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>> No. 1795 Anonymous
27th May 2011
Friday 6:32 pm
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ITT: Workplace annoyances.

I'll get the ball rolling - having to bring in pastries on your birthday. I know it's cheaper if people bring their own in on their birthday instead of chipping in every time someone in the office has a birthday, but it's still fucking annoying having to fork out on your birthday.
2738 posts omitted. Last 50 posts shown. Expand all images.
>> No. 11568 Anonymous
26th July 2017
Wednesday 9:44 am
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>>11566

How did you escape being an office drone?
>> No. 11569 Anonymous
26th July 2017
Wednesday 9:47 am
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>>11559

A handful (nadge nadge wink wink) of times when I've had that sort of screeching, unbearable urge and it's hard to even focus on your own breathing let alone work.
>> No. 11570 Anonymous
26th July 2017
Wednesday 10:47 pm
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>>11568

Freelancing. If you have some vaguely marketable skills and you're willing to learn the basics of business, you can make twice as much money for half the work.
>> No. 11576 Anonymous
4th August 2017
Friday 8:23 pm
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I left my previous employer at the end of April. They still owe me about £200 in pension contributions.
>> No. 11577 Anonymous
4th August 2017
Friday 8:28 pm
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>>11570

Marketable skills is very vague, and I don't think all of them are enough to sustain a living wage. C'mon, lad, what do you do? Or if you'd prefer not to go into detail, what are some examples of marketable skills that would allow for a job as a freelancer?
>> No. 11578 Anonymous
4th August 2017
Friday 9:35 pm
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>>11577

I'm a computer scientist with a background in academia. I provide consulting services, mainly in relation to data-driven marketing. Most companies have vast troves of customer data; I help them to find profitable insights in that data.

There's nothing particularly special or valuable in my skillset. What's lucrative is the overlap between specialised knowledge and a real business problem. A lot of people have a skill that a business could use to make or save a lot of money, they just don't understand business well enough to find those opportunities. A lot of very well-paid consultants don't even have that, just the ability to sound plausible.
>> No. 11580 Anonymous
11th August 2017
Friday 8:51 pm
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Couple of things:

• Someone keeps running the hot tap in the toilets ever so slightly, so if you're not careful you'll end up almost scalding yourself when you go to wash your hands.

• Money for someone's leaving do. Money for someone's birthday present. Money for someone's baby. Money for someone's Just Giving page because they're running a marathon. Money if I want to join the work fantasy football league because the season's just started. Money. Money. Money.
>> No. 11582 Anonymous
11th August 2017
Friday 8:56 pm
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>>11580
>Money. Money. Money.
Can't you just say no and look down to check your phone to see how your torrents are doing?
>> No. 11583 Anonymous
11th August 2017
Friday 9:21 pm
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>>11582
I don't give money to all of them, but the constant requests are taking the piss. I missed off someone got married recently, so I chipped in to that one too.
>> No. 11584 Anonymous
11th August 2017
Friday 10:39 pm
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The amount of money to be given should be down to proximity/familiarity. Are they within 4 desks of you or do you regularly converse with them in person, email, slack etc. They get a tenner.

You know the name and face of the person, see and speak to them a few times a week or are within a couple of banks of desks from you they get a fiver. if you had to ask which one they are, or are on the same floor then you'll check a couple of quid.

Finally if You haven't got a clue who they, you have no relations with their department or aren't on the same floor they can get fucked.
>> No. 11588 Anonymous
29th August 2017
Tuesday 6:22 pm
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Quite a lot of my department are middle class.

I find it quite disconcerting to hear lads in their mid/late twenties obsessing about the growth in the values of their flats and how they plan to live there for a few more years before buying another place and renting the flat out or when they start talking about Daddy's investments or all the weird pet names they have for their grandparents and other relatives.

It's a complete different world.
>> No. 11590 Anonymous
30th August 2017
Wednesday 5:18 am
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>>11588

I hear you. I'm struggling to get out of my parents house and even though I earn a shade more than the typical worker at my office, everyone else is up to their second property.
>> No. 11591 Anonymous
30th August 2017
Wednesday 7:46 pm
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>>11590
I too struggle in such a manner.
My Wife and I live in a council place, always getting by but never getting rich. Her Sister and her chap are career minded high management types who just bought their second home. I get the feeling they only visit to see how the poor people live.
>> No. 11592 Anonymous
30th August 2017
Wednesday 8:39 pm
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>>11590
I am the highest paid in my team, I know that for a fact.

