>How's it going, lads?

Swimmingly.

TOOOOONYYYYYYY

We've no more predicted frosts here but the last average frost date isn't until April. It's going to be a month of temptation.

>>469259

You can tell it's spring because I've had to hear some dickhead drilling all morning. Isn't it interesting how that works, I'm sure I'm going to love hearing every cunts DIY project when it gets hot enough to necessitate leaving the window open.

If someone could now arrange to have the fire alarm on a vacant property lose mains power supply that would be lovely.

>>469266

It was chainsaws here all weekend. Either one of the neighbours has cut down all of his trees, or there were several neighbours at it. I'm not sure.

>>469266
>I'm sure I'm going to love hearing every cunts DIY project when it gets hot enough to necessitate leaving the window open
>Experts predict a severe season for allergy sufferers
https://www.bbc.co.uk/weather/articles/cwyd747q953o

Oh I guess I'll just wither and die then like a delicate orchid. Are those Russians still offering a nuclear winter?

>>469266
I have been trying to get a company to knock down my garden wall and put up a new one. I can’t do it myself because I won’t be able to get rid of the old wall. No fucker wants to come round. Now we’re into that time of year when everyone will want to pay people for fences and whatever, so I will get shafted even if someone does offer to do it.

Last night me and my mate were talking about Starmer and Trump's meeting and I joked that Starmer looked like "brined pork" sat next to Trump it's high-tier jochular bantering we get up to, we should start a podcast or something. Anyway, it occurs to me that all I did was convergently evolve the "gammon" insult that's been around for years without realising it until earlier this morning.

Anyway, it's going fine, thank you for asking.

>>469261
It looks like it's been sat on.

I don't know if this is a thing, but are there headphones I can use on PC that mean only I can hear my PC's sound, but with me also being able to hear my environment?

My partner moved her office upstairs and I don't want to disturb her with my computer audio, but I still need to be able to hear out if the doorbell is rung.

>>469271
Found out it is indeed a thing (transparency mode). Unfortunately at prices I'm not willing to pay just to avoid being a minor nuisance.

>>469271
Could you try open ear/bone conduction headphones like joggers use?

>>469271
I use "clip on" earphones when I'm out and about for essentially the same reason. They might look a little awkward and uncomfortable, but even while wearing glasses I've not really had any issues.

How do you know which hairstyles will suit you?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lr8y2r1oEm4

>>469275

Try a few and then just hope you won't go bald in your 30s. And take it from there.

I saw a lad a while ago, no older than his late 20s, with what I can only describe as a Justin Bieber combover. He was visibly bald on top, but was covering it up with a few strands of longish hair from the side. And then styled in a kind of frizzy Justin Bieber way. Which seemed like the worst of all imaginable worlds.

>>469271
Yes, they're called open back headphones.

>>469278

An excellent option if you've got separate offices, but open back cans will leak enough sound to piss off someone in the same room.

>>469279
Otherlad said his partner's office is in a different room?

Currently in between ovens and down to a pair of electric hobs, an air fryer and a microwave. Let me tell you, inspirition is very much not striking, even given my status as the best cook on .gs.

>>469281
Did somebody say, Just Eat?

Went in for a haircut today and it looks a bit wonky, which I only realised when I got back home. It doesn't look terrible, but it's still a bit off.

>>469282
I'm dieting anyway so I'll "just eat" leaves for the next couple of weeks... until I noticed I bungled "inspiration" into "inspirition" ealier, so instead I'll seppuku myself out of shame.

I ordered a pair of fancy dress shoes and they make a loud clack clack sound when I'm walking around. Makes me wonder about the sounds of the street back when traditionally made shoes with leather soles were the norm. Must've been an entire cacophony of clack clack clacking. I don't fancy announcing my presence with every step so I'm gonna need to add some rubber pads to the soles or summat.

I wonder what other little things along these lines separate the ages. I once walked past an AC Cobra that was stuck in traffic and the petrol fumes from that one car alone made the entire street stink. I love sports/muscle cars from the 60s but I never really thought about how stinky day to day life must've been back then.

>UK asset manager Abrdn renames itself Aberdeen

https://www.ft.com/content/06b01a4d-ffc2-4f08-bc43-eeffd94e4d18

I think everyone knew the Abrdn rebrand was stupid as soon as it was announced.

>>469286
Can't really imagine a situation in which I give a single shit either way.

>>469285

Before the Clean Air Act, most urban buildings were jet black with soot.

Deodorant wasn't really a thing until the late 70s and most people only bathed a couple of times a week, so everyone stank of sweat, but it was masked by the stink of fags.

Crime was utterly rampant. Cars didn't have immobilisers or alarms, so they were trivially easy to steal. Burned-out cars were just a normal part of the streetscape in a city like Liverpool or Manchester and it was rare to find a bus stop or phone box that hadn't been smashed up. Similarly, house fires were vastly more common in the days before flame-retardant furniture and the days when chip pans and smoking in bed were normal.

>>469285

>I once walked past an AC Cobra that was stuck in traffic and the petrol fumes from that one car alone made the entire street stink.

A friend's dad has a 1970s Triumph TR6. It's good fun, but you can smell it from 50 feet away with the engine on. There were practically no emission standards back then. And if you look closely, the exhaust gases have a blueish tinge, like many cars did back then. Oil seals weren't what they are today.


>Deodorant wasn't really a thing until the late 70s and most people only bathed a couple of times a week, so everyone stank of sweat, but it was masked by the stink of fags.

In the 50s, you would only bathe once a week and then just wash the key areas every other day with a washcloth. The greasy hair you see on many people in photos from that time wasn't just pomade. It wasn't uncommon that people would only wash their hair every two to three weeks.


> Similarly, house fires were vastly more common in the days before flame-retardant furniture and the days when chip pans and smoking in bed were normal.

There were also no smoke detectors. It's estimated that smoke detectors save thousands of lives in the UK alone each year by either enabling you to put out fires before they spread, or by being able to get out in time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gj_aHCpZl4k

>>469290

What are you lads giving up for lent?

>>469291

I decided to tidy the back of my hair up with a razor and now I have agonising razor burns on the back of my neck. They're very visible too, so can hardly claim to have actually "tidied" anything, as now it looks like I might have a disease.

>>469285
I've noticed this with older cars too, not even especially powerful ones unlike the Cobra you saw. They'd probably crucify me for saying this on a proper car forum, but if I was incredibly wealthy I'd buy beautiful retro cars, have the ICE ripped out and put an electric motor in. Perhaps a nigh impossible job in reality, but ultimately car nerdery is the same thing as trainer nerdery and as such not something to be taken too seriously.

>>469291
The will to live.

>>469271
You can get closed-back headphones that pipe some ambient sound in by running the active noise cancellation gubbins backwards.
I've got a pair of these, from when Amazon were remaindering them, and they do it. https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B08N6XJN8L
It works ok - and they're nice enough, so would recommend, but not necessarily at list price. Comfy enough to sleep in on a plane, too, if you care.

>>469293

> but if I was incredibly wealthy I'd buy beautiful retro cars, have the ICE ripped out and put an electric motor in.

There's already a growing trend of restomods. The term doesn't exclusively mean converting classic petrol cars to electric, but a part of that movement does just that. Like the Jaguar E-Type that Prince Harry drove off with on his wedding day.

