents are too lazy to take them to a park or let them go play on the MASSIVE FUCKING FIELD that's just around the corner, because they'd rather be able to still sit out in their shorts drinking Stella. Why do we even have such an infestation of children on this street? There's one big family who seem to operate like a hive where there are three generations and several cousins present all day long; and there's another family whose mum seems to be a child minder of sorts bringing yet more mewling brats hereto disturb my peace. The thing is I know it makes me a bit of a misery guts to hate the sound of kids playing outside and getting exercise, but surely it's some sort of anti-social behaviour if it's fucking constant from the moment I get home from work, until about 9pm, and the parents don't even tell them to be quiet when they're sat screaming at each other over who gets to use which fucking ball or whatever.

Great, now one of them is fucking starting with a fucking tantrum. The heat is making me grumpy enough without this bullshit.

People who routinely whine and do so incessantly about the two days of nice weather we get each year.

Get a fucking grip and grow up.

>>23339

I second that.

It seems to me that people who get unhappy about the weather, will get unhappy about anything and everything.

>>23339

Are you sure you're not lost? You do know what country you are in right? Moaning about inane shit is our biggest national pastime.

>>23305

> It's hard to believe that the lad who penned 'Fake tales of San Francisco' is dancing around with fake tan on in throw back 70s America 'rock n roll' videos trying to be as edgy and as 'look at me I take drugs and do rock music'

As much as I used to like QOTSA, it all went pete tong for AM when they met Josh Homme imo.

>>23341

I also hate people that justify things by pretending that they're some sort of quirky brit who can't enjoy nice weather.

Of course we can, otherwise we wouldn't go on holiday.

>>23343

Boiling hot weather is nice when you start drinking at 10am and lounge around a pool all day. It's shit if you've got to stand on the train with a load of sweaty bastards pressed up against you.

>>23343
What's nice about covering yourself in sweat without going anywhere, spending days in pain because you're burnt to a crisp, being unable to sleep for hours, having flies all over the fucking place, sitting there drenched because its so humid and uncomfortable nothing will evaporate?

It's fucking horrible, it's not bloody nice in the slightest.

>>23344
>>23345

Things might not be so bad if slightly warmer weather upsets you this much.

Moan about how the rain and wind makes things shit, or perpetual grey skies are depressing, or cold wintery ice makes everything twice as difficult.

You just all moan about it because you think it's some sort of British right of way and you're really working into the stereotype by spewing such shit.

It's a bit of sun, get over it. If you're spending 'days in pain because you're burnt to a crisp' you're either in need of a medical diagnosis for a skin condition or walking around naked and not applying suncream.

>>23339 nice weather

It's not nice for us, you cretinous fucker. That's why we whine. Or suck it up and pray for it to end soon.
Either way, it's 'nice' like being kicked in the balls repeatedly is 'nice'. Brain shuts down, cycling around gets me sweaty, every fucking thing is hot to the touch. Just foul. Tolerable on holiday when I'm not trying to get things done, but I'd still rather not.
I love winter. Can't get enough of snow, bright cold days, driving rain, wind, all of it. But people whine about that.

>>23343

I hate people meta-complaining about people complaining because they think they are so much more free-thinking and rational for not sharing opinions with other groups of people.

>>23348

Cool input.

>>23347
You're all acting like we've just inhabited the weather of Saudi Arabia on a permanent basis and we're not having a bit of sun for two days.

Honest to god, you don't have to like it, but this over dramatisation of how bad it is is fucking pathetic.

As I said, you all need to get a grip.

>>23349
Maybe it affects different people to a different extent?
Maybe it really is fucking horrible for some people?
Sure, whining's not going to fix it, but can't you just live with a bit of whining for a few days?

>>23350

Yes, obviously it will, but I strongly doubt that most people aren't being burnt to a crisp and being in agony for days.

I don't like the rain, I don't act like a second biblical flood is about to come and wash away my house, because I'm not pathetic.

Do a whinge, by all means, but at least stop this yank extremism where everything has to be the absolute best or worst.

>>23319
>>23320
>>23324
I tried Tinder, swiped right on every bird I found even vaguely attractive (so 85%, I heard that if you make it 100 you don't get shown to anyone) for about 3 weeks, so that's 2100 people.
Zero matches.

