I'll start. The skin where my groin meets my thighs peels off if I scratch it and I don't know if it's causing a bit of a whiff down there.

I've been pissing and cumming blood for months.

The ratio of blood is gradually going up.

>>5493
Why are you all obsessed with mega threads? Just make a thread. What are you worried will happen if it doesn't meet your arbitrary definition of "deserved"?

It's clear we're mostly all that kid at school who would only talk if asked a question. Your trivial aches and pains are important to us; make a thread.

>>5495
That's not fucking minor

>>5497

Maybe to you because it is different from what you are used to. Personally I'd rather have that than need glasses, we only treat the idea of being blind without technology as not a serious problem because it is so common and we have a 'fix'.

Most likely a kidney stone tore my urethra, I pass them all the time. So much so the actual number i have passed is unknowable. Never had a problem other than sometimes blood squirts out of me.

>>5496

Because that is the format dictated by the moderation and the pace of this site.

The concept that a thread could just die after an evening of talking or you might not see a thread is alien now.

Personally I am fine with most 'megathreads' except the midweek thread I think the lack of focus means they are less helpful than if people just started minor threads about what they were up to.

>>5499
>Because that is the format dictated by the moderation
I've consistently harped on about the midweek and weekend threads killing discussion for years, and other mods have agreed with me, but none of us have had a solution for weaning you all off them that wouldn't cause a shitstorm, so I don't see how that can possibly be true.

I don't even bother reading those threads anymore unless I see a report. They're banal shite.

>>5498
For the love of god, go to a doctor. You shouldn't regularly be passing kidney stones, you berk. That's not normal.

>>5500

Some of us like banal shite.

>>5500

I don't think star can exist at the same time as a constant rolling flow of ephemeral, 10 post threads. It just makes longer form threads make more sense, when basically the entire week's posts can be seen on the front page of star.

And as others say, banality is really our specialty. On top of that, I don't really see long vs. short threads making a difference to discourse, in reality. It's not like people aren't posting off kilter subjects in the megathreads, which then spawn a handful of replies, just like they would have if the thought was a separate thread.

>>5501
>For the love of god, go to a doctor.

What is it you think the doctor will do to fix the problem exactly? Take out my kidney and replace it with new ones?! How do you think I discovered I was regularly passing kidney stones in the first place?

Do you know what the normal treatment a GP recommends for kidney stones is? It is drink some water and take an ibuprofen. Just because you have no experience of life doesn't mean what you don't understand is a medical emergency.

>You shouldn't regularly be passing kidney stones

I should be, it is a direct result of the structure of my kidney but thanks for the medical lecture professor.

>>5504

>I should be, it is a direct result of the structure of my kidney but thanks for the medical lecture professor.

Then why fucking post about it in a medical thread?

Cunt.

>>5505

Because fuck you.

I think I need to totally change my sleeping technique. I sleep with a hand under the pillow and I've found myself waking up in the middle of the night more often because my hand has fallen asleep. Wasn't much of an issue when I was younger and had better blood circulation.

>>5494
This sounds like an infection, fungal or bacterial. If you call 111 or ask nicely at boots they'll give you the appropriate creams. Make sure you're wearing clean clothes and changing your towel regularly.

>>5495
This is serious. Call 111 and tell them your symptoms.

>>5504
You should be on Allopurinol and a diet which will facilitate the breakdown of kidney stones.

>>5507

Sleeping with your hand under a pillow is poor form.

>>5507
Even though I'm always fit and healthy I've always had a tendency to having cold hands and fit, and get pins and needles in them with the slightest bit of pressure on my armpits etc. I've often woke up in the night with my arms dead to the point of not even being able to clench my fist and I have to flail my arms around for a minute to get some life back into them.
Touchwood I've been better in the past few months as I've been cycling a lot more and improved my cardiovascular health a bit.
You might also want to try taking l-arginine tablets, they're good for circulation.

>>5504
I understand how Kidneys are supposed to work just fine, teenlad. An otherwise healthy person would not be given the same advice. So maybe you should have qualified your cry for attention if you didn't want follow up enquiries.

My fingers hurts from playing guitar too much.

I'm fully aware of why they hurt and fully expected them to hurt after I was finished because I haven't played in a while, but I'm going to make a post about it anyway.

Please don't give me medical advice, or I may become passive aggressive.