That hasn't stopped a trainee on c. £18,000 being able to afford a city centre apartment worth in the region of £270k whilst also driving a 66 plate Audi. His dad is European Sales Director for some multinational.

One of the other things they like to talk about between them is dining out at various expensive restaurants and they invariably have a sister who is living and working overseas. They're so casual with money, it's like they'll never have to worry about whether they can afford to do something.
>> No. 11593 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 6:46 pm
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I know what you guys mean about feeling like these people are on another planet. I was in the last group of people who got into further and higher education with grant money. I didn't have to get a ridiculously large student loan and instead I got various bursaries. As such I came out of it with an education before a lot of universities let anyone who was willing to pay get in.

As such I didn't have to work, but I did work in a pub most evenings and I never had a credit card or a loan. So I had to work my balls off just to get some cash in the bank and a decent enough credit rating so I could get a mortgage. I still had a good 4 o 5 years where although being qualified for the kind of work I was looking for I wouldn't get past the interview stage, due to a lack of experience. Being stuck in the catch 22 situation of can't get a job because I lack experience and I can't get experience because I can't get a job.

15 year on from that and I live comfortably as the department manager in local government. Even now I am not paid as much as I would do in the private sector, but I have less of the stresses that would come with working in the private sector chasing contracts. I don't live extravagantly and I have quite a lot of my cash tied up in ISAs to help my son out when he finishes uni as well as a nest egg for retirement.

I would definitely be called a class traitor by the old punk guy who loved Crass and sold the socialist worker who was always trying to get a union involved in the factory I worked in when I left college. It's not like I drive a Mercedes or a BMW, I very rarely shop at M&S or Waitrose. I haven't had a real holiday in nearly 8 years, the closest I get is going to a festival or 2 for a long weekend every year. I haven't even left the country in over 10 years and as such my passport has expired.
>> No. 11594 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 7:19 pm
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They can keep their planet.

I'm sure going from a caravan, liberated carlsberg and youtube to a 2 bed, 12 year and vinyl feels better than a mortgage and their old chum events.
>> No. 11595 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 8:55 pm
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>>11593
>I would definitely be called a class traitor by the old punk guy who loved Crass and sold the socialist worker who was always trying to get a union involved in the factory I worked in when I left college. It's not like I drive a Mercedes or a BMW, I very rarely shop at M&S or Waitrose. I haven't had a real holiday in nearly 8 years, the closest I get is going to a festival or 2 for a long weekend every year. I haven't even left the country in over 10 years and as such my passport has expired.
Fucking hell this is depressing.
>> No. 11596 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 9:09 pm
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I accepted a job offer about 6 months ago, joining a relatively recently established team, and was explicitly told at the interview that they'd be looking for someone to head the team up down the line; that someone would be me but they couldn't offer me the job off the bat as I'd be new to the company and not familiar with the way they operate. I found out this week they've been interviewing a senior manager from a much larger competitor for the role and have been very impressed by him.

>>11593
>I haven't had a real holiday in nearly 8 years

I've had a few funny looks when I've said I haven't been on holiday this year. My other half is having a couple of years out of work after giving birth so money's tighter on just my income.
>> No. 11597 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 9:31 pm
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>>11595
Depressing is living in a bedsit surviving off instant noodles and sandwiches, whilst claiming dole and housing benefits. Which was me at 21.

17 years later I own a large 3 bedroom house, which I will own outright in 3 more years. I am putting approximately 500 quid away a month in ISAs. Apart from my mortgage I don't have any debt and I am planning to retire by the time I am 55.