Is it too much to ask for this heat to be spread over several decent days instead of one or two unbearably hot and humid ones?

>>23353
I think that's the thing too -- 30ºC in Maga with the lads is different to 30ºC here.

The houses in those countries are built to make it bearable, whereas houses in this country are built to trap heat in. It's incredibly humid, moreso than you would get even at the coast in the Med, and unlike the Yanks we don't have any aircon.

I looked down at my foot and it's been bleeding, it must have been for quite a while judging by the amount of blood. Anyway, I was blissfully unaware of this and now I've looked at it it won't stop stinging.

>>23346
>Moan about how the rain and wind makes things shit, or perpetual grey skies are depressing, or cold wintery ice makes everything twice as difficult.
Not the lad you're responding to, but - I don't moan in those cases. I'm fine with rain, snow, or just cloudy grey days. It's this heat I can't fucking cope with. Other cunts go on about how "miserable" the weather is at all other times of the year, I reckon I get to complain during the few roasting bastards we get during summer.

"Moan" fucking ticked.

>>23354
I'm working from home most of the time at the moment. I was in the air-conditioned office today when the outside temperature was only 25, whereas yesterday I had to ask my manager's permission for a siesta because the temperature in my living room was 31 degrees on account of there being no wind whatsoever. (To be fair, I was taking it anyway, and had he said no I'd have told him to go swivel.)

>>23356
Entirely.

There's a lot in Watching the English about the use of the weather as a conversational device which is a fascinating reflection but for me it simply has no place here.

Today it was fucking horrible. The day before it was fucking horrible. The day before it was fucking horrible and I'm moaning because it hasn't been fucking horrible as far as I'm concerned for a lovely long time.

Another thing to consider is the THSW index -- Temperature, Humidity, Solar (Radiation), Wind. It's basically a 'feels like' as compared to some standard conditions. Because it's so humid here, and there wasn't a lot of wind, and we get a fair amount of solar radiation (~1000Wm^-2 on a good day), it 'feels' a lot higher than it is. The attached graph shows yesterday it was brushing 40.

This historical data is on a few hours' lag, but you can see what it was like.

[x] autism because this really is

>>23360
To continue, the reason why it's not as bad in the evenings even when the temperature hasn't dropped as much is because it's starting to dry out.
Relative humidity is a weird fucking unit though.

>>23361
>Relative humidity is a weird fucking unit though.

Is it? My understanding is that it's just a percentage of water vapour with the saturation amount being 100%. Seems simple enough to me?

Few weeks ago my phone was telling me the humidity was in the 95-100% range. I can deal with anything up to about 90% but anything above that can fuck right off, the air seems too thick to breathe at that point. The excellent news is that climate change will apparently lead to greater humidity in future as the oceans warm up, I'm definitely going to have to invest in decent A/C if that happens.

>>23363
>I'm definitely going to have to invest in decent A/C if that happens.
Thus accelerating climate change.


And yes, but the way it must be calculated (as a function of temperature and pressure) means you can't compare, say, the RH at this point last year accurately because, well, it's relative. I suppose, like Fahrenheit, it's an easily relatable unit, since giving it in gm^-3 as an absolute value wouldn't mean shit to people.

The 'ideal' is 60%, apparently.

>>23360
Where it this from?

>>23365
http://ossettweather.com/Weekly%20page.htm
I'm one of the scarily numerous Ossettlads on here.

>>23246
Earlier this evening, "People without talent on talent shows" was suggested for Room 101. I agree that such people are indeed annoying, but I couldn't help but feel it was a bit rich coming from Jordan.

I have flu. It's fucking July.

>>23368
Sorry to hear that man. Flu is nasty, not surprised you can't sleep.

>>23369
Im lying in bed shivering. I keep coughing and I'm bloody annoyed about it.

>>23366
I think there's only the two of us. The manure smell the other morning was almost unbearable.

I think the otherlad lives in Earlsheaton.

>>23371
That means 66% of the site is Ossettlads, and purple lives in Earlsheaton.

If that attempted kidnapping does turn out to be a great white whale hunt, we really do have properly shit terrorists.

>>23373
Either that or top-notch security services.

>>23375

Nah, any moron could drive their Fiesta across a pavement and take out a few Kafir and MI5 couldn't do a thing about it. But England's terrorists can't even shout orders at a jogging Squadie because he had headphones on, so it seems.