>>5501

I can't believe that's a real, it'd be too painful to have been ignored and "coped" with.

>>5513
Well, best of luck developing callouses again, I suppose.

>>5512
>cry for attention
>didn't want follow up enquiries.

So which is it I am doing professor, make up your mind?

This is an ailments thread on an image board mate, the entire point is to have a piss and a moan about your ailments, and you’ve gotten awfully high and mighty about the purpose of the thread pretty quickly if you think anyone is coming before seeking medical advice, and not just to complain. If you don't want a banal thread you need people to actually share interesting problems.

>>5508
>This is serious
Not as serious as you would think. First time it happened doctors were concerned it could be stage 4 bladder cancer as it has a lot of shared symptoms, facing your own mortality like that is terrifying, after that kidney stones felt like a blessing.

>>5509
Never heard about that before I'll ask my doctor about it next time we talk about this. Thanks

>>5514
I don't know what to tell you other than it is real and it isn't that painful. Most kidney stones are passed with no real problem at all, even the tearing of your urethra is something you can, not notice. It is only when they cause a blockage you get the real pain, not being able to pee is deeply unpleasant you switch from normality to intense unbearable sweating agony in seconds, I’ve felt like vomiting on the off chance I might dehydrate myself enough to not need to piss anymore., then if it clears again on its own it is like nothing ever happened and you are fine.

I've suddenly found myself much more tired over the past week. I haven't changed anything which has me scratching my head. I just feel sluggish and hungrier than usual. I'm male so I think I can rule out pregnancy.

I've tried having a rest from working out but I still feel like shit.

>>5681
I'm not a doctor, but I am a reactionary, and that sounds like something that could be nothing or the early signs of a very bad thing. Wouldn't fuck about, contact your GP.

>>5682
A reactionary isn't someone who reacts to things. I do second everything else you said though, no harm in getting a blood test or whatever.

I seem to have developed a space between my first and second molar on one side. This is most annoying because I get stringy food caught between them and have to use tweezers to pull out whatever is caught, especially when I eat steak and kidney pie.

I'm due to see a dentist in a couple weeks for a check-up anyway so I probably won't die but what can I do the meantime? There's a vicious cycle at work because I use interdental brushes to keep the space clean yet know that this is probably making it worse and if I don't then anything caught that I don't notice will cause an infection.

>>5695
Start carrying tweezers.
You're getting older, your gums are receding. Getting "long in the tooth". It's not likely to improve until you get false teeth.

>>5681 Hayfever? It can be a right cunt, and this is prime time for some of the more common tree pollens.

The fingers on my right hand ache if I straighten them and seem to be naturally crooked compared with my left. I think it's from holsojg my phone too much recently.

So after months of invasive procedures after all of your "OMG YOU HAVE TO GO TO A DOCTOR RIGHT NOW I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU COULD URINATE BLOOD!!" The urologist has concluded 'bugger if I know why this keeps happening' and life continues on regardless much in the way I knew it would last time I went to doctors about this. The only real loser here is obviously myself. But I really hope this serves as at least some sort of a lesson about not being alarmist when someone tells you something you don't understand, and the madness of online crowds.

>>5706
If you find a lump and it turns out to be benign, deciding that means you shouldn't have bothered getting it checked out, is the wrong attitude.

>>5707

I had already had it checked out before I posted in the thread previously and I said words to the effect of such but that didn't stop people screeching that I should be going into A and E immediately.

>>5708

The doctors put you through those procedures on a whim did they?

>>5709

I think that urologist just wanted to finger my arse, and who could blame her she’s only human.

Apparently they couldn’t access my previous records so everything was new and exciting to them when they discovered what I already knew, the newbie ultra sound girl got a hell of a crash course looking at all of the oddities of my urinary tract, she didn’t know what the fuck she was looking at.

>>5710
>she didn’t know what the fuck she was looking at
A typical .gs poster.

Is there any genuine medical backing for the death-grip masturbation phenomenon? I have sex approximately once every two years, and I have never in my life ejaculated into a woman. The general consensus is that this is because of all the wanking I do, and my dick doesn't know what a fanny feels like. It's not used to this situation, so it sort of clams up and gets nervous and doesn't jizz everywhere. It doesn't go soft; it just stays in the hard and ready position until I give up. Again, maybe this is too much wanking. Maybe this is wanking to things that are too unrelated to vaginas. But it could also be nerves, or some kind of undiagnosed social anxiety, or maybe my cock is too redpilled to trust the treachery of semen-thieving women who want to abduct my seed for secret nefarious experiments. Lots of things are possible.

