|>>|| No. 2860
'Sup /gays/, I have 2 questions for you (second plural.)
Optional back story, feel free to skip to the end: I'm what you might consider a man's man. I'm an engineer, my hands are like sand paper, I listen to thrash metal and have given myself a poorly executed tattoo while pissed up in a foreign country.
Being as I am, a bit of a lad, I don't normally bother with such irrelevancies as one might be familiar with on this board. However, I have trouble attracting women, in order to sort this issue the fuck out and get my dick wet I feel I need to probably pander to womens shallow desires.
Therefore I come to you "lads" with two topics:
(1) "Fragrances for men".
I normally smell of a combination of stale piss, cigarettes, coffee and excrement, to be brutally honest I'm pretty ok with that but I heard women like guys to smell as if they've been looked in a hookers parlor for a few days. I would say "wat do" or something but I'm not a complete pork product. Should I, or should I not fork out the monetary equivalent of 10 pints just on the off chance that it will appease women? If yes, have you got any recommendations on what I should blow the aforementioned cash on.
And thusly, (2):
I have to shave. Now fuck knows I hate this, 'tis a burden 'pon my soul and try as I might to avoid the blasted action, there comes a point where I simply have to concede defeat to the hair and have a shave.
So immediately post shave, I am feeling pretty good since I know I can put it off for anywhere between 1 day and a week depending on who or what the fuck I am doing. However, 30 minutes later my skin has become as dry and flakey as a stoned university maths student. I have attempted to counteract this by shaving post-shower and immediately applying post-shave something called "Gilette energizing moisture". Unfortunately, unlike Ronsil it does not do exactly what it says on the fucking tin. My skin is as dry and shite as it was before and I feel positively drained by the entire experience.
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