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>> No. 23560 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 6:49 pm
23560 Minor angst and existential dread, Mk. I
We tend to have a lot of repeated threads here, but I also get the feeling people don't tend to post in /emo/ unless it's a big issue.

With this in mind I suggest that we have a thread for stuff that's got you down a bit and you need to get off your chest, without it being major enough to make an entire thread devoted to it. We can also use it as a go-to for minor relationship advice, work problems, social drama, and things like that.

Everyone gets down from time to time, let's put some Sisters of Mercy on and wallow together for a while.
Expand all images.
>> No. 23561 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 8:40 pm
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Me first? Me first. I'll try to be coherent and concise.

I don't think I'm on any spectrum, but I am a bit odd. I devote pretty much 100% of my free time to coding, working on whatever useless mad vision I feel like I have to realize, and I'm pretty dedicated. When I'm not inspired - occasional, but often - I do nothing and feel a bit sad.

In the last year I was made redundant by virtue of being the youngest member of a team due for cuts, and I've got a job instead working remotely for a reasonably nice small company. Web dev stuff, but I can't complain.

I enjoy working from home a lot. Much better than 9-5 office hours, which I see as a bit pointless as a coder, and my sleep cycle is always pretty wacky so I was often dinged for not being in on time in the past. None of this now. But I'm living in a flat in a town because of my old work, and now that I don't have to go out, and the wonders of online shopping, the last time I left the house was three months ago for a team meetup, and before that, three months again for the meetup previous.

I'm 24 years old and pretty much a hermit. I'd go out, but I've no friends here, and I hate meeting new people. I'm obnoxious and loud with friends, but meeting new people sets my social anxiety to p. much maximum. I've pretty much convinced myself I don't need to go out and I should be focusing on my side projects anyway, but to any rational person that would seem retarded, and, to be honest, I've been feeling straight-up, unadulterated, lonely lately.

I am also fat, gay, and single. Inviting school friends from round the country would require me to tidy away my dildo collection first. No-one has time for that.
>> No. 23562 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 9:12 pm
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>The last time I left the house was three months ago.

Seriously 3 months or is that hyperbole? You should at least be trying to get a basic level of exercise. You are going to be suffering some serious muscle atrophy otherwise, all the time getting fatter until the point you can't leave. I'm not saying do anything athletic, but make sure you go for a walk a few times a week. Homo sapiens weren't built to sit in one place all day, it messes with our health.
>> No. 23563 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 9:23 pm
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It's hyperbole, but only because I actually need to go out every 2 or 3 weeks to pick up a repeat prescription at the chemist. It would otherwise be 3 months.

I was very unfit before, but it is a little bit scary, to be honest, how even that can degrade; walking into town does actually feel a little tiring now.
>> No. 23564 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 9:37 pm
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Given other circumstances I can see myself in this situation (except I'm fairly sure I'm not gay, even if I secretly like Taylor Swifts older stuff).

I am also a coder (currently sans job) and I won't work remotely precisely because I value the social interaction.

Regarding social anxiety, you can beat it with practice.
>> No. 23565 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 10:03 pm
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Get up during daylight hours. Do some work at the library or a cafe. Exercise daily - a brisk half hour walk is fine. Find something to do with your time other than programming.

When you're a bit more used to being out in the world, look on meetup.com for something that piques your interest. A programming meetup, a board games club, whatever. You don't have to be the life and soul of the event, just turn up. Anxiety is always worse in anticipation than in fact; you might be dreading walking through the door, but that's likely to be the peak of your anxiety. If you're really struggling, speak to your GP.

Make plans. Short-term (today), medium-term (the next few weeks) and long-term (the next year). Try to stick to them, but don't beat yourself up if you let things slip. Focus on incremental progress and practical action.
>> No. 23566 Anonymous
16th November 2016
Wednesday 11:02 pm
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Biggest problem with this sort of thing is willpower. When I was on the dole I was pretty similar, I would only go out to the job centre and then come back to sit and play games because I was too despondent to do much else. It's all well and good people telling you that you need to do X, Y, and Z if, like me, you are very good at just saying "Ah well, there's always tomorrow."

You need to find something that scares you into action (not ending up like that fat guy on Youtube who gets angry at Blizzard), or a goal worthy of working towards (getting a boyfriend maybe?), or else you will find you can pretty much carry on like this indefinitely.
>> No. 23567 Anonymous
17th November 2016
Thursday 9:19 am
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Start doing yoga. Ideally with other people in a class, but if that's not feasible do it only. There is decent free stuff, even in YouTube.

As a certified yoga master I'll happily recommend stuff.
>> No. 23568 Anonymous
17th November 2016
Thursday 9:25 am
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Off the top of my head Yoga with Adriene is pretty good. She has a day by day 30 challenge which might be perfect for you. Do try to get some fresh air as well.
>> No. 23569 Anonymous
17th November 2016
Thursday 11:56 am
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I'd get down on her dog IYKWIM
>> No. 23570 Anonymous
18th November 2016
Friday 5:36 pm
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Anyone else been in a weird state of mind over the past few days? Angry or depressed?

Supermoon. Seriously.
>> No. 23571 Anonymous
18th November 2016
Friday 8:36 pm
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I guess I have been a little anxious and irritable lately. Although being surrounded by clowns I had assumed it was a normal reaction.

Maybe man-periods cycle with the moon like women's do?
>> No. 23572 Anonymous
18th November 2016
Friday 9:17 pm
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I've felt weirdly hyper and talkative. Maybe I'm moonkin
>> No. 23573 Anonymous
18th November 2016
Friday 9:41 pm
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Correlation does not imply causation.
>> No. 23574 Anonymous
19th November 2016
Saturday 1:54 am
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I don't know if this is minor or not, but I've just had a breakdown all thanks to a council gritter.

I haven't had a good day in 3 months, and today was about to be the first. What I thought was going to be a £500 repair job on my car turned out to be nothing, I got a Sperg and anxiety diagnosis so I can actually put some concrete shit behind what's wrong with me, I got out of the house for a while and had some social interaction with like minded people... then on the drive back I was behind the aforementioned gritter, but the gritting was so coarse and dense that I was sliding all over the road. I overtook the gritter and in the process it left a chip in my windscreen as well as a fair bit of paint damage.

While I am covered on my insurance it's just a shit end to what could have been my first 'looking up' day in months, and it all just came to a head. I just want to escape, to leave this fucking place and not come back. I ended up walking the streets near my house fucking sobbing like a little kid, eventually just lying on the pavement in the pissing rain at 1am.

Every FUCKING day something else happens, something shit. I haven't enjoyed anything pretty much in the last 3 months because there's always something shit happening to fuck it up. The nature of my job means my holidays are dictated to me, and the next one is Christmas. 5 more weeks, I don't know if I can do it. I need to leave, I have to.
>> No. 23575 Anonymous
19th November 2016
Saturday 2:00 am
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Keep calm, grit your teeth, and carry on.
>> No. 23576 Anonymous
19th November 2016
Saturday 8:35 am
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Good thread OP. If nobody responds to this it isn't the end of the world, it'd be nice just to vent.

My life isn't turning out how I wanted it to be nor expected it to be. I'm feeling a lot of pressure because people always assumed I'd go on to do good things, and currently I'm about to become unemployed due to redundancy.

I was always the smart kid in school who always did well, I went to secondary school, aced that too, then college, then got into a good university, not Oxbridge, but one filled with lots of their rejects.

I studied a traditional subject, did better than a load of my mates who did the same subject and even went out of my way to do extra, studying abroad and placements by winning scholarships. I'm working class, but a few of my posh mates heard this and then got their parents to hook them up with work abroad as they were worried I was doing too much.

We graduated and then poof, nothing. I couldn't get a job doing what I wanted, despite many of my mates with worse degrees and similar experience slipping into the jobs. I fought tooth and nail for a better job. which I've just lost, and even now, I can't get any responses for the job I originally wanted or worse jobs. I'm nearly two years out of university and I'll be sat in my room alone, with no money, applying for jobs at my parents houses.

I have friends who are diplomat trainees, doctors, lawyers on 70k, SPADs, investment bankers, you name it.

I'm honestly so fucking depressed I might just end it or run away and do something gimmicky like teach English in a warm place by the sea.

I know life isn't meant to be fair, but I just always cruised through smashing out the top grades, now I'm putting in the effort I'm rowing but my boat isn't moving.

Just to compound things, the job I am losing, I did far more work than people on double my salary, I never took the piss, was always in early, got great feedback from director level, never caused a fuss and was incredibly reliable. There are people who can't even be arsed turning up sometimes on double what I get.

Ah well, I guess this is what slipping through the cracks feels like.
>> No. 23577 Anonymous
19th November 2016
Saturday 10:34 am
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Autoglass will sort out windscreen damage for a tenner. Rub some T-Cut on those scratches and it'll be reet.

Fucking hell, lad. Stop focusing on what's gone wrong and focus on how to put it right. This is a piece of piss to sort out. It seems like you're actively looking for things, no matter how minor or trivial, to 'ruin' your day.
>> No. 23578 Anonymous
19th November 2016
Saturday 3:40 pm
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You mention work and jobs (and implicitly, social status) in almost every line here. I'm a workshy artist shirker type who is quite happy on the bottom rungs of society and I can find pleasures in life which aren't related to those very stilted, artificial and ultimately unrewarding notions of self-worth. Get a hobby.
>> No. 23579 Anonymous
19th November 2016
Saturday 4:19 pm
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Somewhat in the same boat but you're doing better than me, mate. I never went to college or Uni, I have no career, I just pick up whatever work I can where ever I can. Ended up just traveling around and figure I'll just keep going until I go broke or die or something. So yeah maybe travel? Pretty fun, lots of opportunities can come up, and you might be more likely to find decent work since you have a degree and all.
>> No. 23580 Anonymous
19th November 2016
Saturday 4:41 pm
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Evaluating your self worth is a fool's errand. There's always someone doing better than you, something more to achieve or acquire, some failure that you can't undo. It's like chasing the end of the rainbow - however fast you run, your destination will run away from you. Hippy-dippy as it might sound, the only truly durable sense of self is based on unconditional self acceptance. You might prefer to have a better job or earn more money, but it doesn't mean you're worth any less as a person if you don't achieve those things.
>> No. 23581 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 11:29 am
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Another lad here, but I relate a lot to that need to measure myself by my achievements.

For me, unconditional self-acceptance is too high a demand. What I've been focusing on the past year is to be realistic about the 'scope' of what I can achieve. As I've become older I've reluctantly accepted I'm never going to be a heart surgeon or an astronaut, but I am certainly going to aim for the high end of what I can become, within my own scope of possibilities.
>> No. 23582 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 12:32 pm
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Self-acceptance is an ongoing process rooted in self-compassion. All too often, we're our own harshest critic; we say things to ourselves that we would never say to other people. We treat ourselves with needless, gratuitous cruelty. If we treated a partner or a child like that, we'd rightly be accused of abuse.

I learned a useful exercise from Steven C Hayes. Whenever you're being self-critical, imagine that you're speaking to yourself as an eight year old child. Visualise your younger self stood in front of you. Would you harshly criticise that person, or would you be gentle and supportive?

Self-criticism is a perverse kind of defence mechanism. When you introduce people to the idea of self-compassion, there's often a reflexive backlash along the lines of "I don't need that soft shite, I'm a grown man who can take a kicking". Being harsh on yourself is a denial of your own vulnerability. To treat yourself compassionately is to admit that you're not a big hard bastard after all, that a deeply buried part of you is small and scared and sad. In many ways it's harder to be kind to yourself than to be cruel, but it's ultimately much healthier. Life is difficult enough.
>> No. 23584 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 4:06 pm
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I like thin women. But the world is becoming fatter and it is affecting my ability to feel sexually aroused. The number of people I encounter that I find physically attractive has dropped to the point where I feel sexually frustrated.

I feel like it is impossible to share my position publicly because being overweight is so normalized and people will treat it as selfish and entitled. Only 36% of population aren't actually fat fucks and it is only getting worse, god knows how small the fraction is that actually have the kind of figure I find attractive (being able to make out the pelvic bone is insanely hot to me). Beauty might only be skin deep but I can hardly have a conversation with my penis and convince it that it is fat-shaming, the dick wants what the dick wants.
>> No. 23585 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 4:14 pm
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Have you tried the Anna community? They would love someone like you.
>> No. 23586 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 4:18 pm
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>the Anna community

The who?
>> No. 23587 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 4:44 pm
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I hadn't really seen things that way before. Particularly what you say here:
>Being harsh on yourself is a denial of your own vulnerability

It is true I think and reinforce things about myself, to the point where it's virtually become automatic and subconscious, that wouldn't ever occur to me about another person. Even growing up, I couldn't take pride in whatever achievements or talents that I had, as I was always making up ground in my head for a set of unbelievably nasty inner-voices.

When things are going well for me, it's usually during times where my self-esteem is based off the sheer effort I'm putting in every day. This is unsustainable, I burn out, I get frustrated with lack of progress, and I'm back to feeling shit about myself. Then it's hard to do productive things because I almost feel I don't deserve the reward, until evenetually I become so angry with the inertia, I put some Herculean regime in place again, feel pretty amazing about myself, and the cycle repeats. A local psychiatrist said I likely belonged to some sort of the bipolar spectrum of disorders.

I'm dangerously close to hijacking this thread, but you're on to something there. More regular and consistent practice of self-compassion might keep me stable enough to make steady progress and not have my sense of self completely crash every 6 - 8 months.
>> No. 23588 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 4:57 pm
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It's spelt Ana and >>23585 can fuck off, having the very top of the iliac crest showing through at the hips is very normal in people with a healthy body composition.

That said, we all know how useless BMI is as soon as you get to a trained/athletic build with significant muscle mass, but most people in the population aren't that so it's a fine rule of thumb for them.
>> No. 23589 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 5:06 pm
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Quite true. The way I tend to think of BMI is that it's a tool to measure the health of populations rather than individuals.

Not meaning to sound too "no shit, m8", but have you tried looking for girls in fitness circles? Physically active hobbies could probably lead you to women with a build more to your liking.
>> No. 23590 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 5:07 pm
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Seems unhealthy to fetishise underweight women. Pictures from the Siege of Aleppo must be a wankfest for you.
>> No. 23591 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 5:08 pm
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>Not meaning to sound too "no shit, m8", but have you tried looking for girls in fitness circles? Physically active hobbies could probably lead you to women with a build more to your liking.
Also smackhead circles are quite good.
>> No. 23592 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 5:19 pm
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Don't begrudge the lad his tastes. He's said nothing demeaning about girls of different builds, just that he likes thin ones and people are generally getting bigger.
>> No. 23593 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 5:36 pm
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He called people of healthy weight "fat fucks." Obviously he is a fat-shaming misogynist.
>> No. 23594 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 5:47 pm
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I'm at the end of my research thesis. I just need to get <10k words down which should be done by after Christmas if not before.

The problem is I seem to have hit a brick-wall in my motivation to get things done slipping me into procrastinating by perfectionism and days where I just get nothing done at all. Its been like this since around February and been a steady decline in my output as I just seem to no longer feel confident in my own abilities or care about my research topic.

Come to think of it its been a month since I should have sent a draft off to my supervisor but I'm still not where we planned me to be and while I can deal with a telling off I don't feel like my work is ready for checking. Mostly because as I said my output has been so bad and I'm now ashamed of it.

I'll add to the voices that share how you feel. There are many people I know from university who are currently ahead of me on the game of life.

Rather than echo the sentiment I recommend Dale Carnegie's How To Stop Worrying And Start Living (available in audiobook format). It may sound like it doesn't entirely fit with your issue but there are a few memorable points on this including that in life you may not be a big towering tree like those you may compare yourself to but if you're a bush you should work at being the best damn bush you can be. That's enough for me.

I recommend hippie chicks if you can bite your tongue on their logical inconsistencies m8. Trust me.

They also tend to not put so much value on status or looks so you can bat way above your average
>> No. 23595 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 5:51 pm
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They don't shower and I like eating women out. It is disgusting.

What is your research thesis on? You don't have to be specific, just the general subject area would be nice to know.
>> No. 23597 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 6:24 pm
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>They don't shower and I like eating women out. It is disgusting.

I've never noticed a problem with it. I enjoy my long hot showers but there is something to be said for how your body handles itself if its getting nothing beyond cold showers, a light soap and a good (well...you' know) diet.

>What is your research thesis on? You don't have to be specific, just the general subject area would be nice to know.

The legality of humanitarian intervention in the African Union. A rough background is Africa has had enough of genocides and things of that nature after Rwanda (and so on) so its given itself the right to intervene in certain circumstances. The problem is its not exactly legal if you don't have permission from the United Nations Security Council. Or is it?!

This has become a bigger issue recently as Burundi was threatened with AU intervention given it shows all the same signs as Rwanda did before its own genocide with the international community busy with other things. If you want me to ruin your day: Tutsis are already being killed in the country (Amnesty International released satellite evidence of mass graves earlier in the year) and next year there might be a few million less of them in the world if nothing gets done which looks likely unless Kagame is going to save the day again.
>> No. 23598 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 6:39 pm
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I can highly recommend the book The Happiness Trap by Russ Harris. The 'trap' of the title is the idea that we can force ourselves to be happy, that if we only work hard enough we can eradicate all negative feelings. If you believe on some level that everything should always be perfect, then you're setting yourself up for a harsh double-whammy. When things do go wrong, you have to deal with the thing that happened and your own frustration, disappointment and self-criticism.

The approach presented in the book is based on self-awareness and acceptance. Sometimes you'll be happy, sometimes you won't. Sometimes you'll feel confident, sometimes you won't. Negative thoughts, feelings and experiences are a natural part of life. By trying to control our own thoughts and feelings, we just make them more powerful.

Don't think of a pink elephant. Don't think of a pink elephant. Whatever you do, don't think of a pink elephant. Thinking about pink elephants is unbearably awful. If you think of a pink elephant, that means you're a terrible person. You'll never be happy if you think about pink elephants. Don't think of a pink elephant.

That seems absurd, but we do it to ourselves all the time. We all have things we can't bear to remember, thoughts we think make us bad people, feelings we distract ourselves from or deny. By suppressing those things, we end up in this futile struggle against nature. It's like trying to force a beach ball underwater. The beach ball will always come back to the surface. The only choice you have is how hard you struggle to push it down. You can learn to stop struggling and live with difficult thoughts and feelings rather than fighting against them.

>> No. 23599 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 6:40 pm
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Did your research cover the AU intervention in Somalia, and how every invading forces trying to "stop" terrorists in Somalia end up joining AMISOM?

To some degree I think AU interventions are American sanctioned operations designed to keep the "peace" which is favourable to US interests. There is nothing really humanitarian about it. The civil war in Somali could have ended in 1993, but American intervention, because white people were sad about Africa being a shithole, meant it lasts to this day. It again could have ended in 2006, but AMISOM (AU forces), Ethiopian forces, and Somali warlords made sure it didn't. That's how Somalia ended up with a weak government backed by the west surrounded by ruthless terrorists.

AU is a sham.
>> No. 23600 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 6:44 pm
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Take up distance running or triathlon. Not a pick of fat on those girls.

Also, thank you for leaving all the curvy women for me. Unrealistic beauty standards have created an all-you-can-eat buffet for chubby chasers.
>> No. 23601 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 7:36 pm
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My ex fiance was a distance runner. I wish I'd have murdered her.
>> No. 23602 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 7:43 pm
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>Unrealistic beauty standards have created an all-you-can-eat buffet for chubby chasers.

You sure on that, lad? There seems to be a lot of fat pride at the minute and I have known the odd heifer thinking she's Gods gift because of all the chubby chasers, such as yourself, after them.
>> No. 23603 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 9:45 pm
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>You sure on that, lad?

Ooooohhh yes. The ratio of fat women to chubby chasers is astronomically high. More than half the population are overweight or obese, but "BBW" ranks lower than "cartoon" or "step mom" in porn site searches. To the overwhelming majority of men, "fat" and "ugly" are practically synonymous. You might hear about fat pride and chubby chasing online, but it's notably absent at chucking out time in a provincial All Bar One.

To me, this image is the epitome of feminine perfection. I'd push Scarlett Johansson or Beyonce Knowles out of the way to get to her. I'd drag my balls through broken glass to hear her fart through a walkie talkie. When you have aesthetic preferences like that, you live in a different world to most men.

I'm a 7/10 at best, but most of the women I pursue think that I'm well out of their league. They're used to being the dregs at the end of the night. They're used to being slowly elbowed out by someone who is trying to pull their thin friend. They're used to being laughed at in clothes shops when they ask "do you have this in a size 22?". For all the fat positivity that floats around on Tumblr, society is still brutally cruel towards fat women.
>> No. 23604 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 9:47 pm
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>To me, this image is the epitome of feminine perfection
She has a pretty face but genuinely looks like her body has elephantiasis. Is there a line between what is attractive and what's a weird fetish?
>> No. 23605 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 9:49 pm
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>most of the women I pursue think that I'm well out of their league. They're used to being the dregs at the end of the night.

This says more about you than them.
>> No. 23606 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 9:58 pm
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Even the massive upper arms and thighs? Some people can carry weight well and some people can't. That lass can't. Her body shape is all wrong. She hasn't filled out nicely.
>> No. 23607 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 10:15 pm
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>For all the fat positivity that floats around on Tumblr, society is still brutally cruel towards fat women.

Yeah but there are enough guys like you plus desperate lads who'll take anything they can get to mean they'll still get laid and have relationships.

As for myself, I'm probably going to die alone because of my inability to find overweight women attractive. Guess I could just move to a non-Anglosphere country, but I can't learn foreign languages to save my life.
>> No. 23608 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 10:26 pm
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>Is there a line between what is attractive and what's a weird fetish?

Don't know, don't care.


It's shit, but it's true. Women of a certain size are marginalised to an extraordinary degree. Many people just can't conceive of big women as objects of sexual desire. When I brought my first proper girlfriend home, my mum thought it was some sort of practical joke; I honestly think she'd be happier if I was gay. People routinely treat me like some sort of deviant. When I'm walking down the street with a big woman, I overhear snide comments all the time. Frankly, you're a bunch of bastards.


Especially the upper arms, especially the thighs, especially the belly. Christ, I love a big round belly. I love a pair of thighs you could drown in.
>> No. 23609 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 10:32 pm
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I can empathise. When I went to uni, I foolishly left my computer at home and my dad went on it, and saw some pictures of fat lasses (including the girl in your pictures), and ribbed me for it mercilessly. My ex was obese and black, and he constantly gave me shit for it. My current gf is also obese, and I'm not looking forward to him meeting her as he can be very cruel to fat lasses.
>> No. 23610 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 11:08 pm
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>Christ, I love a big round belly.

That's not a round belly, though. You can clearly see the rolls of fat. Again you've posted a picture of a woman who cannot carry the weight.
>> No. 23611 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 11:11 pm
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He has a weird fetish. Let him be.
>> No. 23612 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 11:23 pm
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>Women of a certain size are marginalised to an extraordinary degree.