Has this ever been researched? Would a temporary couple of weeks of no-fap help me out? Please show me some published research if you know of any; everybody speculates but I want some genuine truth (if there is any).

>>5712
>I have sex approximately once every two years

Look, there's digging we could do on the physical side (johnnies are a bit of a minefield for start) but your problem is clearly beyond physical.

I can assure you from my own experience as someone that wanks multiple times a day that death grip isn't real. Your experience instead reminds me of being wanked off in a message parlour when I was younger where it actually did take ages and where it was painful to finally cum because I was so tense. You need to find yourself a good woman and get comfortable with her is my advice, someone you will no doubt end up living inside because of how right it feels.

>>5712

Masturbation is easier to climax from for men and women, I don't think it desensitizes you to sex so much as sex is just a more complex deed to do.
So if you don't feel satisfied during sex it's likely due to lack of practice more than the 'death grip', you need to figure out how to make it work out for you.

Oh, take it from me, you can absolutely kill your dick through too much wanking.

>>5715

Take two weeks off and you'll be spaffing like an over-excited teenager.

>>5712

Dunno if it's the same, but my dick doesn't seem to enjoy being in a vagina most of the time. It either feels like it's being crushed, when she's on top, or not much at all in other positions. Maybe it's too skinny to feel much, and it doesn't help that it struggles to stay hard. It's especially bad with condoms.

Maybe I'm just gay or something.

>>5717
It's not as tight as the vice-like grip of your hand. It can't be. So you feel like you're waving your dick out of the window, even when you aren't. This is why the running joke is that you're gripping too hard, that it's "death-grip" masturbation. But I have no idea if that really is the reason why it feels this way.

>>5718

In personal experience I wouldn't say so. I wank a lot, have always wanked a lot, yet sex still feels great. I have had performance issues before, but they have been psychological. I think people are often quick to jump to a physical problem when it comes to sex, but really it's a minefield for anxieties and tension.

It could also be that your dick isn't hard enough, mind.

>>5695
>>5696
It turns out that I'm in shit order. That or I'm getting proper fucked by my dentist - £600 for a night guard on top of frequent cleaning and another filling.

So on the grinding part, how do I stop being stressed lads. I thought I was good with stress, people say I'm chilled anyway but now I'm having to consciously think about not putting my teeth together. My advice is to not get old.

I've already called 101 and looked online, I'm expecting a callback within 6 hours, so by 1am. It's not painful, but I can feel something. Live just round the corner from a hospital so if anything changes I'll probably get a cab there.

I've had a tightness in my balls over the past few days, and I thought it was maybe muscle strain from fucking my knees on Crib Goch and waddling down Snowden. Though a couple of days before, I was wanking in bed and I felt one of the fellows settle into some sort of socket, and I had to lightly dislodge it back to its travels. It could be years of wanking catching up with me.

It mostly feels like a tightness around the base on the left and right, like my balls are trying to retract or I'm wearing really tight boxers. Now it's still not painful, the right one was aching very slightly earlier but then it went to the left then disappeared, but I just feel incredibly uncomfortable, and I can't tell how much of it is in my head.

Anyone had something similar? No discolouration yet, they both look and feel (with fingers) fine. But I feel like you feel when you're almost done recovering from being tapped in the balls, but it could go either way again. If you lads ever feel slightly burpy when you're almost recovered from a tackle smack, I've got that. Not sure if the rest is in my head as I'm proper squeamish.

I'll be sad if I lose my balls, though just one wouldn't be so bad. Not even frozen any sperm, could leave a teaspoonful in the freezer for the lass when the pill wears off.

>>5773
The "socket" you mention is a real thing. I think all men have one; you can put your balls in there with a bit of effort and it's absolutely fine to do so. Transvestites do it on purpose, but I have certainly never done it nor even attempted such a thing.

>>5773

Testicular torsion rapidly becomes absolutely excruciating; most patients turn up at hospital groaning and retching with the pain. If you haven't already gone to hospital, it probably isn't torsion.

