Good luck lads.

Greetings from sunny Sheffield.

It's a nice cool 26 degrees indoors at 8am, I got Mylar covering all the windows, freezer full of ice, fridge full of water, freshly shaved head, lets get it over with already.

>>452574
My girlfriend shut all of the windows overnight because she was paranoid that we wouldn't be up in time to close them when it went from being cooler outside than inside to being warmer outside. The end result is that the house is very stuffy and it's still cooler outside.

>>452575

Open windows. Closed Curtains. Is the optimal configuration for this weather.

Propping open your bedroom door with a fan and running it overnight will provide some relief.

Soaking in a cool bath (<37c) before bed will help lower your core body temperature and make sleep easier

Get plenty of fluids, but make sure you're replacing salts (lucozade sport is pretty good for this)

Wear a hat and high factor sunscreen. I wear factor 50 despite the label trying to shame me by saying the sunscreen is for 'infants and babies'

Better to stay out of the sun altogether lest you burst into flames.

I'm from the very top of Scotland and survived 4 years in Asia.

>>452578
Thanks, lad. She's not keen on fans either because she thinks they're too loud and "all they do is blow hot air around" but she's fucked off to work so I can get some peace.

I'm in a three storey house, with windows facing to the North-West and South-East, and I have a grand total of five fans at my disposal. How should I most effectively circulate air around the building? I'm guessing I should have fans pointing outside on the top floor North-West windows and pointing inside on the South-East ones downstairs, but I'm not a scientist.

>>452579

Put some bottles of water in the freezer and then leave them in your room round about the time you go to sleep.

And avoid Peterborough at all costs. It seems to be the epicenter of Sunmageddon

Keep a spray bottle of water in the fridge and spritz yer nekkid body as necessary. Artificial sweat, saves on fluids and electrolytes innit.

Not sure what all the fuss is about. I'm feeling quite cool. Got a Vimpto ice pop just in case.

Just bought a 10 pack of Stella, home alone for a couple of days as girlfriend is housesitting for her parents, 2fans keeping me cool. Gonna wank and play mediocre games non-stop for 3 days.

>>452571

For its time, the special effects in Terminator 2 were nothing short of groundbreaking. But when you look at the nuclear blast scene now, it hasn't aged well. A similar scene at the beginning of Terminator 3 holds up far better after nearly 20 years.

I sort of want to play a video game, but I reckon if my GPU gets hot enough for the fans to rotate even slightly the entire room will turn into a sauna. Also, I had a look and my CPU is currently the same temperature as London will be tomorrow evening, which probably means I need to play around with my fan curves.

>>452593

This is why I did fuck all other than drink and sleep over the weekend. Even having the computer on would have put my room in the 40s, and turning on my amp to play guitar would have been a deathwish because I thought it was a good idea to get rid of my solid state amps in favour of valve amps that act like a space heater at the best of times.

There's nothing for it lads. Just lie there and accept your fate. Maybe if you have any retro consoles about you can just about manage, a PS1 or whatever never really gave off any heat as I remember.

>>452594

I'm bewildered at your problem. Either you live in a tiny bedsit or you are running a supercomputer at your house. I've got a fairly recent desktop PC, not a fully specced out gaming behemoth but well capable, and I haven't noticed it having any kind of effect on the temperature in that room.

This heat feels very different to the weekend, it's like I'm wet as well. Just looked at the weather and things won't drop until 8pm and even then marginally, not sure I should risk walking to the shop.

>>452596
The heat is supposed to build gradually until the highest point around 4pm

After that it'll drop slowly until 6am, then the same thing repeats tomorrow.

Tomorrow will be more "extreme", so a slightly hotter peak at 4pm, but it'll drop faster afterwards, being cooler by that midnight than the coolest point of the night before.

>>452592
I don't think I've watched any of the Terminator films, apart from the first two proper ones, all the way through. I have little desire to change that.

I've just let the cat out because she wouldn't stop whining at the door, not sure how long I should leave it before getting her back in.

I'm feeling too hot to do anything, so I'm mainly just playing Football Manager while waiting to see if any important calls or emails come in.

>>452598
3 is entirely decent enough.
Salavation is duff. Genesis was an attempt to reboot the series and was shit. Dark fate tells you to ignore everything after T2 and accept it as the official T3.

>>452596
It really does - the air is a lot "thicker".

Not going to be a great nights sleep at this rate.

>>452599

They should've stopped after T3. It was good enough to be the end point of the franchise, because, guess what, they didn't manage to prevent Judgement Day after all. End of the story. Case closed. Even with all its references to future events, there was no real need to do yet another sequel to follow up on those loose ends.

It was a bit of a disappointment back then that Linda Hamilton wasn't on board, because Terminator without her made about as much sense as Alien without Sigourney Weaver. Good thing though that she wasn't recast. That probably would have ended up being an even bigger disappointment.

Kristanna Loken as the T-X was a strong female part, which was an obvious and thankfully not entirely unsuccessful attempt to offset that drawback, but it just didn't feel the same. And bringing Linda Hamilton back only for Dark Fate was too little, too late.

>>452599
I remember almost nothing of Terminator 3 up until the last 20 minutes or so, at which point it became my absolute favourite one. A lot of it was probably rubbish, but the closing scenes were fantastic.

>>452602>>452601
This, the being unable to actually stop, only postpone events twist was great. I wonder if Arnie looks back and figures they should have stopped there too.

Salvation isn't too bad a film if you treat it as an entirely separate entity.

>>452602
I remember when the lady robot makes her tits big when a cop pulls her over.

Private dentistry is absolutely sick. I went to the dentist today to get my filling replaced, furious that it would cost £300. The place I went to has three different TVs, all on different channels, all with the sound off and with music playing as well. I sat in the dentist's chair, watching one TV, then he tipped me back to look in my mouth, and there was another TV on the ceiling for me to watch. It was adverts, so I didn't actually enjoy it, but it's wild all the same.

