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>> No. 28571 Anonymous
17th May 2019
Friday 1:05 am
28571 Minor Rants and Piss-Offs, Mark VIII
It appears largethreadmodlad has also locked the previous iteration of this thread; Mark VIII it is, then.

I take perfect care of my nails. I don't bite them, I cut in the standard flat formation every 3-5 days, and scrub under them in the shower. So why the actual fuck are my cuticles bleeding? Putting the plaster over to catch the blood means I can't play my bass properly, and that pisses me off.
Expand all images.
>> No. 28572 Anonymous
17th May 2019
Friday 1:24 am
28572 spacer
>>28571
Almost 2 and half years ago to the day I was in a wheelchair and struggling to walk, I battled back to health but I still can't manage to cut my own toenails. It's a bridge too far for me, but it's embarrassing to ask for help so I keep ruining my socks and it annoys me. However, when I do ask my wife also soaks them, uses a pumice stone on them and moisturises them. I've noticed the cuticles and skin in general stays supple for a while.

Try using hand cream, like that Norwegian stuff for sailors.
>> No. 28573 Anonymous
17th May 2019
Friday 2:57 pm
28573 spacer
My brain's shit.
>> No. 28574 Anonymous
17th May 2019
Friday 3:14 pm
28574 spacer
>>28573
This.
>> No. 28575 Anonymous
17th May 2019
Friday 4:38 pm
28575 spacer
>>28571

I'd assume you answered your own question there. If your cuticle are always bleeding you might not be playing your bass properly anyway.
>> No. 28576 Anonymous
17th May 2019
Friday 5:21 pm
28576 spacer
>>28575
They aren't always bleeding; it's just a recent thing.
>> No. 28578 Anonymous
23rd May 2019
Thursday 5:42 pm
28578 spacer
PornHub's tendency to promote wannabe porn stars unwilling to show their face.
>> No. 28579 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 7:06 pm
28579 spacer
I'd kill every man here for a Kit Kat Chunky multipack.
>> No. 28581 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 7:26 pm
28581 spacer
>>28579
Do you like to munch four down like your'e having a massive regular 4-lane kitkat (that had become disconnected) ?
>> No. 28582 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 7:53 pm
28582 spacer
I'm okay with the SWP handing out their moronic

SOCIALIST WORKERS PARTY


Climate change is bad
signs at Extinction Rebellion protests because it's such a transparently manipulative thing to do people are immediately turned off by it, but it creates so much waste as the things break and are discarded at the end of the day. Nobody wants to take them home. Do the SWP stick around to gather them up and recycle them? Do they fuck. If you're going to try to hijack an environmental protest movement as a recruiting tool, at least act like you give a minimal shit about the environment.
Complete shower of cunts.
>> No. 28583 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 7:56 pm
28583 spacer
>>28582

What else are you going to burn on your traditional post-protest bonfire?
>> No. 28584 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 7:58 pm
28584 spacer
>>28583

SWP members.
>> No. 28585 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 7:59 pm
28585 spacer
>>28579

Double or nothing- Fight me in a duel for a multipack of peanut butter kitk kat chunkys.
>> No. 28586 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 8:25 pm
28586 spacer
>>28579>>28585

I'd splatter the both of you to have Cadbury's Fuse bars back.
>> No. 28587 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 8:48 pm
28587 spacer
>>28585
>>28586
I trained under the First Sword of Wrexham, inherited a khukuri from my Granddad and once beat Skyrim with an Argonian beserker build. It's quite clear I'm the most capable duelist on the board by some margin. If I looked hard enough I might even find the shield I made out of a Tie Fighter wing as a child.

Those Kit Kats are mine.
>> No. 28588 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 8:53 pm
28588 spacer
>>28587

I'm probably just going to drive to Tesco and buy some Kit Kats, if it's all the same to you lads.
>> No. 28589 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 8:55 pm
28589 spacer
>>28588
I declare this illegal.
>> No. 28590 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 9:03 pm
28590 spacer
Why don't we pronounce the "c" in "blancmange"?

>>28588
You are without honour.
>> No. 28591 Anonymous
24th May 2019
Friday 9:18 pm
28591 spacer
>>28590

And what is honour without chocolate?

blancmange pretty much literally translates to "white food" so the blanc in there is pronounced mostly how it is in french - without, or at least almost without the C.
>> No. 28593 Anonymous
25th May 2019
Saturday 12:02 am
28593 spacer
>>28588

Bring us some baccy while you're there mate. And some M&M crispies. They're on offer for a quid.
>> No. 28594 Anonymous
25th May 2019
Saturday 1:13 am
28594 spacer
>>28588
get us some bacon frazzles m8
>> No. 28595 Anonymous
25th May 2019
Saturday 12:07 pm
28595 spacer
Comment sections that are just references or repeats of whatever the poster has said in the past, only one in fifty is any good. See The Needle Drop and Limmy's Twitter for examples.
>> No. 28596 Anonymous
25th May 2019
Saturday 12:31 pm
28596 spacer
>>28595
Bounced on my boy's dick to this comment.
>> No. 28597 Anonymous
25th May 2019
Saturday 1:13 pm
28597 spacer
>>28596
http://www.nicememe.ca/
>> No. 28598 Anonymous
26th May 2019
Sunday 8:00 am
28598 spacer
Acid reflux so strong Rennie has no effect. It feels like I've swallowed a cocktail of paint stripper and battery acid. This is fucking excruciating.
>> No. 28599 Anonymous
26th May 2019
Sunday 8:26 am
28599 spacer
>>28598
This sounds counter-intuitive and contrary to what you would consider is common sense, but acid reflux is actually caused by too little acid in your stomach.
If your stomach isn't producing enough acid, bacteria and yeast are able to survive, their growth is what upsets the stomach and causes reflux up the throat.

Rennie only treats the symptoms, it lowers the acidity even more so that reflux is less painful, but it's not a cure.

The root cause of acid reflux is usually a salt deficiency. If you start to become deficient in salt, one of the ways your body will try and retain it is to produce less stomach acid.
>> No. 28600 Anonymous
26th May 2019
Sunday 11:57 pm
28600 spacer
Why you gotta' be setting your space shit in a whole new galaxy or something? There has to be some dumb wormhole-cum-slipspace-mega-tech for it to happen and our own solar system is easily interesting and diverse enough to support a whole game or film or whatever. And don't talk to me about no stupid aliens; aliens always just end up acting like space Fascists, space hippies or autistic physicists regardless of how big of a universe you put them in. Except the Quarians, they were kind of unique.
>> No. 28601 Anonymous
27th May 2019
Monday 1:45 am
28601 spacer
>>28598
You need ranitidine and Lansoprazole, Pepto Bismol in a bind. Rennies are a complete con job and don’t work.
>> No. 28602 Anonymous
31st May 2019
Friday 8:52 pm
28602 spacer
A couple of parental gripes.

1. They refuse to pay for gift aid when they go places but then complain that this means they don't qualify for an annual pass. Just pay the extra ~10% and return as many times as you want in the next 12 months for free rather than fixating on getting in cheaper on this occasion.

2. For my birthday I've provided them with a list of books on my 'to read' list and stressed that I'd prefer used ones as they're much cheaper so they'd be able to buy a lot more. They bought me two new books when they could have got around ten for that price if they were savvy, plus if I'd known they weren't going to get them all I'd have hinted at other people to get them rather than things I'd have preferred less
I realise giving them a list for my birthday sounds a bit cuntish, but my family always outright tells one another what we want for presents.
>> No. 28603 Anonymous
31st May 2019
Friday 11:56 pm
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>>28602
Bloody parents, acting as if you wouldn't be there if not for them.
>> No. 28604 Anonymous
1st June 2019
Saturday 1:55 am
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>>28603
Precisely, they're to blame for everything.
>> No. 28605 Anonymous
1st June 2019
Saturday 2:17 am
28605 spacer
>>28603
I fucking hate this shit. When I were a a teenlad, they'd often call me ungrateful, that I wouldn't be there if not for them, etc. While I was probably being a bit of a twat, I never got that argument.

I never asked to be brought into the world, so I don't see why I should be in any way grateful for it. Life is the worst gift you can give anyone.
>> No. 28606 Anonymous
1st June 2019
Saturday 7:20 am
28606 spacer
>>28605

My mother has tried to make me feel guilty or that I owe her something for bringing me into the world, raising me, spending money on me etc. I always tell her I very much wish she hadn't bothered, and it's not exactly like I had a say in any of it. It's daft really, if it was that bad she should have thought about that before she got up the duff, or at least poisoned me as a baby.
>> No. 28607 Anonymous
1st June 2019
Saturday 7:22 am
28607 spacer
My kindle updated itself and I lost all my non-amazon store books. What a fucking cunt on.
>> No. 28608 Anonymous
1st June 2019
Saturday 10:11 am
28608 spacer
>>28606
Enjoy your low social credit and not being able to apply for a fishing license.
>> No. 28609 Anonymous
1st June 2019
Saturday 12:50 pm
28609 spacer
>>28607
Was it supposed to do that? Mine is almost exclusively used to read "legally acquired" books I've dumped in the /documents/ folder not store purchases, it'd be a pain in the arse if a software upgrade fucked with that. Although I do keep it in airplane mode to maximise battery life.
>> No. 28610 Anonymous
1st June 2019
Saturday 3:13 pm
28610 spacer
>>28609

I'm not sure. It was in my pocket at work and must have unlocked as I was moving about, when I next looked at it, it had three different updates done on it and all my "legally acquired" books were gone. I'm starting to think I must have caused it to factory reset while it was jiggling around in my pocket.
>> No. 28611 Anonymous
2nd June 2019
Sunday 12:43 am
28611 spacer
>>28610
You may want to check your library settings on the website and see if those legally acquired books are registered or not. Most ebook sellers can let their books be used through Kindle directly, via a link that you provide from that service to Amazon. I've bought a few collections from Humble that have worked this way.
>> No. 28612 Anonymous
2nd June 2019
Sunday 11:47 pm
28612 spacer
Right, I've held off long enough about the weather but this is getting silly now. Its not the heat but the godawful humidity that has had me feeling clammy and disgusting all day. And my hair is in an even worse state!

What preparations have you lads made for the coming months of sunshine-hot-hot?
>> No. 28613 Anonymous
3rd June 2019
Monday 1:24 am
28613 spacer
>>28612

Shaved my head, got a job outside, and bought an air conditioner for the shed.
>> No. 28614 Anonymous
3rd June 2019
Monday 10:01 am
28614 spacer
>>28612
Bought emergency blankets to cover the windows during the day.
>> No. 28615 Anonymous
3rd June 2019
Monday 5:22 pm
28615 spacer
Fucking estate agents fucking me abouT.

We went round, after the estate agent gave us all that about "getting in quick because there's a lot of interest". Bloody tennants gave the game away straight away by telling us we were the first ones to come look. We called up to say we'd take it literally straight away, they said they'd call us back, and what do you know, they've still gone and given it to someone else.

What is wrong with these people. What is their fucking game.
>> No. 28616 Anonymous
3rd June 2019
Monday 5:55 pm
28616 spacer
Why the fuck is PC gaming not simple anymore. It seems like so many companies are cutting corners and doing bad ports and badly optimised games for PC now. For days it took me about half an hour to start up one of two games, fiddle about with the settings so that it works THIS time, then I get to play for an hour before encountering some issue. Two games now. Two games I've paid for and can barely play due to updates that have rendered them buggy as fuck. Even did a clean install of Windows recently, nothing is conflicting on my end, a game update happens and fucks everything. It shouldn't be a bleeding chore to relax during some precious free time.
>> No. 28617 Anonymous
3rd June 2019
Monday 7:39 pm
28617 spacer
>>28616
This is why you end up at PS4/Xbox instead - I don't want to fiddle with DirectX drivers and debug nine kinds of shit just to play a game; I do that all day at work.
>> No. 28618 Anonymous
4th June 2019
Tuesday 1:28 am
28618 spacer
>>28615
I'm not sure if you have to be a cunt before you become an estate agent, or the job turns you into one.
>> No. 28619 Anonymous
4th June 2019
Tuesday 8:18 am
28619 spacer
>>28615
I don't get it - so was there lots of interest or not?
>> No. 28620 Anonymous
4th June 2019
Tuesday 9:11 am
28620 spacer
>>28619

I think what happened is they basically forgot about us; we phoned first thing Saturday morning, they told us they'd get back to us when they'd spoken to the landlord. Then when we hadn't heard anything by Monday we called back and they said it had been taken. We know we were the first viewers, so unless someone had taken it without viewing we should also have been the first to express interest. Which means we should have fucking got it.

I wish my utter cynicism wasn't always right, but I think it's just one of those cases. I trusted Leanne to ring us back; what I should really have done is trusted my instincts that Leanne is a slack fucking bint and called her back every half hour until she got her shit together.

I normally wouldn't be so annoyed about this but the house was in the perfect location for me and the Mrs to both have a decent commute; all of our other options either leave me slogging through traffic for ages or her getting a long convoluted bus/train route.

>>28618

Both.
>> No. 28621 Anonymous
4th June 2019
Tuesday 9:41 am
28621 spacer
>>28618
the weasel I'm dealing with for a car lease could easily be an estate agent on the side. He's completely uninterested in actually doing his fucking job, keeps telling me that he was on annual leave again, so another week's passed with him failing to do an easy 10 minutes work. Get the puncture fixed, schedule the delivery. 3 weeks and counting. Cunt. I'm going to have to rent something to tide me over.
>> No. 28622 Anonymous
4th June 2019
Tuesday 11:51 am
28622 spacer
If there is one thing worse than a train arriving late it is a train leaving early. I regret having not gone to expain the fundamentals of their job to the platform manager whilst waiting for the next one.
>> No. 28623 Anonymous
4th June 2019
Tuesday 12:02 pm
28623 spacer
Described myself as "ace" to a bunch of alternative sorts online last night, as in a really cool fighter pilot or the best card in a deck.

