[ rss / options / help ]
post ]
[ b / iq / g / zoo ] [ e / news / lab ] [ v / nom / pol / eco / emo / 101 / shed ]
[ art / A / beat / boo / com / fat / job / lit / map / mph / poof / £$€¥ / spo / uhu / uni / x / y ] [ * | sfw | o ]

Return ] Entire Thread ] First 100 posts ] Last 50 posts ]

Posting mode: Reply
Reply ]
Subject   (reply to 3936)
File  []
>> No. 3936 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 1:45 pm
3936 Fat bastard weight loss thread
Get in here fatlads.

I've made an effort to properly lose weight but have stalled in the last 2 months - and it's starting to creep up. I used to lift weights 3x/week and control the diet, but I can't lift for a while until some medical stuff gets sorted. This has taken a bit of a hit on my progress - or more likely,ive used it an excuse to slack.

What's your story?

P.s. I track calories and weight using my fitness pal.
Expand all images.
>> No. 3937 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 1:55 pm
3937 spacer

Screen Shot 2016-10-27 at 13.54.52.png
Withings Wifi Scales are brilliant.

This is me coming to the end of 2 months of 800 calories per day.

Seems to work!
>> No. 3938 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 2:01 pm
3938 spacer
I am also trying to lose weight.

I had a badly herniated disc earlier this year (L4/5), and this meant that exercise was off the table while I was recuperating. Well, not all exercise, I was shown certain exercises and movements in physiotherapy that I am supposed to do to strengthen my lower back.

But the problem is that in the last eight or nine months or so, I was unable to pursue my usual exercise regimen of two to thee nights a week at the gym and a good 30 to 40 miles a week on my cross country bicycle through the wilderness near where I live. And both that and a good amount of stress at work when I returned to it, with loads of overtime and late night take aways, mean that I have put on almost a stone and a half since early March.

I weigh around 14 and a half st at 6'1, which isn't terribly overweight, but the problem is that most of my new additional body weight is centered around my waist. And having to move around an extra stone and a half with every move I make is kind of a very bad thing in terms of my long-term recovery from my herniated disc.

So today marks the first day of me being on a diet. I will get out my bicycle tonight and brave the adverse weather and try to do ten miles round-trip along the river for starters.
>> No. 3939 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 2:05 pm
3939 spacer
Right, I'm in. Spreadsheet lad from ages ago, just booked skiing for March and need to be rather less of a lard-lump by then.
I'm no longer living on my own, and the Mrs is going to give me constant grief for being unsociable and obsessive, but it's the only way I can do this. I might be able to get her to come along with me (since she's a biffer, too), but I can't see that ending well.
At least Aldi's opened nearby since last time, so cheap veg will take the edge off.
>> No. 3940 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 3:04 pm
3940 spacer
>I will get out my bicycle tonight and brave the adverse weather and try to do ten miles round-trip along the river for starters.

I think this is part of the problem when starting a diet. People try to do everything at once - during my recent diet, I didn't do any extra exercise during the first month. I've done a few very small runs in the past couple of weeks, but they're much easier now I'm 10% lighter than I was - I've been using the runs to simply top-up my 10k steps per day.

I think focusing on the eating part first makes more sense - it is more difficult to be honest, but it is often the root of the problem. It's too easy I think to convince yourself that everything is fine because you can actually cycle 10 miles (which is great), but if you're still eating buckets of lard or whatever, it kind of misses the point.
>> No. 3942 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 3:07 pm
3942 spacer
Skiing takes it out of you for sure - being a little bit fitter makes all the difference. I'm qualified as a ski/snowboard instructor - for the three months before a trip, I try and spend 20 minutes on a balance board every day. You can buy them from Amazon for £25, you don't need anything fancy, just something to work on propriorecepter (thats balance) training.
>> No. 3943 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 3:45 pm
3943 spacer

>It's too easy I think to convince yourself that everything is fine because you can actually cycle 10 miles (which is great), but if you're still eating buckets of lard or whatever, it kind of misses the point.

Not necessarily. Ten miles on a bicycle, if you really give it your all, can burn up to 800 calories. Also, it speeds up your metabolism, an effect that will last for a number of hours each time. Which means that your fry up at night or your kebab or fish and chips will also be converted into energy more readily.

But yes, generally speaking, you're right in that even strenuous exercise will not make you achieve your goal if it isn't accompanied by an adequate diet.
>> No. 3944 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 4:17 pm
3944 spacer

Forgot picture, one of these.
>> No. 3945 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 4:21 pm
3945 spacer
>Which means that your fry up at night or your kebab or fish and chips will also be converted into energy more readily.

You're right that a good bike ride consumes calories and raises your metabolism - but I think its a fallacy to then say (or think) that justifies eating a fry-up. I've met plenty of large/fat people who can exercise quite well (it actually takes strength/power to haul around that extra weight, after all).

Exercising is actually very easy - changing your mindset towards what and how you eat is far harder, but is the root of the problem. It's too easy to fall into the trap of thinking "I just cycled 800 calories, a kebab is fine".
>> No. 3946 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 4:37 pm
3946 spacer
Proprioception is awareness of relative position of body parts. Balance is equilibrioception.
>> No. 3947 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 5:24 pm
3947 spacer
I'm grateful for your precision, thank you.
>> No. 3948 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 5:35 pm
3948 spacer
I've been smashing the scales at 115kg (+/- 2kg) for the last year and it's doing my head in. My lifestyle since then has changed completely (I'm no longer drinking 10-20 beers a night and I do 6-9 hours of decent exercise a week) and yet my scale weight has refused to change despite everyone telling me how much slimmer I am.

This leaves us with one of the following, all equally miserable, possibilities:

- I'm a scientific marvel who either refuses to respond to calorific deficit, or is actually managing to "recompose" his weight from fat to muscle or I'm pregnant .

- My bathroom scales are playing a malicious practical joke on me

- My liver is fucked and I'm retaining a ridiculous amount of fluid weight

- I'm some how subconsciously replacing all the calories that are no longer supplied by 10-20 beers and the ones burned off by all that exercise, without noticing.

At this rate I'll end up banging half a gram a week of test into my thighs while going on a 12 week starvation diet, because I'm running out of ideas.

Sage for the rage.
>> No. 3949 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 5:45 pm
3949 spacer
What do you eat? Keep a food diary. How many beers? What kind of exercise?
>> No. 3950 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 6:18 pm
3950 spacer

Keep a proper food log is a serious pain in the bollocks when you're married with a kid, although recognise the necessity of it. When you're eating complex dishes, although you can calculate the average calories per 100g (or whatever), you end up sitting there like a muppet weighing out exactly how much you've doled out onto your plate and hoping that you've got an average plate.

As a general outline it's basically chicken, beef, and vegetables. Occasionally eggs for breakfast. I don't eat bread or pasta, rarely eat potatoes (it's more likely to be sweet potatoes if I do) and I eat rice once a week when I go out for sushi. I don't drink sugary drinks (either fizzy drinks or juice).

I've largely replaced beer with wine (again) although not to the point where the calorie content would be anything like comparable. I do tend to drink beer on Saturdays, but again not to the point where it'd be equivalent to my previous 10-20 beers a day.

Exercise is basically Judo. I haven't been to the (weights) gym in over a month as I've upped my training for an upcoming competition, although I know that I need to go back. If you haven't done Judo or something similar before I don't think I can convey to you how physically arduous it is. I regularly lose 2 kilos in sweat during a 1.5 hour session.

Sage again for a largely pointless post screamed into the wind and which will amount to nothing more than "food diary and/or stop drinking completely".
>> No. 3951 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 6:21 pm
3951 spacer
>Keep a proper food log is a serious pain in the bollocks when you're married with a kid, although recognise the necessity of it.

What I've done is simply write everything down in a simple document. Record what I eat, estimate the calories and weight of portions, don't get too obsessive about that bit - but do write down how you feel, how hungry you are, what you ate and drink - just longhand, nothing scientific. I've found that enormously beneficial (also, I am married and have two kids).
>> No. 3952 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 6:32 pm
3952 spacer
Just got back from, well, pretty exactly ten miles of medium-level cycling. I was trying to push myself, albeit gently, considering it's been eight months since I meaningfully kept up my 30 to 40 miles a week regimen.

There is one section of bicycle path along the river bank here that I have always seen as a mark of my current shape, because it's a pretty steep 100-yard gradient, and at my best of times, I've been able to climb it sitting down in third gear, barely breaking a sweat. Well, not so this time, it was considerably more difficult... but again... eight months without consistent cycling, and with an extra stone and a half to move up that hill now.

Also, I must have a word with the local council. The bicycle and pedestrian paths along the river bank outside town haven't been cleared of all the fallen leaves at all this autumn. They've been lazy about it in the past, but this year, it's like they haven't even bothered. I veered off them a couple of times in the dark and ended up on very mucky uneven patches of grass. This warrants an angry letter.
>> No. 3953 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 6:39 pm
3953 spacer


>Keep a proper food log is a serious pain in the bollocks when you're married with a kid

You can always just say you're proudly sporting a dad bod... that's kind of fashionable at the moment...
>> No. 3954 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 6:41 pm
3954 spacer
Good work lad.
>> No. 3955 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 6:41 pm
3955 spacer

I've got just the pen for you, m7.
>> No. 3956 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 6:44 pm
3956 spacer

Green ink gets such a bad rap. I have some of this and it looks very attractive when I write. Never tried a letter of complaint though...
>> No. 3957 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 7:28 pm
3957 spacer

I once wrote an essay test in school with a red ink pen. Much to the dismay of our teacher, who reminded me in no uncertain terms that red is reserved for a teacher's comments on a test. And he threatened to deduct a few points off my next test if I would do it again.

Self sage for irrelevance to the thread topic.
>> No. 3958 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 7:36 pm
3958 spacer
Teachers are such fucking Nazis.
>> No. 3959 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 8:19 pm
3959 spacer

Diamine made in UK.jpg
Urgh. Anything but Parkers.
>> No. 3960 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 8:27 pm
3960 spacer
>> No. 3961 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 9:57 pm
3961 spacer

I went to Lidl tonight and bought some healthy food. All kinds of vegetables, fish, and chicken breast.

Hope this will help me lose weight and feel good doing it.
>> No. 3962 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 10:02 pm
3962 spacer
In 2013, I weighed 110kg. On Jan 1st this year, I weighed 77kg. I now weigh 86 and it's going badly in the wrong direction.
>> No. 3963 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 10:59 pm
3963 spacer
Losing 33kg in 3 years is a great achievement though. It also means you have the confidence/means to do it again. How did you do it?
>> No. 3964 Anonymous
27th October 2016
Thursday 11:55 pm
3964 spacer
Impressive. I almost have the exact same stats, except I weighed 71 on Jan this year. I now weigh 86 too.

I lost it all because I was out of work for a long period of time. I gained back most of it because I found employment.
>> No. 3965 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 9:14 am
3965 spacer
Eat less, move more. Religiously tracking calories on MFP.

It's a realisation I came to - I only lose serious weight when I'm being disciplined enough to track calories, but I've just has a REALLY shit year and hence no motivation to be disciplined, so I just eat shit.

The only reason I haven't put more on is that I do 2+ hours of light physical activity every work day (walking round a HUGE factory) and then get to the gym a day or two at the weekend.

It's my birthday weekend (birthday's Monday) so I'm having this weekend off, but then I need to get on it. Part of the problem is my work day -- 7am until 5pm. I get up, and have a small bowl of cereal because I can't stomach much more at 6am, and by 9 I'm starving, which means that I end up having one of the ridiculously cheap heart attack breakfasts from the canteen. Then, 2 hours later, it's lunch, and I've probably had my calorific intake for the day, but by 5.30 when I get home, I'm starving again. I eat much less at the weekend.
>> No. 3966 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 9:39 am
3966 spacer

Did alright yesterday, but fucking hell, rowing is knackering. I had to stop after 15 mins of really going for it and did a warm-down treadmill run instead. My original plan was two 15 minute pieces. Maybe next time!

I definitely recommend tracking calories with MFP (it integrates with fitbit), their database is huge and you can scan barcodes for added efficiency.
>> No. 3967 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 12:38 pm
3967 spacer

If that works for you, more power to you.

I'm just going to go the old fashioned route, which is to just seriously think before stuffing my face with food if it's good for me, and just simply taking on a rigorous exercise regime again.

I'm just not a fan of this whole "tracking" fad. If it helps you stay focused on your goal of losing weight, why not. But the old "exercise more, eat less" formula is still a worthwhile approach, and can make you lose weight just as efficiently.
>> No. 3968 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 1:45 pm
3968 spacer
Tracking your weight, exercise, diet like this with tech toys helps directly with motivation - it shows you, quickly, what is working and what isn't; direct feedback like that reinforces what you're doing and also gives you something to do during the low/hungry moments.
>> No. 3969 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 1:47 pm
3969 spacer
I actually have a rowing machine at home - it is worth starting off very slowly (2.30m/500m pace) and working on your rhythm and technique before you start going for it. Going for it too much (admittedly he was attempting HIT) is what gave Andrew Marr his stroke. Rowing is knackering if you don't have good technique, particular on your lower back. Within a week or two you can be doing an hour a day, but be careful going off to quickly on it.
>> No. 3970 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 1:54 pm
3970 spacer
>I only lose serious weight when I'm being disciplined enough to track calories

I found a similar thing. I looked back over the past 4 years of history on my scales (Withings, they're seriously good) and noticed that my weight climbed when I wasn't tracking it every day. I think nearly everyone seriously underestimates what they eat, particularly around portion control. Facing up to that and dealing with that mental process around how much you eat is the key I think.