The most common cause of altered sensation in the testicles (and the most likely in your case IMO) is referred pain the lower back - pressure on your lumbar spine makes you feel like your balls are numb or painful. Unless you've slipped a disc, it should get better on its own.

An infection or an inguinal hernia might also explain your symptoms, but neither situation is a medical emergency. If your balls get worse then see your GP, but I'd wager that you'll be fine in a couple of days.

>>5775

>Testicular torsion rapidly becomes absolutely excruciating; most patients turn up at hospital groaning and retching with the pain. If you haven't already gone to hospital, it probably isn't torsion.


This is reassuring to know.

I occasionally get a bit of a dull ache in my left nut, but usually I think it's just a massive fart brewing and presumably causing that bit of your guts around the pelvic area to stretch things about in an uncomfortable way.

Probably the only reason I never noticed it earlier in life is that I was such a skinny fucker as a younglad.

>>5774
Gosh, that sounds terrifying. What if it gets caught? Maybe I shouldn't ask now, I feel a bit sick.

>>5775
Thought this was the case, I was expecting it to happen at any moment and coming to terms with the possibility of excruciating pain and possible impotence.

My posture is shite but this hasn't been a problem before, so maybe you're right and it's one more thing breaking down. Cheers! Got a GP apt this afternoon anyway.

They rang back at 11:30 with a 'courtesy call' to say that I wouldn't be called by a clinician tonight, didn't seem much need for it. Sensation persists but it's okay. No blood in the cum or owt, which I assume is a good sign.

>>5777
It's fine, give it a go. I sometimes tuck'em in when in bed, for no particular reason, just something to fiddle with.
(I read about it in a James Bond book when I was a weelad, it was in a bit about fighting, and it said something like 'that kick should have incapacitated him' - 'no, oriental fighters can hide their testicles inside themselves, so they can't be hurt', and I thought that sounded handy, so I had a rummage. Educational stuff, Fleming)

>>5778
>'no, oriental fighters can hide their testicles inside themselves, so they can't be hurt', and I thought that sounded handy, so I had a rummage. Educational stuff, Fleming)
I want to say that's a reference to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shi_Pei_Pu but I don't think the chronology makes sense.

>>5774
>>5777
>>5778
My left fella decides to go up into my torso quite often. The first time it happened to me was with a girl, and I posted on /emo/ that I was really worried there was something wrong with my meat and two veg, only to be laughed off the front page. In hindsight, it was just what I needed.

sage for using .gs as a diary.

>>5779 Just digging further - found this on 'pedia.
"Sir Hugo Drax, the antagonist of Moonraker, was named after Fleming's acquaintance Admiral Sir Reginald Aylmer Ranfurly Plunkett-Ernle-Erle-Drax;[96]"
That's a hell of a name. I shall call my cat that.
Sage4lackoftesticles.

>>5781
Ancestor of Richard Grosvenor Plunkett-Ernle-Erle-Drax, AKA Richard Drax, Tory MP.

I always thought a Tory MP sharing a name with a Bond villain was an amusing coincidence but to find out it's not a coincidence at all is utterly hilarious.

>>5774
>>5778
>>5779
>>5780
I cannot help but be absolutely certain this is all a bit of 'microwaves clean your iphone' banter, and that if I do it the first movement of my legs or hips will obliterate the little fellows and I'll be posting on here about it and you'll all be gobsmacked at my stupidity for not getting the joke.

I've booked an appointment with an older gentleman I found on the internet to feel them up after work tomorrow.

I think it's just some swelling/tightness in those...connective tissues on the side? Like if you grip a bit of the skin either side then there are those wiry muscly strings that seem to connect the base to the balls. It's there on the right hand side, so thankfully probably not anything serious.

Thanks lads, check your balls. Check your friends, too.

>>5784

Shoving your balls up your inguinal canals is called "tucking" and it's routinely used by transwomen and drag queens to hide their bits. It's perfectly safe, but somewhat uncomfortable if you're not used to it.

The stringy bits on your balls are a cluster of blood vessels and sperm ducts. If they're tender or sore, the most usual cause is a bacterial infection of the sperm ducts. It's often just a UTI, but if you've been recently sexually active you should get tested for chlamydia and gonorrhoea. In either case, it's easily treated with a short course of antibiotics.

Your GP will check you out for lumps and bumps, but I wouldn't worry yourself about nut cancer - the early symptoms are usually a painless hard lump on or in the bollock.

