My husband helps me pick out boyfriends online — he knows my type
An OnlyFans model has proclaimed herself the “luckiest wife in the world” after letting her hubby vet her potential matches on dating apps.
Content creator Alexandra Le Tissier, who goes by Alex, wanted to spice up her “boring” love life with her long-term partner, Mitch, after their spark lulled — so she turned to other men. Despite Le Tissier’s deep love for Mitch, she asked if she could creating dating app profiles for new connections, and he surprisingly agreed.
Despite Mitch’s willing participation, not everyone is on board with their nontraditional matchmaking. On X, formally known as Twitter, strangers who have spotted Le Tissier on Bumble will reach out to her husband to inform him of her supposed infidelity. “It’s just really funny that people think that I would just do it without letting him know — and then post it on my Twitter,” she said, calling those strangers “shady.”
This is the face of a man who let his wife announce to the media that he's a cuckold. You'd have thought the son of a famous footballer could do better than this.
The psychology behind cuckoldry is pretty fascinating. (That is, cuckolding in specific terms, where it is only the woman who exercises sexual freedom, while the man does not, and his tolerance of that one-sided situation being the central core of the fetish.)
Best as I can tell, it's essentially a form of agency reclamation. If you tell yourself you're turned on by this act, then suddenly you're no longer a victim, you're no longer a pathetic loser who has no choice but to watch other men rail his woman. Instead if you tell yourself you enjoy it, you're the boss. You're the winner. You're getting exactly what you want in life.
Confronting cuckolds with this theory has only ever resulted in the kind of complete explosive rage that tells me I've hit the nail directly on the head.
It is an exceptionally rare man who actually wants to get cucked, it is fundamentally the opposite of our biological impulses. You can enjoy things you don't like, and get off on negative emotions rather than positive, in the form of more generalised masochist fetishes, but I don't buy for a second that that's what's actually going on with 90% of cuckolds.
>>460072 I'm sure I read an account by a cuckold whom got mad that his wife was actually enjoying sex with other men. If I remember correctly, he saw her as the prize he got to keep when the other men had got home; showing her off, essentially. He hadn't stopped to factor in that she might get pleasure from being fucked, he was solely objectifiying her as a fucktoy to be used.
>“It’s just really funny that people think that I would just do it without letting him know — and then post it on my Twitter,” she said, calling those strangers “shady.”
I don't know why non-monogamists continually bring up this complaint like it's on par with gaybashing. Her twitter is odd but then why the fuck isn't it put in bold letters on her profile "HI I'M HER HUSBAND AND I'M HERE TO VET WASHING MACHINE REPAIRMEN" which is something you'd want to know if you're innocently swiping.
And then she says that they need to talk to her for weeks on end before getting the stamp of approval from her husband. No wonder she hasn't met anyone yet.
>>460075 I used to think this but every iteration of that face I've met has been a married man. And religious ones who married young no less. I realise I sound a bit mental but you know how certain people seemingly repeat in the population.
Plus you don't hear about closeted gay men hooking their wife up to get off. They go out and do the business themselves. Gays are proactive and hands-on people, I won't have them besmirched by all this.
I don't know why people get so triggered by cucks. I have to say I'm not one, but if someone genuinely enjoys XYZ, our own reaction to XYZ is irrelevant. You see the same thing for non-monogamy in general (of which I do participate in). People become strangely aggressive in their condemnation of it, as if it has any bearing on their life whatsoever.
>>460112 I've completely pulled it out of my arse, but I'm not really sure how much of a willing cuck he is. It seems like she's strong-armed him into this position and he's too spineless to resist it. His family have disowned him because of her OnlyFans account, which apparently she started because he wasn't able to hold down a job, so maybe it's a sunk-cost thing where he can't see any other way out. I'll have to see what the chubby chasers think, but she doesn't seem to be anything special; just a run-of-the-mill plump lass with big tits and a bit of surgery to look like a bimbo.
It's also one thing being a cuck and another thing going to the media to let everyone know you're a cuck. If I was a cynic I'd say she purposefully got with him because he's the son of Matt Le Tissier and she wants her shot at fame.
Ethical non-monogamy isn't for me. For one thing, it seems like you have to spend an awful lot of time talking about boundaries and how everyone is feeling.
