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>> No. 403945 Anonymous
12th July 2016
Tuesday 8:17 am
403945 Random help needed.
I've launched a new company, a travel one, and I need help/input/ideas/abuse related to the following.

Website optimisation. I've got a meeting with the webmaster this week, but would like suggestions as for what to ask him for.

Gaining followers on social media, Instagram and Twitter in particular.

I'm planning on giving discounts to students, pensioners and former military personnel. Anyone else I should include?

Give any other ideas and feedback you can think of.
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>> No. 403964 Anonymous
12th July 2016
Tuesday 10:58 pm
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>>403957

I've been hired to do damage control by two companies who ended up on the Google naughty step. Both went bankrupt within six months. Few web-oriented companies can survive losing 60-70% of their traffic overnight. Google are absolutely merciless about shady SEO tactics.
>> No. 403972 Anonymous
14th July 2016
Thursday 12:37 am
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>>403957
>>403964

Thicko here, what exactly qualify as 'shady SEO tactics'? I program a bit but don't deal in webmastery stuff and you've got me intrigued now.
>> No. 403973 Anonymous
14th July 2016
Thursday 12:56 am
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>>403972

Any action you take that is intended to artificially inflate your search engine rankings. Google state the most common dodgy practices in their Webmaster Guidelines, but that list isn't exhaustive. To quote Google:

>Avoid tricks intended to improve search engine rankings. A good rule of thumb is whether you'd feel comfortable explaining what you've done to a website that competes with you, or to a Google employee. Another useful test is to ask, "Does this help my users? Would I do this if search engines didn't exist?"

https://support.google.com/webmasters/answer/35769?hl=en&ref_topic=6002025

Some examples:

Links to your website from other sites are highly valuable in SEO terms. Writing great articles and publicising them on social media is absolutely fine. Spamming links in blog comments and forum posts, buying links or participating in a link exchange scheme is banned.

Writing an article with search keywords in mind is fine - you should be aware of what people are searching for and use those terms in your text. Filling articles with irrelevant terms or hiding a load of keywords in small text is banned.
>> No. 403976 Anonymous
14th July 2016
Thursday 6:19 pm
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Nice to have thread where the word webmaster is thrown about without being linked to xenophobia and dolphin rape.
>> No. 403977 Anonymous
14th July 2016
Thursday 7:12 pm
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.gs "Mates rates". Enter code "auntiefucker" for 100% off all trips to Nepal.

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>> No. 403958 Anonymous
12th July 2016
Tuesday 4:42 pm
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Sup, british people. Need your help with recognizing a lyrics of this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFbNDH262Ak
Can't get it anywhere. Would be great if someone of you will try to listen to the song and write the lyrics down here.
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>> No. 403960 Anonymous
12th July 2016
Tuesday 5:30 pm
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>>403959

The indecipherable fragment is at 1:21, if anyone wants to have a go.

£130 on discogs, fuck me.
>> No. 403961 Anonymous
12th July 2016
Tuesday 6:07 pm
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"I've been on this road for ages and still ain't got a lift".

I assume a reference to hitchhiking.
>> No. 403962 Anonymous
12th July 2016
Tuesday 6:25 pm
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You are kindness itself, good sirs.
>> No. 403963 Anonymous
12th July 2016
Tuesday 10:17 pm
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>>403962

You're welcome, lad.
>> No. 403965 Anonymous
13th July 2016
Wednesday 2:29 am
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>>403959
The situation's insane.

Listening to this EP, these are some cracking songs, yet it appears there is hardly any information about this band online (let alone lyrics, as OP discovered). Has anyone else on .gs ever heard of them or this album before?

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>> No. 403930 Anonymous
11th July 2016
Monday 10:10 pm
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Could we have a thread for those words you can't quite think of that describe perfectly what you want to say?

I'm looking for the word that describes the history of a word, not epistemology but I don't think it's too far different.
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>> No. 403935 Anonymous
11th July 2016
Monday 10:28 pm
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>>403930

Is there a word for someone so lonely that a website, the trolling of its userbase and the stalking of its users and mods is their only interaction with the outside world, albeit consistently negative interaction?
>> No. 403936 Anonymous
11th July 2016
Monday 10:30 pm
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>>403931

Not to be confused with entomology.
>> No. 403940 Anonymous
11th July 2016
Monday 10:49 pm
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>>403935
"You".
>> No. 403943 Anonymous
11th July 2016
Monday 11:28 pm
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>>403935
Dude. That is way dark.
>> No. 403948 Anonymous
12th July 2016
Tuesday 11:12 am
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>>403943
Word, homie.

