If I'm making cheese scones and the recipe calls for about 150ml of milk but it turns out I don't have any, will two eggs suffice instead or should I try something else?

>>456001

Replacing the milk with (more?) eggs would probably make them more like biscuits or dense pancakes than scones. Can you not pop to the shop?

Your image inspired me to have a nostalgia wank to an old 90s workout video, but I realised that these days I'm only really attracted to the "before" photos. I think there are loads of fat lasses who do yoga on YouTube, so I might have a crack at that.

I spent a good portion of last week slagging off French people to my missus, and vehemently denying that they have more in common with the English than we'd like to admit. Nobody tell her I've eaten a full baguette and wedge of brie for my dinner today.

Today I turn 37 and feel like i'm turning to dust.

>>456005
Happy Birthday, you're beautiful.

>>456003
I was going to use a Saturday morning kid's TV show for the OP pic, either Live & Kicking, Fully Booked, Sub Zero or even Cartoon Critters, but the resolution was too low.

I'd forgotten how fit Gail Porter was in her prime, though.

>>456007

You can't win lad, I'm having a nostalgia wank over that tasty chav poodle slag now too.

>>456008
Fleur was not a chav.

>>456009

I'm pretty sure she had a sort of Essex slag voice like Billie Piper's in Doctor Who. Am I mixing it up with something else?

Same thing I do every week(end). Fuck all.

>>456007
When did the boy dog get a girlfriend? I don't recall any female dogs on Space Vets. Admittedly I was under 10 at the time, but I immediately recognised Space Vets so I can't be totally racked with amnesia.

>>456012
>>456010

I'm mostly spending the weekend in a fog of anxiety and depression. I had a few pints last night and today I can't shake the feeling that I've done something wrong but the consequences have yet to double back to me. Easily the worst thing about getting older is drinking stopping being fun enough to warrant all the shit that comes with it.

>>456005
Happy birthday, lad.

>>456014
If I have a couple of pints I'll end up with a terrible headache a few hours later. If I drink I have to get bladdered because I can't enjoy a light tipsy buzz enough for it to be worth it anymore.

>>456013

See, I was right. It's not quite what we'd identify as a "chav" in the modern sense, but she's definitely not meant to be an upper class bird is she.

>>456016

Not sure that counts as "right".

>>456014
>>456015

I just find that most things in general get less fun as you get older. It's like how your eyesight gets worse and your memory starts going dodgy, your very sense of enjoyment starts to dull.

For me that's definitely lead down the road of trying lots of drugs and reckless behaviour and all that. Thankfully I've never become a junkie or alkie, because it's only ever seemed increasingly futile to spaff more and more money on booze, pills and shite coke, but I really miss the days you could have the time of your life with nowt but about four cans and a couple of your mates when you were 19.

I can see why people get fat as they get older too, because food is one of the few things that doesn't really get old. Not that I excuse them for it, but I get it.

>>456017

Listen it's my wank fantasy alright. She's wearing pink Adidas trackies and hoop earrings, and offers me half her Strongbow and a blowie for a couple of roll-ups.

>>456019
Did you ever watch Mongrels? It had an almost identical dog.

I fancied painting some Warhammer today. Haven't touched any in over a year now because of my cramped living situation, but by the time I've got everything tidied up and done a few odd-jobs it's already nearly dark and I can't be arsed. Oh well.

I think I'll count it as progress if I've at least got the half-painted ones out and put them in view. I'll probably go through my paints and stuff, see if any of them have dried up and order replacements, then I've committed financially to the idea as well; which will spur me on to do some on my next day off.

>>456021
Can you not just rehydrate the old paints with water or some solvent?

>>456022

I think you can do it, but whenever I've tried it before it's a huge hassle and they don't come out right.

I'll generally keep them if they are a bit lumpy or thick, and just add a bit more medium in then stick them on the spinny thing at work for a few minutes, but if they're dry, fuck it. It's only a couple of quid a pot.

>>456000
OP, you have triggered nostalgia in me. I liked the Gladiators as a 7 year old in 1991, I even had an official Gladiators notepad and pencil.

Years later we got Barbarian for the C64 which came with a fold out full colour poster of the barbarian, who was modelled by Wolf from the Gladiators.

>>456024
I've probably posted this before, but I went to see Wolf in panto in the mid-nineties, 1996 as a guess. He'd recently done an episode of Shooting Stars where Vic and Bob kept calling him Wilf, so loads of dads kept shouting Wilf at him during the performance. He genuinely got quite pissed off about it.

>>456025
The White Power Ranger is dead now, isn't he? Much like the power he represented.

>>456027

Hanged himself after an argument with his wife that definitely wasn't about whether he was a closet bumder.

>>456025
"Introducing Rising Comedy Star". Embarrassing.

>>456036
I'd say it's preferable to being known as 'Nutty Neil'.

>>456037
I don't understand who these are targeting. Alvin Stardust, Wolf and the gay power ranger okay, they're appealing to various nostalgia and banking on their semi-fame but Neil isn't famous for anything at all, they almost never are. It's just some bloke and some woman being presented as though they're a USP of that particular panto. Is there some cult underground where their names mean something to people?

>>456024
I was more interested in Maria Whittaker in the gold bikini myself.

>>456038
Some actors carve out a bit of niche on the panto circuit, especially if they're playing one of the funny roles. The dad from Topsy & Tim has been the panto dame in Wakefield for at least 10 years now, so he's always got that bit of steady work he can fall back on.

>>456025
I read that as the Skeleton Hooper Juveniles which sounds like an undead hooligan firm.

Foggy out.

Freezing my plums off as it were

Kiri Pritchard-McLean absolutely smashed it on Live at the Apollo.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001h9r9/live-at-the-apollo-series-17-episode-4

I don't like smokers to be honest. I'm sure not all smokers are this way but I will never understand people that have no qualms about lighting up a cigarette or similar on a busy walkway, outside at a nice cafe or in some sort of situation where others will be negatively impacted by their vile habit.

I also see more smokers than I'd like to just throwing their ends on the floor outside their offices or similar when they're done.

It's a disgusting habit and they always seem weirdly defensive of it.

>>456131

>I don't like smokers
>they always seem weirdly defensive of it

I wonder why.