>>23376
If that was true why haven't they done it already, like they did in France?

>>23377

Exactly.

These fucking useless twats. Not only have I had a massive surprise bill that they refuse to change but I was meant to get my housemates added onto the account last week so they can call in.

I thought I did but as it turns out today when my housemate called the customer service agent simply didn't. I know it happened because I remember the first agent I got through to fucking hung up on me halfway through the call.

>>23379
Why are you still with them?

>>23380
I thought it was just me getting these weird suggestions lately because I cleared my cookies. You also seeing the one about celebrities being made to take on roles they hated?

They got me with the thumbnail of Emily Blunt

>>23381
It was written into my tenancy agreement so I was stuck with them. I am not with them any more though. Fuck that. Never again.

Do you ever just realise how utterly buggered and depressing your life is and that you're always doomed to fail at any and all attempts to improve it?

>>23384

Daily. Realising this is the start of freedom though.

>>23385
Suicide is not the answer sometimes.

>>23382
No, I just get that one and something like "9 unsolved creepy internet mysteries".

>>23380
>>23387
I get these too. About a year ago I got a 6 hour video of the Titanic sinking suggested on every video.

Did you also recently get "How I can afford a Lambo"? I watch a lot of car videos so it might have been a tailored advert 'suggestion'.

>>23388
"Richard Dawkings stunned by stupidity" too.

>>23389
I get that one occasionally but not as often.

>>23387>>23388

I've recently discovered the tiny little button that lets you select "not interested" and then "tell us why". Using it to clear up all my recommendations daily does seem to help keep the shite out. But even then I still get these fucking sponsored ones.

>>23390
I'm sick of seeing recommendations for videos of politicians or concepts apparently being 'destroyed' by John Oliver, Jon Stewart, Steven Colbert, Bill Maher etc. etc. etc.

>>23391
It's going to show me something whatever happens.

>>23392
Users of hyperbole destroyed by this post.

Out of knowhere, a sponsored ad in my facebook newsfeed that invited me to like Theresa May, with no other options. It wouldn't initially let me select to block all further contact from Theresa May.

I fucking hate Facebook.

>>23391
This only works if you sign into your youtube account. I get that its my own fault then but google knows enough about me already.

>>23395
Why not use AdBlock like a normal human being?

>>23392
These irritate me to no fucking end. Why does a political spectrum have to be either extreme? I can't fucking stand smarmy "presenters" using god awful quips that usually appeal to the lowest common denominator (i.e.: American audiences).

Youtube is designed so that you are glued to it - it recommends you stuff that it knows will keep you hooked for hours. I have adblock permanently on, I don't give a shit who gets the ad revenue, because there are 10 million other people lining their pockets.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn_6sU7O43w

Why is this cancer spreading to the UK? I thought this sort of vlog shite was relegated to the US where they love plastering their faces in front of a camera.

>>23396

Sign in, then disable your watch history in your account settings. No more personalised recommendations.

https://myaccount.google.com/privacy

If you really want to avoid tracking, install Ghostery. It's not perfect, but it's as good as it gets.

https://www.ghostery.com/our-solutions/ghostery-browser-extension/

>>23397
Fucking hell, I could only take twenty seconds of that video.

My friend's insistence that 4 weeks = 1 month.

As the standard pregnancy term is classed as 40 weeks she claims she was pregnant for 10 months. Anyway, she's been banging on about her baby being half a year old today because it was born 24 weeks ago today, which would make the 4th of February exactly six months ago in her mind. Whether she celebrates its first birthday an entire 28 days early remains to be seen.

>>23400
Fuck off with your gregorionormative agenda.

>>23398
What are your thoughts on Ghostery vs Privacy Badger?

I never, ever, tell Google/Facebook/etc that I'm 'not interested' in anything -- it allows them to build an ever more accurate profile of you. I have 'trending' shit about football coming up. I hate football.

>>23403
This is true - if you see online adverts you haven't the slightest interest in, it means your attempts to protect your privacy are working like a charm.

I'm haunted by a girl in my dreams. I must have only met her once and she left a mark, we talked a few times online after that but then she disappeared. She really might as well be on Mars for all my chance of seeing her again.

