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>> No. 1795 Anonymous
27th May 2011
Friday 6:32 pm
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ITT: Workplace annoyances.

I'll get the ball rolling - having to bring in pastries on your birthday. I know it's cheaper if people bring their own in on their birthday instead of chipping in every time someone in the office has a birthday, but it's still fucking annoying having to fork out on your birthday.
2714 posts omitted. Last 50 posts shown. Expand all images.
>> No. 11522 Anonymous
30th June 2017
Friday 7:14 pm
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>>11520
No, you're right, reading the post before replying to it is definitely a waste of time.
>> No. 11526 Anonymous
30th June 2017
Friday 7:40 pm
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>>11522
Lewis Hamilton? I've never watched the snooker.
>> No. 11530 Anonymous
30th June 2017
Friday 11:45 pm
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>>11486
It works like any other public service where the only time you comment on it is when things go wrong which then gets blown out of all proportion as we all love a good moan.

I've personally never had any major dramas and once you learn the network you can work around the rare delays that occur. Even Birmingham New Street can be quickly navigated so long as the stress of the place doesn't make you flip out and start eating the face off the next person to blunder into your way.
>> No. 11531 Anonymous
2nd July 2017
Sunday 7:57 pm
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Some autist/silly cunt has mixed all the earl grey that a few of us have been picking at sporadically in with the regular teabags because "all tea's the same, innit".
Just seems a bit of a waste throwing out 100 or so bags because of this unwanted tea lottery, where even some of the normal bags have a faint taste of EG.
A more drastic version would be someone mixing diesel and petrol, because it's all the same, innit.
>> No. 11532 Anonymous
4th July 2017
Tuesday 5:02 pm
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There's a woman at work who always refers to people as "Hun". It drives me up the fucking wall.
>> No. 11533 Anonymous
4th July 2017
Tuesday 5:48 pm
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>>11532
I could be worse, you could work somewhere round Burton and have to put up with "duck".
>> No. 11534 Anonymous
4th July 2017
Tuesday 8:26 pm
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>>11531
That is horrific.
>> No. 11535 Anonymous
4th July 2017
Tuesday 8:36 pm
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>>11533
I don't mind things that are local vernacular, moving near Leeds I've had to get used to people calling one another love and saying things like "y'alright, cock?", but calling people hun just isn't on.
>> No. 11536 Anonymous
5th July 2017
Wednesday 6:11 pm
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"I'm going to save these password protected documents I've been sent by another company, but I'm not actually going to also save record of what the passwords actually are."
>> No. 11537 Anonymous
6th July 2017
Thursday 2:49 am
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>>11533
Ey up.
>> No. 11538 Anonymous
6th July 2017
Thursday 3:09 am
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>>11536
If it's an excel document you can get around it quite easily.
>> No. 11539 Anonymous
6th July 2017
Thursday 5:11 pm
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>>11538
It's a pdf.

Today must have been the stuffiest day in existence. At least that's how it feels without air con.
>> No. 11540 Anonymous
6th July 2017
Thursday 5:23 pm
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>>11539
>Today must have been the stuffiest day in existence.

Fucking hell this. I've struggled to get anything done in these conditions today. Not to sound a tart but my hair isn't having a fun time of things either.

I'm sick of summer.
>> No. 11541 Anonymous
6th July 2017
Thursday 9:48 pm
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I'm glad I went out at the weekend to Marks and Sparks and bought some more short sleeved linen shirts. They are even allowing smart shorts n the office, so I bought some chino shorts as well.
>> No. 11550 Anonymous
24th July 2017
Monday 7:12 pm
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"Almost the entire company is out of the office on Friday for our biannual meet-up. We need to run an update on our servers, which will take 5 or 6 hours; instead of running this on an evening, weekend or when everyone is out on Friday we're going to start it at 9:30 tomorrow which will also be too short notice to prepare anything you won't need the computer system for."
>> No. 11552 Anonymous
24th July 2017
Monday 7:29 pm
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>>11550
Cunts.
>> No. 11553 Anonymous
24th July 2017
Monday 7:33 pm
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>>11550
"We know this critical system is running out of space, but if we give you more space we can't take it back later, so call us when you're down to $(what we go through in around two days) and we'll give you $(10x the previous number)."
>> No. 11558 Anonymous
25th July 2017
Tuesday 5:00 pm
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R-419741-1454675353-7372.jpeg.jpg
115581155811558
WE'RE GOING ON A JOURNEY. THE TENDERING JOURNEY. THE QUOTATION JOURNEY. THE APPLICATION JOURNEY. THE SUBMISSION JOURNEY.

