>>5815
You have quite feminine legs, m8. I can't stop thinking about them resting on my shoulders while I thrust into you with wild abandon. Is that medical advice? Perhaps.

Sent photos to a doctor and she said it was massive, she sounded genuinely incredulous on the phone until I'd sent some pics through. She said the rash was quite big as well, probably inflammatory reaction and should be fine with some antihistamines

>>5819
Thanks, I'm gorgeous. I also have long eyelashes and very fine eyebrows. I'd probably be a dream otter if I didn't find men physically repulsive.

I have piles.

>>5824

Eat more fibre, drink more water, get more exercise.

I cut my calories by around 1000 a day and have been doing up 40-60 minutes more intensive exercise five days a week. It's been a month and there's no appreciable difference to my weight. Is this not long enough to see a difference? Should I be exercising more? Is it possible I'm building muscle fast enough to replace lost fat resulting in no weight loss?

>>5835

How are you tracking your calories? It may be that you're off with your estimate of a 1000 calorie deficit. I'd recommend just focusing on switching out calorie dense foods for micronutrient dense foods for a week, and eat until you're completely full. If you track that, you can use that as a baseline for comfortable fullness, then the next week you can cut overall calories by 250 - 500.

What's "an appreciable difference"? Are you weighing yourself at a consistent time each day and under the same conditions? Hydration and food weight can sway your weight by over 1kg, easily.

Credit to you for sticking it out for a month, and I'm sure you've seen some positive changes (are you getting stronger or are you developing better endurance from the exercise?), but the problem with starting out on a big deficit and five days per week of training is it doesn't give you much room if you decide to cut down further. Believe me, you don't want to be living off less than 1300 calories a day and trying to do two-a-days, it's gruelling and unsustainable.

>>5836
>How are you tracking your calories?
I stopped drinking and I'm not eating any more than I did previously. Without alcohol I no longer have junk food cravings so that's gone too.
>What's "an appreciable difference"?
My weight so far is just fluctuating around the same figure. My scales are a bit fucked so it's hard to get a meaningful reading from them but it's around the same 81, 82 kg mark.

Physically I'm feeling better and my extremities are visibly more toned and gaining muscle. It's just the lack of change in the one definite metric that is weight.

>>5835

A kilo of body fat contains about 7700 calories. Moderately intense exercise burns 400-600 calories per hour.

It's possible that you're gaining significant amounts of muscle, but the more likely explanation is that you're under-estimating your calorie intake.

>>5838
That's a lot! I'll keep increasing the duration and intensity at a reasonable rate but try to be more conscious of portion size too.

>>5837
I recommend myFitnessPal as a way of recording your calories properly. You're probably undercounting your food.

>>5840
I'm happy to exercise more and be conscious about what I'm eating but using an actual calorie tracker and limiting myself to numbers means I'm going to spend half the day hungry, with low blood sugar and unable to sleep or function properly because of it.

>>5841
No, you don't have to do any of that. You just faithfully record a food diary in an application that has a database, like myFitnessPal - and then you actually get a proper reading on how many calories you are consuming and why your exercise perhaps isn't getting the results you want.

>>5842

It says I've eaten 501 calories today (1404 in, 903 burned exercising) so that's 999 under budget.

>>5843

>903 burned exercising

I would caution using those numbers, they will rarely be accurate.

>>5844
If it's less than +/- 1000 I think I'm probably doing okay.

>>5845

Agreed, just saying though.

This myfitnesspal thing is making me look at my nutrition/vitamin intake too and it's a bastard of a catch-22 trying to get the iron levels up. Seems like I have to either have basically no iron or far, far too much vitamin A.

>>5847
I think its particularly brilliant for that and the nutrient breakdowns it gives you - even when I was hitting the right number of calories per day, at one point my diet was almost entirely carbohydrate.

Its for this reason I think it's a really useful tool, even if you're not yet following a diet plan; I think it gives you very useful insight into what and how much, you're actually eating.

>>5848
I can see the appeal of following a diet plan out of sheer laziness in that it'll tell me what to eat instead of having to think about it.