Now I dream about her with some regularity. I can forget about her completely in my day-day affairs and life moves on but then she turns up in a dream causing feelings of longing or what perfectly describes it 'saudade'. Ex-girlfriends rarely if ever come up nor any of the other the ones that got away, its just her.

I guess I'm stuck with her forever now but it would be nice if every dream wasn't awful. Last night it was my birthday (not really but in dreamland) but I was upset because I had no money and nobody else seemed to care so I didn't feel confident to talk to her.

*ring ring*
PLEASE LISTEN CAREFULLY TO THE FOLLOWING MESSAGE


I'm on the TPS and shit, so I've no idea how they get my details.

>>23406

I drafted a standard letter for shit like this. I started to track down the company and threaten legal action and report them to the Information Commissioners Office.

I don't get them anymore.

>>23397
Let me be clear - I love The Daily Show and its insightful taking apart of hypocrisy in the media. I think we should have stuff like this in the UK and it is to the detriment of our political discourse that we don't:

https://youtu.be/mNiqpBNE9ik

But not everyone and everything is 'destroyed' by these commentators. I do agree with you about your notions of how everything is divided into extremes. But I don't consider Jon Stewart, for one, to indulge in this kind of bullshit - he's called for open dialogue and understanding before.

>>23379

I feel your pain brother.

It winds me up doubly thanks to my previous life working n customer service. I have seen first hand how all the procedures, management structure, and escalation routes are rigged to make it not just hard for the customer, but hard for even the most well meaning phone monkey to successfully deliver the outcome you require (when that outcome is anything other than giving the company money.)

It's appalling how the consumer has so little recourse available to them when the majority of big companies like this deliver customer service so bad that the whole business mode verges on being on an elaborate con. If anybody here has ever tried to cancel a TalkTalk subscription, they know exactly what I mean.

>>23404
I hate the Bong Bong Bong, and couldn't give a fuck about superhero films. My guess is that everyone will see the Munich story.

I'd say they know nothing. I have Adblock and NoScript, and make sure addthis (notorious tracking site) is always blocked. Facebook disconnect, too.

>>23408
>I think we should have stuff like this in the UK and it is to the detriment of our political discourse that we don't
Isn't that what HIGNFY and Mock The Week are? Comedians commentating politics and news?

>>23416

>Mock The Week

Alright lad, you've had your fun. Move on.

>>23417
One day you're going to cut yourself on those edges.

>>23418
Mock the Week is shit.

>>23419
Well, if you must insist then at least go down the road, not across the street.

>>23419
I don't know as I don't watch it, but that's really irrelevant to whether or not it plays a similar function to The Daily Show.

>>23420

What?

>>23421

>but that's really irrelevant to whether or not it plays a similar function to The Daily Show

It doesn't. You'd had to be soft in the head to think otherwise.

>>23416
>HIGNFY
No, because the only incisive commentary comes from occasional rants from Hislop, as though he's reading from a copy of his magazine he has in front of him. The rest is just cheap gags, half past two etc.

>Mock The Week
Get out.

>"OK, 'Two Weeks', what do we think that is? Frankie?"
>"Es it haow long it teks George Boosh tae get ah cloo?"
>Audience: HAHAHAHAHAHA THIS IS SATIRE

>>23423
I refer you to >>23420 for the correct orientation for your sharp edges.

>>23423
Just because you don't like the shows doesn't mean they're not essentially the same thing.

>>23426
They're not, though. Both are panel shows, and essentially lighthearted and flippant in their treatment of news (and Mock the Week is mostly sub-Whose Line Is It Anyway bits that have nothing to do with the news). Neither has anything like the long-form monologue or moral outrage of The Daily Show, Last Week Tonight etc at their best. I think that channel 4 thing with Charlie Brooker and David Mitchell was an attempt at a British version, but it died on its arse from what I remember.

I find the Daily Show to be more of an expanded version if the Facebook hugbox.

>>23427
They're shows consisting of comedians commenting on current events. That makes them essentially the same. Yes, there are differences but that's always going to be true. Maybe it would make sense if you said "I wish some of our current events shows were less lighthearted or flippant".

I imagine you're talking about 10 O'Clock Live, which went on for 33 episodes. I'm sure I can pull the same no-true-scotsman as you and find differences between that and The Daily Show too.

