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>> No. 29901 Anonymous
5th August 2020
Wednesday 1:43 am
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I can't stop sobbing, I'm not a risk to anything bad, I know it'll get easier, I'm just so unhappy my eyes sting and i'm just looking for someone to tell I can't stop crying.

A girl I love is happier with someone else, she moved on after 2 month back to her ex, I suspect they were talking whilst we were together, I just dont feel good enough, I'm a grown arse man at 27 and I can't deal with it .gs I feel pathetic. I have such AWFUL urges I KNOW i'll never indulge but they're there. I'll be happier one day but for now I'll be miserable.
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>> No. 29902 Anonymous
5th August 2020
Wednesday 1:45 am
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At the risk of sounding callous, can you try to just be happy for her?
>> No. 29903 Anonymous
5th August 2020
Wednesday 1:49 am
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>>29902 No cos he's a cunt who's left marks on her. Who she's keeps going back too, and yeah I know it's pattern, but it doens't make it easier, my heart is just broken. I thought she was 'the one' I thought she was the girl I would marry.
>> No. 29904 Anonymous
5th August 2020
Wednesday 1:52 am
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I dunno then. I guess you have to - eventually - try to see it as a positive for yourself. You can't fix her pattern, the sooner you start the process of getting over her the better.
Still sounds callous but I'm trying to find something in it for you. Like you say, it'll get easier but it's healthy to feel the way you do right now.
>> No. 29905 Anonymous
5th August 2020
Wednesday 1:58 am
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>>29904 mate I know you're right, it'll get easir but it's just so hard. I can't turn off my love. No ones made me feel things like she has. I wish it was different. I run a 5k a night and do weights, after 2 months of 0 contact it still doens't make me happy or give me a buzz or get her from my mind,
>> No. 29906 Anonymous
5th August 2020
Wednesday 2:00 am
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>suspect they were talking whilst we were together

Well they can both fuck off then. She clearly wasn't the one but the girl you assumed would be the one - despite her likely having more red flags than a May Day parade.

I find it helpful to focus, if you must, on the negatives - her flaws and annoying behaviours you've escaped from. I had a similar situation happen to me about your age and good advice I received was to remove any trace of the cancer from your life while now taking the chance to consider a project to keep you occupied.
>> No. 29907 Anonymous
5th August 2020
Wednesday 2:03 am
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Allowing your pain is part of how you grow and move on.

It will get easier.
>> No. 29908 Anonymous
5th August 2020
Wednesday 2:07 am
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Two months isn't a long time when you felt strongly for someone. You'll get there. With any luck in the morning with the hangover you'll feel worse about spilling your guts on here while drunk than you do about her. And that'll pass too.
>> No. 29909 Anonymous
5th August 2020
Wednesday 2:12 am
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>>29908 Is it that obvious I'm drunk?
>> No. 29911 Anonymous
5th August 2020
Wednesday 2:13 am
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Yes, you'll see why tomorrow.
>> No. 29912 Anonymous
5th August 2020
Wednesday 2:19 am
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I realise it is terrible reductionist, but it is apparent from her terrible decision making that you have just said, that she isn't that great.

I'm sure there are elements of personality that you consider to make an ideal match you are caught up in the paradigm of life with her still. But that has passed, it can never be revisited successfully you can only move forward never back.

Focusing on what you had is about as productive as forcing yourself to ignore your hunger pains because you don't feel like starting dinner. You'll spend an enormous amount of energy on something that is actually self defeating putting off the inevitable in a way that makes you feel worse in the end.

Ultimately you don't need her, you don't actually need anyone you can be complete again without anyone else in your life but you have to getting off the couch and going to the kitchen to make that happen.

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