You need to get a check-up before the dentist does anything; that costs £60. He dictated every single detail about what's wrong with every single one of my teeth to his assistant, but he thankfully spared me the fearmongering sales pitch about how most of my teeth are on the verge of crumbling to dust. And replacing the filling was actually only £130, so much cheaper than I had been expecting. I thought the whole procedure would take 2-3 hours, but my appointment was 1120 and I was out of there before noon. I even asked him, while I was there, if he could also file down my massively chipped tooth so I wouldn't keep slicing my tongue open on it. He did that for an additional £35 and it took all of three minutes. What a king. No wonder rich people always have such lovely teeth.

>>452605

Interesting, and you don't remember that she was all nekkid just moments before?

Just saw a double decker bus plastered in adverts for Pratt & Whitney's F35 engine. You've gone too far this time, military industrial complex.

>>452606
>Private dentistry is absolutely sick

Agreed on this. The last time I used NHS (back when that existed) the dentist even left a filling flush which picked up plaque and was impossible to clean, never again I said.

I feel truly sorry for people getting older who can't afford private and effectively never get a cleaning by a hygienist.

>And replacing the filling was actually only £130

He's pulling your pants down, I hardly go to a cheap one and yet a filling still only costs me £75. Although mine is definitely keen on the upsell for better or worse.

>>452605
I mean, you would if you could.

I take back what I said, MEACO fans are absolute shite. It's the power supply that mostly lets them down - a cheap and flimsy USB connection, added to this is that my fan just died on me from what I suspect is overheating.

This is outrageous, I have no fan.

>>452608
It's Farnborough this week. Feel free to wide up ecolad with all the new announcements.
https://www.reuters.com/business/aerospace-defense/rolls-royce-start-ultrafan-prototype-tests-this-year-2022-07-17/

>>452611
You leave ecolad alone, you bloody carpet-bagger.

>>452611

There are layers to the irony here.

>>452611
My cheapo fan I got from Homebase years ago is keeping me nice and cool.

Does anybody else get ruined guts when it's hot like this? I've been having awful sloppy shits all day as though I've eaten a load of chillis or something.

Hmm.

>>452595

Your computer must be either broken or from the future, then. Most processors idle at about 40 degrees before you even start doing anything with them, and as soon as you start playing games, even the most efficient GPUs run in the high 60s. That heat has to go somewhere.

And you've no idea how hot a quad of EL34s get. You could toast bread over an old Marshall.

Anyway I'm not sure why you find any of this bewildering, it's well known that British homes are typically quite compact, shall we say, and designed for keeping heat in. It's going to be noticeable, especially if we're talking about a little spare bedroom like most sensible people would establish their gaming and music producing man-cave in.

>>452616

And there'll be people who'll still vote for Boris Johnson, what else is new?

>>452616
I'm really concerned how many idiots are going to do themselves serious harm by trying to "stiff upper lip" their way through this kind of heat. There's definitely going to be a lot of people who've turned an alarming shade of red come Wednesday. She's also missing 2018 from her chart of Hell.

Can't wait for this shite to be over.

>>452617
I bet it's that sod who crowed about having his PC in a seperate room to his actual office like it was the most normal thing in the world.

>>452619
>She's also missing 2018 from her chart
It's missing a lot of things.

>>452614
I tried ordering from Argos online and when I got the confirmation email they gave me a store collection date of tomorrow. So I cancelled and walked down to risk it and managed to find a standing fan that I've now got on my desk. A cheeky young woman tried cutting in front of me in the line and was shocked at then being told to go to the back like everyone else.

Treasure your fan. Someone on here will try and shill you a MEACO fan but you can tell them to jog right on.

>>452615
My skin has decided to have an acne flair up to remind me of what it was like to be a young man again.

>>452616
In fairness it will rain on Wednesday over here. And Friday as well. Hopefully that will be it for summer and we can return to our sensible jumpers.

>>452619 I bet it's that sod who crowed about having his PC in a seperate room to his actual office like it was the most normal thing in the world.

Nope, that's me, and I still do it. It's not 'noral, in that most people don't do it, but it's a fine engineering solution to an annoying problem. My office is tolerable, without air-con.

Just realised I could soak my sports top and wear that like a shitty stillsuit or something. It's baggy enough that I'm only slightly repulsed by how it clings to my vile body.

>>452619

In fairness I've always thought that's a pretty respectable idea if the layout of your home will accommodate it. I used to live in a studio flat and had my PC at a desk just behind the partition wall for the bedroom, so all it took was a HDMI cable and a USB extension going round the bottom of the door frame. That meant I could game in the living room on The Big Telly without any fan noise or extra heat.

You know I miss that place. There's something to be said for living in a compact space with just what you need, everything practically at arm's reach, and no excess. The only annoying bit was being able to hear the fridge buzz all the time. Having more space never really gives you more space, you just find ways of filling it up, I've noticed. Or at least, your missus does

>>452623
On Saturday I put my pyjamas on straight from the washing line whilst they were still ever so slightly damp. It was heavenly.

I don't think today has felt that hot. I'm sure I was more mafted last weekend.

>>452622
>>452624
Look, I'm not judging you, I'm just upset I can't do it, which is why I'm bringing it up probably two years after the event.

Maybe your girlfriend could put your PC in a mason jar or something. I don't have that luxury either!

>>452625
It definitely feels unusal to me. There's something about how long it's going to be this hot too, all day practically. I might soak my other sports top and then put it in the fridge for a bit, but the shock might just kill me.

>>452617

>Most processors idle at about 40 degrees before you even start doing anything with them

>That heat has to go somewhere.


