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|>>|| No. 23560
We tend to have a lot of repeated threads here, but I also get the feeling people don't tend to post in /emo/ unless it's a big issue.
With this in mind I suggest that we have a thread for stuff that's got you down a bit and you need to get off your chest, without it being major enough to make an entire thread devoted to it. We can also use it as a go-to for minor relationship advice, work problems, social drama, and things like that.
Everyone gets down from time to time, let's put some Sisters of Mercy on and wallow together for a while.
|>>|| No. 24920
I'd just like to say my cunt brain is doing alright at the minute.
|>>|| No. 24923
Self-neglect and low motivation are big warning signs for depression. Get yourself to the GP.
|>>|| No. 24925
The doctor tried to tell me I was depressed for these reasons, so I had to remind him that not only am I already on an antidepressant for anxiety, I suffer from chronic back and joint pain and told him if he gave me better painkillers I'd shower more than was absolutely necessary to keep my wife from leaving me.
I shaved recently for the first time in about a year and had to use scissors on it first, because I was going to a wedding. Up until that point I couldn't be arsed because it really hurt my arm and wrist and my wife liked it... for a bit. She started offering to shave it for me, but I was too proud, but eventually conceded the moustache because she threatened to stop having sex with me so she was trimming it with a beard trimmer every time it got "scratchy".
It's all about perspective, both of those things apply to me but I'm pretty OK mentally.
|>>|| No. 24926
Cognitive Behavoural Therapy can be really useful for chronic pain. It won't make the pain better, but it can make it easier to live with. Have you ever been referred to a pain clinic or the Expert Patients Programme?
|>>|| No. 24927
Yeah, the Pain Clinic are fucking heroes. They gave me my first TENS machine and put me on pre-gabalin (which is cracking stuff).
The nurses have good chat and tolerance for swearing, first time I went they gave me a form with pictures of the body and told me to highlight were it hurt. I highlighted the whole thing and handed it back to him and he was just like "...fair enough. You want to sit in my desk chair, these seat are shit?" I sat in the chair.
|>>|| No. 25026
I care more about the people I'm employed to look after than myself. Much more. They are fantastic, and I have no idea why I'm still here.
|>>|| No. 25030
I feel as though my time with .gs may be drawing to a close, and it's making me sad.
I've been frequenting this place from what feels like (because it probably has been) my entire adult life. It's been my "thing" that I keep to myself and don't need to tell anyone about, a nice morning scroll with a cuppa and a cig. But it's just not really as cathartic or relaxing as it used to be, and it makes me feel rather melancholic. Either the demographic has changed, or my tastes have changed, but the discussion here isn't what it once was.
I don't mean this post as one of those ridiculous attention seeking farewell post, I suppose I'm just feeling rather sentimental about drifting away from something that has actually been a pretty big part of my life. I don't like change. Growing old is scary.
All the best anyway lads.
|>>|| No. 25031
>drifting away from something that has actually been a pretty big part of my life.
Now that's depressing.
|>>|| No. 25033
I really hate summer. Makes me very depressed.
I wish I could die every year and be reborn anew.
|>>|| No. 25076
Sometimes, when I'm squeezing out the last few squirts of a piss, a little nugget of shit pops out and nestles between my arse cheeks.
I'm not sure what distresses me most. The fact I can't really feel that nugget of shit is there first, the fact that it's quite awkward if it happens at a standing urinal, the fact my arse is apparently loose enough that a gentle squeeze forces it out, or the fact that I have that one solitary nugget lurking around even when I've had a massive dump just a few hours prior.
|>>|| No. 25077
Eat more fibre and start doing pelvic floor exercises. Yes, men do have a pelvic floor.
|>>|| No. 25078
I know what you mean.
We peaked with Are Moaty. These days I'm visiting more out of habit than out of expectation I'll find something likely to cause mirth. The enthusiasm has gone. There's a small band of people determined to suck the fun out of everything and reduce most threads to pointless bickering, even when they're agreeing with each other. I know that's always been there but in the past it's generally been drowned out whereas nowadays we can go an entire weekend with only a dozen or so posts, none of them in the actual weekend thread.