As a lifelong petrolhead, I'm in two minds about it. On the one hand, it's a great way of preserving automotive heritage for the coming decades and centuries, and I'm sure an electric E Type is blindingly fast compared even to an original E Type with the biggest petrol engine. But on the other hand, it takes away from the experience. Classic cars from a few decades ago have every right to be smelly, greasy, and all around environmentally irresponsible. Because they are a relic of their time. And in real terms, there's only a handful of them on the road compared to tens of millions of more modern everyday cars, so it isn't going to change our collective carbon footprint meaningfully one way or the other. If you want to have a car that is environmentally friendly, then by all means and almost without caveat, an EV is the way to go. Nobody can reasonably argue against it. But to us petrolheads, who will be a dying breed anyway in the future, it just doesn't feel the same.

>>469290

I swear I never saw that clip in my life until a year ago and now it seems to follow me around.


>>469291

My boiler packed up yesterday and I don't have the cash to replace it so I suppose Im giving up body temperature and washing.

>>469293

EV conversions are relatively straightforward these days, albeit quite expensive. Several companies make bolt-in kits for popular classics.

If you wanted a classic car with an electric engine and brakes that weren’t shit, wouldn’t it be easier to do this to a replica rather than an original one? There must be a company out there that will put Delorean bodies onto Teslas rather than the other way round.

>>469291
I'm giving up cocaine. I don't even do cocaine, but I figure it's the thought that counts.

Just ate a whole tin of chili con carne from Asda. Seemed like the least amount of effort.

Maybe not such a good idea, as I've got a two-hour evening seminar tonight.

It's perhaps not entirely earned, but I'm of the opinion that my impoverished upbringing and long simmering frustration with the world around me gives me a degree, albeit a minor one, of commonality with some of the stories portrayed in a lot of the rap music I listen to. This is despite never being more than three feet from a dairy cow and being as white as their milk. However, I'll admit the Danny Brown lyric that's been stuck in my head and that I can't stop mumbling to myself while I'm doing whatever ("this that black lives matter, still sniff cocaine") is completely out of my wheelhouse and I really need to expel it ASAP.

>>469295
I am sympathetic. It's certainly a shame that a fine hobby like yours is potentially going to be the preserve of museums and dedicated historical groups, in the manner of steam locomotives, one day.

>>469297
But is anyone doing it for one of my dream cars like pic related, that's the question?

I miss giro day. It used to create a real sense of community spirit.

I'm seeing someone who has had to work abroad for a week so we've mostly been keeping up with messaging. I reckon I'm pretty bad at this, I don't really do 'owt or think to take pictures of myself so I'm not sure what I'm supposed to talk to her about.

I sent over a picture of a pancake with a smiley face made in whipped cream and said that I drew her.

>>469285
This is why I've rarely worn some proper nice boots I got a few years back. I got them for the ice for I've never been able to break them in because they make a right racket when I'm walking down the street - especially with my heavy feet.

Do any of our readers have a similar problem? I also avoid treadmills.

>>469287
You'd care if you were an archaeologist from thousands of years in the future who can't work out how words are pronounced. If you think that sounds daft then you're not going to enjoy the near-eastern history at all.

You can get a free Whopper from Burger King today.

>>469305
I've already given myself stomach ache with a bacon and egg sandwich this morning, so I'm okay.

>>469305
I always find a Whopper and a Big Mac disappointing.

If I'm having a Burger King, which probably hasn't been for a few years, it has to be a bacon double cheeseburger.

Here’s a thought: in 2004, Poland joined the EU. Famously, many Polish people migrated here, often working as builders. They built this country for us, or have been doing since 2004 anyway. Now, whenever I look out of the window, I think to myself, “This country looks like shit. It looks like Poland probably looked 20 years ago.” Do you think the Polish immigrants did that on purpose?

>>469306
>>469307
Fucking hell, you lot get free food and you're still complaining.

>>469308
You don't see new sinks with separate hot and cold taps anymore so I think that on balance it was a good thing.

>>469309
I never complained, I said I didn't want a burger. I don't even know where the nearest Burger King is anyway.

>>469308
I don't think we can blame the Poles unless his name was secretly Dawid Kaminski the whole time.

>>469305
Thanks ladm8, just had one. Burger King cravings sated for another year.

Since putting on a bit of weight I've noticed I have much less energy. It's ridiculous how easily I'm getting tired. I definitely need to be more active.

>>469312

Get out there, lad. Because it can become a vicious circle. Where you don't have the energy because you've put on the weight, which in turn then makes you gain even more weight.

>>469311
>Burger King cravings sated for another year.
I ternd to avoid burger king as, whenever I've eaten there, the taste lingers on my stomache all day. It makes me wonder the quantity of artificial flavours in their meat.

>>469314

I avoid fast food altogether. Especially now with inflation and skimpflation, it's just overpriced for what you get.

I remember a time when a Big Mac was just over £2.

>>469315

I used to have a Chinese or a pizza at least once a week, usually a Friday treat kind of thing. Over the last couple of years I have had one maybe once every three months, only when I'm completely arsed to cook. I don't know how they are staying in business because the prices are just daft even if you're loaded, I don't know who wouldn't feel ripped off.

>>469316
>a pizza at least once a week, usually a Friday treat kind of thing.

I see you've cut down your pizza intake.

>>469316

>I don't know how they are staying in business because the prices are just daft even if you're loaded, I don't know who wouldn't feel ripped off.

And yet, places like McD or Burger King are still packed in the evening or at the weekend. There's a McDonald's about a mile from here, and whenever I go past it at certain times of the day (ok, I confess, now and then I get takeaway coffee from there, because their coffee prices aren't as outlandish), you see entire chav lower class families having their dinner there. So apparently they've still got the money for it, but I'm sure it bites them harder than some higher earners.

As kids growing up, we were always disappointed that our parents wouldn't go to McDonald's with us, like some of our friends always did with their parents. But my mum was a passionate cook and very insistent on us eating healthy, and looking back, it was probably for the better. Because your relationship with food is shaped in your formative years, and you definitely pass it on to your children.

I'm going to see what all this Burger King shit is about. I'll see you in a few hours.

>>469319
Big Whopper has got to you. Wake up, sheeple.

I'd post a fight club image but I'm too done.

Just found out my storage unit got sold at the beginning of February, with my entire life in it up to 33. Whoever got it is gonna be fucking laughing. Tonnes of retro games, books, few bits of nice furniture. Thank fuck I got my Pokémon cards out of there a while back.

Anyway, I called safestore in mid Feb to check, and was told it was all fine and to make payment asap (my unit had already been sold). The manager I contacted today told me they had no seller info, but IBid says they do so I'm waiting for a call back on this...

Anyone know what to do in this situation? I'm in shock. Haha. However the fact we spoke in Feb and I wasn't told makes me think this may still work out in my favour somehow. Am I just going mad or is that possible?

Weird question, but are there fewer slags around these days? Are young women more demure, or have I just lost the ability to recognise the kind of woman who will wank you off behind the bins for two WKDs and a packet of fags? Have apps fundamentally changed the sexual economy, or was this an earlier change related to the death of lad culture?

>>469321

They normally can't just sell your unit out of the blue. You must have been behind on payments for a good amount of time, and were probably given written warnings that they would sell it.

Check your agreement, and what it says about arrears and termination.