JOURNEY. JOURNEY. FUCKING JOURNEY.
>> No. 11559 Anonymous
25th July 2017
Tuesday 7:02 pm
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Lads, do any of you ever wank in your office toilets?
>> No. 11561 Anonymous
25th July 2017
Tuesday 7:29 pm
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>>11559
Urgh. No.
>> No. 11562 Anonymous
25th July 2017
Tuesday 7:52 pm
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>>11561
Is wanking at work a step too far?
>> No. 11563 Anonymous
25th July 2017
Tuesday 8:14 pm
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>>11562

It is unless you're a rent boy, yeah.
>> No. 11564 Anonymous
25th July 2017
Tuesday 8:19 pm
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>>11559
I think I've wanked in the toilets at three previous jobs. They were all individual toilets rather than a cubicle, though. This was when I was late teens/early twenties.
>> No. 11566 Anonymous
25th July 2017
Tuesday 9:06 pm
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>>11559

Back when I was an office drone, yes, regularly. There's a smug satisfaction to wanking on company time.
>> No. 11568 Anonymous
26th July 2017
Wednesday 9:44 am
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>>11566

How did you escape being an office drone?
>> No. 11569 Anonymous
26th July 2017
Wednesday 9:47 am
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>>11559

A handful (nadge nadge wink wink) of times when I've had that sort of screeching, unbearable urge and it's hard to even focus on your own breathing let alone work.
>> No. 11570 Anonymous
26th July 2017
Wednesday 10:47 pm
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>>11568

Freelancing. If you have some vaguely marketable skills and you're willing to learn the basics of business, you can make twice as much money for half the work.
>> No. 11576 Anonymous
4th August 2017
Friday 8:23 pm
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I left my previous employer at the end of April. They still owe me about £200 in pension contributions.
>> No. 11577 Anonymous
4th August 2017
Friday 8:28 pm
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>>11570

Marketable skills is very vague, and I don't think all of them are enough to sustain a living wage. C'mon, lad, what do you do? Or if you'd prefer not to go into detail, what are some examples of marketable skills that would allow for a job as a freelancer?
>> No. 11578 Anonymous
4th August 2017
Friday 9:35 pm
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>>11577

I'm a computer scientist with a background in academia. I provide consulting services, mainly in relation to data-driven marketing. Most companies have vast troves of customer data; I help them to find profitable insights in that data.

There's nothing particularly special or valuable in my skillset. What's lucrative is the overlap between specialised knowledge and a real business problem. A lot of people have a skill that a business could use to make or save a lot of money, they just don't understand business well enough to find those opportunities. A lot of very well-paid consultants don't even have that, just the ability to sound plausible.
>> No. 11580 Anonymous
11th August 2017
Friday 8:51 pm
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Couple of things:

• Someone keeps running the hot tap in the toilets ever so slightly, so if you're not careful you'll end up almost scalding yourself when you go to wash your hands.

• Money for someone's leaving do. Money for someone's birthday present. Money for someone's baby. Money for someone's Just Giving page because they're running a marathon. Money if I want to join the work fantasy football league because the season's just started. Money. Money. Money.
>> No. 11582 Anonymous
11th August 2017
Friday 8:56 pm
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>>11580
>Money. Money. Money.
Can't you just say no and look down to check your phone to see how your torrents are doing?
>> No. 11583 Anonymous
11th August 2017
Friday 9:21 pm
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>>11582
I don't give money to all of them, but the constant requests are taking the piss. I missed off someone got married recently, so I chipped in to that one too.
>> No. 11584 Anonymous
11th August 2017
Friday 10:39 pm
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The amount of money to be given should be down to proximity/familiarity. Are they within 4 desks of you or do you regularly converse with them in person, email, slack etc. They get a tenner.

You know the name and face of the person, see and speak to them a few times a week or are within a couple of banks of desks from you they get a fiver. if you had to ask which one they are, or are on the same floor then you'll check a couple of quid.

Finally if You haven't got a clue who they, you have no relations with their department or aren't on the same floor they can get fucked.
>> No. 11588 Anonymous
29th August 2017
Tuesday 6:22 pm
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Quite a lot of my department are middle class.

I find it quite disconcerting to hear lads in their mid/late twenties obsessing about the growth in the values of their flats and how they plan to live there for a few more years before buying another place and renting the flat out or when they start talking about Daddy's investments or all the weird pet names they have for their grandparents and other relatives.

It's a complete different world.
>> No. 11590 Anonymous
30th August 2017
Wednesday 5:18 am
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>>11588

I hear you. I'm struggling to get out of my parents house and even though I earn a shade more than the typical worker at my office, everyone else is up to their second property.
>> No. 11591 Anonymous
30th August 2017
Wednesday 7:46 pm
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>>11590
I too struggle in such a manner.
My Wife and I live in a council place, always getting by but never getting rich. Her Sister and her chap are career minded high management types who just bought their second home. I get the feeling they only visit to see how the poor people live.
>> No. 11592 Anonymous
30th August 2017
Wednesday 8:39 pm
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>>11590
I am the highest paid in my team, I know that for a fact.

That hasn't stopped a trainee on c. £18,000 being able to afford a city centre apartment worth in the region of £270k whilst also driving a 66 plate Audi. His dad is European Sales Director for some multinational.

