>>28571
Almost 2 and half years ago to the day I was in a wheelchair and struggling to walk, I battled back to health but I still can't manage to cut my own toenails. It's a bridge too far for me, but it's embarrassing to ask for help so I keep ruining my socks and it annoys me. However, when I do ask my wife also soaks them, uses a pumice stone on them and moisturises them. I've noticed the cuticles and skin in general stays supple for a while.

Try using hand cream, like that Norwegian stuff for sailors.

My brain's shit.

>>28573
This.

>>28571

I'd assume you answered your own question there. If your cuticle are always bleeding you might not be playing your bass properly anyway.

>>28575
They aren't always bleeding; it's just a recent thing.

PornHub's tendency to promote wannabe porn stars unwilling to show their face.

I'd kill every man here for a Kit Kat Chunky multipack.

>>28579
Do you like to munch four down like your'e having a massive regular 4-lane kitkat (that had become disconnected) ?

I'm okay with the SWP handing out their moronic

SOCIALIST WORKERS PARTY

_{Climate change is bad}
signs at Extinction Rebellion protests because it's such a transparently manipulative thing to do people are immediately turned off by it, but it creates so much waste as the things break and are discarded at the end of the day. Nobody wants to take them home. Do the SWP stick around to gather them up and recycle them? Do they fuck. If you're going to try to hijack an environmental protest movement as a recruiting tool, at least act like you give a minimal shit about the environment.
Complete shower of cunts.

>>28582

What else are you going to burn on your traditional post-protest bonfire?

>>28583

SWP members.

>>28579

Double or nothing- Fight me in a duel for a multipack of peanut butter kitk kat chunkys.

>>28579>>28585

I'd splatter the both of you to have Cadbury's Fuse bars back.

>>28585
>>28586
I trained under the First Sword of Wrexham, inherited a khukuri from my Granddad and once beat Skyrim with an Argonian beserker build. It's quite clear I'm the most capable duelist on the board by some margin. If I looked hard enough I might even find the shield I made out of a Tie Fighter wing as a child.

Those Kit Kats are mine.

>>28587

I'm probably just going to drive to Tesco and buy some Kit Kats, if it's all the same to you lads.

>>28588
I declare this illegal.

Why don't we pronounce the "c" in "blancmange"?

>>28588
You are without honour.

>>28590

And what is honour without chocolate?

blancmange pretty much literally translates to "white food" so the blanc in there is pronounced mostly how it is in french - without, or at least almost without the C.

>>28588

Bring us some baccy while you're there mate. And some M&M crispies. They're on offer for a quid.

>>28588
get us some bacon frazzles m8

Comment sections that are just references or repeats of whatever the poster has said in the past, only one in fifty is any good. See The Needle Drop and Limmy's Twitter for examples.

>>28595
Bounced on my boy's dick to this comment.

>>28596
http://www.nicememe.ca/

Acid reflux so strong Rennie has no effect. It feels like I've swallowed a cocktail of paint stripper and battery acid. This is fucking excruciating.

>>28598
This sounds counter-intuitive and contrary to what you would consider is common sense, but acid reflux is actually caused by too little acid in your stomach.
If your stomach isn't producing enough acid, bacteria and yeast are able to survive, their growth is what upsets the stomach and causes reflux up the throat.

Rennie only treats the symptoms, it lowers the acidity even more so that reflux is less painful, but it's not a cure.

The root cause of acid reflux is usually a salt deficiency. If you start to become deficient in salt, one of the ways your body will try and retain it is to produce less stomach acid.

Why you gotta' be setting your space shit in a whole new galaxy or something? There has to be some dumb wormhole-cum-slipspace-mega-tech for it to happen and our own solar system is easily interesting and diverse enough to support a whole game or film or whatever. And don't talk to me about no stupid aliens; aliens always just end up acting like space Fascists, space hippies or autistic physicists regardless of how big of a universe you put them in. Except the Quarians, they were kind of unique.

>>28598
You need ranitidine and Lansoprazole, Pepto Bismol in a bind. Rennies are a complete con job and don’t work.

A couple of parental gripes.

1. They refuse to pay for gift aid when they go places but then complain that this means they don't qualify for an annual pass. Just pay the extra ~10% and return as many times as you want in the next 12 months for free rather than fixating on getting in cheaper on this occasion.

2. For my birthday I've provided them with a list of books on my 'to read' list and stressed that I'd prefer used ones as they're much cheaper so they'd be able to buy a lot more. They bought me two new books when they could have got around ten for that price if they were savvy, plus if I'd known they weren't going to get them all I'd have hinted at other people to get them rather than things I'd have preferred less
I realise giving them a list for my birthday sounds a bit cuntish, but my family always outright tells one another what we want for presents.

>>28602
Bloody parents, acting as if you wouldn't be there if not for them.

>>28603
Precisely, they're to blame for everything.

>>28603
I fucking hate this shit. When I were a a teenlad, they'd often call me ungrateful, that I wouldn't be there if not for them, etc. While I was probably being a bit of a twat, I never got that argument.

I never asked to be brought into the world, so I don't see why I should be in any way grateful for it. Life is the worst gift you can give anyone.

>>28605

My mother has tried to make me feel guilty or that I owe her something for bringing me into the world, raising me, spending money on me etc. I always tell her I very much wish she hadn't bothered, and it's not exactly like I had a say in any of it. It's daft really, if it was that bad she should have thought about that before she got up the duff, or at least poisoned me as a baby.

My kindle updated itself and I lost all my non-amazon store books. What a fucking cunt on.

>>28606
Enjoy your low social credit and not being able to apply for a fishing license.

>>28607
Was it supposed to do that? Mine is almost exclusively used to read "legally acquired" books I've dumped in the /documents/ folder not store purchases, it'd be a pain in the arse if a software upgrade fucked with that. Although I do keep it in airplane mode to maximise battery life.

>>28609

I'm not sure. It was in my pocket at work and must have unlocked as I was moving about, when I next looked at it, it had three different updates done on it and all my "legally acquired" books were gone. I'm starting to think I must have caused it to factory reset while it was jiggling around in my pocket.