You already make us stand out in the pissing rain, but apparently even that isn't sufficient any more. We don't make fake theatrical coughing noises when you drive past in a plume of NOx and particulate emissions. Some of us switched to vaping because it's basically harmless, but then you complain about how we smell like cake and pot pourri. It's almost as if some people just hate to see people getting unearned dopamine.

>>456132
Strawman because I don't own a car and feel similar about cars too, but also they don't create such a strong reaction as concentrated smoke does from a smoker.

Sorry you have to stand out in the rain, I guess we'll all just breathe your poison fumes because you don't want to get wet whilst you do it.

Can't wait for it to be banned full stop.

>>456131
>but I will never understand people that have no qualms about lighting up a cigarette or similar on a busy walkway, outside at a nice cafe or in some sort of situation where others will be negatively impacted by their vile habit.

They're drug addicts mate.

>>456132
I don't care about vaping, but fag smoke is foul, and it lingers.

I forget when and where a couple of you were complaining about obviously vegan things being superfluously labled as such, but unless I'm missing something this has got to be the pinnacle of the genre. Did we used to throw pigs into smelters to get a better finish on the metal?

Zizek has a good take about smokers. In essence we make up all these excuses about how it's a vile disgusting habit, smells foul, and so on and so on, but that's not really what it is at all. It's that we, the goody goody non-smokers, non-drug users, who try not to drink too much, who try to eat our five-a-day and get our 2000 steps in, who join a gym every January and cancel every March- We hate seeing someone who sticks their middle finger up to all that and says "Fuck you. I am enjoying a simple vice, and I don't have to hide it. It's not healthy, and I don't care, I enjoy it." That breaks every taboo of the modern health conscious lifestyle. We envy them, because we are ashamed of ourselves when we stuff that cheesecake down, in secret, at 11 o'clock on a Sunday night because we're depressed about going back to work. They're not ashamed of enjoying life's simple pleasures. We're jealous.

I know a lot of people shit on Witcher 3 combat, but I don't get why. It's not the smoothest or most satisfying, but it does its job. I play so many RPGs, Witcher 3's combat doesn't really stand out as particularly shit.

>>456133

>Can't wait for it to be banned full stop.

If you want smoking banned outright, then you are going to have to seriously entertain my idea of sending fatties to fitness gulags.

It's easy to avoid and ignore smokers, but you can't chuck a fatty out of the pub for sitting in your line of sight, can you.

>>456138

Sometimes Zizek's ramblings strike upon a truth and sometimes he just underestimates how rank I find cigarette stink.

>>456138

I don't find this insightful at all. There's loads of behaviours that are defiantly irresponsible, like heavy drinking or hard drug use. To say that we don't like them because it subverts some social norm, rather than that it's genuinely unpleasant or destructive, doesn't seem to be based on anything other than Zizek's latest brainfart.

I say this as someone that used to smoke and doesn't have a problem with smokers. It does smell terrible, and it is ludicrously bad for your health in the long-term. I do accept that the act of smoking itself is enjoyable, though, both physically and psychologically.

>>456142

Nah, I think it's a pretty uniquely applicable insight to smoking in particular. Smoking is the only one that, while people dislike it, you still CAN do it in public, and that's part of the enjoyment a smoker gets out of it. It's a small act of rebellion to light up at the bus stop, knowing there's some uptight arsehole stood three feet down from you who disapproves, but can't really voice it.

I'd compare it more closely to being fat. It's like our resident chubby chaser said- A fat lass is visibly displaying that she likes to indulge her desires. But with smoking, there are no outward signals, unless you have the fag in your hand. It's terribly unhealthy on the inside, but it doesn't spoil your image, so in a way you get to have your cake and eat it.

I think it's especially true when you consider vaping. Vaping proves the hypothesis. It's much,much healthier than smoking, and it doesn't have any of the other unpleasant side effects, the smells are actively designed to be pleasant instead of offensive. Only a completely unreasonable person would hate vaping/vapers based on the act itself, because there couldn't possibly BE a more reasonable alternative.

But that's not what anyone does hate. They just hate someone else enjoying themselves in a way they feel, for whatever reason, unable to, and they can only be satisfied by the idea of depriving that person of their pleasure.

>>456143
Vape flavours do reek, like those plug-in perfume things reek.
Sure, some people apparently like both, but doing them where they're not welcome is the nasal equivalent of keying my car. It's a cunt's trick.
Vape yourself into a coma, with my absolute blessing, but I'm never going to be pleased that the air reeks of synthetic strawberry.

>>456143

>I think it's especially true when you consider vaping. Vaping proves the hypothesis.

Also a lot of people believe that vaping must be terribly harmful, despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary. The protestant-capitalist mindset refuses to accept the possibility of an unearned pleasure that doesn't come with some kind of punishment.

I've noticed something similar in the reaction to Prof. David Nutt's Sentia, a new drink that gets you mildly tipsy but isn't harmful to your health and doesn't give you a hangover. It's obviously a big step forward for harm reduction and public health, but some people feel that it's just wrong in some way, that if you don't get a hangover you aren't paying the appropriate pennance for a good time.

https://sentiaspirits.com/pages/gaba-spirits

Anyone tried that sentia stuff then? How's it getting past the demented psychoactive substances law?
Anyway, nice shilling, order placed.

>>456145
>Designed by a world-renowned team of botanists, innovators, and scientists, SENTIA’s unique blend of powerful, plant-based ingredients are scientifically proven to activate ‘GABA’ in the brain

Oh yeah?
I've seen crypto-payment-only nootropic vendors who offer more research citations than this website.

>>456147

Professor Nutt is the neuropsychopharmacologist. The marketing materials for Sentia can only make very vague claims, because of the risk of being classified as a psychoactive substance (and therefore automatically illegal) rather than a food. There's lots of things they'd like to put into Sentia and lots of things they'd like to say about it, but they're hamstrung by a law that makes any mind-altering substance illegal by default. A lot of science has gone into Sentia, but they're in the paradoxical position that publishing that science would mean that they're unable to sell the product.

https://www.mdpi.com/2072-6643/14/18/3761

>>456145
PSA exempts substances ordinarily consumed as food and drink.

>>456148

I know who he is but I can't buy a product advertised as being scientific by a man posing behind a bar in a lab coat.

>>456149

So how come space cakes aren't legal?