Yes, but that doesn't mean they heat your room to 40 degrees in that state. My laptop's CPU is at 67°C at the moment with a few background applications running. That temperature may be considerable, and I can certainly feel the heat from my laptop on my legs right now, but the total amount of heat energy it gives off is really not that much. The same way you can't heat your room with a cigarette lighter, despite it burning at temperatures of up to 1900°C.

A top of the range desktop gaming PC will probably give off no more than 150 watts of pure heat energy even when you put it through its paces, according to https://smallbusiness.chron.com/average-heat-output-computer-69494.html .

Most electrical home heaters in the UK are rated for 10A at 230V, which works out to almost 2300 watts of heat energy (it's a little known fact that electric space heaters are among the most energy efficient home devices, as nearly 100 percent of the power they draw gets used for its intended purpose; even the heat from any circuit boards inside it is given off into the ambient air, and the mechanical energy that spins the heater's fans turns into heat via air friction).

So when you've got your PC running, you've got about 6.5 percent of the heat output of a space heater on full blast. I'm not saying it isn't going to contribute to your room temperature at all, but it's not as much as you would think.

At 300 kelvin, which is just over 27°C, the specific heat capacity of ambient air at sea level like in your bedroom is around 1 J/g*K. Meaning, to heat one gram of air by one kelvin, you need one joule.

150 watts heat output means by definition that your PC gives off 150 joules of heat per second. At sea level, the density of air is roughly 1.222 kilograms per cubic metre. Let's say you've got a slightly above average sized bedroom of about 15 square metres or 160 square feet. Standard ceiling height in residential properties in the UK is 2.40 m according to Google. That works out to around 360 cubic metres of air in your bedroom, which weighs 440 kilograms or 440,000 grams. If we plug that into our heat capacity of ambient air of 1 J/g*K, then you need 440 kilojoules to heat your room by one kelvin or degree celsius. If you divide 440,000 by your 150 watts or joules per second, it turns out that it takes your computer, again running on full blast, 48 minutes and 52 seconds to raise your room temperature by one degree.

This is a ceteris paribus model, i.e. we assume that all other factors of your bedroom temperature remain constant. If we introduce variables like heat loss through an open window, increased by the air flow of a running fan, or if your room is a bigger size, then the effect can be considerably less.

They've wrapped Hammersmith Bridge in foil to make sure it cooks evenly. Very sensible. I hope they've padded it with plenty of baking potatoes.

>>452623
I've put my underpants, t-shirt and socks in the freezer for tomorrow. It won't work for long but the thought of putting on some frosty knickers to the theme song from Touch Frost is enough for me.

Do any of you recognise this bloke? He has a cameo in the new Resident Evil series (it's not very good). I want to say he's Rod Hull but I'm sure that's wrong. The IMDb listing for his character is given as an African American guy and while the CGI might be that good, the accent's clearly British.

My eBay air conditioner is certainly doing the job of cooling me, though it seems to have no hope of actually chilling the entire room.

I eagerly await my electric bill.

>>452627

Your source unfortunately gives an extremely conservative figure for the power consumption of a high-end PC. Mine draws over 500w from the wall under load. A properly top-spec gaming rig (3090, 12900k) with a decent overclock could easily draw 800w.

>>452629
That's actually not a bad show to watch in this heat. The colour palette's refreshingly grey and cold.

>>452628
Sensible, elsewhere the train tracks caught fire. Should've wrapped those as well.
https://www.ndtv.com/world-news/london-3148365

>>452632
is it a split unit or one that dumps hot air out a window?
Either way, try to make the room air-tight, but if it's the latter, make cardboard constructions to block up any window gaps, and wrap the outlet hose in as much bubble wrap as you can. Those units are borderline shite, you have to give them all the help you can.

>>452627

So you've gone to all that effort to prove otherlad right, in that playing videogames for just shy of three and a bit hours would push a room at 36 degrees (the temperature it's been over most of the country today), over the 40 degree mark. You're also "assuming a larger than average bedroom", so for anybody with the average (or in other words, MOST COMMON) or smaller bedroom, it'll be even faster.

Most of us didn't need you to do the maths, because we already know the heat from a gaming PC can and does have an appreciable effect on the temperature of a room. When me and my ex had our gaming setup (we both had gaming PCs) in our spare room we didn't even need to put the heating on in winter, in fact we sometimes still had to open the window, right through December and January.

>>452637
>When me and my ex had our gaming setup (we both had gaming PCs) in our spare room we didn't even need to put the heating on in winter, in fact we sometimes still had to open the window, right through December and January.

You lads really do the weirdest flexes.

>>452636

It's the latter. I wanted a split unit, but couldn't bear the thought of having to install something in this weather.

I already knew these units are a bit shite, I watched a Technology Connections video about it - but it does exactly what I need it to, which is blow 16 degree C air directly at my naked body as I lie in bed. The hose coming out the back is definitely radiating heat out and must be cancelling out any effort to cool the whole room, but for £150 I can't say I'm too fussed. It also doubles as a dehumidifier so that will be useful in the garage in autumn.

I reckon if I really could be bothered I could plumb the vent out into the wall and out the house that way, making it massively more efficient. But at that point I might as well just get a split unit.

>>452630
Reminds me of James Cromwell.

>>452639
Fair enough - but I'd still recommend wrapping that hose. Even a couple of towels will significantly (mathslad will be along in a moment) reduce the heat being dumped back into your room.
I don't suppose you've got an unused chimney / fireplace you could dump it into? Easier than trying to seal all those annoying triangles of an open window.

>>452641

Just put it in a separate room, easy.

I think I can hear fireworks.

It's still fucking roasting.

Went out for some cheese. It's weird feeling the air still be hot, not just warm, but hot, at half-past-ten. I wish I were Glaswegian.

How the fuck do so many people keep their windows open at night? I do it and my room's infested with spiders, moths and flies within the hour. I might as well just sleep outside for fucks sake.

>>452647
Mesh fabric and velcro tape around the windows m9.