>>28610
You may want to check your library settings on the website and see if those legally acquired books are registered or not. Most ebook sellers can let their books be used through Kindle directly, via a link that you provide from that service to Amazon. I've bought a few collections from Humble that have worked this way.

Right, I've held off long enough about the weather but this is getting silly now. Its not the heat but the godawful humidity that has had me feeling clammy and disgusting all day. And my hair is in an even worse state!

What preparations have you lads made for the coming months of sunshine-hot-hot?

>>28612

Shaved my head, got a job outside, and bought an air conditioner for the shed.

>>28612
Bought emergency blankets to cover the windows during the day.

Fucking estate agents fucking me abouT.

We went round, after the estate agent gave us all that about "getting in quick because there's a lot of interest". Bloody tennants gave the game away straight away by telling us we were the first ones to come look. We called up to say we'd take it literally straight away, they said they'd call us back, and what do you know, they've still gone and given it to someone else.

What is wrong with these people. What is their fucking game.

Why the fuck is PC gaming not simple anymore. It seems like so many companies are cutting corners and doing bad ports and badly optimised games for PC now. For days it took me about half an hour to start up one of two games, fiddle about with the settings so that it works THIS time, then I get to play for an hour before encountering some issue. Two games now. Two games I've paid for and can barely play due to updates that have rendered them buggy as fuck. Even did a clean install of Windows recently, nothing is conflicting on my end, a game update happens and fucks everything. It shouldn't be a bleeding chore to relax during some precious free time.

>>28616
This is why you end up at PS4/Xbox instead - I don't want to fiddle with DirectX drivers and debug nine kinds of shit just to play a game; I do that all day at work.

>>28615
I'm not sure if you have to be a cunt before you become an estate agent, or the job turns you into one.

>>28615
I don't get it - so was there lots of interest or not?

>>28619

I think what happened is they basically forgot about us; we phoned first thing Saturday morning, they told us they'd get back to us when they'd spoken to the landlord. Then when we hadn't heard anything by Monday we called back and they said it had been taken. We know we were the first viewers, so unless someone had taken it without viewing we should also have been the first to express interest. Which means we should have fucking got it.

I wish my utter cynicism wasn't always right, but I think it's just one of those cases. I trusted Leanne to ring us back; what I should really have done is trusted my instincts that Leanne is a slack fucking bint and called her back every half hour until she got her shit together.

I normally wouldn't be so annoyed about this but the house was in the perfect location for me and the Mrs to both have a decent commute; all of our other options either leave me slogging through traffic for ages or her getting a long convoluted bus/train route.

>>28618

Both.

>>28618
the weasel I'm dealing with for a car lease could easily be an estate agent on the side. He's completely uninterested in actually doing his fucking job, keeps telling me that he was on annual leave again, so another week's passed with him failing to do an easy 10 minutes work. Get the puncture fixed, schedule the delivery. 3 weeks and counting. Cunt. I'm going to have to rent something to tide me over.

If there is one thing worse than a train arriving late it is a train leaving early. I regret having not gone to expain the fundamentals of their job to the platform manager whilst waiting for the next one.

Described myself as "ace" to a bunch of alternative sorts online last night, as in a really cool fighter pilot or the best card in a deck.

About half-an-hour later I realised everyone had thought I'd come out as asexual.

http://www.whatisasexuality.com/am-i-ace/teen/

>>28622
Wouldn't happen to be King's Cross would it? The absolute gobshites have tried to catch me out a few times with a train I've pre-booked tickets on arriving and subsequently leaving early.

>>28624
Not him but I have also run into this problem at King's Cross more than once (and not elsewhere).

It's the night before an exam and I don't think I have ever felt more awake.

If there is any evidence to sya we as humans aren't created by an intelligent being it would be the fact that sleep, something apparently essential to our existence, is also completely fucking impossible when we need it the most.

>>28622
>>28624
>>28625
There are signs up about doors being locked a certain amount of time before departure. I remember they used to say 30 seconds, thought I've seen 40 and 60 elsewhere. I've heard that in some places they've put it up to a piss-taking 90 seconds. As soon as the doors are locked, the driver is free to go as long as the guard agrees and the signals are clear. The timetable already has more padding than a typical England batting line-up, so if you're having to leave early just to not arrive late someone has fucked up massively somewhere.

In fairness, it should be noted that the departure time shown in the timetable is just that: departure time, as in wheels rolling. That said, the working timetable has "advertised to leave X minutes early" (i.e. the public timetable shows an earlier time) as a standard note so I don't know why they don't just use that if delays on starting out are such a problem.

I largely dodged the post-adolecsent problem of embarrassing email handles, but occasionally I'll get a message using a name I chose out of a bad poem, or I'll have to use my back up email which is basically "DelicateUnicornBoy@supernet.co.uk".

>>28628
I've just noticed that my email recovery address is a years old mailbox on a server I no longer have access to. I'd better not lose that 64-character random password I set.

Speaking of emails, I created a new Gmail account on Friday to apply for jobs. I've only submitted my details for a position at a local council and I'm already getting spam; that job application is literally the only thing linked to the account.

>>28630
I had this last time I was looking for a job.
Cunts, all of them.

>>28630
You know how hackers try brute-forcing passwords? Spammers do the same thing with email addresses these days. They know that sbennett@ is a valid address, so they'll start tacking numbers on the end because that's what people do when names aren't available.

I have a parcel that is in customs, it's had it it's charges worked out but it seems the fuckers just gave up after that and forgot about it since it hasn't moved since.

Saw a brochure from a business calling themselves "Labradoors, an Electric Garage Door Comapny", with a wee silhouette of a dog for a logo. They stuck with that name so I can only assume whoever thought of it kept their job. Shocking.

>>28634

Well you've remembered it and just gave them free advertising and now I remember it. Seems less stupid now.

>>28635
I knew some smug cunt was going to say that. I look forward to seeing your new garage doors in a future thread.

