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>> No. 441558 Anonymous
11th January 2021
Monday 8:46 pm
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New midweek thread: chip butty edition.

Is it even midweek? The days have all blurred into one and lost all sense of meaning.
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>> No. 446911 Anonymous
12th October 2021
Tuesday 5:07 pm
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>>446910
I don't envy you, mate. I'm somehow still on EESA/DLA, dread the day I have to apply for PIP.
>> No. 446912 Anonymous
12th October 2021
Tuesday 6:02 pm
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I'm not a perv right, but this new Heinz soup advert starts with some kids rowing, voiceover goes into "The young cox thought "Warm, creamy, tasty (Heinz Tomato Soup). Yum" then he gets splashed in the face. I'm sorry but that combination has to be someone thinking they're funny, though I don't suppose the voiceover script was made by the same person who storyboarded it. Is this a test? Have I failed?
>> No. 446913 Anonymous
12th October 2021
Tuesday 6:16 pm
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>>446912
>I'm not a perv right

Least convincing statement ever posted on this site.
>> No. 446914 Anonymous
12th October 2021
Tuesday 6:17 pm
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>>446912

Advertising and product marketing can miss the mark, and sometimes with an almost comical lack of awareness.
>> No. 446919 Anonymous
12th October 2021
Tuesday 7:52 pm
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=beToTslH17s

What did Courtney Cox do her face? It's like her cheeks are stuffed with cotton wool balls.
>> No. 446924 Anonymous
14th October 2021
Thursday 5:11 pm
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I was in Aldi last night and one of the female members of staff was like 5 foot tall, but each of her arse cheeks were bigger than my torso. The ideal woman. She was almost as wide as she was tall.
>> No. 446926 Anonymous
14th October 2021
Thursday 6:53 pm
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Just saw a copy of Jimmy Slater's "Appetite" on the bookshelf in a porn video and it completely took me out of it.
>> No. 446927 Anonymous
14th October 2021
Thursday 6:54 pm
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>>446926
What a the new wordfilters coming to? What if I want to start a lively discussion about Jimmy Mansell?
>> No. 446929 Anonymous
14th October 2021
Thursday 10:10 pm
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Do Australians have noticeably different accents? They all sound the same to me, but you'd have thought with the distances between Perth, Adelaide, Melbourne, Sydney, Brisbane, Alice Springs, etc., there's be variations in this.
>> No. 446930 Anonymous
14th October 2021
Thursday 11:13 pm
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>>446929

I'm sure there would be some rural types that have spent way too long in the sun.

Wake in Fright is well worth a watch.
>> No. 446932 Anonymous
15th October 2021
Friday 12:27 am
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I have been up for more than 38 hours straight now. Had some pretty distressing family stuff to deal with. Just getting ready to sleep, i.e. checking messages one final time before putting the phone down and turning off the lights. I have no fucking clue how I managed to stay up this long. It is a lifetime record for me. The last few hours have just felt like one coffee fuelled haze of nothingness that dragged on forever as if time itself was almost standing still.
>> No. 446933 Anonymous
15th October 2021
Friday 1:07 am
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>>446932
Should have done cocaine.
>> No. 446934 Anonymous
15th October 2021
Friday 3:02 am
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>>446932
I currently work at a science user facility, where prior to being employed here I was a frequent user. With the types of experiments people do, and how valuable the awarded time is, back-to-back all-nighters isn't an uncommon thing. I always internally describe it as feeling like my brain is in a bath of warm water.

Hope your family troubles are resolved without too much hassle.
>> No. 446935 Anonymous
15th October 2021
Friday 10:08 am
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https://www.examinerlive.co.uk/whats-on/food-drink-news/pub-landlady-commissions-bizarre-portrait-21845238
>> No. 446936 Anonymous
15th October 2021
Friday 10:09 am
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>>446934
Sounds interesting. Is it like a supercomputer, or some other type of facilities?
>> No. 446937 Anonymous
15th October 2021
Friday 10:15 am
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>>446935
Is it too obvious?
>> No. 446938 Anonymous
15th October 2021
Friday 12:29 pm
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>>446935
Spicy Yorkshire puddings sound shit. Then again, I know someone who recently had mashed potato mixed with onion bhajis at a pub and said it was brilliant.
>> No. 446939 Anonymous
15th October 2021
Friday 12:36 pm
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>>446938
I put a load of dried carolina reaper powder into toad in the hole once and it was awful.
>> No. 446992 Anonymous
16th October 2021
Saturday 3:55 am
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>>446936
A synchrotron, in my case.
>> No. 447002 Anonymous
16th October 2021
Saturday 11:43 am
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>>446938
I've added fried onions to mash before, and it came out excellent, so I can see how that one might work.
>> No. 447003 Anonymous
16th October 2021
Saturday 11:46 am
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>>447002
Isn't that just undercooked hash browns?
>> No. 447007 Anonymous
16th October 2021
Saturday 1:51 pm
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>>447003
Never thought of it that way, and have never tried to make hash browns myself, but that's a good idea. I did once make potato latkes, which are sort of close too.
>> No. 447087 Anonymous
18th October 2021
Monday 9:11 pm
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I got called racist for saying I didn't know which member of BTS was which, as I only saw them for the first time a few days ago. They have different haircuts and clothes in each video so my face blindness comes into play. I also got called racist for saying one was more masculine than the others, as this is white people dolphin rape which feminises East Asian men. But I'm pretty sure they lean into the femininity as pretty boys sell lots of chicken nuggets.
>> No. 447088 Anonymous
18th October 2021
Monday 9:29 pm
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>>447087
That's stupid of whoever called you that.
>> No. 447089 Anonymous
18th October 2021
Monday 9:56 pm
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>>447088
Agreed. How are you supposed to know which member of some random popular beat combo is which?