>>456145
Not to sound rude, but you're overthinking it. The reason people assume vaping is harmful is most people aren't looking at the evidence because they don't really care, and for decades we've been, rightly, told that inhaling gasses through a hot stick is the number one way to recede your gums, turn your heart valves to paper and cover your lungs in a crust of oxygen repelling carbon. Now, obviously a ciggerette and a vape-saber are very different, but the act of smoking is so alike vaping that the prejudice is transferred from one thing to the other.

Sentia has existed for all of 15 minutes so of course there's scepticism for similar reasons as the ones listed above. Also according to a review on Amazon it tastes like beetroot juice so that's plenty "wrong" enough for me.

>>456153

Cannabis is covered by the Misuse of Drugs Act, along with all of the drugs you'd be familiar with. The Psychoactive Substances Act came in in 2016, with the intent of permanently ending the cat-and-mouse game of legal highs - chemists would invent new drugs, the government would ban them, chemists would invent other drugs and so on.

The PSA prohibits the sale of any substance "which is capable of producing a psychoactive effect in a person who consumes it" if the seller "knows or suspects, or ought to know or suspect, that the substance is a psychoactive substance" and "knows, or is reckless as to whether, the psychoactive substance is likely to be consumed by the person to whom it is supplied, or by some other person, for its psychoactive effects".

Any substance which "is ordinarily consumed as food" and contains only ingredients permitted for use in food under EU law is exempt from the PSA.

Sentia is sailing very close to the wind, because it's completely counter to the spirit of the PSA. The whole point is that it's mind-altering, but it just barely counts as a food product. It's full of stuff that is technically legal to use in food, but that nobody would want to use in food and certainly not in those quantities. It really isn't clear where they'd stand if they had to argue it in court.

>>456155

People are thicker than I give them credit for then. If they don't understand the difference between smoke (particulate matter, ie dust and ash, carried in a dense cloud by heat and gasses) and vapour (nothing more than evaporated liquid, visible as a cloud through the effect of condensation) then I don't think any evidence could convince them.

I mean, I do know people who are that daft. I had one mate who insisted he's "not a smoker" because he only smokes weed. As though that's any better. Whatever you smoke, it's the SMOKE, the physical ash and dust you are sucking into your lungs, that fucks you.

Vaping is not smoking. There is no smoke, it's vapour. It's a difference a child can understand.

>>456156

I know all that, I was big into the research chemical thing when it was around. The PSA is still a daft bit of legislation for exactly this reason.

It's basically a law that says "Drugs are just blanket illegal except alcohol and cigs. Oh and coffee. And paracetamol and that. Listen you know what we mean by drugs you hippies! They're illegal!" but I mean, why? What's the point?

Sure, harmful drugs should be banned, but who's to say scientists won't find a drug that's totally safe and harmless? What reason is there to ban it? It's like otherlad said, it's simply because it's counter to the protestant moralist tradition our conservative baseline values are based on. No fun allowed, fun is a sin. Sex is dirty, food and drink is gluttony, alcohol is the path to ruin, and so on.

At the start of February I'm going back to work. I've been off for four months. Shitting myself. I don't see myself as a functional and productive human being. I'm a loser. I'm scared I'm going to fuck it uo even more.

>>456164
Four months? You pussy. I was unemployed for over two years once.

Why were you off work, anyway? Just NEET or did you have some medical problem or something?

>>456162
>but I mean, why? What's the point?
The law kept being outmanoeuvred by people inventing new ways to get high and it was embarrassing them that they couldn't keep up. That's all.

It's actually quite embarrassing the buzz I just got from beating my mate at a game he usually wipes the floor with me on.

>>456161
No, mate, they aren't "thick", they just don't care. Most people aren't vaping, so why would they bother looking into whether or not it's harmful? You wouldn't spend your time researching the safest family car if you don't drive or have kids, would you? You seem very heated about this and I don't fully know why. So heated in fact that you didn't even notice how badly I misspelt "cigarette" in my previous post. I assume the frustration is because these kinds of assumptions are one reason the UK has a, broadly speaking, daft drugs policy, but I don't understand you trying to tie it back ideas of personal self-loathing and Protestant cultural cliches.

>>456167

No lad, that's backtracking. We were definitely talking abut people who do care, because they are bothered enough to complain about it.

If someone fundamentally misunderstands the thing they are complaining about, it is rarely a valid complaint, in my book.

I've dug my old Game Boy Advance out to introduce my daughter to Pokemon. The screen feels so small that I kind of can't believe I must have spent hundreds of hours on it.

>>456145
Give us a review of Sentia. I am mulling over whether I should buy it or not.

My mum called me earlier to ask, slightly nervously, whether I'm okay with my brother's wedding later this year being child free. Apparently he was too scared to ask me himself in case I kicked off about my kids not being invited because his future sister-in-law exploded and said she won't go if her son can't be there. Weddings always seem to turn people into arseholes.

>>456303
When my mum got remarried, she sent an invitation to my auntie and uncle, but because she didn't put the names of their kids (even though she expressly confirmed they were welcome), they refused to come. And then my grandad refusing to come if my grandma came, making my mum have to choose her mum or her dad. Fuck weddings fuck families.

>>456307
When one of my old work colleagues got married her best friend ending up falling out with her. It was over something fairly minor, invitations, food or bridesmaids, I can't remember what specifically but her friend just cut her out of her life and didn't talk to her at all until my colleague got diagnosed with cancer almost a decade later.

Anyway, I don't understand why I'd be mad that my kids can't come. Why would I be mad that someone has given me the excuse to spend a day away from my kids? Every time I've been to a wedding with small children in particular they end up getting bored and nobody wants to listen to a toddler whining and screaming, which inevitably happens at some point.

Ordered some sodium nitrite.

Dunno if I'll take it any time soon but I've been depressed and one-off suicidal for the past ~20 years.

Feels weirdly comforting knowing that I could just commit to it at any moment.

You two can fight over custody of my shed at the will reading.

>>456313

Mate, don't even joke. Get help.

>>456313
>Feels weirdly comforting knowing that I could just commit to it at any moment.

You've always had that ability. You're only being incredibly irresponsible to yourself by making it so much easier to pull the metaphorical trigger at any random moment when killing yourself shouldn't be taken lightly.

Think about it this way: You wouldn't keep a Wonga loan tab ready to go at any moment on your browser, would you?

>>456313
>Dunno if I'll take it any time soon

You're seeking attention on an anonymous internet site. This is probably the wrong place if you're genuinely feeling suicical, but I want to encourage you speaking about this and getting some help.