About half-an-hour later I realised everyone had thought I'd come out as asexual.

http://www.whatisasexuality.com/am-i-ace/teen/
>> No. 28624 Anonymous
4th June 2019
Tuesday 6:19 pm
28624 spacer
>>28622
Wouldn't happen to be King's Cross would it? The absolute gobshites have tried to catch me out a few times with a train I've pre-booked tickets on arriving and subsequently leaving early.
>> No. 28625 Anonymous
4th June 2019
Tuesday 7:35 pm
28625 spacer
>>28624
Not him but I have also run into this problem at King's Cross more than once (and not elsewhere).
>> No. 28626 Anonymous
5th June 2019
Wednesday 3:11 am
28626 spacer
It's the night before an exam and I don't think I have ever felt more awake.

If there is any evidence to sya we as humans aren't created by an intelligent being it would be the fact that sleep, something apparently essential to our existence, is also completely fucking impossible when we need it the most.
>> No. 28627 Anonymous
5th June 2019
Wednesday 5:30 am
28627 spacer
>>28622
>>28624
>>28625
There are signs up about doors being locked a certain amount of time before departure. I remember they used to say 30 seconds, thought I've seen 40 and 60 elsewhere. I've heard that in some places they've put it up to a piss-taking 90 seconds. As soon as the doors are locked, the driver is free to go as long as the guard agrees and the signals are clear. The timetable already has more padding than a typical England batting line-up, so if you're having to leave early just to not arrive late someone has fucked up massively somewhere.

In fairness, it should be noted that the departure time shown in the timetable is just that: departure time, as in wheels rolling. That said, the working timetable has "advertised to leave X minutes early" (i.e. the public timetable shows an earlier time) as a standard note so I don't know why they don't just use that if delays on starting out are such a problem.
>> No. 28628 Anonymous
5th June 2019
Wednesday 4:33 pm
28628 spacer
I largely dodged the post-adolecsent problem of embarrassing email handles, but occasionally I'll get a message using a name I chose out of a bad poem, or I'll have to use my back up email which is basically "DelicateUnicornBoy@supernet.co.uk".
>> No. 28629 Anonymous
5th June 2019
Wednesday 5:54 pm
28629 spacer
>>28628
I've just noticed that my email recovery address is a years old mailbox on a server I no longer have access to. I'd better not lose that 64-character random password I set.
>> No. 28630 Anonymous
5th June 2019
Wednesday 7:07 pm
28630 spacer
Speaking of emails, I created a new Gmail account on Friday to apply for jobs. I've only submitted my details for a position at a local council and I'm already getting spam; that job application is literally the only thing linked to the account.
>> No. 28631 Anonymous
5th June 2019
Wednesday 7:24 pm
28631 spacer
>>28630
I had this last time I was looking for a job.
Cunts, all of them.
>> No. 28632 Anonymous
5th June 2019
Wednesday 8:38 pm
28632 spacer
>>28630
You know how hackers try brute-forcing passwords? Spammers do the same thing with email addresses these days. They know that sbennett@ is a valid address, so they'll start tacking numbers on the end because that's what people do when names aren't available.
>> No. 28633 Anonymous
7th June 2019
Friday 6:08 am
28633 spacer
I have a parcel that is in customs, it's had it it's charges worked out but it seems the fuckers just gave up after that and forgot about it since it hasn't moved since.
>> No. 28634 Anonymous
7th June 2019
Friday 4:16 pm
28634 spacer
Saw a brochure from a business calling themselves "Labradoors, an Electric Garage Door Comapny", with a wee silhouette of a dog for a logo. They stuck with that name so I can only assume whoever thought of it kept their job. Shocking.
>> No. 28635 Anonymous
7th June 2019
Friday 5:13 pm
28635 spacer
>>28634

Well you've remembered it and just gave them free advertising and now I remember it. Seems less stupid now.
>> No. 28636 Anonymous
7th June 2019
Friday 5:33 pm
28636 spacer
>>28635
I knew some smug cunt was going to say that. I look forward to seeing your new garage doors in a future thread.
>> No. 28638 Anonymous
8th June 2019
Saturday 4:02 pm
28638 spacer
>>28636
hahahaha
>> No. 28639 Anonymous
9th June 2019
Sunday 1:11 am
28639 spacer
>>28634
Fuck, now I'm thinking of it too. Was it your bloody idea? It was, wasn't it? Is this stage II, the viral marketing campaign targeting Britain's most influential and widespread forums? Jog on, shill.
>> No. 28640 Anonymous
9th June 2019
Sunday 2:41 pm
28640 spacer
Okay, that's it, I'm adding paid advertising to the site. This time next year we'll all be millionaires etc.
>> No. 28641 Anonymous
9th June 2019
Sunday 5:50 pm
28641 spacer

download (4).jpg
286412864128641

>> No. 28642 Anonymous
9th June 2019
Sunday 6:07 pm
28642 spacer
>>28641

Seeing that image made the jingle automatically start playing in my head.
>> No. 28643 Anonymous
11th June 2019
Tuesday 8:41 pm
28643 spacer
I've been trying to get into newfangled things like Reddit and Twitter, because I feel old and all the websites I post on are slowly dying.

Everything about it is boiling my piss. Posting restrictions and arbitrary conditions, with posts just getting auto-deleted if you fail to meet them. Fuck me. I mean I can see why it's probably necessary but it's infuriating.
>> No. 28644 Anonymous
11th June 2019
Tuesday 8:57 pm
28644 spacer
>>28643
I've been trying to get into the UKPersonalFinance sub on Reddit after seeing it mentioned a few times on here, which is my first experience of the place. However, I've seen some dangerous advice given by people who don't know what they're talking about and the threads are largely repetitive; it's mainly either "got a lump sum, what do?" or humble-bragging about how much they earn.
>> No. 28645 Anonymous
11th June 2019
Tuesday 11:43 pm
28645 spacer
>>28644
It seems to me that reddit is mostly home to youngsters and/or neophytes, with the more knowledgable types congregating on old-style niche forums. Even imageboards are better because they tend to attract obsessive autists.
>> No. 28646 Anonymous
11th June 2019
Tuesday 11:44 pm
28646 spacer
>>28644
>I've seen some dangerous advice given by people who don't know what they're talking about

On Reddit??? Never!!!

Good thing they dont have subreddits about political issues or anything important like that.
>> No. 28647 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 1:32 am
28647 spacer
>>28645

You do tend to see a lot of "hahaha remember (thing)" type memes on Reddit, where the joke is that the thing is meant to have been ages ago but it was only actually two or three years. There's also a lot of that weird "oh man I've seen some SHIT" attitude from people who probably don't even know what goatse, tubgirl or 2girls1cup were.

I just don't like the internet any more, I think.
>> No. 28648 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 1:51 am
28648 spacer
>>28647

Their front page is full of people sneering at people doing stupid things when you get the impression those doing the sneering are only mildly more intelligent.
>> No. 28649 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 1:59 am
28649 spacer
>>28647

When I think about explosive diarrhea, it gives me a stabbing pain in my upper inner right thigh where it meets the groin. Tubgirl is one of two images which causes me physical pain. I can't find the other again but it was a screenshot of someone's facebook status saying she had just learned that cleaning diarrhea off Ben's scrotum was like scraping butter of an English muffin. I assume Ben was a baby.
>> No. 28650 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 2:40 am
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stephen the fry.jpg
286502865028650
>>28649
>When I think about explosive diarrhea, it gives me a stabbing pain in my upper inner right thigh where it meets the groin.

You are now breathing manually and blinking manually.
You just lost The Game.
You are now thinking of explosive diarrhea.
>> No. 28651 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 6:29 am
28651 spacer
>>28646
>Good thing they dont have subreddits about political issues or anything important like that.

We're not much better in that respect. If you look at, say, the Syria threads or just about any thread on /pol/ or /news/ that are a few years old it's clear that the posters who try to come across as experts and knowledgeable in that field were completely pulling it out of their arse. Some of it is spectacularly inaccurate. In hindsight, the Syria threads seem like we've been infiltrated by Russians or Russian sympathisers.
>> No. 28652 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 3:05 pm
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why.png
286522865228652
Feels like a dig when I get told to watch shit like this.
>> No. 28653 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 5:14 pm
28653 spacer
>>28651

I think reddit biggest problem is the circle jerk. Opposing position regardless of quality get down voted to oblivion ones that are fundamentally stupid but preach to the choir are promoted into the stratosphere.

What makes this worse is that this is by design. The 'wrong' popular threads are are deleted before they ever hit the front of r/all there are various things that that track this now like r/undelete

There is a secret admin group I think its called something as Orwellian as 'anti-evil' that manages this policy.

So when you see another anti vax are so dumb, next marvel movie great thread it is there by design.
>> No. 28654 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 5:52 pm
28654 spacer
Parcelforce decided to reschedule my delivery without telling me.

Wankers.
>> No. 28655 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 6:55 pm
28655 spacer
I feel slightly guilty about being slightly shitty to a chugger on my way home. She accosted me in the train station with the line "Are you friendly?". A somewhat curt "no" did nothing to temper her enthusiasm to "just start a conversation", nor did my reply "I don't mean to be rude, but I'm not interested in whatever you're pitching and just want to wait for my train in peace". I backed away, but she started literally following me around the station concourse. I ended up explaining in detail why both the charity she was raising money for and the overheads of street fundraising offer extremely poor value for money to donors and have a detrimental effect on the charitable sector as a whole; she just looked sad and slightly ashamed and didn't know what to say.

I shouldn't have made a stranger's day worse for no real reason, but her sheer persistence really wound me up.
>> No. 28656 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 6:58 pm
28656 spacer

Screenshot 2019-06-12 at 18.55.59.png
286562865628656
>>28652

I really wish that YouTube would stop promoting conspiracy theory bollocks. A search for "international space station" no longer returns a page full of videos "proving" that the ISS is a hoax, so at least they're doing something, but they don't seem to be trying particularly hard to deal with the dangerous pseudoscientific bollocks that litters their platform.
>> No. 28657 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 7:21 pm
28657 spacer
>>28656
Bottom line is they don't give a shit unless it gets them bad publicity and threatens their revenue.
>> No. 28659 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 7:50 pm
28659 spacer
>>28653

I've only been using it about a week but I've already come to much the same conclusion. User voting seems like a great idea at first, until you realise that the users are mostly morons, and having them vote just encourages moronic posts to be voted up because they have the right memes in them.
>> No. 28660 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 7:57 pm
28660 spacer
>>28656
>Imagine playing a co-op shooter like Fortnite Battle Royale or PUB-G with on a VR headset... in real time, with zero lag
Okay, I'm imagining it. Now what?
>> No. 28661 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 7:58 pm
28661 spacer
>>28653
I like how you've cleverly posted the most obvious, oft-repeated and shallow criticisms of reddit. Very meta.
>> No. 28662 Anonymous
12th June 2019
Wednesday 8:29 pm
28662 spacer
>>28655
I hope you don't mind me saying but I'd shake your hand if I could. These arseholes come and knock on my door (at least twice just in the past couple of weeks) and if I say "Sorry I'm not buying anything" the moment I can see they have a clipboard or whatever and go to close the door they say "I'm not selling anything", one of them pointed to his t-shirt with the charity logo on it as he said it.

I think people without serious issues around simply ignoring the boundaries of others don't last long in the job or are reluctant to take it in the first place.
>> No. 28663 Anonymous
13th June 2019
Thursday 12:36 am
28663 spacer
One asked me if I was friendly. I said "moderately" and kept walking and that was that. Maybe that's the magic word somehow.
>> No. 28664 Anonymous
13th June 2019
Thursday 12:39 am
28664 spacer
>>28663

I think it's a sales technique where they start with a question you can't say no to. One tried to sell me a dodgy photocopied book of jokes and started with "Do you like a laugh?". I said no and they looked baffled.
>> No. 28665 Anonymous
13th June 2019
Thursday 12:42 am
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>>28664

One was saying peculiar things to me about what we had in common like he used to have the same bag as me and when he asked my hometown he said his fellow chugger was from the same place. I was baffled he thought I was supposed to care.
>> No. 28666 Anonymous
13th June 2019
Thursday 12:43 am
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>>28665

I just typo'd chigger before I fixed it.


>> No. 28667 Anonymous
13th June 2019
Thursday 9:52 am
28667 spacer
>>28665
I think these people have a training course which is just being read a condensed to one page of bulletpoints version of How to win friends & influence people. Most likely it's missing the one very important bulletpoint that explains if people can tell even on a subconscious level that you're trying to manipulate them then it'll make them dislike you far more than if you were just plainly asking.
>> No. 28668 Anonymous
13th June 2019
Thursday 5:27 pm
28668 spacer
>>28667

I've done a few shit sales type jobs in my time, from cold-calling flogging iPads to door knocking for market research.

The one thing they've always had in common is that the sales training they give you is utterly ineffective, and about twenty years behind what people have already become used to just saying no to immediately. There are two type of people who succeed at sales- Either you're a genuine "people person" with the ability to chat shit to anyone, or you have Derren Brown level powers of suggestion and essentially jedi mind trick people into agreeing with you.

The one most essential thing they never teach is that you really can't rescue a pitch from someone who's flat out not interested. I'm not sure why this obvious fact escapes the people responsible for training, but it's for this reason that you get those godawful jar-shakers who try it on even when you basically tell them to fuck off. The training always tries to tell you it's worth a shot and that you have to be persistent, with some semi-mythical bullshit about landing that massive sale from what at first seemed to be a dead end; but it's simply a waste of time. It's always far more efficient to just cut it off and knock on the next door/call the next person etc.
>> No. 28671 Anonymous
13th June 2019
Thursday 7:52 pm
28671 spacer
>>28655
>I ended up explaining in detail why both the charity she was raising money for and the overheads of street fundraising offer extremely poor value for money to donors and have a detrimental effect on the charitable sector as a whole; she just looked sad and slightly ashamed and didn't know what to say.
The correct action here would have been to just say in a slightly raised voice "look, just fuck off and leave me alone". 100% success rate, and shouldn't ruin their day.
>> No. 28672 Anonymous
13th June 2019
Thursday 10:30 pm
28672 spacer
>>28668
They did when I did cold-calling back in 2010 or so. The word was 'negs'. Negs aren't gonna get you a sale no matter what, so waste as little time on them as possible and move on, checking their house number off the list as you go. The absolute worst thing to encounter were COWS: Cannot Operate Without Spouse. They're really interested, spend ages talking to you (and not in the facetious way people sometimes do with telemarketers) but get terrified as soon as paperwork comes out, at which point they need to consult with the other half who is never present. I was selling TalkTalk packages I should mention, so it wasn't just a case of getting them to part with some cash and then leaving, it involved another phone call to TT themselves.