Am I a terrible person for not having much sympathy for someone who is marginalised for the most part as a result of their own greed?
>> No. 23613 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 11:25 pm
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>I recommend hippie chicks if you can bite your tongue on their logical inconsistencies m8. Trust me.

Which reminds me about my own problems.

Me and my girlfriend recently went "on a break" and then got together again after about a months worth of not speaking, and intolerable horniness on both our parts.

In the relatively short intervening time, she has got dreds, a surprisingly tasteful tattoo, and changed her style of dress, and I can't help but think she's done it to try and be more appealing to me. She's the least mental girlfriend I've ever had too, she doesn't show symptoms of any major neurosis at all in fact. We spend our weekends camping and taking acid.

It's perfect but I am deeply suspicious of how perfect it is, and frankly the lack of any sort of need to "work" at, any need to put effort in to the relationship, because she's obviously so head over heels for me, is just making me feel rather arsed. As a wise man (Lemmy) once said, "You know the chase, is better than the catch, you know".

I know a lot of lads, especially those who struggle with the lasses, would kill for what I have now. But I just feel a bit bored with it. What can I do to help myself appreciate it?
>> No. 23614 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 11:36 pm
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It's the lowest of the low hanging fruit, though.

I'm partial to a chubster, this is an example from the first page of Googling 'BBW'. As you will see, it's a nice full figure. You can get women larger than this still in the same proportions. Many women can't carry this weight well and get rolls of fat, cellulite and those grotesque gargantuan upper arms. A thick, large woman is a nice sight to behold. A woman carrying more weight than is attractive for her frame is anything but.
>> No. 23615 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 11:38 pm
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Jesus Fucking Christ.
>> No. 23616 Anonymous
20th November 2016
Sunday 11:46 pm
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You see what I mean, though? It's one nice full belly rather than one of those weird ones where it splits into three separate sections because the woman in question doesn't have the frame for that kind of weight. Again another quick Google picture .
>> No. 23617 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 12:04 am
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You seem bewildered by the idea of personal taste. Some men would consider that woman to be very fat (namely the skinny-chaser who started this whole discussion and prefers to see bones sticking out), some would say she's just slightly curvy.

I like wobbly bits on a lady. If you don't then that's fine, just don't be a cock about it. Try to avoid describing perfectly normal body parts as "grotesque". Having a preference is fine. Denigrating women for their bodies is a dick move.
>> No. 23618 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 12:04 am
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A woman of this size who looks good in real life is a very rare thing.

That first picture you posted is rather unsubtly shopped- In reality both of her arms are in contact with overspilled belly flab, but they've made it look like she has an "hourglass" figure.

The second picture, yeah, she's nice. She's what I'd genuinely call chubby rather than fat, though, and even then it's just a flattering photograph. Laid in bed next to her where she's all spilling off to one side like a level 34 Muk and it's a different story.

My lass is hardly a stick insect, she has a bit of meat on her bones, but fat is another thing, instinctually we find it unappealing in the same way as you would if a woman was greyhound/holocaust skinny.

The fact is that fat itself is unattractive beyond a certain point, in my opinion; the big curvy figure is attractive to you, but that's not taking account of the nasty cellulite flab folds that inevitably occur in real life. You can't photoshop a real girl to hide the stretch marks and eczema around the folds where she can't wash properly. You can't photoshop the stank of fatty sweat. Know what I'm saying?
>> No. 23619 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 12:07 am
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Look what you did, you Ana chasing filth. Look at what you started. Look!
>> No. 23620 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 12:08 am
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I'd fuck this, not a chubby chaser either. It helps that she could be an 8 if she shed 40 pounds.
>> No. 23621 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 1:13 am
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You should type the way he speaks. That was just shit.
>> No. 23622 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 1:21 am
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>I recommend hippie chicks if you can bite your tongue on their logical inconsistencies m8. Trust me.
>if you can bite your tongue on their logical inconsistencies

And there's the rub. I love everything about the hippy lifestyle the visuals (those girls in your pic are stunning to me), the drugs and I'm rather partial to camping, but the beliefs drive me mad mad mad.


The problem there is that then I'd have to be doing long distance running, which is probably great if you like it, but strikes me as the kind of thing that I couldn't half arse commit to.


I show no remorse. we are living in the age of the chubby chaser. At least someone can be happy. I'm clearly an out dated fossil with my primitive notions that people shouldn't be a weight that negatively affects their health, and society has a moral duty to discourage obesity during an epidemic of it. not that I can be too high and mighty, this is ultimately just about what makes my dick twitch after all
>> No. 23623 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 1:28 am
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Guy with low self-esteem lowers standards - dates women that look like Rosie O'Donnell. Many such cases. Sad!
>> No. 23624 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 2:04 am
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Not even close. You are bad at this.
>> No. 23625 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 2:21 am
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That was exactly how his twitter account sounds.
>> No. 23626 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 2:27 am
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No it doesn't. It actually sounds like how he speaks. Are you slow?
>> No. 23627 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 3:01 am
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No, just more aware of parody than you are.

>> No. 23628 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 5:56 am
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African conflicts are very interesting though, especially how multifaceted it gets in terms of international relations. Multiple rivers, ethnic groups and mining rights within certain regions require a greater deal of co-operation (and not so co-operative militia funding) between powers. The situation in Ethiopia with the Oromo people are an example of how marginalised groups can become a serious security threat to stability within the region.

As for this thread, I hate myself and everyone around me so I deal with it through murder/rampage fantasies, especially of the people who are being mean to me.
>> No. 23631 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 12:43 pm
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I've recently returned to education part time to fix some grades that I fucked up the last time I took the course and I increasingly find myself questioning why I bothered. Well actually I know exactly why I bothered; I'm hoping to hook a control room operator job in a CCGT power plant for some sweet easy ££££ but when I met and got to know the others on the course I felt a bit left behind as there are some very ambitious people on the course, I am also frustrated at the slow pace the course is going and find myself increasingly uninterested in the subjects at hand.

I'm going to complete the course, I will get a good grade because thats just what I do but fucking hell does it feel cathartic to write this down.
>> No. 23632 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 2:03 pm
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What kind of course is it? I have been thinking about good courses to take.
>> No. 23633 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 2:54 pm
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You feel both left behind and frustrated by the slow pace?
>> No. 23634 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 4:03 pm
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Science and maths, you should be aware that if you're over 18 you'll need to pay even for level 2 qualifications these days unless you have a funding source.


What I meant is: I feel left behind by my own lack of ambition, I'm blown away by others want and desire for stuff and my own lack there of. I'm trying to work on changing my mindset but as I said I'm finding myself questioning myself a lot. Thanks for making me clarify that though it is a bit messy.
>> No. 23635 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 7:10 pm
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Probably you weren't a good fit for education in the first place, right? Just knuckle down and do what you need to do, keep reminding yourself of the end goal. Presumably you're old enough to know how naive those ambitious ones are too- so try not to let your own cynicism get in the way, because it' not without merit.

I'm in my mid 20s and doing some studying for a qualification the work is paying for, and fuck me does going to college wind me up. The tutors are unhelpful, spiteful bastards who treat everyone in the course (all adults) like teenagers, the department head is the biggest arsehole of all, there's nobody higher up we can complain to so there's no alternative but to just stomach it.

There are some things in life you can't meaningfully fix and just have to deal with I suppose.
>> No. 23636 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 7:13 pm
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>Science and maths, you should be aware that if you're over 18 you'll need to pay even for level 2 qualifications these days unless you have a funding source.

Wrong, if you're under 24 you can get on a level 3 course for naff all.
>> No. 23637 Anonymous
21st November 2016
Monday 7:17 pm
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>Science and maths
You wot? Is that all you need to end up in the control room of a CCGT station? Just A Levels?


I think I am wasting my life away.
>> No. 23641 Anonymous
27th November 2016
Sunday 1:26 pm
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This morning I woke up. I think that was a mistake and I regret it. Instead of just going back to sleep I decided to solider on and now I feel just awful. Out of a sense of decorum I decided drinking vodka at 8am wasn't the way I wanted to manage this, and instead watched a, and I use the term in the broadest sense here, ‘documentary’ on netflix where they mashed a bunch of interviews from comedians talking about how miserable they all are together, then I went for a walk round the park and back. Everything was as dull and as mediocre as it was the last time I went there except because it was 10 am on a Sunday there were grubby noisy humans everywhere.

There really isn't much point to this post other than to vent that sometimes existing feels over rated even when you can't put your finger on why, and I want validation from strangers on the internet of this point.
>> No. 23642 Anonymous
27th November 2016
Sunday 4:17 pm
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I woke up, watched Laurel and Hardy... That's all I've done. My self-esteem has been scraping along the ground recently. I'll be fine in a week or so.
>> No. 23645 Anonymous
27th November 2016
Sunday 4:54 pm
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>>23641 >>23642
Both of you need to do something new. Try an evening session of something you've never done before, go to a community centre or cafe you'd not normally go to, just get out of the house a bit and break your routine. Never underestimate the rejuvenating effect having an open-mind towards a bit of novelty can have on the old existential dread.
>> No. 23646 Anonymous
27th November 2016
Sunday 4:57 pm
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Will it ever get better?
>> No. 23648 Anonymous
27th November 2016
Sunday 6:34 pm
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I just woke up feeling awful today. I didn't really sleep properly last night and have been on a strict diet, I think I'm just emotionally crashing from exhaustion. I think your advice is solid, but it's not really for my problem. Good night’s sleep and I’ll be tickerty boo.
>> No. 23650 Anonymous
27th November 2016
Sunday 10:15 pm
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Yes. Slowly, and there will definitely be a strong possibility for relapse, but start looking after yourself as you would a close friend that was struggling and things will start to get gradually better. Eat a bit better. Try to go to bed and wake up at more regular times. In winter, try to get at least an hour outside in the the sunlight a day - shifting your sleep cycle to less night-owlish one will help here. Just do one of these at a time, one little thing that you'd do to care for that close friend who you'd act out of complete love for, and don't worry about the next step. And don't beat yourself up if you don't manage it one day, put it behind you and just try a little bit again the next. Baby steps.
>> No. 23679 Anonymous
4th December 2016
Sunday 6:24 pm
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How can I turn myself off? Like a computer, just switch off, and switch back on some time later? I'm getting tired and I need to shut down for a couple of years.
>> No. 23680 Anonymous
4th December 2016
Sunday 7:06 pm
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I can tell you what works for me:

Turn off the lights. Sit on a cold surface, like the floor or wooden chair, in a cool, quiet room. Listen to a clock or a watch ticking. Breathe in for four-to-five seconds, hold in for four-to-five seconds, breathe out for four-to-five seconds, hold out for four-to-five seconds. Repeat until your body temperature has dropped and your thoughts have slowed down. This usually takes about five or ten minutes.

If you have one, put on a sleeping mask and lie down in your bed. Think about something you'd like to dream about, and let the thought drift through free association as your body readjusts to the temperature of your sheets. You should find yourself getting to sleep by this point.

Shutdown takes about 20 odd minutes but it's reliable.
>> No. 23681 Anonymous
4th December 2016
Sunday 7:12 pm
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I wrote this entire post not reading the 'years' bit.

Oh well, something for you insomniaclads.
>> No. 23682 Anonymous
4th December 2016
Sunday 7:12 pm
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>> No. 23689 Anonymous
5th December 2016
Monday 6:53 pm
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I am filled with sorrow. I'm finding it hard not to burst into tears in public a lot.
>> No. 23690 Anonymous
5th December 2016
Monday 7:09 pm
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Try some antidepressants.
>> No. 23691 Anonymous
5th December 2016
Monday 7:57 pm
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It will pass when your period stops.
>> No. 23692 Anonymous
5th December 2016
Monday 8:57 pm
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No, I don't need drugs, just time.
Hilarious m8.
>> No. 23695 Anonymous
5th December 2016
Monday 10:43 pm
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Do you wanna talk about it? Is there anything you want to share?
>> No. 23702 Anonymous
6th December 2016
Tuesday 10:00 am
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No, it turns out what I want to do is make a series of bad decisions that will prolong this, meaning it will take even more time to get over.

Sage for vaguebooking.
>> No. 23727 Anonymous
8th December 2016
Thursday 1:56 pm
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How does one get over a fear of rejection & failure?
>> No. 23728 Anonymous
8th December 2016
Thursday 2:04 pm
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By valuing your desire to achieve more.
>> No. 23729 Anonymous
8th December 2016
Thursday 3:24 pm
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Ask yourself what is the worst that could happen, if you can then write out the worry and the possible answers on a notepad, things of that nature.

The issue people seem to have is that whilst they will certainly overanalyze a problem they won't do so in an objective fashion so they just go around in circles worrying themselves about nothing.
>> No. 23799 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 8:47 pm
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Lads has anybody had a week or two where they don't feel themselves ever? What did you do?

Normally I'm absolutely fine, of sound mental footing and all that, but for about a week I've been waking up and feeling a sudden sense of dread, I've lost my appetite and barely eat more than one meal a day and have been shitting myself constantly because of lack of nutrition. I've randomly fell asleep and I have felt strong mood swings, even though things in my life are alright.

I've never felt like this before, and now I'm starting to feel much better, but I am a bit concerned hw it all suddenly came along. Anybody know this feel? I've no idea what happened to me.
>> No. 23800 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 9:11 pm
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If it's a sudden unexplained change of mood or personality I suggest it might be worth talking to your GP about.
>> No. 23805 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 9:21 pm
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There is a lot of truth to this. I realised that at some point if I wanted to get anywhere in terms of career/social/general life terms, and actually do the things I want to do, I'd need to get used to embarrassing myself. Being embarrassed doesn't necessarily get any easier or more pleasant, but it seems insignificant when you realise that at least a little bit of it is inevitable toward achieving anything. I think how people deal with embarrassment, emotionally, varies from person to person, but when you want something that badly it does fade from importance in a very tangible way.
>> No. 23806 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 9:22 pm
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How on fucking earth did that just happen?
>> No. 23807 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 9:28 pm
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You can say that again.
>> No. 23808 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 9:32 pm
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how embarrassing
>> No. 23809 Anonymous
17th December 2016
Saturday 9:34 pm
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Just delete the fucking posts. Click the Anonymous.
>> No. 23857 Anonymous
20th December 2016
Tuesday 10:40 pm
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Dear Santa,

For Chrimbus I would like the gift of being a normal, socially adjusted neurotypical.


A sperg with crippling anxiety
>> No. 23858 Anonymous
20th December 2016
Tuesday 11:06 pm
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My aunt is kind of a snobby bitch who always comes up to me at family gatherings and says insulting things in a subtle enough way that it takes me a moment to figure out what she was actually saying, by which point she's sidled off. I'm quite tempted to buy her some sort of children's toy "from santa, to help you keep your mind active".
>> No. 23859 Anonymous
20th December 2016
Tuesday 11:34 pm
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Do it, lad. Give her a taste of her own medicine.
>> No. 23860 Anonymous
20th December 2016
Tuesday 11:53 pm
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I'm just going to shut her down with "Not right now"/"Can I just stop you there?" as soon as she opens her mouth next time, it's cheaper.
>> No. 23861 Anonymous
21st December 2016
Wednesday 12:03 am
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How can you tell she's going to say something like that before she says it?
>> No. 23862 Anonymous
21st December 2016
Wednesday 12:46 am
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Because that's the only reason she's spoken to me for the past three years.
>> No. 23864 Anonymous
21st December 2016
Wednesday 1:43 pm
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I must have been a very naughty boy this year as I didn't even get a bag of coal, I got a bag of festering diarrhoea dropped on me early when I had a full on breakdown at work resulting in me getting sent home, and everyone there thinking I'm a grade A cunt (which I am, all I want to do is climb out of my skin and be someone else)
>> No. 23867 Anonymous
21st December 2016
Wednesday 7:39 pm
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Why did you have a breakdown?
>> No. 23868 Anonymous
22nd December 2016
Thursday 7:25 am
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Mostly fuck Christmas. I never get to see my family, I never get to see friends, I never get to party and I can't talk to anyone about it. I've chosen this career and it's all my own doing, but sometimes the fucking loneliness, which I was well aware of in the beginning, gets a bit much.

End of rant.
>> No. 23869 Anonymous
22nd December 2016
Thursday 12:23 pm
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What line of work you in? Merchant navy?
>> No. 23870 Anonymous
22nd December 2016
Thursday 12:46 pm
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I wish I knew, I've just been feeling more and more helpless and worthless for the past couple of months and it all came to a head yesterday. That's the thing that annoys me, I'm not a 5 year old but I can't stop myself acting like one.
>> No. 23871 Anonymous
22nd December 2016
Thursday 2:09 pm
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I acquire information.
>> No. 23872 Anonymous
22nd December 2016
Thursday 4:26 pm
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You dick, just tell us you're GCHQlad or what have you before I start being happy you're alone.
>> No. 23873 Anonymous
22nd December 2016
Thursday 4:38 pm
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I'm happy that you are spending the best time of your life alone. Hopefully, it will only get worse for you from here on out.
>> No. 23874 Anonymous
25th December 2016
Sunday 5:51 pm
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Go teach English. I suggest JET. It'll be great for you.
>> No. 23875 Anonymous
25th December 2016
Sunday 9:03 pm
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I've been with my gf for a few years but I have a weird (and maybe unique?) problem. I get jealous over things that happened _before_ I met her. Say she's tagged in a picture from years ago where she happens to be having fun I will get a horrible pang of envy possibly because she dared to look happy without me. It is painful and I can feel it in my stomach and chest.

At this point i don't know what I want more - to love her or to own her. I feel ashamed and sad.
>> No. 23876 Anonymous
25th December 2016
Sunday 9:28 pm
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I feel you, and have had similar feelings about people I've been involved with. When you really intensely love someone to that degree, it can cause you to learn uncomfortable things about yourself. You have no reason to feel shame if you make an effort to change that pattern of thought; love her as a human being, not as an ideal.
>> No. 23877 Anonymous
26th December 2016
Monday 1:40 am
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Seconding this.
>> No. 23878 Anonymous
26th December 2016
Monday 1:56 am
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Met this las about a year and a half ago and it's been going great. She had to re-activate her facebook because she decided that she'd benefit from meeting new friends at her new job. I finally got to see pictures of her before she met me, and she mentioned that 10 months prior to meeting me, she broke off a 8 year long relationship. That's heavy lads. So no doubt she had a lot of photos with her ex, and no doubt she looked happy in a lot of them. It felt weird, and yes, you feel a bit jealous knowing that her ex may have appeared to be better looking than you, and you're second rate to them.

But that how YOU see YOURSELF, to her, you could be the guy has been waiting for.
>> No. 23879 Anonymous
26th December 2016
Monday 5:19 am
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Be careful with this, lad. One of my friends went out with a lad who used to get sad because he'd dwell on the fact he didn't take her virginity and she'd slept with people before him. In the end she had to break it off as he became so suffocatingly possessive.
>> No. 23880 Anonymous
26th December 2016
Monday 10:35 am
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Have you considered your own background and your own life before hand?

Do you feel angry because you haven't got your own memories? You probably do, chances are you went out and had fun and met girls before her, yet they mean very little in the way of spending time with her now. That's probably how she feels about your memories too. Whilst you have them and they're nice to look back on, they mean very little, and it's probably the same for her too.

Visualising it like this should help you a lot.
>> No. 24040 Anonymous
13th January 2017
Friday 11:48 pm
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I am bored.

Or rather, I think I may simply be boring.

A few years ago I used to be engaged with all sorts of little hobbies and projects, I participated in communities and events and so on. But these days, I've gradually fallen out of the "scene" with everything I used to enjoy, and when I really think about it the fact is I can't be arsed any more.

I've grown out of the music I used to be into. I don't have the attention span to focus on the productive hobbies I used to practice. I no longer have the patience even to stick with a videogame for more than a few hours or read a good book. I just tend to sit and passively absorb some long-form Youtube video, whilst scrolling through some shite imageboard posts.

I think I have simply reached a stage in life where changing my identity in some ways is inevitable, but the trouble is I can't muster the effort it takes to make new friends, discover new interests, see new places. I'm bored. I can't be arsed.

I hang out with less people than I used to. I don't remember the last time I made a new friend, unless work colleagues count. Tinder dates definitely don't count, although I wish there was an equivalent of Tinder to just find people you can hang out with.

I'm in a relationship with someone I'm not sure I really love. She's great in a lot of ways but I don't feel any real passion toward her, I seem to just be with her because the cold, calculating part of my brain says that at least you get sex and she cleans your flat. I don't feel any passion for anything much any more, come to think about it. I feel as though the conquest for new, more attractive sexual partners would temporarily give my life some sort of direction and focus but also leave me feeling ultimately more hollow as a result.

I think I may have pushed the boat out a bit far with psychedelic drugs over the last couple of years. Witnessing life from a higher point of view seems to have left everything that felt meaningful before seem insignificant and fleeting. Morality seems so arbitrary now, the direction a life takes seems so random and inconsequential when considered amongst the billions of others.

Theoretically my life is pretty good and I don't have anything to really worry about. I wouldn't say I'm depressed- I've been truly depressed before, and this doesn't feel like that. I just feel listless, numb, bored.

Maybe it's just January. Maybe its just the shit weather and lack of good social company. I don't know, but the sense has been pervading me for a while now. I bought a load of booze in before Christmas and intended to party by myself, something I would have enjoyed a few years ago. I only opened on bottle of beer and still haven't touched any of the spirits. I just can't really be arsed.

Actually I don't think my life has ever been "right" since I got sucked in and then fucked over by a lass way out of my leage several years ago. Feels like the last five or six years have entirely been spent rebuilding after I went all in and ended up getting cleaned out. The process has hollowed me out and left a bitter taste around all the things that made me who I was then.

You know what, fuck knows, whatever. It's not like I'm on the streets. I have a decent-ish job and all the necessities of modern life. I just needed to spill my guts, since I don't want to alienate any of my few remaining real friends by making them think I'm a self-absorbed emo wanker. But if any of you read to the end of that mess, thanks.
>> No. 24041 Anonymous
13th January 2017
Friday 11:52 pm
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Life m8.
>> No. 24042 Anonymous
13th January 2017
Friday 11:57 pm
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Not to denigrate your problems or anything but it does seem like lots of people are feeling more down than usual at the moment. I figure most people have SAD to some degree.
>> No. 24043 Anonymous
14th January 2017
Saturday 12:49 am
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To be sure they are rather trivial compared to some folk's issues, hence why I posted here rather than in a new thread. It's just odd that I've not really felt this way in previous winters.


>> No. 24044 Anonymous
14th January 2017
Saturday 2:27 am
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You're me, except I'm single. Although my cold, calculating part of my brain does sometimes think to find some passionless relationship to at least get sex and a cleaner flat.
>> No. 24045 Anonymous
14th January 2017
Saturday 2:28 am
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Every time I scroll past that OP image I think it's Alexander Armstrong.
>> No. 24046 Anonymous
14th January 2017
Saturday 4:45 am
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>I wouldn't say I'm depressed- I've been truly depressed before, and this doesn't feel like that. I just feel listless, numb, bored.