There's also the issue of coping with hunger. The first couple of days without a lot of food (or VLCD like 600/800 calories per day) are miserable, feeling hungry sucks - but you realise it doesn't actually get any worse day after day, you reach a point of hunger where you think "this is shit", but the shit doesn't double tomorrow or the next day.

On my current diet I can sometimes feel a bit "sick" (wrong word, as I'm not sick but its the closest feeling I can describe) around 4.30/5pm, but I've learned thats also just as likely to be dehydration, so I drink something and the feeling goes away.

Went under 70kg this morning for the first time in 6 years. I'm a short-arse, so my natural weight is now about 3kg away. Happy days. (except for my trousers, none of my trousers fit now).
>> No. 3971 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 1:57 pm
3971 spacer
I went ketogenic in March. I don't really track macros or calories and I've gone from 103Kg -> 79Kg. I don't exercise at all.
>> No. 3972 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 2:57 pm
3972 spacer
I rowed for a long time at school, and had many long miserable sessions on the ergo. I can scarcely believe I'm willingly getting back on it, though this time I have Bluetooth headphones at least. My technique seems to be OK but I'm sure I'd not impress anyone who actually still rows.

I've drawn up an ergo plan' based on Concept2's training guide. Variable steady state on Monday, long intervals Tuesdays, short intervals Thursdays and long steady state on Friday. for the moment these are 20 minute workouts, with a 5 minute warm-up and some stretching beforehand. eventually they should go up to 30.
>> No. 3973 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 2:58 pm
3973 spacer

>Tracking your weight, exercise, diet like this with tech toys helps directly with motivation - it shows you, quickly, what is working and what isn't;

My bathroom scale does the same thing. Albeit admittedly not in as much detail and with such great data resolution. But it gets the job done. It has before. Once, I lost 14 kilograms in three months, and all I did was check my weight regularly with that scale. That was motivation enough.

Also, part of losing weight is reprogramming your mind. And by that I mean, you must reprogram your thinking towards preferring low-fat, low-sugar foods (some people even insist that cutting down your carbs is beneficial as well). No more tea time treats, no more sweets, no more pasties. No more take away dinners. When I lost those 14 kilos, I basically cut my food intake down to bare essentials like oven baked chicken breast, white fish, plain rice, whole wheat pasta and plain potatoes. And loads of fresh vegetables. And for tea or when I was bored at night in front of the TV, I would eat apples, carrot sticks, or other fruit and veg. Also, I swapped out my fizzy drinks for mineral water, and stopped putting sugar in my tea or coffee.

It takes a while to get yourself used to that. But it helps to think that all those high-fat, high-sugar foods are detrimental to your goal of losing weight.

And together with a rigorous workout regime and cycling 30 to 40 miles a week, the success was spectacular. 14 kilos in three months, like I said. That's three quarters of a stone each month. I often felt like shit during that time, and I was pretty much constantly hungry. But it was immensely effective. I could have kept it up, but at some point I went to my GP and told him I had lost 14 kilos. And he looked me over and said "You've done enough now. Please stop."
>> No. 3974 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 3:07 pm
3974 spacer
Whenever I feel sorry for myself about losing weight, I like to re-read this article; http://startingstrength.com/article/how_to_lose_40_lb_of_fat_in_63_days

It's about a competitive weightlifter who decides he wants to enter a bodybuilding competition, but had to lose 40 lbs in 63 days. It is harrowing reading.
>> No. 3975 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 3:23 pm
3975 spacer

There comes a point when weight loss just becomes unhealthy and you're crash dieting. Even while you are on a diet, your body needs a minimum of nutrients, vitamins, and the lot. My GP advised me that unless somebody is morbidly obese, the limit of healthy dieting is about 6 to 8 lbs a month. If you lose significantly more, it's not good for your body and you can expect serious adverse side effects. With my 10 lbs a month, I was already above that.

My mum did a crash diet once when she was young, after she had me. Apparently, she managed to starve herself back to her old weight before she got pregnant, but it got so extreme that she suffered degenerative symptoms on her optic nerve in one eye. That isn't normal for a healthy woman in her late 20s. Her doctor told her that that was due to a lack of nutrients because she was crash dieting.
>> No. 3976 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 3:24 pm
3976 spacer
Ketogenic diets are interesting, a bit like Atkins v2 - I don't eat meat or dairy though, so a protein rich diet is actually more difficult for me. Same with Paleo, which is similar - not great if you're not a meat eater.
>> No. 3977 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 3:26 pm
3977 spacer

I always like this image. "I'm just big boned". No you're not.
>> No. 3978 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 3:34 pm
3978 spacer
The guy who did it isn't normal - he didn't hold down a proper job, he was a full time athlete having regular consultations with a trained professional. It's still an inspirational story for someone like me who just needs added oomph to turn down a doughnut at work.
>> No. 3979 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 3:39 pm
3979 spacer
Great article. I loved this paragraph, have felt the same recently.

“That goddamned exercise bike wears me down. Interestingly, my best cardio results occurred using my legs, running my ass off up hills. Live and learn. Throughout the whole thing, you realize that being hungry is this amazing state that only people that have been through it really understand. I suddenly had no patience for anyone who didn’t have the dedication to lose weight. When someone tells you that they just can’t lose weight, and at that very moment you would kill for one spoonful of peanut butter, your sympathy for the less-dedicated goes right out the window. Really? You can’t lose weight? Put down the Pringles, that would be a good start. Wake up at 5 am and get on the exercise bike and pedal your ass off while listening to some hot music; pool some sweat on the floor. Oh you can’t do that? Then stay eternally fat, fat person.
>> No. 3980 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 3:48 pm
3980 spacer

A good one is also "I've got a metabolic disorder".

Erm, no, love. There is about a 90 percent chance that you do not.
>> No. 3981 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 4:18 pm
3981 spacer

I think a better story is The Fat Cycle Rider. He lost eight stone in a year and kept it off. He started cycling to work, he gave up the chips and steadily lost weight. He had setbacks and failures, but he plodded his way to a healthy lifestyle and a weight. There was no "one weird trick", it wasn't an ordeal, he just did a few sensible things.

>> No. 3982 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 4:29 pm
3982 spacer
You'll be fine then - you're right, a Concept2 erg is a miserable machine, but very effective. I think their training plans are really good too, have used them in the past.

If you're into the gadgets, there are some very cheap cables/apps that will link an ergo to your phone - you can do all the live rowing stuff against other people, which is kind of nice, I really like the fact though that if you do that, everything is uploaded and recorded to a central place.
>> No. 3983 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 4:31 pm
3983 spacer
I think I'll look into that - a notepad works but I've found that automated systems that shove your face into the data are the best.
>> No. 3987 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 7:38 pm
3987 spacer

> The degree of discipline, depravation, and the lack of variety, the radically increased volume of exercise needed to spur rapid fat loss, would be beyond the mental and physical abilities of a regular civilian.

That got me excited, then I realised that he meant deprivation.
>> No. 3988 Anonymous
28th October 2016
Friday 10:19 pm
3988 spacer

depraved... deprived... same thong really...

I actually went to the gym again tonight and did two hours of cardio and weight lifting. Hoping to keep it up. Tomorrow, I'll do another 10 to 15 miles on my bike.
>> No. 3990 Anonymous
29th October 2016
Saturday 9:55 pm
3990 spacer

Aaand... that's another ten miles on my bike done.

They still haven't removed the leaves from the bicycle paths. What if somebody hurts themselves? This is an upsettingly lax attitude towards health and safety.
>> No. 3991 Anonymous
29th October 2016
Saturday 11:27 pm
3991 spacer

I had a cracking time doing forestry work today. I was on my feet the entire time. I did pig out a little in the day but I don't feel bad, it was knackering.
>> No. 3992 Anonymous
30th October 2016
Sunday 12:52 am
3992 spacer


I am pigging out as well a bit, in that I bought a bottle of Harvest Gold Mead at Morrison's again tonight. It's some cracking good mead, but alas, it's a pure calorie bomb.

Hot mead is just divine. I can see why the Vikings called it a gift from the gods. As you might be able to tell, I've already had two whole mugs of it.
>> No. 3993 Anonymous
30th October 2016
Sunday 1:17 am
3993 spacer
I've been eating shit whilst living at home for the past five months and have put on a few kilos. Moved in with some guys from work (my age, I don't work with them, different departments) and am going to use it as an opportunity to change my consumption habits.
>> No. 3994 Anonymous
30th October 2016
Sunday 1:25 am
3994 spacer
Blimey mate. That's a day of work.
>> No. 3995 Anonymous
30th October 2016
Sunday 1:07 am
3995 spacer
My contribution to my weight-loss today was to take a heavy dose of stimulants in the morning so that I wouldn't have to eat all day and then totally negate the whole affair by helping the comedown with the few beers.
>> No. 3996 Anonymous
30th October 2016
Sunday 3:43 pm
3996 spacer

Pilates is hard. I don't know how effective it is from a weight loss perspective as the aerobic stuff never went that high, but it was really tough. I spent much of it floundering around like a cunt.

Kept me away from the sofa at least and it was free with gym membership.
>> No. 4007 Anonymous
31st October 2016
Monday 5:59 pm
4007 spacer
Ate too much this weekend.
>> No. 4009 Anonymous
31st October 2016
Monday 7:40 pm
4009 spacer

Ketogenic diets aren't high in protein, only moderate as excess protein is converted into glycogen. A high fat diet is easily achievable even without meat or dairy (nuts, MCT oil).

All I can say is that I feel great. No longer crave food in general, eating is purely functional.
>> No. 4013 Anonymous
7th November 2016
Monday 12:44 am
4013 spacer
I've returned to a somewhat constant regime of cycling and gym exercise the last ten days and I am becoming slightly proud of myself that I am slowly but surely taking up my old cycle again of 30 miles a week on my bike and two to three times a week at the gym.

My weight has gone down by just under two pounds, but I put that down to normal fluctuation. After all, just by drinking a pint of water, you technically gain about a pound. But once I will have lost something like five pounds, I think that will be a much stronger indication that something is happening.

All in all, I would like to lose about a stone and a half. Somewhere along those lines.
>> No. 4014 Anonymous
7th November 2016
Monday 5:52 am
4014 spacer

>No longer crave food in general, eating is purely functional.

What a grim life to lead.
>> No. 4015 Anonymous
7th November 2016
Monday 9:35 pm
4015 spacer

The way the lad phrased it was quite mechanically grim. However, as someone who's massively curtailed their wayward gorging of shite, food, functional and otherwise, has become more valued and enjoyable to me.

What I'm saying in a roundabout way is that careful eating needn't be the sole pursuit of the neo-Puritan.
>> No. 4016 Anonymous
7th November 2016
Monday 9:54 pm
4016 spacer

>What I'm saying in a roundabout way is that careful eating needn't be the sole pursuit of the neo-Puritan.

Right. You'd be surprised how many calories you can save just by eating and cooking sensibly.

Just by avoiding heavy and fatty sauces and gravies, you can save around 200 to 300 calories every time. The same goes for any meat that is breaded (or battered) and deep fried. That's another easy 300 to 400 calories you can remove from your diet. Also, avoid any kind of fizzy drink unless it's mineral water. Things like Coca-Cola are just liquid sugar. Don't take your tea or coffee with sugar. And cancel tea time altogether.

With steps like these, you can eliminate up to 1000 calories from your daily diet. And if you choose the right foods, you can still have very delicious and satisfying meals.
>> No. 4017 Anonymous
7th November 2016
Monday 9:56 pm
4017 spacer


Like this?
>> No. 4018 Anonymous
7th November 2016
Monday 10:25 pm
4018 spacer

For myself it's more about cutting down on sugary snacks and getting more fruit and vegetables in me. But your advice is sound.


I wouldn't say that it goes in that order necessarily. I "feel better" than I did when I had a worse diet, but I'm also on antidepressants and actually going somewhere in life, so it would be daft to put it down to an increased banana intake. But eating shit does make you want more shit, usually, so it can definitely be a vicious circle. I still enjoy sweets, but the pangs of "I need chocolate in me now" don't get to me now.
>> No. 4019 Anonymous
7th November 2016
Monday 10:38 pm
4019 spacer
Never understood why people crave chocolate so much. Sure if you give me a bar of decent chocolate (i.e. not cadburys) it can be moreish, but in general I'm much more likely to crave half a block of stilton.
>> No. 4020 Anonymous
7th November 2016
Monday 10:41 pm
4020 spacer

Clearly you're a wealthy ponce.
>> No. 4021 Anonymous
7th November 2016
Monday 11:07 pm
4021 spacer
Living at home with my parents I put on several kilos just through eating shite out of boredom. Having moved out (again) I don't eat anything sugary at all. Fucking pain in the arse that it'll take ages to lose all this flab again.
>> No. 4022 Anonymous
8th November 2016
Tuesday 5:23 pm
4022 spacer

Similar thing happened to me over the course of a week; mounds of biscuits and ice cream that I'd never give a second thought to otherwise just sitting in the kitchen.
>> No. 4023 Anonymous
9th November 2016
Wednesday 9:54 pm
4023 spacer
Just got back from the gym again.

Really liking the fact that I have been able to get myself to return to a persistent and regular exercise routine. Weather permitting, I'll do another ten miles on my bike tomorrow night after work.
>> No. 4024 Anonymous
10th November 2016
Thursday 4:00 am
4024 spacer
I haven't had a drink in 10 days and I've lost around 3 kilos. The teetotaler diet works.
>> No. 4025 Anonymous
10th November 2016
Thursday 4:52 pm
4025 spacer
Cutting out any and all beer works wonders. I've heard you shouldn't eat a lot of tuna also but I forget why.
>> No. 4026 Anonymous
10th November 2016
Thursday 8:32 pm
4026 spacer

Anything that's alcohol with sugar in it is very bad for your waistline.