Absolutely horrible job, I'll never forget it. You're bothering almost everyone who answers the door and it makes you feel rotten after a while, though genuine abuse is surprisingly rare in this country at least. I'm a lot nicer to such people now if they come to the door - I'll at least chat with for a minute about the job while making it clear I'm not going to buying anything. Also it tears your feet to shreds and half the time you'll work 9 hours with 15 minutes for lunch and make absolutely no money at all.
>> No. 28673 Anonymous
14th June 2019
Friday 2:21 am
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>>28672
What is the quickest, easiest way to be identified as a 'neg'?
>> No. 28674 Anonymous
14th June 2019
Friday 2:53 am
28674 spacer
>>28673
"Sorry, not interested" while already closing the door. I don't think it matters on you though, it's about the training the person has gotten. We were told to use our instincts and if someone was clearly not going to budge then move on asap. Seems like many of the above posters are referring to chuggers and such who've been told the key is chirpy persistence. In that case try lobbing a brick.
>> No. 28675 Anonymous
14th June 2019
Friday 3:05 am
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>>28673
A very quick "no thank you" and walk off/close the door. There is no need to be British levels of polite at this.
>> No. 28676 Anonymous
14th June 2019
Friday 8:58 am
28676 spacer
>>28673

Mention it on the Grindr profile.
>> No. 28677 Anonymous
16th June 2019
Sunday 1:07 am
28677 spacer
The word "fierce".
>> No. 28678 Anonymous
16th June 2019
Sunday 1:47 am
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quote-sometimes-you-look-back-at-girls-you-spent-m.jpg
286782867828678
If you ever feel bad about being single then just look at your bank balance. Fucking hell does pussy put a dent in your finances like little else.

She's in the same boat
>> No. 28679 Anonymous
16th June 2019
Sunday 11:36 am
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>>28678
I'm a virgin in his mid 20s and my bank balance is still shit. Student finance will do that to you. That said, I've seen some of my peers working off overdraft for years after uni; thank fuck I'm not in that position.
>> No. 28680 Anonymous
16th June 2019
Sunday 2:18 pm
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It's been sunny and dry all morning but within 10 seconds of me leaving the house it starts FUCKING PISSING IT FUCKING DOWN. FUCK THIS FUCKING PLACE. CUNT.
>> No. 28681 Anonymous
16th June 2019
Sunday 6:45 pm
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>>28680
The sun is out for the first time in days here. Muggy and humid though, could be a storm coming.
>> No. 28682 Anonymous
16th June 2019
Sunday 8:34 pm
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>>28678

People always say this but I've never really got that. If anything my girlfriends have saved me money by taking my time and attention away from my many expensive hobbies. I also tend to go out with women who have jobs and are capable of supporting themselves. And back in the day, splitting the rent and bills worked out cheaper too.

I did buy my current missus a car though, now you mention it. Hmm.
>> No. 28683 Anonymous
16th June 2019
Sunday 8:35 pm
28683 spacer
>>28680

It did that here too and I actually went to stand in the rain, it was a welcome change from the horrible humidity. There was a proper nice clear rainbow when it rained too.
>> No. 28685 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 11:17 am
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People who self-identify as "nerds" or "geeks" with their entire personality revolving around buying pieces of cardboard and plastic from Games Workshop, Wizards of the Coast Hasbro, Funko Inc or Disney's Star Wars division.
They're not bad people but it is purely rampant popular consumerism and not the harmless niche hobbies they believe it is.
>> No. 28686 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 11:37 am
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>>28685

I think they are bad people. They adopted the culture of people who were social pariahs, but decided they still wanted to treat them as social pariah. The people who used to be called geeks and nerds when it was a pejorative are now called neckbeards instead, and people still treat them like shit even though they have stolen their identity.

I remember hearing the statement on QI of all places "Counter culture is just out sourced R&D for capitalism" and it's true.

What was authentic is reduced down to a lifestyle you can buy and faking will make you popular.

Mind you it isn't as bad as people who wear not seeing star wars like a badge of honor as if cultural ignorance was an achievement and an identity.
>> No. 28687 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 12:07 pm
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>>28685

I'd agree, but I don't think you'll find many of those people putting in the effort to assemble and paint Games Workshop minis. That takes too much effort and genuine investment, when what these people are looking for is a convenient label and culture to fit into, in lieu of a personality of their own.

You might find them in drop-in DnD campaigns at those trendy little geek cafés that sell imported Pop Tarts. It takes less homework. But mostly they just make sure they have plenty of Marvel posters up around the house and watch Star Wars a couple of times.

>>28686

I also agree with this. Being a geek or nerd hasn't been more acceptable, normal people have simply appropriated the term.

See also: Tattoos, facial piercings, keeping reptiles as pets, pop punk, rockabilly fashion, riding a motorbike when you've only done your CBT... Maybe the circles I move in are just too full of tedious overgrown student hipster cunts, but I've definitely noticed that people just seem to pick whatever "alternative" identity they think appeals to them right off the shelf nowadays.
>> No. 28690 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 12:15 pm
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>>28687

You left off rock climbing it is both the thing to put on your dating profile to seem exciting, and the rock climbing centre is also the place to hang out like it is a coffee shop with your laptop, not doing any climbing.

>motorbike when you've only done your CBT

I didn't think you needed to be into more darker shit than cock and ball torture to be cool enough for a motorcycle but I'll take your word for it.
>> No. 28691 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 12:16 pm
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>>28686

I haven't seen Star Wars (I think I saw the Phantom Menace when I was about 13) but I typically pretend I have, because it's just not worth the hassle. I'm sure they're very good, but I already know what happens and I'm sort of put off by the idea that they're 'important'.

When it comes to hobbies and interests I'm probably an 'actual' nerd by the traditional definition, with interests such as soldering together my own synthesisers, building radio antenna, and reading books with CGI spaceships as cover art and long, vague titles. I try not to mention this stuff to anyone (other than places like here) because I know that rarely people care. I've made the mistake of being asked what I do for a hobby and answering honestly, and by the time you've explained what a Raspberry Pi is any why you have one stuck to your roof with bits of copper sticking out of it, they think you're a murderer. Luckily I have more vague things I can say like 'music' or 'photography' without mentioning modular synthesis or MAX/msp or developing your own film. I suppose there must be a lot of 'sleeper nerds' like this.

Anyway, I know a lad who's never had a Big Mac and likes to mention that at almost every opportunity. People seem to care, too. "oh my god! That's crazy!" fuck off, he's missing out on an quite good, three quid burger, that's just a mistake on his part, not an interesting fact.
>> No. 28692 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 12:20 pm
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>>28687

>right off the shelf nowadays

I suspect it's always been like this, just it used to be a bit more local. My mum didn't invent being a goth, and likely only did it because she knew ten other goths. Maybe she had to dye her own clothes black or whatever but the idea was the same, she was dressing and acting like a load of her mates. I think youth culture must be a lot more diffuse these days, as you can obviously access and assimilate any culture worldwide. Back in the day you might never have been a punk if your city didn't have a record shop that sold punk albums or you couldn't pick up the one radio station playing that sort of thing. Now you can be fully and exclusively into Brazilian acid funk and pretend that's the only thing that speaks to you.
>> No. 28693 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 12:42 pm
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>>28689
>I haven't seen Star Wars (I think I saw the Phantom Menace when I was about 13) but I typically pretend I have, because it's just not worth the hassle. I'm sure they're very good, but I already know what happens and I'm sort of put off by the idea that they're 'important'.

By no means was my comment about not seeing star wars an attack on people who haven't seen star wars. You keep doing you.

Apologies for the following rant you've awakened something in me by your statement.

The truth is there are 3 good star wars films (really only 2 are exceptional cinema but the third rounds off the story very well). But they have been fucked around with both by re-editing, and by expansion of the cannon since in ways that ruin them.

You would be hard pressed now to find a version of the original star wars that hadn't been fucked with in post in a way that ruins the tone and pace without knowing what you were looking for, so if you are happy where you are I wouldn't even start, but they are up there with seven samurai in terms of quality story telling.

As for how the expansion of cannon fucked them, firstly the force and Jedi knights were originally talked about in vague and mystical terms and it really helped sell a meta spiritual idea that 'if you are true of heart you are strong with the force' that the audiance related with but later the force was explained away as a physical property in the blood, and the Jedi knights became interstellar police. Essentially without changing the films in that sense they have fucked the meaning behind them.

The audience didn't understand the difference between what is psychologically exciting and what is visually spectacular so equated them with each other. The light sabre battles are nothing visually impressive in the originals but carry a lot of emotional and narrative weight and some how people have mentally equated what they felt with it being more visually interesting but have ignored the underlying importance. what has resulted in later movies when the people who grew up with them started making them is kind of like how a Michael Bay fight makes you feel bored because you are just watching the fight coordinators and FX team jerk off.
>> No. 28694 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 1:21 pm
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>>28692
>I suspect it's always been like this

It clearly wasn't back in the days of the Nazis hanging the Edelweiss Pirates, and US riot police coming into Jazz clubs to 'beat up n!ggers', But I could understand you believing these things given what things have been like in living memory.


> My mum didn't invent being a goth, and likely only did it because she knew ten other goths
You've made the fallacy and it is an understandable one of equating fashion and the cultural trappings of culture with culture. You make this mistake because a lot of what you are told about these things are by people who don't care about any sort of underlying ideology, but only want to sell something.

Take for example what we have been talking about geek and nerds. Is there anything outwardly expressive in reading a comic, or molding a railway or sticking a raspberry pi on your roof for reasons I don't pretend to understand? No it is something of a personal journey a hobby, that is what defines a culture even if they look no different from anyone else. When someone starts wearing a t-shirt with Batman on though, we get into an interesting discussion though as to why they are. Are their motives wholly personal expression, is it just something they picked because it looked cool or trendy, or some mixture of both. (I'm currently wearing a pokemone t-shirt it is my fravorite shirt, but the pokemon on it is obscure enough and the design naff enough I don't feel like I'm broadcasting any sort of street cred).

Capitalism will always step in and try sell you the band tour T-shirt like it was the same thing as being there. It is up to us to recognize the difference without being snooty pricks about it to people who show up later.
>> No. 28695 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 2:13 pm
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PAYG phone top-ups at cash machines have just quietly been discontinued. EE gave me no warning at all. I just learned today when I tried it on two different cash machines.

https://community.o2.co.uk/t5/Pay-As-You-Go/ATM-top-ups-being-discontinued/td-p/1220499

(Not my photo. Just grabbed it off that forum thread.)
>> No. 28696 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 2:16 pm
28696 spacer
>>28694

It seems we're talking about two different things.
>> No. 28697 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 2:36 pm
28697 spacer
>>28696

we aren't, we were orginally talking about Geek culture and branding, and the idea of selling someone an identity they can pick up and have, and I deconstructed that as to the difference between actually having an identity and merely having the appearance of one. Goth is largely just fashion and art around the macabre so it won't ever really be deeper than that, but there are deeper interests that are co-opted and sold which was the original examples.

Of course if you use an example that is heavily linked to the record industry at a time at the height of their power you are going to find nothing once you dig below the surface your mistake is assuming everything is like that.
>> No. 28698 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 2:53 pm
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>>28697

You're trying really hard to be right, I'll give you that much.
>> No. 28699 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 3:23 pm
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>>28698

Well since you havent expanded your point or explained yourself at all I must presume you don't actually have a coherent one to make. You are just saying no it isn't.
>> No. 28700 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 5:01 pm
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>>28699

I don't have the energy to argue over a point I never made, lad.
>> No. 28701 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 5:15 pm
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You're both getting locked in the shed until you've learnt to get along.
>> No. 28702 Anonymous
25th June 2019
Tuesday 10:11 pm
28702 spacer
>>28701

I can get along with him just FINE! it's HIM who can't get along with ME!
>> No. 28703 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 7:19 am
28703 spacer
>>28653
>I think reddit biggest problem is the circle jerk. Opposing position regardless of quality get down voted to oblivion ones that are fundamentally stupid but preach to the choir are promoted into the stratosphere.

>What makes this worse is that this is by design. The 'wrong' popular threads are are deleted before they ever hit the front of r/all there are various things that that track this now like r/undelete.

Visitors to the The_Donald message board, which describes itself as “a never-ending rally dedicated to the 45th President of the United States, Donald J Trump” and has more than 750,000 subscribers, will be greeted with a message about the reasons for the quarantine before they can click through to the site. The quarantine also restricts the message board, known as a subreddit, from generating revenue and limits its popular posts from reaching an audience in other parts of Reddit.

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2019/jun/26/reddit-the-donald-trump-quarantined-subreddit
>> No. 28704 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 7:49 am
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I love living in London. It's genuinely given me a new lease of life.

It's busy, it's fun, it's exciting, there's always somebody around, something to do.

The only drawback, and admittedly it is a big one, is that room mates you get are fucking useless. It is absolutely mindblowing the kind of manchildren that inhabit this earth and cannot live like an adult.

Our flat literally has a paid cleaner who comes every other week, leaves the place spotless, so that means for two weeks if you wash up after yourself and wipe up any major spills we're pretty much golden and our flat looks great.

Without failure, two days in, one housemate seems to make it his mission to shit up the side of the bowl and leave it and the other just fucking trashes the kitchen and doesn't wash up. These people are in their mid 30s and it's fucking embarrassing having to ask them to sort their shit.

I only take solace in the fact that they will probably die alone as no self-respecting woman/partner would ever survive them long term.
>> No. 28705 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 8:28 am
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>>28704
My housemate behaves similarly. I don't think he's doing it on purpose but is just oblivious. I made this last night, currently considering the pros and cons of putting it on the fridge. The idea is to put a name and date on there every time I do one of the things on it to draw attention to how much housework actually takes place and how little they're doing.
I wanted to include "Cleaned up someone else's beard hair", "Mopped piss off the floor", "Cleaned oven", "Re-washed dishes that weren't cleaned properly", "Wiped kitchen counter", "Hoovered" and some other things but there isn't really space for it.
>> No. 28706 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 10:23 am
28706 spacer
>>28705

Christ, the re-washed thing strikes a chord more than anything. When they do finally wash up they basically dip whatever needs washing in and out of water and then leave it to dry, with half of their last meal still on it.