If, based on the circumstances, they were within their rights to cancel your contract and sell the unit's contents, then you're a bit out of luck. Your only hope is then to buy it all back from the buyer, but you're probably not in that kind of position if you've been struggling to pay your rent.

If they sold your unit despite you fulfilling all your contractual obligations of recurring payment, or paying off your arrears in time, then the sale is null and void, and you have a right to regain possession.

In any case, depending on your financial situation and the contents of your storage unit and what they are worth or mean to you, I would hire a lawyer.

>>469322
I'd say people are far less hedonistic than they used to be in general.

A lot of young people are boring as fuck.

>>469318
>As kids growing up, we were always disappointed that our parents wouldn't go to McDonald's with us
As a kid, McDonald's represents a great success. As an adult it represents failure.

>>469321

https://www.safestore.co.uk/getmedia/b967db9b-479d-4dcf-b0ca-528d98580b36/Licence-Agreement-Feb-25.pdf.aspx

>17.2. If any sum payable under the Licence is still outstanding one month after the service of written notice from Us requiring You to pay all outstanding amounts in full, or if You fail to collect the Goods after We have required You to collect them or if You fail to collect the Goods on expiry or termination of this Licence, We may in Our absolute discretion:
>[...]
>17.2.2. send You a further notice in writing setting out the amount outstanding at the date of that notice and informing You that, if You do not pay the outstanding amount in full within 14 days of the date of the notice, We will sell some or all of the Goods as if We were the owner of the Goods and will pass all ownership of the Goods to the buyer. If You do not make payment in full within the time limits set out in the notice to sell, You authorise and consent to the sale or disposal of all Goods without further notice regardless of their nature or value.


You'll have to see which parts of that apply to your case. But if you didn't pay your arrears in time, then they had the right to sell your stuff, as per your agreement. Even if you rang their staff and they said to you on the phone that it was fine, you're still on shaky ground because you probably don't have it in writing.

Why do my film cameras, where the paint has worn away to expose the brass, smell distinctly of garlic?

I had a complete wood pigeon invasion here just a minute ago. I've got a bird feeder in the back garden that attracts a good bit of wildlife, but six or seven wood pigeons all at the same time was a bit much. I tried to take a photo of them for .gs, but I guess I startled them and off they went.

>>469328

The metal doesn't smell, but it reacts with the oils and acids on your skin to produce various smelly compounds. If the smell annoys you, a quick buff with some wax furniture polish will seal the metal and prevent the problem.

You reckon t'pope's gonna die, then?

>>469331
Nah 'e's immortal in ar' father's 'evenly grace.

>>469331
Well, eventually. It's pretty much inevitable in the long run. But will he outlast the hypochondriac who posts here?

>>469327
Thanks for the info and not roundly calling me a twat for getting into this. I was going through a wobbly and didn't see their emails over the period of termination, but saw invoices still coming in. My registered phone number got disconnected and my secondary contact didn't answer the phone when they rang. I don't think I have a leg to stand on there because I'm guessing that if you're not recovering from something in hospital then it doesn't really count as being out of contact.

>Even if you rang their staff and they said to you on the phone that it was fine, you're still on shaky ground because you probably don't have it in writing.
I've got it in writing now, from another guy there who confirmed that I spoke to his colleague 3 weeks ago, 2 weeks *after* the sale, and was asked for ~£1,000 payment to be made by the end of that week, He even updated my secondary contact info because I told him my secondary contact had moved out (he hasn't, he's just a twat).

"My colleague was new" is the reason they gave in writing for why I wasn't told on the phone at the time, or given any followup email.

I've asked for it to be escalated to head office because while it can be argued I cost myself the extra 2 weeks after I was asked to make payment, they provably cost me the several days between that. I also stated that I made 0 commitment to paying at the end of the week, and as I was unemployed and going through a mental health episode I could only try and pay as soon as possible and wait for any notice of termination.

They've not contested any of this in writing and confirmed bits and pieces. I asked for it to be escalated to head office. They've also contacted the buyer and it's on their volition to get in touch with me. He's got my entire childhood lol. I hope he isn't a twat. I'd even help him sell some of it, just...fuck, the marvel comics. Fuck. Galactus' first appearance in original print from my dad's attic. lmao I suck. Fuck. Some of this was family stuff.

I know I've dug my own grave here but life's been hell for a year and I'm impressed I didn't kill myself, but now I feel I've lost an anchor I need right now.

I swear that 'toastie' bread used to be a lot thicker than it is these days.

I've just spent £20 on EuroMillions tickets. What should I treat us to when I win the jackpot?

>>469337
With that jackpot you should be able us at least three, maybe even four Freddos each.

>>469335

>I don't think I have a leg to stand on there because I'm guessing that if you're not recovering from something in hospital then it doesn't really count as being out of contact.

Termination notices don't require acknowledgement by the recipient, especially not if they follow the rules set forth in your lease agreement which you both signed. As long as there is reasonable assumption based on the circumstances that the notice has reached or should have reached you or your second contact, there'll be little you can do. Out of contact would mean that neither you nor your second contact had a reasonable way of receiving the notice. That's about the only way a termination notice can be kept from going into effect, and you would have to provide proof.

All you can really do now is appeal to their good will. And possibly that of the buyer. But it could be that they hear stories like yours every other day and aren't receptive, because there are always reasons like yours why somebody's got arrears and forfeits their storage unit.

I know it's hard to get caught up in things when you're going through a rough patch, and before you know it there are stacks of unopened mail and unpaid bills on your kitchen table. I've been there. But the best thing you can do is grit your teeth and open every letter and e-mail that comes in, right on the day, no matter how unpleasant. Because not attending to unpleasant mail or e-mails has a tendency for even more unpleasant consequences over time.

My bank just charged me £4 for using their customer car park the other day, while the barriers were up, although one of their staff told me a while ago that that usually means there's a malfunction, so that parking is free of charge for anybody who enters and exits during that time. You've normally got a 30-minute period where it's free for you as their customer, and after that, it's £2 an hour. You have to swipe your debit card and it's then directly billed to your account.

So I called them and asked why they charged me the four quid, given that I didn't even swipe my card, on account of the barriers being up. So they would have had no way of knowing I was even there. But they told me they installed ANPR a while ago, and were able to match my number plate to my debit card from previous times that I used their car park. Which seems a bit dodgy, because I don't think I ever agreed to it, but they told me there's a sign with fine print at the entrance that says that by using their car park, you agree to them gathering your number plate and debit card information for payment processing. So I said, but what if it was somebody else entering through the open barriers with my car, and they said, well, somebody is then still using their car park, and I'd then have to ask them to compensate me. And then I said, well what if that number plate isn't even in your system yet and they're not swiping their card. And they said in that case, they do a DVLA request and bill the owner by post.

Bastards.

I just realised "gamer" is going to become the male equivalent of "spinster" in the coming decades.

It's cold again. I think I was experiencing photosynthesis, I don't want to go back.

>>469378

I turned the heating off two nights in a row, that's going to save me at least £15 quid on next month's leccy bill. Last night I turned it back on but at the lowest possible setting just to make sure it takes the edge off.

Electric heating, fuck my life. Worst decision I've ever made, but I am stuck here now, oh well.

>>469380
Have you considered a blanket or comfy hoodie?

