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>> No. 378538 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 10:35 pm
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4 years today. Time flies so past.
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>> No. 378697 Anonymous
12th July 2014
Saturday 1:32 am
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>>378685
Hahaha he has a silly accent! Let's nick his lunch money.
>> No. 378700 Anonymous
12th July 2014
Saturday 2:17 am
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>>378671
> I don't think you've really thought this through. I'm a member of a party
Opinion discarded.
>>378677
> All parties are composed of normal people,
U wot m8?

I wish the people would just march on London. The only time that will happen though is if someone other than the people wants to engineer it.
>> No. 378702 Anonymous
12th July 2014
Saturday 2:54 am
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>>378700
This. Facebook allows everyone to raise a stink, without them actually having to go anywhere and make any impact.
>> No. 378709 Anonymous
12th July 2014
Saturday 9:53 am
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>>378697
His accent is the least of his worries, m8.
>> No. 378715 Anonymous
12th July 2014
Saturday 11:28 am
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>>378700
Whatever you say teenlad.

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>> No. 378566 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 1:33 am
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Oi lads;

I don't know if any of you have heard of this here Apple reseller - I only know them 'cos they've got a branch in Wimbledon - but how d'you reckon they managed to settle on the name without even a cursory google to check if they had the same name as a well-known unsavoury forum? I did a quick check, and it seems that they became a thing quite a bit after said forum gained infamy, so it shouldn't have been too far down the search engine rankings, especially since a film was made about it.
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>> No. 378568 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 1:45 am
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Because they're affiliated.
>> No. 378569 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 1:53 am
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>>378568
Apple's trademark colour is white for a reason. FACT.
>> No. 378570 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 2:41 am
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do they only sell white iPhones?

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>> No. 377552 Anonymous
25th June 2014
Wednesday 5:16 pm
377552 Bug hunt.
The spider I just missed was so fat when it fell of the wall and bounced off my Fallout 3 collectors tin it made a genuine "kunk" noise. Now I have to spend however long it takes for it to come back out of hiding sitting on my bed with a glass and sheet of card. Days, if I have to.

What have you done to try and combat the bug menace, /b/?

And .gs at large because no one posts on /b/ anymore.
27 posts and 1 image omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 378472 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 10:10 pm
378472 spacer
a female housespider is nesting in my bathroom... it comes out at night and stands on it's web just outside of it's lair

Female HS are very secretive creatures
>> No. 378476 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 10:15 pm
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>>378472

Stop falling for the enemy, you bloody spider nonce!
>> No. 378478 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 10:16 pm
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>>378476

fuck it i'll squash the arachnid cunt
>> No. 378481 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 10:18 pm
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>>378478

Oorah!

The war is one step closer to being won, brother!
>> No. 378484 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 10:20 pm
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You guys are dicks, spiders are cool.

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>> No. 377080 Anonymous
10th June 2014
Tuesday 9:45 pm
377080 Tragi-comic sexual experiences.
Lads, I have reached my personal sexual low, wanking to pics of a colleague on Instagram.

Can it get worse than this?
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>> No. 378441 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 5:34 pm
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>>378440

You should meet my missus. She is Asian and most definitely not materialistic. A nympho, yes. Materialistic, no.
>> No. 378442 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 5:35 pm
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>>378441
I don't give a fig about your missus unless she's about to strip off in front of me.
>> No. 378462 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 8:18 pm
378462 Tales of a sexpat
Here you go, HKLad. The stage is all yours.
>> No. 378463 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 8:23 pm
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>>378462
Thanks.
>> No. 378473 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 10:11 pm
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>>378441

>missus

enjoy your cack coloured penis

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>> No. 378270 Anonymous
7th July 2014
Monday 1:09 am
378270 Insomnia thread
I'm off ill with a summer Flu and I can't sleep, which isn't that unusual for me on a disease free night actually. With that in mind, I thought I'd try a late night thread to post ramblings in.

I am really bored and thought in my disease addled state that eating a whole pack of Sherbet Lemons would be a fucking fantastic idea and as a result I've ruined the roof of my mouth and suspect my shit will be yellow in the morning.

Anyway, why aren't you in bed? To pass the time I figured we could post pictures of our desktops and mercilessly assassinate each other's characters based on what they look like.
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>> No. 378457 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 7:34 pm
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>>378435
Soft7 2.0
>> No. 378460 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 8:00 pm
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>>378456

Not sure why but I hated the taskbar icons. I think because it permanently crowds the screen with something that always just worked for me via Quick Launch. I customized my Windows 7 to look a lot like XP. Each to their own. Sage for boring myself.
>> No. 378461 Anonymous
8th July 2014
Tuesday 8:09 pm
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>>378460

I felt like you, but then I set the taskbar to autohide. It gives you more screenspace and gives you the icons at the swing of a mouse.
>> No. 378515 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 3:27 pm
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>>378444
foobar is not bad. AIMP too.
>>378448
> Cloud
Feh. What if the connection dies? What if some bellend in that cloud decides to remove your shit for whatever reason?
>> No. 378518 Anonymous
9th July 2014
Wednesday 3:39 pm
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>>378515
Do you use a washboard instead of a washing machine for your laundry because of the possibility of a blackout?