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/epididymitis/

>>5785
>transwomen and drag queens

You mean dragqueens.

>>5786

Dr. Christian has probably bankrupted himself and is now begging for donations.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/dr-christian-jessenarlene-foster

Let's say, hypothetically, that I was tempted to try the old testicle-conceal. Before I try anything, how would I get them out again?

>>5794
A nice hot bath and it'd pop out of its own accord.

>>5794
Don't, it's a ploy to pop them.

>>5794
Gravity and 10 seconds of not being poked in will do the job. Default position is out.

>>5797
Where's the guarantee that the movement of my pelvis won't result in any crushing?

>>5798
If bits of your pelvis are moving relative to others, you should probably get that seen to rather than fiddling with your balls.
Just tuck'em in. Or don't. You're wildly overthinking this. It's neither as risky or as satisfying as you seem to be imagining.
Surely, in this day & age, there are youtube guides.

Got a bug bite of some sort in the park yesterday, I crushed the fucker on contact (accidentally, it felt like a stray hair) and it looked tiny, saw a red dot where it had bitten me, thought nothing more of it. Now it's swollen and I can't even fit my hand around the area, it's covering the lower 180 degrees of my lower thigh and extends halfway down my calf, the red area is about 18 inches long now, it could be two separate bites, one below and one above my knee, but the area is contiguous.

I've had no nausea and the itching isn't overly frequent, but it's feeling super tight when I walk and quite uncomfortable.

Can anyone reassure me my leg won't fall off? I've never had a bite this big before and it's still growing in area 30 hours after the fact, I suspect maybe it's an allergic reaction from the time I had bedbugs a few years back.

Do you reckon it was a spider? I was just sitting in a fairly popular sitting area in the park, nothing more. Presumably if there were killer bugs on the loose then I'd have heard something by now.

>>5812

I'd personally be pretty alarmed if my leg was that swollen, to be honest. It does sound like an allergic reaction, but is certainly worth getting looked at in case it's an infection, or indeed, an exotic killer bug on the loose.

>>5813
The alarm is building, waiting for 111 to answer now. On the outer edges it resembles a rash, and it seems like the redness is radiating from two separate areas so I think that's why it's gotten so massive.

I've been number 2 in the queue for 10 minutes now, seems statistically unlikely.

I've demarcated the area in biro, as you can see it comes in at the knee to the tendon, but it's all red on the lower 90 degrees of my knee.

Getting a callback soon, if it falls off I'll let you lads see what it looks like. Assuming they let me keep it.

>>5812
You need to make sure it isn't a tick bite. If it is, they are fairly easily removed but you need to deal with it.

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/lyme-disease/

>>5812

Try some anti-histamines. If it gets worse, go to the walk-in centre.

>>5816
I inspected the bite location when leaving the area and was satisfied it wasn't a tick, as I've removed them from my pets before - unless I took the fucker out the second he burrowed in, and the remnants of his face are still in my leg, but there's no bullseye marking. That's been drilled into me by Scrubs. Lyme disease is one of those names that sounds trivial but turns out to be horrific. I've heard people develop potentially lethal allergies to red meat, for example. 'Fortunately' the redness is contiguous.

>>5817
Been looking all round the house for it, got nowt. Shops all closed. Will grab some tomorrow.

>>5815
You have quite feminine legs, m8. I can't stop thinking about them resting on my shoulders while I thrust into you with wild abandon. Is that medical advice? Perhaps.

Sent photos to a doctor and she said it was massive, she sounded genuinely incredulous on the phone until I'd sent some pics through. She said the rash was quite big as well, probably inflammatory reaction and should be fine with some antihistamines

>>5819
Thanks, I'm gorgeous. I also have long eyelashes and very fine eyebrows. I'd probably be a dream otter if I didn't find men physically repulsive.

I have piles.

>>5824

Eat more fibre, drink more water, get more exercise.

I cut my calories by around 1000 a day and have been doing up 40-60 minutes more intensive exercise five days a week. It's been a month and there's no appreciable difference to my weight. Is this not long enough to see a difference? Should I be exercising more? Is it possible I'm building muscle fast enough to replace lost fat resulting in no weight loss?

