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|>>|| No. 23560
We tend to have a lot of repeated threads here, but I also get the feeling people don't tend to post in /emo/ unless it's a big issue.
With this in mind I suggest that we have a thread for stuff that's got you down a bit and you need to get off your chest, without it being major enough to make an entire thread devoted to it. We can also use it as a go-to for minor relationship advice, work problems, social drama, and things like that.
Everyone gets down from time to time, let's put some Sisters of Mercy on and wallow together for a while.
|>>|| No. 26414
What is this, 1988. Who says bonk nowadays.
-11 is right, workplace relationships are generally a living nightmare - when they happen you have almost no choice or free will in the matter. If it was going to happen by now, it would have.
|>>|| No. 26426
Cyclists and some other, lesser sportspeople use 'bonk' to mean when you run out of energy so badly you hit 'the wall'.
I really wish they wouldn't.
|>>|| No. 26484
Increasingly I am thinking this will only end one way.
|>>|| No. 26548
Always goes the same way:
Meet someone new, have interesting conversation, I BECOME A SOCIALLY RETARDED CUNT and fuck it up. Every time. Every. Fucking. Time.
Christ. I never thought I'd have as much seething, white-hot hatred for myself as I do yet not do anything about it. I would have liked to think of myself as pragmatic but I'm even a useless cunt at that.
|>>|| No. 26549
Ooh, get you, me from three weeks back, talking big like you're gonna' do shit. Slit or get off the pot, loser.
|>>|| No. 26550
Women are just men with tits, lad. When you get into that mindset, they're easier to talk to. You stop thinking things like "I need to impress her" and start thinking and accepting things like "I mean, we both probably like sex. I'll bring the subject up at a more appropriate time. Meanwhile, I bet she'll like this article."
|>>|| No. 26552
>We're both bloody good blokes, unlike that Turkish shepherd who chewed off his own knackers.
|>>|| No. 26556
>women are just men with tuts.
That is fundamentally not true. They are strange vain creatures that resemble men and are concerned with something they call 'feelings'. You try having a bit of friendly rivalry and ribbing like you do with the lads and watch how badly and quickly their ego bruises. Don't get me wrong they are fully realised three dimensional people but they aren't like men with tits you can't treat them the same unless you and your male friends are all metrosexuals.
|>>|| No. 26557
Who said it was just women I struggle to have normal conversations with? I don't even realise what I'm doing til after the damage is done.
I don't think you can use such broad strokes, lad.
|>>|| No. 26558
>I don't think you can use such broad strokes.
I'm sorry, you are right. I take back what I said about them being fully realised three dimensional people. It was unfair of me to presume they all are.
|>>|| No. 26561
We are not trying to talk someone down from the ledge we are trying to get foot in the mouth lad laid. Have a bit of perspective. The entire drive of the conversation is to get someone 'fucking about'.
|>>|| No. 26563
In the same week that someone murdered a bunch of people because they had a warped perception of women don't you dare try and suggest it isn't important.
|>>|| No. 26564
Unless you believe OP is about to murder some women because of the content of this thread I suggest you both stop shitting up a perfectly good /emo/ thread. Take it to one of the many ongoing sexism discussions open elsewhere on the site.
|>>|| No. 26566
>I suggest you both stop shitting up a perfectly good /emo/ thread
If you read my post that's what I'm asking him to stop doing. /emo/ is not the place to talk about how you think women are all the same.
|>>|| No. 26567
People need help with all sorts of emotional and psychological problems and there is no set way to discuss them beyond being supportive, stop being a tedious bore.
|>>|| No. 26568
I also think women are more or less all the same. It's not an insult, we don't have to all be special flowers.
|>>|| No. 26597
It'd be nice to have at least one parent who didn't need to be pissed by early evening just to get through a day.
|>>|| No. 26598
I don't mean to belittle your problem but I've days, weeks, where I've needed two bottles of wine to get out of bed in the morning. If you think that your parents are developing a problem maybe take the more open minded one (if they exist) and take them to an AA meeting.
The first half is all bollocks about 12 steps some idiots from Ohio of all places dreamt up almost a hundred years ago about how to be a perfect human or whatever, it's essentially a cult. (Getting slightly off topic here but.... ) Some people need that cult and even though they haven't had a drink for 20 years they keep on turning up every day to these fucking meetings trying to perform these 12 steps and rid themselves of their thetans oh wait wrong cult....