The thing I don't get is it takes no effort at all to wash up and live in a nice place. It takes what, 20 seconds per item max? Maybe slightly longer for big items. Then it's done, don't have to stare at it and eventually has to get done anyway so just o it.

I think your approach might be slightly passive aggressive though, I've had best results by just confronting it and saying 'you need to wash up I don't want to live like this, you're 35'. Basically the shame card.

Having said that the same cycle repeats after a few weeks so maybe you might be right to log it.

I'll revert back to my bitterness, he talks about how when he buys his own flat and shows me pictures of nice flats he uses for inspiration and all I can think is how his will look nothing like that because it will be a fucking mess.

I also find it really annoying two of us pay the rent for a place that isn't particularly great, but it's location is right by work, so it makes sense, this man is paying premium rate and doesn't even work near here, so what's the point?.
>> No. 28707 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 10:39 am
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>>28706
>I've had best results by just confronting it and saying 'you need to wash up I don't want to live like this, you're 35'. Basically the shame card.
Our chatlog is already just a history of me asking him to clean up after himself. Usually he gets the message but I hate having to nag like this about obvious things that shouldn't need mentioning.
>> No. 28708 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 10:44 am
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>>28706 this man is paying premium rate and doesn't even work near here, so what's the point?.

He gets a free, slightly moany, cleaner.
>> No. 28709 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 10:53 am
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>>28705
The graph is enough to display passive aggression, adding dates is just self indulgent .. besides, they might interpret it as a schedule you're willing to begrudingly keep.
>> No. 28710 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 10:54 am
28710 spacer
>>28707
You have my sympathies fellow tidy lad and good luck.

>>28708
You mock but I actually bought all my own things and keep them in my room.

When nobody else would wash up his mess to use the communal pots he too stopped washing up, confused as to why it wasn't happening, he started just eating microwave meals and takeaway Nandos.

It felt cruel but I enjoyed watching him continuously eat stuff he didn't want to eat all because he wouldn't rub a sponge around a pot a few times and rinse it out.
>> No. 28711 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 6:05 pm
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>>28710
>When nobody else would wash up his mess to use the communal pots he too stopped washing up, confused as to why it wasn't happening, he started just eating microwave meals and takeaway Nandos.

Washing up is so easy though. You just stand in the same place for fifteen minutes listening to the radio and then it's over. Hoovering can be a ballache, but washing up? Even I do it and I'm barely sentient.
>> No. 28712 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 7:26 pm
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I told my mum I liked rhubarb and custard sweets once and now I occasionally get given a bag of the boiled, red and yellow ones, rather than the squishy, pastel-coloured ones I was actually talking about.
>> No. 28713 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 7:37 pm
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>>28712

Well it's the thought that counts I guess.
>> No. 28714 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 7:40 pm
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>>28712
Your fault for not specifying rhubarb and custard chews.
>> No. 28715 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 7:50 pm
28715 spacer
When I wait for the bus in the morning there is a women who catches it from the same spot.
Thing is she comes from a block of flats down the road, crosses the road, walks down a bit then crosses back over to the bus stop.
I dunno if she is trying to pretend she doesn't live in them or something but it just fucking annoys me.
>> No. 28716 Anonymous
27th June 2019
Thursday 8:12 pm
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>>28713
I guess.

>>28714
I don't think I even knew there was another kind whenever it was I mentioned it. The worst thing about the boiled ones is that they're too big, they take up about a third of my gob space so I end up eating them.
>> No. 28717 Anonymous
6th July 2019
Saturday 12:06 am
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Lads is this possible? I was watching a few episodes of Top Gear on Netflix, on my TV, then later went onto my laptop and went to Youtube. All of a sudden I'm getting car related recommendations and the only reason I've noticed is because they literally never come up for me. But yeah just this creepy future shit in general pisses me off.
>> No. 28718 Anonymous
6th July 2019
Saturday 12:30 am
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>>28717
Just wait, they'll stop now you've mentioned disliking them here.
>> No. 28719 Anonymous
6th July 2019
Saturday 12:28 pm
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>>28717
Have you run a virus scan on your TV recently?
>> No. 28720 Anonymous
6th July 2019
Saturday 12:47 pm
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>>28719
He's going to have to reformat and reinstall the TV.
>> No. 28722 Anonymous
6th July 2019
Saturday 7:59 pm
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>>28719>>28720

Why are you berks talking as if TVs haven't been running OSes and being connected to the internet for the last fifteen years?
>> No. 28723 Anonymous
6th July 2019
Saturday 10:42 pm
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>>28722

I'm still using a SONY KE-P42XS1. I can't afford to give a fuck.
>> No. 28724 Anonymous
6th July 2019
Saturday 11:36 pm
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>>28722
Dunno what you mean.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-48664251
>> No. 28725 Anonymous
7th July 2019
Sunday 9:29 am
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I was on Greenwich Peninsula yesterday and I guess there was a Father Ted thing going on because there were so many people wearing identical t-shirts with "That's nice!" on the front and "Feck off!" on the back. You know that bit in Extras where all the people wearing t-shirts with the shitty slogans on turn up? Like that. Not even better quality.
There's a bridge there which doesn't go anywhere, they claim it's a park but it feels more like a museum with a small number of unimaginative exhibits of plants and trees in places they can't really grow; "Here's what we think nature might have looked like". Endless paving trod by families clutching bags of crap from the M&M World shop passing adverts for exclusive £550,000 one bedroom flats in the glass towers, plump young men in Oakleys and Marvel t-shirts, a crowd gathered to watch a group of dancers who appeared to be there to advertise for Nike.
Have you noticed how featureless so many of these new developments are? There'll be flat pavement intersecting with the building's wall at a sharp angle, no variation in either. It's as though the architects are trying to imitate early Counter Strike maps, as few polygons as possible to create something that vaguely resembles a human construction. The desert of the real.
>> No. 28727 Anonymous
7th July 2019
Sunday 2:24 pm
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It's Sunday, it's really hot, just let me sit around in my pants and watch Star Trek, stop making me garden.
>> No. 28728 Anonymous
8th July 2019
Monday 12:24 am
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I always get thirsty over exes about a year or so after it ended.

I don't know how to stop this. It doesn't matter if I'm single or with someone far better, I just crave fucking them the same way you crave a food you haven't had in ages.

I hate my brain, honestly.
>> No. 28729 Anonymous
8th July 2019
Monday 6:10 am
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>>28728

I suggest having bitter, ugly breakups (or, indeed, bitter ugly exes).
>> No. 28730 Anonymous
8th July 2019
Monday 11:58 am
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>>28729

Neither of those present a serious obstacle. I think it's just a forbidden fruit kind of thing.
>> No. 28731 Anonymous
10th July 2019
Wednesday 1:01 am
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Maybe I LIKE starchy rice.
>> No. 28732 Anonymous
10th July 2019
Wednesday 4:28 am
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>>28731

Just wash it you lazy cunt
>> No. 28733 Anonymous
10th July 2019
Wednesday 7:44 am
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I just cannot be fucked with work. I should quit.
>> No. 28734 Anonymous
10th July 2019
Wednesday 8:01 am
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>>28733
I'd say post about it in the workplace annoyances thread, but the mods locked it for literally no reason.
>> No. 28735 Anonymous
10th July 2019
Wednesday 9:00 am
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>>28734

Maybe start a work annoyances thread mk II?
>> No. 28736 Anonymous
10th July 2019
Wednesday 9:08 am
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>>28735

When that lad tried to start a dream thread mk II he got deleted and banned so there you go.
>> No. 28737 Anonymous
10th July 2019
Wednesday 9:12 am
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>>28735
There's no reason to start a new thread when there wasn't anything wrong with the old thread, especially on a board as slow as /job/.
>> No. 28738 Anonymous
17th July 2019
Wednesday 7:50 pm
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Watched a few episodes of The Thick of It on the iPlayer and now clips are getting recommended on YouTube, watched it on my TV and everything, totally seperate machine. Hate this shit, makes me feel like a schizophrenic.
>> No. 28739 Anonymous
17th July 2019
Wednesday 7:59 pm
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>>28737

It was literally fucking massive though.

>>28736

That was only because I'd already made on with Scarlett Moffat's face on it to stare at you all for the next ten years.
>> No. 28740 Anonymous
17th July 2019
Wednesday 8:03 pm
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>>28739

I don't understand your agenda against long threads. As a mod you should realise that the defining trait of britfa.gs is slow, cumbersome legacy. This is our mausoleum and you're trying to dust it - it ruins the character
>> No. 28741 Anonymous
17th July 2019
Wednesday 8:29 pm
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>>28739
>It was literally fucking massive though.

So what? It serves as a time capsule.
>> No. 28742 Anonymous
18th July 2019
Thursday 12:24 am
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>>28740

I'm not even a mod, just saying. Considering that a lot of us phone post now (I'd estimate a good 50-70% of .gs traffic is from the toilet), so long threads are more of a pain in the arse.

They do keep the old threads around, just locked, right?
>> No. 28743 Anonymous
18th July 2019
Thursday 12:27 am
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>>28742

If your argument is about how good GS is for mobile there is a world more concerning issues with this site then the volume of user content.
>> No. 28744 Anonymous
19th July 2019
Friday 5:41 pm
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For the last few days I've eaten spicy food almost exclusively. Enchiladas, spicy beef pizza with jalapeños on, and such like.

I'm regretting it today. It's caught up with me and I'm wracked with agonising gut cramps. I've had about four shits already and they're getting increasingly sloppy and hot on my ringpiece.

How do I make it stop jesus christ.
>> No. 28745 Anonymous
19th July 2019
Friday 6:02 pm
28745 spacer
>>28744
boof milk
>> No. 28746 Anonymous
20th July 2019
Saturday 11:12 am
28746 spacer
I realise this is going to make me sound like one of those MRA loons, but there's been a fair amount of coverage in the news about a man and woman getting beaten up in Manchester. The woman turned down someone's advances and was twatted in the face, which was followed by the twatter and his two mates beating seven shades of shit out of the man. The news coverage has overwhelmingly focused on what happened to the woman, even though the man was attacked far worse; I know violence against women isn't socially acceptable and the media like a story centred on an attractive woman but it's still pretty jarring he's been demoted to a mere footnote.
>> No. 28747 Anonymous
20th July 2019
Saturday 11:17 am
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>>28746
He failed to protect his woman. Nobody likes to celebrate or sympathise with failure.
>> No. 28748 Anonymous
20th July 2019
Saturday 12:00 pm
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>>28747
They were leaving the Gay Village, so I just assumed he was a bumder.
>> No. 28750 Anonymous
21st July 2019
Sunday 11:23 pm
28750 spacer

Untitled.png
287502875028750
There ought to be a law about doing bread in odd slices. Don't give me all that talk about soup, if I wanted dipping bread I'd use the crusts (which coincidentally are unusually skinny).

It's the cheek of it. Slicing the bread is automated so they've deliberately set out to give the good people of this nation odd slices while knowing full well that people overwhelmingly consume two bits of bread for sandwiches and toast. Is this how they do things in Lancashire?
>> No. 28751 Anonymous
21st July 2019
Sunday 11:54 pm
28751 spacer
>>28750

https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/bread-rolls-in-for-david-cameron-with-pound25000-from-warburtons-zrr5rdcj79g

It's another Tory divide and conquer tactic. They know the average Tory would never buy a mass-produced Chorleywood bread, it's only local artisan sourdough for them, so the only people buying their bread are the plebs. Get them angry about bread slice sizes, and they won't have time or energy to worry about the real issues.
>> No. 28752 Anonymous
22nd July 2019
Monday 2:13 am
28752 spacer
>>28750

Well there's obviously summat up wi 'em. Bloody Lancashire.
>> No. 28753 Anonymous
22nd July 2019
Monday 2:49 am
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>>28751
>Chorleywood
Are you thinking of Chorley? To be fair, they're both outside the M25, so most Londoners wouldn't know the difference. About 200 miles.
>> No. 28754 Anonymous
22nd July 2019
Monday 7:54 am
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>>28753

I'm not him but I don't know much about chorleywood bread except it's mean't to be not real bread somehow.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chorleywood_bread_process
>> No. 28755 Anonymous
22nd July 2019
Monday 7:56 am
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21539.photo.2.jpg
287552875528755
Yorkshire bread > Lancashire bread.
>> No. 28758 Anonymous
22nd July 2019
Monday 11:02 am
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>>28753
You fucked the job there, didn't you lad? Don't go around accusing folk of being ignorant Londoners unless you're absolutely sure of what you're on about.

>>28755
Jackson's is like crack. I had to stop buying it because otherwise I'd eat a whole loaf in a couple of days.
>> No. 28759 Anonymous
22nd July 2019
Monday 8:35 pm
28759 spacer
Mind you, calling a loaf of bread a "bloomer" is a /101/ on it's own.
>> No. 28760 Anonymous
22nd July 2019
Monday 9:14 pm
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>>28759
>on it's own
>> No. 28761 Anonymous
23rd July 2019
Tuesday 2:56 pm
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Why is everyone of my namesake such an utter fucking prick? I'm not being unfair here, I'm one of them, it's just remarkable how uniform the twattishness is. Perhaps "uniform" is the wrong word, because it takes different forms.
>> No. 28762 Anonymous
23rd July 2019
Tuesday 3:03 pm
28762 spacer
I don't know who did the redesign of Vice's homepage, but they should probably be kept under psychiatric observation for the rest of the week.
>> No. 28763 Anonymous
23rd July 2019
Tuesday 3:18 pm
28763 spacer
>>28762
Go on.
>> No. 28778 Anonymous
23rd July 2019
Tuesday 7:29 pm
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>>28763
It's just a scattershot mess, there's not much more to say.
>> No. 28779 Anonymous
23rd July 2019
Tuesday 8:14 pm
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>>28778
Given it looks like a fairly normal three column job, you might have to be a bit more specific.
>> No. 28780 Anonymous
23rd July 2019
Tuesday 8:28 pm
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>>28762
By modern standards of news sites, it really isn't that bad; in fact I think I quite like it.
>> No. 28824 Anonymous
25th July 2019
Thursday 2:25 pm
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"I will kill that man. I don't care how many arrows they feather me with, how many spears they run through me - I will kill that STOP BREXIT c*nt before I fall!"
>> No. 28825 Anonymous
25th July 2019
Thursday 2:42 pm
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>>28824
>c*nt

What? What is this? What even is this?
>> No. 28826 Anonymous
25th July 2019
Thursday 3:00 pm
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>>28825
We don't talk about filthy European currency here, m7.
>> No. 28831 Anonymous
25th July 2019
Thursday 4:19 pm
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>>28825
I just copy and pasted from a quote site. Too hot to proof read.
>> No. 28843 Anonymous
26th July 2019
Friday 4:05 pm
28843 spacer
Had a fucking shocker at work.