What you've described in your post absolutely sounds like depression.

GPs and A&E doctors often use a test called the PHQ-2 to identify patients who might have undiagnosed depression. It uses just the following two questions:

Over the past two weeks, how often have you been bothered by the following problems?
a) Little interest or pleasure in doing things
b) Feeling down, depressed or hopeless

If you answer "more than half the days" to both questions, there's an 80% chance that you're suffering from some sort of depressive illness.

Based on what you've said, I'd strongly recommend speaking to your GP. Because you've suffered from depression before, you're at much higher risk of developing depression again. That feeling of dull listlessness can easily turn into complete despair if you don't do something about it.
>> No. 24048 Anonymous
14th January 2017
Saturday 2:48 pm
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Same here. There's something strangely comforting about someone who projects that easygoing happiness like Armstrong sitting down in a grotty pub at the end of the week, drowning in his pint and thinking it's just all so fucking pointless.
>> No. 24049 Anonymous
14th January 2017
Saturday 8:55 pm
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>>I wouldn't say I'm depressed- I've been truly depressed before, and this doesn't feel like that. I just feel listless, numb, bored.

There is no excuse for boredom, lad. There is always something to be interested in. Maybe your boredom is just a lack of enthusiasm.
>> No. 24050 Anonymous
14th January 2017
Saturday 10:53 pm
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I've been feeling down to the point where I have been actively battling suicidal ideation every waking hour this past week. I can't find the motivation to take any greater steps, just hanging on is all I can manage.
>> No. 24051 Anonymous
14th January 2017
Saturday 11:18 pm
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Call Samaritans at any time on 116 123. Calls are free on all networks. If you're worried that you might attempt suicide, go to A&E or call 999 for an ambulance.
>> No. 24052 Anonymous
14th January 2017
Saturday 11:44 pm
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Thanks but that sounds a lot like me calling Crimestoppers if I'm about to rob a bank.
>> No. 24053 Anonymous
15th January 2017
Sunday 12:00 am
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The fuck are you on about? These services are there to help you. Use them. 99% of people who feel suicidal later recover and were glad that there was intervention and assistance when they needed it.
>> No. 24054 Anonymous
15th January 2017
Sunday 12:07 am
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No, it's like calling a builder if the roof of your bank is about to collapse on top of you.
>> No. 24055 Anonymous
15th January 2017
Sunday 1:44 am
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You can't beat death.
But you can beat death in life.
>> No. 24158 Anonymous
5th February 2017
Sunday 9:25 pm
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I have the most amazing and supportive girlfriend, who has put up with so much shit from me due to me being a mentally ill fuck up. She'd do anything for me, and talks often of marriage and kids, and we're meant to be moving in together in a few months after 2 years of dating.

But I want to end it with her. I doubt I'll find someone who would sacrifice so much to be with me, who would support me through so much, but I just don't feel right in the relationship. I don't see kids and marriage in my future. I don't even see a future for myself, and reckon I'll end up topping myself in the next few years. I fear staying with her will be a future of mediocrity. I just want to fuck off to another country or something.
>> No. 24159 Anonymous
5th February 2017
Sunday 10:44 pm
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Was going to write a post blustering on about mediocrity, but then I realised that the problem is primarily that you don't see a future for yourself at all. Figure that out first, what are your values? What do you want to do with your life? Maybe a wife and kids would fit into that if you can build a clearer picture for yourself.
>> No. 24161 Anonymous
5th February 2017
Sunday 10:58 pm
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Have you ever expressed your lack of readiness for such commitment to her? It's hard to gather the context from your post but I found it hard not to interpret it as "I don't really want this but the woman is already making all the arrangements and I don't have much say."

If she's as understanding and supporting as you say then she shouldn't rush you into these things, but you didn't make it clear how much communication there has been. It would be harsh to break up with someone who's done a lot for you like that, but I can't recommend you get stuck into a tenancy agreement or anything even approaching marriage/kids until you've sorted your head out.
>> No. 24183 Anonymous
13th February 2017
Monday 12:20 am
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The desire to be wiped out completely off the face of the earth grows within me.
>> No. 24190 Anonymous
13th February 2017
Monday 11:13 pm
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My state of mind flipflops so wildly recently and I don't know why. I'd describe myself as hypersensitive.
Decided to swear off getting drunk for the foreseeable future, that just exacerbates things.

Also been thinking how people respond to personality disorders.
I've never been good with people, normal interactions take a lot of effort for me and it's difficult getting that across to people at all.
Doesn't help when people on /emo/ start complaining at people in similar situations to "man up" because some kid in africa lost his parents to anal rapist murderers. It's all relevant to people's own situations, you'd deny anyone in the UK the opportunity for grieving if you compared us to people in shittier bits of the planet.
>> No. 24194 Anonymous
14th February 2017
Tuesday 1:07 am
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>Doesn't help when people on /emo/ start complaining at people in similar situations to "man up" because some kid in africa lost his parents to anal rapist murderers. It's all relevant to people's own situations, you'd deny anyone in the UK the opportunity for grieving if you compared us to people in shittier bits of the planet.

Sounds like what you need is someone to give you a hug listen to you rant a bit and give you some reassuring words and send you on your way ready to face the world once more.
>> No. 24196 Anonymous
14th February 2017
Tuesday 12:25 pm
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>I've never been good with people, normal interactions take a lot of effort for me and it's difficult getting that across to people at all.

I'm the same, but you can get over that with a little bit of practice. Most people are a lot easier to deal with than you think. And you don't always have to think it's your fault when a social interaction becomes awkward.
>> No. 24249 Anonymous
19th February 2017
Sunday 11:42 pm
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I got upset over the treatment of possibly trolling, more likely horribly real and needing to vent nonenglishspeaking deathbedlad on this board, posted on /shed/ and was accused of being deathbedlad, as was someone else who questioned it after me. I got surprisingly upset about all of that and really hope there is some reason people think he was trolling for attention. I nearly came close to full-scale teary 'I am leaving gs forever' territory accompanied by a list of the marvels and memorable posts I have introduced to this place since 2010, but didn't.

Also, I'm feeling old, tired all the time, unworthy of my girlfriend, too dependent on drink, sick of being skint.
>> No. 24254 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 5:08 am
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What is my purpose?
>> No. 24255 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 5:41 am
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Depends on your personal views. Religons are all pretty easy, live a good life do what the high power tell you so it doesn't eat you bla bla bla...

If you go into phisophy it goes everywhere from
life has meaning and it is this!... ;
Life has meaning but you have to find it;
There is meaning but it is unknowable , but you can make your own and it has value;
To meaning is unknowable, but it's worth looking for one;
to don't bother looking because existance is a cruel joke and you'll never find one and any meaning you set yourself is just busy work;
There is no meaning to anything ever, every existing thing is born without reason, prolongs itself out of weakness and dies by chance.

Personally I have never been able to get behind a definitive meaning of it all. But there are several key moral principals that I would defend with my life if push came to shove.
>> No. 24256 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 5:45 am
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Mainly, turning glucose and oxygen into energy and CO2. Beyond that, you're making it up as you go along, just like the rest of us.
>> No. 24257 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 5:46 am
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Well that was a mess of spelling errors my apologies Modlads.
>> No. 24258 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 6:38 am
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You pass butter
>> No. 24259 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 7:03 am
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>> No. 24262 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 2:15 pm
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OP's picture looks like my Dad. I don't like my Dad. I call him David and he's a shit grandparent.

Despite all that, if he stopped being a histrionic child, I'd make up with him in a second.

I don't know about the rest of you, but when I was young I spent a great deal of time with my Grandparents. We would visit one set on a Saturday and the other on a Sunday or sometime stay over for the weekend at one or the others. This was something I always assumed was at the core of his personality; being family orientated, but he has only ever seen his own Grandchildren on a handful of occasions and I can't figure out why.

We don't get along because he is a hypochondriac and doesn't like being challenged on anything he says or does, but why would that stop him going to see my Sister's kids?

It doesn't scan and I can't stop dwelling on it. Maybe it was my own Grandparents who pushed to see us, but even then if you were raised and lived in that environment of close knit family why would you estrange yourself on purpose?
>> No. 24263 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 2:54 pm
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I call my dad "Dave", but I think that's just because I was an especially stupid child who got the words "dad" and "Dave" mixed up.

Sage for pointless posting.
>> No. 24264 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 2:54 pm
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Maybe they make him feel old and miss his own parents?
>> No. 24265 Anonymous
21st February 2017
Tuesday 3:04 pm
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His parents are still alive. He is only punishing himself at the end of the day, they already call my Mum's partner Papa. If it is as something as petty as that, lets just say it wouldn't be out of character if other situations were taken into consideration. This is family though, which I always thought he put on a pedestal.
>> No. 24293 Anonymous
24th February 2017
Friday 5:00 pm
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You know that thing lassies do where they flirt with you and say things which give you the impression of being interested, but then also just blatantly ignore your communication for hours/days on end?

I try not to waste my time on them when they do this, clearly bitch is just using you for the occasional compliments and attention when she feels like it. But why does it have to happen with ones that you proper fancied too. You sit there like a dog waiting for its owner to come back from work like "Ah man why won't she just message back."

Fuck women man. Fuck 'em all to hell.
>> No. 24301 Anonymous
24th February 2017
Friday 6:38 pm
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I think your problem is one of percived scacity and not moving forwards. You put up with their bullshit because you don't see yourself as having other options. Meet more women, then you'll feel that you no longer need to dwell on the ones you currently know stringing you along because there will be other options.
Some of those women will be decent people who treat you with dignity, and you can have much more rewarding rapport with, and the ones currently causing you grief will become less important to you and your happiness.
>> No. 24302 Anonymous
24th February 2017
Friday 6:41 pm
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I appreciate the sentiment but to be honest, I don't have a problem per-se. I just wanted to vent a bit about lasses airing me. I'm actually a bit of a manwhore with the old dating apps.

It's just frustrating when you think you've found a really nice one who might even have more potential than just a quick shag, but then she turns out to be one of the ones who never responds.
>> No. 24312 Anonymous
25th February 2017
Saturday 8:47 am
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I'm with you there. No matter how much life experience I have, and how many women I've been with, it's still painful to be convinced she's into you then suddenly realise she definitely isn't.
>> No. 24317 Anonymous
26th February 2017
Sunday 12:19 am
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What is a good reason to not kill yourself?
>> No. 24322 Anonymous
26th February 2017
Sunday 7:31 pm
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It might get better later, and even if it doesn't, you're going to die eventually anyway. The outcome is always the same in the end, you're just potentially missing out on the good parts. There's no rational reason to commit to such a decision.

It's like if someone offers you a lottery ticket for free. What have you got to gain by turning it down?
>> No. 24399 Anonymous
9th March 2017
Thursday 10:16 pm
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You know that thing where you're just completely blagging it through life, and somehow you're just getting away with it all? You know, you bullshit all day at work, you lie your way through awkward situations, you make things up as you go along and hope it works out.

Does it ever get on top of you just simply how much you're completely, absolutely fucking phoning it in at times, but somehow totally getting away with it? I have this crushing paranoia sometimes that I'll turn up to work or sit down for a pint and they'll just collectively go "Look. We know you're a fraud. We're on to you."

I've always supposed it's because everyone else is going through life in the exact same manner, but I don't know lads. Sometimes I just have one of those days where I get away completely clean with something that I really should have been called out on, and I can't help but sit there questioning it all.
>> No. 24400 Anonymous
9th March 2017
Thursday 10:25 pm
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I dunno. Give us an example?
>> No. 24402 Anonymous
9th March 2017
Thursday 10:52 pm
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Might want to reseach this lad. Might put you at ease to understand it better.

>> No. 24404 Anonymous
10th March 2017
Friday 6:40 am
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'Good old neon' by David Foster Wallace is a great short story on this theme.
>> No. 24555 Anonymous
19th March 2017
Sunday 5:46 am
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Just going to bump this thread. For the first time in almost a year I've had actual isolated time to myself. It hasn't gone well. I had a lot of alcohol and it resulted in lots of shouting, bruised knuckles and lots of tears. For the past almostyear I've been socialising a lot, traveling through different countries and all that, I think it distracted me. Turns out that if I'm left by myself I'm exactly the same as before I set out to do all that, If that makes sense. Left to my own devices I think I'm just done and it's a matter of time.

You can't change the things that have happened to you, and past a certain point you can't change how they affect you. More importantly, you just don't care and whatever happens, happens. I'm fucking off elsewhere soon and I'm probably going to die in the middle of nowhere, somewhere in the world. I am ok with this, I think.
>> No. 24792 Anonymous
19th April 2017
Wednesday 9:29 pm
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I have nothing to say yet want to be heard.
>> No. 24793 Anonymous
19th April 2017
Wednesday 9:58 pm
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Sounds like you were fine on your own devices until you started to drink.
>> No. 24794 Anonymous
20th April 2017
Thursday 3:40 am
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Christ lad. For some people that's a bit like saying "you were doing fine with all those sheep until you remembered you're a wolf". You can run half way around the world, you can reinvent yourself over and over again in new cities in new countries, you can fill your days and nights with wholesome activities and new friends and romances. You can do all that, but if right down at the honest basic sat in a dingy hotel room with my own company level you're a miserable, unhappy, slightly mad bastard then all of that is nothing but a great big psychic plaster just waiting to come peeling off.

I'm not even >>24555, btw, just a potentially kindred spirit in the void.
>> No. 24795 Anonymous
20th April 2017
Thursday 7:47 am
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>You can't change the things that have happened to you, and past a certain point you can't change how they affect you.

You can always change how you behave. Living a better life is just a series of simple choices. Take the drink or leave it, get some exercise or sit on your arse, share your feelings or bottle them up, wallow in self-pity or be grateful. If you're living in the past or worrying about the future, you're not giving your full attention to the choice you're making right now.

>> No. 24796 Anonymous
20th April 2017
Thursday 10:21 am
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Really? Because I think it's more like saying "You seemed to be fine until you introduced a large quantity of a chemical to your brain which lowers your inhibitions and leaves you feeling like shit physically and mentally for days afterwards".
There's some real pathological thinking you hear spouted every now and then about how alcohol brings out "the real you". No, it doesn't. Your inhibitions are just as much a part of you as the desires they hold you back from acting on. Who you are when you're completely bladdered is no more the "real" you than when you're communing with the machine elves.
Then, even when you've kicked the tangible hangover, it leaves you depressed. If he's recently gone out and had too much to drink and made a fool of himself then he's not going to be thinking clearly when he wrote that. Which is better than some sort of self-aggrandising bipolar bullshit about being a wolf among sheep. Remind yourself that you're not thinking clearly, until this happened you were doing ok, get some sunshine and back on the wagon.
>> No. 24797 Anonymous
20th April 2017
Thursday 5:49 pm
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Huh, I forgot about this thread but for the previous posters, >24555 was me. For what it's worth it's not alcohol that makes me feel that way though I understand why people think that, it really does just help me cope, I can get a good cry in and let some things out much easier (always by myself) then pass out easily too. If I don't drink and have sessions like that then I spiral more and it gets much worse, I fixate and don't sleep and oddly alcohol has kept me here at least. I'm aware that's not a good thing probably.

I think I'm doing a bit better since then, though. Trying to let go more, get outside more, read more. Even just walking and walking then falling asleep in a field somewhere is nice. I have had slightly more distractions as I'm back at home now though and less consistent social contact. I think being by myself just seems to work out better for everyone. Maybe I'll live in the woods or something. Oh, trying to live more in the "now" too, turns out there's a lot of peace to be had in chaos. Sage for rambling.
>> No. 24798 Anonymous
20th April 2017
Thursday 10:10 pm
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It is so liberating to be so brain-damaged that you forget about things that happened years ago, people you have met, things you did, etc. Sometimes I play along and act like I know what the fuck-off memory some of the cunts around me are talking about.
>> No. 24799 Anonymous
21st April 2017
Friday 4:53 pm
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You completely missed the point. It's not about "self-aggrandising" and it's not about the alcohol, it's about the process that led you up to drinking the alcohol in the first place.

Even if you want to take the utterly simplistic case of someone who's drinking too much, the "fix" (as if there could ever be such a thing) isn't simply to stop drinking alcohol. All that stopping drinking will do for that person is take them back to who they were before they started drinking, which is to say the exact self same person who started drinking in the first place with all of same problems and reasons that they had before. Basically you're back to square one except now your liver hurts and all your friends think you're a prick. Thus the cycle of misery and addiction.

Thanks for sharing your utterly sophomoric thought processes with us anyway, cupcake.
>> No. 24801 Anonymous
21st April 2017
Friday 9:19 pm
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If it's not about that, then why were you talking about wolf and sheep? Clearly he's functional when he's not drinking. It's also obvious that he was depressed post-binge, which is normal. I was just trying to reassure the guy that no, he's not really a psychopath or a bad person, that's the result of him drinking, whereas you seem to be doing the opposite and encouraging him to drink on top of that.

Despite his claim now that it's not the alcohol that does it, he's been doing better since he stopped. I think that speaks for itself. Now if you'll excuse me, a four-pack of tennants super in the offie is calling my name.
>> No. 24802 Anonymous
21st April 2017
Friday 10:21 pm
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Oh, uh..I didn't meant to imply I'd stopped. I haven't. I actually just got a litre of gin.
>> No. 24803 Anonymous
21st April 2017
Friday 10:27 pm
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Then I retract what I said in light of new information.
>> No. 24804 Anonymous
23rd April 2017
Sunday 10:19 pm
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Sometimes, I feel very happy, and sometimes I feel very, very down, irritable and just wishing that I would not wake up from my sleep forever. I think this is wearing down my friends and family because they see me as really happy and joking around with them one time, and just really closed off and pissed off at other times.

This isn't fair on them, and it just makes me feel shittier. Am I mental or is this the case with most people?
>> No. 24805 Anonymous
24th April 2017
Monday 10:36 am
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Cyclothymia. It's perfectly treatable.
>> No. 24892 Anonymous
4th May 2017
Thursday 9:43 pm
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Lately I have found myself experiencing a certain longing when I watch TV shows that involve best friends and how they do stuff together. Even the X-Files. The reason being that I used to be best friends with a girl I knew for over 10 years and we'd hang out so much we really grew into each other, kindred spirits I guess. You' know how when you know someone so well you can communicate without saying anything - just with a look like you have some hidden language.

Of course I wrecked it by developing feelings for her and then had to cut contact because I couldn't spend my life watching her go with someone else, standard 20-something stuff. I'll never be able to patch that up and wouldn't want to but I do find myself missing her even years later. I know I will meet someone else like that one day and I do make friends and girlfriends but it is rare to build that kind of connection with someone. It is like a part of my youth that has been lost.

I just felt like getting that off my chest. There is no solution other than to forget about this fairly mundane problem.
>> No. 24893 Anonymous
5th May 2017
Friday 1:05 am
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I was going to wish my ex happy birthday today (well, yesterday) on the f.book. We hardly talk now, but in the process I saw the chat log of our break up and I became bitter, resentful, in pain and close to tears and decided it was best not to talk to her in case I acted on that feeling.

I feel slightly guilty for not saying it, but really no one else cares or is hurt that I didn't.
>> No. 24894 Anonymous
5th May 2017
Friday 6:31 pm
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I had an amazing friendship with a girl who was genuinely one of the funniest people I know. We knew eachother for about 8 years, but fucked that up royally by becoming a turbulent couple for 2 of them.

For a long time it felt like a chunk of my identity was missing, because there was no other human being I felt understood me like her. All that confiding in eachother, learning about the world, making sense of experiences together.

What I've come to realise is that the joined-at-the-hip feeling is a bit of an illusion. It's true that relationships are important for growth, we are always free to change how we look at ourselves. In fact, the drive to do that (for better or worse) is what ends many relationships, I think.

There's still bitterness, but also some fond and important memories. What's more important is now, though, is I feel like I am the person with the best understanding of myself. There's no need for someone who can complete my thoughts or flatter my ego. I know what I am, what I can do, how I react to things. I've come to know myself a lot better since we broke up.

Sage for borderline New Age wank.
>> No. 24895 Anonymous
5th May 2017
Friday 6:38 pm
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This post reads like I'm drunk but I swear I'm just fatigued.
>> No. 24896 Anonymous
5th May 2017
Friday 8:02 pm
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I have a similar thing with Star Trek TNG, particularly the episodes where Data is trying to explore his potential humanity. There's something comforting about their somewhat utopian world when I'm feeling miserably depressed or zombified (thanks Mirtazapine).

Plus Patrick Stewart is a cracking actor and who doesn't like looking at Counselor Troi? Long as her mum doesn't bugger up the episode.
>> No. 24900 Anonymous
7th May 2017
Sunday 11:56 am
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If TNG is on telly and Troi's mum is in it I automatically switch off. She was fucking annoying
>> No. 24901 Anonymous
7th May 2017
Sunday 1:09 pm
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You made the right decision. There is zero point in trying to continue a friendship with your ex if it ended up in bitterness, no matter how much you try you will both involuntary hate one another.

Mr. Woof!

I can't say I ever minded her. The thing about Lwaxana is she feels like a real person and even reminds me of an auntie I have. I'd rather one of her episodes than one of the weird Troi episodes with her wooden acting, awkward eroticism and rubbish superpower.
>> No. 24902 Anonymous
7th May 2017
Sunday 3:26 pm
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Auntiefucker mark 2 imminent
>> No. 24903 Anonymous
7th May 2017
Sunday 4:58 pm
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> an auntie

>> No. 24904 Anonymous
7th May 2017
Sunday 5:54 pm
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Grammatically that is correct. An goes before a vowel.
>> No. 24905 Anonymous
7th May 2017
Sunday 11:07 pm
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I don't think that's what he meant.
>> No. 24917 Anonymous
17th May 2017
Wednesday 5:08 pm
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My cunt brain doesn't work.
>> No. 24918 Anonymous
19th May 2017
Friday 9:42 am
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I've become fundamentally crap at taking care of myself, in the most fundamentally basic ways.

I'm hungry right now and should do something about it. But I will put off doing anything about it, because I feel like it requires too much effort. Even though it is making me miserable, What is my problem? when did I become this apathetic? How do I stop being this crap at existing. I feel like sometimes some survival circit in my brain switched to self termination, and it powered down all aspirations and drive.
>> No. 24919 Anonymous
19th May 2017
Friday 10:52 am
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Could be a medical reason for it. Go to your GP.
>> No. 24920 Anonymous
19th May 2017
Friday 12:10 pm
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I'd just like to say my cunt brain is doing alright at the minute.
>> No. 24921 Anonymous
19th May 2017
Friday 12:11 pm
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Good to know. Keep us posted.
>> No. 24923 Anonymous
20th May 2017
Saturday 1:04 am
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Self-neglect and low motivation are big warning signs for depression. Get yourself to the GP.
>> No. 24924 Anonymous
20th May 2017
Saturday 9:27 pm
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And tell him what? The whole thing is drawn out.
>> No. 24925 Anonymous
21st May 2017
Sunday 1:57 pm
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The doctor tried to tell me I was depressed for these reasons, so I had to remind him that not only am I already on an antidepressant for anxiety, I suffer from chronic back and joint pain and told him if he gave me better painkillers I'd shower more than was absolutely necessary to keep my wife from leaving me.