>>469381

I have a wonderfully warm dressing gown which I wear near permanently through the winter. I can run the heating far lower than most people would and be comfortable. Sometimes I visit customers for work and it feels like a furnace in their house.

But you can't get away without heating your property at all, a blanket and a hoodie won't prevent damp and mould and other such issues that come with our climate. Even at minimal settings, and only having the radiators turned on in three of five rooms, it's still ridiculously expensive.

>>469383
Can't you just open the windows for a bit and let the air circulate?

>>469384

That only works when it's not wet outside too. I don't know if you actually live in England but our weather, especially over the winter, is hardly known for its dryness, is it.

Go on, what's your next genius idea, "Have you tried living somewhere warm instead?"

>>469385
Have you considered taking up smoking a pipe?

>>469386

I've been trying to get off the crack honestly.

Literally moments away from getting into bed and I remembered I have washing hanging out. Stupid memory, I should start drinking more.

>>469389

Similar thing happened to me just now. Forgot to put the bin out for tomorrow. I have my local bin schedule stuck on my kitchen wall, neatly printed out in colour every month, but I keep forgetting to look at it at night.

>>469389
Have you considered remembering things?

>>469391

DO YOU REMEMBER SPANGLES? DO YOU REMEMBER CLACKERS? DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT I LOOKED LIKE BEFORE I GOT INTO CHEMSEX?

>>469390

Only slightly related but the bin men didn't show up last week, it seems they missed our estate entirely. Nobody has given up hope yet, everyone's bin has been out on the road since Thursday. I reported it to the council yesterday, because everyone around here is old and probably doesn't use the internet, I might have been the only one who did.

There's no option for "you have clearly neglected an entire postcode prefix" so what I've technically reported is they've forgot my bin specifically. I assume that sort of report goes ignored, but I'm hoping the student collective a few blocks away might have been more likely to mass report.

>>469391
Hey, come on now. I'm depressed enough already, I don't need that bollocks.

>>469394
Have you considered seeing your GP and getting 6 weeks of naff CBT and some pills that make you feel like a robot?

>>469395
My brother, I am 10 steps ahead of you.

Just fixed our family's old sewing machine, a Brother 345 from the 1960s. Well chuffed with myself. The electric motor was burned out, and it's next to impossible to find a modern motor with the same or similar enough specs. I guess technology has changed. Anyway, found somebody on Gumtree who was selling that exact motor for £15. Can't complain.

Old appliances like that are a lot like vintage cars. Some parts can fail, and they can be temperamental, but they're usually of such simple and straightforward design and construction that almost any hobbyist with a toolbox can fix them.

The sewing machine itself is built like a tank. Its body is cast iron and all the motion comes from an intricate set of all stainless steel levers, gears and camshafts inside. Old sewing machines actually had camshafts not entirely unlike those in your car. And when you watch it spin with the top cover removed, it actually reminds you of an engine. Altogether, it literally weighs about 30 lbs. There's probably a reason why this machine has been in our family for 60 years.

>>469395

I'm not sure I see how cock and ball torture would help this situation.

>>469398
I'll try anything at this point.

>>469399
Have you tried putting your underwear on the radiator overnight?

I'm gonna have wraps for tea when I get home from work. How do I elevate them? So far I'm thinking of:

- Shawarma.
- Allioli.
- Pomegranate seeds.
- Pepper.

With flavoured cous cous, salad and roast chickpeas on the side.

Someone from the council came to look my shared home, and I've just found out that they may be issuing an emergency prohibition order by the end of the week.

So how has your week been going?

>>469402

£370 for an new exhaust system on my car. Could have been worse, my local garage are pretty decent, but I've been putting it off for two months because I knew it would be pricey and didn't have that kind of money to hand. This month was the first month since about November that I was going to have money left over at the end of the month but now I won't.

I'm not having to cut out any essentials or worry about money overall, it's just getting to be a bloody arseache how there's always one thing or another comes up and then I have to spend another month telling myself "Next month, don't worry, next month you can treat yourself to a trip somewhere, next month you can go out for a few drinks. Next month."

>>469402
I got cowboyed at my house. I asked a guy to come round and quote me to fix my roof. The last lot charged me £350 and did absolutely nothing that I have been able to see, but today’s roofers looked at my roof and saw what they’d done, and quoted me £2000. I fancied living dangerously so I paid it. They kept ringing me to tell me they’d found things that would increase the price, but I told them I wasn’t paying any more, and four hours later, they were done. I paid £2000 for four hours of replacing a roof tile and doing admittedly quite a lot of pointing. I’m such a fuckwit and everyone who has heard this story has lost respect for me so far.

However, I have spent the past few weeks really feeling like I had too much money. I spent £250 over the weekend on going out, going to John Lewis, buying a pillow, buying underpants and socks, and then also buying some new curtains. My current bank balance has been a danger to my wisdom. That bubble is now burst and I no longer feel rich at all. I am back to my skinflint ways.

>>469404
Get a load of Mr. John Lewis pillows over here!

>>469405
I am wearing my new John Lewis underpants and they are the business. It’s been a while since I have owned a pair of boxer shorts that were this easy to piss out of. Well worth £28 for three pairs.

>>469406

I just don't wear underpants any more. For work I have a few pairs of "boxers" that are actually pyjama shorts. Maximum comfort.

But if I am at home I am not restraining my giant cock or balls at all, it'll be commando at all times, if indeed I am even wearing bottoms at all.

>>469407
Do you enjoy a chafed penis?

>>469408

The entire point is allowing the appendage to freely move as needed, thus eliminating any chafage, entrapment or compression hazards.

Tight underwear was invented by the Quakers to supplement circumcision and a shit diet in their war against healthy male sexual function.

I don't much care to have my chap flopping around. Maybe I'd feel differently if my cock was massive too, but I was not so blessed.

Doesn't it get cold when you're out during the Winter? Mine does.

>>469409

>The entire point is allowing the appendage to freely move as needed, thus eliminating any chafage

Movement is what creates chafing, though.

I've worn briefs all my life, and I can't imagine any different. Especially not boxer briefs that Murrikins apparently wear under their pants. I tried that a few times, one of my exes got me a three pack of them for Christmas once, but I couldn't quite figure out how you tuck the briefs under your jeans without them showing and looking bulky. And they were uncomfortable, because I noticed that I don't like my stuff moving around in my pants the way it does when you're wearing boxers.

I've been catching up with Gladiators on iPlayer and I'm convinced it's rigged. If there's a large points gap between the contestants then the Gladiators quite clearly go easy on the one behind while targeting the one in the lead so that there isn't too much of a head start in the eliminator.

>>469411
>Movement is what creates chafing, though.

Have you considered wearing boxers that are not made of sandpaper?

No but seriously, if you have an intact penis with its nice snug turtle neck keeping the head safe, I can't imagine how rubbing loosely against nice soft pyjama style cotton (or any other fabric really) is enough to at all bother you.

>>469404
>I fancied living dangerously so I paid it.
I haven't actually paid it yet; I just agreed to pay it. Tonight, my friend went to the pub and asked various tradesmen she knows how much I should have paid. Allegedly, I should have paid about £300 rather than £2000. And I haven't paid it yet, of course.

My roofer rang me earlier asking for the money, and I said I would check out his work in daylight, tomorrow morning. He's going to ring again because he can't leave me alone. But I think I might offer him £1000 instead of the £2000 we agreed.