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>> No. 376182 Anonymous
16th May 2014
Friday 1:54 pm
376182 WEEKEND
Tell me about what you're doing this weekend, britfags.

I've just had my last exam, so pic related.
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>> No. 377855 Anonymous
2nd July 2014
Wednesday 3:52 pm
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I can't tell if I've been constructive today or just fooled myself into thinking I have been. I've read about 50 pages of The Unbearable Lightness of Being which is for the most part a little tedious but bearable.
>> No. 377871 Anonymous
2nd July 2014
Wednesday 10:11 pm
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>>377854

One's (your) missus perhaps.
>> No. 377873 Anonymous
2nd July 2014
Wednesday 10:30 pm
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>>377854
Something that needs a lot of drilling, obviously.
>> No. 377889 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 10:41 am
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I went out last night to meet a friend I'd not seen in a while for a quick pint. I got home at 4 in the morning, I think I'm still drunk.
>> No. 377926 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 9:42 pm
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>>376182
I spent my day organising my movies and TV folders for Plex. I still won't watch ~80% of it but it's better than watching Youtube videos all day. Considering getting a Chromecast so I can (not) watch stuff on the main telly without bringing down my laptop or whatever. Basically, fuck wires and physical media, I want to be in the future.


maybe one day I'll do something vaguely useful with my life

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>> No. 377903 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 5:03 pm
377903 Help
Brits, I need your help.

I seem to have completely fallen for your chubby Princess Eugenie.

Now I've always been into chubbies, but never into British girls, let alone princesses. They don't want me either, so it's all fine.

But I can't stop wanting to bone her, to the point that I want to kidnap her and take her to my basement for procreating purposes.

Please help me into stopping that. Is there anything repulsive about her? I know that she's got a britface and is more than a little on the chubby side but it doesn't seem to calm me. Help!
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>> No. 377922 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 9:10 pm
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It's a shame this thread isn't in /iq/. Now I'm going to get banned for posting this.

Fucking foreigners. Drunken Racists would place immigration restrictions on these Krauts and garlic munchers who come over here and shit up our image boards.
>> No. 377923 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 9:18 pm
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>>377922
Are they planning to set up passport checks on the internet?
>> No. 377924 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 9:26 pm
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>>377923

Are Nige would seek out and destroy the foreign devil in every dark nook and alley, every dirty city street and every dank corner of the internet. He would not allow the corruption of our culture, the Great British pint and a fight, the uniquely English chip shop curry, the islanders of the empire to be influenced by such uncouth individuals.

Make no mistake, a vote for Nige is a vote for the end of threads like these.
>> No. 377925 Anonymous
3rd July 2014
Thursday 9:31 pm
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>>377914>>377915>>377916
Yeah we all look like this. No lookers over here in Britain.

You fucking idiot.
>> No. 378598 Anonymous
10th July 2014
Thursday 4:55 pm
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>>377916>>377915>>377914

How can I tell that this is being posted by a Kraut?

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>> No. 377648 Anonymous
28th June 2014
Saturday 10:20 pm
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Lads.
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>> No. 377838 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 10:28 am
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>>377821

I think I'll be listening to The Horrors with the utmost promptitude. Holy crap, "promptitude" is a word, ha, I thought I just made that up.

Can't believe the BBC didn't get video of Danny Brown, Points of View will be getting both barrels this weekend.
>> No. 377839 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 12:30 pm
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>>377838

That's odd. Since they have all the cameras set up on those stages, I don't really get why they don't film it all.
>> No. 377840 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 3:12 pm
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>>377839

It really is. They've taken five pictures and you can add the tracks do some playlist thing I suppose I'll have to register for, but no film.
>> No. 377841 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 3:32 pm
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>>377839
In general I thought the Glasto coverage was pretty poor. I enjoyed watching the metallica set in full but for such a varied festival with a staggering number of acts I would have thought it would make more sense to show between 1-3 songs from a wider array of bands rather than spending 90 minutes on just one.

Reading festival had an on-demand searchable archive and the Download highlights show most of the bands on the Main and Zippo stages (even if the presenter was a clueless bintoid last year). I'm not a Glasto fan but I would have thought that with the BBC behind the coverage would be fantastic, it's disappointing that it wasn't.
>> No. 377842 Anonymous
1st July 2014
Tuesday 6:19 pm
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>>377841
Gone are the days when the BBC sent hundreds of staff to Glasto for a massive jolly. Austerity, the 'current climate', etc.