>>28636
hahahaha

>>28634
Fuck, now I'm thinking of it too. Was it your bloody idea? It was, wasn't it? Is this stage II, the viral marketing campaign targeting Britain's most influential and widespread forums? Jog on, shill.

Okay, that's it, I'm adding paid advertising to the site. This time next year we'll all be millionaires etc.

>>28641

Seeing that image made the jingle automatically start playing in my head.

I've been trying to get into newfangled things like Reddit and Twitter, because I feel old and all the websites I post on are slowly dying.

Everything about it is boiling my piss. Posting restrictions and arbitrary conditions, with posts just getting auto-deleted if you fail to meet them. Fuck me. I mean I can see why it's probably necessary but it's infuriating.

>>28643
I've been trying to get into the UKPersonalFinance sub on Reddit after seeing it mentioned a few times on here, which is my first experience of the place. However, I've seen some dangerous advice given by people who don't know what they're talking about and the threads are largely repetitive; it's mainly either "got a lump sum, what do?" or humble-bragging about how much they earn.

>>28644
It seems to me that reddit is mostly home to youngsters and/or neophytes, with the more knowledgable types congregating on old-style niche forums. Even imageboards are better because they tend to attract obsessive autists.

>>28644
>I've seen some dangerous advice given by people who don't know what they're talking about

On Reddit??? Never!!!

Good thing they dont have subreddits about political issues or anything important like that.

>>28645

You do tend to see a lot of "hahaha remember (thing)" type memes on Reddit, where the joke is that the thing is meant to have been ages ago but it was only actually two or three years. There's also a lot of that weird "oh man I've seen some SHIT" attitude from people who probably don't even know what goatse, tubgirl or 2girls1cup were.

I just don't like the internet any more, I think.

>>28647

Their front page is full of people sneering at people doing stupid things when you get the impression those doing the sneering are only mildly more intelligent.

>>28647

When I think about explosive diarrhea, it gives me a stabbing pain in my upper inner right thigh where it meets the groin. Tubgirl is one of two images which causes me physical pain. I can't find the other again but it was a screenshot of someone's facebook status saying she had just learned that cleaning diarrhea off Ben's scrotum was like scraping butter of an English muffin. I assume Ben was a baby.

>>28649
>When I think about explosive diarrhea, it gives me a stabbing pain in my upper inner right thigh where it meets the groin.

You are now breathing manually and blinking manually.
You just lost The Game.
You are now thinking of explosive diarrhea.

>>28646
>Good thing they dont have subreddits about political issues or anything important like that.

We're not much better in that respect. If you look at, say, the Syria threads or just about any thread on /pol/ or /news/ that are a few years old it's clear that the posters who try to come across as experts and knowledgeable in that field were completely pulling it out of their arse. Some of it is spectacularly inaccurate. In hindsight, the Syria threads seem like we've been infiltrated by Russians or Russian sympathisers.

Feels like a dig when I get told to watch shit like this.

>>28651

I think reddit biggest problem is the circle jerk. Opposing position regardless of quality get down voted to oblivion ones that are fundamentally stupid but preach to the choir are promoted into the stratosphere.

What makes this worse is that this is by design. The 'wrong' popular threads are are deleted before they ever hit the front of r/all there are various things that that track this now like r/undelete

There is a secret admin group I think its called something as Orwellian as 'anti-evil' that manages this policy.

So when you see another anti vax are so dumb, next marvel movie great thread it is there by design.

Parcelforce decided to reschedule my delivery without telling me.

Wankers.

I feel slightly guilty about being slightly shitty to a chugger on my way home. She accosted me in the train station with the line "Are you friendly?". A somewhat curt "no" did nothing to temper her enthusiasm to "just start a conversation", nor did my reply "I don't mean to be rude, but I'm not interested in whatever you're pitching and just want to wait for my train in peace". I backed away, but she started literally following me around the station concourse. I ended up explaining in detail why both the charity she was raising money for and the overheads of street fundraising offer extremely poor value for money to donors and have a detrimental effect on the charitable sector as a whole; she just looked sad and slightly ashamed and didn't know what to say.

I shouldn't have made a stranger's day worse for no real reason, but her sheer persistence really wound me up.

>>28652

I really wish that YouTube would stop promoting conspiracy theory bollocks. A search for "international space station" no longer returns a page full of videos "proving" that the ISS is a hoax, so at least they're doing something, but they don't seem to be trying particularly hard to deal with the dangerous pseudoscientific bollocks that litters their platform.

>>28656
Bottom line is they don't give a shit unless it gets them bad publicity and threatens their revenue.

>>28653

I've only been using it about a week but I've already come to much the same conclusion. User voting seems like a great idea at first, until you realise that the users are mostly morons, and having them vote just encourages moronic posts to be voted up because they have the right memes in them.

>>28656
>Imagine playing a co-op shooter like Fortnite Battle Royale or PUB-G with on a VR headset... in real time, with zero lag
Okay, I'm imagining it. Now what?

>>28653
I like how you've cleverly posted the most obvious, oft-repeated and shallow criticisms of reddit. Very meta.

>>28655
I hope you don't mind me saying but I'd shake your hand if I could. These arseholes come and knock on my door (at least twice just in the past couple of weeks) and if I say "Sorry I'm not buying anything" the moment I can see they have a clipboard or whatever and go to close the door they say "I'm not selling anything", one of them pointed to his t-shirt with the charity logo on it as he said it.

I think people without serious issues around simply ignoring the boundaries of others don't last long in the job or are reluctant to take it in the first place.

One asked me if I was friendly. I said "moderately" and kept walking and that was that. Maybe that's the magic word somehow.

>>28663

I think it's a sales technique where they start with a question you can't say no to. One tried to sell me a dodgy photocopied book of jokes and started with "Do you like a laugh?". I said no and they looked baffled.

>>28664

One was saying peculiar things to me about what we had in common like he used to have the same bag as me and when he asked my hometown he said his fellow chugger was from the same place. I was baffled he thought I was supposed to care.

>>28665

I just typo'd chigger before I fixed it.