Do I have any legal rights here?

>>469414
Hire some extras and a big camera and stage a taping of Rogue Traders.

Either that or offer them £500 and a pair of lightly used John Lewis knickers.

>>469415
He phoned me five times before I’d even got up, but I still paid the full £2000 in the end because he gave me a giant sob story that I was “discriminating against me because I’m a traveller.” I wasn’t doing, and I didn’t even know, but perhaps I need to train my gypsy-sense because even a good honest job-having one like that turns out to be better off avoided.

>>469414

Imagine if you quoted somebody two grand to manage their IT and they tried to get away with paying you one. Fucking weasely middle class rat bastard, pay him what you agreed.

>>469418
Would you pay someone £2,000 for replacing an ethernet cable? Being that much of a rube is far more symptomatic of being middle class than telling someone to piss off for doing basically sod all.

>>469419

Of course I wouldn't, but the point of refusal is before the work is carried out. If you agree to pay £2k to replace an ethernet cable, more fool you, but once you've agreed to it, you've agreed to it, fair and square.

If the other party botched the job, and therefore didn't hold up to their end of the agreement either, that's another matter. But so long as pikeylad actually sorted the issue I don't think egyptiancottonlad has a leg to stand on.

>>469419

Not sure if it's middle class, but it always costs money when you're not handy to do jobs around the house yourself.

The work otherlad had done sounds a lot like something that somebody without two left hands could have done themselves in a weekend. Maybe the roof tile was in an inconvenient or less accessible spot, but as long as it's not right at the top of a gable roof, I'd probably replace it myself.

A while ago, my boiler wasn't working properly. I got a quote on the phone from an HVAC place and told them the fault code on my boiler's display, and they said that at the very least, it meant they'd have to replace the cooling fan assembly. Being very familiar with my boiler's make, they said it was a job that's usually about £500 for the cooling fan assembly and some £200 in labour. I asked them if they couldn't just fix the assembly, but they told me it'd probably be even more expensive. I then went on the Internet where I was able to find out that my particular fault code was usually caused by a particular 100 uF capacitor on the circuit board going bad. Luckily I had one of those exact capacitors in my parts bin and replaced it, which costs around 80p. And the fault hasn't occurred since.

Most handiwork isn't rocket science. Look at the people you've had in to do jobs around your house. It's not like most of them are Mensa members. They probably just barely left school with their GCSEs.

>>469421

I'm handy, but I draw the line at roofing. I wouldn't get pikeys to do it though, and I'd always get two quotes for any job costing more than a couple of hundred quid.

Remember that big fat musician who was popular a few years ago? He was called something like Beefcap or Pufferman or something. He was rubbish.

>>469423
Rag and Bone man?

>>469421

Most stuff just takes a bit of google searching, it's just a matter of having the tools and the confidence to have a go. Not everybody has the tools, and I can't blame somebody not to have the confidence messing around with something that could be dangerous like a gas boiler.

You say it's not rocket science, but you only had the wherewithal to know what an 80uf capacitor is and how to go about replacing it because you're a big nerd, if you didn't have that background knowledge already, it would have taken a significant bit more homework, and you wouldn't be 100% confident to do it because it'd be your first time even using a soldering iron.

Personally I am fine doing anything involving electricals or general DIY hammers and nails kind of stuff around the house, but I can't do much with my car because I lack the tools and don't have a private driveway or garage where I have the space to safely start taking it apart and mucking about. That's why garages exist though innit, not everyone can do everything, so you pay other people to do it. That's how the economy works.

>>469424
Yeah, yeah, that was it. Thank you, NMElad.

Having a curry on a weeknight was a mistake. I struggled to do anything last night and I'm struggling today, I just want to sit on my arse watching an old movie.

What foods do productive people eat?

>>469427

Chicken and rice. No condiments. Final destination.

>>469425

What does help is that I'm a big Arduino nerd, and over the years I've built dozens of standalone circuits that all involved extensive soldering of some kind, and it also gave me a good working knowledge of what components on a circuit board do. I've also been doing all my own car repairs for over 20 years.

I didn't mean to point fingers and be judgemental about people who are just out of their depth with all these things. Everybody has their own areas of expertise. My point was that it's fairly easy to learn a good bit of those practical skills without a need for formal training.

I'm not sure where I draw the line. I've also run 230V wiring through the basement and garage here, with power outlets. I read through Part P and BS 7671 regulations and made sure I understood them and did the work to those standards, as well as general health and safety regulations for electricians, and then just went ahead and installed them. I can confidently say that it wouldn't look much different if I'd called in an electrician.

Should you be messing with high voltage wiring and do those kinds of installations if you haven't a clue? Absolutely not. In that case, it really is dangerous and can kill you. But in the end, the required knowledge isn't wizardry. You won't have the same level of skill as a trained electrician. But on the other hand, that electrician didn't spend his years of training just running wiring through a basement.

HAIL STORM.

I bet most people don't even realise how much space you save when you take your Chicago Towns, fish pies, and lasagnes out of the cardboard box before you put them in the freezer. Absolute mindless NPC drones most people aren't they.

I also took the plastic drawer out of the top couple of shelves because what's the point. Got about a month's worth of lazy arse microwave meals in there now (although it'll last far longer because I only really eat them when I work lates.)

>>469433
Chicago Town pizzas went to shit when they changed the sauce.

>>469432
That was a very brief storm. You must be close by.

>>469425

I spent most of my life wondering why more people didn't just google stuff and try it, and never really figured out it was simply because it's so foreign to them they lack the confidence to even try it.

I only really absorbed this when I talked about it with someone who knows me far too well, and they said "yeah, well a phone call is easy too but it took you about three days of working up to it to ring BT"

I think I might be turning into one of those crusty old men who boils a perpetual stew every day. I've been persting with boiled lentils and onions but I can't keep it from boiling over. Not only that but I haven't washed my cothes in a month and seem to becoming increasingly retarded.

>>469436
I’m the poster who agreed to pay a gypsy (I didn’t know he was a gypsy!!!!!) five times the going rate to fix my roof, and I had multiple friends and relatives genuinely beg me not to attempt my own roofing. I wanted to try it myself, but I allowed myself to be dissuaded. These friends do all joke amongst themselves that I am bad at I-refuse-to-say-adulting, and I guess they were right.

>>469435

I had it too. We do all live within 30 mile radius of Beeston though don't we.

Had McDonald's this evening. On an order for five people there were five items missing, which seems to be a not uncommon occurrence with them. I can't ever recall going to a Burger King and having them not bring everything out.

>>469438

If you're not good at DIY, then there's no shame in having somebody do it for you. I did some minor work on some roof flashing a few days ago, in an area of my roof that's pretty safe and where there's no immediate danger of falling off, but when I looked down, it looked a bit scary, because I was still a good four metres off the ground.

I guess my ambition to DIY most things around the house comes from my parents. They weren't penny pinchers, and they never had to be, but they both knew their way around saving a bit (and sometimes, loads) of money by not always calling in experts to do jobs that are reasonably straightforward.

All this talk about DIY has got me wondering. The pipes under my kitchen sink were designed by a spacker, so I had to call in a plumber to unblock them at least once or twice a year, at £80 a pop. Once I got the gist of what he was doing, I ordered an electric drain auger for £100 and have since saved hundreds of pounds unblocking my own pipes. Could I run a decent side hustle as a simple unblocker of drains or do I need to be a certified plumber?