>>452647

I vape so aggressively that the air inside my house is incompatible with invertebrate life. I'm basically a crop duster that smells of summer fruits.

>>452630
Rod Hull is dead. Rene Auberjonois is also dead, and that's who I thought it was. James Cromwell, however, is still alive, but American.

It's been hot, sure, but people were saying we'd smash the records and go above 40 degrees on Monday. I assumed we would, since suburban Manchester got to an effortless 36, but the country as a whole barely went past 38 in the hottest place. It will be hotter tomorrow. Much hotter.

Honestly, I actually really like it; there's not much humidity so it's all pretty survivable. The only problem is that I work in a datacentre which, as it turns out, promises everyone we'll keep all their servers cool and fresh, but struggles to do that if the outside temperature goes above 32. We had some problems today/on Monday. It might be comfy out there, and refreshingly novel, but there's every possibility I won't have a job by Wednesday, and that's not so good.

I thought thousands were supposed to die?

>>452652
Remember the early covid death predictions? It's the boy who cried wolf all over again.

>>452652
How do you think people die in extreme heat? It's primarily elderly people being overwhelmed by the heat, but you were expecting something more like the climax of Scanners? It's not everyone else's fault you're daft, stop trying to make it our problem.

>>452653
https://www.cam.ac.uk/research/news/how-accurate-were-early-expert-predictions-on-covid-19-and-how-did-they-compare-to-the-public
Ah, fuck, would you look at that?

>>452650

He's the barman at a pub that was introduced with loud rock music, I wondered if he was an old rock star of some sort.

>>452654
That study is saying that less than half of expert predictions were within their own confidence ranges. Whether they were more accurate than predictions from the general public is irrelevant.

What matters is the actual modelling by the likes of Imperial College London which influenced government decision making.

>It is only a fortnight since Ferguson told the BBC that it was “almost inevitable” that daily infection rates would hit a record 100,000 and could peak at more than 200,000 after restrictions were relaxed. In fact daily cases have barely topped 30,000. The professor admits his prediction was “off” and blames the football for messing up his modelling. As people congregated in pubs and homes to watch the Euro 2020 matches, “we had an artificially inflated level of contact during that period and then suddenly it dropped off”.

https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/professor-neil-ferguson-interview-yes-my-prediction-was-off-well-learn-to-live-with-covid-k996nh3gm

The official modelling was way off. That's all there is to it, no need to try and move the goalposts.

>>452656
I guess the government should have given even less of a shit then. Maybe waited until July to lockdown.

Can't really be arsed relitigating this.

>>452657
Lad. Don't be one of those people.

The official covid modelling was way off. That shouldn't be a controversial statement to make. It doesn't necessitate having a discussion about lockdowns or whatever other bollocks you want to bring up.

There is this thing called nuance. You do not have to view everything in black and white. It is very important to be able to understand the flaws and mistakes on the 'side' you support, rather than having blind and unwavering devotion where you automatically assume anyone who is able to point out those issues is the other and must be attacked. Nothing is infallible.

>>452656
A model and a prediction are very different things. A lot of models were presented throughout COVID with very poor communication of what they were supposed to show.

As much as I like Chris Whitty, some of the PowerPoint slides from those TV briefings were atrocious.

The council sent out messages to put the bin out last night because they'd be collecting it very early in the morning to avoid the worst of the heat. They've actually done it much later than usual.

So like. Why is it actually this hot? What's actually causing it? I mean specifically right now, not just the long term trend of climate change.

Because I've never really actually thought about it, but howcome it's this hot right now, but other times when it's really sunny it's not this hot? Are we getting a big warm draft from the Sahara or something? Is it because it hasn't rained in a while? What's going on?

>>452661
I think I heard it was hot air from the Sahara and something called the Azores, which is like a hot Gulf Stream or something.

>>452661
Azores High is playing silly buggers.

>>452661
They said on the weather there's something called a heat dome, I think. Normally, hot air would gradually dissipate, but it isn't this time because of the heat dome holding the hot air in place.

>>452663

Causing thunder and lightning too, the cunt.

The Forde Report came out and everyone's saying it confirms what they personally believed all along.

I've just had to venture outside for a bit. With the hot wind and the heat bouncing back off the ground it felt like being near a furnace. I can't remember it being intolerable like this when I've been to Florida in the summer.

Tomorrow will be 24c and I'm hard wired to think that is hot.
I can't wait to be freezing tomorrow, shame the house will take a few days to cool down.

Social media zingers at it again.

>>452668
Open your windows overnight and in the morning so the hot air leaves.

>>452669

Some Americans got slightly offended the other day when I said we're all sweating like a whore in church at the moment. I guess it's not a saying you use in light conversation over there.

fuck me it's toasty lads
i'm having to keep my main machine off because it just gets too hot

My top floor flat is currently unlivable, and aside from being uncomfortable this is fucking strange. I never thought I could experience that oven like temperature in this country. It feels surreal. Like watching snow in august or something.

A moment of thought for those affected by Dave's syndrome in these troubling times.

>>452670
The one that tends to go down well here is "sweating like a black man on a rape charge."

Facebook Memories informs me that it is exactly one year to the day since I posted that I live in a ground-floor flat, and that single ladies should take note of how relatively comfortable my bed will be to sleep in despite the hot weather. It didn't work then, but it's hotter now. Perhaps I should try again.

>>452675

Repost the "memory" with a cheeky "offer's still open", that way it'll seem like good humour and ironic self awareness within the current situation, if nothing else.

Offered to help someone move a load of hay in the most transparently "I don't actually want to help" way possible earlier. It felt amazing. At the last possible second to offer, as they spoke on the phone with someone else I go: "You won't need anymore help with that, will you?" and I was already walking away. Like a Jedi mind trick. I can see why some people just love being bastards, what a rush.