But the second hour is sharing hour and you can talk about problems you have with your drinking, if you've drunk recently, how long you're sober if you are. I like to talk about how my father was an alcoholic bastard and how I go into a fugue state when I go into a supermarket to buy a bottle of coke zero and a sandwhich and suddenly come to in the alcohol aisle.
Anyway, most people reject AA out of hand due to the cultish aspects, which is kind of sad because there are actually useful aspects to it. What I'm trying to say is if one of your parents comes, turn up an hour late; they don't have to speak, they can just listen to other people and maybe they'll hear things from other people that they recognize in themselves or maybe not. But it'd have to be worth an hour of anyone's time if they might possibly be developing a drinking issue? Even if they never go again just getting some perspective by hearing the stories of people who didn't get a little temperance together can be a great thing.
Sage for long rambling post.
|>>|| No. 26599
Not sure if this is the right thread to post this in, but I'm beginning to learn that women don't react well to being 'ghosted'.
The other day I bumped into a girl I had apparently ghosted after sleeping with her twice. We ended up spending the day together, by virtue of doing the same activity. She was telling me that she enjoyed the time we had spent together before I'd ghosted her, and when I suggested we did stuff again, she said we can do it as friends, but that the ~moment's gone~ and I wouldn't get to fuck her, which I thought was a weird thing to say.
Anyway, we ended up drinking with my mates, who told me she was obviously still into me. After a few pints we got the bus home and ended up snogging and all of that stuff. The next day she texts me saying she shouldn't have kissed me, that she's not looking for anything serious, and that she doesn't think we're 'compatible' (still not sure I know what 'compatible' feels like, but I guess that's a topic for a whole other emo thread).
Incidentally, I got in touch with another girl who I'd had a date with a few weeks ago, which ended up with snogging and us agreeing to hang out again. She also told me the "window of opportunity had passed" because my response time had been really slow, and then blocked me on Whatsapp.
I had always been led to believed that women's interest in a person increased if they were not available - 'treat them mean, keep them keen' etc. But I am only just learning that this is not necessarily the case.
|>>|| No. 26600
You don't ghost people you want to fuck, you be vague, keep in contact and stay flirty. You still have to remain in contact or their heads turn. A simple adjustment is all you need, who told you ghosting women was a good idea for anything other than avoiding someone you had a regrettable one night stand with? That's misguided PUA nonsense, lad.
|>>|| No. 26603
I've accidentally attracted women more by giving up on them. If they're playing hard to get or being coy or just clearly not that arsed with you, and you stop replying to them, they either forget about you and that's that, or they go FUCKING MENTAL because they're not used to being brushed off.
I suspect it only works with the very, very pretty ones/narcissists.
|>>|| No. 26604
It's all about the push / pull m8. Even the femenists figured that one out back when they wrote "men are from mars...."
"The moment has passed" means, as they say in Brazil, "A fila anda" - in other words you missed your chance and she's taking another fucker's length.
|>>|| No. 26605
Yeah a similar thing happened to me a while ago. I went on a couple of dates with this girl, but even though we enjoyed hanging out I didn't feel like like there were any sparks flying and to be honest I felt like she was wasting my time a bit. I didn't message her for 3 or 4 weeks and she didn't message me either so I thought she wasn't that into me. But after that we bumped into each other at a party and very quickly left together. Sometimes you just need to apply enough alcohol to the problem.
|>>|| No. 26606
It's an old septic joke but British people don't date, and we shouldn't try to emulate our transatlantic cousins at it; we simply get sambuccad up and throw ourselves at each other.
|>>|| No. 26615
I've been on a bunch of dates recently but never get as far as progressing things beyond a second meeting. The latest one has just ghosted me after saying they wanted to hang out again. Don't get what I'm doing wrong really. Is it inevitable to go through this much rejection as a guy?
|>>|| No. 26618
I think so, mate. I've been through the same thing, including the old 'I'd love to see you again once I return from my fifty-year mission to the Phantom Zone' trick. But now I'm in a happy long-term relationship. Don't take it personally and just keep trying, you'll eventually find someone you click with.
|>>|| No. 26619
>Is it inevitable to go through this much rejection as a guy?