>>5835

How are you tracking your calories? It may be that you're off with your estimate of a 1000 calorie deficit. I'd recommend just focusing on switching out calorie dense foods for micronutrient dense foods for a week, and eat until you're completely full. If you track that, you can use that as a baseline for comfortable fullness, then the next week you can cut overall calories by 250 - 500.

What's "an appreciable difference"? Are you weighing yourself at a consistent time each day and under the same conditions? Hydration and food weight can sway your weight by over 1kg, easily.

Credit to you for sticking it out for a month, and I'm sure you've seen some positive changes (are you getting stronger or are you developing better endurance from the exercise?), but the problem with starting out on a big deficit and five days per week of training is it doesn't give you much room if you decide to cut down further. Believe me, you don't want to be living off less than 1300 calories a day and trying to do two-a-days, it's gruelling and unsustainable.

>>5836
>How are you tracking your calories?
I stopped drinking and I'm not eating any more than I did previously. Without alcohol I no longer have junk food cravings so that's gone too.
>What's "an appreciable difference"?
My weight so far is just fluctuating around the same figure. My scales are a bit fucked so it's hard to get a meaningful reading from them but it's around the same 81, 82 kg mark.

Physically I'm feeling better and my extremities are visibly more toned and gaining muscle. It's just the lack of change in the one definite metric that is weight.

>>5835

A kilo of body fat contains about 7700 calories. Moderately intense exercise burns 400-600 calories per hour.

It's possible that you're gaining significant amounts of muscle, but the more likely explanation is that you're under-estimating your calorie intake.

>>5838
That's a lot! I'll keep increasing the duration and intensity at a reasonable rate but try to be more conscious of portion size too.

>>5837
I recommend myFitnessPal as a way of recording your calories properly. You're probably undercounting your food.

>>5840
I'm happy to exercise more and be conscious about what I'm eating but using an actual calorie tracker and limiting myself to numbers means I'm going to spend half the day hungry, with low blood sugar and unable to sleep or function properly because of it.

>>5841
No, you don't have to do any of that. You just faithfully record a food diary in an application that has a database, like myFitnessPal - and then you actually get a proper reading on how many calories you are consuming and why your exercise perhaps isn't getting the results you want.

>>5842

It says I've eaten 501 calories today (1404 in, 903 burned exercising) so that's 999 under budget.

>>5843

>903 burned exercising

I would caution using those numbers, they will rarely be accurate.

>>5844
If it's less than +/- 1000 I think I'm probably doing okay.

>>5845

Agreed, just saying though.

This myfitnesspal thing is making me look at my nutrition/vitamin intake too and it's a bastard of a catch-22 trying to get the iron levels up. Seems like I have to either have basically no iron or far, far too much vitamin A.

>>5847
I think its particularly brilliant for that and the nutrient breakdowns it gives you - even when I was hitting the right number of calories per day, at one point my diet was almost entirely carbohydrate.

Its for this reason I think it's a really useful tool, even if you're not yet following a diet plan; I think it gives you very useful insight into what and how much, you're actually eating.

>>5848
I can see the appeal of following a diet plan out of sheer laziness in that it'll tell me what to eat instead of having to think about it.

>>5849
That's exactly why I find following a diet so easy.

>>5849
And yet you called me weird for eating Pizza Hut every day.

>>5851
Weirdo.

>>5851
Given the repetitive nature of my diet nowadays, you were years ahead of your time and I was wrong.

>>5848
It is a little like I predicted. Weekdays are fine because I'm burning a lot of calories so can eat a satisfying amount to balance it out but any rest day (for me, the weekend) I can only eat 1500 calories total so I'm actively hungry for hours including when I try to sleep.

>>5854

You might consider introducing more satiating but low calorie foods on your rest days. Don't overdo it or introduce it too quickly (mainly for the sake of your arsehole), but potatoes and other fibrous vegetables, or simply a fair whack of whole fruit, can really do a lot to make you feel full without getting a lot of calories.

I consider myself to have a really good appetite, but something as simple as a big orange can leave me feeling full for ages.

I've started drinking this guy's smoothie every day. He claims it's more or less "nutritionally complete". Is it good? Could it be made better? At the very least, I know I'm consistently ticking off at least a couple of my five a day where I wasn't before.

tl;dw it's spinach, kale, banana, strawberries, blueberries, flax seeds, chia seeds, milk. (He adds oats, peanut butter and protein powder too but I skip those, I probably get enough fat and protein from meat.)