It'll be sad to go without Lidl's gluhwein this Christmas. Or without my favourite drink during the winter season, hot mead.

Did another ten miles tonight after work through mud and hostile weather. Well pleased with myself.
>> No. 4027 Anonymous
11th November 2016
Friday 12:07 am
4027 spacer
High mercury levels in canned tuna, and some other canned fish.
>> No. 4028 Anonymous
11th November 2016
Friday 1:17 am
4028 spacer
Blind boy Boatclub is my goal body.
>> No. 4029 Anonymous
11th November 2016
Friday 6:05 am
4029 spacer

I'd need to gain weight to look like Mr Chrome.
>> No. 4030 Anonymous
11th November 2016
Friday 6:09 am
4030 spacer

Also it's being overfished.
>> No. 4031 Anonymous
11th November 2016
Friday 7:00 am
4031 spacer

Well Mr Chrome's the fat one so don't feel bad.
>> No. 4032 Anonymous
11th November 2016
Friday 7:15 am
4032 spacer

Wrong way round mate. Blindboy is the podgy philosopher, Mr Chrome is the skinny nutter who takes too many yokes.

>> No. 4033 Anonymous
11th November 2016
Friday 7:28 am
4033 spacer

Ahh, yeah, my mistake. Regardless I want to be unsettlingly sinewy.
>> No. 4034 Anonymous
11th November 2016
Friday 7:55 am
4034 spacer

In that case, I highly recommend amphetamine binges and chain smoking.
>> No. 4035 Anonymous
11th November 2016
Friday 10:24 am
4035 spacer
This was working for me up until recently, when I found that the best way to get myself through a comedown was to eat an entire packet of chocolate chip Hob Nobs over the course of the day and stay hopped up on sugar, thereby replenishing the 1000+ calories I'd missed out on in yesterday's binge.
>> No. 4036 Anonymous
11th November 2016
Friday 1:52 pm
4036 spacer

Similar boat except that I drink like a fucking navvy during the comedown instead.
>> No. 4037 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 7:55 pm
4037 spacer
I consider myself one of the resident /fat/lads here, normally lifting a few times a week with impressive [/s]middling[/s] acceptable numbers on the big lifts and a decent level of general fitness.

Yet, this evening I put on a pair of jeans in what I thought were my size and spotted the beginnings of a fucking muffin top.

This is not on.
>> No. 4038 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 8:14 pm
4038 spacer

I may well end up giving this a go.

In recent months, I've stopped leaving the house and my muffin top has grown into the belly-of-all-bellies. Probably not going to change soon, either. I just have no reason to go out any more.
>> No. 4039 Anonymous
18th November 2016
Friday 5:41 pm
4039 spacer
Drug use and fruit/veg smoothies for sustenance works for me. Once you start eating your 5 a day, your skin clears up, you sleep better, and your erectile dysfunction from being on camera stops being a problem.
>> No. 4040 Anonymous
19th November 2016
Saturday 11:49 pm
4040 spacer
I hit a PB squat the other day for 1RM and was then roundly rewarded by the belt loops on a pair of my favourite jeans ripping when I tried to get them over my monster quads.

None of my fucking trousers fit and I can't afford a new wardrobe, and I can't go around in trackies for the rest of my days because I don't work in a Fitness First.
>> No. 4041 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 4:11 pm
4041 spacer

This was one of the clinchers for me to actually start dieting. It was beginning to get difficult for me to slip into my favourite pairs of jeans. Also, I was at a funeral a while ago, and I've got a jet black suit for an occasion like that which I hadn't worn in quite a while. Its trousers were uncomfortably tight and I spent most of that morning at the funeral attempting to hold in my belly.

Having taken up cycling again and spending about two evenings a night at the gym now is actually beginning to pay off. My sister said I look a little bit slimmer around the back of my waist again already. I was actually beginning to develop muffin tops, and apparently that is reversing now.
>> No. 4042 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 4:41 pm
4042 spacer
It's also one of the best (worst) bits about getting to the end of my recent diet. I've lost almost 12% of my body weight, my body fat has gone from 22% to 15% i.e. I've lost a third of the fat in my body - I'm really happy with this, but now, none of my trousers fit.
>> No. 4044 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 4:58 pm
4044 spacer

Ass-to-grass squatting seems to have given me gracilis muscles that rub through the crotch and seat of the best denims. I feel your pain, mate.

Levi's 541 jeans are meant to be good for lifters. I also find the ones with a touch of elastane feel much better around the thigh.


Good job, mate.
>> No. 4045 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 5:05 pm
4045 spacer
I always aim for ass-to-grass as I train the Olympic lifts so I can relate a lot. There is apparently no stopping this upward accumulation of junk in my trunk. Ta for the commiserations. Though while we're here bitching, I've had to deload ridiculously on my snatch and even cleans after fucking up my shoulder by partially dislocating it in my sleep a few weeks ago (hypermobility can go fuck itself, frankly). My shoulders feel so weak even overhead squatting with the empty bar. Rehab is bullshit. Wahhhh/whinge ticked.
>> No. 4046 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 5:10 pm
4046 spacer

Nice, you're a proper weightlifter. My university gym let me play around with rubberised plates and platforms, but there's unfortunately nothing in my area that can accommodate the Olympic lifts aside from a Crossfit gym.

At some point I think I will join the dark side just so I can practice my snatch.
>> No. 4047 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 10:37 pm
4047 spacer
I'm not really back to big weights yet at my gym. One of the fitness coaches there advised me that after a few months of inaction, it's best to increase your weight slowly, even if you feel you could lift more. Your muscles need to get back into "gym mode" first. And then you can gradually dial it up again to whatever you can bench, press or lift.
>> No. 4048 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 2:12 am
4048 spacer
Mhmm. You go girl, fruity to the booty.
>> No. 4050 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 7:51 pm
4050 spacer
Yep, I train at a CrossFit box/gym (but don't actually do CrossFit). My trainer is a weightlifting specialist and is bezzie mates with the dude who owns the gym and has an arrangement where he coaches the barbell club and watches over the incorporation of the Oly lifts within the CrossFitting, and in exchange is allowed to use the gym space for his personal training. If you can find a similar space where they're not fannies about using chalk or dropping the bar (from below the shoulder) I'd really recommend it. Have you popped into the CrossFit gym to see what it's like? It might be a nice one like mine. If you are serious about pursuing the Oly lifts (and you should be, cause weightlifting is fucking great) I cannot overstate how necessary a coach is - they're highly technical, complex movements that can pure fuck you up if you don't have your form and technique down.

Absolutely as it should be. It takes a while for neurological adaptations to be made.
>> No. 4051 Anonymous
22nd November 2016
Tuesday 12:36 pm
4051 spacer

Funny timing, today I got an e-mail from my local cheapo gym telling me they're going to be improving the weights section, including a Magnum weights rack and a real Oly platform.

I'll probably end up going by the CrossFit one eventually, but for now I'm quite excited about the prospect of at least being able to some front squats, push press, etc.
>> No. 4052 Anonymous
22nd November 2016
Tuesday 5:59 pm
4052 spacer
Totally jealous of all you lucky bastards lads with access to deadlifting platforms and actual power racks and not fucking Smith Machines. I'd just about kill for access to a trap bar and a couple hundred kg in weights.

The only gym I've ever been to that had that kind of equipment also seemed to be permanently blessed by the presence of Eddie Hall and his mates, routinely deadlifting seven plates and letting rip the most obnoxious protein and trenbolone farts known to mankind and planet earth, which was enough to send me scurrying back to the hack squat machine where I belong.
>> No. 4053 Anonymous
22nd November 2016
Tuesday 7:14 pm
4053 spacer

Just do loads of push ups, you ponce.
>> No. 4085 Anonymous
2nd December 2016
Friday 5:03 pm
4085 spacer

Help me, I can't stop getting fatter
>> No. 4105 Anonymous
4th December 2016
Sunday 6:25 pm
4105 spacer
Fast. Eat After sunset only, like the Muslamics do every now and again.
>> No. 4106 Anonymous
4th December 2016
Sunday 7:19 pm
4106 spacer
I've come to discover that I like occasional fasting every now and again - I don't quite do the 5:2 thing on two days of the week, but almost. You don't get any hungrier once hungry, this idea was a revelation to me and I don't know why it took so many years to realise.
>> No. 4109 Anonymous
14th December 2016
Wednesday 10:35 pm
4109 spacer
Bicyclelad here.

I've actually lost almost a stone since I started dieting and exercising again. Weather is a bit shit here at the moment, so cycling has been less than I had hoped, but I am really beginning to feel like I am getting back in shape.

Kind of difficult to avoid all the Christmas treats at the moment though. At some point you begin to feel like you're being rude to your coworkers because you keep turning down their stollen slices or homemade gingerbread and what-have-you. But then when I tell them I am on a diet and have already lost almost a stone, they'll either understand and say "Aw, good on ya, lad", or they will become even pushier and tell you that since you have already lost a stone, two slices of butter an marzipan stollen with a lavish powdered sugar coating won't hurt you.
>> No. 4112 Anonymous
15th December 2016
Thursday 9:10 pm
4112 spacer
Spent the last week at a four star hotel with gorgeous food and ruined my gym and eating routine.
>> No. 4113 Anonymous
16th December 2016
Friday 12:04 am
4113 spacer
Sorry lads I hit my target weight this week - 67kg - I was almost 80kg a couple of months ago. I have started eating more than 800 calories a day. Blood Sugar Diet works great.

I don't want to discourage you with my annoying success (I've noticed how upset people get when you tell them you have successfully lost weight), more the idea that it definitely can be done.
>> No. 4114 Anonymous
16th December 2016
Friday 12:31 am
4114 spacer
Wait. You have been eating just 800 kcal a day? Wow. For how long? How small are you (height, weight, sex) for you to live happily on less than 800 kcal a day?

This is impressive.
>> No. 4115 Anonymous
16th December 2016
Friday 1:29 pm
4115 spacer

Not him, but assuming you're relatively sedentary you can go for quite a while on 800kcal providing you either don't mind hunger or you're using appetite suppressants of some kind or other. That's said it still seems like an incredibly insane way to lose weight, representing a 1300kcal per day deficit for an 80kg person and a still colossal 1200kcal per day deficit for someone at their "target weight" of 67kg.
>> No. 4116 Anonymous
16th December 2016
Friday 6:24 pm
4116 spacer

I asked my GP a while ago where he sees a safe threshold for you daily calorie intake on a diet. He told me that for an average sized healthy male adult with an average everyday routine, anything below 1500 kcal would be quite unhealthy if maintained for a longer period of time. And if you're also keeping up a steady exercise regime while you are dieting, you are looking more at a safe minimum of 1800 to 2000 kcal.
>> No. 4117 Anonymous
16th December 2016
Friday 7:33 pm
4117 spacer
I'm pretty sure it is as unhealthy as all the fat bastards who regularly eat way above 2000 kcal. Funnily enough, you never see everyone looking surprised at people regularly overeating and getting fat "over a long period of time."

How long did it take you to drop the weight, and just how flabby did you become?
>> No. 4118 Anonymous
16th December 2016
Friday 10:03 pm
4118 spacer

>you never see everyone looking surprised at people regularly overeating and getting fat "over a long period of time."

Because it's much easier to overeat than to undereat.

2000 calories a day is far less than many people think.
>> No. 4119 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 12:13 am
4119 spacer
More importantly, how are you going to keep your weight constant now? Are you planning to up your calorie intake at any point? Will you compensate for an increase with more activity until it's an average intake for your goal weight? Will you slow diet up to this amount to account for the changes in your metabolism after being on a deficit for so long? Just interested in your plans from here now you've reached your goal.
>> No. 4120 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 12:42 am
4120 spacer
So, is there any point lifting while trying to lose 20kgs? As I understand it, you need to eat to build muscles, but how can I achieve that while under-eating for the coming few months?
>> No. 4121 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 1:09 am
4121 spacer

Apologies if my statements here sound like they are from a different planet, but coming from a long term skinnylad,

>Because it's much easier to overeat than to undereat.

I've never understood this. Eating is a task that consumes a sizeable portion of your daily time, effort and money when you stop and look at it. I'm trying to gain weight (with mild success, I no longer resemble a holocaust victim, but I'm farfrom hench) and frankly I find packing in anything exceeding 2000 calories to be a chore.

In order to succeed without resorting to just stuffing junk food down my hole, I have to literally schedule my entire day around the act of eating, and it feels perverse. Is this how fat people live day to day?
>> No. 4122 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 1:16 am
4122 spacer
Drink more pop or fruit juice.
>> No. 4123 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 1:28 am
4123 spacer
Passive eating. Passive eating, mate.
>> No. 4124 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 6:12 am
4124 spacer

Yes, as long as you aren't the kind of retard who think losing weight is necessarily a good thing - muscle weighs more than fat mate. Lose the flab and gain the strength.


Tell em about it. I just aim for two grams of protein per kilo mass and hope. It is a fucking chore, especially in a hot climate. And I love cooking too.
>> No. 4125 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 6:16 am
4125 spacer
You have to learn to gorge. Buy a whole packet of donuts and scoff them. It's not about the food, it's about the drug. When I gorge I feel invincible , the king of the universe, an omnipotent eating machine. Shortly followed by a much longer feeling of regret.
>> No. 4126 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 1:14 pm
4126 spacer

I'd have no problem weighing the same as I do now, but all of that weight being muscle.