Ah well.
>> No. 28844 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 12:48 pm
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>>28843
Well then don't touch the light switch when your hands are wet.
>> No. 28846 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 3:50 pm
28846 spacer
>>28844
😬
>> No. 28847 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 4:45 pm
28847 spacer

Screenshot_20190727-164049.png
288472884728847
Unforecast rain. It's being going at umbrella strength for a good few minutes now.
>> No. 28848 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 5:17 pm
28848 spacer
>>28847
I told you mate and people will have you believe they can forecast the weather thirty years from now.
>> No. 28849 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 5:21 pm
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>>28848
Well shit, you could have told me before I booked the garden party for my 60th.
>> No. 28850 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 5:21 pm
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>>28848
Long term trends are completely different to week-on-week events. You can safely assume when the world population will hit eight billion, but that doesn't mean you know how many babies will be born at York Hospital this coming Wednesday. Stop being silly.
>> No. 28851 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 5:54 pm
28851 spacer
>>28850
What do you mean you can estimate how many times out of a hundred any given number on a dice will show up when rolled but you can't tell me which number's going to come up next?!
>> No. 28852 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 5:59 pm
28852 spacer
>>28851
I can tell you with around 17% confidence that it'll be a 4.
>> No. 28853 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 6:01 pm
28853 spacer
>>28852
That's a significantly lower accuracy than even a ten-day forecast.
>> No. 28854 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 6:10 pm
28854 spacer
>>28853
Roll it 20 times and that goes up to 97%.
>> No. 28855 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 6:54 pm
28855 spacer
>>28846

Can't believe I got away wih an emoji response.

(A good day to you Sir!)
>> No. 28856 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 7:18 pm
28856 spacer
>>28854
Roll it 20 times and there's still only a 17% chance it'll be a 4 next roll.
>> No. 28858 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 10:25 pm
28858 spacer
>>28856
Look mate, do you want a 4 or not?
>> No. 28859 Anonymous
27th July 2019
Saturday 10:49 pm
28859 spacer
>>28858
What is this, unambitious DND?
>> No. 28860 Anonymous
30th July 2019
Tuesday 6:26 am
28860 spacer
>>28641

I just learned this was a parody of a specific Slinky advert.


>> No. 28861 Anonymous
1st August 2019
Thursday 8:23 am
28861 spacer
I had a dream that took place within in a fictional home this morning, and I liked the design so much I immediately tried to sketch it out, but my drawing skills are so utterly pathetic that I could get more than one wall down before giving up. Looked like a ten year old had done it, a shit ten year old.
>> No. 28862 Anonymous
1st August 2019
Thursday 10:39 am
28862 spacer
>>28861

Try doing something simpler, like a floor plan. Or simply write out the details you remember in words to supplement where your sketching skills are lacking.

I'm sure there's plenty of architects or interior designers that aren't great draughtsmen.
>> No. 28867 Anonymous
2nd August 2019
Friday 4:44 pm
28867 spacer
>>28571
Yet another company in administration using it as an excuse to blatantly run off with customers' money.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-49200999

>The group said Super Break hotel-only holidays would be cancelled and people currently on holiday might have to pay again.

>Malvern Group said [...] tickets for entertainment and attractions were no longer valid.

Thankfully not affected myself, but this is becoming tiresome.
>> No. 28868 Anonymous
3rd August 2019
Saturday 11:27 am
28868 spacer
People who don't believe in brevity. I'll admit many of my posts on here are minor essays, but I'm talking IRL, face-to-face, humans who will, on repeate occasions, divulge every single detail of a story, or a thing they watced, or what have you. It's not even the case that I'm not interested in what they're saying, it's that I become uninterested over the fifteen minute long monologue I'm sitting through. However, they do get double bugger bonus points when they have to know it's something I never gave a monkeys about.
>> No. 28869 Anonymous
3rd August 2019
Saturday 12:41 pm
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People who don't believe in brevity.
>> No. 28870 Anonymous
3rd August 2019
Saturday 12:44 pm
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Gasbags.
>> No. 28871 Anonymous
3rd August 2019
Saturday 12:53 pm
28871 spacer
Gas.
>> No. 28872 Anonymous
4th August 2019
Sunday 12:19 am
28872 spacer
When you know on a rational level that it is time to take a shit before you go out but feel no urge to go. Then as soon as you leave the house you need to take a fat shit.

Have you ever read about how Octopuses come with a built-in toffee cannon that doubles as a propellant nozzle and ink gun? Meanwhile, despite evolving arses before mouths, our first colonists on Mars will be very unhappy indeed having nothing to wipe their arses with besides sand.

>>28868
I'm of the opposite annoyance. Contemporary language has been broken down in tandem with the rise modern communication platforms as we have come to take the very act of communication for granted. This leads us, in our vanity and fetish for the impersonal, to attempt to live as in a world of mechanical facts where chains of experience only serve as a hindrance.

As a result of this we can only understand others in terms of tropes, have little conception of what it means to be alive and face an utter incapacity to address modern identity politics in dialogue or public policy. Your painfully single woman at work is a classic scapegoat but is her prolixity due to conversational white noise or instead a failure of articulation coupled with deeper insecurities?
>> No. 28873 Anonymous
4th August 2019
Sunday 12:37 am
28873 spacer
>>28872
An inability to recommend a film without summarising the whole plot or listing the A roads you took to buy garden furniture just make someone a poor story teller, nothing more. I'm sorry you wasted your time studying philosphy or are currently working under Jacob Reese-Mogg.
>> No. 28874 Anonymous
4th August 2019
Sunday 4:31 am
28874 spacer
>>28873
I think he was just high.
>> No. 28875 Anonymous
4th August 2019
Sunday 2:07 pm
28875 spacer
This whole bullshit "cyclists vs drivers" war, wherein apparently it's OK to openly say you want to murder cyclists.

Yes, some cyclists are dickheads (and ones who run red lights, etc should be punished just the same as a driver), but so are some drivers. What we really need is a complete change of attitude.
>> No. 28876 Anonymous
4th August 2019
Sunday 11:26 pm
28876 spacer
Moving to Manchester for a job and on top of the fucking absolutely cunting EXTORTIONATE deposit for the place I'm going to rent, my car insurance is going to go up by a fucking grand, minimum. Fucking, brilliant. Where the fuck am I expected to pull £2k from as a recently graduated student? Now I know why people are still living with their parents at 40.
>> No. 28877 Anonymous
5th August 2019
Monday 9:12 am
28877 spacer
>>28876
Why didn't you think these things through before accepting the job?
>> No. 28878 Anonymous
5th August 2019
Monday 9:25 am
28878 spacer
>>28877
Because it's not like there are hundreds of jobs elsewhere. it's not like I won't be able to afford it once the money starts coming in but it's still a fucking pisstake.

For jobs in the field I want to go into, the only other place is London, and it's even worse there.
>> No. 28879 Anonymous
5th August 2019
Monday 10:37 am
28879 spacer
>>28876
Extortionate deposits are illegal now. They are capped at five weeks' rent. If you think that's a lot then you don't know how good you have it.
>> No. 28880 Anonymous
5th August 2019
Monday 4:57 pm
28880 spacer
>>28879
Five weeks rent, plus the first months rent too on move in day is still a lot when you only have 8-12 hours a week working over summer and the dregs of a student loan.

Still, haggled with my insurance company to get it to 'only' go up by £500, which I can just about, if begrudgingly, swallow. When I was living in Manchester city centre, they wanted over £2k a year, so thank fuck it's not that.
>> No. 28881 Anonymous
5th August 2019
Monday 6:15 pm
28881 spacer
>>28876

Lad I moved from a graduate job in Manchester to London actually and to be honest if you have to drive, by the time you've shelled out for cars etc as a young person day to day living costs aren't even that different.

That said if you're not from the north west get ready for the greyest, wettest existence you could ever imagine.

Car insurance is a rip off but even as a sensible driver lad, you can see why young lads get charged so much, nearly everytime I saw somebody do something recklessly irresponsible (not poor driving or a mistake but genuine not giving a fuck 'I know this might kill me and others' move) it has been other young lads.
>> No. 28882 Anonymous
6th August 2019
Tuesday 7:14 pm
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co op frusilli tricolour-2cg4__width_900__height_9.jpg
288822888228882
Co-op have discontinued their tricolore fusilli, the utter shits.
>> No. 28883 Anonymous
6th August 2019
Tuesday 7:39 pm
28883 spacer
>>28882
Seems a bit strange to care so much about crafting materials for primary school children.
>> No. 28884 Anonymous
6th August 2019
Tuesday 7:41 pm
28884 spacer
>>28882

Tesco do a tricolore fusilli.
>> No. 28885 Anonymous
6th August 2019
Tuesday 7:59 pm
28885 spacer
>>28884
Shopping at Tesco is truly harrowing, though.
>> No. 28886 Anonymous
7th August 2019
Wednesday 1:13 am
28886 spacer
>>28885
Not if you go late at night when nobody else is there.
>> No. 28887 Anonymous
7th August 2019
Wednesday 1:18 am
28887 spacer
>>28885

Is it? It isn't Morrisons or Iceland. But then you are one of those co-op people so that explains it.
>> No. 28888 Anonymous
7th August 2019
Wednesday 7:04 am
28888 spacer
I just woke up, in my dream I met the girl that was a 10/10 to me and it was perfect.

She isn't real.
>> No. 28889 Anonymous
7th August 2019
Wednesday 7:34 am
28889 spacer
>>28887
I only shop at Co-op because it is the nearest shop to me and they offer 10% student discount.

Asda and Tesco are negative sensory overloads. Tesco in particular seems designed to be as bleak as possible, to suck the life out of you.
>> No. 28890 Anonymous
8th August 2019
Thursday 12:17 am
28890 spacer
>>28889
I don't agree about Tesco's but I do feel the same way about Aldi. I also like the discount and membership at the local Co-op. Also the wine is cheap and good enough to drink.
>> No. 28891 Anonymous
9th August 2019
Friday 7:48 am
28891 spacer
Why the FUCK does my council seem intent on replacing every roundabout, big or small, with a fucking four way traffic light intersection? We're not fucking america, who in the fuck decided this is a good idea? It slows traffic down exponentially and presumably is much more expensive to build and maintain.

I get that it probably stops a couple of accidents a year but who cares.
>> No. 28892 Anonymous
9th August 2019
Friday 8:43 am
28892 spacer
>>28891
In the UK we call it a junction.
>> No. 28893 Anonymous
9th August 2019
Friday 9:59 am
28893 spacer
>>28891
Don't local councils exist more or less solely to funnel cash to their cronies?
>> No. 28894 Anonymous
9th August 2019
Friday 10:01 am
28894 spacer
>>28892
Crossroads m8
>> No. 28895 Anonymous
9th August 2019
Friday 12:21 pm
28895 spacer
>>28892

Yeah, I know, that's my point.
>> No. 28896 Anonymous
9th August 2019
Friday 12:23 pm
28896 spacer
This will inevitably sound racist, but the Asian lads at work seem to be covering themselves in deodorant at least once an hour.
>> No. 28897 Anonymous
9th August 2019
Friday 3:40 pm
28897 spacer
>>28896
You got some sort of problem with smelling with good, bro?
>> No. 28898 Anonymous
11th August 2019
Sunday 6:13 pm
28898 spacer
People who leave the door open a bit while they're pissing.
>> No. 28899 Anonymous
11th August 2019
Sunday 6:35 pm
28899 spacer
>>28898
Not on. Growing up, the door was always a signal. Door closed = occupied, door slightly open = vacant.
>> No. 28903 Anonymous
14th August 2019
Wednesday 10:15 am
28903 spacer
There's a forum I post on where the moderators are absolutely fucking autistic. They will lock threads as soon as two or three posts start to veer even slightly off topic, as though they don't know how discussion works or just basic human interaction.

One of them literally said this upon closing a 98 page long thread:

>I would also suggest those that have contributed to off topic discussion to take some time to consider their posts.

I've really got to wonder what kind of person can write a sentence like that, on an unimportant internet forum for hobbyists, without having a long hard stare in the mirror to wonder why they're such a massive spod with no friends.
>> No. 28904 Anonymous
14th August 2019
Wednesday 11:34 am
28904 spacer

stallman gno.png
289042890428904
Proprietary software. Microsoft's default photo viewer somehow started gobbling up all my memory if I leave an image open for too long, notepad is shit for editing guitar tabs, and Adobe PDF is slow and bloated. I ended up installing irfanview, notepad++, and sumatra pdf and my computer experience is now significantly better.

A while ago I had to use a bootable version of Linux Mint to recover all my files when Windows borked itself, and I would've stuck with it if I didn't need Windows for audio software and videogames. It just felt so pleasantly streamlined and intuitive.
>> No. 28905 Anonymous
14th August 2019
Wednesday 12:05 pm
28905 spacer
>>28903
Mods are almost universally a funny bunch. The self appointed postmasters are worse; whining about other posts without reporting them or declaring that certain subjects are off limits.
>> No. 28906 Anonymous
14th August 2019
Wednesday 12:32 pm
28906 spacer
>>28904
Can't you dual boot? That's what I'm doing with my new laptop that had Win 10 pre-installed, stuck Mint on a new partition. It's 2019, high time I started learning Linux.
>> No. 28907 Anonymous
14th August 2019
Wednesday 1:16 pm
28907 spacer
>>28906
Too much hassle. I don't want to switch operating systems every time I want to noodle around on my guitar while watching a youtube video.
>> No. 28908 Anonymous
14th August 2019
Wednesday 1:28 pm
28908 spacer
>>28904
I found WMP to constantly communicate over the internet dispite disabling all the options i could find. Installed Foobar2000 and haven't looked back. Takes a little effort to set up but once you're done, it's golden.
>> No. 28909 Anonymous
14th August 2019
Wednesday 2:23 pm
28909 spacer
>>28907

You can install Ubuntu within Windows using Windows Subsystem for Linux, or run Windows within a VM on a Linux system.
>> No. 28910 Anonymous
15th August 2019
Thursday 11:40 am
28910 spacer
Waiting all week for a heavy item delivery, I spot the Parcelforce van pull up for a moment then fuck off again. The busy lad left an "attempted delivery" card on the floor of my building's lobby. Didn't even bother using the intercom or posting the card through my door.