I shaved recently for the first time in about a year and had to use scissors on it first, because I was going to a wedding. Up until that point I couldn't be arsed because it really hurt my arm and wrist and my wife liked it... for a bit. She started offering to shave it for me, but I was too proud, but eventually conceded the moustache because she threatened to stop having sex with me so she was trimming it with a beard trimmer every time it got "scratchy".

It's all about perspective, both of those things apply to me but I'm pretty OK mentally.
>> No. 24926 Anonymous
21st May 2017
Sunday 6:31 pm
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Cognitive Behavoural Therapy can be really useful for chronic pain. It won't make the pain better, but it can make it easier to live with. Have you ever been referred to a pain clinic or the Expert Patients Programme?
>> No. 24927 Anonymous
21st May 2017
Sunday 10:15 pm
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Yeah, the Pain Clinic are fucking heroes. They gave me my first TENS machine and put me on pre-gabalin (which is cracking stuff).

The nurses have good chat and tolerance for swearing, first time I went they gave me a form with pictures of the body and told me to highlight were it hurt. I highlighted the whole thing and handed it back to him and he was just like "...fair enough. You want to sit in my desk chair, these seat are shit?" I sat in the chair.
>> No. 25026 Anonymous
19th June 2017
Monday 2:34 am
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I care more about the people I'm employed to look after than myself. Much more. They are fantastic, and I have no idea why I'm still here.
>> No. 25030 Anonymous
30th June 2017
Friday 7:53 pm
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I feel as though my time with .gs may be drawing to a close, and it's making me sad.

I've been frequenting this place from what feels like (because it probably has been) my entire adult life. It's been my "thing" that I keep to myself and don't need to tell anyone about, a nice morning scroll with a cuppa and a cig. But it's just not really as cathartic or relaxing as it used to be, and it makes me feel rather melancholic. Either the demographic has changed, or my tastes have changed, but the discussion here isn't what it once was.

I don't mean this post as one of those ridiculous attention seeking farewell post, I suppose I'm just feeling rather sentimental about drifting away from something that has actually been a pretty big part of my life. I don't like change. Growing old is scary.

All the best anyway lads.
>> No. 25031 Anonymous
30th June 2017
Friday 9:40 pm
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>drifting away from something that has actually been a pretty big part of my life.
Now that's depressing.
>> No. 25032 Anonymous
30th June 2017
Friday 9:50 pm
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Bugger off edgelord.
>> No. 25033 Anonymous
2nd July 2017
Sunday 12:18 am
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I really hate summer. Makes me very depressed.

I wish I could die every year and be reborn anew.
>> No. 25075 Anonymous
3rd July 2017
Monday 8:37 pm
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See you in a couple of years.
>> No. 25076 Anonymous
3rd July 2017
Monday 9:10 pm
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Sometimes, when I'm squeezing out the last few squirts of a piss, a little nugget of shit pops out and nestles between my arse cheeks.

I'm not sure what distresses me most. The fact I can't really feel that nugget of shit is there first, the fact that it's quite awkward if it happens at a standing urinal, the fact my arse is apparently loose enough that a gentle squeeze forces it out, or the fact that I have that one solitary nugget lurking around even when I've had a massive dump just a few hours prior.
>> No. 25077 Anonymous
3rd July 2017
Monday 9:47 pm
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Eat more fibre and start doing pelvic floor exercises. Yes, men do have a pelvic floor.
>> No. 25078 Anonymous
3rd July 2017
Monday 9:59 pm
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I know what you mean.

We peaked with Are Moaty. These days I'm visiting more out of habit than out of expectation I'll find something likely to cause mirth. The enthusiasm has gone. There's a small band of people determined to suck the fun out of everything and reduce most threads to pointless bickering, even when they're agreeing with each other. I know that's always been there but in the past it's generally been drowned out whereas nowadays we can go an entire weekend with only a dozen or so posts, none of them in the actual weekend thread.

Sage for meta.
>> No. 25079 Anonymous
4th July 2017
Tuesday 5:55 pm
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I think this is just the feeling of loving Britfa, but not being in love with Britfa.
>> No. 25080 Anonymous
4th July 2017
Tuesday 6:13 pm
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Maybe we should try a date-night, have a think about how we might spice things up in the bedroom too.
>> No. 25081 Anonymous
4th July 2017
Tuesday 8:24 pm
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I've bought a couple of magazines. Maybe we can try this underwear? I don't know.
>> No. 25082 Anonymous
4th July 2017
Tuesday 9:38 pm
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How do you feel about getting your sister involved?
>> No. 25083 Anonymous
4th July 2017
Tuesday 10:44 pm
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I don't have a sister but I've got an aunt.
>> No. 25084 Anonymous
4th July 2017
Tuesday 10:58 pm
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Does she like her ale?
>> No. 25085 Anonymous
6th July 2017
Thursday 2:08 pm
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Does anyone know if there's a kind of careers/life advice service available for adults. In the past year or so my mind has got so cloudy and I struggle conceptualise things properly and as I result I feel a bit stuck. I have lots of ideas of things I want/wish to do but I can't quite get it together or explain it.

I always feel so overwhelmed at the moment but I don't really have anything to feel overwhelmed at (that I can think of). I also feel I've lost alot of my abilities - hence why this post is probably full of grammatical errors.

I'm only (or already) 26 and I feel very stuck. Just feel like I need to have a deep and constructive conversation with someone lads.
>> No. 25086 Anonymous
6th July 2017
Thursday 2:43 pm
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I'm just popping in to say that yes, life coaches are a thing, but someone else may have more specific advice like which ones are scams.
>> No. 25087 Anonymous
6th July 2017
Thursday 3:12 pm
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Yeah I had a look into life coaches in the area but they seemed like scams, or at least a waste of money.
>> No. 25088 Anonymous
6th July 2017
Thursday 5:32 pm
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I've been feeling in a similar funk lately but although I always say this here writing it out (my life goals) really helped put things back into order last night. I think the only person who can really sort your life out is you.

Open notepad and write out short, medium and long term goals which consider the person you want to be and the life you want to have. No need to write a crazy timetable but think about the kind of person you are and what would make you happy.
>> No. 25089 Anonymous
6th July 2017
Thursday 6:41 pm
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All I've done recently it try to plot out where I'd be headed on my current path, try thinking about that a bit.

In my case I've decided to go back to uni and study something I enjoy (and that is coincidentally fairly useful to have a degree in). I have doubts even now, with the academic year creeping up on me, but it helps to look at what I could be doing instead.
I currently work for minimum wage in a fast food restaurant, and having little meaningful prior experience I'm unlikely to have any other opportunities easily available to me unless I work for them.
Being over 21 and a responsible adult I had the sad realisation that aside from maybe having kids eventually (unlikely since I'm chronically single) that I'm just going to be working from now until, well, longer than I can really conceptualise.
So uni it is, in the hopes of getting an actual career. I don't fancy being a fast food manager when reaching a salaried role would probably take as long as doing a degree.
>> No. 25090 Anonymous
6th July 2017
Thursday 9:01 pm
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I have used apps called Talkspace and Coach.Me. If you spend a moment searching for the right person, they can be excellent. Both are paid subscriptions but have been really worth it to me.
>> No. 25091 Anonymous
8th July 2017
Saturday 10:02 pm
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Dating is shit. Socialising is shit. I keep trying but nobody seems to follow it up when I initiate things. Feels lonely.
>> No. 25092 Anonymous
8th July 2017
Saturday 10:15 pm
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I'm in a similar situation too. Hence the Saturday night .gs. Solidarity.

I think I felt fulfilled last week. I felt like I was developing new friendships, I felt like I had opportunities with girls. But now everyone seems to have abandoned me and now doesn't seem interested in giving me any time.

I went on a date last night which a girl who I thought I had a good chance with, but like most of my dates, it ended with nothing more than a hug. There's either something about me IRL which makes me romantically unappealing or I'm misreading signs and should be going for a kiss anyway. I remember after one date a girl said "you're supposed to kiss me" after I hugged her goodnight so I really don't know how these things work.
>> No. 25105 Anonymous
9th July 2017
Sunday 12:14 pm
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I hear you
>> No. 25106 Anonymous
9th July 2017
Sunday 12:34 pm
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Why don't you just meet-up and rub dicks together?
>> No. 25107 Anonymous
9th July 2017
Sunday 12:58 pm
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Just go for the kiss. It's better to be rebuffed than wonder "what if?". A faint heart never won a fair maid and all that.

Don't lunge at a stranger on the bus, obviously. That's a sex crime.
>> No. 25111 Anonymous
9th July 2017
Sunday 9:28 pm
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Definitely always go for the kiss, unless she clearly isn't into you at all. If it's a date, always with the kiss.
>> No. 25147 Anonymous
19th July 2017
Wednesday 9:58 pm
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I'm a 28 year old 'NEET', overweight and lead a very inactive lifesytle. I barely engage in my interests outside of playing games on the computer. It wouldn't take a great deal of effort to change this but I lack the meaning and enthusiasm to do so at the moment.
Is it unrealistic for me to connect with another person online with the view of forming an offline relationship? I don't think I'd mind helping someone else out of a hole similar to mine, mutual support, but I can barely think anyone would do it for me seeing as I do so little for myself. How can I possibly say all this without selling myself short - "If you're looking for a project, I'm your man"?

It reminds me of tha Guardians of the Galaxy trailer; "You've just got to find somebody as pathetic as you are". Well, where and how can I find her? Wouldn't a relationship borne of this end in failure, anyway?
>> No. 25148 Anonymous
19th July 2017
Wednesday 10:49 pm
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First of all, you're going to need to develop some outside interests that don't involve sitting in front of the PC 13 hours a day. Second, you need to start taking some responsibility for yourself; you're not a 'NEET' - you're unemployed. You're not a 'project' - by your own definition you're not presenting an attractive prospect to a potential partner so, unless they're equally desperate, why the hell should anyone else do the same for you? You're not going to like this answer, maybe because you think it's a generic, 'pull your socks up' Dad-like argument but stop fucking moping, get a job, make some friends, lose some bloody weight and do something for yourself instead of wallowing in self-pity. No ones going to do it for you, mate. Once you get that in place, you'll find meeting someone a piss of piece.
>> No. 25149 Anonymous
19th July 2017
Wednesday 10:57 pm
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I hear you, man.
>> No. 25151 Anonymous
19th July 2017
Wednesday 11:15 pm
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>If you're looking for a project, I'm your man"?

For you to be the project of a woman you have to have some sort of halo effect that overrides your obvious failings. You know like you are very handsome and has a 60k estate car but you also want to systematically eradicate the Jewish people sort of thing. I don't think that is your option if you are the kind of decent mild mannered NEET I imagine you to be, unless you can play yourself off as some sort of brilliant soulful poet or writer who cares too much about your art to sell out and get a job.

>Is it unrealistic for me to connect with another person online with the view of forming an offline relationship?
I met my GF through an online dating site, apart from the fact that I met her I would say it is a completely awful experience that I wouldn't recommend to anyone.

The only way you are going to meet new people is by finding ways to interact with new people. If playing games is a closed system where you don't meet or talk to anyone new then you don't stand a chance without some form of change. Which is something you already know but I like to think hearing that from someone else helps.
>> No. 25153 Anonymous
20th July 2017
Thursday 1:55 am
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Nevermind the two lads above me mate. Get on Plenty Of Fish with your most flattering selfies, try to sell yourself as if you at least have SOME redeeming factors, and you can have a slightly overweight mental perma-NEET slag like my ex in only a few weeks. It helps if you have the ability to cater to crazy daddy-issue BDSM fetishes too.

I remember it quite fondly; we were both unemployed, whittling our overdrafts away on Amber Leaf and Space Raiders, reliant on overly generous parents who didn't mind us spending all day watching Doctor Who and shagging. Difference is I eventually got my act together, whereas it turned out she was likely destined to be one of those lost cause lifetime doleys.

Being unemployed and useless at life is actually an advantage on dating sites. There's a vast underclass of 18 to 20-something chubby lasses who still live between their divorcee parents and the job centre ripe for the taking if you have a similar schedule of fuck all to do with your time. It's a numbers game and the more time you have to spend on it, the better off you are.

Since I got a decent job, sorted my life out, and have things to actually do with my time, I find it much harder to get a shag than I used to. Not only have my standards increased substantially since my hesitant, shaky early 20s, but carrying on the conversation and flirtation needed to bag a Tinder slag is something I can't find time to commit to these days. Especially with my damn girlfriend taking up so much of my fucking time. It's going to be even worse when she moves in with me.
>> No. 25154 Anonymous
20th July 2017
Thursday 1:58 am
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This lad knows the score.
>> No. 25155 Anonymous
20th July 2017
Thursday 6:30 am
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This. However, if you're going to take selfies take them outside.

Women love pictures of you actually doing something. Go on a ramble, walk a dog, go somewhere scenic.
>> No. 25156 Anonymous
20th July 2017
Thursday 3:18 pm
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Wow, I'm glad I'm just in a shallow pool of melancholy and not the actively manic and frequently delusional head space I was at a month ago, otherwise I might have done something properly mental (like expecting IAPT to have helped me).
>> No. 25157 Anonymous
21st July 2017
Friday 2:50 am
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Things get worse. They don't get better.
>> No. 25158 Anonymous
21st July 2017
Friday 8:28 am
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Not thatlad but I find POF to be nigh on impossible to use. It's a cluster fuck of horrible design and misleading links.
>> No. 25159 Anonymous
21st July 2017
Friday 12:04 pm
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It's the online equivalent of a shitty provincial nightclub. Nobody really wants to be there, the ambience is awful, but you're pretty much guaranteed to get your hole. If you want the online equivalent of a shitty provincial indie club, try OKCupid - there's a slightly better class of woman, but don't they just know it.
>> No. 25160 Anonymous
21st July 2017
Friday 3:41 pm
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That analysis is pretty spot on and I dont like it.
>> No. 25161 Anonymous
21st July 2017
Friday 7:27 pm
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Been on OKC for many years but I'm an ugly, slightly overweight (but not obese) autist with crippling social anxiety and hence completely unable to get a conversation going with anyone. I barely ever get replies. I hoped it would take the biggest hurdle for me out of the whole dating thing, which is telling if someone is interested in you, but all it seems to have done is confirm that no-one is actually interested.

Sage for the wrong thread to be saying this in.
>> No. 25162 Anonymous
21st July 2017
Friday 7:45 pm
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Plenty of Fish is full of single mothers looking for a meal ticket. If you can tolerate that sort of thing then you could end up, like the bloke on Naked Attraction last night, punching well above your weight.

It's also why the place is rife with paedos.
>> No. 25163 Anonymous
21st July 2017
Friday 8:28 pm
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Gold diggers and carpet-baggers? Sounds like Thailand.
>> No. 25164 Anonymous
21st July 2017
Friday 11:39 pm
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Screenshot 2017-07-21 at 23.36.34.png

It's very much like that, except instead of jetting off to a tropical paradise, you're getting a Megabus to Grimsby.
>> No. 25177 Anonymous
25th July 2017
Tuesday 7:24 pm
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After 5 years of not smoking, I have gone back to smoking because I feel less suicidal and depressed. Does that make any sense? I started a couple of weeks back and I have just been okayish and sometimes even happy. I socialise better. I'm not moody and cutting everyone off. I switched to vaping, and although it was weird, I am doing just fine.

Smoking is good.
>> No. 25179 Anonymous
25th July 2017
Tuesday 9:14 pm
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> Does that make any sense?

Nicotine induces a massive dopaminergic response, which is why it's so bloody addictive. Some evidence suggests that it might be an effective antidepressant.
>> No. 25181 Anonymous
27th July 2017
Thursday 3:59 am
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I'm going to spend two weeks in the middle of nowhere in Europe, with no alcohol, drugs or cigarettes. I feel like I might die, but if that's how it goes, it goes.
>> No. 25182 Anonymous
27th July 2017
Thursday 4:02 am
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>it goes, it goes.

>> No. 25183 Anonymous
27th July 2017
Thursday 4:50 am
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Ha damn it, I've been listening to them a lot too. if you couldn't tell from /beat/

Worst case scenario I get fucked out of my mind in the middle of a forest somewhere.g
>> No. 25190 Anonymous
1st August 2017
Tuesday 1:33 pm
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Why does my worldview seem so right while other peoples so wrong? How does it feel right, deep down, as if principle?

Recently while talking with a friend, for the first time in my life I looked at him and thought "there might actually be whatever it is that I am inside there, too".
>> No. 25191 Anonymous
1st August 2017
Tuesday 2:55 pm
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>> No. 25192 Anonymous
3rd August 2017
Thursday 3:50 am
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Why can't I just be a little bit drunk all the time? I know this is like the Inebriati but honestly everything is so much better with the right amount of drink. I'm switched on. I'm actually motivated to do things. I get tipsy and I read, I clean, I get exercise. What's bad about that?
>> No. 25193 Anonymous
3rd August 2017
Thursday 4:45 am
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It worked very well for Christopher Hitchens, right up to the point where he developed esophageal cancer.
>> No. 25195 Anonymous
3rd August 2017
Thursday 4:55 am
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..So..Is it worth it or..?
>> No. 25211 Anonymous
5th August 2017
Saturday 2:43 am
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I tried being drunk constantly before, managed several months before I felt like I probably shouldn't be, can't say it actually affected me negatively whilst I was drunk, but everything slipped into the usual mediocrity of life again just with more logistical problems because I had to think about how to source 20+ units of alcohol per day whilst going about my daily life.

If you do do it, be careful about sobering up, it is the withdrawal that fucks you, you can't just go dry you have to ween yourself down.
>> No. 25214 Anonymous
5th August 2017
Saturday 2:50 pm
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"Sometimes, when I'm squeezing out the last few squirts of a piss, a little nugget of shit pops out and nestles between my arse cheeks. "

This happens to me too. It's a pain when my shit is runny.
>> No. 25218 Anonymous
5th August 2017
Saturday 9:08 pm
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This. There's a term I now forget for how your brain adjusts to having whatever chemicals you're putting into it (neurochemical equilibrium? Something like that); after a while you're basically back to "normal", you just have an addiction to go with it, and an expensive and damaging one at that.

Speaking from experience, being a drunk becomes an absolute nightmare, and now I'm fucked because I went "cold turkey" too many times and experience kindling really badly, which is fucking horrible. I am stuck with this for life. This means that a casual drink with the lads/my family has to be carefully balanced such that I know I'll be safely alone the next day so that I can deal with the horrors of rattling, nauseous withdrawal on my own.

Don't get into drinking every day lads, it's a deeply depressing road and no good will ever come of it. If I could go back in time I'd implore my younger self never to take up drinking alone, it's hard to overstate just how profoundly negative an impact it's had on my life.
>> No. 25221 Anonymous
8th August 2017
Tuesday 1:06 am
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>safely alone the next day so that I can deal with the horrors of rattling, nauseous withdrawal on my own.

Hair of the dog first thing in the morning, before your body has even realised it wants to be nauseous. Double vodka before you even think about your cornflakes. I used to heave so hard I'd expell all my stomach acid, and my stomach blead, when I accepted I needed to drink the next day after a night out to pace out the withdrawal I was able to recover with dignity.
>> No. 25222 Anonymous
8th August 2017
Tuesday 5:30 am
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Legitimately debating never sobering up. Just the right amount of booze seems to quiet my mind and make everything much easier. This is probably bad but I'm also wondering if it'll lead to a short life or what. Then is it worth the trade off? It might well be.
>> No. 25223 Anonymous
8th August 2017
Tuesday 4:26 pm
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To stay moderately drunk all day requires around 40 units of alcohol per day, and will rapidly need far more than that as your tolerance goes up. Once you start being moderately drunk all day you'll then need to drink more and more to get to sleep at night to boot.

The critical tipping point for people who like to drink is the magical 24 units per day, which is exactly (more or less) what your body can process and kick out within a 24 hour period. After this you will always have alcohol in your system whether you can feel it or not.

This means you will always have fucked up insulin levels, you will not absorb vitamin K or B vitamins - this will lead to korsakoff syndrome and potentially an esophageal hemorrhage (aka: going out like Charles Kennedy, drowning in your own blood, wide eyed and half understanding in the grimy drunken dawn of another sweaty night).

Your body will no be able to handle protein synthesis correctly while also having massively reduced lypolisis thanks to your out of whack insulin levels. This will, in a short time, give you the saggy worn out look of all men who hit too many bottles but miss too many meals; flabby ill-fitting skin and atrophied musculature.

Your liver will start giving you serious gip within about five years and will kill you within ten.

Go get hooked on benzos or phenibutt, or picamilon or whatever else isn't a complete and utter fucking toxin.

Regards, a rotting and moribund alcoholic.
>> No. 25224 Anonymous
8th August 2017
Tuesday 4:34 pm
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>24 units per day
Huh, I had almost exactly that last night.
I think I'll steer clear tonight.
>> No. 25227 Anonymous
11th August 2017
Friday 1:45 pm
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>The critical tipping point for people who like to drink is the magical 24 units per day, which is exactly (more or less) what your body can process and kick out within a 24 hour period. After this you will always have alcohol in your system whether you can feel it or not.

This is interesting information, thank you. Is it a constant for everyone, or dependent on body size/shape?

Is there an approximately scientific way (by which I mean something you can do yourself without a doctor) to measure a) how much alcohol is in your bloodstream right now and b) how quickly (or not) your body is processing it?
>> No. 25228 Anonymous
11th August 2017
Friday 5:18 pm
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Boots sells single and reusable breathalysers. To see how fast it's being processed I suppose you'd have to take an average over time.
>> No. 25229 Anonymous
11th August 2017
Friday 6:01 pm
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To the best of my knowledge, while how resistant you are the effects of alcohol will be affected by body shape, size, weight, and body fat percentage, the rate at which you clear alcohol from your system is pretty much fixed.

People who have already fucked their liver and/or kidneys will most likely metabolize and excrete it at a slower rate than people with a pristine set of organs.
>> No. 25271 Anonymous
14th August 2017
Monday 5:51 pm
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I feel like Venlafaxine might have been made by the devil himself, or at least had its creation funded by the bastard.

As soon as I went up from 75mg/day to 112.5mg/day I started feeling like I was on cheap speed all day every day. If you haven't ever taken cheap speed on a daily basis, let me describe what it feels like: by the second week or so you no longer feel any semblance of "high", no matter how much of the bastard stuff you take - all you feel is a sort of all-encompassing fatigue brought on from bad sleep quality and never feeling like eating at all mixed with a continuously "wired but tired" piano wire anxiety . All of your muscles ache, all the time, and you get out of breath trying to go up a flight of stairs.

On top of all this it also managed to turn the act of orgasm in a sort of pleasureless wet dick-fart. So, yeah, thanks for that improved quality of life there Beelzebub. I'm sure that having the possibility of pleasureless orgasms for the rest of my miserable life hanging over me the limp pink sword of Damocles is really going to help fend off depression.