If you look at some bodybuilders, they usually have a kind of weight for their size that sounds unhealthy. But they are pure muscle (which has its own health risks, e.g. you need around 5 percent body fat for your body to function properly as a male adult). There's a difference between weighing 15 stone and all of that weight being body fat or, on the other hand, mostly muscle tissue.
>> No. 4127 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 1:37 pm
4127 spacer

As I think has already been stated, BMI is for measuring populations, not individuals.

I tip the higher end of my BMI at 24.5; only half a point from being considered 'overweight', but my cardiovascular health is better than it was in my teens. I've been consistently lifting and eating enough to gradually put on mass for about 5 years.

That being said, I'm probably 12 - 14% bf. Ideally I'd be sitting all year round at 10%, but you can't have everything.
>> No. 4128 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 5:05 pm
4128 spacer

Too little body fat as a bloke will not really help your looks beyond impressive abs.

Fat cells produce estrogen, some of which the male body also needs to keep a full head of hair and clean skin. If you look at some uber fatless bodybuilders, you will often see that their facial skin looks quite rough and uneven, and maybe it's just me, but the pro bodybuilders I see at my gym all really don't have that much hair left on their heads. And they're young fit blokes in their mid-20s to early 30s.
>> No. 4129 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 6:04 pm
4129 spacer

10% is what everyone thinks of as the "magic abs number", so I can understand why people want to aim for that, even though 12-15 is definitely a more athletically plausible BFP.

As for the bodybuilder lads, their lack of hair is probably more to do with higher than average levels of DHT.
>> No. 4130 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 6:41 pm
4130 spacer

Maybe they're compensating for their lack of hair with a lack of body fat?
>> No. 4131 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 6:48 pm
4131 spacer

> As for the bodybuilder lads, their lack of hair is probably more to do with higher than average levels of DHT.

Well, it's complex, that. It's not necessarily the DHT (which is also generated from certain steroids) that makes your hair fall out. What counts is an inherited hair follicle sesitivity towards DHT, which is believed to clog up the hair follicle blood supplies. So you've got some men who have quite high natural testosterone levels (among them many politicians and top-level business executives), and who will therefore also produce more DHT, but who still have full hair. Because their hair follicles are more tolerant of DHT.

But natural testosterone levels aside, it is believed that hair follicles simply have varying degrees of tolerance towards DHT deposits, and that what counts is the lifetime accumulation of DHT around those hair follicles, if those hair follicles are sensitive to DHT. Which also explains why the majority of men, although not all of them, don't go bald during their peak testosterone production years (ca. 18-24), but towards their late 20s and early 30s, when their testosterone levels are actually on the decline again.

But the estrogen that is produced by your body fat is also somewhat an antagonist to your testosterone. And estrogen regulates hair density both in men and women, which is one reason why quite a few women complain about thinning hair in their 40s, as their estrogen levels decrease.
>> No. 4132 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 7:04 pm
4132 spacer
Steroids will do that, creatine will a bit as well.
>> No. 4137 Anonymous
18th December 2016
Sunday 2:20 pm
4137 spacer

Absolutely I was just going shorthand. The point is that anyone with male pattern baldness has DHT sensitive hair follicles and that ramping up your T (and therefore DHT) levels on a regular basis will only hasten the process.


Creatine has nothing to do with it you tabloid reading nonce.
>> No. 4139 Anonymous
18th December 2016
Sunday 11:22 pm
4139 spacer

Yep, if you know that you've got it in your genes that you might go bald at some point in your life, then being a steroid-taking bodybuilder will not help you. Which again corroborates my observation about the pro bodybuilders at my gym all having thin hair, if that.

Luckily, in my family, there's no hereditary baldness on either side. My dad didn't live very long, he died at age 46, but still, he had no signs of baldness at all.
>> No. 4140 Anonymous
18th December 2016
Sunday 11:56 pm
4140 spacer
What caused your dad's death?
>> No. 4141 Anonymous
19th December 2016
Monday 12:21 am
4141 spacer

He took his own life after decades of latent depression.

Don't feel bad for asking. It is what it is.
>> No. 4142 Anonymous
19th December 2016
Monday 12:52 am
4142 spacer
I'm done lads. I think. I want to be the bloke on page 17 of the Shropshire Star holding up my XXXL shirt like a tent.

I'm 24, nearly 25. Always had a belly but it's accelerated since I went to Uni then returned home to work. I'm probably pushing twenty stone if not more, which is unacceptable for 5'10", even though I am probably about 2'4" wide, shouler bone to shoulder bone. Oddly not much else, my legs are actually quite toned but now I am starting to get a bit of the "bingo wings" kind of crease on my triceps and a double chin when I rest, along with the odd ache in my chest and pressure on my bladder.

Done a really good job of ruining some of the prime years of my life really, had a girlfriend when I was 17/18 and could expect to pull more than twice a year. Never got around to actually having sex with anyone like and I just feel out of the running, all of my mates are male and whilst skinnier, similarily lack female friends.

I feel like I'm in the gap between "normal" chubbier blokes and the almost irredeemable winched-into-ambulance types. Living at home still as well, I had a phase of chicken and vegetables every night whilst using the gym at Uni and actually put on a fair bit of muscle quickly whilst not boring of it, but the way my house is I can't really cook for myself every night and my mum is of the "own worst enemy" types that would think I was trying to be bulemic or something.
>> No. 4143 Anonymous
19th December 2016
Monday 2:55 am
4143 spacer

Go for it lad. Keep us posted. Go walking, then jogging, then running.

I got really into muscle gain for the first time last year and loved it. Now I've got a fucking frozen shoulder due to a fall and miss the exercise.

See if there are any "hashes" in your area, they are worth a shot.
>> No. 4144 Anonymous
19th December 2016
Monday 3:42 am
4144 spacer
Mate, you're pushing twenty stone.

I'm less than two thirds of that and I'm chubby.
>> No. 4145 Anonymous
19th December 2016
Monday 10:21 am
4145 spacer

I don't know how to say this without coming across as smug, but as fucked as my life is financially and socially, staying in shape has always been piss for me. I honestly sometimes wish I could trade a bit of that aptitude for the skills people seem to have in other areas of life.

In all seriousness, I've always wondered whether I could take a /fat/lad and make a project out of him, because fitness might be one of the only things I am more knowledgeable about than your average bloke.

But then that defeats the point in a lot of ways, I suppose. Even athletes can let themselves go when they finally no longer have a coach to shout at them. It's all about bringing those good behaviours out from within the individual, finding a sustainable activity, and all that wank.

That being said, if you need a starting point for practical advice/support, I'm more than happy to give it. I'm talking about actual suggestions on how to fit stuff into your life and not just 'do 5 reps for 5 sets'.

Sage for serious rambling.
>> No. 4146 Anonymous
19th December 2016
Monday 10:38 am
4146 spacer

I'm interested.
>> No. 4147 Anonymous
19th December 2016
Monday 10:57 am
4147 spacer

Are you twentystonelad? Here's a throwaway email if you want to chat shit.

>> No. 4148 Anonymous
19th December 2016
Monday 11:54 am
4148 spacer

No, but I have had to kill my exercise regime due to a frozen shoulder. At least keeping some cardio up would be good.

Anyway, it is probably best to just post advise in this thread, that way it will be shared.
>> No. 4160 Anonymous
24th December 2016
Saturday 10:54 pm
4160 spacer

4 years ago I got rid of my TV and internet connection then took to country walking maybe 3 or 4 times a week (staff and all, no shit, its awesome). I went from 16 to 13.5 stone, though it probably took the best part of a year. That lasted maybe another year, after which I began eating a bit more and my activity dropped.
I still don't have a TV or internet (currently using a friends), but now I'm 15 stone again, maybe ever so slightly over. I've moved to a less social area so I don't get out as much as I say I'd like to.

S'all good. I'm confident in my ability to lose weight, and my ability to recognise when I should maybe go on a week or two detox.

I find the best way to lose weight is to be realistic yet optimistic. I don't expect quick fixes and try not to pressure myself about it. Its more about lifestyle for me; changing bad habits and keeping myself occupied so I don't eat through boredom. Like eating a whole packet of bacon today (still, I made up for some of it with some minor exercise carrying wooden pallets and planks around town).

I occasionally do the workout pictured. At first I could only do half 1 set (with a 2 day recovery, my body was fucked), then after about 3 attempts at that I managed 2 sets. Now I've got kind of bored of it so I try and do the whole 30 reps in one set (combining some, like the pushups/plank leg raises. Get it over with quickly, you know?), about which I currently get halfway through. I try these workouts irregularly, sometimes with considerable gaps between one and the next, yet I still notice improvement. Honestly, if you only do it once now then again in a week or so, you'll notice it easier the second time. Imagine doing that 4 times a week, eating roast veg and maybe a Chinese at the weekend. You'll lose your shit in no time.

>> No. 4161 Anonymous
10th January 2017
Tuesday 9:28 pm
4161 spacer
Bicyclelad here again.

I've lost eight pounds since I started doing exercise and eating less. My stomach is visibly shrinking, and my upper body muscles appear slightly more toned (I do a fair bit of weight lifting at the gym again now).

One of my coworkers has commented on my improving physical shape... she told me she's happy for me, and that "a dadbod isn't a good look for somebody who isn't even a dad yet".

I am not sure whether to take this as an insult, or just an attempt at wry humour. Wish I could have said something to her like "look who's talking"... unfortunately, she is the fittest person at the office. She's 31 and has the slender body of an 18-year-old. She does jiu jitsu and zumba. And loads of it, from the way she looks. Her husband is a lucky man. and because she's married, all I can do is think about her firm buttocks while spaffing off
>> No. 4172 Anonymous
9th February 2017
Thursday 7:31 pm
4172 spacer
I hate myself every day for putting on a lot of the weight that I worked so hard to lose, and as I sit here right now I can feel my blubber on this shirt, yet for months I haven't been able to get motivated in the slightest to do anything about it.

I did it for 3 years, and I don't know how. Any tips?
>> No. 4173 Anonymous
9th February 2017
Thursday 8:23 pm
4173 spacer

I have a memory shed in which I store mental images of things that motivate me. Mostly it's women who won't fuck me while I'm ugly.
>> No. 4174 Anonymous
9th February 2017
Thursday 8:25 pm
4174 spacer

>> No. 4175 Anonymous
9th February 2017
Thursday 9:19 pm
4175 spacer
I'm too autistic to fuck anyone. Nothing motivates me. Much like the current lad in /emo/, nothing is interesting or motivational. I finish my current soul-destroying job in August, thank fuck, but I need something to stop me from drinking every night until then.
>> No. 4176 Anonymous
9th February 2017
Thursday 9:24 pm
4176 spacer
Drink spirits. They have less calories.
>> No. 4177 Anonymous
9th February 2017
Thursday 9:57 pm
4177 spacer

One step ahead of you, lad. I usually have vodka and sugar free squash/cordial.
>> No. 4178 Anonymous
9th February 2017
Thursday 10:59 pm
4178 spacer
I never drunk any alcohol. Is it nice? Beer smells like vomit.
>> No. 4179 Anonymous
9th February 2017
Thursday 11:02 pm
4179 spacer

Beer's basically fine. I only drink it front of other people so they don't think I'm mental (any more so, at least).
>> No. 4180 Anonymous
10th February 2017
Friday 8:27 am
4180 spacer
I've found this. For some reason drinking lots of beer is fine but ordering a pint of vodka crosses some kind of line.
>> No. 4181 Anonymous
10th February 2017
Friday 9:18 am
4181 spacer
I don't drink beer at all, I can't stand the taste. I prefer a decent cider (as in a proper one).

If you have never drunk before and want to try it, I'd recommend some wine that isn't all that cheap to start with, since it's actually a nice experience and you can't taste any alcohol. My personal recommendation would be Viña Tondonia Reserva (It's a Rioja, red). It's ~£20 a bottle but worth it I'd say.

The other option, of course, is to get that cheap 'fruit cider' shite, which has never seen cider in its life, but it's like really sweet fizzy pop.
>> No. 4182 Anonymous
10th February 2017
Friday 10:04 am
4182 spacer
What planet are you from?
>> No. 4183 Anonymous
10th February 2017
Friday 10:34 am
4183 spacer
Your mother.
>> No. 4341 Anonymous
2nd October 2017
Monday 12:57 am
4341 spacer
I'm doing a fairly intense burn at the moment to try lose weight, I have bastardised the diet plan in >>3974 mostly, but I am significantly lighter. I am a bloke 168cm and weigh 70kg and 20% body fat bmi 25, my goal is about 63-65kg and down to the low teens in body fat (maybe 13%) I want to be light for rock climbing, I used to do it a bit and I don't think I could go back to it feeling like I was too fat to hold myself comfortably upside down.

My diet consists of 2 sweet potatoes a day and free feeding myself a chilli that is largely beef rib I batch cooked. But Monday I am switching to largely pure beef mince (probably 500g per day).

My current exercise is 2 30 min Elliptical sessions a day everyday with occasional chin ups.

My question is thus; Do I need a protein shake? If I do what sort of protein shake? Can I get smaller sample packets from somewhere instead of tubs to try first? The last time I was using powder I had the norovirus and my brain made the association and I gagged every time I tried to go back to it, that was a few years ago, but I'd like to make sure that doesn't happen before I blow £30 on a tub.
>> No. 4342 Anonymous
2nd October 2017
Monday 1:21 am
4342 spacer

You're getting more than enough protein from the beef.
>> No. 4343 Anonymous
2nd October 2017
Monday 3:36 am
4343 spacer
Please don't eat red meat every day. It'll slowly do a number on your digestive system.
>> No. 4344 Anonymous
2nd October 2017
Monday 11:27 am
4344 spacer
>Please don't eat red meat every day. It'll slowly do a number on your digestive system.