On gypsies: how does one even tell them apart from regular Irish people? I once shared drinks with what I presumed to be a normal Irishman, but then realised he was a traveller when he started talking about his amateur boxing career, and then threatened to punch my lights out if I didn't give him £10 for the sips of whiskey he offered. The amateur boxing thing didn't seem to be an idle boast, considering he had hands the size of hams and those fucked up knuckles you see on boxers. I told him that it wasn't very sporting of him, considering that I'd given him a can of beer and some fags, and this reminder defused the situation - as if he'd momentarily forgotten about my reciprocity, or maybe he was testing to see if he could get away with it. Had I known he was a gyppo from the get-go I would've continued walking on my merry drunken way and would not have engaged.

Maybe it's the kind of thing that comes from being around enough Irish people and gypsies to tell the difference. As a city-slicker, I don't know enough about them to not get into weird situations. On the flipside, I've seen enough country bumpkins get robbed at raves to think that they have no idea how to tell roadmen apart from regular black fellas.

>>469442
My gypsy wasn't even Irish, to be clear: if anything, he sounded like a Geordie with a speech impediment. I wouldn't trust an Irish roofer just because I've never met an Irish person who wasn't exceptionally well-off, so any tradesmen with Irish accents are probably gypsies in my experience.

>>469442
>>469443

In my experience they generally don't sound Irish, they obviously have similarities in the accent but it is its own distinct and quite recognisable thing. I suspect most of them know well enough by now that they are better off hiding it and trying to speak a bit more normally, though, because anybody with an ounce of sense immediately and entirely distrusts them once they've been clocked as a pikey.

Personally though I just don't trust strangers until I have a reason to believe they are trustworthy, I'll make smalltalk but you keep your guard up until you get a read on them. Maybe that's what growing up in a rougher area does to you, but spend enough time in and around the smoking areas of dodgy pubs and you learn it's often hard to gauge at a glance who's just a friendly drunk, and who's a nutcase you should avoid.

>>469442

>Could I run a decent side hustle as a simple unblocker of drains or do I need to be a certified plumber?

Yeah, there's no law stopping you. The homeowner could sue you if you really fuck something up. You'd only need qualification if you did work on gas systems.

>how does one even tell them apart from regular Irish people?

Gypsies and Irish Travellers are two separate ethnic groups, although travellers often refer to themselves as gypsies. Travellers have a distinctive accent, but I don't know how to describe it in text. If you assume that any tradesman with a vaguely Irish accent is a traveller, you'll be right more often than not. Proper gypsies (i.e. ethnic Roma) can't be bothered with being rogue traders, they just shoplift, pickpocket and beg.

>>469445

>Yeah, there's no law stopping you. The homeowner could sue you if you really fuck something up.

Also, you'd be a bit of a one-trick pony if all you did was unblock pipes with a machine. What if the blockage is from tree roots growing through clay pipes? That's where your job would end, and where a real plumber would earn a tidy sum either lining the pipes or doing earthworks to replace them.

>>469449

An Amazon delivery driver seems to always get confused on his route and leave packages for other buildings in my downstairs delivery box. I didn't think much of it on Monday and just put it on the end of the boxes so he can realise his mistake but then it just ended up back at my box.

So I thought fuck it, it's a thin package anyway and Amazon will have refunded the recipient by now. I'm not going to ring some strangers doorbell to drop off something small a few days after he's reported it missing. I put it in my bag when I was going out shopping so it looked like I was going to drop it off for the building security cameras and then snuck it up to see what's inside. I now have a rose-pink iPhone charging cable, a guilty conscience and evidence to dispose of.

What am I going to do with a rose-pink USB-A cable. Everyone will know I've nicked it or assume I have some mistress who has left it behind. And there's the package label I need to get rid of as well. Frankly a life of crime isn't for me.

Getting proper full fibre broadband put in next week me.

I noticed CityFibre had come along and put a box in downstairs without telling anyone at some point last year, so I've been meaning to do it for a while, but I was still tied into the remainder of my contract with BT either way. Now that it's expired I am straight in there on one of those introductory offers.

Apparently I'll be going from ~30mbit to full gigabit. I'm excited, it's gonna be like when we first got broadband at home when I was a teenager. I'm going to download so, so, so much porn.

>>469453
>Getting proper full fibre broadband put in next week me.
I thought you were talking about toilets. Like, you'd changed your lifestyle to include a full fiber diet.

I'm still rocking 30 down 2 up, it's never been much of a problem saving for a days worth of downloading if I ever buy a new game.

I've mentioned it before but I find there's little reason to bigger is better. Greater download would encourage higher resolution, larger file transfers and godknows what else I'm unaware of, each demanding greater electricities. Doesn't seem worth it for a bit of convinience. In truth I wouldn't know what to do with it.

>>469454

I've never minded too much, other than as you say, waiting 12+ hours to download a new game. I can stream perfectly fine, online gaming is acceptably fast because it hardly takes any bandwidth anyway. I can still download a film in 10-20 minutes or a couple of dozen albums in half an hour. I don't rely on piracy as much as I used to as a younglad but it's definitely nice to have when you want something that's not on the streaming services.

But I think part of that is likely just purely the fact I have been used to it, all the way into my early 20s I never even had internet faster than 1 or 2mb/s, I only briefly had faster than that for a couple of years when I was in a flat that had Virgin cable broadband; and that was pretty crap for the price too. Every now and again though, I am reminded how these speeds are absolutely rubbish by modern standards. I was at a friend's a while ago and suggested a game to him, which he bought and had downloaded within fifteen minutes. Meanwhile I had left my computer on at home because it would take all night just to download a patch for Stalker 2.

Either way, I am still paying more for my current connection than I will be for the new one, so there's no logical reason not to switch.

I have got Wordle in two guesses on three separate occasions in the past week and a half.

I know three male primary school teachers and two of them are gay. Is it a stereotype?

>>469458
The stereotype is that straight men working with kids are carpet-baggers and that kids are all dirty nappies. I used to work with children and then when I got bored of office work I briefly became a nursery teacher, you definately do have a filter at work.

Just had a Murrikin in front of me in the queue at the service station. I gathered that he just got off the plane a few days ago, and he got chatty with servicestationlad, and kept saying that fuel prices were incredibly expensive over here, and something like, "How do you guys afford this?". Servicestationlad then pointed at Septiclad's Nissan Juke hire car outside and said, well, a car like that probably gets better fuel economy than a big American truck. But Septiclad said, "Yeah, but still... eight bucks a gallon... that's scary!".

Bless them. Unimaginative lot.

>>469460

They're just trying to be nice, bless 'em. A lot of it really is just that default cultural norms between the US and here completely clash. We don't like small talk, we do it just to take the awkward edge off; they genuinely and earnestly do. Likewise, our way of showing warmth and friendliness is by taking the piss out of each other, whereas they don't understand it and take it genuine hostility.

Total tangent here but it's a wonderful thing this internet really, I've learned more about other cultures than I would ever have hoped to if I was born a couple of decades earlier. That's how I justify it to myself that I have more friends on the internet than in real life, at least.

I've had my £15 thermos flask from Mountain Warehouse for little over 3 weeks, refilled multiple times a day, and it's already broken. I can't find a failure in the lining nor is it leaking, but I can feel the heat seeping through it's double layer and it holds for less than an hour now when it say's 8.
Can't really complain considering the price, but I wanna.