And to really ice the cake I have to go back to my psychiatrist and explain that I've stopped taking the capsules of the cursed one while trying to put out of my mind the twisted idea that I might as well be investing my 250 snaps a month into heroin for all the good that the officially approved route to mental is doing for me.
>> No. 25272 Anonymous
14th August 2017
Monday 6:43 pm
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Psychopharmaceutical dose-response curves are massively non-linear. A drug can do completely different things at different doses. Any decent psychiatrist should understand this.

>> No. 25273 Anonymous
14th August 2017
Monday 6:46 pm
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TLP is not an authority on anything.
>> No. 25274 Anonymous
14th August 2017
Monday 7:48 pm
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Why doesn't he post his stuck-up ramblings anymore?
>> No. 25275 Anonymous
14th August 2017
Monday 8:21 pm
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I've seen people claim it's because he got doxxed and his employers weren't happy but others responding to that saying his identity was never hidden, so beyond vague rumours I don't know.
>> No. 25280 Anonymous
15th August 2017
Tuesday 3:51 pm
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I haven't had alcohol in almost a week. I'm surrounded by mountains and forest. Perhaps the best way to be rid of something is to go where it isn't.
>> No. 25289 Anonymous
17th August 2017
Thursday 12:35 pm
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I feel like my moral code has become so distant from modern societies that I feel like John Savage in Brave New World seeing fault in everything.

I feel like I can't even explain what is wrong to people anymore the paradigms we operate by are too different that it is impossible to get people to step into my world view, and my behavior is easily interpreted as being that of an arsehole, because of my lack of inclination to indulge in the general worldview.

Moral panic and knee jerk reactions do my head in. I feel like the majority of people have no moral consistency, just proclaiming whatever virtue serves their current point and switching to the opposite virtue the next time it serves (not that they seem even aware they are doing it). And everywhere I go I see fallacies, short term solutions and wishful thinking triumph over reason, getting to the root of problems and facts. In particular I think it is a problem with handling loss, I feel like most people aren't emotionally equipped to deal with loss or failure constructively, maybe 'keep calm and carry on' and stoicism are all myths and I'm a cold hearted freak for being able to dust myself off, accept what happened, adjust accordingly, and keep going, but I think it is a virtue.

I see the patterns of history repeating but feel like societies mentality is primed in a way that doesn't see it, it's like the narrative and momentum of history is unstoppable and will only respond to events, and then in the most heavy handed way in the other direction.
And when others call upon history repeating it feels frequently like a cargo cult version of history repeating. To use an example We all know that Nazis are evil, but I feel like people don't understand why Nazis are evil, they don't point to the actions of the Nazis and say, 'these actions are evil, that's why the Nazis are evil. It is boiled down to simply ' Nazis are evil'. Because people don't go to the root, nothing is learned, the mentality and actions that made Nazis bad can be repeated as long as you call it something else. And it is impossible to convince someone not to be a Nazi because the reasons why Nazis are bad is forgotten.

To use an even simpler example; If you think the word 'manspaining' isn't sexist you need to think about what sexism really means and why it is bad, and if you feel the need to use a recent definition of sexism that deliberately excuses that, you have to ask why that definition was changed,who by, and if that is the case, does that still make gender specific critical words okay? Everybody is capable of discrimination and being an arsehole, even victims of it.

It's not that I'm some teenage radical, I'm for the most part pragmatic, and I support in principal the kind of society we have. I just wish for the most part critical thinking was used more in daily lives and people though more about and defined what they believed philosophically, and beyond their needs. I think our lives would be better if we all learned to find a constructive collective consciousness and if public debate was driven by ideas and future implications, rather than event responsive and emotional rhetoric.
>> No. 25290 Anonymous
17th August 2017
Thursday 1:04 pm
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I have felt like this for a while also, but it is hard to put into words to people. Because of it though I've mostly become a recluse with few friends. I even recently had one of those friends tell me that they just don't understand me. Perhaps some people too get confused if you always say what you mean, because they're so used to reading inbetween the lines with others. Anyway I've chosen to fuck off elsewhere in the world and try to get lost. It is quite nice.
>> No. 25291 Anonymous
17th August 2017
Thursday 2:04 pm
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We don't sound too different, If you are so inclined, maybe you and I could swap throwaway email addresses and attempt to form a friendship based on a like-mindedness. The company I keep is formed too much by conveyance and I'd hate to not at least attempt to form a friendship with a person who at least seems to have some understanding of me.
>> No. 25293 Anonymous
17th August 2017
Thursday 6:23 pm
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I'm a third person who has this sort of view of the world, but to be honest I've never seen much fun to be had from a friendship with someone like myself.
>> No. 25294 Anonymous
17th August 2017
Thursday 6:29 pm
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I'm sort of with you there, but also I've tried to always embrace new experiences/situations/people when the opportunity is shown. >>25290 I don't have time right now to setup a throwaway, if you do though I'll send an email your way when I have more time.
>> No. 25295 Anonymous
17th August 2017
Thursday 6:42 pm
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Unless you want to start a Discord server or something.
>> No. 25296 Anonymous
17th August 2017
Thursday 6:49 pm
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I'm starting to wonder the effect of consuming others creation rather than generating my own. All I'm doing is laying myself as the foundation for their worldview. If I don't want that is it fair to expect others to uphold mine?
>> No. 25298 Anonymous
17th August 2017
Thursday 8:37 pm
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I feel a bit like this too. Politically especially, I feel a bit alienated from current lefty discourse. All very authoritarian and politically correct and not very fun.
>> No. 25299 Anonymous
17th August 2017
Thursday 10:31 pm
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Your politics are intersectional or they are bullshit.
>> No. 25300 Anonymous
17th August 2017
Thursday 10:54 pm
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When I am confronted by the major political questions of the day, I stop to ask myself, "what solution would be most fun?"
>> No. 25301 Anonymous
17th August 2017
Thursday 11:27 pm
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I wasn't even trying to be aggressive and all I get is someone assuming I'm against intersectional analysis of politics. I can't figure out if this is bait or not, and that's bad.

As far as fun goes, I'm not saying politics is trivial I just mean that (essentially) shouting at people might feel justified and right due to how you perceive your cause but that doesn't make it easy to engage in left politics a lot of the time. Feels a little oppressive, which is why I still hang about on chan boards because you'll at least have politically incorrect but left-oriented individuals that'll brave the pits to try and broaden their horizons. That's just my observations on t'internet. My complaints probably mostly stem from internet interactions.
>> No. 25302 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 11:12 am
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Fortunately though people who are actually trying to change things don't have the time or patience to indulge your concern trolling.

If you feel 'oppressed' by 'lefty discourse', then you're probably quite privileged to begin with. You can either recognise that, or look elsewhere.
>> No. 25303 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 11:42 am
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There's an awful lot of 'Bash the fash' stuff going on over on facebook with people advocating non-violent resistance being labelled Nazi-sympathisers and subsequently ejected from the echo chambers.
It's not so much that I mind people punching white supremacists as I mind them posting on facebook about it.
The people posting pro-Trump stuff bother me too but for different reasons.
>> No. 25304 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 12:28 pm
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I can highly recommend the book Days of Rage. It's a history of violent left-wing extremism in the US in the 60s and 70s. It's really quite extraordinary - white leftist radicals got away with an unbelievable range of violence, from bombings to kidnappings. It's almost completely forgotten now, but the establishment was bizarrely tolerant of left-wing violence.

>> No. 25305 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 12:55 pm
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I feel like this reviewer is a little biased.
>Davis, if you don’t know, is so dedicated to communism that she literally got her Ph.D. behind the Iron Curtain. From a moral perspective, that’s a little like somebody getting a Ph.D. in old South Africa specifically because they dig apartheid.
>> No. 25306 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 1:57 pm
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>but the establishment was bizarrely tolerant of left-wing violence

Bullshit, lad, utter BS.

>According to attorney Brian Glick in his book War at Home, the FBI used four main methods during COINTELPRO:

>Infiltration: Agents and informers did not merely spy on political activists. Their main purpose was to discredit and disrupt. Their very presence served to undermine trust and scare off potential supporters. The FBI and police exploited this fear to smear genuine activists as agents.
>Psychological warfare: The FBI and police used myriad "dirty tricks" to undermine progressive movements. They planted false media stories and published bogus leaflets and other publications in the name of targeted groups. They forged correspondence, sent anonymous letters, and made anonymous telephone calls. They spread misinformation about meetings and events, set up pseudo movement groups run by government agents, and manipulated or strong-armed parents, employers, landlords, school officials and others to cause trouble for activists. They used bad-jacketing to create suspicion about targeted activists, sometimes with lethal consequences.
>Harassment via the legal system: The FBI and police abused the legal system to harass dissidents and make them appear to be criminals. Officers of the law gave perjured testimony and presented fabricated evidence as a pretext for false arrests and wrongful imprisonment. They discriminatorily enforced tax laws and other government regulations and used conspicuous surveillance, "investigative" interviews, and grand jury subpoenas in an effort to intimidate activists and silence their supporters.
>Illegal force: The FBI conspired with local police departments to threaten dissidents; to conduct illegal break-ins in order to search dissident homes; and to commit vandalism, assaults, beatings and assassinations. The object was to frighten or eliminate dissidents and disrupt their movements.

The Establishment murdered leading members of the Black resistance and Labour movements, too. If you don't know about the US's brutal internal war against its Left, I doubt you've even read the book you're promoting.
>> No. 25307 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 2:22 pm
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Bill Ayers participated in the bombings of the New York City Police Department headquarters, the United States Capitol building and the Pentagon. Precisely because of COINTELPRO, all charges against him were dropped. He served no prison time and went on to become a tenured professor at the University of Illinois. His accomplice Bernadette Dohrn got three years probation; Cathlyn Wikerson served eleven months in prison.

They planted bombs in federal government buildings, but they got off practically scot-free. They would have faced substantially harsher punishment if they had been caught with a quarter of hash. The book describes numerous other radical leftists who avoided any serious punishment for what we would now define as acts of terrorism. If that doesn't count as "bizarrely tolerant", I'm not sure what does.


The book details the remarkably different treatment of black and white radicals; white radicals tended to end up with careers in law and academia, while black radicals tended to end up dead.
>> No. 25309 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 8:48 pm
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I like it. Hopefully this will cause a split and all those Hummus buying bastards can fuck off to their ivory towers and stop calling themselves leftists.

Maybe sometime down the line, we can have a proper class war.
>> No. 25310 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 9:52 pm
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This feels uncomfortably like /pol/ has leaked into /emo/ but I will admit that the current political climate is leaving me feeling quite uncomfortable too, largely because I feel that both apparent "sides" are a complete shower of idiots.
>> No. 25311 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 10:25 pm
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>It's a history of violent left-wing extremism in the US in the 60s and 70s. It's really quite extraordinary - white leftist radicals got away with an unbelievable range of violence, from bombings to kidnappings
I think it was kind of a result of the social conditions in which it all took place. The 60s and 70s were obviously a period of massive social and political upheaval in the US (despite popular imagination, the 70s were much more so, and that was when violent left wing radicalism really hit its peak). There's a pretty clear progression in suspicion and scrutiny of law and intelligence institutions from the Chicago riots, to Kent State, to Watergate, to the Pyle revelations and culminating in the Church and Pike Committees. It wasn't a society where you could crack down on dissent, even violent dissent, with impunity. At a certain point the tide turned though, and Reagan's election was partly an expression of pent up contempt not just for perceived leniency on foreign pinkos but also for enemies closer to home. He transformed American politics on a fundamental level, which leaves what came prior to him looking pretty bizarre, but it was an aberrant time all round.
>> No. 25312 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 10:26 pm
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I'm not saying you're guilty of this, but there's a false moral equivalence that's doing the rounds and I don't get it. We're staring fascism in the face, and yet some of us will still take every opportunity to say, "do you know that those crazy leftie bastards fighting it believe in 58 genders, safe spaces and will go batshit if I call my mate Dave 'mah nigga'".

So. Fucking. What. Take a broader view, get your priorities in order and learn to tell an enemy when you see one. We (the level-headed, forever-right pragmatists of .gs, that is) will have to make common cause with those annoying vegetarian, zany-haired, activist brats on our Facebook feed when things come to a head. Don't fool yourself into believing you can be so breezy and clever - or, urgh, neutral - when the storm hits.

Of course, this is unless you're a nationalist or an alt-rightist and know you're on the fascist's side. In which case, I'll see you in Battle for Westfield.
>> No. 25313 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 10:29 pm
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Yes. Both very easily led and prone to pack mentality too. I don't think people are getting more stupid as much as propaganda is getting better and the very wealthy have more to lose. The old divide and conquer routine going back to colonising Africa.
>> No. 25314 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 10:50 pm
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I'm not a fascist or a nationalist, but I do think that lines of thought like "We will have to make common cause with those annoying vegetarian, zany-haired, activist brats on our Facebook feed when things come to a head and if you don't agree you are a fascist and a nationalist" are being used to force people to pick a side in what is going to be a "war" without winners.


Definitely agreed about propaganda. Social media has massively amplified the effects that propaganda has and the rate at which it spreads.
>> No. 25316 Anonymous
18th August 2017
Friday 11:18 pm
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There's an excellent episode of radio war nerd (a podcast I highly recommend to anyone interested in the history of conflict and insurgency) which discusses this book, as well as covering the topic more broadly, if anyone's curious.


(Discussion of the title subject starts at around 52:00)
>> No. 25317 Anonymous
19th August 2017
Saturday 12:01 am
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Rather them than actual nazis.
>> No. 25318 Anonymous
19th August 2017
Saturday 12:16 am
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What's your image proving?
>> No. 25320 Anonymous
19th August 2017
Saturday 12:48 am
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Not him but...

That a bunch of autists posting on the arse end of the internet are somehow a global Nazi threat which needs to be eliminated immediately rather than just ignored. Apparently.
>> No. 25321 Anonymous
19th August 2017
Saturday 1:13 am
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Nothing but that the gibbering is getting louder.
>> No. 25323 Anonymous
19th August 2017
Saturday 1:09 pm
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Only there aren't mad bastard fascists everywhere but there are plenty of mad leftists running around that are in tangible positions undermining science and meritocracy and liberal principals, ruining our astroid landings, and striving to restrict the exchange of free though in universities, and trying to normalise misandry. The false equivilance here is pretending that fascists are a remotely credible threat.

You've seen a handful of the far right appear halfway across the globe and now you feel we all must rally together against them, fuck off, that's not worthy of my time, but you'll justify that by talking about the greater potential threat the right poses. Have you forgotten that Italian fascism was fairly bloodless and the greatest massicures of the 20th century were leftists, or is it too no true Scotsman to admit.

Say it with me now 'lefties have been as bad and sometimes worse than Hitler', I don't know why people have a selective memory for Pol pot, Stalin and Mao, but they do. so when something sounds a bit too much like a Hitler quote people go mad, but no one seems to care about how aggressively militant left wing rhetoric is. I saw a woman wearing a stylizes portrait of Stalin on the tube yesterday. Could you see society being as indifferent to a picture of Hitler?

I known which one is more of a credible threat to my way of life, and it isn't a /Pol/ user 5000 miles away with a car. It's the people using the 'but when I do x...' be it censorship, racial or gender discrimination, mob justice, purging the unidelogically impure from the system, or genocide '...it is okay' that are normalising their bigotry and walk among us on a daily basis. They are the ones building the foundation for a totalitarian state not failchan.
>> No. 25324 Anonymous
19th August 2017
Saturday 1:25 pm
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>lefties have been as bad and sometimes worse than Hitler
That's the most asinine both sides shit I've ever read, congrats.
>> No. 25325 Anonymous
19th August 2017
Saturday 1:38 pm
25325 spacer
Barely coherent sinisterballs.
>> No. 25326 Anonymous
19th August 2017
Saturday 2:44 pm
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At least 30 million died during the great leap forward, possibly twice that. Between seven and ten million died in the holodomor. Pol Pot killed somewhere between 15% and 35% of the entire population of Cambodia.

Genocide is non-partisan.
>> No. 25327 Anonymous
19th August 2017
Saturday 3:03 pm
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>At least 30 million died during the great leap forward, possibly twice that. Between seven and ten million died in the holodomor
Famine resulting from failed agricultural policies is not the same thing as systematic industrial genocide.

Also, you might want to look into excess deaths from food deprivation in non-communist countries. The idea that industrialisation and collectivisation programmes in the USSR and China caused unique suffering is just flat out wrong.

>Pol Pot killed somewhere between 15% and 35% of the entire population of Cambodia
If you think the KR were leftist you quite probably haven't read anything about them past the introduction of their wiki page.
>> No. 25328 Anonymous ## Mod ##
19th August 2017
Saturday 3:35 pm
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Okay that's enough politics in /emo/.
I'm partly to blame for it too but let's leave it here.
>> No. 25354 Anonymous
24th August 2017
Thursday 12:55 pm
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The more I talk the more vulnerable I feel.
>> No. 25356 Anonymous
24th August 2017
Thursday 1:36 pm
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Is that like the saying that it's better to remain silent and be thought an idiot etc.?
>> No. 25357 Anonymous
24th August 2017
Thursday 2:02 pm
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..than talk and be proven one?
>> No. 25358 Anonymous
24th August 2017
Thursday 2:12 pm
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Thank you for demonstrating.
>> No. 25378 Anonymous
28th August 2017
Monday 11:33 pm
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I feel restless - like I want life to end already.
>> No. 25379 Anonymous
28th August 2017
Monday 11:46 pm
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So you feel like you've experienced everything life has to possibly offer you?
>> No. 25380 Anonymous
28th August 2017
Monday 11:54 pm
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No. It won't happen, so no point carrying on the charade.
>> No. 25381 Anonymous
29th August 2017
Tuesday 12:04 am
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So you feel a lack of control or agency?
>> No. 25383 Anonymous
29th August 2017
Tuesday 1:22 am
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That's a good way to put it I suppose.
>> No. 25385 Anonymous
29th August 2017
Tuesday 9:14 am
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Do you have any sort of creative outlet? You'd be surprised how much a little self expression if you are denying yourself it could make a difference to your mood.
>> No. 25391 Anonymous
29th August 2017
Tuesday 6:41 pm
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You might be right. I have bought a musical instrument, and picked up programming. Maybe that will distract me.
>> No. 25394 Anonymous
29th August 2017
Tuesday 11:28 pm
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If you're learning programming, check this out:

>> No. 25471 Anonymous
5th September 2017
Tuesday 2:29 am
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Pre-saged for utterly boring personal blog update:

Day 10 since my last (~10mg) dose of Venlafaxine after slowly cutting down from 112.5mg. No more brain zaps, almost no more "Whoosh Whoosh Whoosh" in the eardrums blood pressure sounds when I stand up too fast. My Anhedonia Orgasmica is slowly improving, albeit a lot slower than I had hoped given how short a period of time I was on this medication.

Thursday I managed 2.5 hours of exercise including 18 minutes of medium intensity sparring on only 0.5m of clonazepam. Friday I managed an hour but with 18 minutes of high intensity sparring and 6 minutes of low intensity - on no clonazepam at all. This also means that I haven't had any clonazepam since Thursday and I'm sure my psychiatrist would be delighted to hear this if I wasn't also off the SSRIs.

Anyway the irony is that I'm feeling and doing better today than any time since I took my first anti-depressant (Escitalopram) almost five months ago. I have my benzo use under control, I'm exercising, I even have three local tournaments lined up that I'm monitoring to see if my category has enough opponents to be worth signing up for. Next step is to get my drinking back to a "weekend only" basis and then I feel like I'm almost most of the way there towards being a functioning human again for the first time since 2011.

This seven-year trip into insanity, drugs abuse, dependency, and psychiatry has not been fun in any way (except for the meth addiction, the extra-marital affairs with university students ten years younger than me, and becoming a father).

Hopefully the end of the journey starts here.
>> No. 25525 Anonymous
6th September 2017
Wednesday 11:18 pm
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I have barely left the house for the last couple of weeks, and when I went out to the shop earlier I felt an undeniable social phobia. I never realised before how I need to maintain the skill of being outside with joe public.
>> No. 25646 Anonymous
16th September 2017
Saturday 10:43 am
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My girlfriend keeps nagging at me to visit my parents more often and for some reason it's proper winding me up.

I mean she's probably right, I don't see them often enough, but my family has never been as close as some are. That's just how we are. It doesn't mean we love each other any less, we've just never been the sort to pop round for tea and a natter.

She keeps getting maungy with me when I tell her to drop it, but I'm really struggling to articulate just precisely why this is none of her business and she needs to stop bringing it up.
>> No. 25648 Anonymous
16th September 2017
Saturday 3:52 pm
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That can be difficult - I also don't have a very close family and we don't really get together as often as some others. People who have "close" families find it weird, but its wrong for her to try and impose it on you. If you don't get on, you don't get on, visiting more often is unlikely to change anything (and going by my family, can often make things worse).
>> No. 25649 Anonymous
16th September 2017
Saturday 4:11 pm
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She wants to have sex with the milkman.
>> No. 25650 Anonymous
16th September 2017
Saturday 4:28 pm
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I wish the milkman would deliver my milk in the morning.
>> No. 25651 Anonymous
16th September 2017
Saturday 5:17 pm
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That is so alien to me. But I consider my parents abusive toxic pricks, and every one of my peers who has met them has agreed, so I might be an exception, but it really pisses me off when someone naively and obnoxiously insists people should have a close relationship with, and respect their parents as a result.
>> No. 25652 Anonymous
16th September 2017
Saturday 10:51 pm
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It's a very common and completely socially acceptable prejudice. When my violent, abusive and shamelessly unrepentant biological father was dying suddenly everyone I had ever met sprung up out of the woodwork to condescend to me about how I should just get over everything that happened to me when I was a kid.

I could handle the "it was different in my day" elderly relatives who seem to have been under the impression that choking and cigarette burns were an ordinary part of discipline back in the late 80s. Easy to dismiss as the cunts they were. Much tougher to deal with were friends who pretended to see things from my point of view or at least respect my decision but actually didn't and were more than willing to play both sides.

8 years later. No regrets. In fact I hope he suffered.
>> No. 25661 Anonymous
18th September 2017
Monday 6:20 pm
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She's the only thing that's made me happy all year but I'm too miserable to send her a text.
>> No. 25662 Anonymous
18th September 2017
Monday 8:00 pm
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im still in that job, surprised i havent offed myself
>> No. 25670 Anonymous
19th September 2017
Tuesday 8:06 pm
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You need a purpose mate. I found mine. I took days off work to find the flattest pebble ever. I haven't even come close and I checked out all of the south east.

After I find it, I will blow my savings on prozzies and drugs, and leave that pebble to my brother.
>> No. 25675 Anonymous
22nd September 2017
Friday 2:18 am
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Not if I shall have anything to do with it! The flattest pebble will be mine. I need it for my own collection of items men covet. And I shall resort to any means and spare no expense to acquire it. Good hunting but your venture is foolish.
>> No. 25676 Anonymous
23rd September 2017
Saturday 3:53 pm
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>>8 years later. No regrets. In fact, I hope he suffered.

you're not the only one who feels like that about there farther.

my father has done 12 years for ABH and various gun crimes. And he says leaving me and my mother was the best thing he could have done. I mean he's right but having a male role model in my life would have been nice growing up. I'm flying by the seat of my pants knowing what to do with my own children. I know im not going to be him.
>> No. 25677 Anonymous
25th September 2017
Monday 9:51 am
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I think I'm a serial seducer.