Well I've been doing it pretty much every day for the last 30 years without issue so I think I'll take my chances hippy lad. I'll accept there is a suggested correlation with heart disease risk, but practically every study into the negative effects of red meat seems to be by a vegetarian/ vegan who is either willingly or unintentionally compromises their data that is contradicted by a later study with a larger sample without a bag of spuds.

Talking about which foods are healthy and unhealthy seems the equivalent of soothsaying at this point in history with every study contradicting every other study and you end up just cherry-picking the studies that agree with what you were going to do anyway.

As long as something isn't demonstrably poison I'll take my chances.
>> No. 4345 Anonymous
2nd October 2017
Monday 11:29 am
4345 spacer
>bag of spuds

What a weird word filter.
>> No. 4346 Anonymous
3rd October 2017
Tuesday 9:21 pm
4346 spacer
The Withings (now Nokia?) was a bit rich for my blood.

I spent £30 on a Xiaomi Mi Scale 2 and I'm super pleased with it. Does pretty much everything the Withings does but for a third the cost.

The app is a bit shit, but it syncs nicely with Apple Health so it's no big deal.

Xiaomi also make a wristband fitness tracker that's £25 and does steps, heartbeat, notifications, all that shit. Highly recommended too!
>> No. 4347 Anonymous
3rd October 2017
Tuesday 9:23 pm
4347 spacer
> You can always just say you're proudly sporting a dad bod... that's kind of fashionable at the moment...
Works until the cholesterol and obesity catch up with me and give me a crippling heart-attack in 25 years time.
>> No. 4348 Anonymous
3rd October 2017
Tuesday 9:28 pm
4348 spacer

This is me. What a fat cunt I've become.
6'1", 33, weighed 10st ±1st for nearly 20 years until I lost my job as I was turning 30. Beef has piled on since then.

Target is ~11½st (160lb-ish). I've got a fuck load of work to do.
>> No. 4349 Anonymous
4th October 2017
Wednesday 11:32 am
4349 spacer
first time seeing this thread so I'm just going to make a general post about it.

I have been struggling with my weight for a long time now and I had achieved some goal by going to slimming world for a year. I got down from 20st to 16st. I hadn't felt so good for a long time and I could fit into 36" trousers, coming from 44" is astounding. But, as things are to do, I left my current job to another and consequently suffered from stress for the first time. Now I only realize this looking back, if I had realized then I might have done something about it. but in the end, they sacked me. And I was happy about it. They were all looking at me to be kicking off about it but I just started laughing. that confused them, I'm getting off point. during the 5 months of my tenure, I put on 4 stone and gone back up to 20 and I haven't been able to shift it. I've tried the gym but couldn't keep up with it. I think I'm depressed, I just can't keep up with anything. I have seen the doctor and been prescribed antidepressants but have decided not to take them as the side effects are pretty horrendous. so I've left it at that. I think maybe the depression is from my weight and the near constant pain in my back, neck and legs. All weight related. I've also considered intermittent fasting, that's supposed to work for some people. I just haven't found something for me. I just need to stop being so lazy, I just don't know how.
>> No. 4350 Anonymous
4th October 2017
Wednesday 8:50 pm
4350 spacer
Oh lad. Talk to us some more.
>> No. 4352 Anonymous
5th October 2017
Thursday 4:15 pm
4352 spacer
>>4350 I'm full of stories of hapless fuckwittery. Me to start with and then my apprentices and then the stupid customers. Engineering it's a strange thing.
>> No. 4353 Anonymous
6th October 2017
Friday 9:37 pm
4353 spacer

This diet is working shockingly fast and well. I'm concerned I'm shedding muscle mass because I'm coming down absurdly quickly. A fair bit more than a kg a week, any suggestions to make sure the weight is coming off the right places? My work out performance is lower than before but that's probably the lack of glucose.
>> No. 4354 Anonymous
6th October 2017
Friday 10:23 pm
4354 spacer
>any suggestions to make sure the weight is coming off the right places?
If you're asking if there is a way to control the area of your body from which you are losing fat, no that's impossible.
>> No. 4355 Anonymous
6th October 2017
Friday 11:18 pm
4355 spacer

No I mean to make sure I'm losing fat not muscle.
>> No. 4356 Anonymous
7th October 2017
Saturday 10:56 am
4356 spacer

A kilo of fat is about 3500kcals, so it's feasible to lose a kilo a week if you're working at it. If you want to check that you're not losing muscle, you'll need calipers or an electronic body fat analyser.
>> No. 4357 Anonymous
7th October 2017
Saturday 11:09 am
4357 spacer

You seem to be confusing the calorie count of a kilo with that of a pound. A Kilo of fat is about 7700 Kcal. I'm not really asking how do I measure where the weight is coming off from, I'm more asking if there is a method to prevent Muscle loss while lossing fat?
>> No. 4358 Anonymous
7th October 2017
Saturday 12:08 pm
4358 spacer

Isn't that what working out is for? You keep at it with excercise to ensure you build muscle at the same time as your diet sheds the fat?
>> No. 4359 Anonymous
8th October 2017
Sunday 12:35 pm
4359 spacer

thin privilege.jpg
I put on weight, 6 foot and 14 stone up to 17 due to prescription opiates and it made my pain worse so I had to take them more regularly. I stopped taking them on Friday after cutting it back in stages and the diarrhoea has been horrific and I've lost weight already, which is good but weight loss wont solve all my problems.

I think my pain was originally due to lack of fitness, so I need to crawl my way back while Jonesing for hill-billy heroin and in a not inconsiderable amount of agony and I honestly have no idea where to start.
>> No. 4360 Anonymous
9th October 2017
Monday 4:09 pm
4360 spacer
Why do my legs hurt the day after running? Is it that I didn't warm up properly? Or didn't stretch afterwards?
>> No. 4361 Anonymous
9th October 2017
Monday 4:12 pm
4361 spacer
>> No. 4362 Anonymous
11th October 2017
Wednesday 9:53 am
4362 spacer
So it seems I can reduce the DOMs by drinking some powerade afterwards. I'll try that.
>> No. 4363 Anonymous
11th October 2017
Wednesday 2:52 pm
4363 spacer
The original recipe of Gatorade is apparently the best stuff ever for recovery, unfortunately Pepsi own the copyright and use the name to produce sugary shit that is less useful but more popular taste with the masses. I don't have a problem with consumer choice, corporations, and copyright/trademark law apart from that they are directly stifling a virtuous product.
>> No. 4364 Anonymous
11th October 2017
Wednesday 4:59 pm
4364 spacer
40kg snatch has been achieved and smashed out the fuckin' park as of this morning so let's fuckin ave ya you caaaaaaants
>> No. 4492 Anonymous
22nd April 2018
Sunday 12:35 pm
4492 spacer

I can't stop eating, lads

I lost 35kg, and it's all coming back

I'll fight it a little but then

I eat when I'm not hungry
and I know I'm not hungry

but I eat anyway
>> No. 4493 Anonymous
22nd April 2018
Sunday 1:23 pm
4493 spacer
I started a keto diet 30 days ago and I've gone from 94kg to 88kg since then, and that's with about 6 cheat days where travel persuaded me to have beer and carby food. I combined it with cutting back a bit on the heavy drinking and started doing some modest exercise again (just some benchpressing and pullups/chinups), but when I've tried those things in the past without keto I didn't lose anywhere near as much weight, so this ketogenic dieting thing seems to be legit.
>> No. 4494 Anonymous
23rd April 2018
Monday 12:24 pm
4494 spacer
Insofar as it helps you lose weight, yes. It doesn't help you keep it off when you hit your goal wieght and get lazy, though.

How it works is by inducing ketogenesis, by exhausting your carb reserves, your body starts to devour itself. You can achieve this by fasting too, which has better long term results. "Keto" is just a rebranded atkins diet.
>> No. 4495 Anonymous
23rd April 2018
Monday 12:53 pm
4495 spacer

The crucial difference with keto is it's far simpler, without the 'phases' of different carb intakes Atkins has. You just eat under 50g ish of carbs a day and hope for the best. It definitely works, and I think people get very evangelical about it because you never really feel like you're on a diet, such is the satiating nature of a high fat and protein diet. I think a lot of people on it tend to just stay on it. I bet you go mental if you start eating carbs again after a dramatic stretch on abstinence.

I sort of accidentally have a keto diet as I don't like starchy food, or bread, or sweet stuff. I feel fine. I also have non-deliberately been doing 16/8 intermittent fasting for years because of work, so I have no useful data.
>> No. 4523 Anonymous
10th June 2018
Sunday 6:40 pm
4523 spacer

I've been using an app recently for core training. Which seems pretty great as an exercise program the thing that bothers me is that it regularly says I've burned 500+ calories in 15- 20 minutes of exercise. This seems far too high to me. Is this remotely accurate? My muscles ache like crazy after but I don't see how this is possible. I'm 5'6 and about 145- 150 pounds (high end of healthy bmi) if that helps people assess if this is accurate.
>> No. 4524 Anonymous
10th June 2018
Sunday 7:24 pm
4524 spacer

>Is this remotely accurate?

Typically, no, not in the slightest. Even my garmin system which measures my heart rate, knows my VO2 max and my HR zones and all that, and it still thinks I burn 400 calories on a 15 minute walk to the shops.

I still use calories burned as a relative measure of my own personal effort from day to day, but I don't pay attention to the actual numbers it throws out.
>> No. 4525 Anonymous
10th June 2018
Sunday 7:35 pm
4525 spacer

The thing that confuses me is what would the gain be in reporting such inaccurate numbers? Is this like vanity sizing and people like exercise programs that tell them they burned more even if it isn't true.
>> No. 4526 Anonymous
10th June 2018
Sunday 7:44 pm
4526 spacer

For something like an exercise routine, I could see the logic in making out that their routine burns so many calories, yeah.

But it seems that Garmins and Fitbits and gym machines seem to all estimate on the high end too, which doesn't really make much sense, unless it's also just to make people feel better. I just try not to worry about it. I'd love to actually know for real how many calories I burn, but it's not exactly easy to measure even in a proper lab, so I just don't really worry about it.
>> No. 4527 Anonymous
10th June 2018
Sunday 11:08 pm
4527 spacer

I has to be including your BMR in that 400 and you have to be a hell of a fat cunt, or it's broken.
>> No. 4528 Anonymous
11th June 2018
Monday 2:30 am
4528 spacer

I'm not fat (anymore) at all, and it's as consistent as every other method I've used. I think it's because I have a higher heart rate than most.
>> No. 4529 Anonymous
11th June 2018
Monday 5:13 pm
4529 spacer

Unless you're failing finger sized rails of gak before popping to the shops (don't worry we've all been there) there's no way your heart rate should be that high. I'm 110kg, I know the treadmill I use takes my weight and BMR over exercise time into account when calculating its calorie total and yet it takes me me almost an hour of walking at 4.5 KM/H at a 4% incline to burn close to that number of calories.
>> No. 4530 Anonymous
12th June 2018
Tuesday 3:50 am
4530 spacer

It's cos my resting heart rate is about 90.
>> No. 4531 Anonymous
12th June 2018
Tuesday 4:49 am
4531 spacer

Mate is that a RHR taken when you're sitting in bed after waking up after a good night's kip or a "RHR" taken at fuck knows when after a day of caffeine, commuting, steak fucking bakes and god knows what else?

No one should be waking up with a RHR of 90 unless you're really making waves as a next generation pharmacological power user / using K Cider as your bedtime tipple or have some kind of serious heart issue. (Obviously I fucking hope it's not the second one as you haven't mentioned anything of that kind but Jesus lad, if your RHR is 90 standing up and going to the fridge is basically sending you into tachycardia. Go see a fucking doctor, sharpish).
>> No. 4534 Anonymous
12th June 2018
Tuesday 4:59 am
4534 spacer
It's from actual rest.

>Go see a fucking doctor

I've seen plenty of doctors. It's fine, apparently. It's definitely about 90. Blood pressure is great, too. Post surgery a few years ago I was sat at 125 while lying in bed, and also on morphine. (no, really) They were checking my vitals every hour or so and did a couple of EKGs and nobody was particularly concerned. I was pretty fucking concerned, to be honest, but I was told it was high but not unusual, especially considering my normal RHR was already high.

I haven't done drugs in about six years and I don't drink, or have anxiety or a bad heart or anything. I'm 'healthy but a bit odd' according to medical professionals.
>> No. 4535 Anonymous
12th June 2018
Tuesday 5:29 am
4535 spacer

Well if you've done echos and EKGs and a treadmill stress test and nothing worrying came up who's a random prick on the internets to say otherwise? Cholesterol and blood pressure being good is good news, maybe get your triglycerides and most importantly your homocysteine levels checked (just badger your gp until they sign the damn bloodwork papers).

If those all check out then I guess your ticker just likes to tick a little bit faster than normal.

Apologetic regards, concerned fellow shed enthusiast and amateur PhD in pseudo-drugs from the university of I read it on the internet.
>> No. 4689 Anonymous
26th October 2018
Friday 7:22 pm
4689 spacer
I've been back to eating refined carbs for a few weeks after losing 15kg on four months of keto and it's staggering how hungry I feel all the time now.