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>> No. 403711 Anonymous
6th July 2016
Wednesday 9:11 pm
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Have you ever gone rogue or known someone else do,it in a major way?
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>> No. 403718 Anonymous
7th July 2016
Thursday 12:49 pm
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I know a bloke who suffers occasional paranoiac psychotic fugues (lovely when he is well) who once walked down the high street of his very unremarkable small town populated by pensioners waving an axe above his head in what he thought was self defence against something or other.

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>> No. 402660 Anonymous
16th June 2016
Thursday 6:39 pm
402660 FLOOD
Dudley pleb here, help we are drowning! The rain is pissing down, roads are flooded out and it keeps coming. Also lightning
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>> No. 403652 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 7:04 pm
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Dudley? More like Floodley!
Am I too late?
>> No. 403660 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 8:02 pm
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>>403652
Unfortunately it appears that tragically Dudley survived the downpour.
>> No. 403681 Anonymous
5th July 2016
Tuesday 2:10 am
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Good bit of rain, keeps the streets free of chavs.
>> No. 403682 Anonymous
5th July 2016
Tuesday 6:51 am
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>>403681
Those little bags they wear act as a floating device so they always come back. Only the harsh cold of winter can successfully lower their numbers.
>> No. 403714 Anonymous
6th July 2016
Wednesday 11:34 pm
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>>403660
There's always next time

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>> No. 403411 Anonymous
30th June 2016
Thursday 10:29 pm
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Why did you change your name from Yahweh to The Great White Whale about 1400 years ago and become a monoglot from Hebrew to Arabic. Thanks.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSdGr4K4qLg
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>> No. 403676 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 9:54 pm
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>>403674

>Ew, the resentment is practically bubbling out of my monitor.

I don't care what people do with their lives really.

Just seems to me that "comedian" is a fallback for many people, before putting their liberal arts degree to work in a chip shop.
>> No. 403677 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 9:57 pm
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>>403673

It should perhaps be noted that BRILLIANT in all-caps is a vocabulary replacement for the word describing an acutely angled geometric surface.
>> No. 403678 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 9:59 pm
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>>403676

>I don't care what people do with their lives really

What if they decide to decapitate kittens? Even that wouldn't awaken a residue of botherment in you? You monster.
>> No. 403679 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 10:49 pm
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>>403678

>What if they decide to decapitate kittens? Even that wouldn't awaken a residue of botherment in you? You monster.

As long as they do it kosher, what do I care.
>> No. 403680 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 11:54 pm
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>>403654

>I'm not sure it's a comedian's role or prerogative to provide political alternatives to things they rail against. Can you name any who do? I'm not asking this rhetorically, I'm honestly curious.

People like Robert Newman, Mark Thomas, Josie Long and Bridget Christie do so explicitly.

I'd argue that all comedians do so implicitly, in terms of attitude rather than stated policy. A comedian can sneer and belittle, or they can include and celebrate. They can unify or divide. They can mock the foibles of "them", or point out what "they" have in common with "us". Bernard Manning and Roy Chubby Brown aren't political comedians, but their work reflects a clear political position.

Consider Caroline Aherne and Victoria Wood. They were never overtly political, but they were powerful advocates for women and the working class. They celebrated ordinary people, they espoused a world view based on warmth and affection. They never looked down their nose at anyone, they never presented anyone as being inferior.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1t8_vWhHcBE

The theme tune to the much-derided Dinnerladies. Listen to the lyrics and you'll find a profoundly eloquent political statement. Between the lines, Wood says "Life is hard for a lot of people and I empathise with that hardship. You might wear a nylon tabard to work, but your life is just as valuable and meaningful as anyone else's. You are real and you matter."

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>> No. 402071 Anonymous
29th May 2016
Sunday 8:55 pm
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New Top Gear is shite. 2/10
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>> No. 403664 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 8:24 pm
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>>403663

I'm a fan of Dick Cavett so I don't think that's the reason.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C8m9vDRe8fw
>> No. 403665 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 8:25 pm
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>>403662
He's a totally passable interviewer. I would never sit down and watch his show (or any talk show at that) but the clips I've seen have never given a vibe of awkwardness. And I've no idea where you got "snob" from.

Your reaction seems a bit over the top given that he is fundamentally just a man on the television.
>> No. 403666 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 8:35 pm
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>>403665

I take it you've never watched Points Of View?
>> No. 403667 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 8:47 pm
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>>403666

Blah bloopity blaaah-blah-blah!
>> No. 403668 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 8:48 pm
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>>403643
These are the FACTS.

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>> No. 403415 Anonymous
1st July 2016
Friday 2:21 am
403415 spacer
7.30 am today
100 years ago
Whistles blowing

We will remember them
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>> No. 403544 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 5:39 pm
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>>403515
>>403517
This is an old theory drawn from incomplete evidence in the inter-war period (particularly in diplomatic cables) and the political motivations of those who advocate it. Such as half-rate comedians who dabble in political activism and whose ideas are spread by youtube.