I could live extravagantly and have a summer holiday in Mauritius and spend every winter skiing in the Alps. I would rather get VIP festival tickets and go see bands I enjoy. I am going to Florida in October/November for 5 nights to do Disney, Universal Halloween Horror Nights and a ton of other shit. I could lease a BMW X5, but I would rather own my 12 year old Landrover Discovery.
>> No. 11598 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 9:44 pm
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>>11597
>I am planning to retire by the time I am 55

If you're planning on living off your local government pension then you won't be able to access it until you're 57. The minimum pension age is going to be set at 10 years below the State Pension age when it goes up to 67 in 2028 so you won't be able to receive it at age 55 anymore.

Also, why are putting so much in cash? Are you actually investing any of it?
>> No. 11599 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 9:46 pm
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>>11597
I apologise if I have offended you.

In any case, what is the point of enjoying life at 50, and denying all of that when you are younger?
>> No. 11600 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 10:21 pm
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>>11599
To give my son all of the monetary advantages I never grew up with. Also I can actually enjoy my retirement without having to worry about working and doing nothing but paying off my evergrowing debts.
>> No. 11601 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 10:22 pm
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>>11600
Pricey to have children.
>> No. 11602 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 10:22 pm
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>>11598
I have a very good private pension which is going to be subsidised by the cash in my savings.
>> No. 11603 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 10:26 pm
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>>11602
Define very good.
>> No. 11604 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 10:45 pm
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>>11603
The company I work for put in another 20% on top of whatever I pay in with 18% cumulative Interest per annum.
>> No. 11629 Anonymous
9th October 2017
Monday 5:32 pm
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Cunts who think they are in charge when they're not. Cunts who are in charge but have no clue how to be. Cunts who are insufferable fat sacks of shit who need to make themselves feel better by meddling in the affairs of others.

Today I've come home from work in a fucking shit mood, over a frankly trivial issue. I've had three separate people bitch at me over the same thing, where a procedure has changed without anyone telling me. To add insult to injury two of three claimed that's how it has always been, as if I'm supposed to have doublethinked the old procedure out of fucking memory.

Despite the fact that nobody has raised an issue with the way I've been doing it for the past year and a fucking half. Apparently I've been doing it wrong this whole time, but everything has been just fine. If any of the wankers running the place had any idea what the word communication fucking meant, this shit would never happen to begin with.

It doesn't take a lot to spoil a good mood. Ugh.
>> No. 11632 Anonymous
11th October 2017
Wednesday 5:08 pm
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>>11588 here again.

The posho lads have been moaning today that they'll barely have enough money for holidays next summer because they've just booked their ski holidays for this winter. Naturally, they only have to pay for passes and flights because they have a Godfather or some other relation who owns an apartment in the Alps who's more than happy to let them stay.
>> No. 11633 Anonymous
11th October 2017
Wednesday 6:37 pm
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>>11632
How does this make you feel?
>> No. 11634 Anonymous
11th October 2017
Wednesday 8:25 pm
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>>11633
I'll clue you in, lad. Look at the premise of the thread.

There's no point discriminating against people based on something they have no control over like who their parents are, be that a kid who gets sent to public school or a kid born to a couple of scroungers.

However, it's still annoying that I've had to work much harder to be in a similar position to them career-wise when they're a little bit on the thick side (I've seen the standard of their work and they struggle with knowing the difference between your/you're, they're/their/there etc.) but have been able to rely upon their background and things like connections from golfing. Plus, no matter how hard I work I won't ever benefit from things like a six-figure gift towards a house deposit or an inheritance likely to be at the very least towards the million £ mark.
>> No. 11635 Anonymous
11th October 2017
Wednesday 8:56 pm
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>>11634
I wasn't being rude. I'm a doley, and never get to meet people like that, so I was just wondering. It would have probably depressed me.
>> No. 11636 Anonymous
11th October 2017
Wednesday 9:22 pm
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>>11635
I didn't think you was, sorry if my last post seemed a little curt.

They're how I envisaged your average Tory voter under the age of 30 would be. Floating through life without appreciating how easy they have it and instead thinking they've got there purely on merit; believing "I've worked hard and succeeded, so anyone else can do it too" and that poor people simply need to get over it and lose the massive chip on their shoulder. Preoccupied with the inheritance they'll get from their parents and the rise in the value of their properties. Generally nice enough, though, apart from the forced "bantz". They'll do things like spending several hundred pounds in a Michelin starred restaurant or going out for drinks with a fund manager as if it's just a casual everyday occurrence.