I don't wish to brag or even imply that I'm particularly good at it, but I can't stop doing it. I'm addicted to that chase you get in the first opening stages of a potential relationship, the sexual tension, the flirting. I get very bored very quickly once it reaches the more comfortable, predictable phase and invariably move on to a new conquest.

I have no idea what to do about this, but I think something does need to be done. It's making me into one of those "fuck-boy" cheating scumbag types.
>> No. 25678 Anonymous
25th September 2017
Monday 4:24 pm
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Care to share some techniques? despite lack of experience I've always found 'the chase' to be more interesting than what comes after.
>> No. 25679 Anonymous
26th September 2017
Tuesday 7:56 am
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This sounds like something you should talk through with a therapist. Maybe there is a reason you're this way and something you can do to change it.

You an' all.
>> No. 25680 Anonymous
26th September 2017
Tuesday 10:45 am
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>I think something does need to be done

It seems like perfectly normal behaviour for a young man, perhaps even ideal. Everyone enters into a relationship with that initial buzz and relationships breakdown if once that runs out you haven't made a deeper connection.

Obviously practice basic relationships hygiene; be forthright when you leave them, give them a good chance, don't cheat. Your problem is you simply haven't met the right woman yet and maybe aren't because you're either pulling the same tedious type or you set unrealistic expectations.


Only bitter women use this term as evidenced by the fact that it makes no sense: "Oh no, a man I met on a hook-up app was just looking to hook-up!"

I think that the 'full house' final rounds can be a waste when only one or two team members will actually answer all the questions. If you're playing the family version and you have plenty of players home then I'd always take the higher offer (if you agree the split the prize money).
>> No. 25681 Anonymous
26th September 2017
Tuesday 5:48 pm
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See the thing is I've had several relationships of varying length, a couple of them very involved and whsat people might call "serious"; and this has always been there in the back of my mind regardless of how much I think I love them. I must confess to cheating on a number of occasions, but I was smart enough to realise that this probably already meant the relationship was done for and ended it shortly thereafter.

I have considered the idea that I'm simply scared of commitment. It's like if you told me I could only eat one flavour of crisps for the rest of my life, I'd be mortified.


Well, thanks I suppose, but therapists don't vcome cheap, that's why I'm on an anopnymous imageboard instead.


Like I said, I don't claim to be that good at it. It's a numbers game, as I and others have highlighted before. You swipe enough or ask enough lasses out without being shy about it, eventually some say yes.

I've found that (and this is going to be a very blunt generalisation) women are either DTF or they turn you down straight away with barely a second glance. There's not much inbetween, and there's none of that magical romance that makes an otherwise uninterested girl like you. It's just finding one that likes you, and then playing along until she lets you in her knickers.
>> No. 25682 Anonymous
26th September 2017
Tuesday 5:57 pm
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> I've found that (and this is going to be a very blunt generalisation) women are either DTF or they turn you down straight away with barely a second glance.

I'm not sure I'd go so far as to say "DTF" foul Americanism that it is , but in my experience women know within a very short time of meeting you if they consider you a potential sexual partner or not. There are still plenty of opportunities, even then, to fuck things up twixt the cup and lip and I'm a veritable veteran at most of them.
>> No. 25683 Anonymous
26th September 2017
Tuesday 6:41 pm
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As vulgar as the term is, I find the it describes the psychology going on very well in shorthand. She knows almost immediately wether you are a viable mate or not, and if the answer is "not", then there's little that will change her mind, realistically.

Once you've gone through the charade a few times, though, I find it's quite difficult to do anything majorly wrong. You just have to go through the routine of making her laugh, slipping in flirtatious remarks here and there, and respond to hers appropriately. The most common way to get it wrong is misreading the signals, plunging onwards too fast.

The internet has made all of this very strange, mind you. A lot of the lasses I've hooked up with using POF or Tinder, it's been polite small talk for a few days, followed by more or less non-stop sexting for a bout a week or two before we even go on a date. And even then, it's a shallow pretence so that we're not just literally meeting to fuck.
>> No. 25684 Anonymous
26th September 2017
Tuesday 8:06 pm
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You're going to have to explain what kind of thoughts you have in the back of your mind but if you think it is a fear of commitment then, well you know you.

My guess is the range of possibilities and the fear of making the wrong choice is overwhelming when long-term it's going to be a complete roll of the dice no matter how nice they seem. In these situations let the rational part of you take over and stop to ask yourself 'What do I want?' drawing up options and their likely outcomes. I always advise you lads to take out a notepad and pen (or just use the computer notepad) and work problems out like a math sum then try to stick with the decision - if you get stuck then take the problem to pieces and assign objective values to find a judgement on.

For the record, a little doubt is normal and something we all have so I'd try not to feed those thoughts. I'm sure you've seen on television enough episodes where on the wedding day someone has jitters and think they are making a horrible mistake - until they remember why they are getting married.

>It's like if you told me I could only eat one flavour of crisps for the rest of my life, I'd be mortified.

What if you could choose pickled onion monster munch?

But seriously, try and think about what kind of crisp you want if you could only have one flavour. You only need to do this once in your life and I got pickled onion (or ready salted if I can't be fancy).
>> No. 25686 Anonymous
26th September 2017
Tuesday 9:28 pm
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I'm genuinely not trying to be a dick here and start a cunt off or anything but,

>I always advise you lads to take out a notepad and pen (or just use the computer notepad) and work problems out like a math sum then try to stick with the decision - if you get stuck then take the problem to pieces and assign objective values to find a judgement on.

seems like an incredibly dull way to go through life. Again I mean no offense at all.I'm sure you're probably doing much better than me at life and have a decent job and house and wife and all that shit but fuck.. trying to work out all life decisions as if they're a math sum. I dunno, just feels "wrong".

I am a veritable shambles of a man who only semi-regularly manages to get it away with a lady so fuck knows.

Sometimes it's worth the risk of getting your heartbroken/breaking a heart I think..

Sage for unhelpful beer rambling in /emo/.
>> No. 25687 Anonymous
26th September 2017
Tuesday 10:15 pm
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You don't do it all the time if that is what you're thinking. Some decisions even have to be taken by the gut if there are too many variables to consider.

More like if you have a problem you are stuck on it is a good idea to use a detached method to find the solution (this is why pen and paper helps) rather than emotionally flailing about or never getting a solution. Now which do you think is more dull, actually finding a solution and getting passed the problem or not. Forever.
>> No. 25688 Anonymous
27th September 2017
Wednesday 7:21 am
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Well fair play and thanks for the reply to my barely coherent post. In regards,

>Now which do you think is more dull, actually finding a solution and getting passed the problem or not. Forever.

I think it depends on the problem, especially in matters of the heart/willy, or what is perceived to be a problem but might not actually be. Maybe being a "fuccboi" isn't really a problem and is just another way of falling through life. It's only a problem if it's negatively affecting you or others, and I guess the lad posting about it here implies it probably is so I've just undermined my own argument.

I dunno mate. I'm a dunce to be quite honest.

You're probably right and are definitely giving far more sensible advice.

Emotionally flailing about and never getting a solution sounds like a reasonable description of life in general. For me at least.
>> No. 25689 Anonymous
27th September 2017
Wednesday 2:23 pm
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You people are talking about deciding whether you are sexually attracted to someone within the first few minutes of meeting them is something unique to the female psyche.
>> No. 25690 Anonymous
27th September 2017
Wednesday 5:24 pm
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It largely is; men are generally willing to everything that's not ancient or quasimodo-level hideous.
>> No. 25691 Anonymous
27th September 2017
Wednesday 5:30 pm
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Your statement doesn't support your assertion.
>> No. 25692 Anonymous
27th September 2017
Wednesday 7:09 pm
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Yeah, but we've generally decided that within the first moments of meeting someone.
>> No. 25693 Anonymous
27th September 2017
Wednesday 7:34 pm
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>quasimodo-level hideous.

Eldritch works quite well when you're looking for a way to describe abstract hideousness, indistinguishable from evil.
>> No. 25694 Anonymous
27th September 2017
Wednesday 8:54 pm
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Allow me to stick my oar in: That decision can change and it can go both ways depending on context and simple prolonged contact. I'm a firm believer in the idea that people mostly just want someone not completely repulsive and that they have a certain chemistry with, everything else is minutia.

It sounds like I'm talking out of my arse but how many of you here have thought about co-workers in a sexual context simply because you are around them all day? How many of you have thought you had died and come back as a sex god only to realise that you are simply the most handsome man in the club at 3am on a Thursday night?
>> No. 25695 Anonymous
27th September 2017
Wednesday 10:44 pm
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Right, but it's not a first impression thing where you have to actually meet them and get a vibe off them; it's a millisecond assessment of base physical attractiveness. A woman may be the most pathetic, annoying, entitled, spoiled and downright horrible person - but if she's attractive and has a working vagina then I know that I'd be willing to put my penis into it. Which is probably why I've spent so much of my life putting my dick in crazy.

> That decision can change and it can go both ways depending on context and simple prolonged contact.

Absolutely agree, but there is a big difference from being a potential sexual partner and actually becoming one. If a woman mentally places you in the "no way jose" box from the get go then it practically takes a miracle to change that.
>> No. 25696 Anonymous
28th September 2017
Thursday 1:06 pm
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Started back at uni again, taking another repeat year. Went to the welcome back lecture and felt so out of place. I'm incapable of making friends and basic social interaction, even though I've been here for years. Want to go to society events to get out of the house, but know when I get there I'll freeze up and be unable to talk to people. Feel like a failure of a human. Autism is suffering.
>> No. 25697 Anonymous
28th September 2017
Thursday 2:08 pm
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Get a few pints in you. There's a reason why freshers week is a giant piss-up - the British are genetically incapable of meaningful interaction with strangers while sober.
>> No. 25698 Anonymous
28th September 2017
Thursday 3:06 pm
25698 This again.
Basement rug.jpg
I'm worried I'll become suicidal if I fail my next ESA reassessment (Or PIP, whatever they're doing there). I'm also worried that if I tell them this they'll interpret it a a threat or ultimatum. The only way I can think to explain this to them is "I don't mean for this to be a threat but I fear I might commit suicide if rejected". I don't know if suicide is true but I'm certain I will struggle with my mental health considerably.

Testament to my fear is that I havn't even got the letter yet, I'm just projecting into the future. I kind of feel like If I don't experience this now though then my claim isn't genuine.

Failing certainly will be a kick in the backside that I need, but I can see it going either way. I guess thats the nature of chaos.
>> No. 25699 Anonymous
28th September 2017
Thursday 3:22 pm
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For what it's worth, you only need a couple of friends (or even a few acquaintances) to make uni comfortable. Being a slightly older student, you may find it easier to hang out with grads or post-grads... they tend to be less about partying. Good luck, but do try to figure something out.

If you're in Southampton, I'm willing to go out for a drink with you occasionally. Unlikely you're there, but I thought I'd mention it.
>> No. 25700 Anonymous
28th September 2017
Thursday 7:53 pm
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You just sound a bit shy which is something I know all too well, realistically nobody can handle a room full of strangers so don't beat yourself up. While we're here, unless you enjoy a hobby or just want to be useful I'd give the tea society a miss. These things are always full of people who go because they think it is something they have to do or they're just cocks.

As for a solution:
Do you not have housemates or a drug habit? If you're living with another lad just knock on his door and see if he fancies going for a pint.

Are you the lad who was talking about killing himself after the election?
>> No. 25701 Anonymous
29th September 2017
Friday 6:03 am
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They flat out asked me if I had suicidal ideation at mine, so if you just answer honestly, I don't think that will sound like emotional blackmail.
>> No. 25712 Anonymous
2nd October 2017
Monday 7:51 pm
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I'm going back to do my masters just for something to do, but I really like living in new places so that's a plus.

Working a retail job I hate, being bollocked by the public for not having any organic spinach, fuck those guys, I work two jobs 70+ hours a week, what makes them think they can talk to me like that? Rant over.
>> No. 25715 Anonymous
4th October 2017
Wednesday 2:03 pm
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If I find her attractive she's too good for me. Feels bad, yo. how do I raise my self image?
>> No. 25716 Anonymous
4th October 2017
Wednesday 2:51 pm
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Stop the ‘yo’s and pull your trousers up, I’m guessing?
>> No. 25717 Anonymous
4th October 2017
Wednesday 8:52 pm
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Maybe you find her attractive because she is too good for you? If you were better than her, would you feel attracted to her?
>> No. 25718 Anonymous
4th October 2017
Wednesday 9:02 pm
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>> No. 25724 Anonymous
5th October 2017
Thursday 9:23 pm
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This is what I don't get.
I'm sat here with my hand on my [spoiler]cock[/i], so i could quite literally pull my trousers up. Only, for whatever reason, I chose wanking as an identity; I'm the wanker in the family. Self abuse has long been my comfort and over time I've learned to lean on it as a crotch. In the past I've gone for extended periods of time without wanking excessively, maybe once a week at most and to pretty vanilla thoughts, and these times were generally the healthiest moments in my life.

So I guess I do get it, i'm just resisting. It's only as hard as you make it and I'm making it pretty hard right now.

I seem to have gone the other way and will generally attend to women who reflect my self image, if you know what I mean. People who aren't intimidating. Once I feel I have something genuine to offer maybe I'll start to feel worthy of the people I find attractive. More so on a personality level, that is.
>> No. 25725 Anonymous
6th October 2017
Friday 1:33 am
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Perhaps it would help to type with both hands.
>> No. 25728 Anonymous
9th October 2017
Monday 12:53 am
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Realised today that a load of people inexplicably unfriended me from their Facebooks with no communication, and it really bummed me out. I can't think of an particular motive beyond blind speculation, it seems like small petty shit to be worked up over, a web app that I hardly use, but I consider that a symbolic declaration they don't want me in their life ever again and it's hard not to feel rejected by that, particularly when these are people I've known for years.
>> No. 25729 Anonymous
10th October 2017
Tuesday 3:04 pm
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I unfriend people who are inactive. What's wrong with that? You seem really needy.
>> No. 25730 Anonymous
10th October 2017
Tuesday 3:27 pm
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This isn't some friend of a friend bullshit. One of them is a person I've known for years that I've traveled abroad with multiple times, and had purposely blocked me. Intially I assumed they had just deleted their account, but they seemed to single me out. I'm inclined to think that they took sides with someone else I fell out with, I just expected better from them really.
>> No. 25731 Anonymous
10th October 2017
Tuesday 7:24 pm
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Not him but alright that's different. There must be some reason that someone would go out of their way to do that.
>> No. 25738 Anonymous
15th October 2017
Sunday 2:10 pm
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Me and my girlfriend are probably going to break up pretty soon, her issue with me is only that I am not multiple people, and I don't feel like compromising on that point. I wasn't expecting this I have no exit strategy. I feel a bit lost in how to focus on what I should do next, I don't have a job and I've got less than £100 and until this morning when my living arrangement changed I was ineligible for benifits.
>> No. 25739 Anonymous
15th October 2017
Sunday 4:01 pm
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Go to the Citizens Advice Bureau tomorrow morning. They'll work out what you're entitled to and tell you how to claim it.
>> No. 25740 Anonymous
15th October 2017
Sunday 7:36 pm
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Thanks for the practical solution lad. I will do that tomorrow.

I'm emotionally unsure right now, I feel lost, I don't know what is going to happen to me, it is like my life was turned upside down.
>> No. 25747 Anonymous
19th October 2017
Thursday 5:15 pm
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What is it I feel when looking back on my life through the medias I absorbed as a youngster? What I mean is .. when listening to System of a Down again (what can I say) I realise where a lot of the thoughts I have these days come from, or at least where they were catalysed. Music seems to be the major one, it tends to be where we identify most (as such could it be said music is a purer form of art?)

List listening to music of my childhood makes me wish for better days. Back when I had lesser troubles.

It's like I want to say 'MY LIFE IS A LIIIIIIIIE', but I know that's not really true; we are what we do and all that, there is no human without its environment, etc. I just donno, man. I'm thinking maybe it's not such a pleasant thing to understand yourself, but I still want to try, you know?
>> No. 25748 Anonymous
19th October 2017
Thursday 5:35 pm
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The older I get the more sensetive I become to certain forms of media, because of the memories they evoke; or ore accurately, the feelings about particular elements of myself that I see reflected in them. As a younger man I could watch/listen to/read nearly anything and I just accepted it for what it was, if it was good I liked it and if it was bad I laughed at it. But these days I'm much more susceptible to bad vibes when I'm choosing something to put on.

I have considered that this is just the "wisdom" that comes with age, and probably the reason most people stop doing drugs etc at some point or another. It all just gets too much and you have to simmer it down eventually.
>> No. 25749 Anonymous
19th October 2017
Thursday 6:38 pm
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I hear you. I can barely watch films these days without getting a lump in my throat at seemingly irrelevant moments. going to the cinema is pretty much written off, I almost freaked when I saw a guardians of the galaxy trailer.
>> No. 25774 Anonymous
3rd November 2017
Friday 10:29 am
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I don't care about anything and it's starting to scare me. I just can't give a fuck about fuck all. I could fall under a train and I'd only be bothered by the momentary discomfort.
>> No. 25775 Anonymous
3rd November 2017
Friday 12:32 pm
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That sounds like depression, to be honest. Well, the numbness your mind creates as a defence mechanism. If you're numb you're not suicidal. It's the brain making a natural mood enhancer. When my Gran died, the women who raised me, I didn't cry until the next year which also scared me as I was self aware enough to realise that was off. When I did cry, it was on her Birthday and I had been doing a lot of exercise and socialising the months leading up to it. It was what convinced me I was finally on the mend.

Based on my totally anecdotal evidence, I think you're in a transitional phase and you'll start to recover soon if you start small and work towards no goal in particular. I started off going for walks in the evening, walk in the rain were my favourite as it was like the world had been muted.
>> No. 25776 Anonymous
3rd November 2017
Friday 7:15 pm
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>I could fall under a train and I'd only be bothered by the momentary discomfort.

Put yourself in a dangerous situation and find if your attitude changes. Don't you still look for cars when crossing the road?
>> No. 25777 Anonymous
3rd November 2017
Friday 7:55 pm
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Why are you calling him edgy?
>> No. 25778 Anonymous
3rd November 2017
Friday 8:07 pm
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I was being a bit hyperbolic.
>> No. 25779 Anonymous
4th November 2017
Saturday 12:00 am
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I don't know who is edgier, the people who claim not to care about anything to the point of suicide, or the people who encourage them to do it.
>> No. 25780 Anonymous
4th November 2017
Saturday 1:44 am
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I'm reaching new lows in my life and how to be edgy couldn't be further from my thoughts. Wanting it all stop, though, couldn't be closer.
>> No. 25781 Anonymous
4th November 2017
Saturday 2:26 am
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Actually not caring about anything to the point that it doesn't matter if you live or die is fucking awful, there is nothing edgy about it.

But the people who talk about not caring without promoting usually do care. They badly require emotional validation but either lack the emotional tools or the support network to get it, like Aesop's fox and the grapes, they deny they want what they can't have.

The fact that you consider them edgy rather than in need of pity says more about what makes you uncomftable and how you deal with that, than it says about them I think. Do you choose to avoid existential crises rather than confront them?
>> No. 25782 Anonymous
4th November 2017
Saturday 8:31 am
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The bank has sent a letter informing me that I am due to start paying back the loan for my research degree on the 30th of this month. I thought I had until the end of January but I was wrong. I've not finished my thesis yet and I know it won't be done and dusted by the 30th. Even the end of January felt like a stretch with the viva and getting over this writers block I've had for months.

So I guess that is that. To top it off I'm getting a head start on the job search because there is nothing else I can do before the banks lines open and it's all work that involves telephone customer service (the one thing I went into university to escape) and my CV is feeling a little light after the better part of a decade in full-time education.

It's been a shitty week, a shitty year and now the rest of the month is looking worse. Actually, looking at the repayment schedule the next 19 months are going to be bad.
>> No. 25783 Anonymous
4th November 2017
Saturday 11:57 am
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Is this a career development loan?
>> No. 25784 Anonymous
4th November 2017
Saturday 1:33 pm
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Yeah, I imagine the bank will be flexible with repayments when I call them on Monday but I've been flagging on my work for months now so maybe I need to jump. At any rate at 9.9% APR I'm going to have to mess about taking out a better loan to pay it off which might turn into its own circle of hell.

It's something I will need to talk over with my supervisor and in the meantime I will send a few feelers out there for jobs over the weekend.
>> No. 25785 Anonymous
4th November 2017
Saturday 2:44 pm
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Ex-CAB debt advisor here. Check out CONC 7 of the FCA Handbook. It sets out the rules that lenders are obliged to follow when dealing with debtors in arrears or default. Of particular note is CONC 7.3.11 and 7.12.2 - if you speak to a CAB or other debt advisor, the creditor is legally required to suspend all debt collection efforts until a repayment plan is agreed.

It's worth speaking to an advisor even if you're very confident in dealing with your own finances, because it immediately stops the clock on any enforcement action. CONC 7.7.5 states that creditors can only impose charges that cover the reasonable costs of enforcement action - if they're not allowed to take enforcement action, then they're not allowed to charge fees.

It might not seem like it, but you've actually got your creditor over a barrel. Get in touch with the CAB or National Debtline, they'll see you right.

>> No. 25786 Anonymous
11th November 2017
Saturday 7:46 pm
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How do you cope without anyone to talk to and no support network?
Not just people to shoot the shit with but actually talk to.
>> No. 25787 Anonymous
11th November 2017
Saturday 8:09 pm
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Seconding this. Whenever I hear people talking about their depression, there's always a small credits section of people they thank, and I'm like "should I draw a face on my hand and chat with that?", but I think that's just going to escalate the matter.
>> No. 25788 Anonymous
11th November 2017
Saturday 8:29 pm
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For years Natan Sharansky played mental chess against himself while the Soviets kept him in solitary confinement and he went on to beat Kasparov during a simultaneous exhibition, but that might be somewhat extreme.
>> No. 25790 Anonymous
12th November 2017
Sunday 2:22 am
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>>25786 >>25787

The Samaritans aren't just for people who are suicidal, they're for anyone who is experiencing distress. You can talk to them about whatever's on your mind at any hour of the day or night. They're free to call on any landline or mobile on 116 123. You can also email them via jo@samaritans.org or talk to someone face-to-face at your local branch office.



If you're struggling with mental health problems or addiction, there are plenty of support groups available. It can be really useful to just have a cup of tea and a chat with people facing similar difficulties.



I think that voluntary work can be really useful in boosting your self-esteem and making you feel more connected to other people. Everyone needs help at some point and it can feel really good to be the helper. Whatever your skills and interests are, there's something that you can do to help your community.