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>> No. 377609 Anonymous
27th June 2014
Friday 5:03 am
377609 Morning thread
Snake, there's a Chinese proverb that says, 'No one who can rise before dawn 360 days a year fails to bring his family fortune.' Although I assume it doesn't count if you just didn't sleep at all.
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>> No. 377610 Anonymous
27th June 2014
Friday 5:14 am
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I inherited my fortune, so fuck you.
>> No. 377611 Anonymous
27th June 2014
Friday 5:54 am
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>>377609
Bugger.

Why didn't I just go to sleep when I could've?


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>> No. 377501 Anonymous
23rd June 2014
Monday 4:16 pm
377501 Bzzz....
Nuts to Osama Bin Laden. These fuckers are the real hide and seek champions. The patient predator lurking somewhere.

It flies out from behind the bookcase. Bzzz... I keep my eye on it. Behind the chest of drawers it goes. It doesn't emerge on the other end. The walls are white and the lights are on. My 20/20 vision though seems to fail me.

Out comes the torch, sweeping side to side, trying to see where the little fucker has landed.

Vanished. How? Harry Fucking Houdini of the insect world.

I know you are in here. Hiding. Waiting.

The game is a foot and I'm covered in bruises. Tonight, we shall tango once more.
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>> No. 377545 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 11:14 pm
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>>377543

How does that work unless you have a street lamp right outside your window?
>> No. 377546 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 11:19 pm
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>>377545

Moonlight, car headlights, other houses with lights on, street lamps across the street.
>> No. 377547 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 11:23 pm
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I'm confused - I only ever encounter mosquitos when I go abroad. You all have problems with them here too?
>> No. 377548 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 11:25 pm
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>>377546

Maybe I just live in arsefuck nowhere, but it's not nearly light enough outside.
>> No. 377549 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 11:45 pm
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Mosquitos are the only species that kills more people each year than are killed by other people. Forget sharks and wolves, it's all out war when I see one of these fuckers.

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>> No. 377526 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 6:08 pm
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Literally 30 seconds of verbal altercations with my downstairs "neighbors" and I'm more on edge than a Super Hans at... something, Jesus, I'm just really on edge.

I was all "stop banging on my stairs", and he was all "yeah sure", and I was all "thanks", but then he didn't stop so after a few minutes I was like "Hey, man, WTH?" and his friend (who was clearly a lawyer) was all "we can make as much noise as we like until 11PM" and I was like "sure, just don't do it on my outside stairs" and he kept saying the same thing because he clearly wasn't a lawyer.

Apparently that was the only place they could change the that tire, despite them now changing it somewhere else.

How likely is that I'll be stabbed by these guys who definitely aren't running a chop shop from the flat beneath mine? Also, why are people such cocks?

#blogpost
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>> No. 377535 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 7:23 pm
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>>377532

>My bowel movements are terribly inconsistent, it's not a risk I can take. Plus they drive about at all kinds of wacky hours, so it's likely they'd pull in and draw their headlights upon this mad squatting step-dumper and immediately reverse their policy of "no stab"; a decision I wouldn't begrudge.

For some reason I got curious how people give stool samples so I googled it. There were suggestions such as shit on a medical glove or on a bit of cardboard. Perhaps you could do something similar.
>> No. 377537 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 7:41 pm
377537 spacer
Here OP. Take this: http://lifehacker.com/5852903/silence-noisy-neighbors-by-transmitting-signals-through-their-own-speakers
>> No. 377538 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 9:03 pm
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>>377535

I have given a stool sample before and I just shat in an oversized Harry Potter mug, maybe that could work out?
>> No. 377539 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 9:21 pm
377539 spacer
>>377537
Has anyone actually successfully done this, or is it part of the myriad of abstract bullshit that no one ever does, that is on lifehacker?
>> No. 377540 Anonymous
24th June 2014
Tuesday 9:35 pm
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>>377537>>377539

They live sort of below and to the side of me, so I don't know if I could even do it. Plus all the music I have I really like, and I wouldn't want Crystal Castles to be a negative association for someone. I like them just that much.

And surely spending dozens of pounds to irritate people is basically just an admission they've won? Like when the Predator tries to blow Arnie up at the end of the movie, Predator.

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>> No. 377424 Anonymous
21st June 2014
Saturday 2:01 am
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He come out Stew, and he said to the man "What do you do for a living?"
31 posts omitted. Expand all images.
>> No. 377494 Anonymous
23rd June 2014
Monday 4:21 am
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>>377493
As does Stewart.
>> No. 377495 Anonymous
23rd June 2014
Monday 6:12 am
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>>377490
What the fuck are you talking about?
>> No. 377498 Anonymous
23rd June 2014
Monday 3:23 pm
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>>377494

You seem to be struggling to understand the different aims of the man who runs the country and a professional clown.
>> No. 377499 Anonymous
23rd June 2014
Monday 3:25 pm
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>>377498
You might want to reread that statement.
>> No. 377516 Anonymous
23rd June 2014
Monday 5:45 pm
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>>377499

Very droll.