Pretty much. I think pre-tinder era, you got more of an explanation/polite rejection IRL, but these days people seem fine just disappearing.
It's frustrating as it's hard to know if you're doing something wrong that you could improve, or if you've just been a bit unlucky, and I'm not just saying this to be nice - it's likely the latter.
|>>|| No. 26621
>I think pre-tinder era, you got more of an explanation/polite rejection IRL, but these days people seem fine just disappearing.
In Friends, which I watched as a kid, throughout the series Joey would date women, have sex with them, and then never call them again. Whenever he encountered one of these women again, they were found to hate him.
|>>|| No. 26622
I've basically got an hour of mental energy per day and then I go bonkers and curl up like a dead Woodlouse.
|>>|| No. 26623
My mood has been inexplicably low for the last 24 hours. I'm beginning to wonder if my doctor prescribed me a placebo instead of mood stablisers as an experiment. Posting in this thread rather than starting a new one because i don't think there is really any constructive advice emo can give me that I don't know and haven't given myself. I just want to have a moan anonymously. My brain is broken no one has a good fix for it, and it leads to spontaneously shitty days. Meeting with the doctor next week maybe they will increase my dose or reveal the ruse and give me something functional.
|>>|| No. 26624
> mood stablisers
In my experience they take about two weeks to kick in properly. Before that you're just a crying mess who bursts into tears at random moments for no real reason at all 24/7.
I can only thank any god who can hear me that I'm no longer on the SSRIs that were triggering my manic episodes. I should be dead about 10 ten times over by now - I don't know what my mission here on earth actually IS but I obviously haven't completed it yet because somehow I'm still fucking here.
|>>|| No. 26625
I'm well over the 2 week mark at this point. I switched to SNRIs about 2 months ago from Mirtazapine and somedays they seem to do nothing at all. I might actually be feeling worse now then when I wasn't medicated.
Mirtazapine was great for me apart from my constant sleeping and drowsiness made me unfit for work hence the change in med. But this definitely feels like a step backwards.
|>>|| No. 26627
No more the shitpost wildly, be overly aggressive over perceived slights, talk a lot, talk bollocks, and generally act like you've whacked a henry of coke in the last hour, without being classifiable as psychosis sort (because you're totally lucid, you just find things like taking the piss out of the police lads for "voting UKIP" and asking if they joined the police because they failed their Argos exam three times absolutely hilarious).
I've had episodes of methamphetamine enduced euphoria that may have appeared to be Manic states from the outside but were actually just dopamine-mediated periods of 4-5 days where I wouldn't eat, sleep, consume anything that wasn't tea, Rennies, or 8%+ ABV Polish lager and write thousands of lines of code.
Actual Bi-Polar manic episodes in my experience tend to superficially more similar to schizophrenic episodes where what you're doing makes no sense to any outside observer, only that you're acting like a mentalist.
> I switched to SNRIs about 2 months ago from Mirtazapine and somedays they seem to do nothing at all. I might actually be feeling worse now then when I wasn't medicated.
What's you're diagnosis? I'm a bi-polar and not a standard melancholic depressive so SSRI/SNRI medications have a near 100% tendency to trigger manic episodes and compulsivity / impulsivity rather than calm me in any way, shape, or form.
Also which SNRI are you on, Venlafaxine? I posted somewhere on here about my dance with that devil of a drug but you seem to be tolerating whatever you're on rather well. Have you tried escitalopram yet? It's still a bastard of a drug but the side effect profile (especially the sexual side effects) tends to be a lot kinder than most other SSRIs and SNRIs.
|>>|| No. 26628
My current diagnosis is mixed anxiety and depression. Currently I'm on duloxitine. I had es-citalopram in the past and the sexual side effects were so bad for me I don't want to ever go back.
|>>|| No. 26629
> My current diagnosis is mixed anxiety and depression.
So the standard GP "I don't know what I'm doing so I'll just tick the most applicable boxes so I can prescribe the drugs the NHS trust prefers I prescribe" diagnosis, then?