The Ice Town railway did represent a geopolitical crisis however it was largely resolved by 1913 between Britain and the Ottoman Empire (who I will add didn't see eye to eye with Germany on this) with a Anglo-German agreement coming a few months before the outbreak of war. Whilst the issue of who will end up controlling what came up within allied camps as the war rolled on concern with German influence was always upon India. How could it not.

If you want to understand the causes of this conflict I recommend watching the documentary series '37 Days' which was painstakingly pieced together using all the diplomatic cables and meeting notes we now have.
>> No. 403546 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 5:56 pm
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>>403544
I googled 'ice town railway' and nothing came up. Was it a typo?
>> No. 403548 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 6:49 pm
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>>403546
Its the city Kuupik Kleist used to live in before we toppled him for allegedly having giant fishing hooks.
>> No. 403550 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 7:20 pm
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>>403548
Does it sound like putting your father in a sack?
>> No. 403639 Anonymous
4th July 2016
Monday 5:58 pm
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There died a myriad,
And of the best, among them,
For an old bitch gone in the teeth,
For a botched civilization.

Charm, smiling at the good mouth,
Quick eyes gone under earth’s lid,

For two gross of broken statues,
For a few thousand battered books.

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>> No. 398951 Anonymous
11th January 2016
Monday 7:06 am
398951 Goodnight Sweet Duke
Fuck

Music legend David Bowie dies - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-35278872
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>> No. 403577 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 11:56 pm
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>>403564
She ruled that era of telly.
>> No. 403579 Anonymous
3rd July 2016
Sunday 12:25 am
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>>403576

M7 you just weren't in London today moaning with everyone about how wrong democracy is and how great it would be to be ruled by an unelected elite federal state. Racist. Just wait til Owen Jones finds out.
>> No. 403580 Anonymous
3rd July 2016
Sunday 12:38 am
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>>403564
I managed to find what was probably the best one on the 'Tube, but some cunts called "BBC Worldwide" have apparently had it taken down, the cunts.

Remember the one with the cloud?
>> No. 403581 Anonymous
3rd July 2016
Sunday 1:17 am
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She was proper owned by a proper comedian like ARE BERNARD

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88kzmOUTqfw
>> No. 403582 Anonymous
3rd July 2016
Sunday 1:31 am
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>>403581
Ah, the good old days, back when Bernard Manning was actually allowed within a hundred yards of a TV camera.

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>> No. 403489 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 8:30 am
403489 From Russia with love Locked
Helo, motherfuckers. Whatcha u doing?
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>> No. 403510 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 9:25 am
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>>403489
Wasn't Russian imageboard culture killed when they started banning certain websites? Or have you lot been co-opted to Putin's internet hate machine?
>> No. 403511 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 9:31 am
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>>403489
You are too here for memes?
>> No. 403512 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 9:32 am
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>>403510
They didn't get imageboards yet.
>> No. 403513 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 9:36 am
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>>403495
I don't even know what I can tell. M-m-m... it's full of crazy schoolboys and fat girls. 50% likes to be "depressive", 50% likes to be funny, and everybody likes alcohol, weed and Putin. And everybody hates other countries.
>> No. 403514 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 10:37 am
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Hello Russia. You're welcome to post here, but this sort of thread and talking about being Russian (or in >>403513's case, telling other Russians what it's like to be in Russia) go in /zoo/, specifically >>/zoo/22468
Thank you.

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>> No. 402609 Anonymous
12th June 2016
Sunday 3:23 am
402609 Toilet roll
I was bored so I stuck my willy in a toilet roll tube. It just about fit and my helmet popped out the other end. Do you think if I posted this on mumsnet I would get lots of sex with yummy mummies.
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>> No. 402754 Anonymous
19th June 2016
Sunday 11:23 pm
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>>402751
Why? Just wait and use the bathroom. Fucking filth.
>> No. 402755 Anonymous
19th June 2016
Sunday 11:41 pm
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>>402751
I think you have to ask yourself why your bird is scrubbing out her minge in the first place. That's just weird.
>> No. 402757 Anonymous
19th June 2016
Sunday 11:47 pm
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>>402754>>402755
http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/a1875847-Do-you-dunk-your-penis
>> No. 402758 Anonymous
19th June 2016
Sunday 11:51 pm
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>>402755
I pity you that can't get a lass wet.
>> No. 403488 Anonymous
2nd July 2016
Saturday 6:58 am
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what the fuck is wrong with you people....

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>> No. 402319 Anonymous
5th June 2016
Sunday 6:52 pm
402319 Conversion
Have any of you converted Religiously or do you have any religious anecdotes?
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>> No. 403380 Anonymous
30th June 2016
Thursday 3:46 pm
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>>403379
>Are you trying to tell me that there's no cabal of rich people who believe in occultism and use child sacrifices in their rituals? That this is absolutely just not happening?
Remember those scary videos with the kids? If we were to believe them, it would be the first documented case, ever, in human history, of it actually happening. Naturally, like every other time it came up, the evidence had been fabricated. The kids had been coached.