>>469461

It's nice to know that if I'm ever sent to war against the Russians, I'll be able to hurl insults across no man's land in their own language.

>>469463

All that time on online shooters will will absolutely feel worthwhile when we can shout CHEEKI BREEKI IV DAMKE over the parapet. Maybe get a couple bits of cardboard and spray A and B on them, and put them up at either end of the trench for extra bantz.

If they're putting .gs lads in the infantry, myself included, then whatever war we're fighting has long passed the point where we stood a chance of victory.

>>469463

I was online friends for a few years with a Czech lass. Back when Skype was in its heyday. She always shared much of her family life, including pictures, Czech customs, the lot. She never really wanted to tell me any good Czech insults, but at least I know now that copious amounts of slivovice go with just about anything, for any occasion from funerals to bachelorette parties.

We lost contact at some point. Ana, you were good fun. And I would have, if you'd lived closer.

>>469466

Czech ex learned me a few, "ty vole" meaning "you steer" is either an endearing term like to a mate, or a bit like when you sarcastically and patronisingly call someone "pal" if you say it to a stranger. "Buserant" is literally faggot, and you don't use it unless you want a fight. There's all the ones that overlap with Polish and Russian like piča (pussy), čubka (bitch), kurwa/děvka (whore/slut/prostitute), yebat which more or less means "it's fucked" or sort of like, "fuck [thing/person]", etc. Their grammar is daft as fuck though so it's hard to make them more elaborate without a deeper understanding of the language.

Did she tell you about the fish in the bathtub at Christmas? Fuckin' Slavs man, crazy folk. Love 'em.

I find that an hour is a very long time for a lunch break when I'm WFH.

The news ticker/adverts on my phone that I can't turn off just said something about Starmer abolishing the NHS.

>>469467

Right, I think I knew kurwa. But other than that, she always said she didn't want the first things I'd learn in her language to be "ugly" words. She was very sweet in that way.

>>469469
“NHS England” is some supervisory body or something. It’s not the NHS. But if you’re getting those AI news alerts that make stuff up, then they could well have said he was abolishing the actual NHS. He isn’t, though; he’s just abolishing NHS England, which is not the same as the NHS in England.

Comically .gs problem: I've got a real hankering to buy an old Peugeot 106 as a project car, but there's no way that my girlfriend would fit in it.

>>469472
That never stopped Johnny Sack.

Does anyone remember that televised meditation broadcast around the 90s/00s, perfromed by a young kid around 14 years, over the course of a week or so?
I remember being mezmerised by the event but I can't think how to search for it online.

>>469472

This post has made my evening, lad. Thank you.

Get it anyway.

>>469472

>but there's no way that my girlfriend would fit in it

Is she very tall?





I know you're probably fattychaserlad.

Why the fuck is my TV licence now £15 a month?

Toying with the idea of using 'hyphenated' as a slur prefix.
>Shut it, you hyphenated penis.
Thoughts?

>>469524
I think everyone's a bit too tired for that kind of whimsy these days, it also implies you don't know what "hyphenated" means, or that you're at least okay implying you're someone who doesn't know what it means. And we, after all, who we pretend to be.

>>469525
I'm not sure I'd become someone who doesn't know what hyphenated means just by misusing it. I was enjoying the mental imagery of a penis with an abruptly very thin part half way down the shaft.

>>469521

Moreover, why are you paying it?

>>469527
I am wondering that. I think all I watch on BBC is Gladiators.

>>469527
It’s the right thing to do, even if it’s optional. I’m a big fan of the BBC, but I stopped paying my TV licence when I moved, because I was so angry at how they would write to me before the licence had expired telling me I had to pay already. The plan was to only steal TV for a few months, or maximum one year, but I think I’m up to three years now and they still haven’t tried particularly hard to find me.

What I don't like when I'm feeling poorly is when my balls feel really heavy and achy.

>>469530
Tried this one with the nurse when I was in hospital and it didn't go well.

>>469531

A man is in hospital after an accident and his entire head is wrapped in bandages. A nurse comes in and the man says, "Nurse, are my testicles black?". The nurse replies, "Pardon?". So the man says again, "Are my testicles black?" The nurse, with a look of bewilderment on her face, says to the man, "I can't imagine that they would be. Dou you want me to check?" The man nods. And so the nurse lifts up the sheets and the man's hospital gown, has a feel of the man's testicles, and says, "There is nothing wrong with your testicles!" The man then manages to push the bandages up from his mouth a bit and says, "Thank you, nurse, but you didn't have to do that. What I wanted to know was, are my test results back?"

>>469532

Yeah we've heard that one before.

ARE YOU A SARDINE

The bastard car needs de-icing for the first time in ages. Fuck this.

>>469534

I hate the weather this time of year. It's generally warm enough during the day you'd be sweating in your Big Coat but it will still be chilly on the morning and evening, even drop below zero on a night. Your car will be frosted over in the morning but if you get in it two hours later when the sun's been on it it'll be like an oven inside. Preparing for going outside just gets to be a nuisance.

I wish it was basically 17-18 degrees all year round.

I'm writing a story as practice, not a very good one. And I want to put a passage about meeting someone, and say something like "I don't believe in physiognomy, due to it being a pseudoscience, but if I did believe in it, I would assume that this man is likely to be a bad person", because the narrator is a stupid retard. Later on he says something like "I don't believe in physiognomy, due to it being a pseudoscience, but if I did believe in it, I would assume that this man is likely to be trustworthy".

Could that be construed as racist. The men in question aren't described in any way beyond having the physiognomy of a bad person.

I haven't written in 16 years and am hyper aware of indirectly creating racist ideas in people's heads and I don't want them to think I'm racist. This is just my idea of a recurring joke that I found funny (due to the total lack of description beyond good/bad facial structure so the audience can imagine it themselves) as I was writing but now feels racist and unfunny.

>>469536
How many people do you expect to read this story? It doesn't seem racist to me at all, but I can imagine maybe one person in a thousand might think otherwise. Without meaning to be rude, I don't think 1,000 people are going to read your story, so I say go for it.

>>469537
Nobody will read it. But I don't want to put implied dolphin rape in it even if it's for my only my own perusal. What if I die and my family go through my computer and read the story and generate racist imagery in their heads?

>>469536

It's only tedious online outrage addicts who perceive a character's thoughts as somehow representative of the author's thoughts. Those people's opinion should be ignored, because they philistines. Hugely immoral and deranged characters like Patrick Bateman or the Joker or whoever else are often by far the most compelling; those characters are how we explore the uglier side of the human experience, and that's one of the biggest reasons art exists.

>>469536

I once wrote a song about an army liberating a village, and taking all the young women as payment (based on the emperor's children in 40k) Everyone I've shown has found it funny. With the exception of a fisherperson academic who is so far gone due to horseshoe theory has committed several sex crimes. I'm sure you will be fine.

>>469540

>fisherperson academic who is so far gone due to horseshoe theory [she] has committed several sex crime

Tell us more. And give me her number.

>>469541

I am sure they are a they by now, apart from when it suits their position to just be 100% female I am sure. So I'm sure you just commited a transgression. No kind of proactive effort to transition mind just an intellectual game.