>>452677

It's amazing what people will let you get away with when you are blunt, the only issue is when you run up against another arsehole, especially one with more experience than you. Then you either have to fight or fuck.

>>452678

Why not both?

the wind... it comes..... sweet relief.

Why does it still feel unbearably hot? Or am I drinking too much?

>>452681

Because it still is.

That and your house/flat/whatever has been heating up over the course of three days, but because our homes are designed to keep heat in, it'll take a long time to dissipate.

Just keep having cool showers, and switch to something more appropriate like Corona or Desperados, instead of John Smith's.

Slept like shit again. I am such a sweaty bastard right now.

>>452571


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Q-U2THOF00

Thank fuck that's over. A week or two of that wouldn't be funny.

>>452685
Thermostat says it's still 31° in the house. It can't be much over 20° outside.

>>452686
Climate change is a conspiracy by housebuilders to turn the people against decent home insulation. Then they can save money when building their new-build houses, and the heating companies are in on it. Don't let them get you.

>>452687

Decent insulation also keeps heat out in the summer.

I think this post was made by a purveyor of air conditioning units.

Wait, are we supposed to be getting mad at Big Heat or Big Chill here?

>>452689

Too hot in the summer, too cold in the winter? This has Big Conservatory all over it.

#occupysafestyleuk

>>452689
Personally, I blame Big House, ironically because of their small houses.

>>452690
They can bog off with their BOGOF.

Just heard that Geoff and Vicki have split up.

>>452693
That's so sad. I hope these people who I think might be your personal friends are okay given the circumstances.

>>452693

Listen I'm not bothered about e-celeb drama unless someone finds out what happened with Midwinter Minis and his bird.

>>452695

Do your own e-stalking m8, I'm off to the Bow Street Police Museum.

>>452692
I'm not saying he was some sort of hero keeping the forces of evil at bay, but the world quickly went to shit when they got rid of the Safestyle UK man.

>>452697
Didn't he get jailed for some sort of scam?

>>452698
£53,000 tax evasion.

https://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/you-buy-one-you-one-11865901

>>452698
He didn't declare his income for several years, coming to about £350k in total, so he was given the choice of paying up for going to prison for a year.

Chris and Sharla are shagging. I knew it.

>>452701
She can do better. I am older, fatter, balder and poorer than he is, but at least my YouTube channel never sold out nor turned into an endless string of shill videos about eating pretentious Japanese soups. Plus, I am a proper weeaboo who actually likes anime.

>>45270
>>452701
To be honest, I feel a bit bad for him, seems he gets a lot of shit for his weight. He's not *that* fat, and seems otherwise like a handsome bloke. I think he'd look good if he hit the gym a bit.

I'm curious where his youtube career is going to go though, surely you can't just put out this clickbait shite forever.

>>452703

That's why the quality always inevitably declines, and eventually becomes reaction videos and other such shit. Eventually you run out of things to really talk about in your specific niche, but you can generate endless "content" just regurgitating other stuff in an endless feedback loop.

>>452703

I wondered what his plan was with this new set, he must have spent shitloads on it, but to what end? I don't need a fake ramen shop setting to watch him tell me the top eight differences between manners in the UK and Japan for the fifth time.

A podcast like trash taste seems like the obvious route.

>>452703
I blame Tokyo Creative. They're a whole corporation of content-generating YouTubers. He signed up with them, they pay him a wage I assume, and he needs to make the sort of videos that pay them back. There are dozens of other YouTubers also associated with Tokyo Creative (including Sharla), and they all just work on an assembly line now. Chris doesn't mind, because he likes eating Wagyu beef in expensive restaurants and he's happy to make videos about doing so, but I'd much rather see him swear and emulate Stewart Lee like he used to.

Caring about the private lives of YouTubers? You fucking sad acts.

>>452704
Aaron Crascal is essentially all reaction vids now. He can't pull off hijinks because everyone knows who he is and his missus didn't want to deal with it anymore.

>>452708
You don't actually believe that's the reason he's started phoning it in, do you?

>>452709
Probably he's made his money and can't be arsed anymore. Looking forward to when Ladbaby fucks off.

>>452710
LadBaby will never fuck off. We've got at least another 5 years of sausage roll themed song parodies to raise money for the starving at Christmas. LadBaby is eternal.

>>452711
He's still pumping out quality sausage roll based content.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74SPa9GlJWo

>>452712
I'd give his wife my deep fried sausage roll iykwim.

>>452713
She'd supply the batter.

FANNY BATTER!

I've had a listen to the Guardian's 'songs of the summer' and they're all shit. I don't know whether that's a reflection on me, modern music or the tastes of Guardian journalists.

It's raining now. I hope you're bloody happy. Twats. Look what you've done.

>>452718


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ckPatPBAk8

If you people don't use microwaves how on earth do you cook your vegetables?

>>452720
I used to boil them, but then I bought a steamer. Steamers are a bastard to wash, but the vegetables are slightly nicer.

>>452721
Can't you steam them in the microwave with a bit of water and a porous lid?

>>452720

>>452722
You can probably do all sorts of things with a microwave if you own one.

>>452721

I've kept an asparagus steamer from an ex who said I could have it when we broke up. You put your asparagus in it upright and it sits in kind of a removable basket inside the pot, and you're meant to fill it with only about two to three centimetres of water.

Problem is, it's literally only good for steaming asparagus. It's difficult to use for pretty much anything else because it's quite narrow and tall. So it really only takes up space and collects dust in your kitchen, save for the few times a year that you're actually having asparagus. Also, as the asparagus becomes soft from the steam, it kind of sags in on itself and has kinks in it when you serve it. So I've pretty much gone back to cooking my asparagus lying down in a regular pot.

>>452734
it's not the only use.
They also make really good hobbyist vapour phase reflow ovens, if they're suitable for induction hobs.
Th combination of thick base, tall, handles, glass lid and tall/thin aspect ratio is just about right.
You just need some (cripplingly expensive) Galden fluid.