Alright, I told my partner that my brother wants a child free wedding and she completely flipped her lid; apparently it's disgusting to do so when siblings have kids, so she's currently saying that she won't go because she'll have to look after ours. Thinking about it, pretty much all wedding drama that I've ever heard about involves women.

>>456318

Yep, that's women, the empathetic, sensitive, caring gender for you.

What it comes down to here, I suspect, is that they are being denied the opportunity to show off what a happy little family they are in front of everyone. They are being denied the opportunity to participate in that subtle form of social competitiveness women can't seem to let go of. And especially when a woman becomes a mother, her kids become a crucial part of that.

If I was your brother I'd may as well just have a woman free wedding, otherwise he's never going to hear the end of it.

Re: >>456313
You're all right.

Also, posting this outside of /emo/ was irresponsible of me.

My hoover is on its last legs, except I maintain it can't be because it's survived so much already. I paid £35 for it, new, nearly ten years ago. It has always been shit, but now it makes a weird noise and smells of burning plastic. I tried cleaning it, but that hasn't worked. Anyway, my big gripe is that there is another filter which is visibly clogged, and it's part of the main body so I can't take it out. Except! There are screws! So I unscrewed it. Except again! There is one screw which I can see but can't reach, because there is a spinning bit of plastic to help the plug come out, directly in front of it.

I've been saying for years that I'll buy a new one. I could get a big Henry one like normal people have. But if I'm going to bin this one anyway, I might as well have one last go. Surely I can't let one tiny plastic bar get between me and the 10th anniversary of my strained relationship with the Bissell Cleanview™ Compact Model 2396-E. Yes, I kept the box in case I ever needed it, and at last it has come in handy.

My girlfriend got me one of those automated blowjob sextoys as a gift from her holiday, it vibrates and has many functions like a button for it to go into 'take every last drop' mode. It also has a button to make lady orgasm noises where the woman is clearly faking it for added realism.

Well let me tell you that there is nothing that quite puts fear into a man like getting a sextoy from the third world and having a vacuum seal go uncomfortably tight on your member and then once you switch it off to discover that it's actually still sealed on. Definitely up there in terms of things I've put my knob in that could've gone horribly wrong.

>>456322
My only advice is that if you're on the hunt for a new one then the Amazon basics vacuum cleaner is actually really good value. One of the best vacuums I've owned actually.

If you've kept the receipt then put your best normcore outfit and act mystified when trying to return it once they tell you that it's outside the return date - "why, I was only here yesterday!".

Been around 3 different shops, can't find Lyle's Golden Syrup Cake nor Jamacian Ginger Cake anywhere. Is there a supply shortage?

Interesting fact found while searching - the lion depicted in the Lyons logo is deceased and being feasted upon by bees. Pretty cool, huh? Apparently it's a biblical reference.
Also, I could have sworn it was 'Lyon's'.

>>456322
I had a Hettie and it was fantastic. I've got a Shark at the moment and I'm not overly keen on it.

>>456325
>Jamacian Ginger Cake

I also went on a quest for this a little while ago and couldn't find any anywhere. I think they might have stopped making it.

>>456325>>456328
Have you tried the likes of B&M and Home Bargains?

>>456324
Your post was the first one below the line so I surmised you were contributing to a discussion about sex toys and was amused to read you recommend a vacuum cleaner.

>>456322
>>456327

I got a Miele vacuum cleaner ten years ago and it's still good as new. They're not inexpensive, I'm not going to lie, I think mine cost £250 and it was already reduced. But it's built like a tank. The Germans know their stuff when it comes to appliances. I've still got my old Bosch fridge freezer in the basement from when I was living in a flat, it's almost 20 years old and I still use it for beer and other stuff. It hasn't broken down once.

>>456332

Correction, the fridge needed a £20 thermostat sensor a few years after I bought it, it was after the warranty period but it was easy to get via the Internet and it then took me ten minutes to install. But yeah, hasn't given me any trouble since.

>>456332
German for lecky, British for gas.

Which of our cities has the best quality of life/rent ratio?

>>456335
I've heard people say Bristol.

>>456335
I'd say Sheffield or Chester.

Source: pulled out of my arse.

>>456334

To be fair, Numatic (Henry etc) hoovers are genuinely excellent. Big, crude, but incredibly tough and totally serviceable. I've got one in the workshop and it just refuses to die, despite being constantly brutalised with horrendous industrial filth.

>>456335

Liverpool. Cheap rent, epic lash, top-tier slags. Oh, and there are some museums and theatres or whatever.

>>456337
>Chester
>pulled out my arse

You don't say...

>>456339
It's not really that dissimilar from York, just with more scousers visiting.

>>456335
I think Manchester is a good shout if you want somewhere a bit smaller, more affordable with good nearby transport links. It's an example of what you can do when the local authorities are relatively well run, the centre even has a Tim Hortons.

Although I'll proviso that ultimately you take London first and then you scale down based on what you can afford. If you're single and middle class then London really does have a lot.

>>456337
I've lived in both of these and I can't say I'd agree. Chester is a student town that feels a bit like the East Midlands and Sheffield has gone sharply downhill with the arrival of hard drugs and the death of the creative scene it used to have in the 00s.

When the rot gets too much and the UK balkanises into pre-Anglo-Saxon sized successor states Chester will likely be the capital of mine, so I've some loyalty to it. However, it's very boring and I don't think it even has a cinema, so calling it a city is very generous. Even the cathedral is a bit naff.

>>456340
Thanks for the tip, you've saved me a journey to York.

>>456342
[The Kingdom of Elmet will remember this.]

York is far better than Chester. It's got that tower where they burned all the jews alive and the minster is one of the finest in the country.

Manchester is an irredeemable shithole. It's got the scale and traffic and pollution of a proper big city like London, but none of the good things. I can only recommend Manchester if you're a gay lad in your early 20s, otherwise it has little to offer but unpleasantness.

Sheffield is actually dead nice. I visited there for the first time in a few years the other week, and while I used to judge it pretty harshly, I do have a fondness for the place. It's cosy, not too big and not too small, like Leeds but with nice geography. Leeds is really nice but it's let down by a catastrophic lack of public transport.

Wakey uber alles otherwise tho.