I'm going go to back to keto and investigate a cyclic keto diet so I can binge drink on the weekends. I never really missed carby food when I was on the diet but I did miss beer, so maybe I can have my cake and eat it too.
>> No. 4751 Anonymous
8th February 2019
Friday 4:31 pm
4751 spacer
Just seen a photo of me from last night. As the GenZ yute would say, "big oof".

It's easy to justify that you're not that big, but photos don't lie.

MyFitnessPal, here we go.
>> No. 4752 Anonymous
8th February 2019
Friday 4:37 pm
4752 spacer
Intermittent fasting is working pretty well for me at the moment. If you can do all your eating in an ~8 hour window from say midday to 8pm then you should just start shedding weight gradually. You will be pretty hungry in the mornings, but the upside is you don't really need to watch what you are eating.
>> No. 4753 Anonymous
8th February 2019
Friday 4:50 pm
4753 spacer
That's my general way of eating - I usually overdo it when I do eat.

I lost 40kg before, and by the looks of it I've put most of it back on. Annoying but I've been eating like a fucking pig so what can I expect?
>> No. 4755 Anonymous
9th February 2019
Saturday 10:32 am
4755 spacer
> MyFitnessPal

If you stick religiously to it (ie really recording what you eat and drink) for a couple of weeks, it becomes easily habit forming and works well. It's worth paying for..

I think most people do that - again I found MyFitnessPal useful when I actually weighed some of the portions and found out how many calories I was eating, rather than the "average" sized portions you read about.
>> No. 4756 Anonymous
9th February 2019
Saturday 10:50 am
4756 spacer

That's been my issue for about 3 years. When I was losing the weight the first time, I was sticking to it absolutely religiously. Then, I stopped, and getting back into it is brutally hard, especially as I don't have anything in my life resembling routine.
>> No. 4757 Anonymous
9th February 2019
Saturday 11:21 am
4757 spacer

I too have no real routine, the best thing I've found for sticking to a healthy diet is just basically any amount of exercise. Even 20 minutes of jogging or cycling or even walking every couple of days and I stay in that 'fitness' mindset and I'm far, far less likely to forget my MFP logging or want to eat an entire cake etc.
>> No. 4758 Anonymous
9th February 2019
Saturday 1:46 pm
4758 spacer
Does anyone here have any experience with weight loss surgery?
>> No. 4759 Anonymous
9th February 2019
Saturday 3:13 pm
4759 spacer
I've cut it out entirely, mate, and the pounds are falling away.
>> No. 4760 Anonymous
21st February 2019
Thursday 9:07 pm
4760 spacer
MFP that good? I've thought about it but my laziness gets in the way.
>> No. 4761 Anonymous
21st February 2019
Thursday 9:50 pm
4761 spacer
I think it's really good - worth the 30 quid. I learned a lot about how many actual calories are in the meals I eat and once you get past the first couple of days and have figured out how to record what you eat, it's very easy to use.
>> No. 4762 Anonymous
20th March 2019
Wednesday 8:53 pm
4762 spacer
Lads I need some advice.

Last year was pretty bad, all sorts of shit happened which left me with no motivation and Saturdays were just spent drinking quite a lot into the early hours, mainly through boredom but also habit, though non addictive. I gave up exercise which I enjoyed and wallowed in my slovenly ways.
Anyhow, this led to weight gain which turned into a vicious cycle of not giving a fuck and settling into the life of a fatlad, accepting being in my mid 40's that the extra pounds is just a part of what happens. Nothing drastic, probably 2/3 stone over my ideal healthy weight from about 3 years ago but still out of shape.
At the end of this year I realised I had to change what I was doing - taking the lazy easy path which leads to nihilisim and despair. I saw Tyson Fury come back after being a right fat bastard and thought if he can do it, so can I. The choice that can be made - take the easy route and get blackout drunk every weekend and try to forget, or take the hard route and become or do something good.
I've stopped drinking since January, not because I'm an alcoholic, just that I was drinking too much and getting fat due to the extra calories, all the shit you eat alongside this, fryups to kill hangovers, pizzas as too drunk to cook etc. I'm back into healthy eating, high protein foods, no junk food, fruit, veg (I've had chocolate about 3 times this year) etc. The thing is that I've been putting a lot of effort in but I can't seem to see that I'm losing much weight over the past 3 months.
Exercise wise I've calculated that I am burning around 7000 calories a week. This is based on cycling 70 miles and gym sessions. Roughly 1000 calories lost per day through the cycling / gym session and 2000 calories lost per week through not drinking or eating shit. Gym session is usually 20 mins on a cross trainer at 130/140 bpm at high resistance and 20 minutes of weights set at 10 x 3 reps per muscle group. I'd say this would lose 2lbs per week.
The thing is would have expected at the very least to have lost around 1 to 1.5 stone by now but I just don't feel like the weight is coming off as I would have expected. I'm getting more defined and toned from the weights but the beergut is a total bastard to remove. I'm looking forward to a beer or 2 by Easter but my goal is to shed the flab before I can take my reward and learn from the hard work it took to get to there. I'll get there eventually but at this point I feel it's going to take forever before I can wear a fitted shirt again.
>> No. 4763 Anonymous
20th March 2019
Wednesday 10:27 pm
4763 spacer
Don't look at weight lost or gained or BMI. Look at your body fat percentage. When you start exercising and dieting, you will quickly get noticeable gains. As your body adjusts it becomes the new normal, so you nee to start increasing the weights on your reps or increasing the reps, if you're not looking to get hench.

Don't forget that a cubic inch of muscle weighs more than a cubic inch of fat. Also you'll get weight fluctuations through how much fluid you've intaken and also how much salt is in your diet will effect you're fluid retention. Don't look at the scales look at the mirror, if you're losing weight, your trousers are getting looser and youre feeling better keep on doing it.
>> No. 4764 Anonymous
20th March 2019
Wednesday 11:09 pm
4764 spacer
Buy the Garmin/Withings scales - they're not too expensive, work with wifi and the app is really good. As >>4763 says, you should try and track body fat/muscle/water percentage, every day at the same time (I do first thing in the morning before the shower) - if you're into it, as you seem to be, you'll benefit greatly from the feedback.
>> No. 4765 Anonymous
20th March 2019
Wednesday 11:52 pm
4765 spacer
Those scales look really good, I have been on a keto diet for the past 18 months. Along with improving my diet, I have been hitting the gym 3-4 days a week. I have only dropped about 4 stone, but gone from a 40 inch waist to a 34 waist. I have some "smart" scales, but they are a bit irregular. They say that my body fat percentage has gone up after going for a piss, so I will have to invest in some better ones.
>> No. 4767 Anonymous
21st March 2019
Thursday 12:55 am
4767 spacer

>They say that my body fat percentage has gone up after going for a piss, so I will have to invest in some better ones.

All of them are based on the same technology, which is just putting a current though you and measuring your resistance. I wouldn't expect fancier ones to be that much more accurate, as being more or less dehydrated will always effect that.
>> No. 4768 Anonymous
21st March 2019
Thursday 8:00 am
4768 spacer
I know the technology will be the same, but he software and hardware is going to be better. That just means better, more accurate results. Plus the addition of a tracking app where I won't have to have to manually input everything is a bonus.
>> No. 4770 Anonymous
21st March 2019
Thursday 4:12 pm
4770 spacer

The app makes it worth the money, for sure, regardless of whether the accuracy is better or not. I still don't think they'll be any better, for the same reason almost nobody needs to spend more than twenty quid on a multimeter.

I patiently await your appraisal, though, I'd be happy to be wrong, as I quite fancy a set of the Garmin ones.
>> No. 4771 Anonymous
21st March 2019
Thursday 5:01 pm
4771 spacer
It's payday tomorrow, so I'm going to order this one. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Withings-Nokia-Body-Wi-Fi-Scale/dp/B0728K4371/ref=olp_product_details?_encoding=UTF8&me=
>> No. 4772 Anonymous
21st March 2019
Thursday 5:25 pm
4772 spacer

Those ones don't do the bodyfat stuff, just in case you didn't notice. They just do weight (and BMI because presumably you just tell it how tall you are)
>> No. 4773 Anonymous
21st March 2019
Thursday 6:24 pm
4773 spacer
That'll be why it was 30 quid cheaper than the next ones up. The ones I have only cost me about 25 notes, but as I said it seems to rather inaccurate.
>> No. 4774 Anonymous
21st March 2019
Thursday 7:49 pm
4774 spacer
That's exactly the one I have (actually I have two, an older one too) - it's really good.
>> No. 4775 Anonymous
21st April 2019
Sunday 2:17 pm
4775 spacer
I'm back up to my starting weight.

40 fucking kilos, 20 of which I've put on since October.

I'm such a miserable fucking useless cunt.
>> No. 4776 Anonymous
21st April 2019
Sunday 2:52 pm
4776 spacer
Christmas, shortage of daylight and cold weather does that lad.
Don't give up.
>> No. 4777 Anonymous
21st April 2019
Sunday 3:25 pm
4777 spacer
Why do we fall, Bruce?

What you've shown is that you can lose that weight, and you know what it takes, both to lose it and to gain it. Use this experience.
>> No. 4778 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 2:43 am
4778 spacer
I'm just consumed (pun intended) by an all-encompassing apathy. I know I'm a disgusting, lumbering hamplanet, but I can't bring myself to do anything about it. It crosses my mind several times a day, and for the past few nights I've gone to sleep just fucking hating what I've become. Still, I eat. I just don't have the willpower to track calories or take the hour-long round trip to the nearest gym.

For months now I've said "well I'll be able to REALLY get on it after $milestone", but I never do.

I hate that none of my clothes fit any more, but apparently I don't hate it enough.

Once a fat fuck, always a fat fuck I guess.
>> No. 4779 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 2:54 am
4779 spacer
>>4778 cont'd

I know this is veering into /emo/ territory here but I suppose the first go round, I lost all that weight because I thought it would solve my problems, or at least help. When I got there, 2kg from my target weight, I found that it didn't.

Now, I have no motivation. Sure, there are the obvious health benefits, but I simply do not respect myself enough to care. I don't like being a fat fuck but I also don't like being me.
>> No. 4780 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 3:02 am
4780 spacer
You could literally be running about outside in the rain right now like a mad one, if you wanted, and assuming it's also raining round your end of Ossett.

Don't think of being healthy like you're marching the Grande Armee into Russia or switching from analogue to digital. Do it bit-by-bit, make it an ongoing process and not one you can "fail" because unless you're dead you really haven't.
>> No. 4781 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 3:16 am
4781 spacer
Unfortunately, despite the new b&m, I'm not presently there. I'd rather not be running through the streets of suburban Manchester though.

It's not that I don't know how to make lifestyle changes, I just can't seem to stick to them. Even the first time, it never got easier and I never felt like I was anything but a fatty pretending to be healthy -- I was right.

I try and walk 10,000 steps a day, and cycle when I can. I just wish, fucking wish that I could be like a normal person and not have to constantly battle myself to exhaustion to not be a fat piece of shit.
>> No. 4782 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 9:12 am
4782 spacer


It's common to feel how you do. The hard part isn't doing the run, the hard part is doing it regularly and sticking to it.

I've not been following the thread, nor your posts so sorry if the obvious has been stated but if you can just get yourself to do a little, every other day, you can take it from there.
>> No. 4783 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 6:02 pm
4783 spacer
I lost a lot of weight with the keto diet. A smattering of exercise to tone up -- nothing intense -- but absolutely no calorie counting. No carbs is no junk food. Try it for a week.
>> No. 4784 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 6:02 pm
4784 spacer
I lost a lot of weight with the keto diet. A smattering of exercise to tone up -- nothing intense -- but absolutely no calorie counting. No carbs is no junk food. Try it for a week.
>> No. 4785 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 6:05 pm
4785 spacer
Doesn't ketosis take 2 weeks to kick in?
>> No. 4786 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 6:13 pm
4786 spacer
Just looked it up. Two days, apparently. Fair enough, might give it a go.
>> No. 4787 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 6:24 pm
4787 spacer

Two or three days. A lot of people say you'll suffer flu like symptoms for up to two weeks at the start, but personally I never have.
>> No. 4788 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 10:14 pm
4788 spacer
You may not lose weight for the first few weeks, but it's enough to get a taste of what the diet is like.
>> No. 4789 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 10:19 pm
4789 spacer
I don't think I entered ketosis until a month had passed, and I went "cold turkey". I monitored with keto urine sticks. It's a gradual process, but I'd expect longer than 2 weeks for most people.
>> No. 4790 Anonymous
6th May 2019
Monday 10:34 pm
4790 spacer

You don't store a month of carbohydrates in your body, you will be in ketosis within 24 hours realistically, if you don't eat any carbs. Everyone is different but under 20g per day of carbs seems to be the magic number that all but guarantees ketosis. It might take much longer for you body to get 'adapted' to this new process, but as the liver can only store about 100g of glycogen, it does not take very long at all to end up in ketosis. It might well take a few weeks before you 'feel' any different, but biologically you'll burn the last of your excess carbs within a day or two.

For the record those keto urine strips aren't particuarly useful as they don't measure nutritionally correlated ketones, the only way to do this is with a blood ketone meter.
>> No. 4791 Anonymous
31st May 2019
Friday 3:34 am
4791 spacer
Why can't I fucking stop shoving shit into my fat fucking face? Why can't I be normal?
>> No. 4792 Anonymous
31st May 2019
Friday 9:47 am
4792 spacer

Look around you m8, that is normal. The thin people are the weirdos.
>> No. 4793 Anonymous
31st May 2019
Friday 10:37 am
4793 spacer

If you look at the statistics, you are normal.
>> No. 4794 Anonymous
31st May 2019
Friday 11:45 am
4794 spacer
Normal people don't look at statistics.
>> No. 4795 Anonymous
31st May 2019
Friday 1:15 pm
4795 spacer
Statistically speaking this is questionable.