If some people got paid what they were worth, they'd starve.
>> No. 28911 Anonymous
15th August 2019
Thursday 4:28 pm
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missing.png
289112891128911
Fuck's sake.
>> No. 28914 Anonymous
15th August 2019
Thursday 10:57 pm
28914 spacer
>>28911

At least they had the good sense not to replace it with a different product, as anything else would have been insulting.
>> No. 28915 Anonymous
15th August 2019
Thursday 11:13 pm
28915 spacer
>>28914
Joke's on them. This afternoon I went to a competing store and picked up both milk and dark chocolate packs. If Brexit and Scottish independence result in tariffs on Tunnock's Caramel Wafers then I'll be putting my FPS skills to work.
>> No. 28916 Anonymous
16th August 2019
Friday 1:00 pm
28916 spacer
FUCKING ESTATE AGENT CUNTS.
>> No. 28917 Anonymous
16th August 2019
Friday 2:50 pm
28917 spacer
People who won't eat food past it's expiry date.
>> No. 28918 Anonymous
16th August 2019
Friday 2:55 pm
28918 spacer
People who incorrectly use "it's" as the genitive of "it".
>> No. 28919 Anonymous
16th August 2019
Friday 2:56 pm
28919 spacer
>>28915
>I'll be putting my FPS skills to work.

Uh-oh, sounds like someone's writing a manifesto.
>> No. 28920 Anonymous
16th August 2019
Friday 3:00 pm
28920 spacer
>>28918
Autocorrect, innit.
>> No. 28921 Anonymous
16th August 2019
Friday 5:46 pm
28921 spacer
>>28919
Tunnock's is a cause worth dying for, m7.
>> No. 28922 Anonymous
16th August 2019
Friday 10:03 pm
28922 spacer
I've started to catch myself avoiding saying words I can't spell, in physical conversations. It's a little embarrassing which is also one of those words.
>> No. 28923 Anonymous
16th August 2019
Friday 11:50 pm
28923 spacer
Dear people that are better than me at my job,

Please let me know when you're off the market so I don't keep getting rejected with "we found a better candidate".

That is all.
>> No. 28924 Anonymous
17th August 2019
Saturday 10:23 am
28924 spacer
>>28923

Keep your chin up lad. I've been rejected from some shocking jobs and I'm working in one now that's better than any of them, they couldn't get me if they wanted me now.

You'll get there.
>> No. 28925 Anonymous
17th August 2019
Saturday 9:31 pm
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I haven't shat for three days. Any longer and I'm taking this to /emo/.
>> No. 28926 Anonymous
17th August 2019
Saturday 9:37 pm
28926 spacer
>>28925

Eat more fibre, drink more water and take some senna.
>> No. 28927 Anonymous
17th August 2019
Saturday 9:39 pm
28927 spacer
I've had the Lincolnshire Poacher ident stuck in my head all day. At least it's not UVB-76.


>> No. 28928 Anonymous
17th August 2019
Saturday 10:57 pm
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no.png
289282892828928
I don't pay my bloody license fee for shite like this.
>> No. 28929 Anonymous
17th August 2019
Saturday 11:50 pm
28929 spacer
>>28928

You aren't, and you legally don't have to for it. You are paying your netflix subscription for it
>> No. 28930 Anonymous
22nd August 2019
Thursday 5:40 pm
28930 spacer
People are whining about the loan charge again. Tax dodging cunts complaining that they might lose their house or be forced into bankruptcy if they have to pay back all the tax they dodged.
>> No. 28931 Anonymous
22nd August 2019
Thursday 5:49 pm
28931 spacer
The one frame, or too few to read/see what it is, joke. Loads of YouTubers do it, but I see it most on Anthony Fantano's channels. It's just annoying, I have to pause the video and go back to check what it was, it's not like the editor is sneaking something past the network's big hats.
>> No. 28932 Anonymous
26th August 2019
Monday 11:43 am
28932 spacer
It's happening again. A few years ago I remember that whenever I'd pick a film to watch it'd end up being full of rape or child abuse, it got to the point where I just stopped bothering, but now the same thing is happening. It's like my own personal It curse. I know this might sound odd, or not maybe it's totally normal, but I have a very severe aversion to rape. I haven't been raped, I don't know anyone who's been raped and I've never even done a rape myself, but it just makes my fucking skin crawl thinking about it.

I think I appriciate why some people just watch big silly comic book nonsense now. Star Wars might be bland, but at no point did I worry about Rey being under the looming threat of a violent assault from a group of Stormtroopers.
>> No. 28933 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 7:54 am
28933 spacer
>The average parental contribution for homebuyers this year is £24,100, up by more than £6,000 compared to last year, according to Legal & General (L&G).

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-49477404

Always great to see when, despite having wealthy boomer parents, I won't get a single penny to help.

How am I ever meant to get going when people start off 24k ahead of me? It's taken me years of saving to even get close.
>> No. 28934 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 8:14 am
28934 spacer
>>28933
It's a survey of 1,600 parents; I'd take it with a pinch of salt.

If you look at the actual Legal & General 2019 Bank of Mum and Dad report then you'd see that around a third of it is a plug for equity release; Legal & General want to be a major player in this market.

This is purely a marketing exercise. Life companies come up with all kinds of studies, often ones they can revisit each year, so they can get their name out there. They tend to have a calendar of marketing events, such as releasing a press release about student loans or the cost of university around the time of results day. These are then regurgitated uncritically by the media; for example, the majority of personal finance articles in The Guardian are press releases they've picked up and then padded out with a few rent-a-quotes.
>> No. 28935 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 10:25 am
28935 spacer
Email, reply, email, reply, email, SILENCE!
>> No. 28936 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 10:40 am
28936 spacer
>>28935
You lost. Better luck next time.
>> No. 28937 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 11:43 am
28937 spacer
>>28936
What?
>> No. 28938 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 12:38 pm
28938 spacer
>>28937
By not responding, the other party either has a credible excuse for just disregarding whatever you were saying, or signalling that whatever it is isn't up for debate.
>> No. 28939 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 12:43 pm
28939 spacer
>>28938
It was just arranging a phonecall and they got back to me about ten minutes prior to your first response, but hey, better luck next time.
>> No. 28940 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 12:54 pm
28940 AIBU
My job is the most tolerable job I've ever had. By that, I mean that there's never going to be a job I 100% love waking up and going to every day, but this is the closest I've ever been.

If not for the one fucking miserable sad bint who makes it her business to go around maliciously gossiping about every cunt any chance she gets. Her and her handful of little cronies make me loathe every moment. You can hear them gossiping in that bullshit hushed tone, about how so and so doesn't pull their weight, and how so and so shouldn't be allowed to come in at different hours, and how so and so is taking the piss... Why don't people like this just get a fucking life instead of occupying themselves so much with everyone else's?

I would be able to dismiss it more easily is she wasn't a blatant hypocrite who does everything as slowly as possible to LOOK busy, and comes in early on a morning (when there's no work yet anyway) so she can fuck off an hour early and leave everyone else to pick up the slack.

I'm on the verge of anonymously making some sort of accusation of racism or something to get her sacked- She's been in trouble for something similar before apparently. She's harmless ultimately because none of the managers even give her bullshit the time of day, but even so. I could do without the atmosphere.
>> No. 28941 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 12:57 pm
28941 spacer
>>28939
I'm not the one who cried SILENCE, m7.

Though it does mean that around five minutes after complaining about the SILENCE it was resolved. I wonder if that works as a general technique. Let's try:

My salary is around 20% below market rate.
>> No. 28942 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 1:00 pm
28942 spacer
>>28940
>If not for the one fucking miserable sad bint [...]
Oh, you've got one of those toxic cunts. YANBU.
>> No. 28943 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 1:14 pm
28943 spacer
>>28941
The post was made an hour after the previous reply. This thread is labled "Minor Rants and Piss-Offs" for a reason.
>> No. 28944 Anonymous
27th August 2019
Tuesday 1:22 pm
28944 spacer
After meticulously researching market salaries, and pitching a number squarely in the 50-75% range, I've had some cheapskate ask me if I'd "reconsider my expectations". I guess that goes some way to explaining what my contact meant when they said the company was "desperate" for new hires.
>> No. 28945 Anonymous
28th August 2019
Wednesday 4:53 pm
28945 spacer
I really enjoy a Matcha Latte every now and then.

London has broken me.
>> No. 28946 Anonymous
28th August 2019
Wednesday 7:12 pm
28946 spacer
I got a £5 off card for Screwfix today. The problem is, the offer expired on the 26th. What fucking genius do I have to curse for this?
>> No. 28947 Anonymous
28th August 2019
Wednesday 9:56 pm
28947 spacer
>>28946
Mr Screwfix.
>> No. 28948 Anonymous
28th August 2019
Wednesday 10:22 pm
28948 spacer
>>28947
Mr Screwfix, bring me a card
(bung, bung, bung, bung)
Make it plastic, bendy and hard
(bung, bung, bung, bung)
Give it a sum, such as a fiver
(bung, bung, bung, bung)
I can put towards a new screwdriver
>> No. 28949 Anonymous
28th August 2019
Wednesday 10:24 pm
28949 spacer
I am sorry.
>> No. 28950 Anonymous
29th August 2019
Thursday 8:28 am
28950 spacer
>>28948

You are Joe Cornish and I claim my £5 gift card.
>> No. 28951 Anonymous
29th August 2019
Thursday 10:52 am
28951 spacer
>>28950

Cornballs is too busy making films and not putting Adam in them to be posting here.
>> No. 28952 Anonymous
29th August 2019
Thursday 11:17 am
28952 spacer
Plusnet just... Forgot to send me my router and also I have no hot water. Great.
>> No. 28953 Anonymous
29th August 2019
Thursday 4:02 pm
28953 spacer
>>28952
I've got no hot water either. I twisted the pressure thing, but it just sprayed water at me and then I saw a house spider so I washed myself with a flannel instead.
>> No. 28954 Anonymous
29th August 2019
Thursday 4:23 pm
28954 spacer
>>28953
The pressure regulator valve on the tank is fucked (I'm the samelad from the /uhu/ thread). When the plumber came to look at it it went from very low to no hot water at all. I've just had a bath by boiling the kettle 6 times and tipping it into the cold.

Plusnet sent the router in the post, saying it was small enough to fit through a letterbox. That's either a lie or royal mail couldn't be fucked because I just found a missed delivery slip. Fucking hell.
>> No. 28955 Anonymous
29th August 2019
Thursday 11:00 pm
28955 spacer
The music video threads.

I'm convinced it's one or two lads pretending to be about 7 different people.

I never click them and I don't want to listen to what some randomer posts here.
>> No. 28956 Anonymous
30th August 2019
Friday 12:40 am
28956 spacer
>>28955
The 'hide' button exists for a reason, lad.
>> No. 28957 Anonymous
30th August 2019
Friday 10:05 am
28957 spacer
>>28954
OH FUCKING GREAT. "WE'LL NEED TO SEND OUT AN ENGINEER TO PATCH THE FIBRE INTO YOUR LINE. THAT CAN ONLY BE DONE WHEN YOUR PHONE SERVICE GOES LIVE." IT's BEEN FUCKING LIVE FOR 3 DAYS SO WHY THE FUCK HAVEN'T YOU DONE IT YET? CUNTS. FUCK. ANOTHER WEEK OF TETHERING.
>> No. 28958 Anonymous
30th August 2019
Friday 11:06 am
28958 spacer
>>28955

I don't listen to them either. I don't like music the first time I hear it, only after I've heard it a few times so lately I've only been listening to mixtapes from DJs I trust. I don't even bother with albums anymore.

Pretending to be different people how though? Is posting a bunch of videos pretending to be different people? I thought you could only pretend to be different people by having a conversation with yourself.
>> No. 28959 Anonymous
30th August 2019
Friday 11:33 am
28959 spacer
>>28958

You can pretend to be different people while sitting still doing absolutely nothing obvious if you really want.
>> No. 28960 Anonymous
30th August 2019
Friday 12:07 pm
28960 spacer
>>28958
>I don't listen to them either

Me neither, for the most part. I have discovered new musicians here in the past but nothing in years.

Would purps be able to say how many times each YouTube embed on /beat/ is listened to? I'd imagine for many, particularly in the ones that aren't genre specific, it's zero.
>> No. 28961 Anonymous
30th August 2019
Friday 1:11 pm
28961 spacer
>>28960

I suppose at least it's gratifying if your thread takes off. Most threads starting with "please post [such a genre]" get tumbleweeds.
>> No. 28962 Anonymous
30th August 2019
Friday 3:24 pm
28962 spacer
>>28960
I go through and listen to a few every now and then. I rarely find anything I like, but appreciate a change of scene anyway.
>> No. 28963 Anonymous
30th August 2019
Friday 10:47 pm
28963 spacer
The term 'foodie' and particularly how it is applied to people who cook or make an effort to eat proper meals. It shouldn't be a valid description that you perform a basic part of looking after yourself or take pride in cooking something nice.

There is a bigger problem I think this highlights that seems acute in the city. Lads my age (late 20s - early 30s) are better for it these days while on more than one occasion I've taught a lass how a cheap packet of noodles can serve as the base for a decent meal or that cupcakes for dinner is unacceptable no matter if you're "being naughty". I know it's cliché at this point but it only seems to be getting worse as 'typical students' become dysfunctional adults.

>>28962
I echo this. Despite living in a time where finding new music should be easy, it is almost impossible to find something out of your comfort zone without music recommendation threads.