>>23424

This whole "edges" bollocks is the biggest /101/ going. You should be ashamed of yourself you unthinking, unoriginal, shit yank meme stealing, cunt.

>>23427
Yeah I made this point in the 10 O'Clock Live thread in /v/. It wished it was The Daily Show.

>>23430
Mate 10 O'Clock Live really did try to do what it is that I'm saying the UK should have. But the problems involved were that Jimmy Carr did the same stupid autocued gags he does everywhere else, David Mitchell ed a semi-serious discussion that always pointed out the obvious and broke no ground whatsoever, and Lauren Laverne's role was unknown/superfluous. Brooker was the best thing about it and the closest it came to The Daily Show - amusing commentary and mashups of the media and current affairs. But he does that stuff on his other shows anyway, and worse he doesn't do them daily. Weekly Wipe isn't even weekly. It's six episodes a year.

>>23433

What is Charlie doing at the moment now, anyway? I know another Black Mirror is coming up around Christmas, and he does his annual shows, but aside from a few 140 character twats he's been very secretive.

>>23434
I guess he's compiling the Cosmos-length epic that is going to be this year's Wipe.

>>23428
I'm in the same boat.

American politics shows are just full of misinformed shouting from unqualified people that I don't want to see in this country. Just look at John Oliver making a complete bellend of himself by taking Laibach at face value:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yeygA-n7AEo

>>23434
I imagine he has his hands full with the young kids and fucking his fit wife. The complete bastard.

>>23436
John Oliver is shite though. He's always been shite. He's like if Marcus Brigstocke realised he couldn't cut it on the circuit over here and found he had an audience of idiots in America that he could make even less of an effort with.

Just because some of these comedic commentators are rubbish doesn't mean they all are. I repeat, we need a Jon Stewart over here. Intelligent, informed, insightful.

>>23437
>John Oliver is shite though. He's always been shite.
Yet somehow he's managed to land his own show with sufficiently high ratings for HBO not to have cancelled it. It's almost as if the opinion of some random person on the internet might not accord with people that actually know what they're doing.

>>23437
Has Jon Stewart ever said anything that went against the grain?

Go ahead, I'll wait.

>>23438
James Corden is also successful over there. James Corden.

>>23439
What's that supposed to mean?

>>23439
I see a no-true-scotsman in your future.

>>23440
You mean one of the creators and writers of Gavin and Stacey managed to be successful? Blimey. Next you'll be telling me that John Cleese went on to do something funny after Python.

>>23441
>>23442
There are a number of claims being made that he is "intelligent, informed and insightful" I'd like to see some proof of that.

Fact is he is an entertainer who presents views and gags that conform with his audience to get maximum claps-per-minute. There is some irony in that given he has traditionally railed against the partisan nature of American society. That doesn't make him a horrible person but for example Stewart Lee will give what can be unpopular opinions against his audience and he deserves credit for it because it sets his comedy apart.

>>23444
There you go pretending to know better again.

>>23445
Might need to work on your retorts m9.

>>23444
Is this the same Stewart Lee who in one of his routines said "I'm not interested in laughs, what I'm aiming for is a temporary mass liberal consensus"?

>>23447

After which everyone laughed.

Yes, it is very hot, and yes, the weather was quite different quite recently, please stop telling me about it every 18 seconds.

>>23447

Stewart Lee is proficient but vacuous. He preaches to the choir and flatters the intelligence of his audience. This is what a genuinely subversive comedian looks like:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwMBGWfVSiY

>>23450

>genuinely subversive

Modern day Trotsky alright.

>>23450
That is not subversive, Louis CK works on shock humour like almost all American comedians.

>>23452

Shock humour is something else entirely; study the work of Lisa Lampanelli if you can't see the difference. In this routine Louis CK is inviting the audience to empathise with nonces. That's the punchline - the audience are presented a plausible, logically consistent argument that forces them to relate to people that they loathe. Like all of CK's work, it's fundamentally existential. He finds meaning in the darkest recesses of humanity, in a manner that is understandable to a mainstream audience. Attempting that on a chat show is utterly audacious; succeeding at it is utterly brilliant.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=08ITsgiL6v8

>>23450

Ah, yes, the Louis CK "Nonces like to nonce" bit. I still remember the first time I heard it. It was like Lady Dianna's death, the bombing of Hiroshima and the November 9th attacks all rolled into one. Truly a bit that will live in infamy.