I've noticed that they're the ones who need things simplifying and repeating the most during training and that they're the ones most likely to complain when they've been told to do something despite the quality of their work being towards the lower side within the department.
>> No. 11641 Anonymous
28th October 2017
Saturday 3:31 pm
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We're changing back office provider. I lost count of the amount of times I heard "new world" and "journey" during the WebEx training for it.
>> No. 11642 Anonymous
28th October 2017
Saturday 7:13 pm
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>>11636
I'm an under 30 Tory voter. I started on zero and will have no inheritance.
>> No. 11643 Anonymous
28th October 2017
Saturday 8:04 pm
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>>11642

Ahh, so you're just a daft sod then?
>> No. 11644 Anonymous
28th October 2017
Saturday 8:18 pm
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>>11643
I would be worse off under any other party.
>> No. 11645 Anonymous
28th October 2017
Saturday 8:20 pm
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>>11644

Are you a bailiff?
>> No. 11646 Anonymous
28th October 2017
Saturday 8:24 pm
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>>11644
Yeah who needs the NHS, National Insurance or free public education? Never used any of 'em meself. Thots whi oi vote toory new if onlee ee ken save up to bi a playg kur
>> No. 11647 Anonymous
28th October 2017
Saturday 8:56 pm
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>>11646
I have private health and unemployment insurance policies and I'm well beyond state education age. If that's all the opposition has then forget it.
>> No. 11648 Anonymous
28th October 2017
Saturday 8:57 pm
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>>11646
What?

>>11645
No, I'm a badly paid engineer.
>> No. 11649 Anonymous
28th October 2017
Saturday 9:03 pm
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>>11647
Wow. Pity about the age thing.
>> No. 11650 Anonymous
28th October 2017
Saturday 9:18 pm
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Lads, this is one of the few threads on here we try not to shit up with cunt-offs. Don't be cunts, now.
>> No. 11651 Anonymous
28th October 2017
Saturday 11:08 pm
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>>11648
How do I become a badly paid engineer? Being on bennies is getting depressing, and I do have en engineering degree, although worthless.
>> No. 11652 Anonymous
29th October 2017
Sunday 9:45 am
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>>11651
If you can't engineer yourself a job how will you ever be able to engineer Doris' Virgin TV?
>> No. 11653 Anonymous
29th October 2017
Sunday 11:56 am
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>>11650
But mate I really wanna cunt off this tory boy. Cant believe you're ruining my fun like this! YOU'RE NOT EVEN MY REAL DAD!!
>> No. 11654 Anonymous
31st October 2017
Tuesday 8:10 pm
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Colleague: "My computers not working properly/is slow/etc."
Me: "If you look in the phone directory, there's a number for a company we pay to fix our computers."
Colleague - 5 minutes later after doing absolutely nothing: "It's still not working."
>> No. 11658 Anonymous
1st November 2017
Wednesday 7:13 pm
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My team lead had the temerity to criticise me for browsing the web in the office while he's basically refusing to do parts of his own job. His manager's head is stuck in the clouds so naturally nothing will come of this either way.
>> No. 11659 Anonymous
1st November 2017
Wednesday 8:00 pm
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>>11658
How is he employed if he doesn't do his job? You should take lessons from him.
>> No. 11660 Anonymous
1st November 2017
Wednesday 8:26 pm
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>>11659
That's the public sector for you.
>> No. 11685 Anonymous
23rd November 2017
Thursday 8:48 pm
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"Hey anon can you do Task 1, it is very imporatant that we get it done as quickly as possible?"

"Okay, but I'm already doing important job A which has to be done as soon as I can, which one should I prioritise?"

"Both."

....
Bonus Content:

"Can you make x?"

"It'll take 2 hours"

*condecending look* "You can do it in 1."

"if I do it in 1, I won't have time to test it and find the faults"

"just do it"

-one hour later-

"here is x I think it is going to be buggy, I haven't had time to test it."

"okay let's go through it."

-we now spend an hour together going through it and finding faults I would have removed if left the fuck alone to do my job-

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