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>> No. 9430 Anonymous
26th January 2016
Tuesday 10:09 pm
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Huddersfield charity shop finally says goodbye to a shutter which lasted 26 years


That's it. That's literally it. A charity shop has replaced one of its roller shutters after having the same one for 26 years. It's all go in Huddersfield.

I challenge you lads to find a more pointless news story than this.
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>> No. 18896 Anonymous
4th April 2019
Thursday 1:25 pm
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That's exactly what I just said, you useless tosser.
>> No. 18897 Anonymous
4th April 2019
Thursday 4:07 pm
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Mind those edges, lad.
>> No. 18898 Anonymous
4th April 2019
Thursday 6:08 pm
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I don't think you even know what the words you are using mean. There is nothing provocatively controversial about thinking you are a useless tosser.
>> No. 18899 Anonymous
4th April 2019
Thursday 6:56 pm
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Edgelord strikes again! No-one is safe from his rapier ripostes!
>> No. 18900 Anonymous
4th April 2019
Thursday 7:39 pm
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That post wasn't mine, but I too fail to see how calling someone a tosser is "edgy". Maybe if you did it in a church but I don't think anyone's gotten spiritual about .gs yet.
>> No. 18901 Anonymous
4th April 2019
Thursday 10:14 pm
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Agreed, this is just getting embarrassing.
>> No. 18905 Anonymous
6th April 2019
Saturday 11:18 pm
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>'Decent lad' stole hired £50,000 Aston Martin, crashed it on A46, then told lorry driver 'I am fucking off' before running away

>> No. 18906 Anonymous
6th April 2019
Saturday 11:44 pm
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I live in Gloucestershire and that's the sort of hilarious crime we get around here, always with a headline dripping with sarcasm. Things are often stupid but rarely malicious. Bloke even looks like a supermarket worker I know.
>> No. 18907 Anonymous
7th April 2019
Sunday 10:37 am
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>aggravated vehicle taking

Could there not be a better name for this? "Aggravated" sounds like there was fury or dissatisfaction involved. The act seems more... Cavalier.
>> No. 19076 Anonymous
18th April 2019
Thursday 7:54 am
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Coastguard release photo of object that sparked huge River Hull search for ‘body’

>> No. 19078 Anonymous
18th April 2019
Thursday 3:14 pm
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He looks like a cheeky chappy bet he did for a lark.
>> No. 19079 Anonymous
18th April 2019
Thursday 3:20 pm
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It looks like the BFG from the 80s animated film. My money is on some scallies taking him from a local scarecrow festival and throwing it in the river.
>> No. 19102 Anonymous
23rd April 2019
Tuesday 6:03 pm
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People who live next to an airport complain about aircraft.

>> No. 19104 Anonymous
23rd April 2019
Tuesday 7:22 pm
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Even better, people who willingly moved next to an airport complain about aircraft.
>> No. 19105 Anonymous
23rd April 2019
Tuesday 8:37 pm
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They're just ungrateful cunts. I would fucking love to live at the end of a runway like that.
>> No. 19106 Anonymous
23rd April 2019
Tuesday 9:42 pm
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I find the sound of passing trains and aircraft very relaxing. I could probably end up saving a packet when it comes to finding a house. Not sure about raising kids there though.

Any parents here who can chip in? How well do babies/infants get used to background noise?
>> No. 19107 Anonymous
23rd April 2019
Tuesday 10:54 pm
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I posit that an A320 within 100m of your back garden is more than just background noise.
>> No. 19109 Anonymous
23rd April 2019
Tuesday 11:40 pm
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This is fair. If you worked at the airport, you'd be obliged to wear full ear defenders that close to a spun up plane, let alone one under taxi power. It's hard to get across just how loud that is - at 50m even an idle load would cause hearing damage within minutes, so I'd expect if you sat in your garden all day 100m or so away, or even just had your windows open while planes are held idling there constantly you'd be exposed to hearing damage for sure. It's very much the equivalent of having someone working with a jackhammer two doors down, it's that level of noise and vibration.