The whole Jewish blood sacrifice thing is nonsense straight out of Protocols.
>> No. 403381 Anonymous
30th June 2016
Thursday 4:37 pm
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>>403380
>If we were to believe them, it would be the first documented case, ever, in human history, of it actually happening.
No actually, it wouldn't. If you'd watched the video I posted, you'd see that there's genuinely been several recorded cases of a child's cadaver being discovered showing signs of extensive torture along with a lot of punctures in the skin (for the sake of draining blood).

Also, on what grounds are you dismissing the Protocols? We're talking about the same book right? About the Jewish checklist for world domination?
>> No. 403382 Anonymous
30th June 2016
Thursday 4:52 pm
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>>403381
>If you'd watched the video I posted
Why would anyone want to do something silly like that?
>> No. 403400 Anonymous
30th June 2016
Thursday 7:34 pm
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>>403379

Everything on the internet is true, Ickelad, everything.
>> No. 403403 Anonymous
30th June 2016
Thursday 7:58 pm
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>>403379
Vampires, lad.
Cite the individual cases rather than a long Youtube film.

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>> No. 403175 Anonymous
28th June 2016
Tuesday 12:23 pm
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>>402786
Is picrelated true?
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>> No. 403211 Anonymous
28th June 2016
Tuesday 5:01 pm
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>>403194
>Americans vote Republican/Democrat because these are the parties that provide their communities benefits. Places like Wales and Cornwall should have voted remain under this logic but they didn't.
Americans don't follow that logic either. States which are the biggest beneficiaries of federal spending tend to be the most staunchly Republican, despite the Republicans being the party with a budget cutting fetish.
>> No. 403213 Anonymous
28th June 2016
Tuesday 5:14 pm
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>>403211
It's one of the great ironies of American politics. They call it pork barrel politics - the voters don't like the idea of wasteful spending in other states and districts, but don't mind so much when their own representatives "bring home the pork".
>> No. 403215 Anonymous
28th June 2016
Tuesday 5:29 pm
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>>403199

>770,000 years before the Channel formed, making us not a part of mainland France.

We were indeed connected to mainland Europe by a broad land mass called Doggerland, which stretched from northern Germany to northwestern France and covered most of what is now the southern half of the North Sea. It gradually became submerged when sea levels rose after the last Ice Age some 10,000 years ago, and it was actually inhabited by mesolithic humans. It was rich, fertile land, and it is speculated that much of it looked like the low-lying parts of East Anglia.
>> No. 403218 Anonymous
28th June 2016
Tuesday 5:41 pm
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>>403213
I wouldn't be so negative about it. I once had a freind in Mississippi explain why he votes Republican and its because Republicans actually care about the communities they represent in the area in the same way democrats care about those behind the blue wall, this is after all the nation of Huey Long. Pork Barrel spending is a problem at the national level but at the local level its about keeping a factory open that is putting food on the table for sizeable percentage of the community. Coal mines in particular are a huge issue for America but if the coal mines collapse (as they are) the very poorest regions of the country will be devastated as we might remember from Thatcher.

In a way I think our devolved politics is heading this way, yeah you might not want independence but which party out of all of them is going to stuff money in YOUR pocket without raising taxes and which one can pull strings in Westminster to ensure your shipbuilding industry keeps ticking.

Complain ticked for probable fluff.
>> No. 403306 Anonymous
29th June 2016
Wednesday 4:46 pm
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>>403218

>In a way I think our devolved politics is heading this way, yeah you might not want independence but which party out of all of them is going to stuff money in YOUR pocket without raising taxes and which one can pull strings in Westminster to ensure your shipbuilding industry keeps ticking.

People rarely care more about the world around them than the question of how politics affects their life very immediately. If a government cuts their industry's jobs, such as Thatcher did with the coal industry, then they will not vote for that particular politician or government. On the other hand, many upwardly mobile Yuppies of the 1980s who got rich in the stock market at the time were fervent supporters of Thatcher's politics because Thatcher's privatisation boom made many of them quite wealthy.

That's it. Plain and simple. Put food on somebody's table, i.e. protect their job that puts food on their table, and they will vote for you.

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>> No. 403296 Anonymous
29th June 2016
Wednesday 8:28 am
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Locked
Do gatherings in London? In Moscow there!
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>> No. 403302 Anonymous
29th June 2016
Wednesday 3:52 pm
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May I politely direct you to /zoo/, and kindly request that you and your countrymen try not to buy up all the houses in London in the coming months; some of us still need to live there.

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