Sage for meta.
|>>|| No. 25079
I think this is just the feeling of loving Britfa, but not being in love with Britfa.
|>>|| No. 25080
Maybe we should try a date-night, have a think about how we might spice things up in the bedroom too.
|>>|| No. 25081
I've bought a couple of magazines. Maybe we can try this underwear? I don't know.
|>>|| No. 25085
Does anyone know if there's a kind of careers/life advice service available for adults. In the past year or so my mind has got so cloudy and I struggle conceptualise things properly and as I result I feel a bit stuck. I have lots of ideas of things I want/wish to do but I can't quite get it together or explain it.
I always feel so overwhelmed at the moment but I don't really have anything to feel overwhelmed at (that I can think of). I also feel I've lost alot of my abilities - hence why this post is probably full of grammatical errors.
I'm only (or already) 26 and I feel very stuck. Just feel like I need to have a deep and constructive conversation with someone lads.
|>>|| No. 25086
I'm just popping in to say that yes, life coaches are a thing, but someone else may have more specific advice like which ones are scams.
|>>|| No. 25087
Yeah I had a look into life coaches in the area but they seemed like scams, or at least a waste of money.
|>>|| No. 25088
I've been feeling in a similar funk lately but although I always say this here writing it out (my life goals) really helped put things back into order last night. I think the only person who can really sort your life out is you.
Open notepad and write out short, medium and long term goals which consider the person you want to be and the life you want to have. No need to write a crazy timetable but think about the kind of person you are and what would make you happy.
|>>|| No. 25089
All I've done recently it try to plot out where I'd be headed on my current path, try thinking about that a bit.
In my case I've decided to go back to uni and study something I enjoy (and that is coincidentally fairly useful to have a degree in). I have doubts even now, with the academic year creeping up on me, but it helps to look at what I could be doing instead.
I currently work for minimum wage in a fast food restaurant, and having little meaningful prior experience I'm unlikely to have any other opportunities easily available to me unless I work for them.
Being over 21 and a responsible adult I had the sad realisation that aside from maybe having kids eventually (unlikely since I'm chronically single) that I'm just going to be working from now until, well, longer than I can really conceptualise.
So uni it is, in the hopes of getting an actual career. I don't fancy being a fast food manager when reaching a salaried role would probably take as long as doing a degree.
|>>|| No. 25090
I have used apps called Talkspace and Coach.Me. If you spend a moment searching for the right person, they can be excellent. Both are paid subscriptions but have been really worth it to me.
|>>|| No. 25091
Dating is shit. Socialising is shit. I keep trying but nobody seems to follow it up when I initiate things. Feels lonely.
|>>|| No. 25092
I'm in a similar situation too. Hence the Saturday night .gs. Solidarity.
I think I felt fulfilled last week. I felt like I was developing new friendships, I felt like I had opportunities with girls. But now everyone seems to have abandoned me and now doesn't seem interested in giving me any time.
I went on a date last night which a girl who I thought I had a good chance with, but like most of my dates, it ended with nothing more than a hug. There's either something about me IRL which makes me romantically unappealing or I'm misreading signs and should be going for a kiss anyway. I remember after one date a girl said "you're supposed to kiss me" after I hugged her goodnight so I really don't know how these things work.
|>>|| No. 25107
Just go for the kiss. It's better to be rebuffed than wonder "what if?". A faint heart never won a fair maid and all that.
Don't lunge at a stranger on the bus, obviously. That's a sex crime.
|>>|| No. 25111
Definitely always go for the kiss, unless she clearly isn't into you at all. If it's a date, always with the kiss.
|>>|| No. 25147
I'm a 28 year old 'NEET', overweight and lead a very inactive lifesytle. I barely engage in my interests outside of playing games on the computer. It wouldn't take a great deal of effort to change this but I lack the meaning and enthusiasm to do so at the moment.
Is it unrealistic for me to connect with another person online with the view of forming an offline relationship? I don't think I'd mind helping someone else out of a hole similar to mine, mutual support, but I can barely think anyone would do it for me seeing as I do so little for myself. How can I possibly say all this without selling myself short - "If you're looking for a project, I'm your man"?