I get that they made the choice to move next to an airport, but it seems when they did move there, they were next to a dead taxiway. There certainly should have been information available to them about the plans or potential for that taxiway to become live again in the future - my grandparents live within sight of the local airport and they get CONSTANT updates via letter about the plans to extend the runway there, and that's been floated about for ten years. Typically the local council owns an airport at least partially, so there's no excuse IMO. From my experience you do get used to background plane noise, but they look like they live much, much closer to a live taxiway than anyone would be reasonably expected to be comfortable with. I'd be interested to know when that house was built - I'm guessing during the time that area of the airport went unused, because there's definitely supposed to be regulations on this sort of thing.
>> No. 19111 Anonymous
24th April 2019
Wednesday 5:42 pm
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Well, granted. I'd need to know exactly how close is 'close', considering all noise drops off in an inverse-square relationship. 100m would rather be taking the piss.

Does anyone know off the top of their head what the minimum Euclidean distance commercial planes legally have to be from a private residence?
>> No. 19112 Anonymous
25th April 2019
Thursday 1:59 am
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I'm not sure it's ever measured by distance, more dB levels. I reckon there's probably more security considerations than comfort ones when it comes to houses overlooking airfields, you could quite easily ground a plane with a cricket ball and a good arm from your second floor window if you lived that close to an airport.
>> No. 19117 Anonymous
25th April 2019
Thursday 10:13 pm
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>I would fucking love to live at the end of a runway like that

It could get a little too close for comfort.

>> No. 19118 Anonymous
26th April 2019
Friday 7:06 pm
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This just reminds me of the gag in Man to Man with Dean Learner, about Merriman Weir having recorded his album at home while he was living right next to a motorway.

"You can hear a major accident on the B side. One track is just honking"

"And has the remastering process removed that at all?"

"Nah, if anything it's louder."
>> No. 19119 Anonymous
26th April 2019
Friday 7:34 pm
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It's mental that this exists and they haven't put up a jet barrier.
>> No. 19120 Anonymous
26th April 2019
Friday 9:45 pm
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Fucking YouTube video stabilisation ruins it.
>> No. 19121 Anonymous
26th April 2019
Friday 11:28 pm
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YouTube stabilisation is literally the worst thing in the world.
>> No. 19153 Anonymous
1st May 2019
Wednesday 11:56 am
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This whole thing stinks to high heaven, but I can't find the smoking gun to help explain why.
>> No. 19154 Anonymous
1st May 2019
Wednesday 1:05 pm
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It seems odd that someone would record the assault and damage they were causing, even if they felt it was justified. The second fly tipper seems remarkably casual about the fact his mate is getting wrestled and a fence post swung at him, too.
>> No. 19159 Anonymous
1st May 2019
Wednesday 3:59 pm
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Yeah, there's also no original source on the clip, which apparently happened in Essex at midnight yesterday, and there isn't much noise to be heard from a tractor slamming into a transit van, indeed no one seemed to notice the tractor at all. All I could do was check the weather in Essex at that time to see if it was raining like in the video, and as far as I can tell it wasn't, but it was foggy with 98% humidity, which might cause rain-like conditions I suppose.
>> No. 19207 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 12:08 am
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> SCARLETT Moffatt and her mam Betty have donated two 'tickets of the century' for a Spice Girls concert to be raffled off for charity.

>The TV personalities have given away a pair of tickets to see the 1990s British pop megastars at Sunderland's Stadium of Light on Thursday, June 6.

It kind of still seems a bit of a stretch to me to call Scarlett Moffatt a "TV personality". TV something, yes. But personality? And her mum - what has she ever done besides sit on the livingroom sofa on Gogglebox, mainly because it was her daughter's springboard to an also-ran TV presenter career?

I know I am being a slightly unfair cunt about Scarlett, but I just never really understood how somebody with modest talent like her got to be on national television.
>> No. 19208 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 12:23 am
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>just never really understood how somebody with modest talent like her got to be on national television.
I think the problem here is that you see "being on the telly" as something prestigious, as opposed to anything that actually matters.
>> No. 19211 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 1:20 am
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>I think the problem here is that you see "being on the telly" as something prestigious

You mean Ibiza Weekender isn't prestigious?