>>452734

Rhubarb?

>>452745
surely cooking rhubarb without cutting it up just gets you long strings in your teeth?
I love the stuff, but it's not exactly tractable when it's cooked.

>>452747

Yeah, you're right. I am just thinking of other long things to cook. Carrots? Courgette? Turnips? Vertical sausage?

>>452748
Stock pot if you want concentrated stock from a chicken carcass? Just cram it in...

Steamers are the wrong way to cook asparagus, anyway. Dump it in a frying pan with a tiny bit of water (1mm depth, maybe?), stick lid on, steam asparagus (stays straight). After 30 secs of steaming, remove lid, whack heat up to boil off remainder of water, then add a smidgeon of butter or a lesser oil once the water is gone, shake, cook until outer surface is as you want it. Sounds like a palaver, takes about 4 minutes, produces best asparagus. Steaming is for people who hate asparagus and who want their victims to also hate the stuff.

What's the best time to knock on their door and ask the neighbour for the package they took delivery of yesterday? 9am?

I've just peeled some jacket potato skin from the bottom of my air fryer. Nice and crunchy and salty it was. I'd say it's actually better than crisps.

>>452767
I would knock now, and if they aren't in, they won't know you went over now when you go over again at 6pm.

>>452769
I might just kill myself instead.

>>452770
Don't do that. The world needs considerate knockers such as you. The meek will inherit the Earth. Besides, you have a delivery you haven't collected yet.

Someone on a thread I can't find was bemoaning the price of instant coffee.
These 500g tubs are what you need - decant it into your last glass jar for convenience (and not a kilner jar, kilnerjarlasslad).
It's normally £5 (or £4 on a good week) - I've never seen it at the £7.50 they're failing to charge online. Or maybe it really is the end of days, and coffeegeddon's coming. Fuck. Anyway, pack your coffee, in bulk. Or drink tea, I guess.

>>452778
>These 500g tubs are what you need - decant it into your last glass jar for convenience

TAKE IT OUT OF THE CONTAINER AND PUT IT IN A CONTAINER.

I have very badly sprained my wrist playing virtual reality table tennis. I should probably see a doctor about it, but I'd be less embarrassed if it was a wanking injury. I crippled myself playing pretend ping pong, for fuck's sake. There wasn't even a table to twat my knuckles on.

Don't get old, lads.

>>452779
yeah, but spooning it out of the massive tub is a pain, several times a day. I can pour it into a jar once a week, then pour it from jar into mug, for a spoonless coffee. It's an efficiency thing, not a wanky kilner jar thing.

I think it was groovy ay eff for them to close my UC claim without telling me.

>>452778

Problem is if you're going to drink own brand instant, you might as well go out into the garden, and put a teaspoon of dry soil in your cup. It'd probably taste better.

I'm no coffee snob, I'm not going to sit and pretend you have to have hand-ground beans in a moka pot that have been matured up a Peruvian teenager's fanny or whatever. But there's a minimum level for coffee to be really drinkable, and none of the supermarket's own brand passes muster. You have to be at least Douwe Egberts or above, and that's where it gets steep.

I might as well be drinking the Peruvian fanny beans, at these prices. If I am forced to go back to Alcafe, then it's definitive proof of the failure of capitalism, not even ex-soviet bloc countries have to live in such deprivation.

>>452782
>spooning it out of the massive tub is a pain, several times a day.

You limp-wristed ponce.

>>452785
It does sound like that, but I'm really not. I just resent either having to rinse and dry a spoon off each time, or using a dozen spoons a day, or rummaging around in a pristine tub of coffee with a wet manky spoon.
This way is spoonless. I just pour some coffee into the mug (which gets washed once a year, whether it needs it or not), then add water. Then add more water, since instant coffee does that weird re-levelling thing, whether it had nasty fake foam on top or not.
So I'm actually a finely honed slob, rather than a fop.
As for coffeesnoblad, Souwe Egberts is at least as nasty as industial own-brand instant. If I want nice coffee, I'll grind some and neck a cafetiere of it, but cba to go through that five times a day. Hoicking the warm spent grounds out of the cafetiere is a foul feeling, makes me feel like I'm rummaging around inside your mum.

>>452786
>This way is spoonless. I just pour some coffee into the mug (which gets washed once a year, whether it needs it or not), then add water. Then add more water, since instant coffee does that weird re-levelling thing, whether it had nasty fake foam on top or not.

What do you use to stir your coffee? Let me guess, you swill it around in your mouth and spit it back into the cup so it's all mixed together?

>>452787
the pouring water. First inch, wait a second or two for it to dissolve, then dilute with the rest. Perfect mix, no spoon. Pint mug, may or may not work with smaller mugs.
Even hot chocolate can be made this way if you pour from a sufficient height. As we all know from Charlie & the chocolate factory, a waterfall is the only way to properly mix chocolate. Same goes for hot chocolate. Spoons are for the weak.

Really fancy Dominos for lunch but they don't deliver where I live, so I'd have to go collect it.

So now I'm stuck in a quandary of which of the two relatively equidistant Dominos I live between would be easiest to drive to, and how little effort I can put in to appearing presentable to go outside.

>>452786

I have a feeling you won't survive the Apocalypse.

Also though, I avoid instant coffee whenever I can because even the upmarket brands are complete shite compared to an actual coffee brewed from coffee beans.

>>452790 I have a feeling you won't survive the Apocalypse.

I've got a better chance than most - especially that lad who's about to starve to death because he's equidistant between two Dominos.
Granted, if my coffee supply dries up I'm fucked, but while you lot are packing your rice, I'll be looting coffee, and planting tea for when that runs out.
I'm not 100% sure I want to survive the apocalypse, though. Fun engineering challenge, but most scenarios don't look like a lot of joy to be had.