>but if someone genuinely enjoys XYZ
>genuinely enjoys
>genuinely
That's the crux of it. I think it's more often than not the case that the cuck is either acting out some kind of trauma response to being cheated on/abandoned, or the woman heavily pressured them into it on the threat of leaving to do it anyway. I think there are signifgicantly fewer "genuine" cuckold enjoyers than there are people who are doing something psychologically unhealthy under the guise of a kink.
In the world of BDSM and fetish people, where there's people getting their rocks off on all kinds of weird and wonderful stuff far more bizarre and psychologically puzzling than merely letting your woman shag other men, it's still held as a pretty strong ethical standard that you should be sure the person you indulge fetishes with isn't doing it out of any unhealthy motivations. It's very easy for abuse to slip under the radar that way.
So that's the thing really. Cuckolding, typically, isn't a BDSM fetish people thing- It's a normie kink. Normies don't have the ethical qualms of BDSM community autists.
I've really got nothing to add here, but I do have one question: Is this actually Matt Le Tissier's son? If so it's just another one of those post-2016 head-fucks I'll have to deal with somehow.
>Content creator Alexandra Le Tissier, who goes by Alex, wanted to spice up her “boring” love life with her long-term partner, Mitch,
All this time I thought she was Matt Le Tissier's daughter. But I guess if they're married, she's got his last name. To be fair, he does look more like Matt Le Tissier than she does.
>>460113 >His family have disowned him because of her OnlyFans account
Matt Le Tissier has gone mental recently anyway; he is now one of those brave question-askers who only ever ask brave questions about why 5G causes coronavirus or whatever.
I'm half in agreement with you, here. I think there is obviously an arousing element to seeing someone you're attracted to (in this case your partner) doing anything sexual, like having sex (no shit). A previous generation might have called it voyeurism.
I am entirely with you that it's the most transparently self-destructive "fetish" I've seen discussed, though. By definition, it undermines the basis of a healthy relationship. I could see some people making it work with absolute trust and care for eachother's wellbeing, but how vanishingly rare and hard-won is that kind of relationship? And who in their right might would encourage or accept their partner taking the risk of crushing their self-esteem just for more potent sexual arousal?
I suspect that the rise of interest in it is very closely related to massively increased exposure to pornography, social isolation, more precarious relationships generally, and misguided pseudo-evolutionary theory. I'd put the most emphasis on the first, too. I'm not saying porn or erotica is inherently evil, but it's also naive to think it has no impact on your sexuality to have access to such a bredth of sexual media anywhere on common devices.
Even worse, it's an industry driven by advertising revenue, with all of the faddishness and emotionally-driven clickbaiting that brings. It's a bit like the way "incest" videos flooded the market very recently; you can change the title of a video to include "stepmom" or whatever, then all of a sudden you've added an imaginary layer of taboo to exactly the same old thing. Now it's just a case of adding "cheating" to the title, or casting a sad looking man to watching the scene, before we move onto the next manufactured taboo.
>>460132 >I suspect that the rise of interest in it is very closely related to massively increased exposure to pornography, social isolation, more precarious relationships generally, and misguided pseudo-evolutionary theory.
I think a lot of it is to do with the incredibly warped American mindset. We all know many of them are repressed and have weird views on race, which seems to spill out into their sexual fantasies. I'm not going to profess to being an expert on cuckoldry, but a lot of it online is about the taboo of watching your wife getting ploughed by a black man; I know there's other types, such as sharing your wife with your friends or letting her go out on dates and only finding out after the event, but a lot of it is obsessed with race.
Traditional Tahitian culture included widespread wife sharing, before the christians arrived and convinced them that the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation was the only accepted form of sex.
Did the pre-missionary Tahitians suffer from "massively increased exposure to pornography, social isolation, more precarious relationships generally, and misguided pseudo-evolutionary theory. "?
I would suggest not. They just liked sex and liked sharing it with their friends.
It almost always goes unspoken, but our society (broadly, society based on the abrahamic religions of judiasm, christianity and Shamanism) considers sex to be bad. Of course you would not want to share bad things with your friends.
Equally the pre-missionary Tahitians would have had no understanding of a fetish like cuckolding. If your society is permissive and open about fucking your mate's missive already, there's no taboo broken. You can't have a fetish for something totally normal and commonly accepted, almost by definition.
The question for cuckolding is why, when we have over so many years (for whatever reason) developed a set of cultural expectations and norms that involve monogamy, and which has apparently lasted so stably and securely, is this new form of taboo-breaking gaining popularity? People have always had affairs, people have always been unfaithful; or society's expectation of monogamy has always been a facade once you get down to it. But why this specific expression of it involving the humiliation and shame of the male?