>>456345
I think what differentiates Manchester from other large cities is that it's the type of place that's fine to live, but not somewhere you'd want to visit if you don't. There's enough places to go and things to do if you want to spend a day out in Leeds, but you can't really say the same for Manchester.

>>456335
Allegedly, it's Aberdeen, but that's in Scotland so I don't know how nice it can really be.

I went and did the thing the internet tells you to never do - I bought 6 months of Hinge Premium to make use of the paid features.

It's early days but has been broadly alright so far, specifically because I did it for a reason (filters on short women and people who don't want kids). The huge plus in what is likely a honeymoon period is that the app is clearly rewarding paid users by showing them the better profiles. Although I will add the drawback that newer features like relationship type can't be filtered despite it being the most obvious one and I'd really prefer a third-party app that just automatically removes any profiles that contains certain key words. I'm also worried of the time sink this will create when combined with the unlimited likes option. I'll keep you posted on my descent into madness.

But I will note to any otherlads that I get matches already and live in a large city. Don't bother with it otherwise. I'm a tall bloke who is tired of dealing with women a foot shorter than me and there's an experiment to be had in seeing what filtering apolitical women does.

YouTube won't stop suggesting I watch Micky Flanagan videos and I've absolutely no idea why.

>>456449

https://www.youtube.com/feed/history

>>456450
A bunch of music videos, some things related to Rate My Takeaway, ProZD, Jay Foreman, a couple of Bill Bailey skits, a few by Sean Locke, Tom Scott, Auto Shenanigans and a few randoms.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-2z-AdzgKjY

Okay there's a few comedians in there but nothing to justify 90% of the suggested videos being Micky Flanagan.

>>456450
I recently started using this place again and as soon as I did I started getting Mitchell and Webb suggestions - specifically the one about A-level French. Keep in mind that unlike otherlad I absolutely refuse to have anything but music in my history (or likes) so it must be coming from the links you lot are posting.

>>456453
Funnily enough, I have also had that one recently recommended to me. I do like Mitchell & Webb's farming and football sketches but I haven't watched them in years.

Maybe we're more alike than you think, espeically if you posted the other RHCP song in the /beat/ thread.

https://archive.vn/e1Sfg

>But the descent of Britain is in many ways more dramatic. By the end of next year, the average British family will be less well off than the average Slovenian one, according to a recent analysis by John Burn-Murdoch at The Financial Times; by the end of this decade, the average British family will have a lower standard of living than the average Polish one.

>>456455
We know. It's been brought up several times since the FT article was written, for example >>455162.

I did that thing again where I buy a train ticket to a random place near Manchester, and go and check it out.

It is much more difficult than I was expecting to get a good curry in Bradford. Nevertheless, Bradford is a nice place and I recommend it.

>>456457
If you're doing that, I recommend a day out in Edale.

>>456457
What was nice about it? I grew up there, I understand in its current state it's full of shut down businesses and therefore a bit of a ghost town. Nice architecture, but I wouldn't want to spend a day wandering about in the city centre.

>>456461
>Nice architecture

Thats what's a shame about places like Bradford and, to a lesser extent, Dewsbury. A lot of the old architecture is quite nice but they're so run down. I had to run a few errands around Dewsbury yesterday and the people are just... abnormal. It's not even a race thing because it's the absolute dregs of society regardless of the colour of their skin, although I do appreciate that one of the main reasons Dewsbury is such a shithole is thanks to white flight and anyone who could afford to leave getting the fuck out of there.

Anyway, if otherlad wants a decent decentish day out near Bradders then I'd suggest Saltaire.

>>456462
Go on a day the tramway is running.

>>456461
It was different from Manchester, it has lots of open spaces, it's not so nice that it's boring but it's not so grim that it's depressing, and there are lots of signs everywhere to tell tourists where they are. Yes, a lot of it seems to be shut and out of business, but plenty of places are still open so I had lots of shopping centres to look round.

Oddly, while the architecture is indeed nice, I wasn't as impressed by it because I looked out of the window on the train and architecture gets nice almost as soon as you leave Manchester. I was impressed by that brown stone everything's made of, but I was used to it by the time my train got to Hebden Bridge and it took the edge off seeing it in Bradford.

>>456467
I would also like to add that while I was admittedly walking around randomly, I did get sick of waiting to cross the same huge road for the tenth or fifteenth time. It was the big crossing opposite the Alhambra. Wherever I explored, I wound up there again ten minutes later.

>>456461

>>456462
Saltaire is weird. Lived there about 25 years ago. Can't remember much about it then, but nowadays it's pretty upmarket despite being surrounded by Shipley which is a bona fide shithole.

>>456473
It's UNESCO listed now and the majority of homes are let by the trust or private landlords. Gives that eerily uncanny theme park feeling as you're walking about the place.

Most of my valuable books have come from the Children's Society on the Saltaire high street. Rich folks about with more money than sense. The brewery is decent too.

>>456457

There's that whole valley at the west edge of West Yorkshire where all the towns are huge wastes of potential. That whole swathe of towns between Bradford, Huddersfield, Halifax, Birstall, Batley, and Dewsbury etc are all places that under different circumstances, could be absolutely picturesque, but they are instead deprived, dilapidated and depressing.

I always say Leeds is loads nicer than Manchester but really big chunks of it are much the same, it's just rows and rows of either modern-ish suburb or of those oppressive 1930s red brick slum terraces (but which are somehow worth half a million now.) The old fashioned Yorkshire sandstone you find in those smaller towns though is lovely, and the geography of the hills and valleys around there is very scenic.

Anyway I'm moving to live in one of them soon, so I'm going to just going to bet on it getting gentrified around me once I live there.

>>456475
>Gives that eerily uncanny theme park feeling as you're walking about the place.

If you've ever been to Wentworth that gives off a similar vibe, albeit on a much smaller scale. There's things like all of the houses have to have the same green wooden door.

>>456476
>Anyway I'm moving to live in one of them soon, so I'm going to just going to bet on it getting gentrified around me once I live there.

ONE OF US! ONE OF US!

>>456479
Pick Leomionster. Much more livable.

>>456480
That's not in or around Cleckhuddersfax,
though.

>>456481
Well noticed.But there's good walking there, no one blinks twice if you keep chickens and if you like plinking no one's too fussed if you get a little flier.

>>456476
Is Birstall actually a settlement? I thought it was just a retail park with an Ikea and a Showcase Cinemas.