See if you can get a referral to an actual psychiatrist, unless I'm being presumptuous and an actual, very very lazy, psychiatrist actually gave you that (hopefully hypothetical) diagnosis.
|>>|| No. 26630
There's nothing necessarily wrong with that diagnosis. Generalised anxiety disorder is incredibly common and comes with a substantially higher risk of depression. Avoidance coping is a very common reaction to anxiety, which can set off a depressive cycle of doing less/feeling worse/doing less.
SSRIs, SNRIs and Mirtazapine all have very similar efficacy, so the choice of drug is mainly educated guesswork and often comes down to tolerability of side-effects. Some patients will do better on a TCA or an MAOI, but they're riskier drugs with poorer tolerability so it's eminently sensible to try a few safer drugs first and it's inadvisable to prescribe them in primary care. Unless there's a major manic episode, a psychotic episode or a clear pattern of hypomanic episodes in the patient history, then I'd question the competence of anyone prescribing a mood stabiliser or antipsychotic.
Cost is rarely an issue, because most of the sensible first- and second-line treatment options are off patent.
|>>|| No. 26631
There's nothing necessarily wrong with that diagnosis, but nothing essentially right about it either - it's just the easiest least controversial diagnosis that any two bit quack could lazily make in five minutes; "here try these pills if they don't help we'll up the dose until you can't stand the side effects and then we'll swap you over to something else until either something works, the side effects drive you over the edge, or we fry every receptor subtype in your brain".
Duloxetine is also a shitty follow up to Mirtaz... why the fuck would you switch someone from a "lie in bed all day but at least you're not killing yourself drug" straight to a "get out of bed right now you Major Depressive fuck" drug? Now that is a decision that should make you question the competence of whoever this poor chap is working with.
I would never allow a GP to prescribe me psychiatric drugs on a first-line treatment basis just because, statistically, they're the most likely to work. You're fucking with the single most important thing you have - your mind. If even the most specialized psychiatrists are essentially witch doctors then GPs are the tribal soothsayer with a checklist and a list of approved drugs.
|>>|| No. 26632
>So the standard GP "I don't know what I'm doing so I'll just tick the most applicable boxes so I can prescribe the drugs the NHS trust prefers I prescribe" diagnosis, then?
Not at all. I think it is the right diagnosis for me I've had depression on and off for years but recently I've started having neurotic freak outs. (Dredging up old memories that make me uncomfortable for split second bursts)
The only other diagnosis I guess would make sense is PTSD.
When I began seeking treatment for my problems the first time I had private health insurance. I don't think a NHS GP has ever diagnosed me. The most recent shift in diagnosis is a result of talking through my symptoms and past with a psychiatrist for a solid hour.
>Duloxetine is also a shitty follow up to Mirtaz... why the fuck would you switch someone from a "lie in bed all day but at least you're not killing yourself drug" straight to a "get out of bed right now you Major Depressive fuck" drug? Now that is a decision that should make you question the competence of whoever this poor chap is working with.
What's your angle here? I want to be better I requested the change in drug because I was feeling much better and wanted to start living a more meaningful life, it just turned out the new drug doesn't work for me. You've made an awful lot of assumptions here about this being some presumptive GP making it up as they go along. I didn't tell you that. Where is this all coming from lad? It seems like you are projecting something onto me. What's really bothering you here?
|>>|| No. 26645
> I think it is the right diagnosis for me
How many hypothetical diagnosis cycles have you been through? It took three highly qualified specialist psychiatrists several cycles of almost killing me before we found something which, touch wood, seems to be a valid diagnosis for me and a combination of (currently) five medications that seem to be working for me. Maybe you were just lucky enough to be in the statistical majority. The fact that your medication still isn't right for you suggests that you aren't, though, and that your case is probably more complex than you hope.
>> >Duloxetine is also a shitty follow up to Mirtaz...
> What's your angle here?
That your doctor is shitty. Jumping you from Mirtaz to Duloxetine is like taking you from morphine to meth without trying codeine or caffeine or anything else along the way.
> I want to be better I requested the change in drug because I was feeling much better and wanted to start living a more meaningful life, it just turned out the new drug doesn't work for me.