Was at uni with them. Their ex who they started uni with is still one of my best friends. He had some horror stories about her being manipulative and trying to present him as an arsehole like displaying bruises she had on her arms from him restraing her attacking him. Towards the end of the relationship she very much wanted to have her cake and eat it, by being back and forth with him whenever her lesbian ventures fell through. She was essentially talking herself into full political lesbianism but her own neurotic insecurity held her back. I imagine she is fully now.

I would say they probably fell for every bizarre fisherperson theory that required only a basic understanding of biology or physics to disprove. You know like how rockets are deliberately shaped like penises, that sort of thing.

Actually the best thing they ever did for me was let me read one of their source texts and it was so heavy on the idea that men as a collective group deliberately used sexual assault to maintain power it actually put me off conspiracy theories for life, because in that moment I was fully aware of what the other side of the fence is.

Even as a student they got several disciplinary hearings for not really taking no for an answer and being stalkerish. But of course how could they be with their lack of power.

I lost direct contact with them after uni and me leaving Facebook last real thing I heard was via a shared friend 10 years ago getting up to their old tricks and being questioned for misconduct at whatever institution they were at (I believe some sort of gender studies specific place out in eastern Europe).

>>469542
What's a political lesbian?

>>469543

Fucked if I know, but it's a thing.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Political_lesbianism

A political lesbian is someone who becomes a lesbian for political reasons.

Basically when your over-fishing become strong enough that you will your sexuality to be different.

So we're on about Britta?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=144S78aTLOI

>>469544
>>469545

You reckon it happens the other way round where lads just get so sick of women's shit that they take up cock instead?

Let it be known that I don't actually have Longstanding Issues, I am just Politically Gay.

>>469547
The problem with kissing men is the facial hair, in my opinion.

>>469547

I know men who are asexual largely because of the abuse from their parents. I imagine that might strip the fun out the idea for you though.

>>469548

Guess that's why god gave us femboy twinks. Shame they invariably hit the wall eventually though, I'd have to be like a bumder Leonardo DiCaprio.

>>469550
You wouldn't exactly be breaking new ground, so to speak.

I think it would be nice if I could go one month of my life, one month, without having Gang Bang by Black Lace pop into my head.

>>469551

The bloke who played Cartoon Head in Ideal was also the voice of Pingu. Not a joke, it's just the strangest bit of TV trivia I know.

>>469547
I do still wonder if my closet homosexuality is really a fear of intimacy with women.

This year my daughter's school will be decorating potatoes for Easter instead of eggs due to allergies. Seems like nonsense to me.

>>469550
Unfortunately the hot ones are both much rarer and pickier than fit birds. Much easier to stick with shagging women.

>>469550

My missus recently said, in the context of me going to Thailand, that she wouldn't consider it cheating if I shagged a lady boy over there. I thought she was joking but apparently not.

I don't know if this extends to local femboys, but for all I love my girlfriend she is shit at blowjobs, so maybe I should take the pass and use it.

I thought this was strange because she can be quite jealous when it comes to other women. Maybe it's the same sort of thought process that lads have when they say they wouldn't mind if their lass copped off with another woman.

Anyway I'm pretty sure I'm not gay, I've never found myself attracted to a man who wasn't going out of his way to look like a woman, but the knob doesn't put me off at all.

>>469558
Check her bookmarks, you might have a fujoshi on your hands.

>>469558
Would she consider it cheating if she lezzed out?

I heard about simfree smartphones and presumed they're basically wifienabled mini-computers that can make calls via VOIP rather than an actual mobile phone, but searching for 'simless phone' is only bringing up handset deals that don't include nor tie the device to a single network.
Was I wrong to think a 'simless smartphone' exists exists? I want a device with all the functionality of a smartphone but only when it's connected to a local network. Like a mini laptop.

>>469561 E-sims are a thing, where there's a not-a-sim soldered down. However, why not just buy a phone you like and not fit a SIM? My tablet has a SIM slot that I've never used and likely never will. Could you just buy a small tablet without a phone bit? The telephony section of your phone doesn't add much cost or power, and if it's the tracking that worries you, I don't know how to help. Perhaps an OS build without phone support, or open the phone and butcher anything that looks like an antenna, while hoping not to knacker the wifi?
Anyway, get a small tablet, install a SIP client if you like.

Turns out if you put the prepackaged udon noodles in boiling water for a few minutes and prod them occasionally they separate nicely.

>>469563
I shall try this next time I have udon noodles and report back.

>>469557

Can you get femboys with vaginas? Has gender science advanced far enough to make such possibilities a reality yet?

>>469565
My friend, there are new horizons so brilliant your eyes will struggle to behold them.

>>469560

Yes, she would, which is the bit I don't get. She would probably consider vague flirting with another woman as a serious transgression (not that I disagree), so I don't really understand why she would be fine with me being balls deep in a thai bumhole on a sex tourism romp.

Perhaps it's some sort of test. But I would certainly not be too cut up if she dumped me for doing something she explicitly said she was fine with. I'm not even going to Thailand, by the way, so this doesn't really matter.

>>469559

She is/was a fan of Heartstopper, which as far as I understand it is a graphic novel series about teen boys being gay for each other. Perhaps you're on to something.

>>469568
If that's the case then I'm confident I've hit the nail on the head. Obviously you'd know better than I.

I measured my feet at the weekend and got considerably shorter than what I had thought my feet were. After double checking using a pen and some carboard, I decided to to go a shoe store and nothing fit in my supposed new shoes size.

Broken Britain

Can any of you lads feel electricity? When I touch certain parts of what are supposedly grounded/insulated electrical items like the casing of laptops and some light fittings they feel sort of vibratey or even sting a little. Only when they're plugged in and on, it's really tangible. I assumed it was normal but I've asked other people to touch the same things to see if they can too but nobody ever seems to.

>>469572 yes, absolutely. It's leakage current, which is inevitable in a double insulated mains powered product, but has to be kept below a feelable but far from lethal current, as part of getting your product CE (or UKCA) marked and on to the market. Stuff that will have a direct connection to the body, rather than through the skin, like medical products, has to meet more stringent limits.
Some people can feel it more easily than others. It also depends on how thick your skin is where you touch the item's metal part, and the rest of the circuit - insulating shoes mean there's much less current. If you tend to wear ESD-safe footwear (or bare feet), you're more likely to feel it. If a product with an earthed metal case tingles you, though, something is deeply wrong, since the leakage current should be going home through the earth wire, not through you. This tingle is only acceptable on double insulated products, with no earth.
Some products either push or violate the limits - if you have a product or power brick that tingles a lot, I'd be tempted to ditch it unless it's really precious to you. Some of the failure modes may be cumulative - one layer of protection may have failed, and the second may be hanging on by a thread, after which you'll be on a Big Clive video.

>>469572

A lot of appliances will leak a small amount of current to earth. Older electrical installations sometimes have a small potential on earth due to bad insulation. Back in the day when I was doing tech for bands, I'd regularly get small shocks from various bits of equipment. It was fairly common for singers to get a tingle when their lips touched the microphones, or for guitarists to get zapped from their strings. People only occasionally died.

>>469572

Yes. I had my laptop on my chest once (yes I was having a wank) and when I moved the laptop slid and bumped into my mouth, I got a zap on the teeth that I still remember and fear nearly ten years later. Teeth are rather sensitive, evidently.