>>28665
I think these people have a training course which is just being read a condensed to one page of bulletpoints version of How to win friends & influence people. Most likely it's missing the one very important bulletpoint that explains if people can tell even on a subconscious level that you're trying to manipulate them then it'll make them dislike you far more than if you were just plainly asking.

>>28667

I've done a few shit sales type jobs in my time, from cold-calling flogging iPads to door knocking for market research.

The one thing they've always had in common is that the sales training they give you is utterly ineffective, and about twenty years behind what people have already become used to just saying no to immediately. There are two type of people who succeed at sales- Either you're a genuine "people person" with the ability to chat shit to anyone, or you have Derren Brown level powers of suggestion and essentially jedi mind trick people into agreeing with you.

The one most essential thing they never teach is that you really can't rescue a pitch from someone who's flat out not interested. I'm not sure why this obvious fact escapes the people responsible for training, but it's for this reason that you get those godawful jar-shakers who try it on even when you basically tell them to fuck off. The training always tries to tell you it's worth a shot and that you have to be persistent, with some semi-mythical bullshit about landing that massive sale from what at first seemed to be a dead end; but it's simply a waste of time. It's always far more efficient to just cut it off and knock on the next door/call the next person etc.

>>28655
>I ended up explaining in detail why both the charity she was raising money for and the overheads of street fundraising offer extremely poor value for money to donors and have a detrimental effect on the charitable sector as a whole; she just looked sad and slightly ashamed and didn't know what to say.
The correct action here would have been to just say in a slightly raised voice "look, just fuck off and leave me alone". 100% success rate, and shouldn't ruin their day.

>>28668
They did when I did cold-calling back in 2010 or so. The word was 'negs'. Negs aren't gonna get you a sale no matter what, so waste as little time on them as possible and move on, checking their house number off the list as you go. The absolute worst thing to encounter were COWS: Cannot Operate Without Spouse. They're really interested, spend ages talking to you (and not in the facetious way people sometimes do with telemarketers) but get terrified as soon as paperwork comes out, at which point they need to consult with the other half who is never present. I was selling TalkTalk packages I should mention, so it wasn't just a case of getting them to part with some cash and then leaving, it involved another phone call to TT themselves.

Absolutely horrible job, I'll never forget it. You're bothering almost everyone who answers the door and it makes you feel rotten after a while, though genuine abuse is surprisingly rare in this country at least. I'm a lot nicer to such people now if they come to the door - I'll at least chat with for a minute about the job while making it clear I'm not going to buying anything. Also it tears your feet to shreds and half the time you'll work 9 hours with 15 minutes for lunch and make absolutely no money at all.

>>28672
What is the quickest, easiest way to be identified as a 'neg'?

>>28673
"Sorry, not interested" while already closing the door. I don't think it matters on you though, it's about the training the person has gotten. We were told to use our instincts and if someone was clearly not going to budge then move on asap. Seems like many of the above posters are referring to chuggers and such who've been told the key is chirpy persistence. In that case try lobbing a brick.

>>28673
A very quick "no thank you" and walk off/close the door. There is no need to be British levels of polite at this.

>>28673

Mention it on the Grindr profile.

The word "fierce".

If you ever feel bad about being single then just look at your bank balance. Fucking hell does pussy put a dent in your finances like little else.

She's in the same boat

>>28678
I'm a virgin in his mid 20s and my bank balance is still shit. Student finance will do that to you. That said, I've seen some of my peers working off overdraft for years after uni; thank fuck I'm not in that position.

It's been sunny and dry all morning but within 10 seconds of me leaving the house it starts FUCKING PISSING IT FUCKING DOWN. FUCK THIS FUCKING PLACE. CUNT.

>>28680
The sun is out for the first time in days here. Muggy and humid though, could be a storm coming.

>>28678

People always say this but I've never really got that. If anything my girlfriends have saved me money by taking my time and attention away from my many expensive hobbies. I also tend to go out with women who have jobs and are capable of supporting themselves. And back in the day, splitting the rent and bills worked out cheaper too.

I did buy my current missus a car though, now you mention it. Hmm.

>>28680

It did that here too and I actually went to stand in the rain, it was a welcome change from the horrible humidity. There was a proper nice clear rainbow when it rained too.

People who self-identify as "nerds" or "geeks" with their entire personality revolving around buying pieces of cardboard and plastic from Games Workshop, Wizards of the Coast Hasbro, Funko Inc or Disney's Star Wars division.
They're not bad people but it is purely rampant popular consumerism and not the harmless niche hobbies they believe it is.

>>28685

I think they are bad people. They adopted the culture of people who were social pariahs, but decided they still wanted to treat them as social pariah. The people who used to be called geeks and nerds when it was a pejorative are now called neckbeards instead, and people still treat them like shit even though they have stolen their identity.

I remember hearing the statement on QI of all places "Counter culture is just out sourced R&D for capitalism" and it's true.

What was authentic is reduced down to a lifestyle you can buy and faking will make you popular.

Mind you it isn't as bad as people who wear not seeing star wars like a badge of honor as if cultural ignorance was an achievement and an identity.

>>28685

I'd agree, but I don't think you'll find many of those people putting in the effort to assemble and paint Games Workshop minis. That takes too much effort and genuine investment, when what these people are looking for is a convenient label and culture to fit into, in lieu of a personality of their own.

You might find them in drop-in DnD campaigns at those trendy little geek cafés that sell imported Pop Tarts. It takes less homework. But mostly they just make sure they have plenty of Marvel posters up around the house and watch Star Wars a couple of times.

>>28686

I also agree with this. Being a geek or nerd hasn't been more acceptable, normal people have simply appropriated the term.

See also: Tattoos, facial piercings, keeping reptiles as pets, pop punk, rockabilly fashion, riding a motorbike when you've only done your CBT... Maybe the circles I move in are just too full of tedious overgrown student hipster cunts, but I've definitely noticed that people just seem to pick whatever "alternative" identity they think appeals to them right off the shelf nowadays.

>>28687

You left off rock climbing it is both the thing to put on your dating profile to seem exciting, and the rock climbing centre is also the place to hang out like it is a coffee shop with your laptop, not doing any climbing.