We do seem to have a problem with common courtesy i.e. avoid consecutive posts and try to comment on other peoples stuff. That's life though.
>> No. 28964 Anonymous
30th August 2019
Friday 11:08 pm
28964 spacer
>>28963
Perhaps anyone posting in the "What you feeling right now?" threads should add a little comment to qualify their selection and why it is captivating them.

Otherwise it'd be like if the weekend threads were an unlinked stream of consciousness where nobody attempts to have a conversation.

>I'm having Cornflakes for breakfast.
>My feet are cold.
>I better re-hang the curtains.
>The woman across the street is shouting at her kids again.
>That's not my regular postman.

It'd just look bonkers.
>> No. 28965 Anonymous
31st August 2019
Saturday 8:04 am
28965 spacer
>>28963

Why are consecutive posts discourteous? if someone asked you to post such-a-thing and you're trying to put them onto something they might like? The poster doesn't really get anything out of doing that.
>> No. 28966 Anonymous
31st August 2019
Saturday 8:08 am
28966 spacer
That's when a like/dislike button would come in useful. You're hardly going to feel moved to make a post just to say

>Yeah, that's a good one.

in a music thread.
>> No. 28967 Anonymous
31st August 2019
Saturday 8:10 am
28967 spacer
>>28964

I'd be more inclined to play a video which had a little description but I don't know why most songs captivate me. I just like them because I like them.
>> No. 28968 Anonymous
31st August 2019
Saturday 12:24 pm
28968 spacer

Louiszade.jpg
289682896828968
Please stop telling me how miserable you feel, because I feel it too and I'm trying not to care. Don't burden me with your hopelessness, because I feel it too and I'm trying not to mind. Enough with the melancholia, because I feel it too and I'm trying my best.

I'm utterly fed up with being brought down by people. I'm on the edge of completely packing it in almost constantly so I don't need to hear anyone elses irrational shit, I've more than enough of my own to bear. It's not even important crap and it's definitely not stuff these people want to work through. It's making me think of the "crab-pot" mentally one of you pair mentioned recently, only it's presumably unintentional. I've been very critical of mental health professionals before now, but I've got to give them some serious respect for not just throwing their notes in a patient's face and telling them to do one.
>> No. 28969 Anonymous
31st August 2019
Saturday 12:40 pm
28969 spacer
>>28968

Are you me and also are you talking to my girlfriend?

Her sadgirl:exciting ratio is all off.
>> No. 28970 Anonymous
31st August 2019
Saturday 2:54 pm
28970 spacer
>>28968

Crab pot might very well be me I bring it up a lot. It sounds like your needs are being neglected, if you want to start an emo thread maybe we can find some practical solutions for your problems if you explain them through. You obviously prefer that to self indulgence and I think that is good. That is how you get better, but a lot of these issues require lateral thinking.

For example my mental health has improved massively since I tricked a bunch of old friends into hanging out more regularly rather than the usual bullshit of never making time for each other. By getting them involved in a regular activity (playing an on going campaign) I get what I need socially and in self actualisation of my will, even though when I was having mood swings and panic attacks that didn't look like it was the answer.
>> No. 28971 Anonymous
31st August 2019
Saturday 3:19 pm
28971 spacer
>>28970
With all respect I've made so many /emo/ threads over the years that I'm only retreading old ground at this point. I don't have emotional problems, I have practical problems that lead to emotional problems.

>>28969
I'm not sure, but I'll check with my GP first thing Monday. No doubt he'll recommend CBT whatever the outcome.
>> No. 28972 Anonymous
1st September 2019
Sunday 4:02 pm
28972 spacer
>>28971

>With all respect I've made so many /emo/ threads over the years that I'm only retreading old ground at this point. I don't have emotional problems, I have practical problems that lead to emotional problems.

No offense taken lad. Sounds like you are on the right path, best of luck to you.
>> No. 28973 Anonymous
2nd September 2019
Monday 9:21 pm
28973 spacer
Pegging, turd-slipping, dildo-same-size-as-cock-ing lad; Can you cool it a bit?
>> No. 28974 Anonymous
2nd September 2019
Monday 10:54 pm
28974 spacer
I haven't had acne on my face since I was a teenlad. Now, the week I start a new job, my face looks like a freshly-baked pizza.

FUCK.
>> No. 28975 Anonymous
3rd September 2019
Tuesday 3:10 am
28975 spacer
>>28973

Pegging lad and dildo lad are two different lads.
>> No. 28976 Anonymous
3rd September 2019
Tuesday 10:05 am
28976 spacer
>>28973

Of all the things we post about on here, my toilet ramblings were too much for you?

I thought us fa.gs were made of sterner stuff.
>> No. 28977 Anonymous
3rd September 2019
Tuesday 11:31 am
28977 spacer
The man fixing the door said he'd be back tomorrow, but I never got a specific time. Whole day's a write-off.
>> No. 28978 Anonymous
3rd September 2019
Tuesday 1:42 pm
28978 spacer
>>28977

Phone him and ask him.
>> No. 28979 Anonymous
3rd September 2019
Tuesday 1:53 pm
28979 spacer
>>28978
I don't have a phone.
>> No. 28980 Anonymous
12th September 2019
Thursday 1:08 pm
28980 spacer
What's with lamps all having their switch a foot or two along the cable? It wasn't always this way. Did designers decide it was embarrassing to have a switch on the lamp itself? All very odd and I'm not a fan.
>> No. 28981 Anonymous
12th September 2019
Thursday 2:48 pm
28981 spacer
>>28980

>Did designers decide it was embarrassing to have a switch on the lamp itself? All very odd and I'm not a fan.

Probably this, plus it's cheaper to whack an inline switch in, I imagine.

I haven't seen or had a lamp with a lampshade in years, though, maybe that's more to do with it.
>> No. 28983 Anonymous
12th September 2019
Thursday 7:00 pm
28983 spacer
>>28981
Finding nice mains-rated switches and somewhere to mount them is a chore, and I design big ugly industrial stuff. I can absolutely see why you'd not bother given a choice. Buy in a lead with a globally compliant switch and move on. If the customer wants the switch near the plug, or wants to stick some zigbee-controlled remote switch, then let them. Replace the switch when it fails, as it's bound to.

Fuck big switch.
>> No. 28984 Anonymous
12th September 2019
Thursday 7:04 pm
28984 spacer
>>28983

Big Switch is my username on fetlife.
>> No. 28987 Anonymous
13th September 2019
Friday 2:45 pm
28987 spacer
Going to fancy coffee shops because it's fancy.
Fancy-shmancy.
Their coffee wasn't even half-decent.
Thank fucking god I wasn't the one who paid for it.
>> No. 28988 Anonymous
13th September 2019
Friday 3:31 pm
28988 spacer
I think there's something wrong with my prostate. God, I bet it's cancer, that's just absolutely the level of shit I've come to expect.
>> No. 28989 Anonymous
13th September 2019
Friday 4:12 pm
28989 spacer
>>28988
good luck bro
>> No. 28990 Anonymous
13th September 2019
Friday 8:47 pm
28990 spacer
>>28976
I didn't mean to be rude, was just feeling a little vulnerable. I hope i haven't stifled your expression.
>> No. 28991 Anonymous
18th September 2019
Wednesday 12:22 pm
28991 spacer
>>28571
The bus I'm on was just held up at a stop for 10 minutes because two mums were arguing over which one of them was going to fold up their pram to free up the wheelchair space.
>> No. 28992 Anonymous
18th September 2019
Wednesday 3:10 pm
28992 spacer
I was at this event and some woman walks past asking where the toilets are. I said where they were but she acted like she didn't hear me and opened the wrong door. So I said a bit more loudly "excuse me miss, they're-" and she interrupts with an angry "Yes I heard you". Bitch if you heard me then why are you going the wrong way? This is your fault.
>> No. 28993 Anonymous
18th September 2019
Wednesday 5:16 pm
28993 spacer
Through study of the Italian language football and strategy games I've become so accustomed to saying "Napoli" that whenever someone refers to "Naples" there's a moment in which I think "that's so familar why can't I place it...", before realising my error.
>> No. 28994 Anonymous
19th September 2019
Thursday 2:47 am
28994 spacer
I've got that little scratch at the back of my throat that says I've got a cold coming on. Summer is over, another year is drawing to an end, we all march inexorably towards the grave and, worst of all, I'm getting a cold.
>> No. 28997 Anonymous
19th September 2019
Thursday 6:47 pm
28997 spacer
Half pissed off, half scared NHSlad here.

How the fuck can a SHO not have even attempted to enrol on any training since their induction a year ago? How do I even tell a doctor "oh you shouldn't even be working because you've done fuck-all training with our trust in 11 months"?

This doctor also sounds thick as pigshit and probably doesn't even know how to use a computer. Still, it's not as scary as the surgeon who got struck off for shaving people in the wrong places.
>> No. 28998 Anonymous
19th September 2019
Thursday 6:52 pm
28998 spacer
>>28997

Ex-NHSlad here, I feel your pain. I have to hear these anecdotes if there's anything more to them.
>> No. 28999 Anonymous
19th September 2019
Thursday 7:46 pm
28999 spacer
>>28997

If it makes you feel any better, today I had to talk a pilot through why he couldn't just ignore the aircraft balance changes we'd informed him of, and that he would likely have crashed into a building on takeoff had he not accounted for it. He also wanted me to call his company engineer, and I'm pretty sure it was because he wasn't sure how to make the changes he needed to make.

yes, Ryanair, how did you know?
>> No. 29000 Anonymous
19th September 2019
Thursday 11:18 pm
29000 spacer
>>28997
>Still, it's not as scary as the surgeon who got struck off for shaving people in the wrong places.
Like their crotch, or just the wrong place on their back or whatever?
>> No. 29005 Anonymous
20th September 2019
Friday 3:20 pm
29005 spacer
>>29000
At Woodstock.
>> No. 29006 Anonymous
21st September 2019
Saturday 12:37 pm
29006 spacer
>>28997
Another exNHS lad here

He won't have enrolled on training because of arrogance.
My advice, get someone else to tell him he's not entitled to work as he will no doubt put in a spurious complaint against whoever does in a petty point scoring exercise
>> No. 29007 Anonymous
25th September 2019
Wednesday 7:12 pm
29007 spacer
Two things.

1. Lidl have changed the cheeses they use within their four cheese pizzas.

2. Someone at work keeps sending emails out about things like how we should all send birthday cards to that kid who was in the news because his skin keeps falling off and I still can't complain about it in the workplace annoyances thread .
>> No. 29008 Anonymous
26th September 2019
Thursday 11:46 am
29008 spacer
>>29007
Make another one.
>> No. 29009 Anonymous
26th September 2019
Thursday 1:40 pm
29009 spacer
>>29008
No. It's the principle of it.
>> No. 29010 Anonymous
26th September 2019
Thursday 1:40 pm
29010 spacer
Made you look.
>> No. 29011 Anonymous
26th September 2019
Thursday 1:42 pm
29011 spacer
>>29009
Stop being soft.
>> No. 29012 Anonymous
26th September 2019
Thursday 1:48 pm
29012 spacer
>>29011
Fluff him then
>> No. 29013 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 1:14 am
29013 spacer
>89 days until Christmas!

I think Christmas started 100 days early this year going by when I first saw Christmas themed biscuit packaging. At least the mince pies are in shops now.
>> No. 29014 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 12:45 pm
29014 spacer
>>29013
My local Card Factory had their Christmas card display set out in August. At this rate it'll be a straight race between the planet getting fucked and Christmas cards in January, and I genuinely don't know which of the two to back.

Also, I find it hilarious when the mince pies start turning up with Best Before dates in October.
>> No. 29015 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 5:45 pm
29015 spacer
Piss-taking collection times at postboxes. One box near my old office has a last collection time of 9am weekdays and 8am Saturdays.
>> No. 29016 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 8:21 pm
29016 spacer
The new Amazon add to basket sidebar thing is slow as fuck and only seems to work one in every ten times I try to add something, not to mention when it does work, it gives me an unwanted lists of sponsored products. I'm already buying shit, I've already seen these products.

Sort it out, amazonlad.
>> No. 29017 Anonymous
27th September 2019
Friday 9:30 pm
29017 spacer
>>29015

They just changed my nearest one from 5.30pm to 9am. I don't know why.
>> No. 29024 Anonymous
1st October 2019
Tuesday 6:20 pm
29024 spacer
People getting on for twenty stone telling me to be careful of how much fruit I'm eating because of "all the sugar".
>> No. 29025 Anonymous
2nd October 2019
Wednesday 9:53 pm
29025 spacer
Why the fuck do kids these days wear earphones by hanging them over their ears?
Why can't they just wear them properly? Fucking wankers.
>> No. 29026 Anonymous
3rd October 2019
Thursday 11:57 am
29026 spacer
>>29025
So they can hear the music or not get them tangled while still having directional hearing.
>> No. 29027 Anonymous
3rd October 2019
Thursday 6:35 pm
29027 spacer
"Lucy is 27 and works in marketing. Her hobbies are playing tennis, travelling and watching comedy shows."

I'm reading the sodding guardian and it feels like I'm on pissing Tinder. Have we fallen down some terrible reality tunnel where everyone's utterly boring because they're totally broke, or have we managed to breed a generation of cunts who are more boring than their own grandparents?
>> No. 29028 Anonymous
3rd October 2019
Thursday 7:43 pm
29028 spacer
>>29027
The dating bit or the actual Guardian newspaper?
>> No. 29029 Anonymous
3rd October 2019
Thursday 7:57 pm
29029 spacer
>>29028
He's quoting a BBC article.
>> No. 29030 Anonymous
3rd October 2019
Thursday 8:03 pm
29030 spacer
>>29029
But he said he was reading The (sodding) Guardian.
>> No. 29031 Anonymous
3rd October 2019
Thursday 8:05 pm
29031 spacer
>>29030
Strange I know.
>> No. 29032 Anonymous
3rd October 2019
Thursday 8:06 pm
29032 spacer
>>29029

You're right, no idea why I thought I was still on the guardian site.
>> No. 29033 Anonymous
3rd October 2019
Thursday 8:09 pm
29033 spacer
I'm very confused.
>> No. 29034 Anonymous
3rd October 2019
Thursday 8:18 pm
29034 spacer
>>29033

No mate, very is a catalogue for poor people and confused is an insurance price comparison website. It's very simple stuff.
>> No. 29036 Anonymous
7th October 2019
Monday 12:59 am
29036 spacer
It's that most wonderful time of the year where every YouTuber thinks they're uniquely being picked on and demonetised.
>> No. 29037 Anonymous
8th October 2019
Tuesday 1:45 pm
29037 spacer
Dear Amazon,

I do not want to share my purchase on social media, especially because my purchase was a massive bum dildo.

