I'd like to be playing Star99 right now, because it looks and sounds exactly like an online multiplayer take on Twinklestar Sprites for the Neo Geo (split-screen vertically scrolling shoot 'em up with Tennis mechanics).

Can I fuck get a game going though.

I've spent an hour or so trying to play I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream, but as it's the first 90's adventure game I've played since I was a small child with a meagre collection of PC Gamer demo discs, I'm not really getting the hang of it. Also I'm not sure why Harlan Ellison is voicing AM. Not that all video game AIs have to sound like Helios from Deus Ex or SHODAN from SS2, but ultimately the hateful, rage-filled, techno-apocolypse made manifest just sounds like a guy and it doesn't really leave an impact on me. I read the short story instead.

I might try again with the game, because there's lots of unique stuff in there and the art's very interesting, but I'm not sure. I do think the idea of a malevolent planet sized computer is a great setting for a game with mechanics from this century though, so if anyone knows of anything like that, do let me know. It definitely makes me sad there's not quite this level of writing in many games these days, though I'm sure there was plenty of stupid, uninspired, crap in the 90's too.

Say what you want about Cyberpunk 2077, but it has the most elaborate penis customization of any game released this year.

>>24585
There's still time yet.

>>24585

I doubt it can beat Honey Select 2.

>>24585

My missus told me she had to move the size slider very far end to make one that looks like mine. Then she complained that it was clipping through her trousers and I said "Now you know how I feel."

I've left it open for you to make a witty retort about the very small end of the slider, and that's fine, because I'm winning the Euromillions tonight.

>>24590
30 minute tobogganing session at Castleford XScape here we come!

>>24590

Dick Slider is what my missus calls me on date night.

Either of you two managed to download the Kaiserreich for Darkest Hour - 1.9.3 Version zip? Mediafire seems to have shit the bed but it's a Christmas tradition that I play it.

Paradox "games" are crap. You'd have to be some kind of an IDIOT to enjoy them.

Please do not look at my Steam "most played".

>>24596
I'd play Kremlingames only I like to have a rough idea of what I'm doing when looking at spreadsheets.

I've got a £15 Microsoft voucher for doing online surveys. What Xbox games should I blow it on?

>>24598
Perhaps a popular game that you don't yet own, in a genre you like.

I've been doing lots of racing with my wheel in Assetto Corsa Competizone. I'm very, very bad, but you do see little improvements here and there and it's very rewarding in that way. You really need to remind yourself it's a "simulation", because if I was this bad at any other game after ten hours of playing I'd be phoning myself an ambulance. I think I need to pick a single car and stick with it, and probably not the, by racing car standards, very old V12 Vantage, even if it does sound way better than anything else in the game. Also, I don't know if I need a larger monitor or a better prescription, but my eyes felt a bit funny just now after a couple of hours driving. Maybe I'm just not that used to focusing for such a long time and it's actually good for them, but probably not.

The game has a couple of flaws itself. Firstly is that plenty of things are locked down in licencing nonsense, but that's the trade of with it being an official game, I suppose. Secondly is that the game doesn't really tell you anything about the cars. How you're supposed to know which engine map is which or even basic stuff like top speed and engine placement is a mystery. I know you can figure some of it out, but not having it viewable in game is really weird, especially when much of it is on official forums in posts made by devs anyway. None of it's top secret manufacturer info, it's literally all there in game already, you just can't see it. I really can't stress how odd this is to me.

The pic is what you see in storm conditions at the start of a race. I'd post a better screencap, but I've not done anything impressive enough to warrant me watching my replays back so there aren't any.

>>24627
Speaking of racing games, I've reached the conclusion this week that Forza Horizon 3 > Forza Horizon 4.

Borderlands 2 VR.

It's not amazing, but it's playable. Some bizarre desicions though, like making menus slowly oscillate in 3D space and cramping the HUD really close to your face.

>>24627

The original Assetto Corsa is in the Steam Sale at the moment. It's not as pretty as Competizione, but there are loads of mods available.

https://store.steampowered.com/app/244210/Assetto_Corsa/

https://assettocorsa.club/

I've spent way more money on Total Warhammer DLC than I probably should have this year, but it's just so much fun. There are problems, but, Christ, there's so much craft and energy pouring out of the game, with loads of different campaigns each with little twists to keep them interesting. I won't say it's not overpriced, because it is, and Steam not having to clear physical stock and having frequent sales means the base price of the games and their DLC never goes down, even when it really, really should (*cough* Beastmen *cough*). However, I look at the time and money I spent on Paradox games in the past and I struggle to understand it. Partly it was having an interest in history and a crap computer, so it's not like I was tricked, but I definitely played myself. I only bring up the comparison because a YouTube reviewer did so and ever since then I've been unable to forget it since. I guess people enjoy what they enjoy, ultimately, so who cares.

Like I say, it's overpriced, there are problems here and there, there's not much of a story (not unusual for the genre but it'd be nice to have), but when you think about what a game offers over other forms of media, Total Warhammer does it better than maybe any other title I can think of. This all sounds a bit bum-kissy, but the first posts ITT about the game were from me umming and ahing about whether it was worth buying at all, so I've definitely been won over on merrit.

>>24700
It would be absolutely superb if, using the battle part of the game with a pared down economic aspect, a serious developer or CA could re-do superb game campaigns like Shadow of the Horned Rat and Dark Omen. I suspect there are other campaigns in the canon that could be standalone expansion campaigns/DLCs.

I felt a little bit disconnected from the base campaigns in TW:W2 because there isn't the party/follower personality dynamic that made SotHR and W:DO worth playing to hell and back. Still a grand TW game though.