The "word porn" page on Facebook. I'm currently shitting and hence on my mobile so I can't type out the full length rant I'd like to, but fuck it.

"OH LOOK AT ME I'M SO FUCKING #DEEP I'M SUCH A FUCKING #NERD WHO LIKES WORDS".

Fuck you, go back to watching the Big Bang Theory and thinking you're smart rather than shitting up my Facebook with this inane shit.

>>23455

Completely agreed.

It's the same with every major political event, everybody, I mean everybody, suddenly becomes a constitutional expert and just posts utter drivel.

Really, really winds me up. Pseudo intellectuals should just off themselves. I know half of britfa.gs would be gone but it's a sacrifice I'm willing to take.

People who use fagbook and whine about their fagbook grievances on britfa.gs.

(A good day to you Sir!)

>>23457

Is this a new theme now? We complain about the people complaining on here?

Already it's quite boring.

>>23457
People who whine about other people whining.

>>23457

>Fagbook

Are you taking the piss?

>>23455

On that note, 'porn' as a description for just about any interest presented visually is a vulgar and annoying habit. Food porn, bike porn, car porn, etc.

See also:
- 'Eargasm'
- People who become overenthusiastic about particular foods
- Calling yourself a 'nerd' because your have more than a passing interest in any topic to ever exist

>>23457
Lad. Look at the title of this thread, then politely fuck off.

Adding to the Facebook grievance theme, this cunt. He's not an actual celebrity, so he had to put a fake tick on his name, and he posts the most banal, reach improving, shit -- 'tag your friend so they have to look at a picture of a spoon' -- it increases his reach and revenue. I always see them when I'm on my phone, so I've only just got around to blocking the wanker.

Today I've spent fuck knows how long trying to solve the problem of why my dishwasher wasn't draining properly. Checking the pipes for blockages or knots, tasks which take considerably longer as it's a built in unit rather than a freestanding one. Only then does my girlfriend, the one who insisted I drop everything to solve the problem that very second and blamed me for it happening by claiming I hadn't rinsed the dishes enough before putting them in, mention that she'd turned off the dishwasher and unloaded it a few minutes before the end of the previous cycle because she's a dopey cunt it looked done and she didn't see what difference it'd make. Turned it on again, programmed a new cycle and the first thing it did was drain the water away.

>>23463

On the bright side, you know your dishwasher a little bit better and I'm sure your girlfriend owes you a blowie for the mistake.

Your shit Chow-Mein I expressly told you I didn't want any of is in no way equal to the delicious special fired rice I ordered, so eating the rest of my order then leaving half of yours is not okay, okay, prick/mum?

I just had a degenerate bath because I decided to get a KFC whilst it was running (risky, I know, what if there was traffic?) and sat and ate it whilst in the bath.

The dog started scratching the door so I had no choice but to let it in because it was going mental over the chicken.

My dog just watched me eat KFC in the bath and now I feel weird.


I've also tried watching the Thick of It, which has been utterly shite so far, and I love a good politics show.

New Robot Wars. Dara is no Craig Charles and the lighting is really getting on my tits. Same for the camera shots. I've watched the original on Challenge recently so I'm not looking at this with rose-tinted nostalgia goggles.

>>23466
I think you got the wrong thread.

>>23468

Both of those things were minor piss offs for me.

>>23469

Could it be that we on .gs live such miserable lives that our weekend plans are indistinguishable from our petty grievances?

>>23466
Did you try to watch The Thick of It in an attempt to feel more sophisticated after letting your dog watch you eat KFC in the bath?

>>23471

Letting your dog watch you eat KFC in the bath does sound like something that would happen at the end of The Thick of It.

Glenn washes the stink of scandal from himself after a truly disastrous day. On the radio, Eddie Mair is asking a junior minister whether resignation is the only dignified outcome. A half-eaten pot of coleslaw bobs about in the bathwater like a coracle full of shredded cabbage. A doleful spaniel watches the dismal scene with a vague expression of shame, hoping for a scrap of chicken. Glenn drops the baked beans, mutters "Oh, fuck it", fade to black.

>>23468

I'm with them on the annoying dog thing.

My parents have an insecure shit of a dog who gives this shrill howl unless it gets constant attention. It needs to learn boundaries but it doesn't because they give into the bad behavior every time.