Kind regards,
A Sexual Deviant
>> No. 29038 Anonymous
8th October 2019
Tuesday 1:49 pm
29038 spacer
>>29037

What if they had a fetlife share option?
>> No. 29039 Anonymous
8th October 2019
Tuesday 1:57 pm
29039 spacer
>>29037
How does a bum dildo differ from a fanny dildo? Assuming a bum dildo differs from a plug.
>> No. 29040 Anonymous
8th October 2019
Tuesday 7:01 pm
29040 spacer

flanged-base.jpg
290402904029040
>>29039

Flanged base. You don't want to lose it up there.
>> No. 29041 Anonymous
8th October 2019
Tuesday 7:43 pm
29041 spacer
I work with someone who keeps boasting how she's leaving for a job paying more money; around £1,300 which equates to an increase of 3.8%. What she's omitted to tell most people is that she's actually going to be working an extra 5 hours per week so her hourly rate of pay will be going down, especially considering she would have been able to do 5 hours of overtime at time and a half here. There's also the fact that her commute will be much longer.

Do people often make such fundamental mistakes when leaving for a 'better paying' job?
>> No. 29042 Anonymous
8th October 2019
Tuesday 7:54 pm
29042 spacer
>>29041

She sounds like an idiot.
>> No. 29043 Anonymous
8th October 2019
Tuesday 10:36 pm
29043 spacer
>>29041
This is one of the reasons I get cagey about telling recruiters my salary. Made that mistake, and when explaining my expectation of a bump of around £6k said she'd already pitched me at £3k, at which point I had to explain that going from working across the road from my flat to an hour away by train was going to cost me almost that much.

Joke's on them. Local train company started playing silly buggers about a month in and so the job came to an end, and now I've landed a job much closer to home for a further £5k bump. In the last 24 months, with two failed moves, I'm now on 50% more than I was. If you're below market, it may take a couple of jumps to fix that, especially if the market is moving.
>> No. 29044 Anonymous
8th October 2019
Tuesday 11:34 pm
29044 spacer
>>29041

Half the population do not have the mathematical ability to calculate a simple percentage. In all likelihood, she couldn't work out the difference in hourly rate even if she wanted to. An awful lot of things are explained by the fact that most people are barely numerate.
>> No. 29046 Anonymous
9th October 2019
Wednesday 10:13 am
29046 spacer
>>29044

>Half the population do not have the mathematical ability to calculate a simple percentage

A whole 43%?! Seems unlikely.
>> No. 29047 Anonymous
9th October 2019
Wednesday 1:05 pm
29047 spacer
When I'm Supreme Chairman for Life anyone who drives a van for a living will be beaten in the streets by my teenaged Revolutionary Guards, along with anyone who fills a website with unnecessary bloat and/or clutter.
>> No. 29048 Anonymous
9th October 2019
Wednesday 1:52 pm
29048 spacer
>>29047
What's your problem with men with ven, edgymiddleclasslad?
>> No. 29049 Anonymous
9th October 2019
Wednesday 2:26 pm
29049 spacer
>>29048
Always driving on aggro mode, giving people shit for no reason, probably not paying taxes.

>middleclasslad

Go fuck yourself.
>> No. 29050 Anonymous
9th October 2019
Wednesday 5:47 pm
29050 spacer
>>29047

Don't knock it until you've tried it, lad. I used to think van drivers were cunts too, until I rented one for my last flat move. The sheer power. The rush of being taller than everyone else. The wild abandon with which you can endanger cyclist's lives.

It is intoxicating. I could feel myself being consumed by the van, and I only had it for a weekend. Imagine what driving one all day does to a man.
>> No. 29051 Anonymous
9th October 2019
Wednesday 6:07 pm
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>>29050

I find that having two large, wide angle wing mirrors in place of a central rear view leads to a certain driving style - you're far more confident about what's to each side of you, but not so much about what's potentially directly behind you, so you do end up swinging across lanes with abandon and utilising the inevitable turbo boost kick every time you do, just in case there's some motorbike about to smash your back doors in, so to speak.

The power factor is there for sure, too. It's no wonder those school run mums in their huge fuck off Range Rovers cause so much hassle.

I also used to drive a defender, and everyone else on the road seems terrified of you - I've almost never been cut off while driving what's essentially a three tonne steel tractor with bull bars, and you find yourself fantasising about just plowing into anyone daft enough to try, or slamming your brakes on when someone's up your arse. It wouldn't even leave a scratch on your motor, most likely, and they'd be mush.
>> No. 29052 Anonymous
10th October 2019
Thursday 9:40 am
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That bit on the Nine o'Clock News when they make the news reader check Twitter and then, even more perplexingly, the BBC website itself is really tragic.
>> No. 29053 Anonymous
10th October 2019
Thursday 12:41 pm
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>>29049
>Sweeping negative generalisations about a firmly working class profession

Lad.
>> No. 29054 Anonymous
10th October 2019
Thursday 1:31 pm
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>>29053
>Sweeping negative generalisations about a firmly cunt-dominated profession

FTFY
>> No. 29055 Anonymous
11th October 2019
Friday 10:10 pm
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Birmingham city centre is one big fucking building site.
>> No. 29056 Anonymous
12th October 2019
Saturday 11:16 am
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>>29055

It is a giant maze - another tourist attraction for the hoards of peaky blinders fans that will soon be taking open-top bus rides along the aston expressway.
>> No. 29057 Anonymous
12th October 2019
Saturday 12:04 pm
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>>29055
And no one seems to know what's being built or who it's being built for.
>> No. 29058 Anonymous
12th October 2019
Saturday 12:19 pm
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>>29055

I unfortunately had to live in Birmingham for a while. It just feels like a giant mess. There's no real discernible centre, just streets on top of streets of nothingness and declining high street chains really.

The shopping centre is alright, but even that had an off feeling about it.

Probably the most depressing place I've ever lived.
>> No. 29059 Anonymous
12th October 2019
Saturday 12:49 pm
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>>29056
No need for future tense.
>> No. 29060 Anonymous
12th October 2019
Saturday 2:14 pm
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The fact it costs me more to get the train to the airport than it does for some of the flights I catch.
>> No. 29061 Anonymous
12th October 2019
Saturday 2:45 pm
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>>29044
>Half the population do not have the mathematical ability to calculate a simple percentage.

I can attest to this after a visit to Iceland. Vegetable fingers are £1 each or two for £1.50. They scanned in three when I'd only got two and it took far, far too much explaining why I should be refunded £1 rather than 75p.

I've also got some of their vegan sausage rolls, so I'll see if they're as good as otherlad says.
>> No. 29062 Anonymous
12th October 2019
Saturday 3:07 pm
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>>29058

Nit a brummie myself but I've heard the bit with all the grungy little alternative music venues is slated for demolition, to build some shit modern cathedral of consumerism no doubt. The same kind of tragedy is happening in cities all over the country. There's going to be no such thing as genuine culture left in another ten years, just copy pastes of the same shopping centres, Wetherspoon pubs and middle of the road nightclubs in every single city. Sheffield, Leeds, Manchester, Birmingham, they all feel exactly the same.
>> No. 29063 Anonymous
12th October 2019
Saturday 3:34 pm
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>>29060
Are you booking the train ticket in advance the same way you are the flight?
>> No. 29064 Anonymous
12th October 2019
Saturday 4:24 pm
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I'm certain other languages do this already, but I wish English would incorporate a way of distinguishing between the hard and soft "j".
>> No. 29065 Anonymous
13th October 2019
Sunday 11:46 am
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When someone posts a rather appetizing beans on toast pic, but I can't be bothered to pop to the shops to buy the beans and the toastbread because it's a bit rainy out there.
>> No. 29066 Anonymous
13th October 2019
Sunday 1:22 pm
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>>29065
I feel your pain lad.
>> No. 29069 Anonymous
15th October 2019
Tuesday 1:29 am
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ARE RICO (bless him) tried to make joking reference to a bromance between him in Singapore and Lewis Vaughan-Jones in London, saying they "go together like Moss and Bros". Needless to say, it went down like flight 9525.
>> No. 29070 Anonymous
16th October 2019
Wednesday 9:10 pm
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Accidentally hoovered up a pair of shoe laces earlier.
>> No. 29071 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 11:13 am
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"Toxic".

Not because "ugh, me no like words that are different", but because it's being used wrong. You've got MPs talking about death threats being "toxic", which implies there's a level of death threats that are fine, maybe even beneficial, it doesn't make sense.
>> No. 29072 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 11:21 am
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>>29071
>which implies there's a level of death threats that are fine
There is. That level is zero. There's nothing wrong with this usage.
>> No. 29073 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 11:40 am
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>>29072
Zero death threats isn't a death threat, it's the absence of death threats.
>> No. 29074 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 11:53 am
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>>29073
... which is the acceptable level of death threats in a civilised society.
>> No. 29075 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 12:04 pm
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>>29074

If all death threats are toxic, then there's no need to call certain death threats toxic.
>> No. 29076 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 12:31 pm
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When you make toast, get it all buttered and lovely but then you notice some mould on the corner. Fucking penicillin, what's its end game?

>>29072
>>29071
Politicians are soft these days. It's a celebrity role that brings with it a good deal of controversy so they should expect death threats as part of the job. They've become a cloistered lot for a decades now but the way this is going risks putting us in shackles - remember back when candidates had to give their address on the ballot paper for example.
>> No. 29077 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 12:47 pm
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>>29076

Worse than that, they're trying to cling onto and use the terminology victimhood culture and use it to deflect criticism, which is entirely inappropriate and disrespectful considering the immense privilege that they, as the people literally in charge of country, occupy.

The fact that politicians are scared is a good thing. The fact that we still wield the power to remind them that they, the rulers, are beholden to us, the public, is a very fucking good thing.

If you start sympathising with politicians because the poor dears are a wittle bit fwitened by a mean tweet you're basically allowing a return to absolutist rule, we might as well dispense with democracy and let the fucking Queen make the laws.

Never forget, Otherlad, that the very concept of freedom and democracy we (theoretically) enjoy in the West was earned through bloodshed. You soft cunt.
>> No. 29078 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 1:50 pm
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>>29076
>they should expect death threats as part of the job
u fkin wot m7
>> No. 29079 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 2:09 pm
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>>29076
Well just snip that off and munch away.
>> No. 29080 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 2:12 pm
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Why are you both arguing about whether politicians should put up with death threats in exchange for their do-nothing £80k job? This is clearly the result of stupid people being allowed on the internet.

I've said it before, I'll say it again, it should be hard to get on the internet, at least more than 1 wire required, wireless is the devil, the utility of it should be slow and ungainly, not with all these pretty colours and it should be seen as a place for social outcasts.

No more politicians on our serious of tubes, Ms. Jenner can get back to playboy, ARE BAZZA can go on about the darkies in the pub like a normal person and the glut of middle of the road, average idiots who shit up our elite hangout circles can revive the telly.

Mass internet was a mistake.
>> No. 29082 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 2:16 pm
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>>29074
One of you's talking about the quality of the death threat and the other is talking about the quantity. There is no acceptable level of quality for a death threat, it's a death threat regardless. The acceptable level of quantity of death threats is zero. You're just talking at cross-purposes. If the politician is receiving death threats and that they're toxic ones, then he's talking nonsense as that poster said, because obviously there is a quantity above zero and the politician is talking about the quality.
>> No. 29083 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 2:23 pm
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>>29080
>Why are you both arguing about whether politicians should put up with death threats in exchange for their do-nothing £80k job?
I know, right? It should be obvious that nobody should have to put up with death threats as part of their job. Also stop threatening to kill people you have no intention of actually killing, and just kill already.
>> No. 29084 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 2:44 pm
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>>29083

It could also be argued as obvious that nobody should have to put up with being told what they can and can't say in any given situation.
>> No. 29085 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 3:01 pm
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>>29084
It could, but it would be obvious that anyone that did so would be wrong.
>> No. 29086 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 3:06 pm
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>>29085

I'm not sure I like your tone.
>> No. 29087 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 3:08 pm
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>>29079
Mould doesn't work that way. The visible patch you see is a bloom much like a mushroom but the organism/organisms reach deep into the loaf and as a rule you should at least toss out the two neighbouring slices.

But yeah, I couldn't be arsed and just cut it off risking an upset tummy.

>>29080
I do wonder why the hell Politicians thought twitter membership would be a good idea. It's not even just that they cry to twitter when things don't go their way but there's so little to gain from so much risk that they will say something crazy.

>>29083
>It should be obvious that nobody should have to put up with death threats as part of their job.
>>29085
>it would be obvious that anyone that did so would be wrong.

Awfully keen on talking about your feelings, aren't you?
>> No. 29088 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 3:08 pm
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>>29086
It should be obvious that you don't have to.
>> No. 29089 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 3:13 pm
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>>29088

Now I'm not in any way berating you or implying that your inflexible stance on such a trivial and overblown issue is unnecessarily divisive, all I'm saying is you probably don't get invited to many parties.
>> No. 29090 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 3:16 pm
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>>29089
I'm sure that used to be Tim, not Tom. I remember sending it to a friend named Tim because it was his name. It's that there Mandela effect.
>> No. 29091 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 3:17 pm
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>stooooop IIIWW
>For the umpteenth time

Fucking hell, the news needs to stop filming outside Parliament.
>> No. 29092 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 3:20 pm
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>>29090

Your mate Tim was probably sat there thinking "why the fuck has he sent me this? Does he think I'm Tom? Should I change my name to Tom so he notices me?"

Poor Tim.
>> No. 29093 Anonymous
19th October 2019
Saturday 4:28 pm
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>>29091
If they'd just hurry up and stop it already he wouldn't need to be there shouting in the first place.

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