>>5849
That's exactly why I find following a diet so easy.

>>5849
And yet you called me weird for eating Pizza Hut every day.

>>5851
Weirdo.

>>5851
Given the repetitive nature of my diet nowadays, you were years ahead of your time and I was wrong.

>>5848
It is a little like I predicted. Weekdays are fine because I'm burning a lot of calories so can eat a satisfying amount to balance it out but any rest day (for me, the weekend) I can only eat 1500 calories total so I'm actively hungry for hours including when I try to sleep.

>>5854

You might consider introducing more satiating but low calorie foods on your rest days. Don't overdo it or introduce it too quickly (mainly for the sake of your arsehole), but potatoes and other fibrous vegetables, or simply a fair whack of whole fruit, can really do a lot to make you feel full without getting a lot of calories.

I consider myself to have a really good appetite, but something as simple as a big orange can leave me feeling full for ages.

I've started drinking this guy's smoothie every day. He claims it's more or less "nutritionally complete". Is it good? Could it be made better? At the very least, I know I'm consistently ticking off at least a couple of my five a day where I wasn't before.

tl;dw it's spinach, kale, banana, strawberries, blueberries, flax seeds, chia seeds, milk. (He adds oats, peanut butter and protein powder too but I skip those, I probably get enough fat and protein from meat.)

>>5856
Based on the thumbnail alone I'm going to say no, purely on the basis of that smug cunt face he's pulling.

>>5857
>Based on the thumbnail alone

>>5856
How can anyone be in need of nutrients when Huel already provides them?

>>5856
But then you won't chew anything. Chewing is important.

>>5860
Chewing is important for what? The continued good health of teeth? Which are important for what? This seems very circular.

>>5861

There's probably a better reason the other poster's alluding to but if nothing else you'd be a lot uglier without any jaw muscles.

>>5860

They do solid food now, which is actually quite nice. It's a lot like a pot noodle except good for you.

We've got a shit load in the cupboard for lazy meals/work lunches/apocalypse prepping. If all that was left after the end was liquid Huel, I'd take my chances with the nukes and/or zombies, but this stuff isn't bad.

Yet again Big Huel derails a thread. So no-one has anything to offer on the smoothie recipe I'm chugging?

>>5861
Yes, I've heard various people talking about chewing being important for your lower jaw, and making room for teeth (Hence wisdom teeth having to be removed since they just don't have room for them).

I read a book called Breathe by James someone, and that mentions also about having more room for your tounge, which means you have more room for air to travel down from the nose. If the jaw is smaller, the tounge sits further back, restricting airflow from the nose, and encouraging mouth breathing.

This may all be bullshit, but it sounded very plausible.

>>5865
Top wisdom teeth don't have room because of modern humanity's gigantic brains. I still have all of my wisdom teeth.

>>5862
Well according to https://www.hownormalami.eu/ I am abnormally good looking, so clearly I can afford to jettison my teeth.

Or maybe AI is just bollocks.

>>5867
All this did is confirm that I have a good side.

Started getting a sensation in one of my Achilles tendon occasionally that feels like someone is taping or flicking it seems to come just after the apex of a stretch of it during walking. No pain but I'm not sure what it means. Is this damage or a health development with improving fitness even though it is an odd alienating sensation?

>>5865
>I read a book called Breathe by James someone, and that mentions also about having more room for your tounge, which means you have more room for air to travel down from the nose. If the jaw is smaller, the tounge sits further back, restricting airflow from the nose, and encouraging mouth breathing.

Everything I've ever read about it is the opposite way round. Kids who grow up with allergies or asthma spend a lot more time breathing through their mouth because they can't get enough air through their nose. While you're still growing you need the slight pressure of your teeth pressing together and tongue on the roof of your mouth to make the jawbones spread out correctly as you grow, hence mouth-breathing as a child leads to permanently under-developed jaw and overbite.

I was lucky, I was heading down that path but I was sent to a good orthodontist who fitted me with a brace designed to force me to bring my jaw forward, and now I've got all my wisdom teeth through with no issues.