It reminds me of tha Guardians of the Galaxy trailer; "You've just got to find somebody as pathetic as you are". Well, where and how can I find her? Wouldn't a relationship borne of this end in failure, anyway?
|>>|| No. 25148
First of all, you're going to need to develop some outside interests that don't involve sitting in front of the PC 13 hours a day. Second, you need to start taking some responsibility for yourself; you're not a 'NEET' - you're unemployed. You're not a 'project' - by your own definition you're not presenting an attractive prospect to a potential partner so, unless they're equally desperate, why the hell should anyone else do the same for you? You're not going to like this answer, maybe because you think it's a generic, 'pull your socks up' Dad-like argument but stop fucking moping, get a job, make some friends, lose some bloody weight and do something for yourself instead of wallowing in self-pity. No ones going to do it for you, mate. Once you get that in place, you'll find meeting someone a piss of piece.
|>>|| No. 25151
>If you're looking for a project, I'm your man"?
For you to be the project of a woman you have to have some sort of halo effect that overrides your obvious failings. You know like you are very handsome and has a 60k estate car but you also want to systematically eradicate the Jewish people sort of thing. I don't think that is your option if you are the kind of decent mild mannered NEET I imagine you to be, unless you can play yourself off as some sort of brilliant soulful poet or writer who cares too much about your art to sell out and get a job.
>Is it unrealistic for me to connect with another person online with the view of forming an offline relationship?
I met my GF through an online dating site, apart from the fact that I met her I would say it is a completely awful experience that I wouldn't recommend to anyone.
The only way you are going to meet new people is by finding ways to interact with new people. If playing games is a closed system where you don't meet or talk to anyone new then you don't stand a chance without some form of change. Which is something you already know but I like to think hearing that from someone else helps.
|>>|| No. 25153
Nevermind the two lads above me mate. Get on Plenty Of Fish with your most flattering selfies, try to sell yourself as if you at least have SOME redeeming factors, and you can have a slightly overweight mental perma-NEET slag like my ex in only a few weeks. It helps if you have the ability to cater to crazy daddy-issue BDSM fetishes too.
I remember it quite fondly; we were both unemployed, whittling our overdrafts away on Amber Leaf and Space Raiders, reliant on overly generous parents who didn't mind us spending all day watching Doctor Who and shagging. Difference is I eventually got my act together, whereas it turned out she was likely destined to be one of those lost cause lifetime doleys.
Being unemployed and useless at life is actually an advantage on dating sites. There's a vast underclass of 18 to 20-something chubby lasses who still live between their divorcee parents and the job centre ripe for the taking if you have a similar schedule of fuck all to do with your time. It's a numbers game and the more time you have to spend on it, the better off you are.
Since I got a decent job, sorted my life out, and have things to actually do with my time, I find it much harder to get a shag than I used to. Not only have my standards increased substantially since my hesitant, shaky early 20s, but carrying on the conversation and flirtation needed to bag a Tinder slag is something I can't find time to commit to these days. Especially with my damn girlfriend taking up so much of my fucking time. It's going to be even worse when she moves in with me.
|>>|| No. 25155
This. However, if you're going to take selfies take them outside.
Women love pictures of you actually doing something. Go on a ramble, walk a dog, go somewhere scenic.
|>>|| No. 25156
Wow, I'm glad I'm just in a shallow pool of melancholy and not the actively manic and frequently delusional head space I was at a month ago, otherwise I might have done something properly mental (like expecting IAPT to have helped me).
|>>|| No. 25158
Not thatlad but I find POF to be nigh on impossible to use. It's a cluster fuck of horrible design and misleading links.
|>>|| No. 25159
It's the online equivalent of a shitty provincial nightclub. Nobody really wants to be there, the ambience is awful, but you're pretty much guaranteed to get your hole. If you want the online equivalent of a shitty provincial indie club, try OKCupid - there's a slightly better class of woman, but don't they just know it.
|>>|| No. 25161
Been on OKC for many years but I'm an ugly, slightly overweight (but not obese) autist with crippling social anxiety and hence completely unable to get a conversation going with anyone. I barely ever get replies. I hoped it would take the biggest hurdle for me out of the whole dating thing, which is telling if someone is interested in you, but all it seems to have done is confirm that no-one is actually interested.
Sage for the wrong thread to be saying this in.
|>>|| No. 25162
Plenty of Fish is full of single mothers looking for a meal ticket. If you can tolerate that sort of thing then you could end up, like the bloke on Naked Attraction last night, punching well above your weight.
It's also why the place is rife with paedos.
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