>> No. 25791 Anonymous
12th November 2017
Sunday 12:16 pm
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Why are Russians so good at chess, anyway?
>> No. 25792 Anonymous
12th November 2017
Sunday 12:57 pm
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It is their national sport, so unlike here where people will bully you for showing an interest they will actively encourage play. It was regularly used by them to prove who's best during the cold war, so being good at it is really important to them.
>> No. 25793 Anonymous
12th November 2017
Sunday 10:16 pm
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I'm getting letters from "Past due" or something addressed to someone else. Right now I'm thinking to ring them up, tell them that person doesn't live here any more and advise them that if I have to waste any more time dealing with them in any form, be it letters, phonecalls or bailiffs, I'll be billing them for it. Can you comment on this plan?
>> No. 25794 Anonymous
12th November 2017
Sunday 10:41 pm
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Can you book a doctors appointment by just walking into the surgery itself? I wanted to tomorrow, but I'm going to run out of credit tonight so I can't call.
>> No. 25795 Anonymous
12th November 2017
Sunday 10:49 pm
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Yes. If you get there super early sometimes you can get a same day booking but you might have to wait there for 8 hours.
>> No. 25796 Anonymous
12th November 2017
Sunday 11:21 pm
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Well, I only live about 25 minutes away so I think I'd just go home for seven-ish hours, but thanks a lot.
>> No. 25797 Anonymous
13th November 2017
Monday 9:12 am
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You have to sit in the waiting room until they call your name. If you leave they take you off the list. That was my experience, at least.
>> No. 25798 Anonymous
13th November 2017
Monday 9:21 am
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Cross out the address, write "not known at this address" on the envelope and drop it in a postbox. Royal Mail will return it to the sender.

>> No. 25799 Anonymous
13th November 2017
Monday 10:54 am
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I've been doing that. I did it again now as you suggested but I was looking forward to that phonecall.
>> No. 25800 Anonymous
15th November 2017
Wednesday 3:44 pm
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I keep sending weird messages.

I don't mean to, but I'll hit the enter key then immediately realise how strange it is, the other ways it could be interpreted, then hate myself for the rest of the day.

Why am I like this? I should probably just go full social isolation because it's the only way I can avoid endless self-hatred and making a complete fool of myself.
>> No. 25801 Anonymous
15th November 2017
Wednesday 4:15 pm
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If it makes you think about it for the rest of the day, then get into the habit of stopping before you press enter and thinking about it.
>> No. 25802 Anonymous
15th November 2017
Wednesday 6:19 pm
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Just play up to it. You have to own your wierd personality traits, and realise that people probably don't hate you for it. Have a bit of self deprecating banter with the people you send them to and try not to over think it all.
>> No. 25803 Anonymous
16th November 2017
Thursday 12:08 am
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If a weird obnoxious twat like Russell Brand can turn saying strange things into a knobbing tactic, then so can you.
>> No. 25804 Anonymous
16th November 2017
Thursday 5:01 pm
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Pffft! Fucking hell, I'm 23 in a month. I know that's not remotely old or anything but I swear I was 19 about 15 minutes ago. I really need to get my shit together. Football Manager considers the cut off for personal progress to be 24 and who am I to disagree?
>> No. 25806 Anonymous
20th November 2017
Monday 6:21 pm
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So I'm being chased for debt from 02 for a phone contract I fucking cancelled two years ago.

I've phoned them up and phoned the bullshit "upgrade team" third party cunts as well as the debt collectors and given them all my story. None of them reckon they can help and each of them claims it's somebody else's responsibility, not theirs.

I'm sure they all think I'm just some chancer trying to get away without paying it, but the thing is I have fucking proof I sent it back, I sent it by recorded delivery and I still have a copy of that receipt saved. But I'm going around in circles trying to get anywhere.

Do I have to bloody sue them or what? This shit's causing a big black mark on my credit file that I want rid of. It's like I've been scammed except it's by a massive company who is supposed to do things right.

(Yes I know you're going to say "go to Citizen's Advice" but it's a Monday night so I'm not going to have chance any time soon.)
>> No. 25807 Anonymous
20th November 2017
Monday 6:49 pm
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You can phone CAB, their advisors phone up and badger O2 for you once you forward them the appropriate information. I had the same problem with 3.
>> No. 26165 Anonymous
13th February 2018
Tuesday 1:40 pm
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How do I stop making others' feelings my problem?

If people act negative towards me I'll feel like shit until they don't, even if I haven't done anything to cause it in the first place.

[x] autism
>> No. 26166 Anonymous
13th February 2018
Tuesday 2:03 pm
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>How do I stop making others' feelings my problem?
>> No. 26167 Anonymous
13th February 2018
Tuesday 4:52 pm
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There are lots of self help books out there about having healthy boundaries. I haven't read any so can't recommend anything specific.
>> No. 26168 Anonymous
13th February 2018
Tuesday 5:36 pm
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>cancelling a phone contract

I bet you just stopped paying them and didn't bother reading the T+Cs.
>> No. 26178 Anonymous
14th February 2018
Wednesday 1:47 am
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So many people get their credit ruined by phone contracts.
>> No. 26179 Anonymous
14th February 2018
Wednesday 2:09 am
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>> No. 26181 Anonymous
16th February 2018
Friday 8:38 pm
26181 spacer

Not quite lad. It was an upgrade where they sent me the wrong phone. I called them and said I'd like to cancel it and just get a new phone and new number separately (i.e from somewhere else). The bloke on the phone said it would be cancelled.

That was the end of that until I started getting letters asking me to pay for my business phone line and broadband dongle. Which was, needless to say, news to me.

So either way I doubt the T&Cs are even relevant, considering they planned to charge me for a dongle I was never told about, never received, nor asked for.
>> No. 26197 Anonymous
4th March 2018
Sunday 11:20 pm
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I'm tired of the endless cycle of committing myself to someone, only to have them give up a few years down the line. I just don't have the energy for it all anymore.

Ticked because 'moan'.
>> No. 26198 Anonymous
4th March 2018
Sunday 11:29 pm
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God I love that song (and nearly all of the Carpenters, if I'm truly honest). Particularly when feeling a bit miserable.


I much prefer this to the original.
>> No. 26199 Anonymous
5th March 2018
Monday 2:47 am
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And now I have this on repeat.
>> No. 26203 Anonymous
8th March 2018
Thursday 7:19 pm
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Minor relationship advice please:

I'm an autistic virgin so I'm not the best at reading situations. There is this girl I talk to all the time, and she even invited me round to hers last night to drink and watch some shit on YouTube. But then, when I got there, she didn't even sit on the same sofa as me (going as far as to lie on the other so I couldn't even move across).

What does this mean?
>> No. 26204 Anonymous
8th March 2018
Thursday 7:25 pm
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She likes you, but she doesn't want to shag you. It's not rocket surgery m8.
>> No. 26205 Anonymous
8th March 2018
Thursday 7:34 pm
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In my experience girls don't invite you round on your tod unless shagging is on the cards at some point in the future, even if they do spend half the night on the other sofa. It's not necessarily as cut and dried as otherlad might think.

Unfortunately if you're as autistic as you say you are then picking up on the natural cues of if she likes you or likes likes you might be a bit of a problem going on down the line.

Maybe invite her round to yours to cook her dinner and share a bottle of wine, if she agrees to that then that's a major cue.
>> No. 26206 Anonymous
10th March 2018
Saturday 12:01 am
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She's just testing the waters lad, the sofa thing is more like how you'd sit at opposite sides of a table on a pub date. As long as you didn't totally sperg out on her, you might still be in there.
>> No. 26207 Anonymous
10th March 2018
Saturday 1:13 am
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Fellow autist here

Hard to say exactly what is going on there are a thousand factors in the equation that no one else can decipher without seeing the pair of you together and knowing your history with each other. I wouldn't read too much into it yet.

I don't know what age you are, but it took me many years of incompetent fumbling around, and appreciating I wasn't wholly undesirable for me to start reading the sexual interest of others right, and even then when you are doing everything right the other person isn't an expert in reading and sending signals either. But I did learn through trial and error and you can too.

Try not to over think these things. Over thinking is the way of our people, but that way lies madness in this instance. You've got an obsession with trying to get laid on the brain. Ignore it, it will fuddle your logic. Let things play out organically based on what is going on around you, not what is in your head. Try to think of things from their perspective and what they want, and what they are trying to achieve with the things they are doing this might give you the insight you need.

If things are going that way you want there will probably come a moment when you will need to take the initiative physically, I can't tell you when that moment is, it is guess work to everyone but you can get reads by assessing how they react to you. If you can recognise someone is into you without them saying it that is the biggest confidence boost you can get. For me that came from being able to recognise how people react to my humour and stories. If people are willing to be playful with you especially physical contact, chances are really good they are into you and it is only a matter of time.

Good luck, keep us in the loop on how this develops.
>> No. 26208 Anonymous
11th March 2018
Sunday 12:17 pm
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Thanks for the responses, lads. I'm 23, bordering 24, which is a fairly pathetic age to be a virgin considering my parents were married by the time they were this age, but it's part of the reason I'm wary of things -- I don't want to come off like a fucking 12 year old but it will happen and I don't know if I am mentally ready for that but I have to be.

It's just eminently frustrating to me that I cannot understand the most basic of human interactions, something that most people understand at an intrinsic level, but to me it's like being like a cat trying to land a plane.

It took me years to be able to make friends like a normal human, and I don't want to alienate those (because if I read the situation wrong then I stand to lose her as a friend and also her friends), so I'm always torn.

I didn't sperg out on the night, so I guess I'll see what happens.
>> No. 26209 Anonymous
11th March 2018
Sunday 3:27 pm
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It's alright lad, I'm nearly 26 and sex and relationships don't appear in my mind at all now. It's just something other people do, not for the likes of me.

If you know any good bullet salesmen do put me in touch.
>> No. 26210 Anonymous
11th March 2018
Sunday 4:09 pm
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You might want to be wary of pursuing her at all then mate. The transition from genuine friend to relationship, and all that entails, rarely survives intact. If the relationship goes sour you lose all that you have already and end up wishing you hadn't bothered.
>> No. 26211 Anonymous
11th March 2018
Sunday 5:07 pm
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But to think that it is the ONLY imperative we really have on this planet (not that I want kids, but that's beside the point), it is just an endless source of frustration. I didn't really care until recently, until it hit me just quite how much of a failure I am.

Hm, that is a good point. Better safe than sorry, I guess. I'm not head over heels about her, anyway.
>> No. 26212 Anonymous
11th March 2018
Sunday 8:47 pm
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> until it hit me just quite how much of a failure I am.

You are not a failure. Live life for yourself, not for others expectations (ironically if you do this then you will become attractive to women, but this cannot be your goal).

Firstly, being autistic/aspergers is no barrier to women and sex. I base this off my observations in the software industry of some clear autists who also have wifes and kids. I suspect I am myself slightly autistic and even I have been in circumstances where I am 99% sure that I could have got myself laid if I had decided I wanted to.

As it happens, I am 30 and a virgin. The reasons for this are personal and very difficult to talk about, even on here, and so they are difficult to resolve.
>> No. 26408 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 7:02 pm
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A girl from work is leaving and I am really going to miss her.

She brightens up my day with her smile and the silly messages she sends me.

I think her new job will be good for her... but I selfishly want to keep her with me and also bonk her
>> No. 26409 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 7:39 pm
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It's not too late, lad, grab the bull by the horns and proposition her at the leaving party.
>> No. 26411 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 8:41 pm
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This is a blessing in disguise lad. We all know you should never shit where you eat- So now that she's leaving so you can safely give her a good arse-pissing.
>> No. 26412 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 9:01 pm
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As above, you can bonk her now you're not working with her. On her last day tell her you have really enjoyed working with her, you'd like to stay friends, can we keep in touch, etc.
>> No. 26414 Anonymous
28th March 2018
Wednesday 9:37 pm
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What is this, 1988. Who says bonk nowadays.

-11 is right, workplace relationships are generally a living nightmare - when they happen you have almost no choice or free will in the matter. If it was going to happen by now, it would have.
>> No. 26423 Anonymous
29th March 2018
Thursday 12:20 am
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>> No. 26426 Anonymous
29th March 2018
Thursday 12:43 am
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Cyclists and some other, lesser sportspeople use 'bonk' to mean when you run out of energy so badly you hit 'the wall'.

I really wish they wouldn't.
>> No. 26427 Anonymous
29th March 2018
Thursday 2:50 am
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>> No. 26484 Anonymous
8th April 2018
Sunday 11:43 am
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Increasingly I am thinking this will only end one way.
>> No. 26548 Anonymous
29th April 2018
Sunday 8:38 pm
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Always goes the same way:

Meet someone new, have interesting conversation, I BECOME A SOCIALLY RETARDED CUNT and fuck it up. Every time. Every. Fucking. Time.

Christ. I never thought I'd have as much seething, white-hot hatred for myself as I do yet not do anything about it. I would have liked to think of myself as pragmatic but I'm even a useless cunt at that.
>> No. 26549 Anonymous
29th April 2018
Sunday 8:42 pm
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Ooh, get you, me from three weeks back, talking big like you're gonna' do shit. Slit or get off the pot, loser.
>> No. 26550 Anonymous
29th April 2018
Sunday 9:29 pm
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Women are just men with tits, lad. When you get into that mindset, they're easier to talk to. You stop thinking things like "I need to impress her" and start thinking and accepting things like "I mean, we both probably like sex. I'll bring the subject up at a more appropriate time. Meanwhile, I bet she'll like this article."
>> No. 26552 Anonymous
29th April 2018
Sunday 9:36 pm
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>We're both bloody good blokes, unlike that Turkish shepherd who chewed off his own knackers.
>> No. 26556 Anonymous
29th April 2018
Sunday 11:32 pm
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>women are just men with tuts.

That is fundamentally not true. They are strange vain creatures that resemble men and are concerned with something they call 'feelings'. You try having a bit of friendly rivalry and ribbing like you do with the lads and watch how badly and quickly their ego bruises. Don't get me wrong they are fully realised three dimensional people but they aren't like men with tits you can't treat them the same unless you and your male friends are all metrosexuals.
>> No. 26557 Anonymous
30th April 2018
Monday 12:54 am
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Who said it was just women I struggle to have normal conversations with? I don't even realise what I'm doing til after the damage is done.

I don't think you can use such broad strokes, lad.
>> No. 26558 Anonymous
30th April 2018
Monday 1:04 am
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>I don't think you can use such broad strokes.

I'm sorry, you are right. I take back what I said about them being fully realised three dimensional people. It was unfair of me to presume they all are.
>> No. 26560 Anonymous
30th April 2018
Monday 1:14 am
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This is /emo/ so stop fucking about.
>> No. 26561 Anonymous
30th April 2018
Monday 1:57 am
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We are not trying to talk someone down from the ledge we are trying to get foot in the mouth lad laid. Have a bit of perspective. The entire drive of the conversation is to get someone 'fucking about'.
>> No. 26563 Anonymous
30th April 2018
Monday 1:00 pm
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In the same week that someone murdered a bunch of people because they had a warped perception of women don't you dare try and suggest it isn't important.
>> No. 26564 Anonymous
30th April 2018
Monday 1:53 pm
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Unless you believe OP is about to murder some women because of the content of this thread I suggest you both stop shitting up a perfectly good /emo/ thread. Take it to one of the many ongoing sexism discussions open elsewhere on the site.
>> No. 26565 Anonymous
30th April 2018
Monday 6:08 pm
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Fuck off.
>> No. 26566 Anonymous
30th April 2018
Monday 8:09 pm
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>I suggest you both stop shitting up a perfectly good /emo/ thread
If you read my post that's what I'm asking him to stop doing. /emo/ is not the place to talk about how you think women are all the same.
>> No. 26567 Anonymous
30th April 2018
Monday 8:19 pm
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People need help with all sorts of emotional and psychological problems and there is no set way to discuss them beyond being supportive, stop being a tedious bore.
>> No. 26568 Anonymous
30th April 2018
Monday 8:43 pm
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I also think women are more or less all the same. It's not an insult, we don't have to all be special flowers.
>> No. 26597 Anonymous
4th May 2018
Friday 6:37 pm
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It'd be nice to have at least one parent who didn't need to be pissed by early evening just to get through a day.
>> No. 26598 Anonymous
5th May 2018
Saturday 2:54 pm
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I don't mean to belittle your problem but I've days, weeks, where I've needed two bottles of wine to get out of bed in the morning. If you think that your parents are developing a problem maybe take the more open minded one (if they exist) and take them to an AA meeting.

The first half is all bollocks about 12 steps some idiots from Ohio of all places dreamt up almost a hundred years ago about how to be a perfect human or whatever, it's essentially a cult. (Getting slightly off topic here but.... ) Some people need that cult and even though they haven't had a drink for 20 years they keep on turning up every day to these fucking meetings trying to perform these 12 steps and rid themselves of their thetans oh wait wrong cult....

But the second hour is sharing hour and you can talk about problems you have with your drinking, if you've drunk recently, how long you're sober if you are. I like to talk about how my father was an alcoholic bastard and how I go into a fugue state when I go into a supermarket to buy a bottle of coke zero and a sandwhich and suddenly come to in the alcohol aisle.

Anyway, most people reject AA out of hand due to the cultish aspects, which is kind of sad because there are actually useful aspects to it. What I'm trying to say is if one of your parents comes, turn up an hour late; they don't have to speak, they can just listen to other people and maybe they'll hear things from other people that they recognize in themselves or maybe not. But it'd have to be worth an hour of anyone's time if they might possibly be developing a drinking issue? Even if they never go again just getting some perspective by hearing the stories of people who didn't get a little temperance together can be a great thing.

Sage for long rambling post.
>> No. 26599 Anonymous
5th May 2018
Saturday 4:38 pm
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Not sure if this is the right thread to post this in, but I'm beginning to learn that women don't react well to being 'ghosted'.

The other day I bumped into a girl I had apparently ghosted after sleeping with her twice. We ended up spending the day together, by virtue of doing the same activity. She was telling me that she enjoyed the time we had spent together before I'd ghosted her, and when I suggested we did stuff again, she said we can do it as friends, but that the ~moment's gone~ and I wouldn't get to fuck her, which I thought was a weird thing to say.

Anyway, we ended up drinking with my mates, who told me she was obviously still into me. After a few pints we got the bus home and ended up snogging and all of that stuff. The next day she texts me saying she shouldn't have kissed me, that she's not looking for anything serious, and that she doesn't think we're 'compatible' (still not sure I know what 'compatible' feels like, but I guess that's a topic for a whole other emo thread).

Incidentally, I got in touch with another girl who I'd had a date with a few weeks ago, which ended up with snogging and us agreeing to hang out again. She also told me the "window of opportunity had passed" because my response time had been really slow, and then blocked me on Whatsapp.

I had always been led to believed that women's interest in a person increased if they were not available - 'treat them mean, keep them keen' etc. But I am only just learning that this is not necessarily the case.
>> No. 26600 Anonymous
5th May 2018
Saturday 4:46 pm
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You don't ghost people you want to fuck, you be vague, keep in contact and stay flirty. You still have to remain in contact or their heads turn. A simple adjustment is all you need, who told you ghosting women was a good idea for anything other than avoiding someone you had a regrettable one night stand with? That's misguided PUA nonsense, lad.
>> No. 26601 Anonymous
5th May 2018
Saturday 5:14 pm
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I don't do it 'strategically', but out of laziness more than anything.
>> No. 26602 Anonymous
5th May 2018
Saturday 7:17 pm
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Another problem solved.

Where is my CBE, purps?
>> No. 26603 Anonymous
5th May 2018
Saturday 8:20 pm
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I've accidentally attracted women more by giving up on them. If they're playing hard to get or being coy or just clearly not that arsed with you, and you stop replying to them, they either forget about you and that's that, or they go FUCKING MENTAL because they're not used to being brushed off.

I suspect it only works with the very, very pretty ones/narcissists.
>> No. 26604 Anonymous
5th May 2018
Saturday 9:41 pm
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It's all about the push / pull m8. Even the femenists figured that one out back when they wrote "men are from mars...."


"The moment has passed" means, as they say in Brazil, "A fila anda" - in other words you missed your chance and she's taking another fucker's length.
>> No. 26605 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 12:13 am
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Yeah a similar thing happened to me a while ago. I went on a couple of dates with this girl, but even though we enjoyed hanging out I didn't feel like like there were any sparks flying and to be honest I felt like she was wasting my time a bit. I didn't message her for 3 or 4 weeks and she didn't message me either so I thought she wasn't that into me. But after that we bumped into each other at a party and very quickly left together. Sometimes you just need to apply enough alcohol to the problem.
>> No. 26606 Anonymous
8th May 2018
Tuesday 12:42 am
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It's an old septic joke but British people don't date, and we shouldn't try to emulate our transatlantic cousins at it; we simply get sambuccad up and throw ourselves at each other.
>> No. 26615 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 8:14 pm
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I've been on a bunch of dates recently but never get as far as progressing things beyond a second meeting. The latest one has just ghosted me after saying they wanted to hang out again. Don't get what I'm doing wrong really. Is it inevitable to go through this much rejection as a guy?
>> No. 26617 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 10:20 pm
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Phone up Scott Mills and have him find out why you were ghosted. 👻
>> No. 26618 Anonymous
9th May 2018
Wednesday 11:11 pm
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I think so, mate. I've been through the same thing, including the old 'I'd love to see you again once I return from my fifty-year mission to the Phantom Zone' trick. But now I'm in a happy long-term relationship. Don't take it personally and just keep trying, you'll eventually find someone you click with.
>> No. 26619 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 1:09 am
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>Is it inevitable to go through this much rejection as a guy?

Pretty much. I think pre-tinder era, you got more of an explanation/polite rejection IRL, but these days people seem fine just disappearing.

It's frustrating as it's hard to know if you're doing something wrong that you could improve, or if you've just been a bit unlucky, and I'm not just saying this to be nice - it's likely the latter.
>> No. 26621 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 12:28 pm
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>I think pre-tinder era, you got more of an explanation/polite rejection IRL, but these days people seem fine just disappearing.

In Friends, which I watched as a kid, throughout the series Joey would date women, have sex with them, and then never call them again. Whenever he encountered one of these women again, they were found to hate him.
>> No. 26622 Anonymous
10th May 2018
Thursday 1:27 pm
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I've basically got an hour of mental energy per day and then I go bonkers and curl up like a dead Woodlouse.
>> No. 26623 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 3:58 pm
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My mood has been inexplicably low for the last 24 hours. I'm beginning to wonder if my doctor prescribed me a placebo instead of mood stablisers as an experiment. Posting in this thread rather than starting a new one because i don't think there is really any constructive advice emo can give me that I don't know and haven't given myself. I just want to have a moan anonymously. My brain is broken no one has a good fix for it, and it leads to spontaneously shitty days. Meeting with the doctor next week maybe they will increase my dose or reveal the ruse and give me something functional.
>> No. 26624 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 8:14 pm
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> mood stablisers

In my experience they take about two weeks to kick in properly. Before that you're just a crying mess who bursts into tears at random moments for no real reason at all 24/7.