>motorbike when you've only done your CBT

I didn't think you needed to be into more darker shit than cock and ball torture to be cool enough for a motorcycle but I'll take your word for it.

>>28686

I haven't seen Star Wars (I think I saw the Phantom Menace when I was about 13) but I typically pretend I have, because it's just not worth the hassle. I'm sure they're very good, but I already know what happens and I'm sort of put off by the idea that they're 'important'.

When it comes to hobbies and interests I'm probably an 'actual' nerd by the traditional definition, with interests such as soldering together my own synthesisers, building radio antenna, and reading books with CGI spaceships as cover art and long, vague titles. I try not to mention this stuff to anyone (other than places like here) because I know that rarely people care. I've made the mistake of being asked what I do for a hobby and answering honestly, and by the time you've explained what a Raspberry Pi is any why you have one stuck to your roof with bits of copper sticking out of it, they think you're a murderer. Luckily I have more vague things I can say like 'music' or 'photography' without mentioning modular synthesis or MAX/msp or developing your own film. I suppose there must be a lot of 'sleeper nerds' like this.

Anyway, I know a lad who's never had a Big Mac and likes to mention that at almost every opportunity. People seem to care, too. "oh my god! That's crazy!" fuck off, he's missing out on an quite good, three quid burger, that's just a mistake on his part, not an interesting fact.

>>28687

>right off the shelf nowadays

I suspect it's always been like this, just it used to be a bit more local. My mum didn't invent being a goth, and likely only did it because she knew ten other goths. Maybe she had to dye her own clothes black or whatever but the idea was the same, she was dressing and acting like a load of her mates. I think youth culture must be a lot more diffuse these days, as you can obviously access and assimilate any culture worldwide. Back in the day you might never have been a punk if your city didn't have a record shop that sold punk albums or you couldn't pick up the one radio station playing that sort of thing. Now you can be fully and exclusively into Brazilian acid funk and pretend that's the only thing that speaks to you.

>>28689
>I haven't seen Star Wars (I think I saw the Phantom Menace when I was about 13) but I typically pretend I have, because it's just not worth the hassle. I'm sure they're very good, but I already know what happens and I'm sort of put off by the idea that they're 'important'.

By no means was my comment about not seeing star wars an attack on people who haven't seen star wars. You keep doing you.

Apologies for the following rant you've awakened something in me by your statement.

The truth is there are 3 good star wars films (really only 2 are exceptional cinema but the third rounds off the story very well). But they have been fucked around with both by re-editing, and by expansion of the cannon since in ways that ruin them.

You would be hard pressed now to find a version of the original star wars that hadn't been fucked with in post in a way that ruins the tone and pace without knowing what you were looking for, so if you are happy where you are I wouldn't even start, but they are up there with seven samurai in terms of quality story telling.

As for how the expansion of cannon fucked them, firstly the force and Jedi knights were originally talked about in vague and mystical terms and it really helped sell a meta spiritual idea that 'if you are true of heart you are strong with the force' that the audiance related with but later the force was explained away as a physical property in the blood, and the Jedi knights became interstellar police. Essentially without changing the films in that sense they have fucked the meaning behind them.

The audience didn't understand the difference between what is psychologically exciting and what is visually spectacular so equated them with each other. The light sabre battles are nothing visually impressive in the originals but carry a lot of emotional and narrative weight and some how people have mentally equated what they felt with it being more visually interesting but have ignored the underlying importance. what has resulted in later movies when the people who grew up with them started making them is kind of like how a Michael Bay fight makes you feel bored because you are just watching the fight coordinators and FX team jerk off.

>>28692
>I suspect it's always been like this

It clearly wasn't back in the days of the Nazis hanging the Edelweiss Pirates, and US riot police coming into Jazz clubs to 'beat up n!ggers', But I could understand you believing these things given what things have been like in living memory.


> My mum didn't invent being a goth, and likely only did it because she knew ten other goths
You've made the fallacy and it is an understandable one of equating fashion and the cultural trappings of culture with culture. You make this mistake because a lot of what you are told about these things are by people who don't care about any sort of underlying ideology, but only want to sell something.

Take for example what we have been talking about geek and nerds. Is there anything outwardly expressive in reading a comic, or molding a railway or sticking a raspberry pi on your roof for reasons I don't pretend to understand? No it is something of a personal journey a hobby, that is what defines a culture even if they look no different from anyone else. When someone starts wearing a t-shirt with Batman on though, we get into an interesting discussion though as to why they are. Are their motives wholly personal expression, is it just something they picked because it looked cool or trendy, or some mixture of both. (I'm currently wearing a pokemone t-shirt it is my fravorite shirt, but the pokemon on it is obscure enough and the design naff enough I don't feel like I'm broadcasting any sort of street cred).

Capitalism will always step in and try sell you the band tour T-shirt like it was the same thing as being there. It is up to us to recognize the difference without being snooty pricks about it to people who show up later.

PAYG phone top-ups at cash machines have just quietly been discontinued. EE gave me no warning at all. I just learned today when I tried it on two different cash machines.

https://community.o2.co.uk/t5/Pay-As-You-Go/ATM-top-ups-being-discontinued/td-p/1220499

(Not my photo. Just grabbed it off that forum thread.)

>>28694

It seems we're talking about two different things.

>>28696

we aren't, we were orginally talking about Geek culture and branding, and the idea of selling someone an identity they can pick up and have, and I deconstructed that as to the difference between actually having an identity and merely having the appearance of one. Goth is largely just fashion and art around the macabre so it won't ever really be deeper than that, but there are deeper interests that are co-opted and sold which was the original examples.

Of course if you use an example that is heavily linked to the record industry at a time at the height of their power you are going to find nothing once you dig below the surface your mistake is assuming everything is like that.

>>28697

You're trying really hard to be right, I'll give you that much.

>>28698

Well since you havent expanded your point or explained yourself at all I must presume you don't actually have a coherent one to make. You are just saying no it isn't.

>>28699

I don't have the energy to argue over a point I never made, lad.

You're both getting locked in the shed until you've learnt to get along.