Which one of these dapper lads is John? No, I don't know either.
>> No. 447091 Anonymous
18th October 2021
Monday 11:28 pm
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>>447087
>I got called racist for saying I didn't know which member of BTS was which
If in doubt, Ant is the one on the left.
>> No. 447092 Anonymous
18th October 2021
Monday 11:41 pm
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>>447091
>Ant is the one on the left
On an unrelated note, I learnt yesterday that my mum thinks Ant & Dec are called Dick & Dom.
>> No. 447116 Anonymous
19th October 2021
Tuesday 10:29 am
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This week I've decided to have a horrible cold or something which feels like someone's grouted by entire head.
>> No. 447144 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 1:11 am
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I'm very depressed, lads. I came home from work early today to focus on myself for a while, but instead I've been mindlessly scrolling the internet all night.

Any tips for getting out of an unproductive and unenjoyable funk?
>> No. 447146 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 1:47 am
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>>447144

Might be a bit predictable for this place, but a new hobby, or rediscovering an old one, will always work for me. That and changing my routine up - wandering about the countryside, or even just a nice bit of your town, will likely clear the mind.
>> No. 447148 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 3:37 am
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>>447144

If you're depressed depressed, then I'd suggest seeing your GP, maybe checking out some self-help resources online.

If you're just feeling a bit listless, I'd suggest making a plan to do something enjoyable today, this week, this month and this year. It might sound a bit daft, but the subconscious mind is much better at imagining negative things in the future than positive things. If you don't have concrete things to look forward to (especially when we're headed into winter), it's easy to drift into an aimless sort of pessimism. Your subconscious pushes you towards the quickest and lowest-effort sources of dopamine, because you're in a kind of evolutionary survival mode.

Potter down to the shops tomorrow for a can of pop and a chocolate bar, make plans to meet a mate, buy some tickets for a gig or an event, book a holiday. It's small stuff, but if you prime your brain to expect positive outcomes you'll feel increasingly more energised to pursue more difficult and uncertain goals.
>> No. 447149 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 3:41 am
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I'm not sure who this Aitch chap is, but he appears to be a paid-up member of the Chub Club. Good lad.


>> No. 447154 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 8:50 am
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>>447144
Shake up your routine a bit. Make a country walk regular, read, cook something different (or go for a meal), etc. Depression on my part is usually severe boredom.
>> No. 447169 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 1:49 pm
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Is there any real benefit to Amazon Prime? I ordered something from them yesterday evening and it's arriving tomorrow so I don't really see the benefit of paying extra to have received it one day sooner.
>> No. 447171 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 2:14 pm
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>>447169
Most of the time it is next day, not all - and you don't pay any delivery charges. If you're buying mostly from Amazon themselves, and not other Marketplace customers, it's a great deal, particularly if you're buying things monthly.

If you're not spending money with them that often, or are using Marketplace companies that aren't using Amazon Fulfilment, then it isn't as great a deal.
>> No. 447172 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 2:19 pm
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>>447144
Take some holiday. I know there's other things you can do, getting out the house right away and making step-by-step plans for after work but I'd be a complete hypocrite if I said that's something you should do when you're knackered from work.

Although I also say this as someone with 30 days holiday that I need to spend before January. Life's a load of bollocks innit.
>> No. 447173 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 2:31 pm
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>>447149
Despise the cunt. On povvo free Spotify his Lucozade advert comes on every 15 minutes. "'Ow are ya meant to get yours with that sort of enerjeh?". Fucking Manc twat.
>> No. 447175 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 5:32 pm
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>>447169

In my opinion they have the best selection of films of any streaming platform, both new and old. Netflix have a decent interface but their library is rubbish nowadays. They focus too much on making their own stuff which is never any good instead of just offering catalouge titles, making it essentially a rental service.
>> No. 447177 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 5:35 pm
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>>447175

I'm disgusted with the lot of you for paying for streaming services instead of just pirating things.
>> No. 447178 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 5:57 pm
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About half an hour ago I ran over a kid's skateboard. Was approaching a T-junction and he was coming from the left, staring at me and slowing down so I assumed he'd stopped; next thing I know I hear a crunch and he's on the floor on the pavement so I think he panicked, lost his balance and fell. There was a charity mugger on the scene who pulled the skateboard out, which was snapped in two, and checking on the boy to make sure he was alright. I could have handled the next part better but I wound my window down to make sure he was okay, said some vaguely soothing platitudes and drove off because his mates and the chuggers were there.