>>452790 actual coffee brewed from coffee beans.

Just treat instant coffee as a different drink to real coffee. They're competing about as much as tea competes with coffee - embrace all the drinks.

The reason to drink instant is for convenience, not taste; obviously if you want good coffee you get the real thing, everyone knows that.

But that's not the criteria against which instant is being judged, it's a totally redundant point to make. You're going to drink instant because nobody can be arsed brewing real coffee several times a day- But that doesn't mean you're going to settle for drinking heavily diluted mud either.

Kenco Milcano isn't too bad. I've also found drinking it with whole milk stops it tasting quite as watery and bland.

Liz Truss is looking scrummier and scrummier every day.

>>452795
Keep your thirst to one thread, lad.

>>452795>>452796
Preferably one on another website.

I watched the lady football earlier and, apart from the cunting England band, it was alright if you can accept their limitations. I think what the women's game is really missing is properly attractive players; they aren't ugly but there's no stunners out there.

>>452800
Do you think they wear make-up on the pitch? Not a rhetorical question, I've never watched.

>>452801
I doubt it. They get quite sweaty and a few of them were very purple-looking by the end of the match.

>>452802

I bet 8, 14 and backwards S scrub up nicely.

>>452802

Wait, their shirts say Sweden.
Here are the brits: https://www.englandfootball.com/womens-senior-team/squad
Aside from the goalies looking like they were made in the Skyrim character creator I'm not sure what you think is wrong with them.

>>452800
I really enjoy women's football, but only the international tournaments for some reason. I can't muster even the slightest interest in women's league football, despite my love for women's World Cups and Euros. However, one thing that upsets me enormously is that because of this, I will pick out a selection of favourite players in one tournament, and then by the time I next watch women's football, all my favourite players have retired aged 28 and will never play again. I can't even fancy the current crop, because my heart will forever belong to Laure Boulleau of France. Much as I love Alessia Russo this tournament, it feels like waifu infidelity to sing her praises the way I did for Laure Boulleau, or indeed Louisa Necib who also played for France around the same time.

>>452803
The ones you picked out are Leah Williamson (total babe), Fran Kirby (I don't see it, but there's a poster on 4chan's /sp/ board who really loves her) and Lucy Bronze (frankly hideous former Ballon d'Or winner).

>>452801
Many of them do. Alex Greenwood has giant false eyelashes too, which makes her look like a filthy scrote.

>>452571
In news that might give the more knitwear oriented of you a ferociously intense hard-on, it is currently 9 degrees celsius outside. It’s nice to grace single digit temperatures once more, before next Summer renders the nation “economically unviable” in the words of PM Truss and we are sold to a US-based consortium who immediately renege on earlier pledges not render the population into chicken nuggets.

>>452800

Women's football is a frightening crucible of lesbian drama. I want to absolutely emphasise that it is not a male fantasy readers wives type of thing, but a "somebody just headbutted their ex's new girlfriend in the car park" thing.

>>452808
As far as I can tell, rugby and hockey are the sports of choice for lesbians. Those and roller derby.

>>452809

Of the 23 members of the England squad, seven are known to be gay. Two of them are going out with each other - Lucy Bronze and Keira Walsh. There's another half dozen or so who it would be impolite of me to name but are very definitely gay.

>>452815

There are also gay men who play football.

https://www.stonewallfc.com/

>>452816

According to the ONS, 2.2% of the UK population identify as lesbian, gay or bisexual. 30% of the England women's squad are openly gay. ~0.025% of male professional footballers are openly gay, namely Jake Daniels. It should be fairly uncontroversial to suggest that women's football is very gay and men's football is, if not overtly homophobic, then certainly quite backwards when it comes to LGBT+ inclusion.

Paid £4 for a 99 today. Daylight robbery. This was in Bradford as well.

On the subject of football, I think I saw more girls than boys wearing football shirts today.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GV1yzTp3uto

MORE SOSSAGE ROLLS!

>>452818

>Paid £4 for a 99 today.

Burn the cunt's van down. I know diesel is expensive, I know that ice cream vans need to make hay while the sun shines, but £4 for a 99 is just taking the piss.

>>452819
I look forward to when he inevitably cheats on his wife and they both end up going completely off the rails.

I've watched the original Final Destination film for the first time in about fifteen years. I'd completely forgotten that Stifler is in it. The stupidest part was when Ali Larter's character was asked a question on the phone and she nodded instead of saying yes, but the person at the other end seemed to be aware of this.

RIP ARE BERNARD
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-62330478

>>452819
Surely the sausage roll gimmick is tired by now? Unless he's doing the Stewart Lee thing of retreading something so much, it goes from funny to boring to funny again. LadBaby could well be one of the most gifted comedians of our time, a cheeky chappy British Andy Kaufman or something.

>>452836
Don't make us post the video of him meeting his fans again. They're clearly as thick as pig shit.

>>452837

LadBaby or Stewart Lee?

>>452836
I refer you to the episode of Phoenix Nights with the comedy night, and Brian Potter heckling the alternative comedian: "Tell us a joke we know!"

For some people, comedy is not about transgression but rather the exact opposite. This is why Mrs Brown's Boys is successful, despite being made 40 years later than you would expect from looking at it. It's like a nostalgic return to a time that can only be described in terms I reject for being nauseatingly patronising: comforting, reassuring, easy to understand. You don't need to think. If someone told me my hobbies were like that, I would kick them in the bollocks, but not everyone is like me and some people really do just love to hear the same joke in the charts every Christmas.

>>452839

The rejection of sausage roll-based humour by the so-called intelligentsia is why Brexit happened.

How easy (and cheap) is it to learn to shoot in this country? Say, I just wanted someone to teach me how to fire a rifle at a few targets or something. Maybe not clay pigeons.

Also, are you sure LadBaby is actually trying to be funny? I haven't really watched him but I thought his thing was just going on about sausage rolls and people like it because it reminds them how much they also like a sausage roll. A bit like nostalgia, but not.