You can come up with a lot of theories, you can make a great deal of interpretations about why it may or may not be healthy, and any number of them might hold water. But just going "Oh well the Peruvian Tinga-Tinga tribe used to put sand down their jap's eye, it's Western society that's weird" is practically meaningless.
"Cuckolding" isn't really a monolithic thing, it's a catch-all term for a lot of different behaviours with a lot of different motivations. Some cucks are turned on by humiliation, with their fetish activity often overlapping with SPH or forced bi scenarios. Some cucks get off on seeing their wife being fucked by other men, with no sense that it's humiliating or emasculating. Some men who let their wives sleep around are cuckolds in the literal sense, but aren't fetishists - they have just come to an accommodation, often because they have less of a sex drive.
A lot of people had weird fetishes pre-internet, but it was much more difficult to find people who also had that fetish. Many aspects of the cuckolding fetish aren't new, they're just more visible. There were swinger's clubs, dogging sites and contact magazines before the internet. Anyone old enough to remember adult cinemas will also remember that it wasn't terribly unusual for a couple to turn up with the express intent of what we would now call cuckoldry - she gets gangbanged, he watches.
It's also worth pointing out that changes to traditional monogamous values in the west started as early as the 1960s. The contraceptive pill was invented, premarital sex became more accepted, divorce rates skyrocketed, women could get bank accounts without permission from their husband or father. Attitudes to sex today are radically different to those in the 1990s, but attitudes then were just as radically different to attitudes in the 1960s. If we fixate on the things that are changing now, we tend to overlook the things that changed in the very recent past but are now taken for granted.
>>460084 >I used to think this but every iteration of that face I've met has been a married man. And religious ones who married young no less.
Men in traditionally homophobic cultures who got married to women at an age when they could get it up for just about anything, before age kicked in and they could only perform for people they're actually attracted to? The spark lulling, so to speak?
>>460145 >which has apparently lasted so stably and securely,
Citation needed. How long has the nuclear family been a thing and how long have other sets of cultural norms lasted?
Men didn't have kind of healthy lifespans you might be imagining and they didn't, generally, marry until their 20s (and late 20s at that). And obviously if you go back to Rome it's all tops and bottoms anyway to varying degrees.
>>460148 How long has a family unit centred on a man and his wife lasted. It's socially useful but you weren't looking at a host of concubines as a medieval serf.
I'm not sure we're this discussion is trying to go but cuckolding has extremely negative connotations to do with humiliation, loss of agency and in it's truest sense outright deception. Wife-swapping isn't the same as cuckoldry and I can't possibly see how watching your wife get ploughed by some local black men (as it appears cuckholds are want to do) will ever not be incredibly fucked up and un-British on multiple levels. That's the obsession the internet has with it, it's a humiliating insult to throw at someone in the same way that it's merged with Americans spanning their one-track minds when it come to men of a dark skin-tone. An insult that began being thrown at centrist Republicans that obviously would have the biggest possible impact.
Is it White who refuses to implement post deletion? Do any of the old colours still exist or has it fallen to Purps and Green to run the show on top of their furniture business.
We're talking about monogamy, not necessarily the nuclear family, which is certainly a much more modern concept and actually very short lived, if you buy the idea that it's starting to break down in the modern world where everyone has to live in a house share with 8 other people and nobody can afford kids.
As for monogamy, in the West it's been around at least as long as Christianity went mainstream, so the better part of a couple of thousand years. Historically speaking it's harder to get a broad picture of what would have been "the norm" before at least the classical era, because cultures were much less uniform, but before then it'd more likely than not you'd have it the other way around where a powerful, high status male would gather as many women as he could, essentially as prisoners, and sow his oats as far and wide as he could; while for the average bloke in the lower ranks of society something resembling our traditional family structure was the norm simply because it was the most economically viable. Which is what it always comes down to, in the end.
The further you go back in history the more biologically deterministic things were, and the strength of a man determined his position in the world and his mating success. In the broad strokes you could say it's all just a sliding scale where the balance of power and value shifts as technology renders biological factors like strength obsolete. The widespread adoption of monogamy was a progressive beneficial change for women, and eventually, even that ceased to be the best thing for women so they did what they do best and nagged men until they got what they wanted. Now they're going to turn the tables fully on us and make society a matriarchal cucktopia.
