tl;dr got attached to an internet person I'd never met know consciously knowing it was a ridiculous thing to do and now she's off on a date and I'm having a crisis I knew would happen.
Been chatting with this young American bird on the internet, we talk a lot on the phone, shared pictures, I knew it was just a bit of fun for her but I got attached because I've been completely friendless and lived alone for five years and have never really had any interest from any women, internet ones or otherwise, today she has a date in real life and I wished her well and all that but internally I am screaming, I knew full well I shouldn't let this happen but given the context I also knew it was inevitable that I would let myself get attached to some stupid idea out of desperation and now I can't handle it.
>>29974 >consciously knowing it was a ridiculous thing to do
It is difficult to give advice, without sounding callous or harsh to you - and I certainly don't mean it to come across that way, but it probably will.
You both sought and got comfort from a situation that was never, or hardly ever going to resolve in a positive way. She is sharing the fact she "has a date" with you, for a reason - it's the long distance equivalent of a breakup. You were both doing it for "a bit of fun" and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
You're obviously capable of forming relationships, friendships with women - focus on that positive aspect. You've done it once, you'll do it again. With time, this pain will pass.