>>28701

I can get along with him just FINE! it's HIM who can't get along with ME!

>>28653
>I think reddit biggest problem is the circle jerk. Opposing position regardless of quality get down voted to oblivion ones that are fundamentally stupid but preach to the choir are promoted into the stratosphere.

>What makes this worse is that this is by design. The 'wrong' popular threads are are deleted before they ever hit the front of r/all there are various things that that track this now like r/undelete.

Visitors to the The_Donald message board, which describes itself as “a never-ending rally dedicated to the 45th President of the United States, Donald J Trump” and has more than 750,000 subscribers, will be greeted with a message about the reasons for the quarantine before they can click through to the site. The quarantine also restricts the message board, known as a subreddit, from generating revenue and limits its popular posts from reaching an audience in other parts of Reddit.

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2019/jun/26/reddit-the-donald-trump-quarantined-subreddit

I love living in London. It's genuinely given me a new lease of life.

It's busy, it's fun, it's exciting, there's always somebody around, something to do.

The only drawback, and admittedly it is a big one, is that room mates you get are fucking useless. It is absolutely mindblowing the kind of manchildren that inhabit this earth and cannot live like an adult.

Our flat literally has a paid cleaner who comes every other week, leaves the place spotless, so that means for two weeks if you wash up after yourself and wipe up any major spills we're pretty much golden and our flat looks great.

Without failure, two days in, one housemate seems to make it his mission to shit up the side of the bowl and leave it and the other just fucking trashes the kitchen and doesn't wash up. These people are in their mid 30s and it's fucking embarrassing having to ask them to sort their shit.

I only take solace in the fact that they will probably die alone as no self-respecting woman/partner would ever survive them long term.

>>28704
My housemate behaves similarly. I don't think he's doing it on purpose but is just oblivious. I made this last night, currently considering the pros and cons of putting it on the fridge. The idea is to put a name and date on there every time I do one of the things on it to draw attention to how much housework actually takes place and how little they're doing.
I wanted to include "Cleaned up someone else's beard hair", "Mopped piss off the floor", "Cleaned oven", "Re-washed dishes that weren't cleaned properly", "Wiped kitchen counter", "Hoovered" and some other things but there isn't really space for it.

>>28705

Christ, the re-washed thing strikes a chord more than anything. When they do finally wash up they basically dip whatever needs washing in and out of water and then leave it to dry, with half of their last meal still on it.

The thing I don't get is it takes no effort at all to wash up and live in a nice place. It takes what, 20 seconds per item max? Maybe slightly longer for big items. Then it's done, don't have to stare at it and eventually has to get done anyway so just o it.

I think your approach might be slightly passive aggressive though, I've had best results by just confronting it and saying 'you need to wash up I don't want to live like this, you're 35'. Basically the shame card.

Having said that the same cycle repeats after a few weeks so maybe you might be right to log it.

I'll revert back to my bitterness, he talks about how when he buys his own flat and shows me pictures of nice flats he uses for inspiration and all I can think is how his will look nothing like that because it will be a fucking mess.

I also find it really annoying two of us pay the rent for a place that isn't particularly great, but it's location is right by work, so it makes sense, this man is paying premium rate and doesn't even work near here, so what's the point?.

>>28706
>I've had best results by just confronting it and saying 'you need to wash up I don't want to live like this, you're 35'. Basically the shame card.
Our chatlog is already just a history of me asking him to clean up after himself. Usually he gets the message but I hate having to nag like this about obvious things that shouldn't need mentioning.

>>28706 this man is paying premium rate and doesn't even work near here, so what's the point?.

He gets a free, slightly moany, cleaner.

>>28705
The graph is enough to display passive aggression, adding dates is just self indulgent .. besides, they might interpret it as a schedule you're willing to begrudingly keep.

>>28707
You have my sympathies fellow tidy lad and good luck.

>>28708
You mock but I actually bought all my own things and keep them in my room.

When nobody else would wash up his mess to use the communal pots he too stopped washing up, confused as to why it wasn't happening, he started just eating microwave meals and takeaway Nandos.

It felt cruel but I enjoyed watching him continuously eat stuff he didn't want to eat all because he wouldn't rub a sponge around a pot a few times and rinse it out.

>>28710
>When nobody else would wash up his mess to use the communal pots he too stopped washing up, confused as to why it wasn't happening, he started just eating microwave meals and takeaway Nandos.

Washing up is so easy though. You just stand in the same place for fifteen minutes listening to the radio and then it's over. Hoovering can be a ballache, but washing up? Even I do it and I'm barely sentient.

I told my mum I liked rhubarb and custard sweets once and now I occasionally get given a bag of the boiled, red and yellow ones, rather than the squishy, pastel-coloured ones I was actually talking about.

>>28712

Well it's the thought that counts I guess.

>>28712
Your fault for not specifying rhubarb and custard chews.

When I wait for the bus in the morning there is a women who catches it from the same spot.
Thing is she comes from a block of flats down the road, crosses the road, walks down a bit then crosses back over to the bus stop.
I dunno if she is trying to pretend she doesn't live in them or something but it just fucking annoys me.

>>28713
I guess.

>>28714
I don't think I even knew there was another kind whenever it was I mentioned it. The worst thing about the boiled ones is that they're too big, they take up about a third of my gob space so I end up eating them.

Lads is this possible? I was watching a few episodes of Top Gear on Netflix, on my TV, then later went onto my laptop and went to Youtube. All of a sudden I'm getting car related recommendations and the only reason I've noticed is because they literally never come up for me. But yeah just this creepy future shit in general pisses me off.

>>28717
Just wait, they'll stop now you've mentioned disliking them here.

>>28717
Have you run a virus scan on your TV recently?

>>28719
He's going to have to reformat and reinstall the TV.

>>28719>>28720

Why are you berks talking as if TVs haven't been running OSes and being connected to the internet for the last fifteen years?

>>28722

I'm still using a SONY KE-P42XS1. I can't afford to give a fuck.