>>456484
They've got a Tim Horton's now so it's basically got its own Canadian embassy.

>>456484

Yeah, it's about the same size as somewhere like Horbury and has its own little miniature "town centre" along Leeds Road. The retail park does take up a lot of the room but it's on the outer edge.

I'd imagine it's a pretty convenient place to live, if you look on the map it's smack bang in the middle of Leeds, Bradford, Huddersfield and Wakey. Plenty of options for work when you have all of West Yorkshire in easy commuting range and the M62 on your doorstep.

>>456486
>it's smack bang in the middle of Leeds, Bradford, Huddersfield and Wakey.
Is that supposed to be good?

>>456487

It is good. Can't think of nowhere else I'd rather live on God's green earth.

D'you know, some places, the bus stops are blue. Blue! I tell thee.

>>456488

Apparently, in some foul uncivilised corners of this earth, they don't have Rugby League. It boggles the mind.

>>456486
It'd be gridlock central. I used to live in Mirfield and commute to Leeds; there was no route that wasn't almost constantly going at a snail's pace. Birstall always has clogged roads.

>>456490

Everywhere does nowadays though. There's just too many people and our infrastructure hasn't had much serious work since the 60s, and that includes any serious public transport investment.

Covid was heaven for commuters, but we've sunk right back into traffic jam purgatory since.

>>456488
Dunno about the colour of the stops but First Bus and Arriva leave me blue-balled. It has to be one of the worst services in the country.

Just move to Newcastle. We have a functional metro system and cheaper houses.

>>456495
And The Boat. In spirit at least.

>>456448
Yeah it turns out it's bollocks. You don't notice it when you're being drip-fed but most dating profiles are inactive - one benefits of lockdowns being that you have proof how big a percentage of the population that is, that and they added new features that obviously don't show on some because they don't log in. I guess it's an inevitability that over time dating apps fill out with dead profiles.

As a plus they refund you right away even if you're over the 48 hour cut-off. If you ever want to spend a weekend sending messages than there you go.

Chocolate almonds are the shit.

Ecstasy is pretty shit, I don't get the hype honestly. I've known some people really bang on about it, but I've tried it a few times now and it's usually about 20 minutes of a really unpleasant and dizzy but at least kind of trippy high, and then just several hours of being far too warm.

I used to think coke was overrated but I've at least since discovered its strength as a compliment to alcohol, whereas I can't really see the appeal of this shit at all. It's "Mum can we have some acid?" "No we've got acid at home!" and the acid at home is some dodgy pills in the shape of an Anonymous mask.

>>456580
What do either of those things have to do with acid?

>>456580

I once drove a friend home after a night of partying at a club, and he was pretty high on ecstasy, possibly some THC knocking about in his system as well. Anyway, he was being a completely insufferable cunt in the back of my car, to the point that he was becoming a safety risk. At some point he actually tried to completely remove my headreast from my seat backrest, for no apparent reason at all. That's when I hit the brakes and pulled over in the middle of the countryside between two villages and told him to straighten the fuck out or I was going to leave him there so he would have had to walk the last four or five miles. For the rest of the drive, he was quieter and moving around less, but then started talking incessantly about completely bizarre things.

My girlfriend has friends round and they're smoking weed downstairs and my toilet is downstairs and I need to go through the room they're in to access the toilet but I don't like people so I've been holding a piss in for 2 hours now.

>>456583

>>456583
Is there perhaps an arse you can piss in?
It's the .gs way.

I've just had the worst cheese scone of my life.

My toilet did a whoopsie, and something inside it broke. It only costs £20 to buy pretty much all the insides of a cistern, so I did that and thought I'd just replace whatever it was that's broken. So far, the experience has largely been incredibly easy; the hardest parts have, in order, been:
1 (hardest). Reaching a nut that is almost impossible to reach due to the amateurish layout of my bathroom
2. Coming to terms with the fact that I bought the wrong type of fitting and could be finished by now if I knew what I was doing (I bought a Fluidmaster but I could have just swapped out the existing Torbeck if I'd known)
3. Finishing up after a full 15-20 minutes of hard work, declaring myself a plumbing prodigy and genius, then turning the water back on and getting violently sprayed because I've actually done it all wrong

Why can two-thirds of this entire site not just piss normally this weekend?

>>456592

>Why can two-thirds of this entire site not just piss normally this weekend?

Because you wouldn't listen when I told you to piss in the sink, would you. You've brought this upon yourselves.

>>456593
Jokes on me, something's buggered with the plumbing in my flat and now the toilet flushes just fine but more than a pint or so down the bathroom sink and it comes bubbling back up in the shower.

Plumber's hopefully showing up next week, until then it's toilet pissing and sponge baths.

I forgot I'd agreed to go to some shite power metal gig with the missus this weekend, and now she's reminded me about it, I really can't be arsed with it.

Normally if I don't particularly like a band I'm still alright with hanging about and getting pissed, jumping in the pit occasionally, and wandering in and out for a smoke as I please. But I failed to realise it's not just at a small pub or club venue like the underground kvlt black metal type gigs I'd normally go to; so it'll be a fortune for shite beer, there will be too many people to get away with snorting in the toilets, and I'll just have to stand there and actually watch. It's going to be bollocks.

Fuck sake.

I'm trying to work out how much my energy costs and whether it's cheaper to use my fan.

So the current price cap for electricity is 34p/kWh. If I use my 2000W electric fan heater for one hour, that costs 68p.

The price cap for gas is 10p/kWh. I googled by boiler (Vaillant ecoTEC Pro 28) and found something that says it "has a CH output of 25.9 kW". So let's say 26kW. So if I put the heating on for an hour, that's £2.60, right? Which means the central heating is massively more expensive than the fan to have on.

Of course there are other factors like if the central heating switches off the radiators will stay hot for a while, unlike the air in the room, but that's basically it right?

I've seen other figures online given by an employee of Worcester Bosch saying radiators only cost 10p to run per hour, but that seems to have been calculated as an average over the year which takes into account the days you have it switched off in the summer, so it sounds like boiler industry bullshit.

>>456669
Get one of these. It's like constantly being in a warm hug.

https://tuclothing.sainsburys.co.uk/p/Charcoal-Grey-Borg-Hoodie-/140738728

>>456669

>Which means the central heating is massively more expensive than the fan to have on.