Metro Last Light (2nd in the Metro series) is currently free on gog and the first instalment is only 3 quideroonies.

https://www.gog.com/game/metro_last_light_redux

>>24701
Some shorter, narrative focused campaigns would be brilliant. I think that's what the Vortex is, kind of, but I'm moreover thinking of something like the Italy and Egypt ones from Napoleon, if you've ever played that. And much like they did for people who didn't know about Bonaparte, it would help people like me who can't tell a High Elf from a Halfling. It would also be great for multiplayer to have a campaign that was nice and concise, although I've played the head-to-head multiplayer campaign mode and that keeps things interesting even when you're nowhere near your opponent.

I started replaying GTA5 to overcome my immense disappointment with CP77. I originally played it on the Xbox360 and I'm loving that the PS4 controller has police lights flashing when you're being pursued, and that the phone calls come over the speaker on the controller. It's maybe a bit gimmicky but is a nice touch.

Also, I was pretty high on my first playthrough 7 years ago so have forgotten most of the missions and it's feeling like a new game to me.

Pathologic HD is 99p for the next day if you want to get it. Apparently this is normally £9.99 but that can't be right.

Anyway, I'm enjoying it so-far and knew I would when I first saw human portraits in an RPG selection screen which I have a major soft-spot for. Having just read Fathers and Sons I'm pretending I'm Yevgény.

Modding Skyrim appears to be getting more and more complex.

>>24738
Tell me about it. I used to have a perfect set up with textures, relighting, meshes, till I took an arrow to the knee.

>>24739
Well, that's an incredibly bold reference, but this is pissing me off. Just randomly stopped booting now, this Vortex thing is shit.

>>24738
>Cycle

Because it looks like a bike frame? ...I'll get me helmet.

Just started playing UFO: Enemy Unknown and wondering it it's worth starting over my save with OpenXcom or whatever it's called because they say the release game is full of bugs?

>>24744
OpenXcom is said to fix a lot of issues of the game while retaining the core feel.. i haven't tried it extensively but it's generally recommended.

On the topic of buggy games, one of you lot once told me Vampire: The Masquerade was an all time great RPG. Well, I finished watching a play through of it last night and it looks like a massive heap of arse, just awful. If I'd played that on the recommendation I'd be suing.

>>24752
I remember having to install some sort of unofficial patch to make it playable, but after that it's pretty good if you're into Deus Ex style 1st person RPGs

>>24752
You have bad taste.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uMotVIbyk1w

Are any of you lads looking forward to Deadhaus Sonata as much as I am?

It'll probably be shit as it's free-to-play.

>>24753
But Deus Ex has very good gameplay mechanics, Vampire looked all over the play.

>>24754
It was also excessively corny in a childish student film sort of way.

>>24756
It's an RPG about vampires in California, that's part of the appeal. You'll love it if you play it because you quickly get into the lore and cheesy setting. If you hate it then maybe RPGs aren't for you.

Don't pay a penny - this is a guilt free piracy and the mod patch is a necessity as development was cut short.

>>24757
There might be good stuff in there but it looks grindy, trite and is aesthetically ugly. For years I just knew the game had a "rep", but for some reason assumed it was for being comically bad until the sequel was announced and everyone was chuffed. Well, it seems I was right after all. Equating it to Deus Ex is barmy.

>>24758
It's not much like Deus Ex. If you want good combat, you'll have to go elsewhere. That said, the only grindy bit is the sewers, and you won't get that far unless you like it.

The game is full of memorable bits. If you don't like the writing or the setting, then you're not going to get anything out of it. It's okay, not everyone is cut out to be a creature of 90s goth darkness.

>>24758

It's just one of those very marmite games. You either love it and think it was amazing, or you bounce right off. I wanted to like it but couldn't, much like Morrowind.

My personal one is Stalker. I've definitely spent more time in the Zone than I have in bed with a woman.

>>24760
Stalker was an original mash-up of Chernobyl and Roadside Picnic. Since then every Ukranian and his dog seems to be developing another game along the same lines, in the same way Western developers can't let go of zombies.

Why does Steam demand so many updates to my games? They're working fine, i don't need any more fixes.

>>24762
Because "works on my machine" isn't actually a helpful reply to a steam community post.

>>24762
That's not Steam, that's the game, why would Valve be updating other developer's games? And while we're on this topic Vampire: The Masquerade is still really bad.

Look at this image, really look at it, look at the damned fern there. It's completely pitch black isn't it? Apparently grasses and what have you in Skyrim aren't effected by ambient light. It probably isn't an issue with the vanilla lighting where nighttime just makes everything pale and grey, but with the mods I've got it looks terrible.

I know this probably sounds insane to some of you, but this is a definite "can't unsee" moment for me. I might even turn all grass off it's so distracting to me.

MY EYES!

>>24766
Those are sprites. I'm no developer but I can see how it would be more difficult to code dynamic light for a 2D surface than a 3D one.

>>24768

They aren't sprites, they're texture mapped planes.

Skyrim is old and the engine it's on has always had incredibly shite lighting so it'll just be to help the performance a bit.

>>24769
Oh, are they ackchyually?

You know what really stings? I very happily played through Skyrim at 1366x768 at lower-than-low at an unstable 25 FPS in 2013, I knew it could have been much better, but it was a nice little virtual D&D, but now it's butting up against my high expectations and suffering as a result.

GOG icons are so uninspiring to look at.

This is Elder Scrolls canon:
>"...Lady Ghisiliane, an Altmer noble who held grand hunts away from Summerset, where mortals and exotic creatures were brought in as quarry. She ran a kidnapping ring to populate her hunts with fellow mortals. She invited the local elites of society, including other Altmer, to participate in her games."

Who knew what when?