>>5882
I used to get that sometimes, it went away.

I have my first haemorrhoid. Looking on NHS it seems I'm on my own unless it doesn't heal this week.

Do they sell haemorrhoid cream in the pharmacy aisle? Which brands work best? I'd rather not talk to my pharmacist about this so my next go would be Amazon if the sudocrem doesn't work.

>>5885

They sell haemorrhoid cream everywhere that has a drugs aisle. It's a pretty common problem, I've had a couple even though I'm not really in any risk groups and my diet is, dare I say, healthy.
If it's a big boy the creams tend to do very little to help anyway. You could end up with a thrombosed haemorrhoid, which is a whole new world of discomfort.

I took my first ever MMA class last night and someone fell on my hand, now the joint between my intermediate and proximal phalange on my ring finger hurts quite badly to bend. It will bend all the way in both directions but it hurts if I'm not gentle. Does anyone have any idea how long this is likely to take to recover? I'd like to go again on Saturday but it's a bit of a waste of a tenner if I have to skip all the grappling and punching parts.

>>5887

Hands are notoriously slow to recover in certiain spots, in my experience. The fingers have no musculature, as such, only tendons. I remember I once had a slight crush injury to my thumb that took ages to feel right again, I think probably due to the (comparative) lack of blood flow compared to areas with tissue like muscle that take in more fluid and blood.

I'm never tried MMA, but I think even if punching and grappling are out, footwork and kicking are also really important parts of the sport. Can you not continue to work out while the other parts are being worked on? Or even just work on conditioning? Better cardio is never bad for MMA.

>>5888
Thanks. We only covered punching and grappling in that first class so I didn't think of that. I still can't make a fist and the end joint is purple but it's not hurting as much and the swelling had gone down. I'll be able to do my home workout routine this week and I'll probably attend the next weekend class even if it hasn't significantly improved.

>>5889

If you have a coach or instructor you can also let them know and get some advice.

Boxing was my thing, so hand injuries were always shit, but MMA has a lot more scope.

>>5889

Learn to wrap your hands and tape your fingers. There are loads of guides on YouTube and it'll save you a lot of grief. Wraps and tape will reduce the risk of injury when your hands are heathy and allow you to train without making things worse when you're injured. Your ring finger will probably feel fine if you buddy tape it to your middle finger.

When I did MMA I used to wear some wraps similar to these. The have some padding for your knuckles and give good wrist support. All without have to spend ages wrapping up your hands and they dried a lot quicker than a traditional boxing wrap. It also meant you could go from bag/pad work into grappling or vice versa much quicker. I found having the extra wrist support helped when grappling as well, because it gave a bit of extra friction when trying to engage a Gable grip and just helped stop my wrists getting bent backward.

As previously mentioned if you can't make a fist because of a hand injury you can still do bag work and get some kicking practice in or footwork. If you carry on with doing it I would definitely recommend getting yourself some decent shin guards and a good cup if you end up doing sparring. The best kind of athletic support I found were the kind that are made to be held in place by compression shorts with a soft foam flange around them.

You picked the worst time for it given ER and GPs are still overloaded, but if you can get someone who knows what they do to have a look at it. Best case it's all fine, medium case you have a permanent bony lump, worst case you lose some mobility. Hand injuries (that aren't cuts or abrasions) should be taken seriously.

I don't do any martial art but I had a (push-)bike accident which "sprained" a joint in one of my fingers. Took a few months to heal, found out during an unrelated X-ray years later that I'd actually shattered bits of my ring finger bone and it just kind of fused to together in the period I'd assumed it would take a tendon to heal. A friend of mine had an unlucky catch with a soft ball of all things which made one of his thumbs a bit sore. Not a big deal, except it shattered one of the joints and by the time a doctor got a look at it it was too late so now his right thumb is a bit buggered.

Treat hand injuries like a pain in yout balls, one day is fine but more than that you want to make sure you know why it hurts. Your body wants you to carry on and doesn't care how it cripples you.