>>452841

Sostalgia?

So far I've got Keith Flint and Bruce Willis on my "Bad Hairline Inspo" board. Anyone else I'm missing?

Imagine being LadBaby's child. Yay, you're going to Majorca, oh wait you're going to spend a day trailing around with your manchild dad and fat mam, looking for sausage rolls for their YouTube channel watched solely by mongs.

>>452841

>How easy (and cheap) is it to learn to shoot in this country?

Relatively easy and cheap.

If you want to start with air rifles, you can just go out and buy one. No license is required, but you will need to present photo ID. A basic air rifle outfit starts at about £200 with all the gubbins you'll need and a tin of 500 pellets costs about £8. There are loads of air rifle clubs shooting a variety of disciplines; the most popular discipline is called Field Target, which is a bit like a cross between simulated hunting and mini golf. Most air rifle clubs are just a portakabin on a spare field and membership starts at as little as £20 per year.

Proper rifles are slightly more of a faff, but it's not prohibitive by any means. Google for your local club and get in touch. They'll sometimes have open evenings or taster sessions, but it's often just a case of "come down on Thursday night and have a go". It's effectively a legal requirement to be an active member of a club before you can get a firearms license, so practically all clubs have a selection of guns that new and prospective members can use on club premises. Clubs are legally required to provide full safety training for new members.

If you decide to join, you'll need two forms of ID and a character reference; the club will submit your details to the police for a background check to make sure you aren't a nutter or a daft militant wog. Club fees are typically £100 to £300 per year depending on the level of facilities on offer. Cheap rimfire ammunition for practice costs about 10p per cartridge. If you want to buy your own rifle, the club licensing secretary will be able to walk you through the paperwork to apply for a Firearms Certificate. A basic rifle starts at about £400.

>>452847
> If you want to start with air rifles, you can just go out and buy one. No license is required

This is true everywhere except Scotland where you do need a license. It’s mostly a formality but a requirement none the less.

What do I need to look for in a new washing machine? They all look the same to me.

>>452849
Now now, there's no need to be a washing machine racist about it. I would suggest being able to wash at a very low temperature such as 30 degrees, because this is being pushed more and more these days. Also see if you can find one that also has a very hot wash, in case you massively shit yourself one day.

>>452849
>They all look the same to me.

And they are. All of them will wash your clothes. A fact that no multitude of fancy features can belie.

You generally can't go wrong with spending £500 on whatever brand-name washing machine they have on sale that week.

I would stick to trusted names like Bosch or Samsung (personally, I would buy Bosch only), and you should shop in the £500 price range, or go for a machine whose original price was around that. There are machines for 250-280 quid which will get the job done, but if you really want a washing machine that'll last ten to fifteen years without major repairs, that's not what I would go for.

I've got a Bosch washing machine that was 400 quid when I bought it more than ten years ago, and it hasn't given me any trouble, besides needing the motor's brushes changed last year. Compared to other machines, it's still built like a tank.

Bought a new bottle of Lanvin today. A cologne I used to wear a lot as a younglad. It's a bit like CK One, but it's dominated by lavender and bergamotte.

Women absolutely love it. Back then, they would ask me about it all the time. Not really my main motivation to buy it again, but I guess it helps.

>>452852
I wouldn't trust the opinions of women, lad. I get compliments when I'm running short and have had to borrow my son's Lynx Africa all the time from womenfolk. Do not trust their judgement.

>>452853

>Lynx Africa

Now, there's a smell like cheetah piss.

A good scent can go a long way though.

>>452849
We have a basic Currys essential one and it's lasted 5 years so far regardless of the awful cat hair, muddy, concrete powder laden stink that's been given to it.

>>452845

Jude Law, Jason Statham, Nic Cage.

>>452851
Thanks, lad. I'll see what deals there are, it's just a bit annoying I can't bide my time for a bargain as much as I'd like to because my current one is on the blink.

>>452855
The current washing machine is a Zanussi one which will have been bought either late 2013 or early 2014 for roughly £200.

>>452857

What's wrong with your current one? The most common faults (brushes, belt, pumps) are fairly straightforward fixes if you're handy with a screwdriver.

>>452858
There's a leak coming from somewhere underneath, which doesn't seem to be coming from one of the connecting pipes.

>>452859

>>452854

I've never really got this. I've had more than enough Lynx Africa gift sets off a distant aunt or grandma over the years to know what it smells like, and it's nowhere near as awful as people are always saying. It smells very sweet and pleasant to me. Not classy or anything, but it's hardly offensive.

I caught one of my exes out being a snob actually when I wore some and she complimented it. Albeit that was mixed in with Hugo Boss aftershave, but still. Now, there's a scent you can't go wrong with.

>>452861
>Now, there's a scent you can't go wrong with.

I didn't realise my dad posted here.

>>452861
The Lynx stereotype is based on the assumption that if some is good, then more must be better. And that not washing and wearing clean clothes can be counteracted by applying even more of it, like some kind of plague doctor miasma-theory logic.

Applied sparingly and using a proper anti-perspirant along with it, it's perfectly passable.

Don't be these guys, basically:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7t1Ydz7oZV4.

>>452862

Your dad has probably had more fanny than you've had hot dinners, son. Bet he can pull in a paisley shirt and brown loafers, while you're poncing around deciding which pair of Nikes you want for your birthday.

The absolute state of today's "men". Tch.

It wouldn't make any sense to get a shirt for a band I don't listen to, but I really like the design of this one with the cat on.

>>452862

What's a good modern scent? I'd like to get some aftershave/scent but don't want to ponce around a shop asking for recommendations or - God forbid - do some actual research of my own.

>>452866
You need to go somewhere like Boots and spray them on your wrists to see how they actually smell on you. People have different reacting sweat.