If the heating is running continuously. The thermostat will turn the boiler off once it has reached the set temperature and turn it back on when the temperature dips back down.

Boilers have a lot of heat output, because they're designed to be able to heat your whole house relatively quickly and provide hot water on demand. As you've worked out, the cost per unit of heat is about three times lower for gas than for electricity. The advantage of electricity is that you can target the heat more effectively, but you can do something similar with gas by turning down radiators in rooms you don't need and turning down the main thermostat.

Why, in the current outcry about heating prices, has everyone forgotten that "life hack" about putting an upside-down flowerpot over a tealight? It was meant to be an absolute game-changer, and I had friends who swore by it. I think it turned out it was poisonous somehow, and tealights don't last that long so it wouldn't be that cheap, but it's testament to the fleeting nature of online culture that I had forgotten about it until right now and so had you.

>>456673

I think about it every time I go into the garden and see my flower pots.

Can men who get hair transplants grow it out long afterwards? I don't think I've ever seen that.

>>456673
Get a high tog blanket an a proper hot water bottle. You can get them in the classic shape and up to a 3" long, one time investment and then use your kettle. If you've never had one, it's exquistely comfortable, even if you share it.

>>456679
Hair transplats are just that. Dig a small plug out of your scalp that captures the hair follicle and dig a plug where it can live again. If you had thin hair where it was dug from, you'll have thin hair where it's implanted. It's oddly like gardening.

If you have strong back (of head) hair, there may be room to re-pot it, but expect, at most, a decent "back and sides" cut.

>>456681

A sickly plant can thrive if it's replanted somewhere with better conditions, I don't see the connection here.

>>456682
HAIR GOT ROOTS.
PLANT GOT ROOTS.
RUB MANURE IN YOUR SCALP.

>>456683
Didn't work.

New manager just discovered computer generated overlays on Google Meet. Might kill myself. Did the last three years not happen to these people?

>>456682
Replant an airy soil loving plant into clay. It'll live, but not thrive.

Deeply upsetting moment earlier today when someone I was watching play computer games that I'd assumed to be several years my junior was, in fact, my age and with a family of his own. It was as if fate itself was telling me that not only am I a manchild, I am an especially loathsome, tragic, manchild.

>>456691

I have the opposite issue, I have absolutely no qualms about my "manchild" status, because I believe maintaining a connection with your inner youth is fundamentally healthy, and because in many ways remaining childless and living out a kind of eternal 20s is the only sane reaction to today's economic headwinds.

But when a YouTuber or streamer or someone is making a "retrospective" of a game or whatever, let's say Half Life 2 or Oblivion, and they mention that they were under the age of ten when they first played it, I instantly have to close the video. How am I supposed to take anything they have to say seriously? I even feel a bit dirty for the fact that for a few moments, in my mind judging them as a peer, when they are a child.

>>456692
As far as I'm concerned nobody was born after 2001.

>>456693
It finally happened for me a couple of days ago. I was recommended a post on Facebook that was posted by a group called "2000s kids only". It is time to give up and just wait for death.

Is it illegal to sms bomb a scammer, or what would the repercussions be?

I got a text message tonight from a number with the country code +48 for Poland, and it read something like "Hello Grandma, I've got a new phone, please whatsapp me under this number. Your grandson.", followed by what appears to be a UK Vodafone mobile number.

I know there are tools with which you can sms bomb someone and send them some 250 text messages in short succession, which would essentially render this scammer's phone unuseable, but maybe I should just leave it alone. Don't want the Polish phone scam mafia showing up on my doorstep.

>>456695
They'll probably just switch out the SIM for another one from their large pile.

>>456695
You don't know the messages are originating from a phone or that number.

I went in about eight charity shops today and all but one of them had at least one copy of The President Is Missing by James Patterson and Bill Clinton. I'd never even heard of this book before but it kept following me around today.

https://maphub.net/Darren_Boyle/map-2

This is macabre as fuck.

This weekend I have mostly been crying at home on my own.

>>456701
Are you Capellan? I'll drop once more. Let's have a pint? We'll die tomorrow.

>>456702
Have you been playing loads of Mechwarrior too?

I took a few friends to Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese, the first time I'd been there was a .gs meetup in 2011 or 2012 or something. I'm now a decade+ older and I've done nothing with my life.

I took a few friends to Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese, the first time I'd been there was a .gs meetup in 2011 or 2012 or something. I'm now a decade+ older and I've done nothing with my life.

I only knew what I really wanted when I could no longer have it (a two slot, RX 6700 XT for £400).

>>456708

https://www.ebuyer.com/1143985-powercolor-radeon-rx-6700-xt-12gb-fighter-graphics-card-axrx-6700xt-12gbd6-3dh

>>456709
Mate, do you think I'm not aware of this? Do you think I can't see this item on PC Part Picker also? I just don't want to spend hundreds of pounds on a card that looks like it has a cooler on it from eight years ago and probably has to run it's fans so fast they're audible across the street.

What's decent to listen to on the radio at this time? Usually I'd have Paul O'Grady on in the background while I'm prepping years but Radio 2 replaced him with Rob Beckett and I'm not overly keen on his show.

>>456710

Fucking hell mate, who pissed on your cornflakes?

A two-slot card is going to be louder and hotter than a thicker card, that's just physics. The Powercolor Fighter is no worse than any of the other options of a similar form factor. Buy a bigger case or deal with it.

>>456712
Just pretend I said "Thanks, but, mate..." instead and get over it.

>>456715
Why would he do that when you’re the one being a bellend who’s reacting badly to being called out for being snippy? He’s got nothing to get over, you clearly have. Imagine you did say ,thanks mate but’, then you wouldn’t have sounded like you were feasting on pissflakes.

>>456720
Maaaaaate...

>>456721
Back to Quiggins with you.

>>456720
Alright, it's been days, but if you want to get into I'm happy to. So firstly, let's get rid of this idea that because I dimissed what he said to me I'm "feasting on pissflakes", I just don't care. Secondly, I think he had something to get over because he was clearly taken aback by how I dimissed him. Finally and thirdly, the reason I dimissed what he said was because I never asked "are there any other options?", and I've experienced far too many people simply saying the first thing that comes to them to care about it anymore. You didn't consider what you were saying to me, so why should I act like you're doing me a favour? Because if we all did that the totality of our social fabric would break apart like wet tissue paper? Once again we're back to "I don't care".