>>23473
My parents do exactly the same. Every time someone leaves the house it goes fucking mental. It will steal food off plates.

It's weird, they had no problem beating me as a kid, but they won't touch the dog.

>>23474
Have you pointed that out to them?

>>23475
I've pointed out that the dog is a little shit and they need to control it. It's not my dog though so I don't even try, I actually get a little schadenfreude when it shits on the rug.

>>23476
No, I meant their hypocrisy in their treatment of you and the dog.

>>23477
I wouldn't get anywhere, so there's no point in trying. They can't unsmack my arse or go back in time to train the dog properly when it was a puppy.

>>23473

My mum got her first dog when I was in my late teens. I found it genuinely upsetting, because I saw her make all the same mistakes she made with me.

Jesus, a 'I ate KFC in the bath with the dog watching' post really brought out a few repressed feelings here.

>>23480
I feel we've come full circle back to this post >>23470.


On the note of rants about parents. Mine are having a massively self indulgent event for their 40th wedding anniversary. Complete with probably a hundred guests, church rituals about how great they are, and lasting in excess of 7 hours. And certainly me being co-opted into helping out. It's one thing to have a party, but to make people watch through a church service first, to me screams self absorbed.

I don't even like them, and I can't understand why anyone would make such a public display of what is ultimately a personal thing. Actually I do. It is because it's a fucking sham, they hate each other, but they are both too proud to get a divorce, and I think they believe if the lie they are happy is public it is more true, and now I get to witness the greatest over compensating for sunk cost since the Vietnam war.

I'm a lonely cunt and really struggled maintaining friends late in uni and afterwards in the first bit out of it. My school/ A-level mates all but abandoned me.

In the space of about a week six different people from different groups I have hung out with at various points have asked me if I'd like to go for a pint or go for a night out/ do something.

I'm starting to wonder if a newspaper has accidentally misprinted a picture of me as a euromillions winner.


Now the problem is I can't meet all of them due to time commitments and even though I'll offer to meet at a different point it just looks like I'm giving a gentle 'no thanks.'

For fuck sake.

>>23482

>Now the problem is I can't meet all of them due to time commitments and even though I'll offer to meet at a different point it just looks like I'm giving a gentle 'no thanks.'

It'll be fine. If you can make firm plans for a later date then do so, otherwise just remember to keep in touch.

>>23482
I don't think it does if you offer a specific alternative.

Steam games in "early access" that also have DLC.

Webinars. They're like being in a very boring meeting with Max Headroom.

I'm currently reading a bit about the BHS collapse and the pension fund malarkey, and I'm getting wound up at how people are discussing it.

It's like, a pension fund is money that employees contribute out of their wages, it's something that should be outrageous in the first place if a company just decides "You know what I think we'll just spend your retirement, it's okay it's an investment lol". And yet here we are with people who have paid into that fund their whole lives having their pension endangered, but the discussion already framed as "well you win some you lose some, that's business lol".

>>23487

Pension funds have to be invested somewhere, otherwise they'd just get eroded away by inflation.

The problem with pension shortfalls comes with defined-benefit schemes. If your pension scheme promises "we'll pay you two-thirds of your final salary for life, adjusted for inflation", that's very difficult to plan for. You don't know how long people are going to live for, what the stock market will do or what will happen to inflation.

The BHS pension scheme closed to new members in 2005, but it's in severe financial difficulty because of increasing life expectancies and poor performance in the stock market. The amounts that had been paid in by members simply weren't enough to sustainably cover the amounts being paid out. BHS were propping up the pension scheme, but can no longer do so because they're insolvent.

84% of final salary pension schemes are running at a deficit, with the total deficits amounting to £383bn. This isn't just about BHS, but about an unsustainable pension system. Thousands of companies are burdened with decades-old pensions arrangements that they're having to subsidise. We were all taken by surprise by rapidly increasing life expectancies and a slow economy.

An extreme example is General Motors, who have a global pension shortfall of around $21bn. They have contributed $9.2bn to the fund over the last five years from company funds; they have recently borrowed $2bn to keep the fund afloat. These pension liabilities were a major factor in their 2009 bankruptcy.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-36880230
http://seekingalpha.com/article/3976982-general-motors-pension-problem