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>> No. 377396 Anonymous
20th June 2014
Friday 1:34 pm
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Right lads, it is my 30th today. Even the pissheads in the pub have only had one confirmed attendee fro my BBQ.

I feel like so:

http://www.youtube.com/v/i3YGdPMl-2w
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>> No. 377407 Anonymous
20th June 2014
Friday 11:18 pm
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>>377400

But then you just end up how I've ended up; With no friends in the world other than a missus that sort of ends up more like a mother you perform degrading sex acts on. I'm not sure if it's preferable to just being a lonely cunt in a bedsit eating scotch eggs and drinking White Ace.
>> No. 377408 Anonymous
20th June 2014
Friday 11:26 pm
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>>377407

I think the thing that keeps most people together is having kids and living vicariously through them. Obviously a 40 year barren marriage would bore anyone shitless no matter how depraved the sex, but the kids provide new and interesting experiences and conversations every day.

Then by the time you're 60 things like Time Team, gardening and buying jewelery from the TV at 4am seem really fucking interesting.
>> No. 377410 Anonymous
20th June 2014
Friday 11:29 pm
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>>377408
They're really fucking interesting now and I'm only in my 20's. Oh God..
>> No. 377412 Anonymous
20th June 2014
Friday 11:37 pm
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>>377408
>>377410

To be fair, when I'm fucked off my tits at 4am, some of the things they sell on the TV shopping channels do seem to be utterly mind-blowing.
>> No. 377417 Anonymous
21st June 2014
Saturday 12:15 am
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>>377407

>I'm not sure if it's preferable to just being a lonely cunt in a bedsit eating scotch eggs and drinking White Ace.

Swapsies?

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>> No. 377163 Anonymous
13th June 2014
Friday 12:48 am
377163 Watch your backs lads..
I was feeling restless this fine evening, and decided to take a stroll along my favourite routes with a joint or two, when I was almost jumped by a sneaky bastard in the shadows.
I had completed most of my ramble in the full moon across the neglected paths and forgotten alleys of my silent village. Feeling much refreshed in the warm night air, unencumbered by company with seldom a soul in sight. I feel safe in these streets and fields, having frequented them since childhood. I stopped at a bench near home to enjoy the remains of my smoke in the pale moonlight and still air.
I was routinely alerted to the casual noises of the night rumbling across the velvet night, the rustling of animals and the cracking of twigs. I was vigilant but relaxed, knowing any persons who approached would be clearly audible.
After some time I looked to my right, and was instantly aware of another presence. Dark, and smaller than me, I instantly became aware that I had startled it with my movement. An animal then. My heart started pounding, and a rushing filled my ears; three staccato barks assaulted my ears, and a thousand possibilities shrieked through my mind. A dog!? a cat? A Fox! The presence; a Fox indeed, made off roughly twenty yards and stopped back to look at me. Resuming his audacious assault the fox called, I imagined, for reinforcement and rally, his cry piercing the night in a shrill scream that can wake a man in sweat from the deadest of sleeps.
Rousing my own courage and grit I stood and stared this rabid, foul beast down. The terror receded from my heart and my eyes and the light began to shine once again within me. I began my measured stride towards home never taking my eyes from the beast that tried to dodge my eyes in the low light; staying close to the ground and dashing here and there occasionally. Soon enough I reached the first tendrils of the orange haze thrown out by the sodium streetlights in my street. I passed through the gate and was Home.

I quite like foxes.
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>> No. 377293 Anonymous
16th June 2014
Monday 1:10 am
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>>377292

Verse.

http://onlinesequencer.net/14194
>> No. 377318 Anonymous
16th June 2014
Monday 6:53 pm
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>>377285
Even if you take into account the trivia mentioned in this thread and deduce that by "sixth verse" he's not counting the censored one and instead means the bit where you sing "he made them all well" I still don't see what he means. I don't read that as implying they get on, more "God made all the pretty shit and oh isn't it nice because they're so Goddy".
>> No. 377319 Anonymous
16th June 2014
Monday 6:57 pm
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Whatever else you may believe about it, that hymn is the absolute epitome of lyrical redundancy.
http://www.youtube.com/v/E7dYXVLPd6Y
>> No. 377340 Anonymous
17th June 2014
Tuesday 8:45 pm
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>>377319

Watch those angles
>> No. 377387 Anonymous
19th June 2014
Thursday 5:16 pm
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>>377319

All I hear now is the BNP version.

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