One of the other things they like to talk about between them is dining out at various expensive restaurants and they invariably have a sister who is living and working overseas. They're so casual with money, it's like they'll never have to worry about whether they can afford to do something.
>> No. 11593 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 6:46 pm
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I know what you guys mean about feeling like these people are on another planet. I was in the last group of people who got into further and higher education with grant money. I didn't have to get a ridiculously large student loan and instead I got various bursaries. As such I came out of it with an education before a lot of universities let anyone who was willing to pay get in.

As such I didn't have to work, but I did work in a pub most evenings and I never had a credit card or a loan. So I had to work my balls off just to get some cash in the bank and a decent enough credit rating so I could get a mortgage. I still had a good 4 o 5 years where although being qualified for the kind of work I was looking for I wouldn't get past the interview stage, due to a lack of experience. Being stuck in the catch 22 situation of can't get a job because I lack experience and I can't get experience because I can't get a job.

15 year on from that and I live comfortably as the department manager in local government. Even now I am not paid as much as I would do in the private sector, but I have less of the stresses that would come with working in the private sector chasing contracts. I don't live extravagantly and I have quite a lot of my cash tied up in ISAs to help my son out when he finishes uni as well as a nest egg for retirement.

I would definitely be called a class traitor by the old punk guy who loved Crass and sold the socialist worker who was always trying to get a union involved in the factory I worked in when I left college. It's not like I drive a Mercedes or a BMW, I very rarely shop at M&S or Waitrose. I haven't had a real holiday in nearly 8 years, the closest I get is going to a festival or 2 for a long weekend every year. I haven't even left the country in over 10 years and as such my passport has expired.
>> No. 11594 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 7:19 pm
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They can keep their planet.

I'm sure going from a caravan, liberated carlsberg and youtube to a 2 bed, 12 year and vinyl feels better than a mortgage and their old chum events.
>> No. 11595 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 8:55 pm
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>>11593
>I would definitely be called a class traitor by the old punk guy who loved Crass and sold the socialist worker who was always trying to get a union involved in the factory I worked in when I left college. It's not like I drive a Mercedes or a BMW, I very rarely shop at M&S or Waitrose. I haven't had a real holiday in nearly 8 years, the closest I get is going to a festival or 2 for a long weekend every year. I haven't even left the country in over 10 years and as such my passport has expired.
Fucking hell this is depressing.
>> No. 11596 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 9:09 pm
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I accepted a job offer about 6 months ago, joining a relatively recently established team, and was explicitly told at the interview that they'd be looking for someone to head the team up down the line; that someone would be me but they couldn't offer me the job off the bat as I'd be new to the company and not familiar with the way they operate. I found out this week they've been interviewing a senior manager from a much larger competitor for the role and have been very impressed by him.

>>11593
>I haven't had a real holiday in nearly 8 years

I've had a few funny looks when I've said I haven't been on holiday this year. My other half is having a couple of years out of work after giving birth so money's tighter on just my income.
>> No. 11597 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 9:31 pm
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>>11595
Depressing is living in a bedsit surviving off instant noodles and sandwiches, whilst claiming dole and housing benefits. Which was me at 21.

17 years later I own a large 3 bedroom house, which I will own outright in 3 more years. I am putting approximately 500 quid away a month in ISAs. Apart from my mortgage I don't have any debt and I am planning to retire by the time I am 55.

I could live extravagantly and have a summer holiday in Mauritius and spend every winter skiing in the Alps. I would rather get VIP festival tickets and go see bands I enjoy. I am going to Florida in October/November for 5 nights to do Disney, Universal Halloween Horror Nights and a ton of other shit. I could lease a BMW X5, but I would rather own my 12 year old Landrover Discovery.
>> No. 11598 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 9:44 pm
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>>11597
>I am planning to retire by the time I am 55

If you're planning on living off your local government pension then you won't be able to access it until you're 57. The minimum pension age is going to be set at 10 years below the State Pension age when it goes up to 67 in 2028 so you won't be able to receive it at age 55 anymore.

Also, why are putting so much in cash? Are you actually investing any of it?
>> No. 11599 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 9:46 pm
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>>11597
I apologise if I have offended you.

In any case, what is the point of enjoying life at 50, and denying all of that when you are younger?
>> No. 11600 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 10:21 pm
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>>11599
To give my son all of the monetary advantages I never grew up with. Also I can actually enjoy my retirement without having to worry about working and doing nothing but paying off my evergrowing debts.
>> No. 11601 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 10:22 pm
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>>11600
Pricey to have children.
>> No. 11602 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 10:22 pm
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>>11598
I have a very good private pension which is going to be subsidised by the cash in my savings.
>> No. 11603 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 10:26 pm
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>>11602
Define very good.
>> No. 11604 Anonymous
2nd September 2017
Saturday 10:45 pm
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>>11603
The company I work for put in another 20% on top of whatever I pay in with 18% cumulative Interest per annum.

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