When I got back my girlfriend said his dad had been round and she felt really intimidated by him. He'd left his number so I rang it; according to his son I'd nodded to say he could cross, which isn't true because if I'm going to gesture someone can cross I'll use my hands, accused me of dangerous driving because I could have knocked him down and strongly hinted that I should pay for a new skateboard because it was a present. I didn't say much when that became obvious because I'm not paying a penny, but my girlfriend is convinced he's going to come round again and this will escalate.
>> No. 447179 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 7:01 pm
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>>447178

I apologise for a deeply unhelpful reply, but this just reminded me...



In all seriousness, sounds like an honest accident. How fast were you going at the time? Best get the facts straight in your head and stick to it. Outside of harassing you or actually calling the police, though, I can't imagine there's not much they can do.
>> No. 447180 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 7:18 pm
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>>447179
>How fast were you going at the time? Best get the facts straight in your head and stick to it.

About 5mph as it was coming from a cul-de-sac with lots of cars parked on alternating sides of the road to a junction I had to give way at. His dad was laying it on pretty thick that I should pay for a new skateboard without saying it outright and said some other things that weren't true; I guess if I apparently signalled for his son to cross the road and kept going he thinks I deliberately tried to knock him down.

I don't think anything else will come of it but my girlfriend gets anxious so she's going to keep fretting over it. It doesn't help that I think one of the kid's mates lives next-door, which is probably how they knew where I live.
>> No. 447182 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 8:14 pm
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>>447180

I think you're just going to have to accept that you're going to have to fight the dad. Take some quick Krav Maga lessons, maybe.
>> No. 447184 Anonymous
20th October 2021
Wednesday 9:57 pm
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>>447180
>It doesn't help that I think one of the kid's mates lives next-door, which is probably how they knew where I live.

Sounds like there's another skateboard you ought to runover. To send a message.

But yeah I reckon the kid has made you into a bit of an ogre because he wants a new skateboard. Maybe the dad is going to calm down long enough to smell the bullshit but you can expect some teenage aggro on the horizon like knocking your bins over.
>> No. 447185 Anonymous
21st October 2021
Thursday 12:32 am
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I got water on my PC. I think I might kms if it’s dead. I can’t stop shaking, I fucking hate myself. Before I could turn it off the mouse was lagging. What do I do? PC wise, killing myself is easy.
>> No. 447186 Anonymous
21st October 2021
Thursday 12:56 am
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>>447185
Disconnect it from the power, inspect for water damage, leave 24-48 hours off power to dry out, try again. A small spill is unlikely to kill it.
>> No. 447187 Anonymous
21st October 2021
Thursday 1:09 am
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I just bought Krispy Kreme from the petrol station at 1 in the morning, and I'm sipping a McDonald's coffee with it. There's now even a drive through Cinnabon there too, which we've never had before as far as I know.

I messaged one of my Yank friends to banter about it but they couldn't understand why this was noteworthy at all. If there's one thing that really winds me up about them lot it's their completely oblivious level of cultural ignorance. It's as though they think the rest of the world is exactly the same as their country, but with a few red phone boxes and An Eiffel Tower here and there.

Anyway I'm not annoyed about it, if they bring all their junk food over here and it's available 24 hours a day I'll never need to visit the place ever again.
>> No. 447188 Anonymous
21st October 2021
Thursday 1:27 am
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>>447186
Yeah, done and done. There was liquid in the PCIe slot so I think the GPU is dead/damaged.

I just really don’t like having every negative thing you’ve avoided within yourself being confirmed in a brief moment of carelessness. I would need a dozen lifetimes to become even halfway useful. It doesn’t even make me upset anymore.
>> No. 447189 Anonymous
21st October 2021
Thursday 2:24 am
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>>447188

It'll probably be alright to be honest mate. My old iPhone survived a swim in the toilet, I think a modern computer has enough failsafe stuff built into the design that a minor spill isn't a big deal. Bit like the whole faff about static, we act like computers are made of... I can't remember the idiom, something very fragile, but in reality they're pretty sturdy.
>> No. 447190 Anonymous
21st October 2021
Thursday 3:10 am
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>>447187
>If there's one thing that really winds me up about them lot it's their completely oblivious level of cultural ignorance
I've been living out here almost 6 years and this still winds me up. If I mention I've never experienced something that, culturally, I would *only* have experienced if I had been here as a child, the immediate response is "that's so weird!". Anything I bring up about England that isn't the exact same as what they'd expect from the US, "that's so weird!". Sometimes they even go as far as questioning why other places don't "just" do it the same way they do.

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