I can only thank any god who can hear me that I'm no longer on the SSRIs that were triggering my manic episodes. I should be dead about 10 ten times over by now - I don't know what my mission here on earth actually IS but I obviously haven't completed it yet because somehow I'm still fucking here.
>> No. 26625 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 10:02 pm
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I'm well over the 2 week mark at this point. I switched to SNRIs about 2 months ago from Mirtazapine and somedays they seem to do nothing at all. I might actually be feeling worse now then when I wasn't medicated.

Mirtazapine was great for me apart from my constant sleeping and drowsiness made me unfit for work hence the change in med. But this definitely feels like a step backwards.
>> No. 26626 Anonymous
11th May 2018
Friday 10:15 pm
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Manic episodes of the euphoric, productive kind?
>> No. 26627 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 4:36 am
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No more the shitpost wildly, be overly aggressive over perceived slights, talk a lot, talk bollocks, and generally act like you've whacked a henry of coke in the last hour, without being classifiable as psychosis sort (because you're totally lucid, you just find things like taking the piss out of the police lads for "voting UKIP" and asking if they joined the police because they failed their Argos exam three times absolutely hilarious).

I've had episodes of methamphetamine enduced euphoria that may have appeared to be Manic states from the outside but were actually just dopamine-mediated periods of 4-5 days where I wouldn't eat, sleep, consume anything that wasn't tea, Rennies, or 8%+ ABV Polish lager and write thousands of lines of code.

Actual Bi-Polar manic episodes in my experience tend to superficially more similar to schizophrenic episodes where what you're doing makes no sense to any outside observer, only that you're acting like a mentalist.

> I switched to SNRIs about 2 months ago from Mirtazapine and somedays they seem to do nothing at all. I might actually be feeling worse now then when I wasn't medicated.

What's you're diagnosis? I'm a bi-polar and not a standard melancholic depressive so SSRI/SNRI medications have a near 100% tendency to trigger manic episodes and compulsivity / impulsivity rather than calm me in any way, shape, or form.

Also which SNRI are you on, Venlafaxine? I posted somewhere on here about my dance with that devil of a drug but you seem to be tolerating whatever you're on rather well. Have you tried escitalopram yet? It's still a bastard of a drug but the side effect profile (especially the sexual side effects) tends to be a lot kinder than most other SSRIs and SNRIs.
>> No. 26628 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 10:27 am
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My current diagnosis is mixed anxiety and depression. Currently I'm on duloxitine. I had es-citalopram in the past and the sexual side effects were so bad for me I don't want to ever go back.
>> No. 26629 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 4:48 pm
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> My current diagnosis is mixed anxiety and depression.

So the standard GP "I don't know what I'm doing so I'll just tick the most applicable boxes so I can prescribe the drugs the NHS trust prefers I prescribe" diagnosis, then?

See if you can get a referral to an actual psychiatrist, unless I'm being presumptuous and an actual, very very lazy, psychiatrist actually gave you that (hopefully hypothetical) diagnosis.
>> No. 26630 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 6:57 pm
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There's nothing necessarily wrong with that diagnosis. Generalised anxiety disorder is incredibly common and comes with a substantially higher risk of depression. Avoidance coping is a very common reaction to anxiety, which can set off a depressive cycle of doing less/feeling worse/doing less.

SSRIs, SNRIs and Mirtazapine all have very similar efficacy, so the choice of drug is mainly educated guesswork and often comes down to tolerability of side-effects. Some patients will do better on a TCA or an MAOI, but they're riskier drugs with poorer tolerability so it's eminently sensible to try a few safer drugs first and it's inadvisable to prescribe them in primary care. Unless there's a major manic episode, a psychotic episode or a clear pattern of hypomanic episodes in the patient history, then I'd question the competence of anyone prescribing a mood stabiliser or antipsychotic.

Cost is rarely an issue, because most of the sensible first- and second-line treatment options are off patent.
>> No. 26631 Anonymous
12th May 2018
Saturday 7:33 pm
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There's nothing necessarily wrong with that diagnosis, but nothing essentially right about it either - it's just the easiest least controversial diagnosis that any two bit quack could lazily make in five minutes; "here try these pills if they don't help we'll up the dose until you can't stand the side effects and then we'll swap you over to something else until either something works, the side effects drive you over the edge, or we fry every receptor subtype in your brain".

Duloxetine is also a shitty follow up to Mirtaz... why the fuck would you switch someone from a "lie in bed all day but at least you're not killing yourself drug" straight to a "get out of bed right now you Major Depressive fuck" drug? Now that is a decision that should make you question the competence of whoever this poor chap is working with.

I would never allow a GP to prescribe me psychiatric drugs on a first-line treatment basis just because, statistically, they're the most likely to work. You're fucking with the single most important thing you have - your mind. If even the most specialized psychiatrists are essentially witch doctors then GPs are the tribal soothsayer with a checklist and a list of approved drugs.
>> No. 26632 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 8:08 am
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>So the standard GP "I don't know what I'm doing so I'll just tick the most applicable boxes so I can prescribe the drugs the NHS trust prefers I prescribe" diagnosis, then?

Not at all. I think it is the right diagnosis for me I've had depression on and off for years but recently I've started having neurotic freak outs. (Dredging up old memories that make me uncomfortable for split second bursts)

The only other diagnosis I guess would make sense is PTSD.

When I began seeking treatment for my problems the first time I had private health insurance. I don't think a NHS GP has ever diagnosed me. The most recent shift in diagnosis is a result of talking through my symptoms and past with a psychiatrist for a solid hour.

>Duloxetine is also a shitty follow up to Mirtaz... why the fuck would you switch someone from a "lie in bed all day but at least you're not killing yourself drug" straight to a "get out of bed right now you Major Depressive fuck" drug? Now that is a decision that should make you question the competence of whoever this poor chap is working with.

What's your angle here? I want to be better I requested the change in drug because I was feeling much better and wanted to start living a more meaningful life, it just turned out the new drug doesn't work for me. You've made an awful lot of assumptions here about this being some presumptive GP making it up as they go along. I didn't tell you that. Where is this all coming from lad? It seems like you are projecting something onto me. What's really bothering you here?
>> No. 26645 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 11:02 pm
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> I think it is the right diagnosis for me

How many hypothetical diagnosis cycles have you been through? It took three highly qualified specialist psychiatrists several cycles of almost killing me before we found something which, touch wood, seems to be a valid diagnosis for me and a combination of (currently) five medications that seem to be working for me. Maybe you were just lucky enough to be in the statistical majority. The fact that your medication still isn't right for you suggests that you aren't, though, and that your case is probably more complex than you hope.

>> >Duloxetine is also a shitty follow up to Mirtaz...
> What's your angle here?

That your doctor is shitty. Jumping you from Mirtaz to Duloxetine is like taking you from morphine to meth without trying codeine or caffeine or anything else along the way.

> I want to be better I requested the change in drug because I was feeling much better and wanted to start living a more meaningful life, it just turned out the new drug doesn't work for me.

That doesn't make sense, if you were feeling much better why would ask for a change in drug? Because you were too sleepy? Well sometimes that's the way the cookie crumbles. My own meds make me shit myself every two hours but if I come off them I'll probably be dead within two weeks, so I eat a box of Immodium a day and try to eat more fiber. You deal with the most important things things first. I, for example won't take anything that interferes with my ability to do sport and exercise - without those all my symptoms get worse, medication or no medication.

>You've made an awful lot of assumptions here about this being some presumptive GP making it up as they go along. I didn't tell you that.

It's called "reading between the lines" and what's we non-autists do in order to pick up on subtle details that people don't necessarily want or feel are necessary to spell out. Admittedly it works better in person than across the Internet, especially where mental health in involved.

>Where is this all coming from lad?

It seems we're heading into cunt off land because, instead of insulting your missus or keying your car, I've slagged off your doctor and the change in medication he's prescribed. There's nothing much of anything coming from anywhere other than one person who's been fucked around by psychiatrists being concerned about another human being who seems to be having a hard time with psychiatrists (or worse, a GP with a checklist, you still haven't been specific about that).

I won't quote or respond to the rest of your post because it's the same sort of bollocks I spit out when I'm angry and in pain too, and to be quite frank this isn't the time or the place.

If I've touched a sore nerve I apologize and I wish you all the best in your future treatments, but I will reiterate one last time - if you are seeing a GP and you end up on a third medication that still isn't perfect, go and see a real psychiatric specialist, not some piano dentist who'll keep you feeling like a couple of fortnights in a bad balloon.
>> No. 26647 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 11:42 pm
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At the point that you are telling me I'm autistic because the assumptions you've made about me and my situation are wrong, you probably shouldn't be posting in emo and have clearly crossed the line of constructive posting.

It is terrible that you have to take so many meds and that you have been misdiagnosed so much, but it isn't a competition, and isn't relevant to my situation. If you have pain you want to share by all means share it. Don't use me as a proxy for the axe you grind though.
>> No. 26648 Anonymous
13th May 2018
Sunday 11:51 pm
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>That your doctor is shitty. Jumping you from Mirtaz to Duloxetine is like taking you from morphine to meth without trying codeine or caffeine or anything else along the way.

This statement is obviously nonsense to anyone with even a rudimentary understanding of psychopharmacology. I don't know what your problem is or what agenda you're trying to push, but you're not helping the situation.
>> No. 26655 Anonymous
14th May 2018
Monday 4:27 am
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> At the point that you are telling me I'm autistic because the assumptions you've made about me and my situation are wrong...

You haven't been clear about your situation, and it's obvious that your current medication isn't working, so anyone wanting to offer any advice beyond a shoulder to cry on has to read between the lines and make certain assumptions. The autism comment was perhaps too glib and didn't belong in /emo/ and I apologize for that.

Also don't worry about me lad, I've whinged enough on here to last several lifetimes, I'm not trying to one up you in the Who's The Most Mental Mentallad on Britfa challenge but as I said your medication clearly isn't right for you so it's quite likely that you're being mis-prescribed and/or misdiagnosed.

The fact that (presumably) you mentioned "mood stabalisers" in one post, and then said "then I switched from mirtaz to SSRIs" two posts later shows that something isn't quite right. An SSRI is certainly not a mood stabaliser and will patently make conditions that need mood stablisers worse (although for you it seems to be having little effect at all, which is better than an adverse effect, I suppose).

There's not much more to say, really as any other suggestion I make seems to upset you further which far from what I want.

>This statement is obviously nonsense to anyone with even a rudimentary understanding of psychopharmacology

It's illustratively hyperbolic and nothing more. If you like we can cunt off about the pharmacology of various generations and subtypes of antidepressants on /lab/ or /A/ or somewhere more apt.

Also why does overly self-defensive wannabe cunt-off starter shoe-horn the idea of "pushing an agenda" into every discussion? What possible "agenda" could I be wanting to "push"? Do you think I've come from Big Pharma to convince a bunch of Tea and Shed enthusiasts into buy my companies latest patented brain-fixer, because I'm not.

I have no "agenda" to "push" nor "bag of spuds" and indeed no purpose in this discussion that to try to help a lad whose medication clearly isn't working by applying my own personal experience of being prescribed plenty of medication that sometimes didn't work, and sometimes made things even worse. Nothing more, nothing less.

As said lad doesn't want my help or advice I won't be replying to any more posts on the subject and will leave the lad to his own devices and wish him all the best and a speedy recovery. That is all.
>> No. 26719 Anonymous
29th May 2018
Tuesday 5:43 pm
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>go check on your very first ex

No, brain, that's blatantly stupid.

>just go look at her facebook

No, the fuck is wrong with you. I already know how this will end.

>just do it, you know you want to

Look, fine, but it's your fault when it turns out she's fit as fuck nowadays and the rest our week is spent in sheer bitter ennui.

>it's her biiirthdaaaay
>and she's fit as fuck, look at her
>and she's still into all the same stuff as you
>she's perfect, you're such a dickhead

Yeah. Thanks. Prick.
>> No. 26721 Anonymous
29th May 2018
Tuesday 8:44 pm
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pic unrelated.png
I've just realised the seriousness of a health condition I'm being tested for.

At the beginning of the month I had an MRI scan to test for primary biliary cholangitis (PBC). I was a bit worried but the consultant kind of downplayed it, suggesting he was just ruling it out, and that it wasn't that likely that it was serious. It's a liver condition but when I asked he didn't say I needed to stop drinking alcohol, just that I should maybe drink a bit less than I do on the weekends. As such I didn't think too much about it, as it didn't seem like I needed to worry - if it was serious they surely should have said by now, right?

After a boozy bank holiday weekend my skin has been feeling a bit itchy, which is one of the symptoms of PBC. I decided to have more of a read about PBC, discovering that diagnoses are 95% accurate through a type of blood test, which I assume I've already tested positively for, hence the MRI.

So I ended up googling "PBC life expectancy", to which Google told me: "The average survival from diagnosis for a patient with PBC who is asymptomatic is 16 years, while that of patients with symptoms is 7 1/2 years."

I'm 25 years old. So it looks like there's a high chance I won't even make it to 40.

On discovering this my body feels weak and I'm not sure how I'm supposed to carry on with my life with such knowledge. This is not a nice feeling.

I want to take a valium to forget about it but I don't think that will be good for my liver.
>> No. 26722 Anonymous
29th May 2018
Tuesday 9:23 pm
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If the diagnosis is confirmed, I'd strongly recommend getting in touch with a support group. Chronic and life-limiting conditions are really tough to deal with, but it's a bit easier if you have the support of people in the same boat. I've got a fairly serious cardiac condition and I was absolutely terrified when I first got my diagnosis. Joining a support group didn't take away that fear, but it made it easier to deal with.

I can't speak for everyone, but I went through an absolutely textbook five stages of grief when I got my diagnosis. My own mortality suddenly became a lot more real when it had a definite timeframe. Eventually, I just got used to the idea. There was no epiphany, no sudden moment of being at peace with it, just a gradual return to feeling normal. I realised that it doesn't actually make much difference if you've got fifty years left or ten, you just get up in the morning and get on with your life. I cashed out my pension and spunked it on a few nice holidays, but otherwise nothing has really changed.

Good luck mate.

>> No. 26726 Anonymous
31st May 2018
Thursday 10:21 am
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Got stood up for a date last night. I'm not angry. More perplexed.

Was it always considered socially acceptable to not explain your actions or is this a new development?

I imagine the avoidance of the responsibliy of confrontation of awkward situations out of cowardice to be a modern 'millennial' problem but I might be fooling myself.
>> No. 26727 Anonymous
31st May 2018
Thursday 11:21 am
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My life's going down the shitter. Being evicted, so had to find a new house fast. Found one, it's a bit of a shithole, but it was the only place that would allow a cat. Had to use all my savings and borrow money off mine and my partner's family to afford the £1500 to move. Now I'm broke, can't afford stuff we need for the house like a fridge, and I've gotten really ill. Too ill to work, but on a zero hours contract so not like I can get signed off and get sick pay. Every night all I can think about is killing myself. I feel like obstacles keep coming up and it's not worth living anymore. At least if I'm dead I don't have to deal with all this tedious shit.
>> No. 26728 Anonymous
31st May 2018
Thursday 12:55 pm
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If your situation is really that dire take it to the left wing rags. They'll fucking love you as an example of broken tory Britain. They'll give you cash for the story so win win.
>> No. 26729 Anonymous
31st May 2018
Thursday 6:43 pm
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Ah if only I could be as cynical as you.
>> No. 26730 Anonymous
1st June 2018
Friday 6:12 pm
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What's the point in the crisis team? I phoned them and told them I'm hearing voices and I'm suicidal, they told me that I should write down my problems as that'll help me overcome them.
>> No. 26731 Anonymous
1st June 2018
Friday 7:25 pm
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Imagine a piece of toast the size of Birmingham. Try buttering it with one of those tiny packets of butter you get with a hotel breakfast. "Spread thin" is too meagre a phrase for the state of mental health services at the moment.

I see all sorts of mental health awareness stuff in the media, with various celebrities imploring us to seek help if we're struggling. When you actually try to get that help, it all starts to seem like a sick joke.
>> No. 26733 Anonymous
1st June 2018
Friday 10:19 pm
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Maybe "seek help if you are struggling" means "seek help if you are struggling, but be prepared to pay 50 quids at hour for it".
>> No. 26734 Anonymous
1st June 2018
Friday 10:29 pm
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I'm all about that suicide vibe too, but did you actually try? I'm not saying it will work, but you never know.
>> No. 26735 Anonymous
2nd June 2018
Saturday 12:20 am
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That kind of reads like you want him to try suicide.
>> No. 26858 Anonymous
16th June 2018
Saturday 8:41 pm
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I didn't sign up for this whole "existing" thing. I can't say I like it all that much; I know it's no great revelation but you do things you hate so you can survive to do more things you hate.

All day I've had a crushing sense of doom and despair and I don't really know why.

I want a drink to take my mind off it, but I've had a drink for the last two nights in a row and feel that a third really wouldn't be appropriate.
>> No. 26859 Anonymous
16th June 2018
Saturday 9:16 pm
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I think I'm going to kill someone. Just go out and stab a random stranger. At this point it seems like the only way to get help for my mental health. I've had six years of being tossed around on various waiting lists, tried a whole bunch of medication, tried all sorts of changes to my life. But nothing is working. I can't live like this anymore.
>> No. 26861 Anonymous
16th June 2018
Saturday 10:22 pm
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Don't stab anyone. Take about 10 valium, you'll live, but phone the NHS helpline and tell them you've overdosed and taken more than that and you're going to kill yourself. An ambulance will come and the Paramedics will assess you. Tell them you want to die and why, tell them you can't see a way out, tell them you were at a bridge earlier in the evening and the only thing that pulled you back from the edge was thoughts of family.

You'll get taken in. Repeat for the assessing Nurse and the on call Psychiatrist, respectively. When they ask you what you'll do if you leave, say shoot yourself. They'll ask where you will get a gun, say it's easy and you can get a hot sawn-off for £50. What does it matter to you if it is linked to crime, you're going to deepthroat it. You'll get offered a bed in their secure mental health wing, take it.

You'll spend a month or so in there and it could save your life in the future, as you'll speak to a Psychiatrist and a psychologist as well as having a named Nurse you can go to. 3 squares a day, as much squash as you can drink and they'll let you keep your phone. When you get a bed, let us know where you are. You might find one of us is close by, I would visit you for sure. We'll sort something out.

/emo/ has helped me loads over the years, I doubt I'm the only one who would be interested in paying that forward. Same goes for you, >>26858.

Take care, lads.
>> No. 26862 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 12:14 am
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> I didn't sign up for this whole "existing" thing. I can't say I like it all that much

I very, very much know how you feel, lad - and I also know how people treat you like a whining little bastard for expressing such "teenlad" or "edgy" feelings.

I don't know where the actual phrase comes from but it gets bandied about in a "Peanuts" cartoon meme that says something like "I think about life and I think about death, and neither really appeals to me".

As a staunch anti-natalist I honestly thought I was set for life just drinking and drugging myself faster and ever faster towards the abyss until the thrill of speed overcame the fear of death and the dying of the light became but the snuffing of the candle, but no.

> I want a drink to take my mind off it, but I've had a drink for the last two nights in a row and feel that a third really wouldn't be appropriate.

I've gone down that road many times and it works, until it doesn't, then you move onto something else which works, until it also doesn't. People talk about alcoholism and drug addiction as progressive incurable diseases but no one really says the same about the meta-mechanics of what leads someone to start down the path in the first place, but I digress.

Suffice to say that suicide by installments works fine until you either fall in love or some heartless bitch drops the responsibility of staying alive in order to be some kind of decent dad to a kid that you expressly never wanted. Then you're fucked.

Sage, because I'm rambling, because I don't really have any answers, and I'm not really sure if your post even had any questions.
>> No. 26863 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 1:23 am
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> and I also know how people treat you like a whining little bastard for expressing such "teenlad" or "edgy" feelings.
I tell myself the same thing. But, at the same time, they aren't wrong. I'm not writing some edgelord manifesto, just expressing the truth. I really didn't ask to be brought into existence, and really wish I hadn't been.

>I've gone down that road many times and it works, until it doesn't,

I succumbed today, and had a couple of cans. Not enough to get me smashed, but enough to take the edge off. I'm worried because now I'm aware enough that what I'm doing is destructive, but I don't know long that will last for.

>Suffice to say that suicide by installments works fine until you either fall in love or some heartless bitch drops the responsibility of staying alive in order to be some kind of decent dad to a kid that you expressly never wanted. Then you're fucked.

That sounds awful. I'd hate to bring another human into the suffering that we call life.
>> No. 26864 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 1:26 am
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I didn't see your quote before making my reply. I'm too much of a pussy (and, I suppose, of sound-ish mind) to do anything that would require an extra burden on the NHS.

I want to see the world, or at least get off this godforsaken island before making any... decisions.
>> No. 26869 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 12:16 pm
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Immigrant lad here.

This forsaken island is quite crappy, but the rest of Europe is not in a better shape. Save yourself the trouble, if you are not very rich the world is more or less the same crap everywhere.
>> No. 26870 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 12:51 pm
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The average starting salary for my chosen career path in certain foreign climes is considerably higher than here. I'm going to give that a shot as soon as it's practical.
>> No. 26874 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 1:22 pm
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Believe me, an higher salary is not going to help much in a place where nothing works properly and where there are many problems that will affect you (criminality, unsafe environment, pollution, overcrowding and so on).
>> No. 26875 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 2:23 pm
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None of those things are true in Australia - win win, too. Either I go there and do well or I get taken out by a murderous spider/cassowary/kangaroo.
>> No. 26876 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 2:44 pm
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As long as you are qualified enough to get a working VISA and have no fear of Catachan wildlife, go ahead.

PS: don't mention the emu war.
>> No. 26880 Anonymous
17th June 2018
Sunday 8:08 pm
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I think I got away with it.
>> No. 26892 Anonymous
23rd June 2018
Saturday 2:30 am
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Why am I like this
>> No. 26893 Anonymous
24th June 2018
Sunday 2:05 am
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>> No. 26894 Anonymous
24th June 2018
Sunday 2:07 am
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Becausr you're a stupid mentalist.

Get a job you lazy fucker.

(A good day to you Sir!)
>> No. 26895 Anonymous
24th June 2018
Sunday 5:07 pm
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I need to talk to someone but feel like I'm constantly burdening everyone with my pathetic, inane shit.

Nobody wants to hear about the fact I can't deal with situations like the adult I am.

I even feel like a burden posting it here on an anonymous imageboard.

I wish I wasn't such a pussy and had the courage to do what needs to be done.
>> No. 26896 Anonymous
24th June 2018
Sunday 5:17 pm
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Talking to us here will never be a burden, I can promise you that. It's why this board exists. Please talk to us, I'd consider it a favour rather than a burden.
>> No. 26897 Anonymous
24th June 2018
Sunday 5:32 pm
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The Samaritans are ready to listen to whatever you have to say. The number is 116 123. It's free to call from any phone and they're avail