>>456723

>I don't care

Sounds like it m8.

>>456723
Perhaps consult your doctor about changing your medication.

>>456724
Other than my words there's not a lot I can do to express myself over the internet, is there? Not to get personal, but I believe everything you've said so it's a little rude that you won't extend that same courtesy to me.

Would you rather own a Honda Civic or a Toyota C-HR?

>>456742
Out of the two of them, the Civic. If only so I don't contribute to every new model of car being a hatchback but also a 4x4.

Still, they pale in comparison to the most beautiful* of all Japanese automobiles.

>>456743

Good god. Still, at least it isn't Malaysian.

I'm not enjoying this tomato shortage one bit, I know I can pad out my pesto pasta with pepper, spring onion and sweetcorn but it's not the same. It feels like this is what normal is for us now, periodic shortages of this or that every season.

What's a refreshing meal for a working lunch using only foods that are abundant in this country? First person to say eggs gets a beating.

>>456742
Civic because it has proper rear doors. Just look at what's going on with the Toyota and ask yourself how long you'll have until something breaks or gets scratched with the handle where it is.

>>456745

Turnip soup.

>>456745
>First person to say eggs gets a beating.
You could boil or fry them instead?

>>456742
I've always wanted a Honda Civic. Not enough to actually buy any sort of car at all, but if I was going to, a Honda Civic from a few years ago would be the one. It's a bit sporty and a bit nice, but it's so totally generic that you can replace bits very easily and own one without looking like an eight-year-old who won the lottery. It really is my dream car out of all cars currently being made (although a 1980s Audi Quattro still feels like it would be cooler). I know the most recent Honda Civic does look like something in a child's calendar, but my brand loyalty to an object I have never owned still remains.

>>456745
Four packs of Napolina passata in Farmfoods for a quid. I'm sure it was also three for £1.20 on Bella Napoli chopped tomatoes, too.

>>456742

If I have any sort of loyalty to any sort of large manufacturing conglomerate it's definitely Toyota, but I would still take the civic any day of the week. SUVs for the sake of being SUVs are abhorrent, and I guarantee the usable practical space in the Civic will be close to equal the C-HR.

A daydream I find myself frequently having is wondering what it would be like if I could start my life over again, but still knowing everything I know now. I think it opens up enough questions for me to write a science fiction story about it. However, I realise it's not an original thought so do stories like this already exist?

>>456761
It's a fairly common fantasy but I can't think of any examples of it in fiction.

I will happily agree that soyjaks are the least funny piece of Internet culture ever devised. And the large number of them does not serve to make them any funnier. But I really, desperately, would like to know: do any of you recognise what this one is based on? Is it a specific person, or some kind of stereotype? It makes me very uncomfortable for a reason you can possibly guess.

>>456766

It's based on you. I drew it after following you at random then posting it somewhere innocent seeming that I knew you'd happen upon at the exact right time, probably an obscure chan that nobody really has any way of knowing you browse and at what time you would be looking. Obviously this would take a huge amount of time, thought and effort but it's worth it as part of my plan to tip you off that I'm stalking you via memes for no particular reason.

>>456766
It's you, m7.

And soyjaks are ace for winding up the clinically sensitive with strawmen in the form of poorly drawn cartoons. Climb aboard the banter bus.

>>456766
Looks kind of like the Angry Video Game Nerd.

>>456766

I understand your concern, but a balding man with glasses is hardly a rare occurrence.

Or it's you, who knows.

>>456768
Retard.

>>456779
Not as retarded as getting triggered by internet cartoons by any stretch of the imagination.

>>456784
>Triggered
What?

I think the music of The Bloodhound Gang has aged rather well, considering.

>>456797
It's music with humour aimed at teenage boys. There's always going to be a market for that.

>>456798

They won't know who Chasey Laine is, though.

>>456798

I'd actually say it's a fairly universal humour, and that's why it has aged well. Not all of their songs were about sex (although yes, a lot of them) but even the ones that are have a lot of very clever wordplay and innuendo.

Then again I do tend to think anyone who doesn't like sexual humour is a stuck up arsehole, so perhaps I would be inclined to view it more favourably. I mean let's be honest, you know the kind of person who tuts and makes a face at a dirty joke, and they're never not a cunt, are they?

The Guardian is cursed.

https://www.theguardian.com/education/2023/feb/26/the-return-to-medieval-drugs-to-treat-ailments

>>456800
To some extent, men don't really grow up. I know that my dad will watch Shaun the Sheep if he finds out it's on even when he isn't looking after his grandkids.

Are we facing an eggs shortage? Managed to get red peppers, even if I had to pay Co-op prices, but no eggs in sight.

>>456803
I have found myself just watching Bluey. My daughter has fucked off to do something in her room or has gone to pester her mum and I'm just sat there enjoying the show.

>>456804

Bird flu.

>>456803

You can say that, although I think it's an interesting observation that we don't say the same about women when they essentially spend their entire lives playing dress up and doll house. I think it's more accurate to say that the expected behaviours of a mature, adult male are more rigidly defined (and to some extent, enforced), so we notice it more when blokes do something "childish".

Women get a free pass to be childish all the time because on a subconscious, benevolently fisherist way, we never actually expect them to have grown up in the first place; but it also means they have a lower bar to clear. We perceive them as much more "mature" just by holding down a normal job and looking after themselves in exactly the same way a bloke would, but for a bloke that's just the expected baseline.

I don't think anyone ever really grows up. We just spend the 9-5 pretending we have done, and then indulging our inner child on the evenings and weekends. When people have kids the part they find most liberating is suddenly being "allowed" to do that without shame.

>>456807
Lonstanding issues.

>>456804
>>456806

Around the last time of shortage there was a comment floating about social media from a guy claiming to be a farmer saying supermarkets simply weren't buying his eggs at decent price, rather than there being a genuine shortage. The clip was shot infront of multiple pallets of eggs - at a guess enough to sustain a small town over say 5 days or so.

Now I've definitely seen plenty of aditional zombie looking birds since the 'rona outbreak but I'm wondering if the supermarkets are restricting egg trades to stablise price (somehow - I'm not an economist). I'm guessing by refusing to 'overpay' for a persihable good, the price doesn't rise sharply.. but that would require a shortage for bids to increase .. Huh, it's quite interesting to think about.

>>456805
Hey Dougie is a good one :)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K05N2jqFHc8