>>28722
Dunno what you mean.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-48664251

I was on Greenwich Peninsula yesterday and I guess there was a Father Ted thing going on because there were so many people wearing identical t-shirts with "That's nice!" on the front and "Feck off!" on the back. You know that bit in Extras where all the people wearing t-shirts with the shitty slogans on turn up? Like that. Not even better quality.
There's a bridge there which doesn't go anywhere, they claim it's a park but it feels more like a museum with a small number of unimaginative exhibits of plants and trees in places they can't really grow; "Here's what we think nature might have looked like". Endless paving trod by families clutching bags of crap from the M&M World shop passing adverts for exclusive £550,000 one bedroom flats in the glass towers, plump young men in Oakleys and Marvel t-shirts, a crowd gathered to watch a group of dancers who appeared to be there to advertise for Nike.
Have you noticed how featureless so many of these new developments are? There'll be flat pavement intersecting with the building's wall at a sharp angle, no variation in either. It's as though the architects are trying to imitate early Counter Strike maps, as few polygons as possible to create something that vaguely resembles a human construction. The desert of the real.

It's Sunday, it's really hot, just let me sit around in my pants and watch Star Trek, stop making me garden.

I always get thirsty over exes about a year or so after it ended.

I don't know how to stop this. It doesn't matter if I'm single or with someone far better, I just crave fucking them the same way you crave a food you haven't had in ages.

I hate my brain, honestly.

>>28728

I suggest having bitter, ugly breakups (or, indeed, bitter ugly exes).

>>28729

Neither of those present a serious obstacle. I think it's just a forbidden fruit kind of thing.

Maybe I LIKE starchy rice.

>>28731

Just wash it you lazy cunt

I just cannot be fucked with work. I should quit.

>>28733
I'd say post about it in the workplace annoyances thread, but the mods locked it for literally no reason.

>>28734

Maybe start a work annoyances thread mk II?

>>28735

When that lad tried to start a dream thread mk II he got deleted and banned so there you go.

>>28735
There's no reason to start a new thread when there wasn't anything wrong with the old thread, especially on a board as slow as /job/.

Watched a few episodes of The Thick of It on the iPlayer and now clips are getting recommended on YouTube, watched it on my TV and everything, totally seperate machine. Hate this shit, makes me feel like a schizophrenic.

>>28737

It was literally fucking massive though.

>>28736

That was only because I'd already made on with Scarlett Moffat's face on it to stare at you all for the next ten years.

>>28739

I don't understand your agenda against long threads. As a mod you should realise that the defining trait of britfa.gs is slow, cumbersome legacy. This is our mausoleum and you're trying to dust it - it ruins the character

>>28739
>It was literally fucking massive though.

So what? It serves as a time capsule.

>>28740

I'm not even a mod, just saying. Considering that a lot of us phone post now (I'd estimate a good 50-70% of .gs traffic is from the toilet), so long threads are more of a pain in the arse.

They do keep the old threads around, just locked, right?

>>28742

If your argument is about how good GS is for mobile there is a world more concerning issues with this site then the volume of user content.

For the last few days I've eaten spicy food almost exclusively. Enchiladas, spicy beef pizza with jalapeños on, and such like.

I'm regretting it today. It's caught up with me and I'm wracked with agonising gut cramps. I've had about four shits already and they're getting increasingly sloppy and hot on my ringpiece.

How do I make it stop jesus christ.

>>28744
boof milk

I realise this is going to make me sound like one of those MRA loons, but there's been a fair amount of coverage in the news about a man and woman getting beaten up in Manchester. The woman turned down someone's advances and was twatted in the face, which was followed by the twatter and his two mates beating seven shades of shit out of the man. The news coverage has overwhelmingly focused on what happened to the woman, even though the man was attacked far worse; I know violence against women isn't socially acceptable and the media like a story centred on an attractive woman but it's still pretty jarring he's been demoted to a mere footnote.

>>28746
He failed to protect his woman. Nobody likes to celebrate or sympathise with failure.

>>28747
They were leaving the Gay Village, so I just assumed he was a bumder.

There ought to be a law about doing bread in odd slices. Don't give me all that talk about soup, if I wanted dipping bread I'd use the crusts (which coincidentally are unusually skinny).

It's the cheek of it. Slicing the bread is automated so they've deliberately set out to give the good people of this nation odd slices while knowing full well that people overwhelmingly consume two bits of bread for sandwiches and toast. Is this how they do things in Lancashire?

>>28750

https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/bread-rolls-in-for-david-cameron-with-pound25000-from-warburtons-zrr5rdcj79g

It's another Tory divide and conquer tactic. They know the average Tory would never buy a mass-produced Chorleywood bread, it's only local artisan sourdough for them, so the only people buying their bread are the plebs. Get them angry about bread slice sizes, and they won't have time or energy to worry about the real issues.

>>28750

Well there's obviously summat up wi 'em. Bloody Lancashire.

>>28751
>Chorleywood
Are you thinking of Chorley? To be fair, they're both outside the M25, so most Londoners wouldn't know the difference. About 200 miles.

>>28753

I'm not him but I don't know much about chorleywood bread except it's mean't to be not real bread somehow.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chorleywood_bread_process

Yorkshire bread > Lancashire bread.

>>28753
You fucked the job there, didn't you lad? Don't go around accusing folk of being ignorant Londoners unless you're absolutely sure of what you're on about.

>>28755
Jackson's is like crack. I had to stop buying it because otherwise I'd eat a whole loaf in a couple of days.

Mind you, calling a loaf of bread a "bloomer" is a /101/ on it's own.

>>28759
>on it's own

Why is everyone of my namesake such an utter fucking prick? I'm not being unfair here, I'm one of them, it's just remarkable how uniform the twattishness is. Perhaps "uniform" is the wrong word, because it takes different forms.

I don't know who did the redesign of Vice's homepage, but they should probably be kept under psychiatric observation for the rest of the week.

>>28762
Go on.

>>28763
It's just a scattershot mess, there's not much more to say.

>>28778
Given it looks like a fairly normal three column job, you might have to be a bit more specific.

>>28762
By modern standards of news sites, it really isn't that bad; in fact I think I quite like it.