That doesn't make sense, if you were feeling much better why would ask for a change in drug? Because you were too sleepy? Well sometimes that's the way the cookie crumbles. My own meds make me shit myself every two hours but if I come off them I'll probably be dead within two weeks, so I eat a box of Immodium a day and try to eat more fiber. You deal with the most important things things first. I, for example won't take anything that interferes with my ability to do sport and exercise - without those all my symptoms get worse, medication or no medication.
>You've made an awful lot of assumptions here about this being some presumptive GP making it up as they go along. I didn't tell you that.
It's called "reading between the lines" and what's we non-autists do in order to pick up on subtle details that people don't necessarily want or feel are necessary to spell out. Admittedly it works better in person than across the Internet, especially where mental health in involved.
>Where is this all coming from lad?
It seems we're heading into cunt off land because, instead of insulting your missus or keying your car, I've slagged off your doctor and the change in medication he's prescribed. There's nothing much of anything coming from anywhere other than one person who's been fucked around by psychiatrists being concerned about another human being who seems to be having a hard time with psychiatrists (or worse, a GP with a checklist, you still haven't been specific about that).
I won't quote or respond to the rest of your post because it's the same sort of bollocks I spit out when I'm angry and in pain too, and to be quite frank this isn't the time or the place.
If I've touched a sore nerve I apologize and I wish you all the best in your future treatments, but I will reiterate one last time - if you are seeing a GP and you end up on a third medication that still isn't perfect, go and see a real psychiatric specialist, not some piano dentist who'll keep you feeling like a couple of fortnights in a bad balloon.
|>>|| No. 26647
At the point that you are telling me I'm autistic because the assumptions you've made about me and my situation are wrong, you probably shouldn't be posting in emo and have clearly crossed the line of constructive posting.
It is terrible that you have to take so many meds and that you have been misdiagnosed so much, but it isn't a competition, and isn't relevant to my situation. If you have pain you want to share by all means share it. Don't use me as a proxy for the axe you grind though.
|>>|| No. 26648
>That your doctor is shitty. Jumping you from Mirtaz to Duloxetine is like taking you from morphine to meth without trying codeine or caffeine or anything else along the way.
This statement is obviously nonsense to anyone with even a rudimentary understanding of psychopharmacology. I don't know what your problem is or what agenda you're trying to push, but you're not helping the situation.
|>>|| No. 26655
> At the point that you are telling me I'm autistic because the assumptions you've made about me and my situation are wrong...
You haven't been clear about your situation, and it's obvious that your current medication isn't working, so anyone wanting to offer any advice beyond a shoulder to cry on has to read between the lines and make certain assumptions. The autism comment was perhaps too glib and didn't belong in /emo/ and I apologize for that.
Also don't worry about me lad, I've whinged enough on here to last several lifetimes, I'm not trying to one up you in the Who's The Most Mental Mentallad on Britfa challenge but as I said your medication clearly isn't right for you so it's quite likely that you're being mis-prescribed and/or misdiagnosed.
The fact that (presumably) you mentioned "mood stabalisers" in one post, and then said "then I switched from mirtaz to SSRIs" two posts later shows that something isn't quite right. An SSRI is certainly not a mood stabaliser and will patently make conditions that need mood stablisers worse (although for you it seems to be having little effect at all, which is better than an adverse effect, I suppose).
There's not much more to say, really as any other suggestion I make seems to upset you further which far from what I want.
>This statement is obviously nonsense to anyone with even a rudimentary understanding of psychopharmacology
It's illustratively hyperbolic and nothing more. If you like we can cunt off about the pharmacology of various generations and subtypes of antidepressants on /lab/ or /A/ or somewhere more apt.
Also why does overly self-defensive wannabe cunt-off starter shoe-horn the idea of "pushing an agenda" into every discussion? What possible "agenda" could I be wanting to "push"? Do you think I've come from Big Pharma to convince a bunch of Tea and Shed enthusiasts into buy my companies latest patented brain-fixer, because I'm not.
I have no "agenda" to "push" nor "bag of spuds" and indeed no purpose in this discussion that to try to help a lad whose medication clearly isn't working by applying my own personal experience of being prescribed plenty of medication that sometimes didn't work, and sometimes made things even worse. Nothing more, nothing less.
As said lad doesn't want my help or advice I won't be replying to any more posts on the subject and will leave the lad to his own devices and wish him all the best and a speedy recovery. That is all.
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