Did I already do my "dumb cave person" bit in this thread? Regardless, it's because your brain's still the same organ that had people chasing mammoths off cliffs tens of thousands of years ago, so when it sees two pieces of chicken and chips or a pack choc-ices it's beside itself with joy. It's very difficult to overcome those baser instincts, and we have to artificially train ourselves to do certain "unnatural" things and that's hard. Especially, as it sounds like from the tone of your posts,if you're attempting to do these things on your todd by opting for "staring at a wall and being annoyed" instead of eating. Not to mindlessly parley a meme but perhabs joining something like Slimming World might help, as people often learn better in groups and what you're doing is essentially learning not to overeat.

This is a very smug and presumptuous post I'll probably regret later so I'm ending it here, for all our sakes.
>> No. 4796 Anonymous
31st May 2019
Friday 2:07 pm
4796 spacer
Told you before m8, cut the carbs. Blanket rule. Try it for 3 weeks.
>> No. 4833 Anonymous
1st September 2019
Sunday 6:36 pm
4833 spacer
I promised myself I'd never let myself get this fat again. Get so disgustingly, gluttonously, repulsively fat that I can no longer find clothes that fit me in shops and I can feel my legs chafing with every laboured step I take.

But here I am, and I feel powerless to do anything about it. The last 3 months of my life has been me getting back on it for a week, logging my calories (1500 a day), never drinking or indulging in a snack, but I always fall off. I always go back to shoving my disgusting, blubbery face. I know I'm doing it; I'm not in denial by any means. I just completely lack the drive and self-control I had to lose the weight the first time. It's not even like I go out and come back with sweets or chocolate or cake - I can't remember the last time I had any of the above. I just can't stop myself when it comes to portion control. An extra slice of bread here, a sausage roll there.

It's a nasty cycle too. Being a waddling fucking landwhale makes me sad, and the only coping methods I have involve plenty of calories.

Why can't I just not be me?
>> No. 4834 Anonymous
1st September 2019
Sunday 7:45 pm
4834 spacer

I think the conventional advice is to address the root causes of overeating, eliminating causes of stress and so on -- but beyond that, do you do any strenuous physical activity?

Going hard at the weights a couple of times a week has worked like a cheat code for me in terms of calories. It's what tipped me over to the more privileged (if more expensive) side of the calorie equation, where I'm struggling to cram enough in to keep up with the work. It's not as hard as it sounds, at all, but I accept it's not everyone's thing.
>> No. 4835 Anonymous
1st September 2019
Sunday 7:54 pm
4835 spacer

Addendum to this post: reading more closely I don't know if you're exaggerating or if you're genuinely a Very Big Lad, which would probably change the sort of exercise you can do to start with.

That said, I'll preach the virtues of resistance training (including machines and the like) until my dying breath, one of the major benefits being an "eating with purpose" mentality and generally getting the metabolism back on track.
>> No. 4836 Anonymous
1st September 2019
Sunday 8:13 pm
4836 spacer
> do you do any strenuous physical activity?
I have EDS (Hypermobility Type), which means anything load-bearing is not really an option. I weighed as much as I do now a few years ago, but one of the things that helped was cardio. Cardio, especially non-load bearing (so essentially bike and cross-trainer). I enjoy playing squash, but even when I can find people to play with, the impact on my knees puts me out of doing anything else other than walking for a few days.

> I don't know if you're exaggerating or if you're genuinely a Very Big Lad

BMI is 39. I am somewhat exaggerating; I'm still mobile and able to do pretty much everything, but I overflow train seats, some restaurant seating is painful, finding trousers that will go around my thighs is very difficult, and struggle to get between smallish gaps.

I lost the weight before, but I have no idea how I had the strength of will to do it. I cannot stay at it.
>> No. 4837 Anonymous
1st September 2019
Sunday 10:16 pm
4837 spacer

I know precisely fuck all about EDS so I can't speak with any authority on this, but I can speculate that a good PT (not just any old trainer but an experienced physiotherapist) who's willing to learn and work with you could make a world of difference.

Another thought of mine is maybe to ask what's changed in your circumstances that led you to drop the cardio? Additional stresses, time constraints, something else?

On a related note: if time was ever an issue for you in getting your cardio in, there's some pretty strong research out there showing you can drop a lot of weight and get fitter with an exercise bike with much shorter sessions if you gradually build yourself up to interval training.
>> No. 4838 Anonymous
1st September 2019
Sunday 11:34 pm
4838 spacer
Unfortunately, I can't afford anything like that.

>what's changed in your circumstances that led you to drop the cardio?

September 14th, 2016. A Very Bad Day, and after that point I no longer really lost weight. I maintained for a couple of years, with a slow creep up (about 10kg in two years), but have put on nearly 30 this year. I don't really know what changed other than I hate myself more than usual.


Not really an issue; I have a gym 10 minutes walk from where I live. When I did it back in the day, it was sort of 20/10/10 minute split between x-trainer, recumbent bike and standard bike. I did it most days and it worked. It's consistency, though. I can't do it. I can't keep it going.
>> No. 4839 Anonymous
2nd September 2019
Monday 6:29 am
4839 spacer

Is physiotherapy another one of those NHS services that's just non-existant for most people in terms of accessibility? I'd have thought with EDS and a sincere desire to lose weight that a GP would be very happy to refer you for free or subsidised sessions.
>> No. 4841 Anonymous
2nd September 2019
Monday 7:09 am
4841 spacer

Lad, I'd encourage you to think long term. You might feel fat and helpless but you're not.

It sounds like your biggest problem is insulin spikes and crashes from high-sugar foods (breads, sausage rolls, etc.) When your insulin crashes you feel shit, but it's also mostly why people are fat and hungry. You can eat as much as you want, it just has to be mostly vegetables. 2000 calories as mostly vegetables (by sheer volume of food) will leave nearly anyone full.

Again, often with dieting people make huge unsustainable choices- likely where you've had your successes in the past. If I were you, I'd slowly switch to a good whole food diet.

If the gym is too much for your right now, just add a bit of walking into your daily routine. As you, I wouldn't chuck myself into hour long gym visits because it might not last- that's not your fault, that's just how it is. Seldom can we handle such huge changes in lifestyle.

I think as well it's important for you to look at it properly. You're not sacrificing anything here: can you truly remember a divine sausage roll? Perhaps you can, but it's important to focus on the fact that you'll be looking and feeling much better. To round it off into a cliche thing- it's not "how will I cope without constantly shovelling big macs down my throat" to "how am I going to live feeling so much better"
>> No. 4842 Anonymous
2nd September 2019
Monday 11:05 am
4842 spacer

A lot of what you're saying echoes my own fatlad story.

It took me a long time to realise that I'm just not the type of person who can 'willpower' myself into doing something, and I'm not the sort of person who can do moderation. I can too easily convince myself that the two pizzas tonight will somehow launch me into a new diet tomorrow, and do the same the next day, and the next, etc until I've effectively forgotten that I want to lose weight for another week or so.

The inability to moderate is the easy bit, if you start thinking of food as addiction, which it definitely is for me. You can't just have 'a little bit' of crack, so similarly I stopped allowing myself to have 'just one' bag of crisps or whatever, because it's never, ever just one bag. One cheat is basically failure in my mind and an easy way to convince myself the attempt at a diet is over, and that's not even getting into the actual chemical addictive properties of high carb/fat snack foods.

So my method, as shaky as it was, was to wait for one of those rare moments of actual determined focus on losing weight (I suspect you're in one now too) and jump on it. Try to eat well, 'proper food', but cut out junk entirely. Eat as much as I can for the first week or two, as long as it's whole food, or at least not crisps, sweets, and takeaways. Then as I get used to that, I'd start counting the calories. It's all about getting into a routine, and being honest with yourself that the first couple of weeks will be hell and you'll feel fucking useless and powerless, but you're definitely not. You can definitely eat properly for a day, then two days, then three, then a week, then a month.

I also found improving my mental state and general living helped. Apparently people who exercise regularly crave fewer junk foods, and I find that to be true - even just purposely walking once a day puts me in a fitness mindset and I find it easier to resist my trigger foods. Keeping my house tidy, keeping on top of errands and chores, these were all things I wasn't doing while sitting on my arse eating 5000 calories so when I started doing them, my whole mindset slowly and subtley changed. I felt less like a piece of shit who deserved to wallow, and more like a normal person who happened to have put on a load of weight, and I think, even just typing it now, I realise that's the key to it for me. Whenever I've felt worthless, useless, pointless, it's oh so easy to allow yourself to abuse your body, because why the fuck not?

I'm sorry for the rambling, but I know exactly where you're coming from. My only practical advice would be to take one day at a time, and try to think about what might actually make you accountable. For me it was simply proving that I could fight my own shitty brain, it might be something else for you, but like the otherlad says, long term thinking is needed.
>> No. 4843 Anonymous
2nd September 2019
Monday 1:17 pm
4843 spacer
> Keeping my house tidy, keeping on top of errands and chores, these were all things I wasn't doing while sitting on my arse eating 5000 calories so when I started doing them, my whole mindset slowly and subtley changed.

This worked for me too somehow, despite for a bit different situation.
Regarding being a lard arse back in the day, I did will-power myself out of it. Mostly by cutting out junk food entirely, my only sort of exercise at that time was walking.
Sage because I didn't have a BMI of 39, so can't really advise you in any way, mate.
>> No. 4844 Anonymous
8th September 2019
Sunday 11:37 am
4844 spacer
>wait for one of those rare moments of actual determined focus on losing weight

Unfortunately I can never make it past the two week mark. I think that's the point where you can really keep the habit up, but I always slip after a few days. I think that's the worst thing - I spend hours a day intensely hating myself for how much of a disgusting fat cunt I let myself once again become, but somehow cannot channel that into, well, losing weight.
>> No. 4845 Anonymous
8th September 2019
Sunday 2:50 pm
4845 spacer

Different lad here, feel a bit apprehensive giving this advice as I'm not sure it's the right thing, but when I need to focus on a goal I often set my environment up so that the only real outlet I have is working towards that end.

When I noticed computer games were becoming a timesink from real life activities, I sold my consoles. When I realised I'd get drunk on my own as a way to cope with anxiety, I stopped buying alcohol to keep in the house. When I noticed I was getting frustrated and developing nervous tics, I placed trainers and kit next to the door so I could go to the gym immediately.

Don't know how well this would work for your compliance problem, but I think there's a lot to be said for structuring your choices in such a way that you have only a few good options.
>> No. 4846 Anonymous
8th September 2019
Sunday 10:46 pm
4846 spacer

Do you think you could set yourself a challenge of sorts? Like, go veggie for a month, or something like that. Changing your diet, but also deciding to just try to eat differently than you usually do, not necessarily better than you usually do, just different - might be enough to trick yourself into getting into a new habit?

I realise it's hard, but the more you resign yourself to never being able to hack it, you truly never will. You've done it before, you objectively can do it again.
>> No. 4881 Anonymous
18th December 2019
Wednesday 2:23 pm
4881 spacer
I'm now fat enough that i can't sit comfortably. I should probably just sow my fat fucking mouth shut. I weighed about 30kg less a year ago. Assuming 7000 excess calories per kg, that's a that's a total of 210,000 excess calories or 500 a day. Disgusting. I can barely look at myself. But hating yourself thin doesn't work, so I'm stuck.
>> No. 4882 Anonymous
18th December 2019
Wednesday 6:52 pm
4882 spacer

You ain't stuck lad, you just need to move a bit more and eat better. Note that I said eat better and not less.

Most of the fatties I know eat a lot of processed sugary* stuff (note that rice and white bread count as sugary) which leads to their blood sugar going up and down, creating 'false' hunger. Then you're in the mindset of sacrifice (giving up all those tasty big macs) and having to eat one dry ryvita a day, almost doomed to fail. It's quite similar to the trap that smokers fall into.

The point? 2,500 calories of carrots is very different (particularly in terms of volume) to 2500 calories of big macs; sure- you need to eat a deficit to lose weight, but what you eat makes that process heaven or hell. I don't think there's a person alive that could manage 2,500 calories worth of carrots in day, you'd probably feel sick after about 1,000 calories of them. Additionally, a lot of 'diet' foods tend to be quite bland-yet-sugary carbs.

Things I found easy were: no fizzy drinks or booze. One thing that helped me massively is eating a huge breakfast of oats with whole milk, fruit and nuts. I cook it into two portions and have it once at 6 and again at about 10. Oats don't fuck around, they keep you full and metabolise nice and slowly. I'd live on the damned stuff if I could (I can, I'm just not doing it).

For me, once I understood that the problem was more about things that 'sugar quickly' (i.e. not just cakes but breads and rice too) than about fat, my life got a lot easier and I found my weight easier to control.

*whole fruits are okay because the fibre helps dampen the effect on blood sugar, but fruit juices lack fibre.
>> No. 4983 Anonymous
14th January 2020
Tuesday 8:07 am
4983 spacer
Morning, chaps. 5:2ing it here, and it's proving weirdly easy. Obviously don't know if it's being successful yet(but it's hard to see why it wouldn't).
It's a thousand times easier just having fasting days than 'just eat less you fat knacker', as I'm not constantly ravenous.
Considering 4:3ing because why not.
Why not?
>> No. 4984 Anonymous
14th January 2020
Tuesday 2:02 pm
4984 spacer
2:5 rules even better - it’s amazing how quickly you get used to 800 calories.
>> No. 4988 Anonymous
19th January 2020
Sunday 8:01 pm
4988 spacer

Just finished 3 sets of 8 from the top row of this chart (minus pullups, i don't have a bar). Most were piss easy, but knowing that they would be is what made me actually consider doing them. It's a little sweat i wouldn't have produced otherwise, so all is good.