"I will kill that man. I don't care how many arrows they feather me with, how many spears they run through me - I will kill that STOP BREXIT c*nt before I fall!"

>>28824
>c*nt

What? What is this? What even is this?

>>28825
We don't talk about filthy European currency here, m7.

>>28825
I just copy and pasted from a quote site. Too hot to proof read.

Had a fucking shocker at work.

Ah well.

>>28843
Well then don't touch the light switch when your hands are wet.

>>28844
😬

Unforecast rain. It's being going at umbrella strength for a good few minutes now.

>>28847
I told you mate and people will have you believe they can forecast the weather thirty years from now.

>>28848
Well shit, you could have told me before I booked the garden party for my 60th.

>>28848
Long term trends are completely different to week-on-week events. You can safely assume when the world population will hit eight billion, but that doesn't mean you know how many babies will be born at York Hospital this coming Wednesday. Stop being silly.

>>28850
What do you mean you can estimate how many times out of a hundred any given number on a dice will show up when rolled but you can't tell me which number's going to come up next?!

>>28851
I can tell you with around 17% confidence that it'll be a 4.

>>28852
That's a significantly lower accuracy than even a ten-day forecast.

>>28853
Roll it 20 times and that goes up to 97%.

>>28846

Can't believe I got away wih an emoji response.

(A good day to you Sir!)

>>28854
Roll it 20 times and there's still only a 17% chance it'll be a 4 next roll.

>>28856
Look mate, do you want a 4 or not?

>>28858
What is this, unambitious DND?

>>28641

I just learned this was a parody of a specific Slinky advert.

I had a dream that took place within in a fictional home this morning, and I liked the design so much I immediately tried to sketch it out, but my drawing skills are so utterly pathetic that I could get more than one wall down before giving up. Looked like a ten year old had done it, a shit ten year old.

>>28861

Try doing something simpler, like a floor plan. Or simply write out the details you remember in words to supplement where your sketching skills are lacking.

I'm sure there's plenty of architects or interior designers that aren't great draughtsmen.

>>28571
Yet another company in administration using it as an excuse to blatantly run off with customers' money.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-49200999

>The group said Super Break hotel-only holidays would be cancelled and people currently on holiday might have to pay again.

>Malvern Group said [...] tickets for entertainment and attractions were no longer valid.

Thankfully not affected myself, but this is becoming tiresome.

People who don't believe in brevity. I'll admit many of my posts on here are minor essays, but I'm talking IRL, face-to-face, humans who will, on repeate occasions, divulge every single detail of a story, or a thing they watced, or what have you. It's not even the case that I'm not interested in what they're saying, it's that I become uninterested over the fifteen minute long monologue I'm sitting through. However, they do get double bugger bonus points when they have to know it's something I never gave a monkeys about.

People who don't believe in brevity.

Gasbags.

Gas.

When you know on a rational level that it is time to take a shit before you go out but feel no urge to go. Then as soon as you leave the house you need to take a fat shit.

Have you ever read about how Octopuses come with a built-in toffee cannon that doubles as a propellant nozzle and ink gun? Meanwhile, despite evolving arses before mouths, our first colonists on Mars will be very unhappy indeed having nothing to wipe their arses with besides sand.

>>28868
I'm of the opposite annoyance. Contemporary language has been broken down in tandem with the rise modern communication platforms as we have come to take the very act of communication for granted. This leads us, in our vanity and fetish for the impersonal, to attempt to live as in a world of mechanical facts where chains of experience only serve as a hindrance.

As a result of this we can only understand others in terms of tropes, have little conception of what it means to be alive and face an utter incapacity to address modern identity politics in dialogue or public policy. Your painfully single woman at work is a classic scapegoat but is her prolixity due to conversational white noise or instead a failure of articulation coupled with deeper insecurities?

>>28872
An inability to recommend a film without summarising the whole plot or listing the A roads you took to buy garden furniture just make someone a poor story teller, nothing more. I'm sorry you wasted your time studying philosphy or are currently working under Jacob Reese-Mogg.

>>28873
I think he was just high.

This whole bullshit "cyclists vs drivers" war, wherein apparently it's OK to openly say you want to murder cyclists.

Yes, some cyclists are dickheads (and ones who run red lights, etc should be punished just the same as a driver), but so are some drivers. What we really need is a complete change of attitude.

Moving to Manchester for a job and on top of the fucking absolutely cunting EXTORTIONATE deposit for the place I'm going to rent, my car insurance is going to go up by a fucking grand, minimum. Fucking, brilliant. Where the fuck am I expected to pull £2k from as a recently graduated student? Now I know why people are still living with their parents at 40.

>>28876
Why didn't you think these things through before accepting the job?

>>28877
Because it's not like there are hundreds of jobs elsewhere. it's not like I won't be able to afford it once the money starts coming in but it's still a fucking pisstake.

For jobs in the field I want to go into, the only other place is London, and it's even worse there.

>>28876
Extortionate deposits are illegal now. They are capped at five weeks' rent. If you think that's a lot then you don't know how good you have it.

>>28879
Five weeks rent, plus the first months rent too on move in day is still a lot when you only have 8-12 hours a week working over summer and the dregs of a student loan.

Still, haggled with my insurance company to get it to 'only' go up by £500, which I can just about, if begrudgingly, swallow. When I was living in Manchester city centre, they wanted over £2k a year, so thank fuck it's not that.

>>28876

Lad I moved from a graduate job in Manchester to London actually and to be honest if you have to drive, by the time you've shelled out for cars etc as a young person day to day living costs aren't even that different.

That said if you're not from the north west get ready for the greyest, wettest existence you could ever imagine.

Car insurance is a rip off but even as a sensible driver lad, you can see why young lads get charged so much, nearly everytime I saw somebody do something recklessly irresponsible (not poor driving or a mistake but genuine not giving a fuck 'I know this might kill me and others' move) it has been other young lads.

Co-op have discontinued their tricolore fusilli, the utter shits.

>>28882
Seems a bit strange to care so much about crafting materials for primary school children.

>>28882

Tesco do a tricolore fusilli.