What's the name of the fat poof again who acts as the host on Weekender?
>> No. 19214 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 10:53 am
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A decent agent really helps. She'll be good at her job too, which is actually quite important to TV people, because a dingbat who mucks up every shoot they're on isn't worth the hassle, unless you're maybe Russle Brand for that couple of years a decade ago, and she's inoffensive but not in a Matt Baker way, except for that one time he wasn't when we all thought he might kill David Cameron live on television. Scarlett Moffatt also has two-million Insta follwers and a further 660K on Twitter, overlap notwithstanding, so half your press is done for your show right there. Richard Madden only has two-hundred-thousand more Instagram followers and he was one of the most famous, and fuckable, GoT characters and was in last year's Bodyguard, a TV show so popular the director-general of the Beeb probably had to take anti-depressants just to make his erection go down. The kind of shows Moffat appears on don't have nearly those programme's costs, so the ratio of free-press to budget is likely far higher for Moffat. I never saw the Streetmate reboot, but the one with Divina McCall from before 9/11 happened looked like it cost however much the sandwich order for the cast (of one) and crew (of maybe four) was.

Anyway, the point is she has broad appeal, just not to greasy internet weirdos like you and I, and her background doing normal jobs like working in Asda probably helps because she's unlikely to be a delusional fame-monster who thinks they're too special to replace. She recently made back-to-back Tweets that would appear to support this pair of conclusions too.

Thank you for reading my short essay on why Scarlett Moffatt is richer than a Texas oil baron, and became so in a window of time shorter than most people spend at university.
>> No. 19216 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 1:32 pm
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Admit it, you just want to bonk her.
>> No. 19217 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 1:51 pm
19217 Woman's surprise at Kingsmill loaf full of bread crusts
A confused "crust-omer" opened a loaf of bread only to find the bag was full of crusts.

Timea Ganji was hoping to make sandwiches for her children's lunch when she made the unlikely discovery.

"It's not funny first thing in the morning, when you have half an hour to get the kids to school and there's no time to get another loaf," she said.
>> No. 19218 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 3:05 pm
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I have a far darker desire which is to analyse and discuss the most mundane aspects for TV media inspite of no one else caring.
>> No. 19219 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 4:07 pm
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You deviant.
>> No. 19220 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 4:20 pm
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I feel her pane.
>> No. 19226 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 6:31 pm
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What? What's that a pun on?
>> No. 19227 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 6:34 pm
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I think you might have missed the spoon.
>> No. 19238 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 8:18 pm
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Pane is italian for bread (or a type of bread? I don't care), and if this place wasn't full of fucking italians, we might have got the French word for bread which is literally "Pain", but no.
>> No. 19241 Anonymous
11th May 2019
Saturday 10:14 pm
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I'm reminded of when we had French exchange students during secondary school. One of them wondered why there was a band called House of Bread, apparently frog DJs on the radio were translating House of Pain to Maison de Pain. This being when Jump Around was a huge hit and being played all the time.
>> No. 19270 Anonymous
13th May 2019
Monday 3:35 pm
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Screenshot_2019-05-13 UK Home Daily Mail Online.png
Think I've got you beat, OP.
>> No. 19271 Anonymous
13th May 2019
Monday 3:55 pm
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It's ridiculous - the other most ridiculous genre of story which appears with alarming regularity is "person buys clothes off internet site which don't fit". WTAF have we become.
>> No. 19274 Anonymous
13th May 2019
Monday 8:45 pm
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https://scripps.ucsd.edu/programs/keelingcurve/ CO2 in atmosphere ppm is now higher than it ever has been in the entire time the human race has existed, approaching levels that impair human cognition and rising.
>> No. 19275 Anonymous
13th May 2019
Monday 8:55 pm
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Are there any charity shop shutters or train station cats to make me care about this story?
>> No. 19276 Anonymous
13th May 2019
Monday 8:57 pm
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I think you've misunderstood what this thread is about, newlad, or you're a misguided tree excited about how big you'll grow on all this new CO2.
>> No. 19277 Anonymous
13th May 2019
Monday 9:23 pm
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This is a thread about news items nobody cares about. See >>19275
>> No. 19278 Anonymous
13th May 2019
Monday 9:39 pm
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>> No. 19280 Anonymous
13th May 2019
Monday 11:30 pm
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>This is a thread about news items nobody cares about

Well then he was at least half right in posting it in this thread.
>> No. 19316 Anonymous
16th May 2019
Thursday 7:03 pm
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>An air ambulance charity has distanced itself from a Cambodian bar that used its helicopter in an advert for "all beautiful girls".

>A picture of the East Anglian Air Ambulance was used to advertise the venue which offers a time-defying 24-hour happy hour.


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