What do you think of these excersises? Missing any muscle groups?
>> No. 4990 Anonymous
22nd January 2020
Wednesday 4:59 pm
4990 spacer
>3 sets

try 10
>> No. 4992 Anonymous
22nd January 2020
Wednesday 5:05 pm
4992 spacer
>> No. 4994 Anonymous
22nd January 2020
Wednesday 9:43 pm
4994 spacer
I think because the top row are so easy they barely break a sweat.

The thing is, i find it very difficult to remain interested in performing a large number of easy exercises. 3 sets of 4-8, like the image suggests, is a great number to simply 'pick up and go' - There's no significant time commitment, yet you still feel it in your muscles when you're working from the upper limits of your strength.
I managed to pull a muscle or ligament while performing the 'Bulgarian split squats' for example, but it felt great and my legs got a good workout. So too did my arms during the 'pike pushups', and i can feel my abdomen and sides ache a little from the planks.

Exercise i wouldn'ty have got, so i'm happy.
>> No. 4995 Anonymous
22nd January 2020
Wednesday 11:53 pm
4995 spacer

Try it and feel the difference. You need to fatigue the muscle to stimulate growth. The muscle cells will grow bigger to store more energy to get you through the workout.
>> No. 5030 Anonymous
1st February 2020
Saturday 11:24 pm
5030 spacer
Fucks sake I just bought a Wattbike.
>> No. 5031 Anonymous
1st February 2020
Saturday 11:29 pm
5031 spacer


>> No. 5034 Anonymous
2nd February 2020
Sunday 2:30 pm
5034 spacer
Yeah but I am also really really tempted by one of these electric road bikes.
>> No. 5035 Anonymous
2nd February 2020
Sunday 2:40 pm
5035 spacer


Get a proper road bike and you too could have the magnificent physique of an elite athlete.
>> No. 5036 Anonymous
2nd February 2020
Sunday 3:23 pm
5036 spacer

>>5031 >>5034 >>5035
Recreationally inhaling car exhaust fumes is not proper cycling.
>> No. 5037 Anonymous
2nd February 2020
Sunday 3:26 pm
5037 spacer

That's you, that is.
>> No. 5038 Anonymous
2nd February 2020
Sunday 3:43 pm
5038 spacer
Pretty sure you'd be the one falling off at the hint of any bumps.
>> No. 5039 Anonymous
2nd February 2020
Sunday 4:43 pm
5039 spacer

I ride on these things that were especially designed to be good for cycling on; I believe they're called "roads".

>> No. 5040 Anonymous
2nd February 2020
Sunday 5:07 pm
5040 spacer
Face it mate: you're the type of person to go bowling with the gutters up.
>> No. 5041 Anonymous
2nd February 2020
Sunday 5:19 pm
5041 spacer

Your wife left you because she kept finding dirty sprockets in the bath and you had "XTR" engraved on your wedding ring.
>> No. 5042 Anonymous
2nd February 2020
Sunday 7:31 pm
5042 spacer


Road cycling is so much more dangerous than trail riding or proper MTB.

Anyway, you're all puffs.
>> No. 5043 Anonymous
2nd February 2020
Sunday 7:37 pm
5043 spacer


>> No. 5044 Anonymous
3rd February 2020
Monday 10:22 pm
5044 spacer

All roadies are bumders and need to learn how to ride properly.

>> No. 5045 Anonymous
3rd February 2020
Monday 11:27 pm
5045 spacer

That fat lump is out of breath going downhill and he didn't even have the decency to ride up. Also, he wouldn't last five minutes in the pro peloton without causing a giant pileup.

>> No. 5046 Anonymous
3rd February 2020
Monday 11:30 pm
5046 spacer


>All roadies are bumders

Just because a gentleman likes to wear skintight lycra, shaves his legs, spends all day bent double and finishes off with a vigorous lower-body massage, you assume he prefers to ride up the back roads. How very dare you!
>> No. 5047 Anonymous
3rd February 2020
Monday 11:47 pm
5047 spacer

Imagine the weight savings with a carbon buttplug instead of a saddle.
>> No. 5048 Anonymous
4th February 2020
Tuesday 8:37 am
5048 spacer
Only because he doesn't have a team of a dozen people to feed him banned drugs under the table.
>> No. 5049 Anonymous
4th February 2020
Tuesday 8:40 am
5049 spacer
As a roadie you might be unfamiliar with the so-called GoPro effect. Some of what you see in that video that you might think you could handle would certainly scare you off if you saw it in person. Cameras only tell lies in MTB.
>> No. 5050 Anonymous
4th February 2020
Tuesday 10:58 am
5050 spacer

I think most roadies have experienced a version of this, where you try to take a picture of an incline that you nearly lost a lung trying to climb, but it just looks almost entirely flat in the image.
>> No. 5051 Anonymous
4th February 2020
Tuesday 6:01 pm
5051 spacer
I think you give them too much credit. I'm sure most of them shy away from uphill inclines.
Monkey Dust - Cyclists.mp4
>> No. 5052 Anonymous
4th February 2020
Tuesday 8:11 pm
5052 spacer

>> No. 5053 Anonymous
4th February 2020
Tuesday 9:05 pm
5053 spacer

>> No. 5054 Anonymous
4th February 2020
Tuesday 9:51 pm
5054 spacer

go pro vs reality.jpg
>> No. 5055 Anonymous
4th February 2020
Tuesday 9:57 pm
5055 spacer

Needs big balls to do that, something you roadies lack from all that pudendal nerve damage and taint chafing.
>> No. 5056 Anonymous
4th February 2020
Tuesday 11:41 pm
5056 spacer
I must admit, that video is absolutely fucking mental. Every bit of it. But particularly the tree and rock sections. And the speed along the ridges. And the jumps fuck me the jumps.

I am old and jealous but thrilled watching it.
>> No. 5057 Anonymous
5th February 2020
Wednesday 12:24 am
5057 spacer
As someone who spent a lot of time in skate parks (albeit many, many years ago), the speed and the jumps don't bother me per se. All those fucking trees, though! And the generally uneven terrain and lack of visibility. Jesus. It'd be like riding a vert ramp with metal bars jutting up out of it for no good reason, only blindfolded.
>> No. 5058 Anonymous
5th February 2020
Wednesday 1:17 am
5058 spacer

Visibility is a lot better in real life, don't forget your eyeline will be 6 feet or more on a mountain bike.

Learning to react to the terrain is the whole point, of course.
>> No. 5059 Anonymous
9th February 2020
Sunday 3:46 pm
5059 spacer

the cyclists.jpg
As an impartial arbiter who has never held any interest in cycling, I can confirm that mountain biking looks like an exciting and challenging hobby for fun people while road cycling looks like an exercise in lycra-clad self-flagellation for office workers too dull to find the sort of girlfriend who'll perform all that genital torture they're secretly craving.
>> No. 5060 Anonymous
9th February 2020
Sunday 4:10 pm
5060 spacer

Nah m8. If you're reasonably fit, your bike is sorted and you've got a bit of sense, road cycling is gentle and almost effortless. You fall into a groove where your legs keep turning and the miles keep ticking over. It sounds bonkers, but you get to the point where you can go out for a 100 mile ride on a Sunday morning and still have loads of gas left in the tank.

Also roadie birds are much fitter than MTB birds.

>> No. 5061 Anonymous
9th February 2020
Sunday 4:27 pm
5061 spacer


Are jules does plenty of MTB too to be fair.

All the proper naughty ones also do track/crit cycling too mind. I'd list some names but it's a bit weird since I know quite a few of them.
>> No. 5248 Anonymous
12th July 2020
Sunday 9:27 am
5248 spacer

While I'm not doing all this optimised, I'm trying to lose weight.
I used a site to roughly calculate how many calories I need to eat to lose x amount every week.

My weight loss has been steady, losing 400-500g a week. That was just from dieting on calories in, no binging, no urges etc. For the past 2 weeks I've been doing 30 minutes on a rowing machine with a rest day here and there. The machine itself says I've burnt around 550 calories each session.

Now I realise I've probably built up some muscle which skews the scale reading and muscle is heavier than fat, but I was expecting more of a loss. If these were to carry on with no change then even with a calorie deficit and 30mins a day on the rower I'll only be losing 400g a week.

I exercise in the morning, a hour or 2 after breakfast, then have small lunch an hour or 2 after. Then have my dinner around 4-5pm.

The question that I'm getting to lads is. Once my muscle is built up, will my weight loss (on the scales) increase or is the fact I exercise in the day before having dinner just making my body take on the calories burnt so to speak, limiting my weight loss?

I'm not some gymrat or an exercise enthusiast so apologies if this is a simple or stupid question.
>> No. 5249 Anonymous
12th July 2020
Sunday 9:42 am
5249 spacer

Muscles need more energy to be maintained than fat, so you will burn more calories with more muscle. There is a balance point between eating too much to feed your muscles and not losing weight, and eating too little and losing muscle gains, but you will find that yourself.
>> No. 5250 Anonymous
12th July 2020
Sunday 9:51 am
5250 spacer

The increased muscle will increase your metabolism more than the same weight of fat.

You should consider water retention when losing weight. Which can throw you off by up to 2 kg this is an important factor to consider. You can feel like you are making no progress for weeks and then suddenly drop a KG overnight.
>> No. 5253 Anonymous
15th July 2020
Wednesday 9:11 pm
5253 spacer
Very happy to be under 70kg again. Diet going great with the lockdown - worried about the return to commuting, going into that London every day and all the temptations of snacking/drinking.
>> No. 5254 Anonymous
16th July 2020
Thursday 10:12 am
5254 spacer
Did you lose a leg or something?
>> No. 5255 Anonymous
16th July 2020
Thursday 10:27 am
5255 spacer
Thinking about it, do people weigh more when they have an erection?
>> No. 5256 Anonymous
16th July 2020
Thursday 10:42 am
5256 spacer

Why would they? The body is still made up of the same amount of matter, you don't absorb part of the ground.
>> No. 5257 Anonymous
16th July 2020
Thursday 11:03 am
5257 spacer
Greater volume?
>> No. 5261 Anonymous
16th July 2020
Thursday 5:02 pm
5261 spacer

Christ you're thickdense.
>> No. 5262 Anonymous
16th July 2020
Thursday 5:29 pm
5262 spacer

In other words, when you get a stiffy, the rest of you shrinks?
>> No. 5263 Anonymous
16th July 2020
Thursday 5:49 pm
5263 spacer
I thought a stiffy is when blood fills your willy. So a normal state might be 10 litres of blood in the rest of the body and 10 ml in penis. When aroused, it's 1010 ml of blood in your penis and 9 litres in the rest of your body. So it's still the same amount of blood weight, just distributed differently.
>> No. 5264 Anonymous
16th July 2020
Thursday 6:07 pm
5264 spacer

>> No. 5265 Anonymous
16th July 2020
Thursday 6:17 pm
5265 spacer
There's more to a stiffy than just blood. The muscles become fully engorged.
>> No. 5266 Anonymous
16th July 2020
Thursday 7:51 pm
5266 spacer
Water expands in volume by roughly 10% when frozen so if you wanted a bigger stiffy you could flash-freeze it.
>> No. 5267 Anonymous
16th July 2020
Thursday 9:40 pm
5267 spacer

Don't go giving mutilation-lad any more ideas until we get pictures of his last escapades.
>> No. 5268 Anonymous
17th July 2020
Friday 1:33 am
5268 spacer

Don't give me that face, Limmylad. It's pure thermodynamics here.

Your cock gets bigger. That's mass, in the form of blood, being distributed to the penis, which previously dwelled within your liver and your ear lobes and that flap of skin under your elbow. Therefore the rest of you body has lost mass, in order to allow the penis to gain it.

That's science that is lad. Getting a hard on makes the rest of you shrink. Especially when you're endowed like me.
>> No. 5269 Anonymous
17th July 2020
Friday 1:47 am
5269 spacer
I wish we had a better indication than actual LOL..
>> No. 5270 Anonymous
17th July 2020
Friday 7:59 am
5270 spacer
That's it. Who owns a set of scales? The only way to resolve this is conducting our own research.
>> No. 5271 Anonymous
17th July 2020
Friday 8:37 am
5271 spacer
>>5270 Anyone who thinks that the mass will change, is unlikely to run a well designed experiment, but have at it.
If the scales read more, by about 250g, it's because the engorged fella is now holding a copy of razzle.
Does razzle even still exist? Do porn mags still exist?
>> No. 5272 Anonymous
17th July 2020
Friday 9:04 am
5272 spacer

I think a spring scale attached to the penis would resolve those issues.
>> No. 5273 Anonymous
17th July 2020
Friday 9:05 am
5273 spacer
No no the only scientific way to do it is through displacement. You have to stick your knob into a bucket of water and then weigh the bucket.
>> No. 5322 Anonymous
19th July 2020
Sunday 7:11 pm
5322 spacer

Nonsense. You'd have to submerge your whole body excluding the knob; and then repeat the procedure when you have a lob on.

I would recommend a healthy dose of viagra to keep the chap up, because we'll need to repeat the test several dozen times at least to eliminate any variance at the accuracy levels we'll need.

Return ] Entire Thread ] First 100 posts ] Last 50 posts ]

Delete Post []